When Average at Best Men Get a Taste of their Own Medicine - Eboni K. Williams & Iyanla Vanzant

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

In the "black community" it's okay to tell a black woman she's too average-looking to qualify for a wealthy husband, but it's considered elitist to tell a black man he's too average earning to qualify for a beautiful and wealthy wife.

[@niax782]

Yep 🎯

[@ryanyoung9202]

Jane Do-Re-Mi - EXACTLY ✅🎯👏💯🤔

[@garnetbabe2.0godschild40]

Double standard SMH

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

​@@garnetbabe2.0godschild40 yes, it's a double standard that serves to boost the ego of black men, while simultaneously lowering the self-esteem (and therefore standards) of black women.

[@nicole.s2652]

And that's why bw should tell them the same when he trying to move in her home use and mooch off of her start telling them they can't help u or add to your life. These dudes be settling and me as a dsbw is not going for it especially the one's who try to come around after that woman done used him up hell no bm is way too arrogant i start too turn them down now they have bad intentions.

[@namena7300]

BW: *Gets with a man for his potential because society conditions her to “give a brother a chance”* BM with potential: *turns out to be a dusty* Other BM: You can’t blame anyone but yourself, you should have chose better. BW: Ok, I’m only going to date BM on my level or higher. BM: How dare you degrade the average working class BM? You’re classist and elitist. Bottom line, BW, raise your standards and keep them high. Stop taking advice from these average at best earners.

[@malikawilson7071]

@Name N/A Basically 😂 date on your LEVEL OR LEVEL UP.

[@niax782]

🎯🎯🎯

[@dianasohn2515]

Bm love to contradict themselves they say whatever fit their narrative at the moment

[@dewyqueen9583]

High as giraffe pu**ey 😂

[@nicole.s2652]

It was a man on another video saying why want that bw give her man the potential and buy the bus so he can be the millionaire she is. Isn’t that the problem bandit bw buying bm don’t ever do that Bs ladies stop speaking life and giving potential to these dudes no matter what they always need help the nerve of that man made them look just like what they are users.

[@jamiew.6606]

Only 15 minutes in so this might be brought up later, but Eboni literally didn't even mention BM!! All she said is she wouldn't date a bus driver. The fact black men always get defensive when discussing lower-class positions says A LOT about where they stand in society. They loveeee telling on themselves lmao! It's pure comedy.

[@kemi1486]

That was my exact thoughts. Eboni even prefaced the question with Iyanla by saying she dates across the spectrum so why BM took up her rejection of dating a hypothetical bus driver is beyond me. I guess only BM are bus drivers 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@mekichey129]

BM see Eboni as the trophy no matter her age. When she states her criteria their souls were crushed and they don't know how to handle rejection. Especially if more BW have standards.

[@Undrconst]

LMAO she didn’t even mention BM specifically? That’s crazy.

[@naiya.nicole__]

Because a lot of them are bus drivers. Whenever I’ve had a bus driver ( mega bus, city transit, or school transit - they’ve been black . Black Women typically are school drivers because of maternal instincts to deal with children. But mega and city transit drivers are black men. Rarely ever seen white bus drivers .) Even the ones who take the bus are black men. Economically they’re not up within the socioeconomic spectrum and they know it. My ex was a black 6 figure earner who thought he was the prize because of his status - I slaughtered that cause I explained yeah you’re high in value but low quality because you still think like a poverty minded dusty black man. And ended things. Killed his ego and nobody wanted him despite him being attractive and good earner his attitude, how he treated service workers, was stingy, and just bad moral devalued him.

[@MysteriousVirScorpio]

Best comment! I noticed that too! 😂

[@malikawilson7071]

Bottom line is: BLACK WOMEN GOT STANDARDS AND THE WORLD GOT MAD😂 telling a tv host, author, lawyer who worked hard, passed the bar and acquired wealth to DATE DOWN actually is pathetic. It goes to show the VESTED interest people have in keep black women POOR and SETTLING in particular black men. BW keep your STANDARDS UP!

[@hollyjames.]

Spot on, and Iyanla is super disgusting for using her influence in this way. I can't believe I used to like her. She reminded me of my granny. How dangerous.

[@kittensmitten3287]

Yeah, they can kiss our azzes

[@malikawilson7071]

@Holly James here’s the thing. She’s 70. She has a OLD SCHOOL MAMMIE mentality. She’s the WRONG person to even talk with. She also was the breadwinner in her marriage so she doesn’t know what it’s like to be provided for. So she needs to sit this out.

[@clarencedolan699]

@@malikawilson7071How about women stop asking women what men want…..

[@malikawilson7071]

@Clarence Dolan That doesn’t have anything to do with the actual topic, but not a bad idea either.

[@greatgownsbeautifulgowns]

What is hilarious to me is how Eboni is wrong for not wanting to date a bus driver--*YET* Iyanla *LITERALLY SAID* that she would date a bus driver but she would have a prenup in place and her own stash of money... Doesn't that mean that she's just as protective of her assets and thinking proactively about her future just like Eboni? 🥴

[@sweetpeaj1952]

That doesn't even work because heaven forbid Eboni gets sick and can't work, the bus driver's salary can't maintain her lifestyle.

[@greatgownsbeautifulgowns]

​@@sweetpeaj1952 Exactly! The only way he would be maintaining her lifestyle is with HER money.

[@sweetpeaj1952]

​@@greatgownsbeautifulgowns 😂 right

[@SanctifiedLady]

She’s just crazy, trying to pull a seemly hopeless community together. They can say what they want….I’m not average never been average and if he can’t allow me to live in peace in my femininity then whomever will be miserable because he will be working around the clock to provide. My prenup will say what I earn is mine if I earn anything and what he earns is mine too! I will most like out live him so he need to provide in his very average at best death…we have each other ladies we will not die alone. They will no man will stay around a wipe another black man’s butt.

[@nicole.s2652]

It’s funny she said a prenup but u want to set other women up to fail

[@queenm8790]

If a lawyer was with a bus driver I would think she was really desperate

[@malikawilson7071]

Me too

[@sweetpeaj1952]

Same. And the man she's dating would think so too.

[@malikawilson7071]

@sweet pea J Exactly

[@beemocha]

Exactly! You right 😂😂😂😂

[@niax782]

She’d have to be *VERY* desperate 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@levelup5100]

I honestly think Eboni was the PERFECT woman to say what she said because had an unambiguous BW said that; she would’ve been drug for filth with all kinds of comments degrading her looks. She’s a preference in the black community and you can’t get mad when your preference has preferences and doesn’t prefer you 😂

[@beemocha]

i agree

[@sweetpeaj1952]

Well the only thing they are dragging her for is her age. That says a lot.

[@munaali840]

@@mochamommyATX none for her looks

[@anime-nn9kl]

@@babyyloverk2565 yep. She’s not ugly, fat or broke. She has no kids, she’s educated … she checks all the boxes so the only Thing they can do is call her old.

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

That's what this controversy is really all about. It's not about Eboni being elitist. Black men prefer women who look a certain way, and average earning black men don't like knowing that wealthy women who look that way don't prefer them.

[@BlkMedusa]

If that bus driver won the lottery today he would not be dating the same women he was dating yesterday. Case closed.

[@niax782]

Good point ‼️

[@TomikaKelly]

And that's the part nobody wants to talk about.

[@Alyssaj1236]

Exactly!!!!

[@prettybrwneyez7757]

He’ll be screaming from the rooftop, “Imma finally get my passport and go to the Philippines and find me a submissive wife. Imma save myself!” 🤣 No one wants to have that convo tho.

[@roshellegouldbourne787]

Thank you.

[@MsBrooklyn11232]

Hey Chrissie! I find it really interesting that everyone keeps telling BW to lower their standards, but nobody ever tells BM to elevate and better themselves. This is one crazy world that we are living in!

[@sweetpeaj1952]

That part.

