What predicts PROMISCUITY? | Jordan Peterson

What predicts PROMISCUITY? | Jordan Peterson
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[@Percyus1999]

I have been insecure toward relationships because of partners being unfaithful but as I gradually form understanding I realize that the signs are there way before and blaming yourself is truly unjust. Took me years to see this but it's like a massive weight lifted from my chest because I don't feel afraid anymore. Only through self love was I able to reach this point of perspective. It's one thing to be told something but another to truly understand.

[@santoscarrillo2996]

So what did you find out....

[@JellyJay16]

So what are the signs?

[@Percyus1999]

I hope I can do you guys justice on this but just bear in mind it's based on my experiences and I am 23 so you might feel differently and that's completely fine. 1) NEVER encourage monkey branching (the act of dating someone else while they are claiming to end it with another person for xyz reasons). If you think that they only did that for you then you are sorely mistaken and should avoid it at all costs because this shows their behaviour when things get tough they will run and you will be left hurting. They once cared about the person they were with and now they don't have the respect to end things first. If they can flirt while in a relationship like that you are just on a timer. 2) Excessive insecurity, if you have to manage every little insecurity they have to the point where it's like you are their secretary, leave. They need to work on their life and it's not healthy for you to try to fix their problems. You will become drained and they will feel so entitled to your help that once you appear weak they will think you have nothing left to offer or that you don't "love" them like you used to. They'll likely start idealizing someone else that puts them on a pedestal or alternatively you succeed in helping them with their insecurities and they decide they are better than you because their ego is huge and go for someone else. This can destroy you so please be careful and put yourself first. Relationship is group work not a solo mission. 3) If you can't ask questions freely or feel like you are walking on egg shells around topics you find important don't waste your time. Communication is a huge thing and if you can't even do that what's the point? That lack of communication will turn into secrecy and hatred and I don't need to explain how that story can end. 4) Never go back to a cheater. I firmly believe in this one. Once they have stained your trust you can never forget it completely. Going back shows them you are willing to compromise your feelings just to keep them and that is a power play. Nobody "accidentally" cheats that's just a lack of ability to accept responsibility. No reason they give can justify it. They could just leave but they choose not to. They are willing to hurt you to get what they want and they will use every excuse in the book to rationalize their guilt. Always remember it's not your fault that a cheater cheats. We always have a choice and they made theirs so it's your turn to make yours and walk away. 5) Don't tolerate disrespect, if you are being disrespected in a relationship that's already a sign to leave because they won't care if you get hurt and if they get the upper hand on you don't expect much mercy. You'll be fighting for the high ground constantly. The second you feel they are trying to put you down ESPECIALLY to validate their want/point it's not for you. Disputes can always be handled in a respectful manner if they truly care for you they'll try to make you understand or they are not at the level of maturity that is needed. Don't meet them at their level or you will be sucked in. Silence speaks volumes. This is what I could think of from the top of my head but feel free to pick and choose what you feel is relevant. To everyone that is hurt and struggling with unfaithful people, if you are willing to fight for yourself you can make it. Prioritize self love + development and the rest starts falling into place. Take it easy on yourself the world is already a tough place. I've been through all these situations and still have a big heart ready to tackle what comes at me without being jaded but I'm not going to act like I didn't have to walk through hell to learn but I'm stronger now.

[@maJastoL]

Your picture goes too well with this comment

[@nelitodesousa5855]

@@Percyus1999 are you a guy or a girl?

[@vanessadisco6643]

What predicts promiscuity? A desperate need for attention and validation

[@timmyotoole6063]

nope. extroversion, openness to experience, neuroticism (esp. in women), and dark traits (narcissism, psychopathy, and machiavellianism).

[@vanessadisco6643]

@@timmyotoole6063 openness to new experiences does not indicate promiscuity... Just because a person is open to new experiences doesn't mean they don't have a moral code. It just means they're willing to try things outside of their comfort zone. But someone who is desperate for attention and desperate for validation from other people .... those are the people who will go outside of their relationship to get some attention because they NEED it. It has nothing to do with being male or female. Every single human being is susceptible to self-sabotaging behavior when they are not sovereign within themselves... When they don't know who the hell they are and they need to look to other people to validate their existence. Full stop - this is the core catalyst for all promiscuity and cheating. Because at the end of the day, if you were a stand-up person who knows who you are, what you want and treat others the way you want to be treated, you would end your current relationship before seeking out another.

[@pgbpro20]

How about high Testosterone? Good looks? High social position? Silver tongue? Because the uncomfortable truth is - at least for men - access is probably the best predictor of entry.

[@vanessadisco6643]

@@pgbpro20 I understand what you're saying and I can see how it can come across that way. But I challenge that those are simply excuses to the real issue. I challenge that anyone, male or female, who chases after or values superficial things like money, status, power... People who see others as options to fulfill check marks on a list that they've created in their head as to what a partner should be .... People who identify their value and other people's value on these things, require the attention and validation of other people in order to find their self-worth. If your self-worth and identity is wrapped up in having other people envy you for the things you have... You will always be looking to the next best thing to boost you up in status and boost your ego. Your life is self-serving. There is no loyalty in that. There's no authenticity in that. And people who are stuck in that lower frame of thinking are prime candidates for cheating. I think it's a personality flaw that is pervasive throughout our society.. a huge hurdle for human consciousness to overcome. And as chaotic as it seems.. it's really good that we're talking about all of this.

[@July16july]

But why neuroticism, anyone can explain?

[@izawaniek2568]

Thank you Jordan Peterson. Narcisistic, self- absorbed and constantly looking for attention, admiration and praise from the outside are likely to be promiscuous.

[@susanwjoh0re735]

Like his daughter

[@suraya1224]

You generalized, didn't truly comprehend what he said at the beginning of this.

[@janglandis773]

wow, that describes JP himself perfectly

[@furyberserk]

@@janglandis773 Examples?

[@johnmalcolm4822]

It's the unqualified people you should be directing your angst at. -people stepping onto the world stage , the Internet, hoping to convince someone they can accurately psychanalyze a leading clinical psychologist. As if.

[@kachowsimpson2886]

Basically if you want a healthy long term relationship don't be promiscuous and stay away from promiscuous partners

[@suraya1224]

No, not necessarily. I know several ppl, men & women, who both had just 1 sexual partner-relationship, in 30+ yr marriages, who are 'disagreeable' to the point of being violent, malevolent narcissists, & are in very dysfunctional, nasty marriages.

