What Swirling Black Women Can Learn From Eboni K. Williams

[@xpnn]

It will benefit a lot of BW to just move in silence and don’t comment on anything publicly

[@missmack2328]

She should have just said..”maybe” or “idk”

[@limegreenlover21]

That’s what I do. I took Chrissie’s advice. I move in silence. I don’t comment on any black issues publicity or any political movements. I use social media for fun and leave my dating life offline.

[@shannonbarbie2023]

I agree I think black men should keep quiet as well especially when it come to they presence.

[@CallHerTJ]

I have mixed feelings about that. Letting it be known that you have standards changes the narrative & encourages other BW. However, what ALL BW need to do is stop trying to justify why they have those standards. Stop trying to go on black platforms to “explain” your stance to a community dedicated to misunderstanding you.

[@adrianaarthur]

It sure will 💯

[@LetThereBeLight1111]

I will work on giving back to black girls, I’m not fighting for my life for a community that says I deserve crumbs.

[@rabbiyah5]

Preach!

[@islandgirl8067]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@apricityventura2002]

I’m working on creating a makeup line for black girls.

[@Bobisworld]

@@apricityventura2002ooh nice! Do you have a name?

[@purpleflows5680]

I focus on Black girls and Black girls only.

[@charice1216]

BW, never let anyone shame you for having standards.

[@wildhearts242]

True. It’s just soo sad when I have this convo with my non black friends, it’s perfectly normal to want a man with a good career. Only in the black community is it taboo. Smh

[@charice1216]

@@wildhearts242 I really don’t understand it. Why is everyone else allowed to have standards but BW?

[@justcallmelola]

Also keep quiet about your standards. That's between you and the Lord!

[@charice1216]

@@justcallmelola yep exactly

[@melanatedcyb3rst4r]

@@justcallmelola 💯 Truly

[@mia.la.americana]

Swirl in silence. Disengage with Blackistan both on and offline. Take a more reserved, apolitical stance with these trending topics/politics. The headache that will otherwise ensue is not worth it. Move in silence and protect your peace 🌸

[@ShowBusiness-gf6qn]

Moving in silence is the goal 🤫

[@ajh.4131]

1000% 😌❤

[@dianasohn2515]

Blk wmn shouldn’t have to hide their partners if he’s white. These men are hypocrites they dare white n still “pro blk” so allow blk wmn to do what they want

[@tessy28]

I agree

[@libfuzzy4629]

Yep

[@really8704]

Black women, move in private and let them find out when the stats about marriage comes out 😂

[@ongoingsky9347]

Yes that’s what they’re not understanding. Bw try so hard to prove something when the truth speaks for itself.

[@rogerblewett5595]

@@ongoingsky9347 The stats say that black women are the least chosen for marriage.. I wonder why ? 🤔

[@thebadkids2320]

@@ongoingsky9347 and if bw actually pay attention the truth is coming out through non bw, they’re as well fed up with bm and the same crap bw were going through is now their experience

[@abkgg7]

Precisely!!!

[@gueundhrb1702]

@@thebadkids2320😂😂😂😂😂 the stats are out we don’t see anything

[@shewhowrites101]

I personally wouldn’t bank my selection of a Partner on what the Black community wants. The track record speaks for itself. And if I don’t want those same results, why listen?

[@racheltheodore7236]

I agree. 👍

[@noirefit5954]

Bingo

[@Blaquebarbgamer]

Say it louder 🗣️!

[@moormorebooks5103]

Iyanla’s track record….a lot of ppl in our community love to give advice but aren’t qualified. I like Iyanla’s work but she shouldn’t give relationship advice.

[@rogerblewett5595]

@Ceedy That's not what the data says about black women when it comes to dating 😆. Keep selling dreams though sis

[@bossytweed6664]

Its the telling us to choose better while simultaneously telling us we don't deserve better for me. They tell us not to expect a man to have success, high finances careers if we don't possess those things, but when we do possess those things we're masculine. Not long ago Eboni was a 10 to these men but now that they find out they don't meet her standards suddenly shes old and basic. You can't make this shit up!

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

That part! That's the biggest aspect of the hypocrisy in this whole situation. Black men tell black women to choose better men, while telling black women they aren't worthy of better men. If you end up with broke bum ass baby daddy it's because your standards were too low. But if you're seeking a financially stable husband your standards are too high.

[@Remember_the_Time]

I said the same thing when Envy spoke to her. Many bm actors, activists, Athletes etc talk black and sleep non-black. They do it often. It was also funny how Envy had the gall to say that with his non-black wife 🤣

[@__Selena__]

Is DJ Envy even black himself? Lmao that threw me for a loop 😂

[@mimi-rk2qu]

Envy is married so his opinion of a single woman’s dating choices is null and void. He is also mixed race and she fits in with his family of origin 😂😂😂

[@bubblybubbles4023]

I've noticed that the more pro-black a BM is the more likely it is that he doesn't date BW and if he does he only wants mixed or light skinned BW. I would advise BW to run from any BM that does a lot of pro-black talking.

[@Frugal637]

@@__Selena__ I don't think he is.

[@brownjaded]

@@__Selena__he’s just as black and accepted as Halle berry, Beyoncé or any other biracial.

