What to do if you have Delayed Ejaculation

Have you ever had trouble with your orgasm? Do you find it hard to orgasm with your partner? In this video, I'll give you the reasons why DE happens and how to prevent it from happening in the future. 💪🏻Become a HIGH PERFORMANCE MALE www.caitlinvneal.com/high-per...
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00:00 Start
01:20 Why listen to a sex coach?
01:55 What is Delayed Ejaculation or DE?
04:00 The main cause of DE
05:20 The way you masturbate matters...
07:20 Do less!
08:30 Emotions that might come with DE
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#CaitlinV

[@seanfletcher2062]

Thank you for this. I have been suffering from this for a long time. It has actually ended my marriage. She thought it was her fault. I don’t watch a lot of porn. I always thought that there is something wrong with me. Glad to know that I am not alone.

[@andyhyatt8104]

Thanks! Best explanation I have heard so far.

[@Kamiyouni]

Everything she said is 100% correct.

[@stoborking]

I agree with everything Caitlin said. I feel like DE is caused by a combination of physical sensation/stimulation and psychological, especially when you get in your head and get worried about taking too long or not being able to finish. Especially when you get so close and then it goes. Ill-fitting condoms or ones that are too thick may also be a factor. But yeah too much porn and a death grip is a big issue. Thank you for addressing this topic, as it's not really talked about, especially compared to Premature ejaculation.

[@user-ci4bh5mx1n]

Unfortunately, any condom I've ever tried are real buzz killers in the Big O/ejaculation department. It's frustrating to the point of my avoiding sex with a condom altogether. In a long-term monogamous relationship with a post-menopausal woman, there's no longer a need. There's probably another advantage to getting older, but I can't think of it right now ;)

[@bphilipb]

I think this is an excellent topic so thanks for making a video on this. One thing that I didn't see mentioned is where our minds are when we go into sexual situations. For me, my DE was caused (or started) by performance anxiety and worrying about my partners pleasure that I wasn't in tune with my own body and my own pleasure. I wanted to make sure that they were enjoying it and reaching orgasm because that's all you hear about. Make sure she's ready, take your time, foreplay, and all of that which is great. I completely agree but for me, it got into my head and I wasn't allowing myself to relax enough to go over the edge to orgasm. As much as we need to make sure our partners are satisfied we have to be somewhat selfish for us to finish. That was my experience with DE and it sucked until I let myself relax then I was able to get to the finish line on a more consistent basis. Using lube if you masturbate is a huge one too.

[@NovakiSalem]

This is my experience as well. I get so focused on making sure my partners are having a good experience that I kind of forget about my own. I’m trying to cut down on porn and toy usage to get myself back to a normal baseline. I knew I had a problem whenever I saw my ultimate fantasy in front of me and then it’d take me 4 hours to finish.

[@ZenAkita]

LOVE the nail colors instead of 1 color! oh and um, THANK YOU!!! Marathon mode can be difficult

[@whistlemckean8552]

She hit the nail on the head I couldn’t have said it better myself

[@davidderus3474]

Thank you.This is the first time I have heard anyone address this subject that I have been dealing with for years - I Agree with everything that you have said , I also assumed it had something to do with prostate problems - Thanks again 🎉

[@larrysheppard42]

I normally last about an hour. I have brought this to the attention of 3 Doctors, each of them laughed at me and asked "What is the problem? Most guys would like that." This has been a problem since 17 when I first had sex (Im 58 now).

[@foca7550]

I feel your pain. I workout so I have the energy to power through it, but it really sucks.

[@AlexandriaTheSecond]

I'd rather have what you had rather than my own "premature ejaculation" 😅

[@MsLacieable]

Go to a Urinary doctor and say you're having problem because you want babies and you need to ejaculate faster for better chances. I think people take it more seriously when you mention you are trying for a baby.

[@Zetler]

Same. I thought I have superpowers but after a few years it turn out I’m broken while the ladies are having a blast. The advice being offered here doesn’t really work because the expectations have been set.

[@ErectileDysfunctionHelp]

Very insightful!

[@godfather9253]

i just want to say thanks so much i had this problem too long but your low cut top got me over it, thanks from the base to the tip ;)

[@michaelneal7377]

Thanks for uploading this video I learned a lot

[@CaitlinV]

Glad it was helpful!