[@malikawilson7071]

Because BM are the only race of men who are CODDLED! No accountability and no responsibility

[@islandgirl8067]

🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯

[@niax782]

TBH, I think most BM can’t elevate 🤷🏽‍♀️ they’re not exactly intellectuals.

[@garnetbabe2.0godschild40]

​@@niax782😂😂😂😂 That's true

[@rainbowbrite9780]

Isn’t Iyanla from the generation of women that say’ “ a piece of man is better than no man?” These women are to blame why our generation coddle these men with no expectations for them to elevate.

[@latilove4809]

Who even came up with that saying to begin with! Ridiculous 🫣

[@prayerpower1585]

Not only that, Iyanla recently said that she believes women (meaning black women) should be ok with sharing men (meaning black men) because there are not enough to go around. She has no standards for men in general and her main focus when it comes to relationships seems to be sexuality. I think she should not be called Iyanla anymore. We should call her Rhonda Harris (no disrespect meant to other Rhondas out there.)

[@GeeBee212]

I wish that young women would stop pinning that saying on older women. I know many younger women who not just say that, but they live it. It is more of a socieconomic phenoma. Educated Black women don't buy into that. Especially if you came from a home where certain behavior was modeled for you. My parents and grandparents are all college educated professionals. My grandmother's generation was not legally able to get a credit card, buy a car or obtain a mortgage without man's signature so marriage was a financial and social necessity. Even then her family would not have allowed her to marry "any piece of man."

[@Jahlelal]

​@BrooklynBorn 83 There's some truth to that. But you're generation of black women are still the most misogynoiristic generation that coddle your sons which while demonizing your daughters leading to the black community being ain't shit. Also y'all are the worst generation of black women, you spoil worthless black men and antagonizing innocent black women women who don't want gutter men like yall do/did.

[@mzyorkie]

@@latilove4809 Betty Wright said that in her "No Pain, NO Gain" Song that "having a piece of a man is better than having no man at all"....as much as I love her songs she was the Epitome of a PICK-MESHA

[@candycrusher2024]

Blue collar man does not mean that hes a good man. I dont like the assumption that a blue collar man is automatically a good man.

[@prettybrwneyez7757]

Excellent point!!! Some are entitled pricks

[@tiffanyyisrael7989]

Why can't the bus driver find a female bus driver to date? 🤔

[@princessigbo2631]

Like other races of WOMEN, BM don’t and won’t date down (role reversal). Only BW date down.

[@kittensmitten3287]

Facts 😂 get yo azz on who wants to date a bus driver and beat it

[@SanctifiedLady]

She wants a HVM! 😂 HVM wants a women to work but never make more then them. HVM don’t want her working the bus route either that’s a masculine job. Bottom line it’s a up hill struggle not to have BM approaching as HVM but driving small dollar cars in the parking lot. It’s an up hill struggle when BM are approaching BW just lying to impress for sex and over sexualizing BW. I’m staying on the receiving money and gifts end but they will never have enough or do enough to have my body.

[@dianasohn2515]

She don’t have to deal with him either. Wmn should date up

[@rabbiyah5]

Exactly

[@mojojojo8213]

What is hilarious is she never specifically said bm, this is a hit dog hollering.

[@malikawilson7071]

‼️‼️

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

She never said specifically black me in her because she's an attractive black woman they expect her to date only black men. That's my DJ envy points out the fact that she had a white ex fiance.

[@pricillamiza8378]

BM they like to be the centre of attention 😂😂😂😂 and I couldn't believe my eyes that huge number of men who were instantly clapping back were actually BM. for me it tells a lot about BM . Personally speaking this was so ridiculous. this men they acted out as if this matter was entirely about them . Let me ask : don't we have white , Indian , Chinese men who are bus drivers? Like BM are petty on a whole different level 😅.

[@ryanyoung9202]

THIS HAS BEEN SO CONTROVERSIAL because the MEN feel like they CAN’T meet the STANDARD and the MAMMY (MOTHERS) feel BLAMED for their SON’S not being able to meet the STANDARD

[@garnetbabe2.0godschild40]

​@@passionatedahliathese males will never step up each other. Smh.

[@malikawilson7071]

@Persephone's Kisses 💋💋 it’s crazy I’m seeing women OPTING out of dating because of this and I see why and don’t blame them!

[@garnetbabe2.0godschild40]

@@malikawilson7071 girl I'm one of them 🙋🏾‍♀️

[@malikawilson7071]

@Persephone's Kisses 💋💋 if I’m not blessed with what I prayed for then I will be TOO. Single, 32 and childless and with the way it’s going girl that might be the better choice!!!!!

[@CallHerTJ]

Exactly! These women are looking out for their sons because they want them to have access to high quality, high earning black women.

[@Aries16603]

How are the group of men with the lowest marriage rate complaining about the type of men other women want? The nerve, the audacity and the entitlement from these dusties. Y’all don’t even marry the preferences that you glorify so much.

[@sweetpeaj1952]

Right. Look at Big Sean. I think he did some romantic gesture for Jenae Aiko yesterday, but no ring? Please..

[@malikawilson7071]

@sweet pea J it just goes to show they treat their PREFERENCES the same. Khloe Kardashian, Danileigh, Emily B Erica Mena, Cyn Santana all single mothers and BABY MAMAS.

[@Aries16603]

@@malikawilson7071Kylie Jenner and Iggy Azelea.

[@malikawilson7071]

@Vonnie Dutch And the list goes ON

[@Aries16603]

@@malikawilson7071and all of the biracial women who trap the basketball players. They had no intentions of wifing them up anyway. Let’s also include Drake in it since he wants to be a black dusty so badly.

[@CallHerTJ]

BW have ALWAYS dated mediocre income men & that’s part of the reason we’re headed to a collective ZERO net worth. For a community that weaponizes marriage, we sure do CONVENIENTLY forget that marriage is the foundation for generational wealth & generational wealth isn’t built on a mediocre income.

[@sweetpeaj1952]

💯

[@ryanyoung9202]

And all of what you said is why there is no generational success in the black community - THE “BAG” is VITAL

[@francisikwueme1688]

Booya

[@CallHerTJ]

@@ryanyoung9202 exactly. These men loovveee to idealize what dating was like “ back in the day” but fail to mention that in those days, men HAD to have enough money to support themselves, their wives & their kids. Men also had to have a home to move their wife into & money saved to support their family should they pass. BM hate feminism, but feminism & women’s independence is the ONLY reason why these n*ggas can dip a toe in the dating pool.

[@DeLaTr0ll]

I don’t think it’s mediocre income, it’s mentality and our cultural norms. No amount of money can change our mentality without work on our thoughts and behaviors.

[@catharsismemory]

How can she tell black women having high standards are the problem when the same community blames black women for not having high standards?

[@happynurse1062]

No matter the issue at hand when the men refuse to step up to manhood, they will blame everything on the women who are more likely to accept responsibility.

[@bubullibooooo9928]

This comment needs to be pinned!!❤❤

[@PrincessYonna1]

“Bw should choose better and stop dating pookie” “Bw have such high standards! Give pookie a chance!” The thing is majority of bm are pookies and they know this already 😂.

[@TVwriter23]

@@PrincessYonna1 Because when they do this and it happens they have an oh shit moment

[@parishers6351]

She’s a hypocrite that’s all. Been with a fork tongue 😂

[@Wall0fCatz]

It’s so weird how a lot of men think they deserve young, fit, pretty women and be average all around themselves😂😂😂😂 no sir stay in your lane of averageness!

[@donnapug]

Don’t you mean stay in your bus lane? 🤣 🚎

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

Apparently it's okay to tell black women that average looks won't get them an exceptionally wealthy man. But it's elitist to tell black men that an average job won't get them an exceptionally beautiful woman.