[@FreshUF]

@@suraya1224 Exactly. Disagreeable women are more likely to cheat and cause other types of relationship instability. They were likely already promiscuous and just continue that behavior (cheating) once in a relationship. “You can’t turn a hoe into a house wife.” Being disagreeable is the red flag.

[@HereTakeAFlower]

@@suraya1224 well, easy fix, stay away from those too.

[@sirrathersplendid4825]

@@suraya1224 - From my friends I can see that people who had maybe 5 relationships have the most stable marriages. Too many and they get bored, too few and they start wondering what they missed in life.

[@bryanutility9609]

If you want a happy long term marriage find a hooker or mistress.

[@kafkollectif525]

Is nobody aware of the correlation between childhood abuse, and promiscuity later in life? Children who are groomed to sexually please grow into adults who think that that is where their value lays.

[@candaceestrada5744]

Word. The abused get introduced to sexual behavior at a young age and learn to look for that kind of attention as they grow up. There are usually no boundaries or lines that can be crossed because at a young age they were wiped away. So yeah there’s a whole other topic to be discussed here….

[@moonknight4053]

Nah Karl that’s just another Segway to maligning up an excuse to fuck around. There’s consequences to hook up culture and jumping from minge to minge to dick to dick…. There’s consequences to everything. Don’t put it on childhood abuse, to make promiscuity less of a problem.

[@sonofhibbs4425]

It’s interesting because the behavior types Peterson points out here correlate to behavioral issues in those sexually abused, yes. I don’t think it could account for all those with these behaviors. However I do get the sense we as a society have not really discovered the full scope of sexual abuse in its forms. For one, no one seems to mention sexual abuse to a child from another child. Rather it’s sloughed off as ‘’kids just experimenting’’. Or even kids viewing certain media that is way too explicit for their age- somehow to help that is also sexual abuse because it’s shaping a mind that is not equipped to handle such. There used to be extreme prohibitions to such media but ever since it’s permeated media we have a huge rise in mental disorders and promiscuity.

[@sonofhibbs4425]

EDIT: I meant ‘’view’’ instead of ‘’help’’ in my next to last sentence. You tube does not let me edit my comments anymore.

[@alaalfa8839]

It's like eating food, and thinking an hour later whether the food tasted good. Everything backward. If people practice meditation and metacognition, stoicism they become happier and healthier. They realize little things are more valuable than materialism.

[@veldrensavoth7119]

Yeah that sounds like me back when I was sleeping around. I was tired of just being friends with women and being there emotional tampons or a shoulder to cry on whenever their boyfriends made them sad. So I just started going out and hooking up with women. Now that I’m older I realize that what I’m craving is A advanced/adult level of Intimacy that is not one sided. And the first step to doing that is realizing that I need to get over a desire to be desired by every woman and make myself desirable to myself. And that’s just the first step

[@OneEyedKeys]

Good comment. Been there, about a decade ago. Once you solidify yourself, and are true to yourself, you will find flighty women, no matter how attractive, will bounce off you, because you do not need their games or sexuality. They will see it too, that they have no 'hold' on you, and move on. (if you can resist the temptation.). Afterwards you will see that more solid women, who are ready to make a commitment with a solid masculine partner, will harken to you. Then you are in the 'driver's seat', and can choose amongst them with a cool head who you would be a reliable and contributing partner to your life plan long term, and who would not be. There are many women thirsting for this, modern bullshit feminism aside, and they are not finding enough men who are solid enough to tame their aspirations and emotional tumultuousness. Yet if you are solid within yourself, and do not deisire their lust, but only their commitment and respect, you will find a slew of ready women willing to take on the burden of being your partner and assuming the roles you need of them, be it socially, or sexually.

[@luludee1300]

Just curious if you know why you desired to be desired by EVERY woman?

[@veldrensavoth7119]

@@luludee1300 because I was tired of because growing up I didn’t feel attractive. I was shallow yes like how most teens are yes, but I was tired of none of the women I like liking me. I was jealous that how the other boys could get female attention and admiration and I was just lucky to get the time of day. I had seen women run barefoot in the snow to go talk to this guy, meanwhile I’m like the hunchback of Notre dame. I couldn’t wait to turn 18 so I could run around and have sex with as many grown women as possible so I could prove to the world that I am a human. I’m just as Good as you in that I am good enough that I am a man. That I’m not some freak who dosent deserve to reproduce. That I’m just as good as any one else. But sex isn’t meant to vengeful. Love isn’t vengeful. And I hurt a lot of people doing that. And I realized now that what I want more then anything is to have a woman I care about happy to see me. To want me near her. To feel safe around me. To stand next to me with pride. For her to say this is the man I want to have children with. And the first think I must do is stop being a vengeful 15 yr old and be somebody worth a damn and I feel like I get closer to that everyday.

[@perry6712]

I'm in my 30s never slept around and I want too know how this feels should I sleep around or just try to find a good woman

[@veldrensavoth7119]

@@perry6712 look for a good one/ wait for a good one. Build yourself so you can be seen by Good women. Don’t run around acting like a Witcher , how I did. It’s not worth it lol

[@TheFuryHasCome]

Dated someone like this and it used to make me think I was the one making mistakes in the relationship which led to them trying to gravitate towards others. But I then realized that has more to do with them having an extreme need for validation and attention which isn’t normal whatsoever. What’s normal is trying to make compromises to suit one another better so that your relationship can continue, what they were doing wasn’t it. Soon as I realized that, it was much easier to separate from them entirely. If you’re going through that, it’s not you that’s the problem. That said, if you’re both not working out a solution to continue your partnership, then it’s not going to work out. Make peace with that and go and heal. You tried, they didn’t.

[@ChristopherNicholasMakarov4120]

It's called a narcissist my friend promiscuity and narcissistic people are horrible.

[@markh4926]

I told her to "Go away!" She didn't like that, so she never did go away, she pestered me for over a year. Wish I never met her. She may be pretty outside but nasty inside.