[@amireles1117]

You are totally awesome I finally figured it out thank you so much

[@damnitface77]

What about men who are on SSRI medication? DE is a side effect of these medications and while the easy answer would be to come off the medication, if you are on an SSRI, it is likely necessary to keep taking them. As men are increasingly addressing their mental health issues, more men are going to be prescribed these meds and therefore more men (and younger) will be experiencing these side effects. It might be something to look into with your clients with DE- are they taking any SSRIs?

[@suponglongkumer5393]

Very helpful...👍

[@Inkbydaniel]

I have suffered from delayed ejaculation for a couple of years. Thanks for the tips. I’m going to try these and see what happens. Keep up the great work.!

[@Inkbydaniel]

Didn’t help. Turned out it was the Prozac I was taking. So talk to your doctor before you get advice anywhere else I guess I’m saying.

[@brianschwartz5357]

Hey CV - good luck with your new show on Discovery

[@CaitlinV]

Thank you!

[@troywalkes7196]

Thank you for your information

[@CaitlinV]

My pleasure!

[@TomMcDonaldatYahooDotCom]

Good info

[@gangadaranramalingam5107]

Brilliant

[@paulkibler]

Fantastic video! I suffered with this for years. Last september I turned off all porn. Stop using the death grip and change to a lubricated grip. Now I like to see how many days I can go before I damn near explode. DE and ED are no longer an issue in my life. I'll be happy to answer any questions if anybody has any.

[@davidjohncox7333]

There are several causes of DE: age (older you get, the more common it is); too much action, (either solo or paired); I agree masterbating to porn can influence it; also the “death grip” can desensitize your nerve endings, certain medications (i.e.-antidepressants). My partner LOVES me being able to last long, so it’s great for her! My urologist said there really isn’t any med that can help, although he mentioned possibly using Yohimbine, which I haven’t tried yet. Thanks for addressing this Caitlin! ❤️ U, girl!

[@MetroidHunter30001]

Yeah, im 30 and I go at it almost daily, Im a pretty Anxious and Emotional guy, so it certainly does affect my Mental Health, Trying to use a looser grip but when i feel myself getting close, I just Deathgrip it, Without Release it just leaves me frustrated! It can be overwhelming to change my habits...

[@marcellusdodge3001]

I discovered shaving desensitized me down there. DE went away when I stopped.

[@davidjohncox7333]

@@marcellusdodge3001 interesting!

[@rcaminos]

All these tips really helped me a lot. I also can’t oversell her suggestion of focusing on the sensation and pleasure during sex. I changed my mindset where the goal was about pleasure and the sensations, orgasm was just a bonus. And like she said… don’t over stimulate. If you keep trying and trying and it doesn’t happen, then stop, cuddle, drink some water, talk to your partner (not about sex necessarily) and if the moment strikes, then try again. I found that sometimes I’d be so… let’s say full, that i would ejaculate without an orgasm but then have sex again a few minutes later and have a really intense orgasm after.

[@marcolobos5055]

Hi Caitlin, I know visual Porn has a negative effect, but does erotica have the same effect?

[@hectorvicente7572]

You’re awesome 😎!

[@johnadm3479]

I am one of thous 4%

[@arekdbz3]

As a someone who can go for an hour easly, I agree that slowing down is the key. The faster and harder I thrust, the harder it becomes to come. Actually in those cases I have to pull out, chill for few minutes and do it gently. Then I come

[@adamdavidsonx]

Do you have any advice or suggestions for DE and ED that is caused by SSRI antipressants, in my case escitalopram? The biggest issue is DE because I can't finish 90% of the time. Switching to bupropion solved the issue but I had bad side effects, headaches, constantly agitated and quick to anger, not good at all. I tried venlafaxine but that made the DE worse and did not help much with depression & anxiety. Back on escitalopram and I feel so much better, but still have DE issues. The longer I go without finishing the worse my bladder becomes, causing urgencies and near accidents. I take oxybutynin and "super prostate" vitamins to help, because in the past it was happening daily. Being able to finish relieves the bladder for a few days. I have tried suggestions like you mentioned, but nothing seems to work. Going off antidepressants is not an option and I can't afford a psychologist to see if that would work. I don't know what to do at this point, and it is very frustrating. Anyone in the comments experience this and found something that works? Thank you.