[@vashtikelly6837]

@@donnapug LOLOLOL

[@vashtikelly6837]

AGREE WOMEN NEED TO START TO SHOW MEN "THEMSELVES"!!!!....

[@Kiara-yi9un]

@@janedo-re-mi2738 📌 found the comment to pin 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@mia.la.americana]

Iyanla doesn’t give soft, feminine, submissive, fit, or friendly….. like at all. I’m surprised she of all people would call women masculine 🤔

[@charmaineespeut4627]

Its projection.

[@876me7]

Exactly. She’s incredibly masculine! She even has a smokers laugh, which sounds disgusting.

[@Marley4everable]

Bingo!🎯

[@50sizfabulous75]

😂😂😂 I’m sorry that needed to be said She’s Masculine from her voice to looks and mannerisms

[@Las645]

She seems fit, she’s not overweight

[@melissatwo9352]

I'm just going to say that from my observation, people think bw are not attractive enough, so don't qualify to have standards. Also some bw accept this notion, which is why they don't mind dating bums. Bums know this too which is why they don't do better. If Eboni was 20 saying this, they would still say she cannot get high value men to want her. And it comes back to her being a bw. Jeanine Mai and many others get to rest in their femininity after an age where they say women hit the wall. Please.

[@malikawilson7071]

@Melissa two that’s why BW need to stop listening to men who aren’t in HER tax bracket lol and keep her standards! She can find a man with integrity and on her career level. They believe BW doesn’t deserve both

[@melissatwo9352]

​@@malikawilson7071 right.

[@levelup5100]

Jeanie Mai is the PERFECT equivalence!

[@perdybirdie]

Yup. Kevin samuels even had a video praising Jeannie Mai I'm sure if he was alive he would be chewing g ebony up though. Embarrassing and pathetic

[@sweetnurnot10]

This!!!

[@CapricornQueen7425]

The men who can't meet the standard need to just leave women alone. Beat it!

[@malikawilson7071]

@Joey Muluba Best comment from a man in this thread

[@new_to_planet4424]

Exactly dead weight needs to fall the f back!!

[@Ashley.Melissa]

@Joey Muluba a man who gets it 🥲

[@restisresistance]

🤣🤣🤣

[@damianbarnes2717]

As a black man to me this was a stupid question to begin with. Because men are level set. We know what type of women we qualify for. As a man you accept what you can get .An you get what you can afford.A bus driver would not even approach her knowing she’s a lawyer. Because he knows he doesn’t qualify for this type of woman.

[@niax782]

Agreed.

[@prettybrwneyez7757]

Please tell your brethren this. They’re the ones who aren’t getting it. Thanks, Mgmt.

[@malikawilson7071]

@DAMIAN BARNES Somebody with some sense 😂‼️

[@vashtikelly6837]

PREACH DAMN IT PREACH!!!!!!!

[@pricillamiza8378]

Exactly 💯😂😂

[@whyme7862]

All this blue collar money yet the community is poor.🤔

[@melissatwo9352]

Exactly. Don't they see they need to level up.

[@mekichey129]

Oooh Chile

[@sunfire5790]

Yup 🥱

[@ReeRee_Donita]

Yes- short-sightedness is another disease these people suffer from

[@Neila942]

They need to stop giving money to Pastor Whoever and invest it instead.

[@heyyourebeautiful3867]

Ladies stack your money, (real estate, stocks, franchises, tax liens, buying a business, etc) anything so you can do to separate yourself from these failed group of men.

[@prettybrwneyez7757]

Chrissie should pin this comment.

[@vashtikelly6837]

AGREE AND I GOT MINES......

[@largerthanlife8974]

I’m investing in my real estate right now, I’m currently starting my portfolio loan of real estate. I have a goal to buy a business or state a commercial business by the age of 35 years old. 🎉🎉🎉

[@Mothermochi]

Iyana was just projecting her no standards on Eboni. It is personal for Iyanla. About a decade ago she did a reunion with Oprah and her failed marriage was a topic of discussion as she believed something she said on Oprah’s show was the “nail in the coffin” for her marriage. The discussions provided two interesting discoveries in the context of his current controversy: 1. She acknowledged that her husband had no career or job. She acknowledges this dynamic caused him insecurities that ultimately made him leave her. Making a point that money doesn’t mean anything, she blurted out “ my man ain’t got no money” with him sitting in Oprah’s audience balled up. Oprah reminds her that her relationship is health BECAUSE her partner has a career he is proud of and encourages her 2. Iyanla agrees that that insecurity was inside of her partner- not hers but blames herself for having said the truth. Oprah video: starts at about 4mins in kzbin.info/www/bejne/rnKxlmOhaJuFbJI It’s my view that Iyanla is extremely trauma bonded to abusive and parasitic relationships. She took Eboni’s response personally because Eboni CAN do better and she simply doesn’t know how. She blames herself and all black women for not humbling themselves, as to not disrupt the fragile ego of their partner. If you don’t, you had it coming. That weird live stream she did was also revealing. She talks about a $80 Christmas tree she wanted so much she asked the shop owner to hold for her husband to purchase for her. He went out of his way to not only not buy her a tree, but not buy a tree at all - he celebrated kwanza. That sounds emotionally abusive to me. She took the blame for that as if she had not humbled herself enough. When a white women calls echoing the sentiments of other callers telling a anecdote about playing small in a similar relationship, Iyana says something telling to me. “I didn’t know how to do that”. As if playing small would’ve avoided her the consequences of being left. This woman should not be giving anyone any relationship advice and is in desperate need of a therapist. Her anecdotes just informed people how to be victims of domestic violence. I am a survivor, it’s all over her argument. I feel sorry for her. Please don’t listen to a damn word she is saying, it’s not coming from a healthy place.

[@prayerpower1585]

Interestingly, she did say that people should not look to her for relationship advice (although she was joking when she said it). In a recent interview she emphasized that she is still figuring things out. She seems mean spirited to me.

[@Mothermochi]

@@prayerpower1585 something is definitely off. I just know, this whole thing seemed disingenuous and dishonest knowing the background she has. She had no business asking people questions like that and putting people on the spot to make a nonsensical point. Imagine if Eboni’s answer was “ I don’t want to end up like you.” Serious gaslighting from here, it’s all projecting. 🙄

[@cedrimar]

I've been waiting for someone to dig up that story. Well done. Iyanla has not healed from her own, decades long dusty encounter. But giving others advice....😂

[@mekichey129]

When the 1st WW called and straight up asked why are BW shamed for having a standard and berated by the whole black community. Iyanla was shocked and acted like she never said BW.

[@mekichey129]

@@prayerpower1585 If BW level up there will be less cannon fodder for her to dissect in her show she is vying for.

[@queenm8790]

This is very unrealistic a lawyer and bus driver are not even on the same circle how would they even meet

[@sherelljasper8837]

That was my question

[@kittensmitten3287]

Cynthia asked the same question

[@garnetbabe2.0godschild40]

That's a good question 🤔

[@stemnist1302]

Girl you be surprised 😮 that’s a whole Tyler perry movie.

[@tashibalampkin8555]

When her car broke down so she got to take the bus. 🤣

[@RampagingChipmunk]

I sincerely hope that the only women taking Iyanla seriously are the ones in her own age group who already believed in the same things. I do have faith that more of the younger women will disregard her.

[@seagreen2034]

Unfortunately there are women in their 30s & 40s agreeing with Iyanla’s bs.🤦🏾‍♀️

[@DarlingEbony]

Younger women were giving her the business on her KZbin page. I was so proud of them.

[@malikawilson7071]

@Seagreen20 im 32 and knew she was spewing NONSENSE!

[@GeeBee212]

Many women in her age group do not agree with her. They're just not on social media in the numbers that the younger demographic are.

[@perdybirdie]

I'm 28 and iyanla is an old pickme. We see where that led her in life and I want NO parts.

