what to do when you don't feel queer enough?

what to do when you don't feel queer enough?

[@Norman_Fucking_Rockwell]

I heard if you say you favorite youtubers name 3 time you get hearted and pinned Dutchy Dutchy Dutchy (hope it works)

[@MsDickerz]

🥰🥰🥰

[@emilyrubalcava2706]

Dutchy Dutchy Dutchy

[@michellelohde8683]

@@MsDickerz thank you i gay woman i telling my mum and tonight .

[@dorianrecord8200]

when your favorite bi-con makes you feel valid as a bisexual 💖💜💙

[@l_a_733]

What’s sad is that I like a boy who’s straight and a girl who’s lesbian so I don’t have a chance at any of them😭

[@joshinaround7901]

I have asked so many women who just happen to lesbians out on an date on accident and its a huge string of bad luck. Its alright though there is a lot of people out there for you!

[@thatonegayicon]

i liked my straight best friend before, knowing i had no chance with her, she's the straightest person I know

[@unicorntomboy9736]

It's happened to me

[@willow_rosie]

well I don't "look" queer enough (I'm bi, but my lesbian friend said she doesn't get bi vibes from me, stereorypical anyway)

[@MsDickerz]

There is no such thing lovely!

[@willow_rosie]

@@MsDickerz thank you,it's very sweet of you❤ (But since I'm a baby bi,maybe yet I don't give bi vibes Idk)

[@cousinfun3059]

Omg 4 days in the life of a bi Day 1: *sees a guy* omg what if I have been lying to myself all of this time and I’m rly just straight and seeking attention. Surely people will do this all the time and what if the atmosphere I’m in has made me think I’m bi even if I’m just normal and I have come out for nothing and how do I tell them it was all a lie. Day 2:*sees a girl* oh wait I’m definitely bi. Day 3:*sees a girl* wait that’s two. Maybe I’m actually gay and bi was just my internalised homophobia but that is biphobic by using bi as a stepping stone bcz my “straight side” is gone I mean two whole days what is wrong W me and how do I tell people. Day 4:*sees a guy* oh wait You get the idea and sry for the rant

[@MsDickerz]

💗💗💗

[@m.k.9572]

Why is this so true😭

[@Racso-oscaR]

@@MsDickerz I have a friend who has a homophobic dad how should I help him

[@sushihonter1708]

IM GOING THROUGH TJE SAME EXACT THING UGH

[@inesbc2001]

Perfect description :D

[@morgyton8890]

I present feminine and as a pangender (maybe, still questioning), I often feel as though maybe I'm faking all of it and I'm actually cishet.

[@MsDickerz]

You are so valid!!

[@morgyton8890]

@@MsDickerz Thanks Dutchy!

[@user-tb8lw7ok9e]

I'm literally the exact same!!!! And it doesn't matter that you present femme or feminine, you are who you are and don't need to prove anything!!!

[@unicorntomboy9736]

Forgive for asking, but what is pangender? I have never heard of it before

[@morgyton8890]

@@unicorntomboy9736 Pangender refers to a person whose gender identity is not limited to one gender and may encompass all genders at once.

[@MsDickerz]

Hi cutie. You ARE queer enough & I love you 🌈😇💗

[@diganta22]

Dutchy Forever 🇺🇸🏳️‍🌈💚

[@MsDickerz]

@@diganta22 💗💗💗

[@willopeda8637]

💕💕💕💕 this makes me feel so valid!!! 🦋🦋💗

[@nynatural7632]

omg thank you for this!! i’ve recently been struggling to call myself bi (even tho i know i like more then boys lol) because i haven’t had any experience with girls yet and this really helped!!! 💗💜💙

[@madison4860]

Same, I often think maybe I’ve just convinced myself I’m queer because I want to badly to be a part of the community. And that is such a scary thought especially when I feel such a strong attachment to it

[@wacawaka1802]

So instead you want to call yourself a word that means weird?

[@MichaelBlaneWalker]

I feel that. My parents gave me queer imposter syndrome and I kept thinking “I am bi, but am I lying to myself?!”

[@JltenGamng]

I am a male and my pronouns are he/him but I will accept any pronouns, like if someone were to call me a big sister I’d be happy about it😅 also I’m still questioning things but I k ow I’m gay myself😁 also hi Dutchy If you see this comment you are one of my favourite youtubers😁

[@MsDickerz]

💗💗💗

[@maddiemcmullen7671]

I came to your channel as a baby closeted lesbian who hid in my room watching your videos at 2 in the morning when my familys asleep now im out and very happy all i wanna say is i wouldnt be here without you thanks :D

[@annie_sourcandy3934]

Thank you so much for making this!!!! I often feel like I might be faking being pansexual and maybe I’m just straight...