[@GoaWay...]

Eboni should take a lesson from Eve, which is by staying out of the black issues stuff, and dropping the problack stuff. There is no such thing as problack anyway.

[@user-et2ng1qb2m]

Eve is *THE* role model. I don't want to hear it unless she's talking 😂

[@GoaWay...]

@@user-et2ng1qb2m ☺️

[@_gonna_renew_my_sinew]

Don’t forget about Tika Sumpter y’all!! Cmon now!! She definitely understands the assignment and keeps her commentary vague. Love it!!

[@GoaWay...]

@@_gonna_renew_my_sinew 👍😸

[@BlendedBarbieDoll]

Exactly. Eve a stripper turned rapper married to a billionaire who loves and respects her. Black men really want black Womens to think no one wants us…and they get so mad when they are proved wrong. Black Women are not the problem here.

[@Shannafai]

So my brother in law came over one time to visit, n halle Berry came on. He goes and says she love them white men. I had to said, true but so do u, u got 6 kids by a WW. He couldn't even formulate a proper sentence after that. Talking bout it's not the same thing.

[@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302]

6 kids by a WW but have the nerve to talk about Halle Berry divesting 😂

[@Shannafai]

@@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302 it was pointless to argue with bm like him. But that situation literally proves irl, that they truly don't see the hypocrisy they spew into the world regarding bw choices.

[@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302]

@@Shannafai exactly 💯 BM are some of the biggest hypocrites. I don't even waste my energy nor time talking/debating with them anymore. Let the nonbw/preferences deal with them.

[@joylove2781]

​@@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302And Halle Berry is biracial 🙄

[@Shannafai]

@Joy Love exactly, i stated that too.

[@MsYona901]

They all do it. Black men. Belefonte, Poitier, John Legend, Kanye, even Frederick Douglass.……All talk.

[@T.H-v4h]

Jamie fox

[@dnicole4236]

Yup lol

[@lizabetx483]

True but Frederick Douglass was mulatto.

[@Florenge777]

Seghor, most african présidents, Frantz Fanon, a lot of athletes.... Move on

[@DeLaTr0ll]

Clarence Thomas

[@zoradelaney9412]

Eboni K. Williams shouldn't have even tried to justify herself, with the pro-black talk after her "bus driver" comments. She should've replied with the "THAT'S MY PREFERENCE" (to not date broke men, to date white men...whether she sometimes or exclusively dates them) angle.

[@niratomas579]

I don’t know wtf it is but BW who date out really have a tendency of overcompensating and bmw🤦🏽‍♀️

[@krysjohnson9421]

No she was addressing the comments under her post. She actually she stated that but hey....yall will have different talking points

[@SistahZee]

I also wish she hadn't explained herself after the bus driver comment She should've just told everyone that she has a right to her personal choices. Period.

[@Natasha-kg1zw]

Agreed. No explanation needed. I would've left it at that....and I definitely wouldn't have gone on the breakfast club.

[@rogerblewett5595]

Didn't that white man she was engaged too leave her ?

[@CG-gp2gc]

I too use to "want to save my people", but I realized that my "people" did not and do not want to be saved! 🤔 So now, I do not care because "caring" was literally killing me! 😮‍💨 So now I am saving myself! 💃

[@Garglemymayo]

Same. The first step to solving a problem is admitting you have one and this community absolutely refuses to address the elephant in the room everyone else can see.

[@moormorebooks5103]

I recently decided that maybe a yr ago. Not just pertaining to Black men but Black women too. Our community…the mindset can be exhausting. Those of us who have healthy marriages, careers, etc can best lead by example. I also felt some relief when I figured out the real cause of our community not being able to unite and basically us hating each other…read Deuteronomy chapter 28. We fit the descriptions found there. Not any other group on planet earth. We’ve been lied to about our true identity and until we at least learn that we will always have these circular conversations.

[@CG-gp2gc]

@@Garglemymayo Very well said!

[@ccdluna]

Girl! I found me an African man. I was DONE with black men, but also done with the colonizer. 😂

[@ccleavemebe4790]

This is the truth

[@ASprinkleofAnime]

Seems like the black women who actually care about improving the community are moving on and giving up because it's a losing battle. I think Eboni can still speak to the black women who will listen and stay out of black male centered spaces.

[@kala5775]

I agree!

[@tiffanyyisrael7989]

I just told my mom I have gotten to the point of wanting nothing to do with black men, outside family. 🤷🏾‍♀️I'm tired of them and need my peace.

[@sakuralein1]

@@tiffanyyisrael7989SAME !!

[@dp1202]

@@tiffanyyisrael7989 me to

[@Blooming_Yonko]

All of you females are crazy. Black men are amazing. You all just go for the worst ones or the ones that everyone wants. Not saying you should go for a horrible-looking guy or lower your standards, but if you aren't careful you will all wake up and not see yourself in grandchildren. Just saying that jumping ship just because some kid broke your heart is telling. It's telling of weakness and impatience. I can hear it's echoes in the comments. It's deafening.

[@CallHerTJ]

The black community wouldn’t be dragging Da Brat & Eboni like they are if they didn’t fear them influencing other BW.