[@Muansang]

​@@markh4926hehe

[@Dem765]

Fatherlessness and being molested as a child seem to be obvious patterns for promiscuity and single motherhood, as well as general destructive behaviors and instability

[@Coastpsych_fi99]

Sexual assault

[@Luminous.Dynamics]

So would you say it's their fault for cheating if they went through something like that? My girlfriend was abused/m○lested A few times when she was growing up. She has BPD. She cheated on me. She never planned on telling me I found out for myself. She did it because she was not happy in the relationship and didn't feel empathy for me when she was doing it because she was not happy. I love her so much but I don't know if I should continue with her. I don't know if it's excusable because of mental illness yet I really don't know. What do you think

[@Dem765]

@@Luminous.Dynamics I was diagnosed with BPD. If she cheated on you then you should leave her immediately and go completely no contact, because she almost certainly feels zero remorse. I can't imagine anyone with BPD betraying someone they actually cared about, which means it's safe to assume that you don't really matter to her. The issue is after you leave, if you don't go zero contact then it will get messy and be pointless. I think you already know the answer and don't need to hear this from me

[@Luminous.Dynamics]

@@Dem765 What if what she did was not in person cheating? 4 days ago I found out that she cheated on me back in late October/early November. Her and a guy she met from a different country touch_d themselves on video call/camera. But of course, probably not before building some kind of emotional connection, she "didn't feel happy here" she said. She claims she was vulnerable & didn't feel much empathy for me before doing it because she felt very unhappy from issues we have had. She seems sorry about it now, she even told me to do what she did, to do it and maybe we can feel at hand. I need help. I love her so much still and I can't believe that i still do. I feel scared to cut her off. I need some tips on how to make them earn me back? If thats even possible....from panic & anxiousness I kind of quickly ended up having the behavior of forgiveness and I said we can try it again..... but I feel very angry and depressed at same time. I can be talking to her & forget it for a little bit before an intrusive idea pops into my head and i bring that whole thing up. I really regret finding out. It has destroyed what i thought of her. So far it has been impossible to leave. I think, like maybe if i had been easier to get along with she wouldnt have done it. My brain also says "well....it wasnt in person, no one touched her in real life right?" Is it the same as in person cheating...? She told me that she would have never done something in person with anyone. She tells me that she wanted attention and she felt excited to talk to somebody that was randomly nice to her. Although that's where I question why the nasty stuff they did took place. She said he was nice and supportive of her from the start and then just got kind of pushy and he told her it was gonna be OK if they did things and she believed it. She said she only knew him for about a week and a half. Im crushed.

[@Dem765]

@@Luminous.Dynamics if she was genuinely remorseful she wouldn't be playing victim, she'd be taking full responsibility. And she won't be attracted to you anyway if you're willing to put up with such behavior, over time she won't even see you as a man. But I don't recommend asking for advice from strangers you don't know, you're going to do what you want anyway

[@Doc-Holliday1851]

A lack of self respect and an inability to delay gratification.

[@johndavies7626]

Self absorption, lack of empathy and anger. A lot of cheating is down to anger or it's a prominent part of it. I'm angry because of my life, I'm angry because things are my fault and I can't/won't face that, I basically blame others at every turn and my way of getting revenge on you is by cheating, and hurting/shaming yourself in the process. There's lots of ways of acting out anger, cheating is one of them...it's exciting, pleasurable and gives you a false sense of power over the person your cheating on, a sense of control. Pain is a part of life and at least it's me in control of it. Extroversion must be important too.

[@fowchiiiliedpuppiesdied]

Childhood sexual abuse.

[@P.I.M.P.720]

I've done extensive research a d come up with the same results 💯

[@rob21]

A big factor in promiscuity is {Opportunity without consequences}. It's why a lot of people cheat on business trips, vacations, etc.

[@novelacollection]

And lack of morals

[@johnmalcolm4822]

It takes two. So people in their home town hook up with temporary visitors to that town. While WW2 Australian soldiers were catching syphilis in French brothels ( more died from that than from battle ) their wives were entertaining the well groomed American soldiers on leave in Australia

[@johnmalcolm4822]

@@novelacollection Lack of morals is already part of the meaning of "cheat". Whether or not it applies to all cases of promiscuity (such as when everyone involved is aware and ok with what is happening ) is not so clear-cut.

[@johnmalcolm4822]

Jordan Peterson maintains there are always consequences for dishonesty.

[@brandiphillips5775]

No way. Some people can't just be intimate with strangers. It's weird and gross.

[@sisterhoodwithchantel]

For some it’s Trauma ( child sexual abuse and abuse in general) which leads to low self esteem which leads to hyper-sexuality !

[@SHNASTTV]

Also sex feels like the most amazing thing in the world. Lol. It's not like it's cutting. Literally everyone wants to have sex. It's why we are here. We can't be here without it.

[@saynotohookups]

@@SHNASTTV Wrong. Not everyone wants to have sex. There are sexual abuse survivors who want nothing to do with sex or even relationships. There maybe those who simply have no desire for it. Then there are people who remain single and abstinent.

[@Trees_Bees_Onesies]

Promiscuity can be a trauma response too

[@pennyhawkins7741]

Yes, it is. 👏

[@divergentsenior]

My promiscuity phase was a direct result of being molested (sexualized) before age 7. It is something that I worry about with all this crap in schools today. It truncates your natural emotional growth and teaches that inappropriate intimacy is the way to relate to the opposite sex. It is a reprehensible thing to do to any child.

[@EtherealEmpr3ss]

This is SO true. Some of my earliest memories are of being molested. I was 3-5. By age 8 I thought I thought I was worthless and I resolved to perhaps being a single mother in my adulthood. In retrospect that is so scary. Out of my fear of getting pregnant (once I hit puberty at least) my sexuality was internalized. I just became addicted to having orgasms. And would masturbate compulsively just to orgasm. It became something I did almost mindlessly, like blinking. Eventually those habits imploded on me. I was forced to address the affects of the trauma (Because I’ve constantly addressed the trauma) and now I’ve been rehabilitating myself, with my husband, on what it means to have a meaningful connection. I used to seriously envy my husband as he had never experienced being someone’s living sex doll…. I wanted to know what is life like when that part of you is still in tact? I was frustrated. I’m just so thankful I was able to move passed that, and passed damaging the intimacy of a relationship I highly valued.

