What The Hell Are Livestock Auctioneers Actually Saying?

“We are the music to the sale.”
That’s how full-time auctioneer - and the 2014 World Livestock Auctioneer champion - Baine Lotz explains his job. This year, the annual event, hosted by the Livestock Marketing Association since 1963, drew 31 semi-finalists who competed by selling cattle at the Bloomington Livestock Exchange in Wisconsin. The competition attracts cattle buyers and sellers as well as fans who come strictly to take in the spectacle. But the cowboy hat-festooned contestants take their fast-talking pretty seriously.
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[@VICENews]

We went to the World Livestock Auctioneer Championship in Bloomington, Wisconsin to find out. Watch Next: This Comedy Duo Got Sued For Pranking The News - bit.ly/2GvEUUi

[@1121494]

Is this actually a World Championship, or is it an American Competition of Americans pretending to be the entire world again?

[@tonymac1971]

I was just about to say that

[@tonymac1971]

Where are the Australians if this is a world competition Australia has a massive livestock industry

[@m.angelrenteria7569]

Canadians are awesome, only if they truly pledged loyalty to the rest of America. Instead of across the lake.

[@cassiandramitchell4403]

VI CE News

[@BeausArts]

Auctions like these are super stressing, cause you could scratch ur nose and then You own 100 cows

[@truthsmiles]

Nothing to worry about. If you're a complete noob (as I have been), they know it, and probably won't even pay attention to you unless you make a real effort to get noticed. In my case (I probably only buy 1-2 cows a year), if I want to bid, I shoot my hand up and hold my card up high until the auctioneer acknowledges the bid. I even sometimes have to wave to get his attention. Then, once he knows I'm 'in the running', a simple wave or nod will continue the bidding. I shake my head if I'm done. What you're probably thinking of is the professional buyers, who buy cattle for multiple large operators and bid on probably 80% of the cattle at a given auction (sometimes more). These guys have a special relationship with the auctioneer, who sees them every week. When such a buyer is present, the auctioneer will often 'check in' with them to see if there's interest, often registered, as you say, with a little hand flick or some hardly noticeable gesture... it's the kind of natural thing that happens when you know someone really well and can 'read their mind' just by the expression on their face. So, if you're ever contemplating going to an auction, don't worry - scratching your nose won't commit you to buying 100 head of cattle :-) And worst case, if you DO accidentally buy a cow, you can always just say "I changed my mind, run her through again", which means you want to sell her immediately and they'll just re-auction her. Sure, you might lose $100 in the transaction, but you won't have to figure out how to fit a cow in the trunk of your Honda Civic :-)

[@tagyouritification]

@@truthsmiles I like your comment, truth with a tad of humor 🙂

[@bengarbaag7114]

I once bought a truck because a fly landed on my nose. It happens.

[@edmundprice5276]

there is no cow level

[@elmamiihen2153]

that's cheating

[@JagTheRipper]

"What are some of the challenges in this Industry?" "We need to target more vegetarians." That part was hilarious.

[@user-sf4fy8bq1h]

Right lol? Oof, he got hit with the dumb stick

@@user-sf4fy8bq1h Yeah, the guy sounded like he was suffering from veganism or another severe mental sickness.

[@user-sf4fy8bq1h]

@ ...huh? I can tell you're trying _really_ hard to insult someone, but I genuinely can't tell who the target is. The desperation comes across loud and clear, though!

[@user-sf4fy8bq1h]

@ You wanna offer some clarification on the intended target of that woefully miscrafted barb?

[@user-sf4fy8bq1h]

@ That's alright! Better luck next time, hon.

[@Designed1]

Me: What's the WiFi password? Friend: It's on the back of the router The back of the router:

[@phillip9798]

Underrated

[@hgfxjnn]

That's so me.... I have my router for 3 years now, and never changed the manufacture's Wifi password 😂

[@Mysterio1500]

Jokes on you i use my neighbours wifi without them knowing

[@oliverseoliverse]

Lolol

[@iqbal55]

Hahahahahaha

[@cristianleija7107]

Did anybody else think that they were going to answer the questions with the auctioneer voice?!

[@aliyare349]

I was very disappointed when they started talking normal.

[@pallee3971]

I thought they were going to tell me what the auctioneer was saying !!! I still don't know what bid they are asking for.