[@asiamae8734]

Mind you they are the same Blk ppl that don't even give AF about Blk lesbians, but yet they are mad that they chose a Yt man as a sperm donor? Pro blacks are literally the first ones to say that there is a gay agenda but are also trying to control what da brat does with her body.... They are INSANE!

[@babygirla5717]

Facts well they can’t influence me because I don’t care anything about the black bandits

[@paf2587]

The gag is that these lower status men don’t even have good character for the most part. So this community is just insane.

[@girl-gx2ls]

And will be the main ones to put you down, use you up and be physically, verbally, emotionally and financially abusive.

[@MyCurls_MyCrown]

That’s why they can’t get ahead…no principles.

[@Coco_xoxo]

Thank you! I come from a family of them. They’re not walking around with hearts of gold most of the time. Still cheating, still abusive, still dusty.

[@BubblyRosé2468]

Exactly! They want bw to choose "high quality men" but they don't even fit THAT criteria. Smh

[@ATLAXTA]

🎶 Don’t save them!! They don’t wanna be saved!!🎶 Free yourselves from the shackles of pro-blackness, ladies!! Pro-black only equals pro-black MEN to these mayles & their pickmes. Worry about yourself & do what’s best for you at all times!! 🙏🏾

[@applespears4045]

You don’t have to announce standards. Just set them and move accordingly. Especially if you know how our community is going to just gaslight you. Bw don’t have the same luxury as bm to “date yt & speak black” unfortunately we are held to a higher standard so just move accordingly. Overall being upset over anyone’s standards is WEIRD! 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@X3N14]

Only Black people would believe having black babies in poverty and mediocrity is better than having mixed children in a more financially affluent or stable household. If I’m getting married and having children, I’m not gonna be promoting struggle love so his character (including emotional intelligence and relationship skills) and finances are way more important than the color of his skin. How are Black men as a whole uplifting and improving the situation of the Black community?!

[@Coco_xoxo]

I’m trying to figure out, what sense does it make to bring children here who will already have a disadvantage due to their skin color and give them absolutely no financial support? I see why we have no wealth.

[@libfuzzy4629]

Bingooo

[@theeladyj]

I agree

[@mohamedsaid9416]

@@theeladyjnot necessarily black nuclear family is important to keeping black generational wealth if u marry out and divorce “they” can take your wealth

[@ThePltsweet]

​@@mohamedsaid9416how is the black American community keeping wealth when most bm who get/are rich marry out? 😂. Bw, continue keeping your options open.

[@aao2780]

Young black women be wearing of older black women…a lot of them grew up in Blackistan and have adopted Mammyism so there ideology and identity is 100% black male identified.

[@Coco_xoxo]

I agree. Just because someone is an older doesn’t make them an elder. They can go through life experiences and still lack wisdom.

[@Ducky190]

The Black men that are complaining are only doing so because she is a preference that doesn't prefer them. I wish Eboni as outspoken as she can be would have stayed silent on this one. Especially when bringing pro blackness into the conversation to try and save grace. She could have pulled a Beyonce or Lori, Harvey say nothing, and keep doing her .

[@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302]

The exact same thing I said BM are just mad because she is preference that don't like them. If she was a non preference they wanted even care/be pressed.

[@Bobisworld]

I totally agree and have commented the same. They feel rejected by someone who they would have chosen. Oh well

[@amab1853]

Facts!! That is absolutely true. They are outraged with Eboni because she is a preference that doesn't prefer them

[@T.H-v4h]

I don't mind her putting them in their place 😌

[@takyrica]

I totally agree with Eboni. I think most people are being basic with attempting to understand what she meant. I’m out of the “pro black” camp as I am married to a non-black. I bet Eboni will give up soon enough.

[@MsElizaRae]

Congratz on your marriage! Wishing yall many years of happiness 💕

[@deejay1216]

Me too! Non-black king👍👍

[@mimi-rk2qu]

Congratulations beauty!!!! My husband is biracial and l’m mixed race. Life is so sweet with him. I never wanted a BM because they’re problematic it seems unless you hit the lottery or something!!

[@dianasohn2515]

Pro blk wmn only!

[@rogerblewett5595]

Uhhh eboni is not "pro black" .. she is a fraud and a gold digger who was also exposed for being engaged to a white man and even he got tired of her ass and left 😆

[@niablee]

This is EXACTLY why I say I’m pro Black WOMEN 👏🏾

[@chanettelaing4664]

@Joey Muluba i like that pro truth

[@brandnew9834]

I’m not with any double standards. BW have just as much a right to date out as BM.

[@racheltheodore7236]

I agree. 😊

[@MsElizaRae]

Facts! Keep the same energy~

[@Tee-Star]

The most meaningful commentary on this issue: Black Women should stand back, and upgrade in silence.❤

[@zerotolerance2026]

You nailed it!👏🏾👏🏾

[@malcolmx8082]

What do you mean by upgrade.

[@inmyoffice]

Exactly, that's what I'm doing. Upgrading in silence 🥰

[@Tee-Star]

@@malcolmx8082 Focus on men,Pls. This conversation is 4 women, ONLY.