[@MyRedmamba]

Lets be honest. If Eboni was a regular receptionists working at an office she still would probably NOT date a bus driver. Why? Because she is pretty and elite men would still try to date her. Actually now that I think more on it, she would probably be even more determined to marry up because if she didn't have her own bag.

[@niax782]

YEP! IMO, all this backlash is because Eboni is attractive.

[@alee111]

Yep! A preference that doesn't prefer them! And she didn't even say bm

[@etherealdreams7546]

@@niax782 I don’t think it’s only because of her being attractive because bm react the same way when any black woman says she wants men on her financial level despite what that woman looks like but I definitely think her being attractive and considered a preference is one of the reasons they’re mad with Eboni.

[@AmaraReyal]

All the bus drivers quitting their jobs 😂

[@garnetbabe2.0godschild40]

Exactly in Miami Dade we need bus drivers!

[@niax782]

LOL … they’re catching heat 😂😂😂

[@GeeBee212]

No they're not! In NYC they make 150K, top tier medical/dental/optical, defined benefit pensions, many have dgerees or at least some college. They have flexible work hours giving them time to start their own businesses. They belong to one of the most influential unions in the country. A physician might be a high income earner and well educated but have a low net worth due to having 500K in student loans and a high debt to income ratio. When considering the financial side, look at net worth instead of profession. Millionaires like our 45th President are also broke! I've come across many of them in my profession. Don't lower your standards but look in non traditional spaces and at non tradition faces.

[@876me7]

@@GeeBee212they are not making $150k. Stop lying. They make more than most other city bus drivers, but they’re not making $150k. I get on the bus everyday and if these men were making that much, they wouldn’t be so bitter, angry and unprofessional. I’m sick of ppl lying about bus drivers making six figures. Maybe a small few of them maybe making that after 20 yrs on the job and a shit ton of overtime. Police officers and mta train conductors aren’t even making $150k but you expect ppl to believe bus drivers who only have to have a high school diploma or GED is getting paid that much. Stop the cap lol 🙄

[@GoddessBlueYozakura7]

@@GeeBee212 Lmao. I'm in CA and the average bus driver makes 38-54k.

[@kristiemao4275]

I still think Iyanla asked that question to deliberately set up Eboni. I've read Iyanla's books and valued her as a life coach. I didn't know who Eboni was until recently. I stand with Eboni. I have lost so much respect for Iyanla. She would never ask a woman of another race and in Eboni's class whether she would date a bus driver. BW are the only ones who are expected to accept anything or anyone. I am so angry at Iyanla.

[@pricillamiza8378]

You're right the way that question came out😂😂😂. I'm sure s fk that it was deliberate and the way she replied back to Ebony . you can see right through her LS eyes she prepared herself so very well for that response . Miss inyanla is messy sfk period 😢.

[@angneatb6036]

I agree. She knew Eboni would say something considered adverse to BM.

[@Igboman87]

How do you know Iyanla wouldn't ask a woman of a different race the same question?

[@new_to_planet4424]

@@Igboman87 Because we have brains and sense that’s how! Pull up ONE video on the internet of another race of professional woman being asked that?! I’ll wait….

[@kristiemao4275]

@Igboman87 because she would be laughed off the air and have no career left because other communities expect more for their woman. I doubt Iyanla would pose that question to Kim Kardashian who is currently looking for someone. She wouldn't ask that question despite Kim starring in a sex tape or stealing from Brandi's mom. And we all know why.

[@largerthanlife8974]

I was 23 years old and I’ll never forget how a 40 years old Jamaican man from New York told me he wanted a relationship with me. In the vetting process I asked him about his career, this negro had the nerve to tell me that he worked at a warehouse, did lawn service and also did Uber eats. When I asked him why not start his own business? He got so upset and offended. He told me he made enough. 😂 I was shocked by his response, he clearly didn’t make enough if he had 3 jobs and still lived in an apartment. I broke that off easily. Blocked instantly.

[@Lioness_Es]

Ewww, he was probably ran through and was looking for a young lady to ruin her life as well. Glad you had the foresight to say no and block his creepy, disgusting *ss!

[@MsLissy98]

You must remember, KS said it himself- when he was addressing the men, he didn’t have the viewers because men don’t like to hear about themselves. When he turned his ire to women, he blew up.

[@callalilly4743]

The overeaction is a scare tactic to keep black women stuck.

[@malikawilson7071]

@Calla Lilly it’s fear mongering and it’s pathetic

[@vashtikelly6837]

AGREE.........

[@coloursof-autumn8650]

@@malikawilson7071 exactly. But some young black girls may read those comments from dusties and start to believe they aren’t worth anything. That really depresses me.

[@josephschmizzo1595]

Stuck where?

[@DoesItReallyMatter25]

“Ride or die” ain’t nothing but codependency & mental/emotional/spiritual brokenness.

[@vashtikelly6837]

AGREE.......

[@gonegirl9114]

My ex is a 43 year old homeless Uber driver. He comes back into my life after not haven’t slept with him in 14 years immediately talking about when are you going to let me love on you again. I cussed him out and told him about his self. He goes on to say women are too independent. Feminism destroyed black relationships yada yada. He’s literally a bum who doesn’t even know how to relate to a women in a non sexual way. Instead of him fixing himself and getting his life together its black womens fault some how.

[@Undrconst]

My ex did the same thing. He is a 38yr old janitor living in his mama’s basement and had some nerve to try and throw that same rhetoric. These men who follow these podcasters and KZbinrs are unhinged.

[@donnapug]

It’s a typical reaction from a dusty

[@prettybrwneyez7757]

@@donnapug Yes! Dusty logic

[@etherealdreams7546]

Lol y’all shouldn’t stay in contact with these dusty exes, u should completely remove them from your life and don’t communicate with them at all at any time.

[@etherealdreams7546]

@gonegirl9114 u should’ve told him what really destroyed black relationships is misogynoir and that men are too dependent and entitled they want to be taken care of and expect to have easy free access to women’s bodies even though they’re broke & homeless.

[@ryanyoung9202]

IYANLA’s SON has been to jail and 2 of her GRANDSONS have been to jail (SHE STATED ON A BEHIND THE SCENES ON HER FIX MY LIFE SHOW)

[@levelup5100]

Yet she’s who we’re listening to “fix our lives”? Fix it Jesus

[@malikawilson7071]

@level up 😂😂😂

[@876me7]

She raised dusties and has the nerve to lecture ppl. Foh

[@callalilly4743]

This is who she wants us to lower our standards for.

[@harrytimmy5070]

She needs some dumb black women for her sunzzz

[@tresarichardson7062]

IF BW ARE THE LEAST DESIRED, WHY DOES ANYONE CARE ABOUT WHO WE DATE PERIODT?!! LEAVE US ALONE AND LET US LIVE/BE HAPPY!!!🔥💃🏾👑

[@porchaflakes121]

This!! I swear it seems like BW leave Rent-free in A LOT of ppl's mind smh

[@zsazsasays1573]

Exactly, I thought they were passport bros like that dusty that went abroad and had to beg people to cash app him so he can come home on spirit airlines 😂😂😂

[@tresarichardson7062]

@@zsazsasays1573 😆😆😆

[@josephschmizzo1595]

The problem is this: This is bad advice for young BW who havent done the proper character work to handle being w a high value/high performance man. What ACTUALLY happens is that they get into these relationships w these “ballers” and they have no wifely skills so theres a cultural tug of war that ends w the BW just calling the guy manipulative and evil because she isnt willing to change… If it worked, BW would be getting married, they aren’t. The problem is the culture and the behavior…running to a man w more $ is never the solution…EVER.

[@deborahfrederick916]

@@josephschmizzo1595 The problem is Black men telling Black women what is wrong with us. JUST GO AWAY!