[@thelazygamer2195]

I don't think people will ever fully understand just how much Dutchy does for this community. She's the reason I 1) was able to tell I'm Pansexual 2) was able to tell _people_ I pansexual And 3) was able to accept myself for who I really am. People, we should all appreciate people like Dutchy. People who care to educate and help with topics such as these don't come around as often as you would hope.

[@nadia.1177]

Thanks Dutchy, it was very nice to see you 💗

[@diorrichavlogs2491]

Thanks Dutchy! This really helped!!! My notifications are on!

[@abismith7945]

omg i rlly needed this! thank you so much dutchy for making me feel valid as always 🤍

[@josefonseca4155]

When I consider my dating activity- or lack of it - on the last few years I could easily experiment straight impostor syndrome. I suspect I am not alone. Kudos on another to the point excelent video. You are the best.

[@itzbrithd_35]

Thank u I need this, my father didn't believe me when I came out as gay because I haven't had any experience with men yet, this video really helped me to block out those negative thoughts thank u dutchy

[@MouseTableChair]

Hi dutchy, I just wanted to say thankyou for all the videos you do, it really helps me. Im bisexual and i told my best friend. He said he would always support me, but he said i wasnt safe as im bi and he is extremely hateful, then he ghosted me. He told me to take of my lgbtq+ hoodie as its not right. You are amazing dutchy thankyou for all you do ❤️ you are helping through this tough time as we had been friends for a couple of years. ❤️🏳️‍🌈

[@StomachAcid]

I think your channel is so cool and awesome! You give really cool advice and that is amazing. Keep going!

[@MsDickerz]

Aw thanks so much!

[@laurenlittlewood3913]

Thank you for this video. I don’t think it is talk about enough. And thank you for calling out the shade from our own community. If we aren’t loving and accepting of each other how can we expect anyone else to love and accept us outside our community.

[@ROCKONplaceboforever]

Thanks for this dutchy i needed it as a bisexiual woman i feel like this sometimes cause i currently dating a man u are amazing love u xxxxx

[@zoej3689]

can you do a video about gender identity? like how to know if your cis, trans, non - binary (or other things I'm unaware of)?

[@labradoriteeye]

Wow this helps me a lot, I've had kind of an identity crisis recently concerning this and started questioning If i was really bi. I have been mainly with guys and i guess most people just think I'm some sort of attention seeker, so I've started being scared of telling people that I'm bi, also in the lgbtq+ community because I dont feel valid enough. Thank you Dutchy for saying everything I've been feeling these past weeks and years, it comforts me to think I'm not the only one to have these kind of thoughts 💜💜💜

[@unicorntomboy9736]

You are purfectly valid to me

[@BeautyMonster1000]

Kickass video Dutchy!

[@michelledreyer7281]

I really need this. Thank you

[@Doggo_does_stuf]

hi! You don’t know how perfectly timed this was 💛 recently I have been telling myself i axe and look nothin like a lesbian and I’m not valid and I’m faking it, it is hard to control these thoughts and this video helped so much if showing me I’m not the only one feeling this way so thanks lots 💛☀️

[@Doggo_does_stuf]

Then I also think we’ll i also think I’m Pan ahhh

[@MsDickerz]

I’m so glad! You’re so valid!

[@Doggo_does_stuf]

@@MsDickerz thanks I’m figuring it out

[@quinn5130]

I felt this especially as a queer romantic asexual person.

[@hirandompersonscrollingthr1350]

I know that this video came out a long time ago but I just anted to say thanks because I am bi and I have never actually dated someone before and people say I look straight so this video helped me a ton! Your'e awesome! :)

[@elliesdiary14]

ahhh I came out to my parents!!!! they took it really well i'm so happyyyy :))))

[@elliesdiary14]

@@boredboring thank you so much

[@Twinkle_Scythe]

I've experienced this before with me never being in a proper relationship but having crushes on and kissing girls in romantic ways and this video really helped me, thanks Dutchy! Also why was there a person in the live chat spamming the song 'Chug jug with you' ?

[@nehirercan6525]

thank you

[@thedailyshaver1171]

Why doesn't anyone talk about people with a di2ability/di2abled people who are in the LGBTQ+ anyway Dutchy? 🌈🌈🌈 Hope you tube doesn't delete this comment

[@Sasgirl107]

Because it doesn’t matter if you have you have a disability! It’s not what defines you.