[@AlexaGoldSoul]

BM who dated or married non-Black women: Jonathan Majors. Quincy Jones. Nick Cannon. Byron Allen. Kanye West. James Brown. Michael Jordan. Eddie Murphy. Neil DeGrasse Tyson. Big Sean. Travis Scott. Omari Hardwick. And that’s off the top of my head!! But I know there’s plenty more!! The hypocrisy of Black men when it pertains to BW’s dating choices is so ridiculous and absurd it’s almost comical!!! 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@guitarstrings8136]

You who really baffles me? W.Kamal Bell. One of his shows was on mega churches sooo to make a one hour eppy short .. he spoke at length about how it’s important for him to have a black pastor because of the culture, experience, understanding, solidarity etc So, I’m thinking, it’s interesting how he didn’t apply that same philosophy to choosing a mate.

[@justme23love13]

Don't forget Cuban Gooding Jr, Tiger Woods, Derrick Rose, Kobe Bryant, Michael Jackson and Some of the Jackson Brothers, list goes on

[@keyfield8967]

The Williams sister Serena and Venus, Naomi Campbell, Whoopi, Marian Edelman Wright plus many more "swimming in the milk" as the great Dr. Umar Johnson so eloquently and succinctly put it- you don't want to broach that area Goldie...

[@faa1412]

@@keyfield8967 Yeah but black men can be found getting with white women back to 1619 and even in Africa. So it all started with BM.

[@AlexaGoldSoul]

@@keyfield8967: let’s go there shall we?! 😏 My point wasn’t to list these men and shame them for their preferences/choices. My point was, DJ Envy (of the breakfast club) had the audacity to question Eboni (K. Williams) of her dedication and work on behalf of the Black community b/c she dated non-BM but…there are so many BM through recent history in activism, education and entertainment that have proclaimed themselves Pro-Black but dated/married (mostly) White women. At the end of the day, I don’t care who you date but…the hypocrisy of it all rings insanely loud!

[@melaninpink92]

Men who date out aren't pro black they are pro black men. That's what black woman should be when dating out. Be pro black woman be for the betterment of black woman. Let the black men do them as they always done.

[@libfuzzy4629]

Yep

[@mooncat4376]

Tbh, I dont think it's possible for bw to really benefit from the blk community bc there's no real LONG TERM benefit. Not only bc of the abuse which is bad enough, but frankly, blk ppl (especially the hoteps lol) aren't good at taking real action and *long-term* strategy. I'm taking 20, 30, 50 years and beyond. Where's that school Umar J. has been promising?😅 The same applies for bw artists like Chloe and Normani. Months ago, Chrissie talked about them having to work with CB and there still hasn't been any real return on that investment (bc lets be real, he unfortunately does represent/reflect a significant chunk of blk culture/ppl). The "community" is not invested in blk women and girls, simple as that.

[@kantik2118]

Because the BC is using BW to build UP their narcissistic BM to replace the white master in his bed with his WW. It was Never about black Queens and black Kings. But Always about Black Kangs AND black Kangs. BW are only a tool for them.

[@babygirla5717]

Yep nothing but facts

[@tiredoftheworld4834]

Yes. I used to listen to rap music before. I actually listened to on black woman artist early on in her career and she was promising and had some intelligent songs. I noticed that for bw rappers, they are supported by the community when they do more s*xually crazy performances. Anything with intelligence and prose from a bw is not supported. Drake can come out with bum songs and people still support him just as hard. And I know drake is biracial and Canadian but he only became popular because he played into the “black culture”.

[@phrelephant]

Now I will further support this woman by buying her book! Lol.

[@guinealove3744]

Yes! I ordered 2 copies. Gonna send one to my Swiss "sis". She ran into a crusty, rusty BAM and was totally confused by their interaction. She, by the way makes a great salary . I think he was a bit intimidated.

[@kylia2009]

I bought it too

[@jamdoll8660]

Mine just arrived today. Beautiful cover.

[@Blaquebarbgamer]

She has one called Pretty Powerful too. I’m listening to that Audible, she narrated it.

[@RukiaBlackBlazer]

*"Standing ovation, Chrissie's back...!"* These are the logic rational arguments of black women that black males will never reply too.

[@msrhonda4305]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾Thank you for articulating the hypocrisy so clearly, Chrissie!

[@brownbeauty8578]

Yuuuup! 🎉

[@lmusima3275]

The men don’t move in silence at all. They are posting their dusty passports bro experiences everywhere, digging at BW in an immature manner. We shouldn’t be like them.

[@starwoodanime1532]

When black women are happy that's when people are turned off. The truth is black women are human and deserve happiness just like EVERYBODY ELSE.

[@Jahlelal]

Yep, fuck non-black women and dusties.

[@inmyoffice]

Exactly, I have noticed that soo many times 😐

[@Perspectivesbyme]

You are 100% right Chrissie, let’s focus on us black women and ignore those hypocrites and their plight.

[@marissawilson4644]

My biggest question is: If black women are not their preference... Why do they care what her standards are? I'll wait.

[@allcityblks]

You are projecting based on a selected few. Stop it. 🤷🏿‍♂️

[@justme2272]

Bw don't needta be race loyal.