[@manij1913]

I can’t stand people dehumanizing and villainizing men with money or making it seem like you can’t have a decent man that makes decent money . Broke men can be toxic too, they cheat too, they can be abusive too like you don’t have to choose between being treated well AND financial stability. The gag is Iyanla and other know she has decent standards but the question is who she’s gone get her standards from bc the world would have a hissy fit if she were to date out her race again and actually marry

[@plwhite40]

Absolutely. Very abusive.

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

Right, and that's Eboni made that point The Breakfast Club. Every average earning man isn't a saint and every financially successful man isn't a toxic. Women don't have to choose between a wealthy man and a nice man. You can have both.

[@essiethebestie1]

Exactly. I'm tired of people gaslighting BW, by trying to make it seem like broke or average men are God fearing, great men who will treat you like a queen. And well off men are monsters. TRUTH is. Broke men and men who make less than their women are MUCH MORE likely to be monsters💯 Abusive, cheating, narcissistic, toxic men. It's a dumbass ploy that BW need to stop falling for.

[@saehisaya]

It’s hilarious. The boys and men in my family and around me are quite laid back, intelligent, and pleasant people to be around and they are generous with their money. All of this “high value” stereotype is based on new money fools, not those with old money or those who were taught how to value money and other people.

[@etherealdreams7546]

Yep and the truth is most broke bm men are abusive and toxic most bw are in relationships and have been in relationships with many emotionally, verbally, and physically abusive men who didn’t respect or value them, cheated on them, didn’t marry them, made them baby mommas, gave them stds, etc. but yet they will quickly let bm brain wash them into saying how abusive rich men are and how nice & sweet poor men are. Many bm are very mean and angry when they’re poor. And when they make less than their girlfriends or are all together unemployed they feel emasculated and they take it out on their girlfriends. They still want submission and respect and to feel like they’re traditional men in the relationship even though they’re making less or altogether being taken care of by their women and it makes them angry when they don’t get that from their women who’re taking care of or making more than them.

[@thegigidiaries]

Yes to the fear mongering. I will be 30 this year and recently moved to a new city. I have to turn guys down who are 19 - 23 because they think I’m their age. Everything you said is a FACT. No kids , good health , & personal development keep you YOUNG

[@Las645]

My sister still looks 20 and she has a kid. So what does “no kids” have to do with it? Just take care of yourself it’s that simple

[@vashtikelly6837]

@@Las645 AGREE........

[@simplysuzan21]

​@@Las645 your sister does not represent the collective of single struggling mothers who tend to age faster as a result of stress which I'm pretty sure is what she's referring to.

[@blackwidowrowe6271]

That’s true. The same thing is happening to me I’m about to be 30. Also before people get offended,women AGE faster than men,ESPECIALLY when kids and marriage added into the picture. We see that in the black community all the time. Get real. Most women with children’s bodies change VERY drastically and not every woman can afford surgery and etc to get their body back to its original state.

[@niax782]

Chrissie, thanks for covering the fake outrage. Also, there was so much coded language in what Iyanla was saying. Iyanla is the one that shaded BM by using the bus driver example. Why didn’t Iyanla ask Eboni if she’d date an account or a real estate agent? Truth be told, some BM might have caught the shade from Iyanla, but they don’t care what Iyanla (a women they don’t find secksually attractive) thinks. They care about what Eboni (a woman they DO find seckually attractive) thinks.

[@kaylad1669]

This is exactly what I said… Iyanla is the one who even brought bus drivers into the discussion in the first place. She’s the one who was looking down on them, not Eboni.

[@levelup5100]

@@kaylad1669 BINGO 🎊

[@SanctifiedLady]

An above average women and below average man? They would have NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT AND NOTHING IN COMMON…he will be bringing trash home and she will be wearing a mask 😷

[@pricillamiza8378]

She was shady sfk and afterwards she down played it as if she was miss innocent 😂😂😂😂 that woman is messy 😅

[@pricillamiza8378]

& What was the point of inyanla to say " she would date a bus driver if that bus driver was a man of integrity and he loved to drive a buses 😂😂😂😂 is so ironic that BM they couldn't read between the lines and chose to jump of on Ebony .these men are one sided ...

[@queenm8790]

This is why they hate Steve Harvey because he hold them accountable

[@queenbee3561]

Yeah, pretty much! LoL!

[@GeeBee212]

Holding them accountable but Steve Harvey and his friends don't want wives like Eboni. Even high income earners are intimidated. They'd see Eboni as being in competition with them,

[@nikkiq5124]

@@GeeBee212 not true. His daughter for example is well accomplished and is dating men in a similar circle just fine.

[@Undrconst]

@@GeeBee212 and they see Majorie as a gold digger. In short these bm who are chronically online do not know what they want.

[@apricityventura2002]

@@passionatedahlialmaoo exactly like what are these men talking about😂😂

[@TessieDobey]

I asked my white female co-workers and they replied with "ok, why is this a big deal?"

[@truetwinflameandspirituala8211]

The Eboni and Iyanla incident is a PERFECT example of why age is nothing but a number.🙄🙄🤦🏾‍♀️ Look at the RESULTS and put yourself around people who are SUCCESSFULLY living the life that you want. Iyanla said herself that she is "old school". A lot of people who are old/elderly, think they know everything and become judgmental bc they have lived for 70+ years. But, who's to say they have been making the RIGHT decisions more times than not in those 70 years? Based on Iyanla Vanzant's marriage history, she does not know anything about who Eboni or anyone else should marry. She can date all the bus drivers that she wants but even she said she isn't getting married again. And if she were to get married, he's signing a prenup and she'll keep a separate account on the side.😳 No one talked about that. Why would she say that? Does she fear she'll be the next Mary J. Blige, Halle Berry, Wendy Williams (he cheated on her, married and had a baby with the side piece😳😤🤦🏾‍♀️) and so many other women paying their exes alimony?? But, clown 🤡 Iyanla sits up on her BIG platform and irresponsibly tells Eboni to marry a man who is in a significantly lower tax bracket. VERY irresponsible, especially when Eboni told her what she is looking for. A Protector and A Provider. Iyanla has shown me, a 40 yo BW who's currently engaged and was married over a decade ago, that Iyanla is more concerned about getting the bag than genuinely helping Black Women who are looking for their Preferences. Iyanla is trash 🗑. I never liked her before. Something about her never sat right with me and after this fiasco and watching the Black Community (and I call it that loosely) bully Eboni has just confirmed and validated what I already knew and believe. I would highly suggest learning from people who are actually living the life you want. Iyanla needs to be CANCELLED. She is dangerous at this point. Black Women who have worked hard to get into middle/upper middle class/upper class despite being Black and being a Woman, aren't looking for a project in our partners and we aren't raising anyone else's grown sons. Kevin Samuels had a laundry list of degrading advice that he gave Black Women and everyone ran around and sang his praises. Black males been sitting online for at least 2 decades, telling the World what they want and don't want. And that they are entitled to their "preferences". But, a Black Woman says she won't date a bus driver unless he owns the bus company and the Black Community is outraged??? Shows me that Black Women need to KEEP OUR OPTIONS OPEN. Show Black American males that they aren't our only choice. There's POWER in Walking Away. ONLY Date/Marry men who make what you make or more. 💰 NEVER compromise on your Preferences or do things you're uncomfortable with, no matter how much the BC tries to bully you.💅🏿 And it is OK to be Single until God sends you the One.😌❤️ And I'd like to see more podcasts and channels teaching Black American men how to be husbands. Stop talking to and at Black Women about what we need to do and change. We aren't the problem. And I suggest people stop taking advice from people who failed at marriage or have never been married. It's like the blind leading the blind and makes no sense. Then, you're wondering why you're dating/marrying badly. A lot of answers to your problems are common sense and you ignore your Inner Voice bc you've been brainwashed by the Black community to do so.

[@vashtikelly6837]

AGREE.......

[@pricillamiza8378]

😂😂😂

[@_gonna_renew_my_sinew]

Greatttt comment !! Reflection of all my sentiments !! Awesome.