[@ashleyvonier1571]

@@pallee3971 they start at a base number and go up by certain dollar amounts so the number they're repeating is the current bid some will say "do I hear a 100" and go until you hear a YEP and then the raise the amounts

[@alainportant6412]

yes

[@sakuyagiorno5843]

Maybe the video was slowed down by 900% in post production.

[@imnotaweeb8935]

Top 10 rappers Eminem’s too afraid to diss

[@tundranone8366]

I need this to be a real video if it's not. 😆

[@talaverajr391]

@@tundranone8366 stfu

[@willtheprodigy3819]

Talavera jr No you

[@ch.illmatic]

More like top 31😂

[@talaverajr391]

@IAmGiornoGiovanna stfu

[@djclawson]

"We need to reach the people who are eating vegetables for every meal."

[@PenneyThoughts]

I know right! lol Notice how about 90% of the older white guys in the vid all have that big ol' beef belly, maybe they should put some more veggies on the plate.

[@Stew_Pid]

You're mistaking beef belly for carbs, mainly beer.

[@aurijustriksys2695]

Carbs is the best way to stay fit, it's the processed carbs like sugar you need to avoid, otherwise complex-carbohydrates (grains, legumes) and simple-carbs from fruits, veggies make you fit and energetic.

[@Stew_Pid]

Aurijus Trikšys carbs dont make you fit. Carbs are fuel to help you get fit. However too many carbs, of any kind, can make you fat. They dont have to be overly processed. There are plenty of fat vegans who love sweet potatoes.

[@milamarshall9597]

Alpha Centauri carbs definitely can make you fat. Eat potatoes every day and see how fat you get. Carbs are just sugar.

[@samisavage891]

4:05 the music as the humping cows walk past made me cry laughing

[@theultraatomicgamer]

Me too

[@jonathanwilliams1065]

This bull is just casually fucking the cow

[@cartermccauley7352]

That’s actually a girl when cows are in tight spaces they will ride each other. Not gay cows but just natural

[@cartermccauley7352]

@Craig Boothill yeah

[@tacomas9602]

@Craig Boothill see it all the time here working with heifers, it's my understanding the smell of the animal being in heat will attract other animals even if they're also a female cattle species lol

[@agn728]

I want to see a version of a prank show where these dudes go undercover in like downtown Detroit or Philly on open mic night and drop some fast bars and watch the whole hood go crazy 😂

[@Truckerdaddy]

Could you imagine Twista, Tech N9ne, or Busta Rhymes as auctioneer.

[@6Texasboi]

There's a video on KZbin of auctioneers with rap beats playing and it's hilarious

[@MistressGlowWorm]

@@TruckerdaddyTwista held a world record for the fastest rap so my money would be on him.

[@makerstudios5456]

Its funny that they mostly speak slow as hell when regularly talking.

[@valeera5415]

we do that so dimwits like you can understand us

[@tolazytooplay7295]

@@valeera5415 you say "we" as if ur an auctioneer

[@valeera5415]

@@tolazytooplay7295 just on tuesdays at a local cattle auction , have to stay till all cows are sold , sometimes go on till midnight

[@primodei]

Love the Southerner Accent too!

[@feraldeercolony]

they gotta take a rest at some point, man.

[@lucid_sound_design]

"If you see a turtle on top of a fence post, it didn't get there by itself. And uh... I'm that turtle" This the funniest shit I've heard all day

[@solhamer3502]

A friend down South once told me: 'Huhbedadad50badanow100bdbdbd50bdbdbb100now150bdnan200'

[@jaynelson9543]

Besides pickle rick

[@danadomino]

IDK if you've ever seen the movie catch me if you can but I reminds me of the "two little mice fell into a bucket of cream" speech that the dad gives towards the start of the movie lol

[@masamune3064]

@@solhamer3502 damn you for cracking me up

[@davidjones3165]

If you've ever owned turtles you know those suckers can climb

[@Lomhow]

The guy who answered "disease" when it came to the threat to the live stock community was absolutely right

[@MistressGlowWorm]

Disease contact tracing. That one was a brilliant response. It’s a big issue from what I understand?

[@happygrass5]

That Amish brotherhood just adds to the legitimacy of this entire world I've never ever thought existed

[@JohnSmith-ms4xd]

how do amish guys make it more legitimate?