[@divergentsenior]

@@EtherealEmpr3ss thank you so much for having the courage to share such painful and intimate details of your life. I envy you for pushing through. My own experience was buried so deep It wasn't until I made a chance remark during a therapy session when I was 40 that the door to the source of my behavior opened. 34 years later, I am able to face and discuss it, but the disconnect with a partner on an emotional intimacy level is, apparently, permanent. Are you as concerned as I about the early specializing of our kids, in the name of alternative sexualities’ equity? I believe in my depths there is a sinister agenda pushing this narrative to normalize and recruit kids to behaviors they cannot understand at such a young age. What is most concerning to me is how, like ADHD and autism spectrum before it, some parents are using these as a way to get empathy and attention because it makes their kid special. Today, if your kid is run of the mill cis-gender and not a string of made-up adjectives, the parent does not stand out. The unintended consequence is how it makes kids so vulnerable to predators.

[@EtherealEmpr3ss]

@@divergentsenior No need to thank me, I didn’t realize it before but I learned throughout my years that just talking about it helps not just me but others. It’s a horrible thing that happened but I no longer give authority to rule my person, I’ll always be hoping the same for others who can relate to our experience. I think talking to children about sex and how to have it as such a young age is a form of sexual abuse. Discussing anatomy and function with 10+ year olds is one thing But describing in explicit detail the different ways sex can be experienced is like verbal pornography and I find it detestable. I will be homeschooling my children.

[@divergentsenior]

@@EtherealEmpr3ss Totally agree. Bless you.

[@sirprize5191]

I lived the worst pedophilia by my mom and molestation and turned the opposite. Disgusted by promiscuity and sluts. It could be an asshole thing to say but I'm proud it made me even more revolted by promiscuity. I just dump ppl like that, no regrets no drama

[@trumpingtonfanhurst694]

no father or father figure or stable family life as a child seems a big one

[@samrapheal1828]

CGA covers this extensively on his blog/podcasts.

[@DarBC77]

@@samrapheal1828who is CGA?

[@haleygray6443]

What predicts promiscuity? Lack of empathy, Lack of integrity, lack of defined values and cowardice…. Assuming by that you mean the ability to betray your husband or wife and gamble with their mental health- if by promiscuity you are just thinking someone who sleeps around a lot without the commitment made to a partner that probably has more to do with the big 5 traits.

[@suraya1224]

Rape victims are very typically promiscuous, bcs they have low self esteem, & are looking for love to soothe their emotional pain.

[@darylallen2485]

Its interesting that promiscuity is so closely associated with marriage for you. Some people are promiscuous prior to a commitment of marriage. Of course some are promiscuous while married also. However, when I think of promiscuity, I assume its mostly something done by unmarried people. Its interesting that you associate it with the inverse.

[@rturtle5795]

For sure cluster b people.. 😩

[@johnmalcolm4822]

The availability of willing players is a big factor. Someone with no chance of attracting more than one person may still desire to. The lack of opportunity does not make them more ethical.

[@HereTakeAFlower]

@@darylallen2485 it's likely because the married status has a defined set of rules most people agree with, and the unmarried status doesn't.

[@KC-dr4qz]

Promiscious girls i have met are from broken families. Usually the dad left when these girls were in their early teens. They try to find acceptance, and take stored anger out on their missing dad by being overly loose. In a way trying to get back at their dad, by disappointing him eventually.

[@jennbrandon8182]

I also agree with the notion that children with divorced Patents are more likely to Cheat and also the get a divorce in the Future. All the men I know who cheated come all from broken Families with an absent dad

[@asiachestnut4210]

Yeap

[@infjlion]

My parents are divorced and I was always the one who was beeing cheated on (by partners from "perfect" families). I was abused in many different ways you can imagine, still loyal. Sorry, but I am sick and tired of this theory, it's such a discrimination. Sometimes we, children from broken homes, are more successful and better people: I graduated, became a teacher, served the army and now I'm a mother. My husband on the other hand is from a perfect family, he had everything in life (he wasn't even able to finish elementary school without connections, since his father was a military pilot). Filed for divorce since he is a narcopath on pot. He couldn't care less about our son. Cheated all the time (found condoms in the baby's room). Now you are asking why did I marry him? Just because I am not good enough for society since I am a child of divorced parents, even though I have all the qualities of a decent and hardworking person. At least here in the Balkans....

[@bryanutility9609]

Like you don’t bang them anyway... LMAO

[@rizzamaeong]

wrong. generalization. black and white mentality.

[@Blue_Ocean720]

I wish there was more peterson videos on personality traits and what they may predict like this. I think it’s fascinating and helps us to understand ourselves and other people better.

[@kimberlygolden7095]

Summary: What predicts promiscuity: extroversion, openness to experience, neuroticism (especially in women) and dark traits (ie. narcissism psychopathy and machiavellianism).

[@latinaalma1947]

What full lecture is this from? God it is so frustrating to get just snippets!!!!! I have seen most of Jordans undergrad lectures on YT. Source please!!!! Sybil Francis PhD

[@neverrip7132]

The notes make it even more confusing.

[@melk.3485]

Source is linked in the description

[@MLKusername]

But think of that intro speaker... If you get the non bootlegged version of JP, you'll miss out on the underwater Indian intros.

[@latinaalma1947]

Takes me only to a list of Jordans videos grrr.

[@echoface1670]

@@MLKusername Haha. that is funnee

[@BrasingtonAssociates]

All the bad stuff is directly aligned to the big five traits that correlate to ADHD…great

[@jonny1943]

Adhd is very wide.

[@outlander234]

Get off internet for a week and you will be cured of it.

[@TheRealJP777]

@@outlander234, stop talking about things you clearly know nothing about. I've had ADHD since I was born, which was way before the internet was widely available to anyone except high end universities and the government. Let the experts talk on this subject, and just stick to your own area of knowledge from now on.

[@outlander234]

@@TheRealJP777 Today internet os main cause but in general its lack of focua. Iam sorry but I dont believe you do have it, nor do I believe its a condition. So nothing can hold your attention? Nothing? How do you function then? No. You dont have attention to stuff you arent interested or have knowledge off or arwnt naturally talented for. In school I was considred bright and I had insane attention but thats only because I was more naturally talwnted in some things but also I always payed attention from day one so I maintained that skill. Some kids havent and off course thwir attention deteriorated. In highschool that happened to me despite me never ever being diagnosed. I could not study or pay attention. Guess why? Because I lost interest in school, stopped studying, paying attention and spent most of my time surfing the internet. Suddenly I wasnt so bright eh? Its like somebody declaring they have been diagnosed that they cant eun fast despite not having biological problems simply they never trained their body.