[@callmecanolli322]

Sis! Thank you for telling the whole truth. Iyanla has always been a pick me. She seems so desperate and she shouldn’t be giving any advice to black women when it comes to dating.

[@drkninja555]

I don’t even consider a bus driver average. That’s really below average. But the bar is set low for black men so this is what they consider average. I’m a average woman (a nurse). I don’t consider a bus driver average and I wouldn’t consider dating one.

[@ccb6013]

I swear the "black community" is so tiring at this point😒 The same ones who demand BW maintain low standards are the same ones who jump to tell BW "you should have chose better" when the relationships fall apart. _This_ is why level-headed BW are pulling away and are picking from better/different dating pools. BM should be embarrassed by now.

[@alee111]

You have to have sense to be embarrassed. But I believe it is coming. As more bw divest to different paths (singlehood, lesbianism, nonbm, etc) and nonbm start speaking out more vocally on the topic, the shame will come. In the meantime bw, can't be bothered to wait for this awakening that might* come.

[@ccb6013]

@Alee Yup, you also have to have some level of dignity to be embarrassed when you get called out for pathetic behavior. It's why BM are so arrogant, entitled, and over confident, they have been coddled from developing any level of shame.

[@etherealdreams7546]

@@alee111 the problem with them is that they don’t have sense or the humility to be embarrassed, they’re very arrogant and aren’t humble at all

[@pinklady2994]

Missed you Chrissie 💕💕💕 Cheers to a “ Hit the wall” summer! 🥂😅 Let’s have fun ladies 💃🏿 Standards and heels high always.

[@garnetbabe2.0godschild40]

41:00 I'm so sorry for the older generation BW for withstanding abuse. Yet it's not ok for them spread this toxic rhetoric to the younger generations because its blk women stuck with no progression. Also i believe Chrissie is right about older BW being jealous of young BW. They definitely don't understand why modern/younger BW dont want to tolerate disrespect anymore! I've grown up in multiple family homes where i see the BW slaving away & the men dont make it easier. They either don't contribute or are stingy with money like my dad.

[@sunfire5790]

I wish I could like this comment million times🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯

[@tiredoftheworld4834]

@Cal Watch your comment overlooks the problem. My dad is stingy as well… and it affects his marriage. My mother feels like she’s the only parent in the relationship and she’s the breadwinner… the only reason why we aren’t homeless…

[@vashtikelly6837]

DAMN RIGHT BABYGIRLLL

[@deborahfrederick916]

As a 67 year old Black woman who supports Chrissie, I disagree with your statement about older women.

[@evamathebula4448]

@@deborahfrederick916 an exception doesn't erase the collective issue mam

[@Nicole-em9yo]

It should be a given that a woman like Eboni who is way above average will not deal with a regular guy. It’s really a testament to how delusional black men are that they think a regular man should have access to her

[@porchaflakes121]

I think the issue is that they Know they don't have a chance in Hell, but they just don't want her to Say it out loud😆

[@islandgirl8067]

Welcome back Chrissie, I'm catching the replay. ❤ Iyanla comes from that older generation of BW who guilt and shame younger BW into lowering their standards, instead of telling BM to do better. Eboni didn't specify BM, but they and the pickmes got offended because most BM don't measure up. They're all mad because How dare BW have standards and expectations.

[@perdybirdie]

Yup. We need to stop coddling BM once and for all. They need to stand up and be men. Especially since they've been berating us to be more feminine lately. That comes at a cost

[@pricillamiza8378]

I also missed her like this KZbin streets were so lonely n dark without her 😢😢😢

[@SharayaMW]

Not only that, Chrissie. They're talking and arguing back and forth with women who have experience having loved, dated, and married men like that trying to make it seem like every blue-collar man is exceptional and hard-working; guaranteed to give a woman everything she wants and needs. I'm like y'all really need to chill with that, because not every low earning or middle class man is humble or even necessarily hard-working. He could have taken a decent job at some point and that's it for him. Love your perspective on this! 👩🏽‍🏫

[@laignermassey3631]

As a Mixed woman, I'm glad Black and mixed women are upping their standards and standing 10 toes down on them. The duties are TRIGGERED when LS, Mixed, ambiguous women don't prefer them. They love to say we're Black women then, knowing they don't prefer darkskin, unambiguous women. Being a preference in the BC isn't a prize or a badge of honor. It's not.

[@amaradominique]

Black men think a gold digger is a woman who want a McDonald’s happy meal.

[@jazzystar1086]

😂😂😂or women who get 100 dollars per month in child support

[@amaradominique]

@@jazzystar1086 yep. How ignant can u be.

[@charlotteziggy8353]

😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

[@s-for-4501]

As an old woman, Iyanla's age, I must say that this conversation was happening when we were young as well. Please note that many of us college educated and professional women had to make the choice to not date/marry down. The same issues existed then, men that were successful chose to date out of their race or the cute "secretaries". To you young women, being single has allowed me to live a wonderful and adventurous life which I continue to have at my age. I always made my career decisions based on what I wanted, my financial decisions were my own allowing me to live comfortably in retirement. There is no need to compromise.

[@MzBrOdUs18]

Exactly!! 💯💯 The audacity of Iyanla to say that modern women are men in skirts but then HAVE THE NERVE to shame Eboni for making the FEMININE decision by refusing to use her million dollar bag to take care of a man!!! Cuz that’s exactly what she’ll be doing with a bus driver. Make it make sense!! Though iyanla is usually wise and insightful, I now see her “ feminine energy” as performative when it comes to men. Normally when Iyanla speaks I’m intrigued but I’m sorry, this convo about men, Eboni made iyanla look like the typical basic dust bunny. She had no wise and insightful answers for Eboni and used shaming because she couldn’t add to Ebonis intellect in the topic of why providers are lacking in our community. I was applauding Eboni cause she publicly said what NOONE wants to say to black men.. meanwhile they for years been saying black women are the lowest of the low, average at best and undesirable 🤷🏾‍♀️ These men can ditch it but they cant take it. They would literally fall apart if black women stopped taking care of them and Validating them. Black women are black men’s life support and ONLY source of survival and emotional support. Their biggest fear is losing control of the black woman. They know they don’t do right by us and that’s why they need to use psychological abuse and manipulation. This is why though black women like Eboni represents the minority, black men work overtime to drag and shame ebony types to prevent us from influencing the masses. I’m glad she exposed the mentality of the black community ESP for those wanting to Get Out the dysfunction and toxic conditioning. Collectively, Black men are raised & influenced to be PIMPS and Black women are groomed and recruited to be money makers for black men. They could care less about you being feminine if it don’t come with a masculine bag for them to mooch off.

[@AP-yd1nt]

A bus driver "man of integrity", but no one considers women's "integrity" unless she's beautiful and a size 4 though right? 😂 no one tells accomplished MEN to settle

[@amaradominique]

They got mad at me at church because I told them not to tolerate the abuse.

[@ElaineLoyd]

Its funny that high value men cry out so loudly when momey is brought up.

[@plwhite40]

Listen

[@EchoJ]

This whole thing is just wild. No one said the bus driver has to die alone and a virgin🤣 Let the male bus driver date the lunchroom lady. Problem solved😏😌

[@kimcham9949]

👍🏾🤣🤣🤣

[@LetThereBeLight1111]

When you spoke about black women and the wall, I said yess Chrissie remind the people about how good we look when we take care of ourselves.. I’m here for all the shenanigans.

[@cautrey8925]

And whats hilarious is that Ebony never said black men. But you know hit dogs gone holler every time

[@bkstandard882]

I'm a black man and I don't see anything wrong with what this young lady said. Why the hell would an attorney want to be with a bus driver? Bus drivers earn less than 20 per hour in most areas.

[@jenbunny1984]

I totally agree! I’m over the BC they are so exhausting.

[@investirenafriquedepuisloccide]

They really are!