[@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302]

Nope not at all. My aunt talking about she still hoping for a chocolate black man. 🙄 I told her keep wishing and waiting I will be with a sexy Enrique Yun or Hassan.

[@davedave3236]

GO TO TUNISIA AND SEE HOW THE ARABS TREAT YOU

[@really8704]

@@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302 amen , #leavetyronesinthedust 🙏🏾

[@lashondarochell7584]

Not at all I go where I am celebrated and it's not with Black Men

[@rabbiyah5]

I sure ain’t and neither is my mama

[@jessicarabbit439]

Black woman should stop being social justice warriors especially for the black collective. Donate to causes anonmously. Lead by example. Help bg/bw who have taking steps to enlighten themselves point her in the right direction and the rabbit hole she will fall.

[@Nihdem]

When they get to Eboni’s level, they are too good for BW they are qualified for Backy and no one dares say anything about them having standards and preference. Now successful BW won’t date average the world is upside down.😂

[@MrsBerry-of3lr]

This!☝️

[@AnonyMous-lh3cm]

The moment DJ Envy said “wasn’t your fiancé a White Man?” She should’ve immediately clapped back “Yes, he was as White as YOUR MOTHER is”. And she should’ve left it at that. She let a non black man get offended in behalf of black men for a general comment she made that didn’t directly involve Black Men at all💁🏽‍♀️

[@jacquelinef7174]

I swirl and move in silence . Eboni needs to pump her brakes on the SJW stuff. It's not going to do her much good. BM are gonna be on the attack , regardless. I had a discussion with a friend on this Eboni /Iyanla situation . Of course, she seemed to side with her boyfriend (BM) at first, until I brought up good points about BW having standards and shouldn't be shamed for it. Her man only mentioned to her about Eboni's white ex. and nothing about what Iyanla said. She didn't even all of the info on the topic. Smh

[@yolandacleare6709]

Eboni needs to stop being concern about black men and only focus on the upliftment of black women.

[@joe2k20]

Make more black women in luxury content please

[@johannap7061]

Right add Billy Carson and Professor Griff to that "Im pro blk, the ancient ancestors were blackity blk but I got another race of woman to that list.

[@Garglemymayo]

Damn I didn't know about Professor Griff lol

[@sweetpeaj1952]

​@Crypta yep. He's like this😂

[@syncopation0]

Last I heard of him he was with some woman named Sole or hotep sounding BS name like that. She was an ex of Ginuwine.

[@BlakeGildaphish76]

i have been hearing people say that Eboni gives off masculine energy, but i just don't see/feel it. She really just seems assertive and decisive.

[@bluphirre]

Well said Chrissie! I honestly did not understand why Eboni went on the breakfast club, a show that facilitates and encourages the most degenerate behavior in the BC. But it makes sense when she has aligned her career with SJW type of work in said community. As a BW, it is detrimental to tie your professional life and especially depend financially on the BC. I hope Eboni’s current crisis is a learning opportunity.

[@SakFifthAve63]

There is nothing wrong with being elitist, I have never dated down and alway dated out and I married out and up. I know for damn sure my husband and I will make sure our children date within their class🤷🏽‍♀️

[@LeafInTheWind88]

That’s what one of my older cousins did. She married out and up and had all her babies in her early 40’s.

[@Mloveblacque_always]

This is the reason why I felt no ways when Harry Belonfante passed away

[@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302]

I didn't either and I don't give a damn about Jamie Foxx either let his Becky's pray for him.

[@pajdesign]

And it will be the same for Quincy Jones, James Earl Jones, Cornel West etc., etc., etc.

[@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302]

​@@pajdesign facts 💯

[@kala5775]

Wow so true!

[@yourmotherhatesyou641]

Finding out what he said about Eartha Kitt was enough for me. I wonder back then what BP thought because he should’ve been done after that

[@Flower.Power.1996]

I have a video idea Chrissie. You should have a panel discussion with the daughters of dusties and high value men to really talk about the outcomes of these hypogamous relationships. I would happily join.

[@DarlingEbony]

You are correct! 100% I had to learn this lesson too. There is no productive conversation that can be had from a group of men who do not take accountability and a community that coddles them.

[@toniemorrison4263]

Great video with excellent points. I wish Eboni had asked Iyanla to explain what she meant when she said our standards for men were wrong, "Based on who we are as women." Who does Iyanla think we are as women? Was she calling bw trash or low tier women who have no right to successful men? It sounds like it. Nobody discussed this part or called Iyanla out on this, and If that's what the blk community thinks of bw then what's the point ? Like what are we even doing here...?

[@Wanjiro81]

Thank you! I thought I was the only one who was perplexed by that statement!

[@joylove2781]

Unfortunately, I think a sizeable portion of the Black community sees us as inferior to other races of women. That's why some are constantly saying no other races of men want us.

[@iclickedbecauseiamtiredofs4630]

THIS KUNT TREE IS NOT OUR HOME!!! 🙅‍♀️🙅‍♂️🙅

[@libfuzzy4629]

​@@joylove2781they have such low self esteem it's sad!!!