[@user-ci4bh5mx1n]

Some peeps find that delaying a dose or taking a half dose before trying to orgasm may relieve the problem. Most people can do that without risking symptomatic relapse. I myself had retrograde ejaculation with venlafaxine: ejaculation into the bladder, which is a pretty weird experience. Anyway, talk with your prescriber about reducing the dose or changing to a different SSRI. Just because you have that side effect from one SSRI doesn't mean you'll get it from all. Most important thing: Don't give up!

[@waltergreen6981]

Good to know

[@shawncarmack7484]

Are u in Ga I need your help!!!!!!!

[@rockyroll8]

My girl likes when I delay cause when I finally do it's like a fountain. She loves it.

[@PercivalFakeman]

It is not the worst thing. Just keep trying or arrange for another go.

[@horuslupercal2385]

How do I get this condition?????

[@justinjarrett5868]

I wonder if its a prostate issue or something like retrograde ejaculation.

[@smilekaadda2304]

I have already problem of delayed ejaculation it takes me hourse to ejaculate, I have Depression, Trauma and Anxiety I take medication for it but that meds can cause delayed ejaculation its side effects of that meds my problem make it worse,

[@jimmyisherenow]

I got prescribed trazodone and it fixed it right away.

[@memegoddd1059]

Is it permanently cured?

[@memegoddd1059]

Isn’t that an antidepressant I swr it causes delayed ejaculation

[@luvmywetpets]

I usally have the opposite PE, So I I tried KY Delay Spray..That stuff is too much of a delay. IMHO

[@BillandTed-ke4hp]

For me not sure why. I can go sometimes for three four hours never happens. Allot of time it is feel. As in the feel is off for how it happening. I know sometimes I feel like a gun that builds up then can’t fire.

[@obatundedjakuta]

For older guys, remember that many medications can cause Delayed Ejaculation. One that comes to mind is Tamsulosin (Flomax). Especially after prolonged use. If that is the case for you, do not stop cold turkey, the consequences will be painful. Talk to your doctor about the possibility of prescribing an alternative medicine.

[@selkirkswift]

Man that would be a nice problem to have. Currently in the come when you want program and a few weeks in having some notable success

[@CaitlinV]

Thank you for sharing!

[@buckaye03]

In the beginning? Yes! But after 25 yrs? I would like to finish first for a change!

[@Zetler]

Have this for years. Not sure if this problem I want fix because everyone else is having fun.

[@3DJapan]

As for porn. I think it's totally different when you're watching a video by yourself and when you have a real, in-the-flesh person in front of you (or behind you, whatever).

[@alg11297]

Won't prozac delay ejaculation.? It's used for guys with premature ejaculation. So should you lay off the prozak?

[@andrewjones575]

Certainly some medications delay or prevent ejaculation.

[@arygawel7627]

Dear Caitlin, I think most men exactly knows about their problems. What they want to do with this is different story. Bad thing is that almost every women know nothing about men problems and it is sick ! That ignorance everytime ending like "it's ur foult do something!". In my opinion u should go to every women and teach them. We men rly need some understanding.

[@brandonelieff1158]

Meds killed my Labido. But I think it'd coming back?

[@tom61375]

TIZZLE~TIZZLE 🌹😎👍👍 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 & 💎💎💎💎💎 Always Love & Good Vibes From Las Vegas, Nevada. Sincerely, Tom Weidler

[@andrewjones575]

Is this more common in circumcised men?

[@leeeastwood6368]

good question!

[@newedgeassassin1947]

Uncut here and I have DE, Just realized that it's not something I want because I just got into a serious relationship, I'm just happy that she's very understanding and doesn't put pressure on me to fix it, she's very understanding and supportive, tbh as I'm waiting this I no longer see it as a "bad thing" since it shows me how much she cares. but yeah good point, but was thinking it's maybe more of a mental block then physical in most cases?

[@mattskinner846]

I believe so, yes

[@dariamvs]

Could this apply to women as well?