[@Addictedtocollecting01]

@@JohnSmith-ms4xd I don't know....they just do

[@everett7812]

@@JohnSmith-ms4xd more authentic I guess haha

[@britishzulu532]

@@Addictedtocollecting01 YES

[@britishzulu532]

@@JohnSmith-ms4xd Cuse they do

[@who818]

I always wondered what the male version of a beauty pageant would be like.....question answered

[@samlodestro2850]

I always thought it would be bodybuilding

[@lukequinlan4523]

You don't sell beauty queens lol

[@Manicmanuel]

still none ot their suits fit....... the trousers are the worst part

[@juliweizen1759]

@@lukequinlan4523 I think jovan turner meant the auctioneer championchip and not the auctions^^

[@lukequinlan4523]

@@juliweizen1759 ahhhhh

[@JorgeGeorgeD]

"I'm that turtle". - Jared Miller, 2018 WLAC Champion.

[@AntonioKowatsch]

That's what Jeb Bush said... LOL

[@fenrirgg]

Aren't we all that turtle?

[@SuzanneKowalski]

I like turtles!

[@n0denz]

It's actually really poetic when you think about it. The saying means that if you see someone with a great achievement, then he didn't get there by himself. Jared then juxtaposes himself, a vocal speed demon, with a turtle, obviously known for being slow. In all, it's a show of both humility and wit.

[@jirehjirehjirehjireh]

TetrisClock That is indeed true...he’s also that turtle.

[@Hellooo134]

I love the huge drop in energy in the room when they announced it because everyone collectively realized they lost

[@BlackoutPatriot]

They got outbid lol

[@felixm868]

4:36 man was living 2 years ahead of everyone

[@wliaputs]

He saw it

[@Literallyryangosling777]

When the man is sus

[@adammaulana3314]

No man, the place is pretty stinks u know...

[@idkidc7513]

Nah man, it's called basic health care knowledge. If you're sick then you have to take care of yourself and the others

[@animaanimus8011]

Probably on chemo. I’ve been on chemo off and on for five years and have had to wear a mask because it ruins your immune system.

[@Barrenge]

Obviously the hat is everything...

[@BayuAH]

I knew it! There something with the hat.

[@martincurtis2257]

What

[@wcaz]

It’s that hat boot combo

[@syxx242]

gotta wear a Stetson !

[@Johnnycdrums]

Hat's ain't cheap.

[@jhondoux84]

men with great hats {a short film}

[@luckym0nk3y]

Jhon Doux lol

[@faceindisguise85]

Best comment

[@cioccolato8148]

actually lolled

[@ButchBirdie]

Awww I wanted the main guy to win, he seems so nice. Also LMAOOO 4:06 WITH THE CHOIR IN THE BACKGROUND AND EVERYTHING

[@buchanfoulsham6314]

He went on to become champion the next year mate, I git a bit emotionally invested myself and googled him to check!

[@mariam19554]

be rootin be tootin but most importantly _be kind_

[@KingreX32]

...........kootin...?!!?!

[@shortievid]

It's the hat. The power comes for the Hat. 🤠🤠

[@alexjohnward]

In Australia they might have a really worn out hat, to show they don't make much commission.

[@jpeg.600x2]

*from

[@hardpack187]

Eeuuh it's like a switch...like a machine

[@ME-wu9dy]

Yee haw

[@keremkelleboz6959]

*Texas intesifies*

[@user-sf4fy8bq1h]

Wasn't this in Wisconsin, though?

[@Kato_The_Snowman]

As a Texan I approve this message

[@jdogexe]

As a Texan too, I approve of this message

[@maddiehall5317]

As a texan three, I approve this message

[@OldDanTucker]

Not a Texan, but I approve of this message.

[@redcar9949]

1:07 30 auctioneers can somehow replicate the sounds of a middle school cafeteria filled with 300-400 kids

[@PlatinumEagleStudios]

Dude someone get this guy a record deal. He spits MAD bars at 6:06

[@JorgeCanovas]

All you need to do is get him to literally SPEAK rap lyrics at that speed. He’d literally whoop Busta Rhymes ass. Automatic GRAMMY nomination.

[@morgana8037]

Busta rhymes? man, that's nothin. I'm afraid he'd beat Eminem's ass in a rap battle...

[@nessmastergengar4686]

Who else heard "Doug Dimadome"

[@nayelip2388]

Owner of the dimsdale dimadome?

[@HEWHOTAWNS]

@@nayelip2388 that's right! Doug Dimmadome! Owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome!