[@oldaccount930]

This seems one-sided. Yeah, Eboni K put her thorns out but, she was defending herself from the micro agressions. Eboni K Williams is the sage. She might have trouble accessing her sensitivity/getting out of her head, but she, for damn sure, has the feminine gift of clarity, self-mastery, and wisdom.

[@charissehill2354]

I’ve taken myself out of this community dynamics bullshit because it’s toxic and full of vitriol for black women, especially dark skinned black women. Im a preschool teacher at a non profit preschool who caters to ppl who have been homeless. I have witnessed black who have been abused physically, who’s partners have given them HIV, who’s partners have abandoned them, etc… My dedication is to improve the lives of black women who want to do better for themselves and their children

[@libfuzzy4629]

Emphasis on those who want to do better!

[@4u2cre8]

I don't understand why people are so focussed on her failed relationship. So what? Not every non-black man you date is going to be the one. If not then just date another one. Men such as Kanye and Tiger W. have had multiple failed relationships/marriages with their "preferences" and no one cares, but of course, there's always a double standard when it comes to BW. 🙄

[@enigma7310]

*Despite this being a serious controversial topic i just want to say that thumbnail was mad clever!* 😂😂😂👌

[@Flower.Power.1996]

I have opened myself to interracially dating recently. I have you to thank Chrissie for helping me come to some hard conclusions about the black community or lack thereof. However, I notice when black women date interracially, I feel like we are still obsessed with the validation of the community. I don't understand how the moniker of pro black contributes to our lives, we will argue someone down about being considered pro black. We should be vested in multi-culturalism and the byproduct of that is that black people benefit. We need to let it go.

[@mikebike1715]

I'm mixed and I would say that's not true at all most of these non black people do not like blacks. So kissing their a**. Doesn't stop anythiname a definite doesn't help because they will just take all the benefits that n****** have worked for themselves. And trust me none of these non black people believe in multiculturalism.

[@jayyy735]

I agree. Unfortunately I feel like when we date out and seek validation it’s bc we see the men in our community date out all the time and receive validation and the hypocrisy angers us and drives us to want the same validation.

[@Flower.Power.1996]

@@jayyy735 Thats more than fair. But we make the mistake of seeking the validation of a community that is wholly morally, physically, mentally and financially unstable. We must have more self esteem.

[@jayyy735]

@@Flower.Power.1996 yup. I wholeheartedly agree. Im still on my journey with that but its getting better. I swear we need a support group for BW dating out lol bc its a very…unique experience.

[@joeycognition8824]

Exactly by how much has multiculturalism benefit black Americans? I’m all for black people dating out but as you say it’s pointless to argue about pro blackness the moment you marry someone that isn’t black. There is no point In black Americans investing in multiculturalism, that hasn’t done much for them. So just do it for you yourself, otherwise you’ll sound like the stereotypical white person who says “I don’t see color” as you say just let it go. But don’t pick the progressive cape white folks love seeing black women do that it’s why they’ve always been the democrat poster child aka foot soldiers…

[@Natasha-kg1zw]

I absolutely agree with this video. The mixed messages and the hypocrisy is ridiculous. That's why when I hear them talk it goes in one ear and out of the other.

[@charliebslilgurl1132]

Baby girl. EBONI K. just stop talking/explaining. You said what you said. Now move in silence about this subject.

[@TomikaKelly]

🤔We can say that her masculine demeanor and personality is what is hindering her from attracting the men she wants, but her personality and demeanor is also what helped her become a millionaire, lawyer, author, entrepreneur, commentator, and speaker. Without her personality she mightve become just another fry cook at Bojangles.

[@niratomas579]

With a little guidance/ coaching, she can do a complete 360 in that department! She has the funds to invest in herself in that manner! Hope she seizes the opportunity to do so!

[@gwendolynallen3218]

No we can't because I personally know powerful men absolutely love black women like her. It's only black men who find her masculine and think something is wrong with her personality. Men with money, self esteem and social status want wives like her. Black men don't have power, self esteem and status so all of this intimate them.

[@Mmeme2023]

She's worth $3 million! Women with 10x her net worth exist by thousands and many of the famous one aren't masculine. You don't have to be a hard angry fight-mode woman to get a law degree

[@Marjani1968]

Excellent approach! Black women please live your life!!!

[@addingupto1002]

Yes, the black community is so hypothetical. This is particularly true with BM; it has been this way decades. Excellent Vedio!

[@ajh.4131]

You mean hypocritical, right?

[@addingupto1002]

@AJ H. Yes, the word came up when I was trying to spell it out and I just glabed the first one that came up without checking it thoroughly to see if it was the right word.

[@imetaboyiusedtoknow8308]

What happened to the passport movement? Have all of the desired woman countries blocked Spiritavious?

[@bgm-anewme9911]

🤣🤣🤣😭😭🤧

[@dianasohn2515]

They changed their name to bros abroad n trying to “move quieter” but they still there

[@durgalakshmi2793]

Why are they so press about eboni yet they do not like us?

[@madameree8292]

​@@durgalakshmi2793 They are pressed about Eboni saying what she said because she phenotypically is the type of black woman they would want. Notice they did the same thing when Halle Berry started dating white men and when Meghan Markle married Prince Harry.