[@Yoros009]

Yes it can, especially with strong sex toy like the "womaniser"

[@ObeytheRussianBlue]

Cabergoline and sublingual Troches of apomorphine work all the time! Dr Rocket T

[@adelalaiwi]

I think treating delayed ejaculation is much easier than treating PE. But I guess, both are caused by mental blockers (mostly). Im 52 and still suffering from PE. When I was young, they used to tell me not to worry as it would be solved after marriage by experience. But no use 😟

[@MetroidHunter30001]

I'd rather have PE instead..

[@Davidwantstodeportaliens]

I’m 26 and dealing with delayed ejaculation. I blame all the porn and masturbation I was doing since I was a teenager. I didn’t have luck with women til recently, so that’s all I did.☹️ the girl I’m with now gets a lot of of pleasure from me since I can do her for a long time and help her reach orgasm easily. I’m hoping a few weeks of no porn and masturbating will fix this.

[@AlexandriaTheSecond]

⁠@@MetroidHunter30001I'd rather have delayed ejaculation instead. Premature ejaculation is suck. You can't please your women with your thing. And that may leads her to cheating on me

[@jmwlife2k]

@@AlexandriaTheSecondI’m probably one of the rare ones who started with PE and switched to delayed. With delayed you can definitely please your woman more and longer, but the downside is they will question your attraction level to you up to and including thinking you’re undercover gay. This can absolutely wreck a relationship. Wrecked one of mine. On the PE side, yes it can be frustrating not being able to go longer with your d, but there are other ways to please your woman. And she’s not going to question your attraction level ever. I’d prefer not to have either issue, but if I had to choose it would be PE because I know how to use my mouth and fingers lol. With delayed you need a very mature and self confident woman to handle it

[@6feet5inflorida36]

Delayed or MUCH BETTER than Premature! What’s the problem here? My GOAL is to have a DELAYED ending. Longer enjoyment is a good thing! Women FAKE IT, ….guess what?

[@johnpuleo3176]

Could it be relationship issues with a woman as you were growing up, like mother or step mother?

[@CarnivoreKirk]

I'm thinking more and more it was using antidepressants for ten years

[@tomwolfe589]

I have an enlarged prostate...I am 60 . I believe that is my problem. I am going to to try and masturbate less..sometimes twice or 3 times a day. always daily.... I wanna see if I can hold off for 3 days... I will see if that helps. thanks for addressing the problem.

[@shailaja422]

Isn't this a blessing in disguise..... Man can thrust for unlimited time ❤️😀

[@JoeJoe-qx4pr]

Nope, the woman can become worn out to the point of no longer enjoying the experience then feel it as a personal defeat that SHE wasn't able to satisfy.

[@Yoros009]

Dude I've done it for 2.5 hours last time, could not climax. Frustrating for me and her.

[@agentorange153]

@@JoeJoe-qx4pr Plus, there's a point where the man has to give up simply from physical fatigue! And what if you're trying for a baby -- how will the woman conceive if the man can't finish into her???

[@TheHalloweenmasks]

I have had this problem for four years now, its got worse since I have been taking pregabalin for hip pain. I am 52, I don't have a girlfriend, I have to make do with hand relief.

[@ihategooglealot3741]

Lots of causers, and they can combine, stress, prior play, lack of attraction, lack of trust, fatigue to list a few

[@route779]

My husband has this issue. He has no problem getting aroused or performing, but it takes him along time to climax. I climax multiple times before he does, and usually by the time he’s ready to climax, it’s physically painful for me at that point and I have to finish him in other ways.

[@TristanMorrow]

Be kind to him -- he probably doesn't enjoy hurting you. I'd recommend getting him warmed up and as close to cumming before putting him in.

[@JoeJoe-qx4pr]

Bless your soul for being understanding and finding alternatives 🙌

[@Davidwantstodeportaliens]

You are a trooper. God bless you

[@6feet5inflorida36]

Delayed or MUCH BETTER than Premature! What’s the problem here? My GOAL is to have a DELAYED ending. Longer enjoyment is a good thing! Women FAKE IT, quess what????

[@drumur]

A common side effect of SSRIs (antidepressants). Wellbutrin has no sexual side effects

[@tisrari5849]

GOD I wish i had this problem

[@mikemackinaw]

Anti depressants can also be part of this problem for some people.