[@raymondboop4069]

NessMasterGengar! ! The same Doug Dimmadome the owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome where they're showing Crash nebula on ice?

[@morningowl4768]

On ice?

[@Clauds1005]

You guys made my day. Love y’all

[@NosillaWilla]

This was way too short. Damnit Vice. I could have watched this for ages

[@AnthonyTNT85]

Fr lol I like wagchi g things like this, even though it isn't in our interests or everyday life or anything it's amazing/fascinating, VICE lol

[@johnmanigold1840]

I too use my time wisely

[@empty_melon6974]

Not even 10 mins man

[@bently629]

Me too

[@frederickballard8510]

Idk how i got here but Im high and this is orgasmic

[@theskeletonappearsinthisco5896]

''when a girl talks slowly to you its a sign she likes you'' girls talking to me: 0:10

[@RebelGaming4U]

You a CPP fan? Just asking bc I noticed the profile pic.

[@marinewauquier8630]

Vice news answering questions my French highschool student ass never knew could be asked

[@Hiskielolilol]

Merci ! Me sens moins seule

[@MrJorge6986]

Don’t worry old timer. You are world champion to me :)

[@levinausley288]

Jorge Egroj should have won

[@munis002]

I know right

[@johnsajeth1018]

That glorious music while the bull was trying to smash... I wished I had that instrumental when smashing lol.

[@thoughts_empty]

Lol

[@ja_se]

😂

[@TheRsktek]

That was not a bull...

[@Smoobloob]

Hey man people been playing Brown Sugar and such when they smash since the 90s no reason you can't do that with this tune.

[@bark1actual785]

Literally came across this comment and looked up just in time to see it go down

[@carlys1391]

My family owns an auction business and we sell construction equipment. After ten years of listening to the auctioneers, I know exactly what they’re saying 😄

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@otaviofrn_adv]

Congratulations. You're fluent in auctioneering

[@JorgeCanovas]

You are blessed.

[@timothyberry9084]

My friend that does auctioneering will throw in buy me a beer and stuff like that and it's halarious when you actually catch him saying it

[@JorgeCanovas]

I love it 🤣

[@fundude4566]

Was reading recently. Did you know that 35% of Auctioneers have a net worth of a $1 million or more?

[@emileroberge9459]

Andrew Taylor wow

[@earlspencer7863]

How?

[@user-xj2sm3xd5l]

Holy hell I need to start practicing talking that fast

[@andykeller3737]

Millionaire next door?

[@fundude4566]

Andy Keller Correct

[@kabascoolr]

Whoever edited this needs an award.

[@patrickm5217]

The award is a sweet job at vice

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@vdd4399]

His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy. There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti · He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready

[@adventureguy4119]

To sell cows

[@bibianaguadalupeislasherre9880]

*Starts singing* 🎶🎤

[@louistracy6964]

@@Glooze I'll buy that.

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@mrjazz2570]

The guy at 5:47 has the nicest sounding voice in the world

[@MisterTingles]

a bowlcut, a unibrow *AND* a mouthbreather?! how does that guy keep the ladies off himself without carrying a sharp stick everywhere he goes?

[@ashscott6068]

This is why arranged marriages are a thing. Though, I suspect his will be one of the last to be arranged

[@jdz9952]

An alpha male

[@caramelcoffees]

bruh I'm crying 😂

[@chanekawaihae7540]

MrTingles LMFAO

[@averagedude9378]

Time stamp?

[@Metonymy1979]

"Turtle on top of a fence post" best quote ever

[@zoki.to974]

there is a video of turtle (or tortoise) climbing over chicken fence at least 6ft tall....

[@kingwalton9598]

Metonymy1979 FC dugongs I am

[@omw2fyb363]

the person down south who told him that must've​ been high asf

[@412hwc]

Metonymy1979 beat quote ever is what my boss told me once, me and his son were getting our ass whooped with a frame for tha scaffold and he said damn yall look like two turtles fuccin a football 😂

[@edcrfvtgbyhnujmikolpqazwsx]

I'm not as impressed by their ability to speak like that, as I am of the people in the audience who are able to understand them.