[@smallgoon]

@@outlander234 bruh you have no idea what you're talking about. Drugs like Adderall have completely different effects on people that have been diagnosed w ADHD and people that don't.

[@123goca]

How beautiful it is that men and women are only 10% overlapping! We are complementary to each other, and also we were made to be together as one. We need each other. Nature/God did a great job making us - people! We should be more grateful! 🙏

[@Soma2501]

Good Traits: - Agreeableness (correlated w/ being less likely to work evenings) - Conscientiousness - Honesty & Humility - Autistic-like traits Promiscuous/relationship instability/divorce Traits: - Extroversion - Openness to Experience - Neuroticism - Dark Traits (narcissism, psychopathy, machiavellianism) - Low Agreeableness - Low Conscientiousness

[@ziahreid9269]

It seems to me that the most attractive traits to women are the ones that also are associated with promiscuity.

[@MasteryOrder]

Focusing on a life of promiscuity won't bring satisfaction. Build yourself into a man of character and strength, a man of his word and master some useful skills that you can put in the service of others and you will have a great and fulfilling life. Expect the same traits in the woman in your life and you will have a chance for a life-long relationship. If you are interested in topics related to manhood and masculinity, feel free to challenge yourself with some ideas on the Mastery Order Channel and, of course, challenge back if you have other points of view. Looking forward to your opinions. All the best to you!

[@suras8984]

I guess the men that sleep around have a different confidence about them that attracts women. Confidence is attractive. It is an extremely superficial attraction though just like a gorgeous woman attracts lots of men just from her looks. Then you have the deeper attraction when you get sucked into aspects of the persons personality that are attractive to you.

[@callanc3925]

Well yeah obviously. How could they be promiscuous if women werent attracted to them lmao

[@samrapheal1828]

@@MasteryOrder Truth.

[@MasteryOrder]

@@samrapheal1828 Glad to read that you are on the same page. All the best to you!

[@InfamousX1000]

I love it when Dr. Peterson says “Eh?”

[@DrSharonFair]

People with bipolar affective disorder - when in a manic state - are also often promiscuous.

[@ARS-fn6px]

1. Fathers who treat women like sh*t and have daughters. 2.Fathers who refuse to be there for their kids. 3. S*xual trauma

[@eradutiu]

The problem I have with so much of this is that when society has rules many of these problems are minimal. Yes, there is much t say about that but my focus is on the aspect that divorces and cheating were not as prevalent in the past. Christianity governed much of life which it kept many from going outside of marriage.

[@yonatanyonatano1192]

To be fair, Judaism and Christianity tends to promote certain behaviors within one’s community which improves the likelihood of possessing these traits. “Love thy neighbor” can promote agreeableness. Holding parents to the responsibility over their children promotes conscientiousness. The belief that you’re part of a great plan and thus that your life has meaning steers people away neuroticism

[@cavelleardiel]

Don't you also think that people were busy with work and raising their family? Now it is just pleasure seeking and with a rise in wealth people have more time on their hands. Idle hands are the devil's work.

[@joblakelisbon]

Not really - you should read the accounts of the Spanish Catholics in Latin America - they were the most prolific rapists in human history.

[@sonofhibbs4425]

Well…what we KNEW about that is..and that was in a way a shield against the damages it does. Just don’t believe people were ‘’better’’ in any era. It’s simply not true. I do think there is more of it today because it’s basically been accepted as ‘the norm’. People are less apt to hold themselves accountable. In this country at least. In other countries, they still stone to death a woman for even smiling at another man. The ultimate fact of the matter is people are human, and people get urges..even nuns (translate that to :the most noble of us). History is full of accounts. Look at King David and Bathsheba. She was the wife of another man and David was chosen by God!!! It doesn’t keep one safe from temptation.

[@victoriasegall3404]

My father (1930-1998) was a very promiscuous man, up until he fell ill in his mid-60's. He had a terribly high need for validation, and always had to be the center of attention, and was a heavy-hitting narcissist. One woman was one too many, and 100 wasn't enough. The same thing with my maternal grandfather ( 1880-1968).

[@rutrakainmeiez5107]

Low self esteem and self hatred

[@johnsheetz6639]

I'm pretty much an introvert somehow I always end up with the extraverted ones they have to bring up the conversation or just make me feel like they're easy to talk to.

[@radicalhonesty3628]

prayer: perfect health abundant wealth sacred love

[@Patburkelife]

This video literally just saved my life.

[@samwilson4754]

I’m glad! What did it for you?

[@baloo1522]

@@samwilson4754 saved his life!

[@nelsonraley]

How so?

[@MasteryOrder]

Focusing on a life of promiscuity won't bring satisfaction. Build yourself into a man of character and strength, a man of his word and master some useful skills that you can put in the service of others and you will have a great and fulfilling life. Expect the same traits in the woman in your life and you will have a chance for a life-long relationship. If you are interested in topics related to manhood and masculinity, feel free to challenge yourself with some ideas on the Mastery Order Channel and, of course, challenge back if you have other points of view. Looking forward to your opinions. All the best to you!

[@dylanmichael3985]

Lovely to hear. Hope youre killing it now.

[@Amateur_Pianist_472]

Why is it that commitment to family is seen as agreeable and commitment to work is seen as disagreeable? Agreeable people do what is not good for them to avoid conflict, it’s better for most people, men and women, do be with family than answer to a boss 70 hours a week. When someone agrees to work ridiculous hours and does anything to please their boss, isn’t that agreeableness? They’re sacrificing what’s good for them. When I see someone say to their boss ‘no I can’t work overtime, I have family commitments’, they’re standing their ground and establishing boundaries.

[@adrianarroyo937]

I believe you're putting too much focus on the boss, and too little on the family. I don't think an agreeable person would stay in a job who makes him have conflict at home everyday because he works too much. He'll look for another job that allows him to don't have that conflict at home. However, a disagreeable person wouldn't mind having conflict at home if he enjoys his work, or thinks it's his duty. He'll keep working for as long as he thinks he should be working

[@nickcsuki8123]

@@adrianarroyo937 I agree.