[@TomikaKelly]

🫤 I really wish Eboni would've responded to Iyanla's question with "this isn't about me personally, but about women in general. What's your answer to my question?"

[@mimi-rk2qu]

Mismatch - One Mowry twin marries WM on her level and still married. The other twin carries a BM full term and still has to discard him in the end. Moral of the story - accomplished BW stay in your lane and keep looking up!

[@Xara_K1]

I love how y'all use Tamera as if she wasn't straight up telling us her racist husband made her pay for the wedding, and she was the breadwinner for a while. This is not the flex y'all think it is. Both twins got the bottom of the barrel

[@mimi-rk2qu]

@@Xara_K1 …no comparison and if he’s such a racist, what does that make Tamera? 😂😂

[@Xara_K1]

@@mimi-rk2qu It's not a comparison to u coz u wanna elevate WM and ignore their negatives and thats entirely a u problem. And I said ge was the breadwinner for a while but Im 100% sure shes still the bw coz Adam has never had it like that. Hes too mediocre even as a WM. And it makes Tamera a woman who's married to a r@cist. Don't act like BW don't marry Proud Boys and members of the KKK.

[@coloursof-autumn8650]

@@Xara_K1 she married a racist powdered dusty? Say it ain’t so 😂😂

[@deborahfrederick916]

@@Xara_K1 The woman’s family traditionally pays for the wedding. I am not sure why that’s a problem.

[@rasta487]

Great point Chrissie. In that regard I hope Eboni becomes the female "Kevin Samuels". Her ongoing topic can be about average black men & the reason black women need to raise their standards.

[@alveniamcqueen5696]

This is by far the best read on the subject I have listened to. Another content creator that I truly like jumped on the "oh we need to coddle these poor average black men from women like Eboni" bandwagon and I found it very disappointing. Thank you for reminding the folks in the "back" that average, low earning, dusty, unemployed and out right disrespectful black men are nasty to average looking, overweight, darling skinned black women all yje time and are NEVER held accountable for it. If men are allowed to have preferences so can women...ALL women not just the "preferred" ones.

[@vashtikelly6837]

YOU FUCKING RIGHT!!!!

[@nowthatsacookie]

If dating a “ bus driver” does not work for her then it’s okay.

[@pink_magical_girl]

The "if he's good to his mama" thing has to go because I know men that are trifling af and their mom's are in on the mess

[@gigistoker9812]

Generations of BW have taken abuse and neglect from BM. Ladies now and coming, protect yourself. Do not accept this behavior. Don't do bad with nobody. Hold yourself above that mess men put out.

[@mekichey129]

Iyanla went live on stream Friday saying she is 1) Native American 2) Latina 3) African American.... She said she doesn't identify as black... So now she is naming herself a preference

[@malikawilson7071]

She’s pathetic

[@levelup5100]

Now what Latina/Native American is named Iylana? Sounds like she has identity issues

[@mekichey129]

@@levelup5100 At 69 she is entertaining Polygamy as well... She is having a late life crisis

[@yofinezzauntee]

A preference these Kangs still don't want, but she been pandering for close to a week so I'm sure Her Dusty bis driver will come qbd rescue her 🤭

[@patricerenee1717]

😂😆😂

[@DeLaTr0ll]

Look at Tia Mowry and how that ended. Like Chrissie said move in silence and like us bw always have done make the changes in our community.

[@tresboujay]

Thank you Chrissie for speaking on this. They love crying foul when the rabbit gets the gun.

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

That part, "Ain't no fun when the rabbit got the gun." It's okay for wealthy men to not want average looking women; but they take issue with wealthy, beautiful women not wanting average earning men.

[@50sizfabulous75]

Don’t listen to their BS about hitting the wall after 30 I’m 56 and still fine and them young ones still sweating me Black Women are F’ng Magic

[@jessicarabbit439]

This interview bought out all the mammies&dusties. They want black woman/girls to suffer so much. Yet have so much compassion/empathy for bb/bm who serial crimminals and violent towards other:ex- jordan neely nyc create by the busted community.

[@Daug555]

It’s the extreme lack of listening and comprehension skills these ninjas don’t have. Nowhere did she say BM. Nowhere did she insult or down average jobs. Eboni is sticking to her standards and not backing down on this and I hope BW never let up on maintaining their standards and boundaries.

[@coloursof-autumn8650]

“Lack of listening skills they don’t have” implies they DO have it.They DON’T. But we’re on the same page though!

[@aspiring...]

A woman iyanlas age should not be building anyone.

[@TomikaKelly]

If we haven't built by 70, then it's just not gonna get built.

[@alextroy9202]

People are shit! & the world wants us to remain humble and stay in our lane which I refuse. So disgusting

[@CandieP]

Every time I see a BM in the comments section talking about Eboni is 40 and single and will die alone with cats, I can’t help but chuckle 🤭 because I’m saying modern beautiful, successful women like Eboni would much rather die alone in peace rather than get Oops upside the head by a insecure bandit. Or worse, toe tagged by one of them who can’t handle his well accomplished wife’s success.

[@louisewilliams9417]

Chrissie you speak the truth, don't let anyone tell you your platform is toxic.

[@keyfield8967]

More like a bitter platform...

[@deborahfrederick916]

She has REPEATEDLY told people to leave her space if they don’t like the content. It’s free!

[@NKim-gj9vk]

If Iyanla had asked a man “Would you date a woman that weighs 225?” and he responded back “No, but I’d date a woman that weighs 180”… you’d see the video everywhere with men sharing it as “inspiration” for what women need to do to get a man. We have to be inspired by the harsh truth while they want to be coddled. So backwards

[@kimcham9949]

👍🏾🎯💯❤️

[@kia.203]

Oooo you are so right when you say they get mad when their preference doesn't want them. I recently saw a video where this latina woman was on a BM podcast, and she said that she doesn't date DSBM. The guy got mad, and told her he didn't like the fact she doesn't date DSBM, and threw water on her. Just disgusting!! So they really do be upset when the women they prefer, dont want them

[@laurenjackson2810]

Always spot on Chrissie 👏🏾 Your videos have literally saved my life, because I was headed down a horrible path of dating emotionally/physically abusive men, because of how our community has conditioned me to think of myself of deserving l. Now I’ve been in a healthy, loving, & spoiled relationship for the pat 5 years & I try to tell all of my friends & family about your videos so they can snap out of the matrix too. For some of them lightbulbs go off, but for others they’re stuck in the same cycles of abusive, unavailable, & low quality men.

[@kimcham9949]

👍🏾God bless you. 💯❤️

[@Ducky190]

Just shines light on the mediocre men in our community along with their desperate pick me women that will continue to provide for them while getting treated like crap. Dogs get better treatment. I'm glad she said what she said and she said nothing wrong. She along with all women who want the same things need a provider and a protector. If a man can not bring those things into the relationship than a woman is better off staying single. We value peace of mind and mental health over here.

[@vashtikelly6837]

DAMN RIGHT.....

[@dajawnchriscross]

“I’ll see you when you wake the f up” CRYING 😭😭

[@SGzCMH]

Hit dogs do holla! A lot of BM don't want to be served the same thing they dish out. This is a prime example of that. If we are all "free and independent thinking" people we all should be allowed to have preferences regardless if others like them or not.

[@anime-nn9kl]

Girl. Your comment about “my daddy was a trash man” had me HOLLERING!!!!! New subbie!

[@manicage]

My older co-worker (fellow black woman) literally said to me, "It is better to have a piece of a man than have nobody in your corner." My jaw literally dropped. First time I was speechless in a while

[@etherealdreams7546]

Omg that’s so sick that she actually said that and was trying to pass that mess on to u to be desperate like her. I’ve heard of this saying before but I’ve never actually heard of someone saying it in real life and in real time especially nowadays that’s so sad

[@callmecanolli322]

When I was young in the 5th grade, my bff’s mother who is Puerto Rican told me that “if your husband doesn’t beat you, he doesn’t really love you.” Older women speak from a place of broken pain. Give them respect and grace as you ignore foolishness like this.