[@durgalakshmi2793]

@madameree8292 exactly mad that their preference don't find them attrative such as Stacey dash!!! I can careless if eboni jumps from one white man to another.

[@kjm485]

This needs to go viral!

[@justme2272]

Envy tricks of on his non bw and whomeva....he's mad cause it sounds like he wanna creep with an educated bw 😂. Pressed. His wife should be embarrassed buh she's not.

[@virgomoonchild79]

The HotepTundes' are faker than a 3 dollar bill..

[@shhhperry9852]

Iyanla has been giving closeted lesbian for 20+ years…

[@thetruesoulofanaquarius9302]

Bloop this tho 💯

[@hiddenbeauty2828]

She does give me that vibe as well.

[@marissawilson4644]

The backlash she received is hypocritical. The manosphere literally has a laundry list of requirements when all she asked for was her equal.

[@reginacameron3011]

I catch so much heat from friends b/c I have washed my hands of the BC. I care about my well being and what is best for me. I tell you what I feel so good and less stressed out. If BM don't give a heck about the BC then why should we as BW care. Ladies its 2023 let's due us and separate from the BM and this pro- black shit.

[@TracyDD]

I think the number 1 rule for women who want to level up is to MOVE IN SILENCE !!! No matters what we say or do, we're judge.

[@gemmat.2062]

The Grio is owned by Allen media group as in Byron Allen a BM who is married to a whole white woman. You can’t make this stuff up.

[@lmusima3275]

Iyanla comes from a generation of struggle love and BM worship. She states BW standards are too high. Ebony was right to respond the way she did. But I’m now thinking that she could have kept it brief or refused to elaborate.

[@Igbobabexoxo]

Eboni’s issue is she never divested.. completely. She’s still concerned with people who aren’t concerned with her and want to see her downfall.

[@libfuzzy4629]

Yep

[@greenytaddict]

Look at this @3:51 bw, this is what they truly want and to keep down. Bw will still try to contribute to their community while BM pander and fake their love for the black community.

[@SGzCMH]

Chrissie, just to add I watchrd the entire 1st interview with Eboni and Ms. Iyanla and I realized that Ms. Iyanla said she would date and possibly marry a bus driver because of his good character and the way he treats his mama, BUT did you hear the part where she slipped in would have to sign a prenup? Wait, if Ms. Iyanla really feels that love is what should truly matter why does she want to PROTECT her assets...? 🤔 I think this comment went over many people's heads. 💯

[@bloop4196]

Dj envy is literally mixed. Why is he even speaking 😭

[@Marley4everable]

All of this.🎯

[@TheeMrsGrinch]

That's Eboni's biggest problem. She's investing in black men instead of just black women.

[@Jwa-fo6nb]

And black little girls

[@TheeMrsGrinch]

@@Jwa-fo6nb exactly. BM and BB's are coddled from birth. BG's are shitted on from birth.

[@yolandamarka1719]

I'm here for the tea Chrissie

[@tvdavis]

“Date better men!” “Lower your standards!” Make it make sense! Where are all of these wonderful BM that want BW, that make less money but also aren’t dusty?

[@nubeazul5963]

The long term cost benefit on choosing a black male as a partner is just not there statistically. Looking at all these reports on education, earnings, marriage and divorce rates, life expectancy, quality of life etc they should be bending over backwards to secure a mate. Not the other way around.

[@libfuzzy4629]

Because mammies exist they don't care

[@sakuralein1]

Yesss🔥 love form germany ❤

[@mstiff321]

Their hypocrisy makes me hate them 🤬…

[@_gonna_renew_my_sinew]

Like I said on your live- the only thing she should’ve said after “if he owns the bus” Is “I said what I said”. She really disappointed me with all the explaining.

[@thinkinginn7443]

I recognize that if I never opened my options to include dating non-black men, my dating experience up to this point would’ve been much bleaker than it is now. I would’ve most likely developed a scarcity mindset and had an even greater tolerance for piss poor behavior and treatment. I also realize just how heated BM get when or if they discover I don’t limit my options to just them. It’s definitely less to do with ‘not being pro-black’ (despite my contributions to the community), it’s clearly the ‘concern’ that they won’t be able to use me or have access to me easily. Because think about it, if the majority of BM treat BW poorly in dating and they know you exclusively date BM, where’s the competition? Even if you’re ‘dating’ multiple dusties and cheapskates, chances are you aren’t dating ‘better’. So to them, regardless of how they treat you, you’re probably getting the same response from the other men anyway. But other non-blk men being thrown into the roster spooks them. Sure, dustiness comes in all races, but the chances that all those men are treating you poorly is slimmer because non-blk men are more likely to adopt and implement the behaviors in dating most women expect. And they also have a chance to not change that behavior just because they’re dating a BW. That’s actual competition that they either cannot, or do not, want to compete with. They don’t want to work to win you over, you’re ‘supposed’ to be a given deal Barbara the Builder candidate they put on standby to be their current or past Come Up woman. They want you to choose better but they usually mean choosing better out of their crappy pickings.