[@HereTakeAFlower]

Agreeable and disagreeable are not really all that streamlined. Being disagreeable could also mean they are not bothered by a more competitive and demanding environment nearly as much.

[@Amateur_Pianist_472]

@@adrianarroyo937 you could also say that an agreeable person wouldn’t want to displease or inconvenience their boss and co workers by not working over time. I know I’m focusing on the boss and co workers but it is another case of conflict. You could also say that a disagreeable person wouldn’t mind conflict at work if it means that he can spend more time with his family because he enjoys that and feels it’s his duty. In a nutshell, disagreeable people will do what they feel is better for them regardless of the conflict. Psychology is complicated so I should talk to a psychologist about this stuff. As another commenter said, a disagreeable person could be what we would call ‘lazy’, someone who isn’t bothered with doing anything cuz they get nothing out of it.

[@neverrip7132]

Comparing introverts with agreeable people is like comparing apples with butt berries. They might be the same size and all but I do not eat apples

[@vanpenguin22]

Geeeeez!!!😅😅😅

[@PolishBehemoth]

That made me laugh on the inside but none on the outside. And gross.

[@Coyote-wm5op]

Everyone in the audience: interesting but I’m not any of those

[@blissfulpancake]

On Jordan Peterson's test called Understand Myself , I received a score of 0TH PERCENTILE for conscientiousness LOL .. this explains so much

[@HereTakeAFlower]

This seems like a serious handicap, hope you manage to make your life work.

[@bryanutility9609]

Hit the gym!

[@Kevin-kj5th]

Damn a 0! Mine was pretty low but all the other positive traits were high. I’ve been actively working on this. I seem to be improving

[@itayb8169]

Theres a difference between being promiscuous and cheating. You can be promisciuous when single, but you cant cheat when single.

[@micasilver210]

That's a slippery slope b/c you are grooming yourself for something opposite to fidelity, then, potentially want to practice fidelity, (for many many years??, possibly decades???.) Promiscuity= prepare to fail in marriage!) - also, a lie to your future spouse, since most people would probably not reveal their ( off-putting) ways, behaviors and attitudes reflected in their veiled habits. That's why, in Godly terms, marriage has to do with fidelity prior to marriage- it reaps fruit that keeps on giving, b/c of better self-dicipline ( = holding yourself accountable). So says the gold standard ( Word of God); besides, heading the warning that these habbits of practiced indiscretion are a sign of the cur sed: 1. Kor. 6, 9 and Hebr. 4, 12-13, among many other passages. Knowing Christ and turning away from this as well as all other sins,- HE IS the antidote (1. Kor. 6,11, and: grace to TURN: Hebr.4, 14-15).

[@johnmalcolm4822]

Anyone can cheat. It is not only thrrough legal contract that people say they will not have sex with another.

[@colbalt95]

@@micasilver210 Males naturally pairbond by protecting and providing tangibles not by sex.

[@dpeagles]

304 talk

[@johnmalcolm4822]

@@dpeagles What does that mean?

[@Random_person98]

Hi may someone give me the link of the article he refers to in the video? I would like to read it, thanks!

[@dylanmichael3985]

Sorry random guy, hope someone comes through for you..

[@dylanmichael3985]

Sorry "random person", i would never assume your pronoun.

[@Random_person98]

@@dylanmichael3985 It´s okey, statistically on the Internet you find more guys. More guys comment on videos. Plus more guys see and comment on JP´s videos. So yeah, your assumption was correct. I´m a guy.

[@3omar3aysha]

Promiscuity just means lots of sexual partners, whether they do this by cheating or ethically is another matter. Most of you are using terms incorrectly

[@ares7521]

True, but they do corralte

[@edwardmccall8219]

Sounds like ms heard

[@mrdonut3382]

No dad

[@PR-qp8iz]

I found this somehow funny, but I am not sure why 🤔

[@godsbabeborn-again5945]

My ex whom I left because of promiscuity has now "moved on" and has a gf. I'm single. He still calls me very late at night to ask if he can come see me. I once told him that he says goodnight to his gf and pretends to sleep, after finishing that call with her, he calls me. That is some level of psychopathic behavior. It hurts me so much to realize exactly what he was doing to me because it can only be revelatory by what I see him doing to the current gf. He is selfish and parasitic. He has many of these big 5 traits if not all.

[@petal9547]

So this basically means that creative people shouldn't get married

[@alexcalvoimagery]

As someone who is low in agreeableness, super high in openness and extroversion and low in consciousness - I may be in trouble.

[@Kidkromechan]

Hyper Creative people are interesting to be around to hear about all their ideas and such but not good marriage partners I think. I have met some hyper-creative people and they never settle down because they get inspired by everything.

[@halleyjimenez7485]

It's just that we are more prone to get bored, not to be promiscuous. I'm a female adult high in openness and a virgin, also never had a romantic partner (yet I do get bored with people and seek novelty, I never violate my morals), but maybe an extrovert who is high in openness and low in conscientiousness is more likely to be promiscuous. Also morality and ethics are a factor.

[@immanuelcunt7296]

@@alexcalvoimagery Lol I have the same personality structure.

[@rachel4339]

@@alexcalvoimagery me too! Not great to find out after already getting married tbh 😬

[@rascallyrabbit]

Lack of a moral compass. Bad character. Weak self respect. Often because of child emotional neglect. But, one should grow up into a person of character.

[@Machame08]

JP’s obsessed with the word “conscientiousness”. Comes up in almost every video

[@wanttobeasage2952]

The big five personality traits are OCEAN Openness Extroversion Agreeableness Neuroticism If you map these traits and you include IQ then you can determine life outcome so it is a pretty big deal.

[@mrp6841]

Narcissism predicts promiscuity for sure!

[@tbobtbob330]

As usual, my personality traits and the relevant "life choices and characteristics" 180 degrees from what's normal.

[@elvenbae]

Thank God I'm not an extrovert!

[@brianboykin4965]

Yeah phew

[@jay-vaz9485]

Bane from the Dark Knight Rises introducing the video..nice

[@katara4955]

What are autistic like traits and why does that mean less likely to be promiscuous

[@slkjess1206]

My guess is lack of eye contact, difficulty communicating, "awkward" gestures/fidgets, etc.