[@etherealdreams7546]

@@callmecanolli322 oh my gawd girl that’s sick and so terrible that she literally said that to u as a child, trying to condition u early to think that that was right 😳🥴. And nah I don’t think we owe them respect for their foolishness, a bit or grace sure but respect isn’t something they deserve for their foolishness lol

[@ebonymay7906]

“What do u bring to the table ?” She tells them She’s beautiful doesn’t have children educated in shape and wears her real natural long hair Well you’re masculine lower your standards and date a bus boy Yea because how dare she want another doctor or lawyer like her ? She told y’all what she brings to the table she shows y’all and now they’re mad they themselves can bring salt nor pepper to the table !

[@сырпошехонский]

She's nothing special lookwise, she's 40, her fertility is almost gone, and her personality is abrasive and combative.

[@ebonymay7906]

Men her age usually have children already she can be a wife to a man who doesn’t want anymore children it’s not that hard to get one of those. She’s not combative if she’s defending everyone attacking her. Combative is being problematic and provoking I’m not seeing this here and we don’t know what kind of lover she is behind closed doors. Lastly she has money are can always get fertility treatments or is possible for a woman even in her 40’s to have a baby if she really put effort towards it

[@сырпошехонский]

@@ebonymay7906 Even if a man doesn't want children he usually prefers a younger women, especially when he's successful and has a lot of options. And, of course, we don't know for sure what her personality is behind the closed doors. But in this video she looks jaded and disagreeable. These are not the qualities which high-value men seek. They want a woman who makes their life easier, not harder. The situation is actually very simple - by becoming a high-profile millionaire lawyer in her late 30s, she has priced herself out of the relationship market. In other words, she has become a man she would like to marry. Unfortunately, there is no solution for her. Dating a bus driver aka an average man won't do, as she will be unhappy and will make his life miserable, too.

[@ece282]

@@сырпошехонский while men do date down more than women do, most successful marry women from their own socioeconomic backgrounds. and many older women still get married,,, younger women don’t prefer old men,, outside of getting money in exchange,,, those marriages with old men have the highest divorce rates,,, so young women don’t prefer old/used men regardless of what the males like you are “guessing” those men want. old males have declining fertility aswell, sperm count decreases with age and genetic mutations increase,erectile dysfunction, balding, heart disease, prostate issues etc,,, advantage paternal age is one of the biggest causes of genetic defects in fetuses(autism and down syndrome),, men are more likely to engage in risk taking activities like drugs, alcohol that deteriorates their dna as they age. men statistically have a shorter lifespan than women so to have kids late isn’t good, young healthier men will be the ones that have to help the mother raise them 😢. and lastly, if you are a poor male at the bottom don’t speak for rich or ambitious men, money and good lifestyle keeps rich people looking good longer,,, the women the majority of those men date and marry are in their age range,,, those women live well and age well become because they are not stressed by poverty peen, and doing 100 percent of the childrearing and emotional labor of a relationship,,, the successful ambitious man has made her life easier. those men are smart enough to want an equally yoked peer who is willing to stay long term and is not using him for his money, there are studies to show men prefer women within there age range for long term relationships. Cope. Seethe. 🌝💅🏽

[@ece282]

@@ebonymay7906 yes women are having more kids after 40s and even 50s now, alot more older women are marrying and starting families with younger men to. ex: Sam and Aaron Taylor Johnson 💋🌝

[@fabhousevegas7369]

Keep speaking truths no one cares about the the objectors. I am elated we are finally having these conversations. I have been getting the Iyanla treatment from mammy’s in my family. This shows we are not all the same and should not be talked to or treated the same!!!

[@tamaramtl2024]

She was asked a question and she answered her TRUTH . Nobody owns Eboni ! She's a grown woman with grown choices. Go Eboni go ! ❤

[@monae1297]

Hey Chrissie, I just wanted to say you’re my absolute favorite. I have been watching you since I was a freshman in high school I’m now a junior in college. Being that I didn’t have a parental figure you’re like a big sister to me and I just want to say thank you for giving me the information and having this channel I’ve learned a lot and grown a lot.❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ (Ps.Amazing video as usual )

[@kimcham9949]

👍🏾 This is really *sweet* .😊😊

[@beemocha]

Excellent video❤ Gurl I was waiting on your response to the the melee like a cr**k head waitin on their next hit

[@softblackwoman]

This ☝🏾

[@50sizfabulous75]

Chrissie you’re right we’re not allowed to have standards That’s the underlying message But I like the young women are bucking the system

[@SpokenIntoExistence]

When BET “honored” Kevin, I knew Bet was definitely full of shit. They lost me with that.

[@brendacook5103]

Have you noticed that Black women are the only group who are discouraged from having standards and criteria regarding the men they date or marry? On the other hand, Black men have very specific criteria for the type of BLACK women they choose to date. But when it comes to White, Latina, or Asian women, Black men’s ONLY criteria is that the woman is not Black.

[@brendacook5103]

Iylanya is the least qualified to give dating advice. She married down three times. She ended up with a broken jaw in one marriage and ultimately became a single, baby momma after her last divorce. She is a pick me/mammy/Black manosphere warrior that Black men would not choose as their preference.

[@pricillamiza8378]

Chrissie: "bm want to be women so much they looking at finances 2 " 😂😂😂.

[@kitejohnson515]

Just a few years ago a bw lawyer named Courtney got with a black nan wth no profession and he deleted her snh

[@stefaniegueye693]

The reason many black men are upset is because Ebony fits the desirability critique. She has the look that they aspire to have on their arm. However, she is sharp and has the freedom to choose who she deems worthy due to having her own financial agency. I love it😂😂😂😂😂

[@m.s9146]

I’m from a family of black professionals and business owners. My niece married an up and coming DJ who finally became a bus driver. He is a nice man and intelligent but our family has never accepted him. My niece is vivacious, shapely, witty and very cute. She was engaged to a med student who became a wealthy and successful doctor but rebounded during a break up. Think long and hard about bringing a blue collar person into a family of professionals. I’m an older black woman, and agree that it’s unnecessary to take abuse from any man, black or white.

[@LolaBugzy85]

Something almost similar in my family. A cousin of mine married down and I told the brother the sister married down. She is doing extremely well abroad and works for a big corporation. She makes big time money. The guy she is married to does delivery work. She clearly maintains him. What even shocked me is that she is so desperate to stay married to the guy to an extent she is now catering to the hubby's ex wife bills to avoid her from interfering in their marriage. It's so sad that some black women are stopping so low. To make it worse my hubby was supporting what she is doing. I told him dude that means you dnt get that black women get tired of catering to everyone. We want to be loved , provided for and protected.

[@etherealdreams7546]

@m.s9146 would u say that your family has those standards for men only or is it for women too, and what I mean is if a man from your family was to marry a woman who wasn’t a professional and didn’t make the type of money he does would they not accept her too? Or do they only judge men by those standards? I’m asking because I think men should be judged for their success/money and being able to be providers but I don’t think women should be judged for that in that same way so that’s why I was curious if your family judged women the same as men when it comes to socio-economic status & class

[@m.s9146]

@@etherealdreams7546 yes, but sadly, my family is also colorist, so as long as the woman is light skinned with Caucasian looking hair and features she will be accepted. Of course she can’t be ghetto but if she is reasonably well spoken and moderately intelligent she will survive. Men on the other hand can be any complexion as long as they are professionally successful.

[@etherealdreams7546]

@@m.s9146 oh wow so are u saying if the woman is light or white looking as long as she’s reasonably intelligent and well spoken they don’t care what her career is or if she’s professionally successful?

[@daphnejoseph584]

Telling not to date outside my race I’ll date outside my race