[@tyemaddog]

I don't think anyone can understand them haha. Such a bizarre thing. Like it can't actually make any difference on people's bids can it?? 🤔

[@lucky43113]

@@tyemaddog Its easy to understand and yes they make you want to bid more

[@0554joe]

I mean, as long as you can hear the numbers, and know what the current bid is, everything else doesn’t seem to matter

[@canada420mma]

@Zero friends damn, that's crazy

[@saltMagic]

The speed gets the buyers anxious to get more involved. It’s psychological…they aren’t actually even saying words but just the numbers

[@nitroromero7172]

This is some hypnosis right here. Went into an auction just to watch, walked out owning 60 cows. 🤣

[@ijuldzulfadli903]

4:05 what you guys really looking for

[@donharrus9994]

Cat , meow no thats what the Amish dude's lookn for...something to bang n hang

[@904czv4]

Lol 😆

[@zapataboxing861]

Hajajja

[@tannyocean9984]

the classical music is what makes it better

[@rzkzkr20]

10 seconds into video I see this comment, I click and see a majestic scene and sound.

[@alfred3299]

0:38 Damn that unibrow game strong af

[@pseudonymousbeing987]

Jealous?

[@lopan776]

No joke man that brow thicker than the great wall of china

[@sebg6865]

I had to rewind cause he was so ugly

[@lopan776]

In his world tho that brow be pulling all the hoes

[@TheBaldOne]

I wish my mustache was that thicc

[@GundamFlexing]

*Top 10 mumble rappers you've never heard of*

[@alejandrozuniga4426]

i understand more these guys than many mumble rappers

[@azrulnajmi4062]

bloody hell they are more clear than mumble rappers you just need to focus and keep up.

[@marleyboy7732]

My daddy never told me the story about the turtle on a fence post. He told me if I could piss on the hotwire and walk away standing. I would be a real man....That was a bad day. But dad never stopped laughing again.

[@LaurieAnnCurry]

We might have said this to my nephew one day; might have……………. We’re still laughing

[@marleyboy7732]

@@LaurieAnnCurry 🤣🤣🤣

[@alienfire223]

I don't know if Vice was intending to make this a parody or it was all just lighthearted editing. I actually thought this story was insightful and interesting.

[@JackgarPrime]

I think it was just a lighthearted thing. The guys themselves didn't take it overly serious so I guess they figured it was fine to have some fun with it. Like the humping shot.

[@seventeen9718]

It's really well done. Like you said, some light-hearted fun that doesn't at all detract from the entertainment value. Not too much judgement, just a well made, interesting, short doc. Good job, Vice.

[@hipsterimagestudios6349]

This would make an incredible anime

[@Supectible]

HipsterImage Studios nani?

[@alexcastro8425]

It already is. Have you heard people in Death March to The Parallel World Rhapsody casting spells?

[@sistermoonchildyoga9286]

thats the smartest fucking thing I've ever heard

[@londyn9314]

Yes

[@0prahTV]

I hope it has a hot springs episode

[@MrCrashsystem]

2 questions. 1: have you ever thought about an alternative career as a rapper? 2: is the hat mandatory?

[@gil9905]

I didn't know a competition like this existed... But this is so freaking cool!!!

[@nataliyakhmil6693]

This is just a pageant for guys in cowboy hats

[@koichihirose7691]

I will not like your comment OK

[@koichihirose7691]

Because 69 you know

[@baconbitz7937]

Ki adi Mundi Thanks for replying this. I almost liked it

[@livewellwitheds6885]

🤣

[@Melissa0774]

I think that's a good thing. There should be more pageants for men.

[@val.s2866]

I accidentally clicked on this video but i just kept watching

[@syproful]

There is no accidental clicking. The great algorithm made you click it. Maybe, you now actually are a cow seller yourself. So many years later.

[@cooldude79]

1:08 when the teacher gets kicked out of the zoom meeting

[@MustangDesudiroz]

Lmao

[@MamaMielke]

BAHAHAHA

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

LOL! If you enjoy farming + humor, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@Alex-px9oy]

3:32 That *IS* Bill Gates, is it not?

[@jibrankhantareen7300]

No bruh the computer industry pays more than the farming business

[@Topic_____542]

Everybody has to have a hobbby

[@pramath_bhat]

To the guy on who this documentary was based on.... You are the winner for me...

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@miskolinaccc]

This is one of the best videos you have put on the KZbin lately, surely, it's not really as thought-provoking as some other pieces, but it's still extremely enjoyable, especially the music background, well done!

[@TotalRookie_LV]

Absolutely agree. There is something enCHANTING about the sound composition of this piece.