[@libfuzzy4629]

Bingo

[@ca678.4]

Everything you said is 100% facts. They say you are the problem but get scared and angry when you leave. Why? Their lack of access to you when you refuse to date them and in turn date better is the reason. I’ve had a black guy I know get angry/ offended at the thought that I would be interested in non-black men. The kicker? He had never been with a black woman before. He doesn’t even have much black female friends to begin with. All were black men and other races. Only been around other non black women. I was probably one of the only few he has been in such close proximity to, “friends” wise. This took me by surprise because, if you regularly date out, why would or should I be limited to you because we are the same race? Rules for thee but not for me type shit. He was also keen on letting me know that “ black women have to be really really pretty for a white guy to want to approach her” which I found especially strange. He didn’t even see that he was discounting my blackness, like some racist people do to black people as a whole. Then basically asked me if other races of men approached me. (Basically trying to gauge my attractiveness as a black woman on my experience with non black men. Isn’t that CRAZY?) I pointed out that I’ve seen and know many black women with white / non black spouses and his last thing said was “WELL I don’t see it so it can’t really be true” 🙄

[@Sharifay.]

Eboni was slick with it. that’s how you do it.😂

[@GlamorGrowthTravelwithMica]

I will support her by buying her BOOK!!! That is how we help her.

[@Moon11067]

I stopped being problack decades ago. I could give a hoot about bm.

[@wanderlustxx3]

I feel like she low key messed up her gig with the real housewives doing this type of pro black stuff as well. It was just the wrong place wrong crowd type of thing, I felt like she should have taken a page out of garcelles book. Once the pro black academia got her where she needed to be, she should have taken another route.

[@checksandthecity2669]

HELP! I could really use advice from you ladies on a similar issue that’s arisen. I started a nonprofit to teach young black girls about financial literacy and fitness. Everyyyyy black person i talk to about it only asks why black boys are included. I answer that I think coed classes are distracting and as a black woman i want it to be for my image. Although the majority of the young girls are black, i did not exclude any other races so we have white girls and Spanish girls as well. I have no support from the black conmunity for this reason but have been gifted ten of thousands in the first year from some wealthy families with foundations, all white of course. I have a great partner that is a white man and he loves the girls and encourages this passion project. Can you all comment on this situation and let me know if you think I should be moving any differently? I am not in the trenches and it’s not something I talk about all day and I don’t ever want to get bogged down in it. I’m a housewife so this is a project I run for fun and I have others I’m working on that aren’t related to the black community. Please let me know if I am swimming in the same dangerous waters Eboni is in.

[@niablee]

I would say keep GOING 👏🏾 However, if it does become stressful, maybe look to hiring some an assistant or two so you don’t always have to be the on the frontlines answering questions and such. Keep focused on the mission and vision of empowering Black girls and women!

[@BackStreetChippets]

You’re doing great! I wish I had a program like this growing up. Keep it exclusive to girls.

[@negracaribena]

I just finished your other video! Thanks for the new one!

[@levelup5100]

Seriously! It feels like a treat! Looking forward to paying for her content on her webpage ❤

[@gabbysch2625]

I'm team Eboni!

[@racheltheodore7236]

Me too. 🎉

[@memebzk5001]

Iyanla had her own agenda, I believe she seized the opportunity for clicks, views. This controversy got more traffic to her channel.. She just needed to destroy another BW to do it..

[@Jahlelal]

Yep, a lot of older black women, especially baby boomers, are trash to young black women like me to to bitterness and jealously, fuxk them trfling bitches.

[@ebbiemusumali8301]

Now I know why she had that little incident with Oprah

[@annmariegood37]

Chrissy as always you nailed it and BW just needs to concentrate on themselves

[@bghrfc2411]

The black that got offended are the ones I have multiple kids nothing going on for themselves, cheaters hypocrites, and they humiliate themselves.

[@Kiara-xh3he]

Thank you Chrissie, the message was 100% the truth. Women, should NEVER date down. We carry babies, we were designed to date men that can give us resources, it was survival.

[@HashiraTengen]

I just bought her book.😂

[@ToLovelyJesus]

Chrissie, I owe you an apology. When I heard your videos years ago about burning the pro-Black cape, I thought that you were being harsh and I didn’t agree. However, life has taught me that many Black men, even the “good” ones, don’t care at all about the misogyny that Black women face, how it cripples us, our mortality, or anything. I’ve spent years being loyal to a community that will plainly tell me that they don’t care about what affects me. As you stated, Black men will use us to advocate for them and then resent us for being masculine, even though they benefited from that masculine strength. Deep down inside, I still love Black people and I’m hoping for the best, but I can no longer have an overly-vocal role in the advancement of the Black community. Any pro-Blackness that I still have is basically reserved for the members of my household. I’ve also come to learn that my good husband is an exception.

[@jada43226]

Black men all have the same pathology

[@MrsBerry-of3lr]

Most of them do, and that's a problem.

[@RampagingChipmunk]

Wow this is probably the largest number of butthurt comments I’ve seen in a Chrissie comment section. Clearly she has touched on a sore spot. 😄

[@Hintedbymarina]

BEAUTIFULLY ARTICULATED from start to finish!

[@notforthebullshit5465]

You are preaching sista👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@erowry22]

They say do better, then when you do just that...its a crime. Anyway, what yall eating for dinner. I have smoked turkey wings.