[@diganta22]

You're always my favorite 💚

[@Racso-oscaR]

I just came out as pan

[@zoej3689]

:)

[@kaiya33123]

THANK YOU DUTCHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@gabrieltulliani2646]

Honestly, sometimes I feel gay and sometimes I feel bisexual...strange I know😂 im in a relationship with a guy, and couldn't be happy. I'm still struggling with finding out where I stand, but anyways. Love the vids as always dutchy!

[@Piladrillo22]

Unfortunately, I’ve experienced invalidating comments towards myself and my relationship from my own lesbian community. I’m femme presenting in a committed lesbian relationship. (My girlfriend is also very femme presenting). We’ve both found a LOT of toxic masculinity and other invalidating comments from butch lesbians.... we expect that from other people but not our own community.... gotta support each other in a world that already struggles to understand us!!

[@junkoenoshima2756]

Another femme presenting lesbian here star strong you two it will get better one day the community will one day drop the toxic stereotypes

[@Piladrillo22]

@@junkoenoshima2756 thanks for the reply!

[@leylaerrogutierrez1590]

I WANT TO LOOK GAY BUT I AM A CLOSETED BISEXUAL WITH HOMOPHOBIC PARENTS I JUST WANNA BE THE GAYEST WITHOUT PEOPLE I KNOW ACTUALLY REALIZING WTF IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE AM I STUPID

[@ghostofjohnandre9136]

There isn’t really a way to dress gay but you could follow some stereotypes which sometimes look cute. Female bisexuals... well Dutchy has quite a lot of videos about that. For male bisexual stereotypes from what I have seen it is similar but abit more masc (but that’s just a stereotype, plenty of bi women are masc and bi men are fem). If you wanna express yourself through clothing then maybe wear clothing that fits into the bisexuality flag? I’m never gonna remember the way round it goes but blue pink and purple (purples definitely in the middle I can remember that much haha).

[@unicorntomboy9736]

@@ghostofjohnandre9136 I personally don't think that you should have to mould yourself to gay stereotypes to feel valid within the community, and should be able to dress however you want. I personally wish that there was more representation of masculine gay men in media, such as in the movie Brokeback Mountain

[@leylaerrogutierrez1590]

@@ghostofjohnandre9136 Ok, thank you very much! （づ￣3￣）づ╭❤～ (btw, in the flag pink goes always on the top)

[@leylaerrogutierrez1590]

@@unicorntomboy9736 I agree with you, I mean, the stereotypes are just a shitty social construction, but I want to express myself dressing like some people associate with "looking gay" so I can say proudly I am a part of the lgbt+ community. I know there isn't any specific way to look gay, and if you are gay you don't have to dress different, the way you look doesn't define your sexuality. But I think is fun playing with the stereotypes and see who would get it if I dress "gay"

[@unicorntomboy9736]

@@leylaerrogutierrez1590 I understand where you're coming from, and if you want to dress in a certain style that's purfectly valid It's just that once I spoken to an older gay man, who was in his 50s or 60s I think, and said to me (I am paraphrasing here) that all the trappings of gay culture in the 1970s and 80s having to fit into that felt more of s prison than it was to be closeted.

[@vappuluoma2918]

I do feel queer "enough", but what i think my parents would say if i told them would be "you are too young to know yet" and that makes be question myself sometimes. I know what I like tho, thats women;)

[@geoffreyhewitt18]

we love you dutch

[@sophiamartinez649]

As a baby bi who hasnt dated or even kissed anyone, ive kinda accepted it but i still dont feel like part of the conmunity even tho its the second freaking letter. Also, is it just me or as soon as i accepted that i like girls, my attraction to boys went📉📉📉. Sometimes i wonder if im actually a lesbian, but then i remember Oikawa Tooru and all the other fictional characters that ive fallen in love with (but theyre just fictional, maybe i am🤔). Like girls are amazing, i love them, can i just kiss one already but irl boys just make me go 'eh' or 'bleh' even tho i used to be super obssessed with them before Sorry for my confused bisexual rant, as some of y'all may know its confusing af😂

[@junkoenoshima2756]

Well if you don't start being attracted to boys irl that often you might be homoflux which is under the bi umbrella. I describes somebody who is mostly homosexual (being gay/lesbian) who is sometimes straight hope this helps.

[@Ajshdjdodmendn]

Hi Dutchy! I have a question about coming out as Bi to some straight friends. My question is how do I drop hints to a straight person that doesn't know what a bisexual flag looks like? I want to send her a pic of the bisexual flag and say "This is my sexuality"! but I feel like she won't understand. What should I do and how can I make her understand without basically telling her? Thanks!

[@myamarquez5471]

hiii! could you please do a video on how to ask a girl for her out or for her number if you don't know her sexuality?? ps. i love your videos uwu

[@myamarquez5471]

also, YOUR OUTFIT IS SO DOPE!