[@callanc3925]

bc its hard to bang someone when you cant look them in the eyes or hold a conversation

[@Coastpsych_fi99]

@@slkjess1206 Nah I’m autistic and being around NT people is exhausting. I could go out but being out of my house is overstimulating, difficulties with foods, sounds/noise, understanding behaviour and when I’m in my room alone suddenly I don’t feel autistic. I never find it enjoyable like most people tbh.

[@ThousandMask]

I tempt to avoid promiscuous people for any sort of activities , no need to be disrespectful but its a good predictor of troubles and ego issues I think they need to work on themselves before engage in any serious project and even as friend they don’t make good company in my experience

[@eveillanderson]

heard a brilliant african proverb the other day 'he who marries a beautiful woman will have the same problem as the man who grows grapes by a buys road for the same reasons' and i'm reminded of the correlation in primates between female promiscuity and male genital size

[@Fiery154]

My agreeableness is my only saving grace 🙃

[@jannemclaughlin8436]

Where does pornography addiction fit on the promiscuity scale? (I have observed introversion and autistic traits go with the type of promiscuity that is porn use). Autism expresses in sexual extremes of asexual to hyper sexual.

[@Jacob-TX]

Pornography is habitual and is limited by being conscious of the evils that is inherent to it, prayer, and distracting ourselves from it when the urge hits. Pornography use is generally linked to the strength of libido, and getting regular sex likely won't help. Prayer does, getting involved in some other hobby does, and hanging out in crowded areas since most people won't masturbate if they're not alone.

[@myotherusername9224]

porn use is not promiscuity. promiscuity requires sexual contact between people's bodies, in person. porn is voyeurism and fantasy but not sexual *contact*.

[@cekmate20]

Porn is financial freedom, doubt if these promiscuous girls are willing do it for free.

[@novelacollection]

Porn use makes a person will and morals weaken and fade to nothing when presented with an opportunity. It makes it harder to live without being addicted to sex those who view it will eventually take part in what their viewing especially the violent perverse type of porn.

[@novelacollection]

@@myotherusername9224 Porn use is the pre-cursor to promiscuous behavior. So it is no contact but it’s like a gateway drug that has 100% efficacy. If that’s what someone is feeding their spirit and mind everyday they will act on it no doubt.

[@franko8572]

If they cheated on you, they’re going to cheat on you. Also, if you’re reading this and have to question if you’re spouse would cheat on you, they already have.

[@callanc3925]

its not the first time they cheated, its the first time you caught them

[@franko8572]

@@callanc3925 Yes, that! You know!

[@yosemite735]

PROMISCUITY- A word men came up with to say women are having sex that some men do not approve of. Usally because the men are not having the same amount of sex.

[@MJ-qb5ph]

Self hatred. Pain killer

[@snowyowlz5992]

Can this discussion which is good be put in understandable terms for average middle-schooler?

[@Avishek999cool]

How do i reference this work please?

[@rillo806]

That was the most sophisticated way ive ever heard someone basically say "most people are whores"

[@angelamurnane2334]

Sorry mate, but I am an introvert and bit aspie, and agreeable, and circumstances meant I worked evenings a lot for a long time, in a few different fields. Always an exception I guess. Who gets to determine levels of conscientiousness?

[@entpboss5285]

I'm an extroverted and highly disagreeable and I hate to work in the evenings. And evenings don't exist

[@juliettezea9507]

I like to work evenings so I can do my appointments and shopping during the day

[@dawnemile4974]

People hesitate to say that some people are wicked.

[@andulasis6283]

Where is the rest? It’s hella interesting

[@joshy0369]

Good stuff ☝ 👏 👍

[@dracomalar5629]

The greatest question that needs to be asked is: why is promiscuity wrong?

[@sonofhibbs4425]

Do you not have eyes to see the answer to that? It’s FUCKING PRETTY DARN OBVIOUS.

[@troyjollimore4100]

@@sonofhibbs4425 Besides Religuous basis… Please enlighten us!

[@sonofhibbs4425]

@@troyjollimore4100 ok. Here are some biggies: STDs. Unwanted pregnancies. Hormonal attachments (speaking of science here where there are actual bonding hormones released) Pretty much every social/economic problem can be traced to promiscuity. Sex is what creates babies and children need a stable home. This is science and not based on any religious whimsical idea. Promiscuity is not a good idea by any stretch.

[@troyjollimore4100]

@@sonofhibbs4425 Aside from the hormonal thing… which few seem to care about anymore… Aren’t all of those issues solved by using condoms? 🤔

[@I_am_Raziel]

If you have to ask you don't know anything.

[@cthulluchanhensel8936]

When He says "negative predictors of promiscuity" what he means?😅

[@Rojo1111]

predictors of someone not being promiscuous.

[@cthulluchanhensel8936]

@@Rojo1111 thx bro

[@lectrix8]

Negatively correlated, r

[@reyPiti]

The more you have of those traits the less likely you are of being promiscous

[@Amjbmcg]

So what does it mean? Those less likely to have sex?

[@papabird4425]

Availability, desire, and opportunity

[@slowbrodragon6951]

I didn't see this video of JP, thanks!

[@fintechip96]

Simple Answer: Media programming , culture and law

[@mike2143]

What’s the study he talks about?

[@joblakelisbon]

Being Jordan Peterson's daughter predicts promiscuity....

[@maayavulfe6365]

I came her to say this but I knew in my heart of hearts it had already been said lol

[@DrCognitive]

I'd like to see the whole lecture on this.

[@biffdanielson2820]

JP is so much fun.

[@Someones_account_haha]

What is neuroticism

[@rocker24super]

You are correct, but you are so correct that you have no idea how correct you actually are.

[@Raverraver9999]

Man is created to praise, reverence, and serve God our Lord, and by this means to save his soul. And the other things on the face of the earth are created for man and that they may help him in prosecuting the end for which he is created. From this it follows that man is to use them as much as they help him on to his end, and ought to rid himself of them so far as they hinder him as to it. For this it is necessary to make ourselves indifferent to all created things in all that is allowed to the choice of our free will and is not prohibited to it; so that, on our part, we want not health rather than sickness, riches rather than poverty,honor rather than dishonor, long rather than short life, and so in all the rest; desiring and choosing only what is most conducive for us to the end for which we are created.

[@susanwjoh0re735]

Nooo, your lord could be just an imaginary friend like santa claus

[@adityaruparel3320]

Wonderfully put.