[@BBD40]

DE is a new issue for me. In the past I prefer to finish behind my gf, doggie style. My new gf won't give me that position. She prefers to finish me by hand after I get tired from DE.

[@Ballistichydrant]

Step one. Get your bloodwork done

[@buckaye03]

Very frustrating when you've been hitting it for 45 min. or more! It's cool for a 1 night stand but in a relationship? 🤬🤬

[@gmlgml780]

Yeah. I don't know what that is, but for the first hearing, I would say just enjoy that.

[@carlabruin4677]

Congratulations with your amazing New Show😁 (for people who are interested in the title of the show, it's called "Good Sex")

[@jnbovee]

Watching this on my lunch break and a co worker walks by just as the bikini girl on the bed shows

[@onlyhuman9986]

Antidepressants are mostly to blame for this…..

[@andrewjones575]

How about if I like to last longer than average, but she insists I take too long & that "intercourse shouldn't last longer than five minutes"?

[@leeeastwood6368]

been there. done that. got divorced!

[@tompatchak8706]

Then she needs help

[@Yoros009]

She probably is not enjoying it.

[@andrewjones575]

@@Yoros009 She said she has never enjoyed it when it takes longer than five minutes.

[@Yoros009]

@@andrewjones575 she doesn't know how to climax or she's asexual I don't know. Maybe you're not doing it right and she's not communicating what she likes.

[@ooops8200]

This is very true, I’ve always had this problem. N, I didn’t watch porn. Erection was there without a grand finally. My woman would love it and I would hate it. It ain’t a great thing as you would think, it sucks. A mental block!!!

[@CaitlinV]

Thank you for sharing!

[@jonesmauriceelijah7.222]

TO BE HONEST i don't want to change this issue after the 3rd masturbatory ejaculation it's just autopilot. I gotta say NO to you on this one.......

[@dirtlump]

If you delay it initially ? then in my experience, doing that can somewhat 'desensitize' and then turn into a very long night not always convenient ? or cause soreness for her ? Just say'in..... sometimes best to just go for it the first time, and then if she's still game ? continue into a Dbl Header.

[@nathanclute9790]

Serious question….. my junk is 4.4 girth is this considered thin????yes or no answersplease

[@Rockzilla404]

My girth is 7.5. Is that considered thick?

[@blackmcbain3145]

@@Rockzilla404 both you guys are fine. Mine is 6 in thick and able to tickle the inner bean proper

[@Inkbydaniel]

Thank you again Caitlin. Im afraid my delayed ejaculation is incurable. I have tried everything. I guess the next step is a sex therapist.

[@Inkbydaniel]

Turned out it was the Prozac. Easy fix

[@marshallrowley3516]

I do this all the time more poundtown for me .

[@chrismcpherson1586]

Honestly I don't feel a woman can actually know anything like it's like.

[@leoluna319]

You are absolutely right. It is caused by porn. Porn is the new "cigarette" or alcohol.

[@desmondrclifton]

(DElayed) is gift&curse

[@ericschwind6848]

You completely ignored the fact that delayed orgasm can happen without a partner. Delayed orgasm is a side effect of many antidepressants. I’m disappointed that you failed to address or acknowledge this large group of men that suffer from delayed orgasm.

[@NdilevemveMathoki]

Say tht again without being rude

[@danherrmann8755]

My testosterone has stopped. Doctor trying to see if he can help me.

[@dansanderson4427]

Like she knows right

[@danavest]

Sexless marriage for over ten years and after she moved into another bedroom and I bought a life like sex doll she accused me of cheating on her

[@AlexandriaTheSecond]

So you've been Cheating on her with a sex doll? Lmaoo

[@jackleporter4627]

What if you strok yasel off and get the sensation but without the spunk?

[@byronmartin4511]

Byron hi

[@CaitlinV]

Hi Byron!

[@grizzly6018]

Thank whatever god you worship cos people with PME would kill to obtain that power

[@thecowboy9698]

I have a feeling a lot of it is all the shit chemicals that we are constantly being exposed to on a daily basis - through the air we breath, the water we drink, the foods we consume, to the shampoos and body washes we use these days - all have a part to play on why so many young men are experiencing this problem.