[@ThatLoudCockatoo]

I know right? Everyone was out covering politics and social issues and one guy was just like I WANT TO TALK ABOUT LIVESTOCK AUCTIONEERS.

[@actuasco]

no, i want stories on trans babies

[@colonelcorazonsantiago7335]

The documenting of unique traditions, customs, lifestyles of people is important from a historical perspective. 100 years from now, people will look on this video with even more curiosity than we do today.

[@emill232]

The piece they where playing in the beginning was Dvorak's 9th symphony. The famous "new world symphony." The first movement I believe, but the last movement is the more well known.

[@fakrul7004]

Eminem: The fastest rapper Livestock Auctioneers: Hold my cow

[@rookincharge2780]

Oh hey, my sister went to college there. And when we landed in that tiny town, where only one plane can land at a time, a cow was chilling in a cornfield across the street from the front doors of the airport. Good times. Even left my Kindle and ipod on the plane. We turned around, and it was at the front desk. Thankfully the plane wouldn't leave until the next morning.

[@jmgmarcus808]

In thought they were going to answer the questions with their auction voice, that would have been awesome.

[@gianb3952]

Yeah me too lmao

[@jason4275]

*Someone need to make a mumble rap album with these guys, I bet these guys could spit BARS, without any profanity.*

[@orphfinthewizard1774]

Why it got to be rapping, stick too country, leave that garbage over there. Stay out of our culture vultures.

[@nggaknormal]

@@orphfinthewizard1774 PFFFFFFFFFFTTTT

[@leonardomateos5572]

Ooofff

[@Pfromm007]

@@leonardomateos5572 *leans in* - He's 'that' kind of wizard...

[@TimBryan]

My man at 4:37 was ahead of his time.

[@jokerraton8183]

So used to seeing them now that I didnt even notice

[@Mustacheman17]

mans really was

[@StefanMiller]

"If you see a turtle on top of a fence post, it didn't get there by itself. Welp, I'm that turtle." -Winston Churchill

[@champspg]

My guy Jay was getting a little choked up at the end there. Keep up the good work, Jay! You'll get 'em next year.

[@ezio_auditore5425]

The dudes at 4:34 look like members of Dwight Schrutes family from The Office lol

[@carloscarias6276]

I was gonna comment that 😂

[@Big_Doink]

this made my night

[@ezio_auditore5425]

@@Big_Doink you saying that made MY night

[@hindugoat2302]

0:38 check out that mono brow !

[@eryes2000]

Dude no kidding, I thought the same thing when I saw those dudes.

[@TripleIProductions]

2:23 - Took me a while to realize he wasn't speaking about fake beef between the auctioneers but ACTUAL fake beef. KZbin has ruined me.

[@cmiller9800]

the sound director for this video did an amazing job!

[@Dead_Last]

4:04 rofl The music and that Humping Bull

[@anu.]

Haha I thought i was the only one who noticed that!

[@TheElloatmatt]

LMFAOOOOOO

[@stifflers69mom1]

DeadLast he’s all up in those sugar walls

[@londyn9314]

Yes same here

[@stock2896]

I think they did that on purpose lol

[@LETOreptiles]

Lol those Amish guys in the crowd

[@donharrus9994]

Tom Drieskens they looking for a goat to bang n hang

[@ryanschaff123]

Omg did you see that persons who looks different, that’s hilarious!

[@niyingroger7179]

Thought as much🙄🙄🙄🙄

[@figlexgonzalez3115]

What’s funny about it?

[@justinmartin8887]

No way! Where!? Why!?

[@ReallyTY4Real]

Imagine if EVERYONE spoke in this tone, how awfull would lunch meetings be...

[@Antipodean33]

Gotta admit when I was a young fella and started going to auctions I got caught up in the whole atmosphere and till I learnt, I paid dearly for that enthusiasm. I remember heaps of people bidding and it was all going so fast, to be honest I didn't even know where the bid was, then all of a sudden it came to a screeching halt and the auctioneer looked me dead in the eye and said "you bought it son"

[@nicolaslanzoni9385]

Well , auctions must have changed a lot since then , because the atmosphere of the auctions shown in the video are just depressing. Every bidder shown in the video appears to be a empty husk of a person, completely devoid of any joy , they barely move their arms to signal for a bid, is like they are trying to do the least amount of movement necessary to be noticeable by the auctioneer, as if they are ashamed of doing so . The regret in the air is palpable, and I don't understand why... They stay like this all the time, even before placing a bid , what are they regretting??? You should consider yourself lucky , if you got caught up in the atmosphere shown in the video, buying an overpriced bovine would be the least of your problems lol

[@raimesey]

I love how Americans call themselves world champions of things only Americans do!