[@krisweaver7524]

Speak for yourself.

[@charliefortin555]

Jordan please spend more time on the 3 standard deviations difference between men and women. That was a bit fast.

[@georgedecruz4717]

Choices. Simple answer.

[@alejandrodelabarra2838]

Promiscuity predicts people being alone and not trusting each other.

[@charlottekey8856]

Yeah, definitely. That's what it boils down to.

[@_lonelywolf]

What's the good of psychology if you're oversensitive?

[@dawnemile4974]

I don't believe the first premises. I am agreeable but not married so being at home in the evening did not mattee.

[@vanhattfield8292]

Something that can predict promescuity is suspecting and blaming your partner when there is absolutely know proof that they are, because it gets old very fast. It doesn't take long to realize that you are getting "punished" for something you are not doing by the person you love and is supposed to be loving you. That causes a crack in the relationship that allows anyone with a kind word and the ability to provide an ounce of comfort to enter and since you are already being blamed and catching heat for something you "weren't" doing ther eis no fear of getting caught because you have already withstood the storm. At least that is what I heard from my "friend"... 🙄

[@AliciaGuitar]

In a similar situation in my 20s i was tempted, since i had already "paid the price", but couldnt go through with it. I later found out he was PROJECTING and was actually cheating on me all along. Accusing an innocent partner is a HUGE red flag that they are already cheating. They WANT you to cheat because they think that justifies them.

[@redbear4027]

WOMEN.

[@oduvan2612]

I never felt the need to have multiple sex partners and it is difficult for me to understand women who do maybe because I never feel an instant attraction to men. I always need time to develop liking for someone, I can not imagine jumping right into bed with some stranger. If I'd be doing that, I would feel nothing at best, it will be mechanical and even disgusting at worst.

[@leej70]

Opposite for me. I can't understand how a man can have sex with just one partner for years on end.

[@lottedunnell4642]

🤣 An ad with Yumi played for me before this video. Sorry, but I stand with Jordan. Being overweight is seriously unhealthy. Can we please stop glamourising it.

[@mikebeard3110]

please keep doing this

[@Faz-Ahmed]

Described Amber heard 😂

[@samrapheal1828]

Exactamundo.

[@hotstixx]

I wonder what the point of all this is ?

[@davidthomspson9771]

A truth bomb clip....wow ..thank you

[@CybermanKing]

Why not just the video of him talking?

[@arkman2237]

I think im kinda screwed, 1 percentile in conscientiousness as well with extroversion, and very high in opennness , about 96 percentile and high also in neuroticsm, about 89 porcentile, to top that very high in agreeableness , about 92 percentile, can you guess what my life is like?

[@garciaerick898]

You're an absolute pushover who thinks they are screwed for life and defines their "being" by a test and not the choices they continue to make on a hourly-daily-weekly basis?

[@callanc3925]

where are you pulling these numbers from and why do you care enough to remember them

[@leonaj.5835]

@@callanc3925 he is high in neuroticism, this is bound to happen. Self-fulfilling prophesy.

[@callanc3925]

@@leonaj.5835 hahahah

[@myotherusername9224]

@@garciaerick898 Arkman 22 is only missing that piece of the puzzle you have just identified. this can be remedied with _Self Authoring_ or a similar program of self improvement

[@wandabanks6756]

Trying to work on a relationship; when they are doing the opposite. That might lead to a divorce

[@BlinJe]

Well that depends on what you mean by promiscuity, Mr Peterson.

[@tomasrpdepaiva9806]

Be the lobster.

[@margochanning6868]

One could ask what predicts any kind of addictive and compulsive behavior - ya know, like addiction to pain meds - even by an academic psychologist that claims to be a seasoned expert and authority and should know better.

[@joblakelisbon]

Yup - this guy is the biggest fraud on the internet. His daughter is a single mum who gets with guys like Andrew Tate lol....when Peterson's wife got cancer, his response was to go and get addicted to anti-depressants. And we're supposed to revere and listen to this guy.

[@SN00PICUS]

Nice passive aggressive swing at the Professor there lady, but it was an imbalance of benzos not opiates and not an abuse as they were used exactly as prescribed.

[@margochanning6868]

@@joblakelisbon He's a malignant narcissist and a pied piper playing false teacher. He tells lost boys to clean their room while his whole life is a trainwreck. Yet, look at his sycophant following. He can still rake in the big bucks just by singing his siren song to his ignorant, lost and blind devotees.

[@SuperBullyone]

So whats the point? A neurotic extrovert is your best chance for getting laid? With promiscuity does anyone think of the consequences? you might end up living in the camp ground of America. The other person might not go away. They might map out a life plan for you. A lot of things can go wrong.

[@MaxLechthaler]

What is the meaning of the numbers Dr. Peterson mentions in context with correlation?

[@suras8984]

I think it's standard deviation. Someone correct me if Im wrong. I took quantitative research methods well over a decade ago and this is what is coming to my mind lol.

[@johnmalcolm4822]

It is depressing to see channels that exploit Peterson's work for their own gain.

[@roddyboethius1722]

He doesn't care. He is making millions off his verbose quackery

[@thepoetandwit6513]

Who would not wish to stand on the shoulders of giants? Doctor Peterson learnt from many other people wiser than himself, do they complain?

[@johnmalcolm4822]

@@thepoetandwit6513 Poetic rationalizations are still rationalizations. A midget on the shoulders of a giant only looks smaller. This practice of putting cheap clickbait titles on serious deep work acquired at no cost is motivated by greed, not by a desire to be on the level of JP.

[@johnmalcolm4822]

@@roddyboethius1722 And you are robbing yourself by choosing to try to drag him down. If you want to quote some of his work and say where you differ and why, go ahead. If all you want to show the world is your jealousy and an ability to insult, just be aware thst that is what people see. Excellence ought to be rewarded because it is excellence that has produced so much that you benefit from despite your inability to match it. Don't try to drag down someone who offers to lift you up just because you don't think they deserve anything for their work. You have free access to it in any case.

[@roddyboethius1722]

@@johnmalcolm4822 oh God, you drone on just like Jordan

[@toddjohnson271]

Tattoo'ed women, nose rings...absent fathers. In guys......they are CHAD. Handsome, tall, wealthy to some degree.

[@I_am_Raziel]

Blue, green, purple hair.

[@underated17]

I am a mix of both