[@giniolamy]

Its psychological

[@kennethmccubbin608]

What are the qualifications to be a sex coach?

[@Ballistichydrant]

Not caused by porn Actual causes The following are individual causes but some men can have more than one Causes: Low testosterone High estradiol High SHGB Low DHT Finesteride Antidepressants Chlamydia not all variants Improper nutrition Alcohol Cigarettes Other drugs There may be other causes and porn with masterbation might make it worse, it’s not the cause

[@agentorange153]

Masturbating too often or too hard ABSOLUTELY CAN be the cause -- scientific studies prove it! And this is actually one of the worst scenarios -- although sensitivity CAN come back eventually, it can take a LONG time to do so!

[@freeRoad249]

I do it 15 times a day :\ its fucking crazy i have to do something or take something.. My woman can taked it and i dont know what to do....

[@prestonmack320]

I just figured it was my age

[@olivertigoni9789]

But you haven't said anything yet,or hint ,you keep on repeating your topic without explaining anything

[@WillieSurvive1]

I began masturbating at age 13, so by the time I lost my virginity to my first girlfriend at age 25, I was extremely conditioned to using my hand and could not ejaculate from intercourse. I couldn’t figure out why at the time. Same thing happened with my second girlfriend when I was 29, even though I hadn’t had sex for 3 years by that time. I wouldn’t have a third sex partner until 5 years later when I was 34, and the same thing happened. My wife would become my 4th sex partner, and I was finally able to ejaculate from intercourse with her back when we were engaged and I was 36. What worked for me was having her on top while I also relaxed my pc muscle. Laying on my back also helped because that’s how I would usually be when masturbating and bringing myself to orgasm beginning at age 13.

[@Bluzian74]

Yeah, similar sitch here bro. There's def. research on pressure on the lower back that is related to better orgasms. When on top, I personally have only ejaculated once in my life via intercourse (and Im 49 !! } . I relate sex to blue balls. The only time I never orgasm is with sex. I can't tell you how many gf's have dumped me over the years for not putting out. A guy just can't win in this world, eh!

[@bradman1961]

"I deserve to have a great sex life" - please, someone tell my wife...

[@conspiratornot2215]

For some of us ED causes a delay, or a NOT AT ALL situation. However I have found if I go down on my wife again I still have great sex and make the love of my life, VERY sexually satisfied. Caitlin, u r awesome.

[@CaitlinV]

Thank you for sharing!

[@robertm7717]

You’re sweet.. is it ok that I have a crush on you..? And I’m jealous your boyfriend is so lucky 🍀

[@BCSchmerker]

+CaitlinV *Thanks for the therapist's professional perspective as well as a relay of the medinfo.* *Side note:* I'm formulating a concept for a neurodivergent romance set around a future General Assembly of the OMS Holiness Church of North America, and I'm scheming up the lead pair as delegates for different congregations, both Students in the Personal Development School (for which I'm typing the Attachment Style as leaning Securely Attachable but no majority Style) who started with PDS Certified Therapists in their several areas. I've planned to portray the Six Stages of Relationship to which Professrix Gibson refers across the duration of the story; Stage 2 starts with a lab-partner agreement, Stage 3 with discussions about primary responsibilities as man and wife (both have close to identical skill sets), Stage 4 with the co-start of General Assembly and a wedding schedule at the GA host, OMS Los Ángeles (CA, USA) Holiness; Stage 5 after GA adjounrnment with the wedding itself (and I plan on making first mating a somatic experience mitigating the delayed ejaculation discussed this vid); and Stage 6 with a Contemporary Christian concert at OMS Los Ángeles Holiness with Avalon and Cimorelli the co-headliners. Haven't decided whether I'll cast myself as a vocalist-drummer at the concert, and/or the Professrix as herself visiting the lead pair at a public park in the 小東京 Little Tōkyō Historic District.

[@Prodibber]

Dude are you ok. Whooosh

[@buddyrojek9417]

Holding off to pleasure women causes it . Better to go when you want, after time the time delay will increase as you get bored with her and her excitement will rise as you last longer

[@jackrosario9990]

If she isn't willing to make you happy find a woman who does.

[@user-ex8lo7jd8v]

Talk to fast, slow down and enjoy your topic