[@joshuachesney7552]

They're technically not wrong.

[@deadpicklechinahboi4777]

U mad?

[@_Gilles_]

Stems from their entitlement mentality

[@jaysekhon8014]

Open challenge to the rest of the world to come beat us at our games then ;)

[@mmcmann9539]

Well, we don't usually have American champions, we would have US or Canadian champions, etc.

[@em4957]

my grandpa was an auctioneer. top of his graduating class at auctioneer school. i was always mesmerized by the talent and skill it takes to be able to do this

[@livewellwitheds6885]

there are... schools? damn

[@DementedLycan]

@@livewellwitheds6885 yep. I was just as shocked as you were when I found out lol.

[@builderbbob]

“How now money now, 27 little cows” STRAIGHT BARS 🔥

[@faizantanoli7979]

That man at 6:10 was enjoying that moment more than anyone else in the whole planet. I can feel it♥

[@infini.tesimo]

They are rappers and don't even know it

[@JackgarPrime]

I wonder if Snow (the "Informer" guy) ever did any auctioneering? Seems like he'd be a natural.

[@welwitschia]

No! Them rappers are black folks, and these good folks ain't like them. Or some other racist excuse like that.

[@Alex-uy7pc]

Wait, auctioneers predate rap. So how do we know rappers arnt really just auctioneers?

[@londyn9314]

Yes

[@ig7002]

@@welwitschia What? You're the only person saying something racist lol.

[@highflop3464]

Did any one see what happens at 4:05 ?

[@mayhemcry]

I did. Lol together with that gregorian chant music hahaha

[@KayColeLynn]

Okay city boy not only do animals do that as a dominance thing but considering that cow was at auction it was most definitely a steer (castrated cow) not bull or at least a female in heat causing the Male or other female to get raled up and mount that specific cow

[@MJ-me5zd]

@@KayColeLynn is it just me or do you have an attitude for no reason or is that just me? The comment didnt say anything you needed to explain."city boy" as an insult because someone may not be educated about an issue makes you look like youre trying to divide people. For what? Im sure city people know more than you assume. My sister is a city girl and goes to farms to help out and has saved animals that the owners were neglecting. Where someone is from has nothing to do with what they "know"

[@favrerules04]

That heifer was getting her some BBC!

[@unlimitedperseverance1706]

@@KayColeLynn okay country hick

[@johnnygarcia33133]

Son: how was work today daddy. Auctioneer: ba biri bing bing bing bing bing bara bing bing bing bing bing sold some cows. ba barra bing biri bing bing bing bing bing binggggg pass the potatoe salad bobby.

[@dragonbutt]

Coming back to this. Whoever edited this video should be fucking PROUD. Its amazing and just fills one with such emotion and wonder, fitting given the role and importance of the life of an auctioneer.

[@n0denz]

You're a champ to me, Jay. Screw the interviews. You've got the industry in your heart, and I hear it in your voice.

[@ibetrollintheybehatin6857]

I raised my hand like 40 times and nothing happened

[@imonthewinningside8281]

Lol!

[@ibetrollintheybehatin6857]

@[Blank] [Blank] GREAT NAME, and yes lmao

[@Racingirl911]

LMAO!!!

[@em4957]

keep raising your hand and they’re gonna roll you... you’ll be bidding against yourself 😬

[@dimi_sf]

I watched their gibberish in 0.25x speed and it is mostly gibberish lol it’s like freaking hypnotizing those customers watching that with open mouths drooling. Like putting them into trance. Definitely respecting their awesome skill though!!

[@JamieAubrey]

No one: KZbin: What The Hell Are Livestock Auctioneers Actually Saying?

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@Ell355ar]

Came here to see a breakdown of an auctioneers speech with some useless fillers to get close to 10 mins. Got a great insight in a subculture I'd never though about. Perfect score 5/7

[@ianb8885]

What am i doing? I have an 8 am class tomorrow.

[@MrGmushnikov]

Realizing how much good auctioneers make

[@bonganimazibuko1901]

Ian B work report

[@waireads2712]

Did you go to your 8 am?

