What the avoidant experiences during no contact

#nocontact #breakup #discard #heartbroken #avoidant #dating #relationship #avoidantattachment #relationshipcoach #insecureattachment #situationship #dismissiveavoidant #fearfulavoidant #attachment #emotionallyunavailable #divorce

[@guywithahelmet9597]

She won’t reach out. Even if she did… I wouldn’t take her back. I did my best and she still ran away. I’m on to better things.

[@NewyJon7787]

I can relate, man, keep your head high, and find someone who will love you back.

[@gregorystinette8271]

Just get a dog and be happy. Woof !

[@montserratpuebla4629]

Yes to min. 7:50. This is my experience with my ex-husband. He jumped quickly into a new relationship and he started to manifest nostalgia (sending old photographs to our children) and complimenting me. Really weird and immature.

[@rashadm.sadigov4366]

Again i am the first to comment. Coach I deserve 1 hour of free coaching.

[@alanrodriguez210]

They take a while to reach out. In my current case, it's been more than three months without a beep from her. But the time is useful to think of them from a more neutral perspective. Constructive criticism coach: you really need to turn up the volume for your videos (or hire someone to do that for you)

[@cfnaround1585]

I laid out the boundaries when she came back. She took them away, so I walked away

[@vaultboy911]

How long was it before she came back?

[@addict7045]

I walked away, it hurts so much. But for some reason i feel free.

[@VJ-ul1eq]

he broke up with me two days ago, i blocked him, now he's sending me a friend request on FB? i don't understand these people...

[@remyd1984]

You both sound young

[@ld921]

@@remyd1984young and immature

[@tabarnakopoulos]

Tell me why should I pursue someone who discarded me out of the blue?

[@cindyanne11]

You shouldn't. Don't.

[@Marlin-mn9xe]

Why would you want to go back to a person that put you trough all That emotional Abuse

[@ayomikokila271]

Why some avoidants are extremely into religion?

[@daniele1296]

Because we can't hide from God (and yes, we tried and failed). Even a relationship with God is painful.

[@adriennelatimer2491]

What are the differences between men and women avoidants

[@Laura-um3ub]

This makes sense, for an avoidant.

[@joeskwara5823]

What happens if the anxious had dumped the avoidant prior for a few days?

[@Greentea4591]

Does no contact work on a DA ex if I took a year and a half before I told him not to contact me anymore and started no contact? He sent me a breadcrumb at 30 days which I ignored and then it was his bday at 45days NC so I sent a best wishes bday message (just to be respectful because he does still pay some bills for me too) he replied thank you as I expected he would (neither of us tried to engage more) that was 3 days ago. Did that reset the clock on no contact? Do you think he is still experiencing the same things you describe in this video that apply to a more recent break up? We were together for 10yrs but never lived together before he ended it. He still pays my rent but doesn’t want to see me at all anymore (he makes excuses as to why like he is too busy or tired. He won’t say directly he doesn’t like me or want me to leave him alone he just says he cant have a healthy relationship anymore so I assume he is dating someone else and doesn’t want to tell me for some reason)

[@devonjahnjez]

That best wishes message during his bday messed up the NC now he has the upper hand it’s a power thing.

[@Greentea4591]

@@devonjahnjez You think? I can see it resetting the no contact time but I don’t think he has any upper hand. He sent me a breadcrumb a few hours after I sent the bday message which I ignored, and another breadcrumb a week later which I ignored. (His breadcrumbs say he has been thinking of me and he gives updates on his life) I have not replied, so how does he have the upper hand? I feel like I breadcrumbed him with the bday message in a way.

[@Amywithouse9909]

Can they still go through these stages if they immediately just into a new relationship?

[@lukamatic5498]

That means that they are monkey branching. He said thaf monkey branches rarely reach out probably beacuse them num themself with new relationships

[@tonygueug4342]

🙏🙏✨✨👍👍♥♥

[@cindyanne11]

Me, an avoidant, with an anxious partner who will not let me go, threatens to unalive himself if I leave, cries, begs, yells, guilt-trips, and makes me feel ike absolute shitte, thinking about showing this video to him so he'll believe that letting me finally go will actually bring me back. *wink wink .

[@cindyanne11]

Although the more I read about avoidants in these comments, I am starting to wonder if I'm actually normal and he's... something else. :(

[@nomadhitch579]

He is not normal, but neither is sending him this video to attempt to manipulate him into leaving to give him false hope. He definitely needs help though and that behavior isn't excuseable.

[@cindyanne11]

@@nomadhitch579 yeah, I never would actually do it, it was a desperate thought. I feel very trapped.

[@Greentea4591]

@@cindyanne11I actually think that might be a good idea. He is addicted to you in a way and he needs no contact with you for at least 2 months I think to get a hold of himself. Sending him no contact videos that say u need 6months no contact from avoidants and you need to work on yourself to get an avoidant back might help. I don’t think its a bad idea he needs to get a hold of himself

[@susannefitzpatrick9955]

We are literally howling with laughter - that salmon sticking out of his ears has got to be the funniest thing on KZbin. I’ve forwarded it to all my friends so they can watch with the sound turned off. Hilarious.