[@---nobody---]

Yeahh, we wanna know, did you make it to your class?

[@wildchild7764]

Ian B GO TO SLEEP

[@jnicholes79]

I love the one comment on challenges to the industry, and the response, “We need to reach those people eating only plants at every meal.” My friend, those customers are gone. This business is coming down who can produce protein in the most efficient way. How can we reduce the cost per calorie that we produce and sell. If a chicken takes 9 calories in to produce 1 calorie a consumer can purchase and eat, and that is the most efficient livestock we have, we are in a operating in a world of ineffective calorie production. We are in a production model that is old and dying as technology replaces us with more efficient methods, e.g. Memphis Meats, Beyond Meat and Impossible Meat, as examples. It’s simple, we are no longer in the livestock business. We are in the calorie manufacturing business, and our current way of manufacturing is old, broken, and steeped in stubborn tradition unwilling to change.

[@goseenathan]

That one guy at 4:37 wearing a mask threw me off for a second since this was filmed before covid.

[@shongsie]

4:06 so we’re just going to ignore that ?? aight

[@farisarrazi1200]

Lmao

[@KKISCRAZYFUL]

Someone's getting two for the price of one

[@Fluffy172]

I’m fuuuucking screaming lmfaooo!!!

[@Girrrrrrrr]

Came lookin fer this comment cant stop laughing

[@tawnystill8341]

It's like a male country pageant show

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

Ha! If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@21AMSL]

Nobody: Literally nobody: America:

[@dietfawn]

please make a funny joke at one point in time, hoestly nobody laughs at those shitty "nobody:" memes

[@MrHawkelement]

@@dietfawn If that were true, no one would repeat them. People repeat jokes and memes that they find funny. When was the last time you heard someone repeat a joke that they themselves didn't find funny?

[@colbymcgrath6421]

I mean Canada has livestock to

[@joedart1465]

I loved the operatic background. Great video.

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@motoquasi]

KZbin automatic captions fails this one.

[@lietsiyon3464]

It just says music

[@haanpham4667]

And 99% of non-native english speaker I guess.

[@DJAUDIO1]

See. Why did you have to do the viewers like that? We were all riding for Jay to win. I hope he comes back in 2019.

[@adamstampley7207]

At 4:05, any seriousness broke. Auctioneers should've been like: "Alright now, we got a 2-for-1 deal. These cows will NOT separate."

[@Shenanigans303]

This answered a lot of questions I didn't know I had about auctioneering. Thank you.

[@CountyLineCowpokes]

If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly KZbin channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical KZbin channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

[@Jonathan-bu7iv]

0:38 Bowl cut + unibrow. That is amazing. Also. I still don't understand what they're saying haha.

[@jetfire1099]

Tiep He’s Amish, it’s part of their culture

[@rm9308]

It's also cheap.

[@nate_kang]

AND he's a mouthbreather. Bet he's a chick magnet.

[@CathyGoes]

​@@nate_kang Apparently not a chick magnet. LOL He's completely clean shaven but looks to be of marriageable age. Clean shaven is unmarried for the Amish.

[@jerrycan5145]

@@CathyGoes r/woosh

[@thestudentofficial5483]

Some auctioneers should make Country Rap Album lol

[@georgewashington938]

No / we do not need those two kinds of music in the same paragraph

[@theshamelesskid2950]

Than Old Time Road happened

[@tziporah9788]

Four years ago when Vine was in its prime someone put popular hip hop tracks under auctioneers talking. I’m not sure what you search to find them, maybe auctioneer rap vine or something but I remember then actually going hard.

[@stevethecountrycook1227]

That would be CRAP!

[@georgewashington938]

@@mountainsky4279 correct - I was just going bigger

[@j.morgan4548]

“World Championship”. All contestants were from throughout the lower 48. Hardly a World Series.

[@PICKLECREW]

Can we just acknowledge the fact they casually pan the camera over 2 cows fuckn lol

[@johnc8327]

2:39 "We need to reach the people that are eating vegetables everyday for every meal".... lmfao!!!!

[@livewellwitheds6885]

I love he forgot the word for vegatatarian

[@illlli7469]

I hope he wins next year

[@Kyle-21-]

your name is what the auctioneers are saying

[@FedericoYu]

All I understood was: "Good afternoon, let's turn this beef into cash" The rest was gibberish..