[@junkoenoshima2756]

Well since its pride month you can ask because that's what a lot of my freind group does during pride month

[@katdoesweirdstuff]

I feel bad cause a few months ago one of my friends came out a bisexual but today she came back out as straight, and she said she kinda felt like she was pressured into identifying as queer as our whole friend group is queer. And I feel really bad for contributing her into feeling pressured to coming out as bisexual. And I feel like I messed up big time, and idk what to do, I've apologized but I still don't feel like that's enough.

[@kaseyford1490]

Late to the party but thankyou for this. As an Aroace I don't feel queer enough sometimes. I can pass as a straight person coz I'm single 😅 I also don't feel that seen or validated by my own family 😢

[@youtubeuser1334]

dutchyyy👑

[@rst6249]

Dutchy, girls and gays, LGBTQ+ community and supporters, I need your advice. My best friend is asking me to be her gf next time we see each other (like in a week) but I'm afraid, I thought I was a lesbian, then just queer and now I don't even know if I'm actually straight and I don't wanna hurt her feelings, I truly love her, but if things don't work out then am I valid as straight? What if it turns out I'm actually straight? Do I need to come out to everyone? I don't know what to do so any advice is appreciated, tysm💜💜

[@unicorntomboy9736]

I would just go and see what happens. Some straight girls experiment in high school & college before settling down with a boyfriend, but they still call themselves straight. Only you yourself know how you feel inside and how you indentify as.

[@CoasterBrain]

I think I might be bi or gay, I’m currently aromantic asexual right now but a bit ago I may have kind of just maybe been attracted to a male and i don’t know anymore

[@brettcarruthers8838]

Have you felt a lot of imposter syndrome as a content creator? If you're looking for ideas, you should do another video reacting to old vids and photos.

[@just_another_killjoy9490]

My dad told me I couldn't say I was bi til I've had "experience" and I better not have any yet... but I can be straight?

[@lee.lee.lee.]

Don't first I thought I was pansexual but then I changed a little bit because I'm got really attracted to a girl and then I started watching lesbian tiktoks and then I started thinking about a girl a lot and then I started not liking men and men I told my mom I was pan and then a few weeks before realize I was lesbian she asked if I was with you and I said no I'm pan okay yeah now I don't know how to come out help me Dutchyy!💕💕

[@charlie-4130]

I hate it when people say I'm not nonbinary because I still use she/her pronuns as before I do coming out and they always says something like "aren't you suppose to go they/them pronouns?" It's a bit annoying to be honest :/

[@tk6882]

Hi Dutchy, I have realized that I am not straight, but idk if I’m gay or bi (it’s not anything else) could u help me a little bit

[@junkoenoshima2756]

Well the best way is through time and looking at different people online (this method took me about a week but don't worry if it takes you longer)

[@tk6882]

@@junkoenoshima2756 thanks it’s just so hard sometimes

[@laurenxurarakacosplays859]

i constantly get reminded bc my parents have always, yes since i was a small child, called me nicknames such as "fruit face" or "fruit cake" etc, which in my mind leads to *fruityyy* and now im half out as bi lmaoo 💕

[@junkoenoshima2756]

What do you mean by half out?

[@TipCOOT]

Hey

[@MsDickerz]

Hiiii!

[@ardisblair232]

I am like 95% sure I'm gay and I want to come out to my family what should I do???

[@idc1427]

MY BESTIE IS PAN AND I JUST FEEL SOMTHING IDK WHAT BUT LIKE SHE WILL GIVE ME HER HOODIE/JACKET SHE WILL LET ME DRINK HER WATER IDK AND SOME GUY GAVE ME A PRES AND SHE GOT SO UPSET... i feel somthing i just don’t know what it is

[@junkoenoshima2756]

Hope you figure out how you feel about her good luck

[@patriciamactavish3864]

Early

[@MsDickerz]

Woooo!

[@estherlise]

I had the problem of not felling qeer enough when I first started felling qeer. I started felling qeer and question my sexuality, when I falled in love with a girl. But then a around half year later the person swicth gender, and is now a trans male. When he swicth I started question my sexuality, and thought like oh I wasn't acrated to a girl I was just acrated to a boy who wasn't come out yet. Today I'm pansexual and fell qeer.

[@mikl561]

I'm pretty sure I'm a lesbian but I've never dated or been with a girl and now I'm worried that I'm just kidding myself...

[@samanthastoker8443]

I have a crush on a female and am still questioning and am only 12 but my mom said it is a trend but I know I have the feeling for this girl and know that I am some present in to girls but my mom says I am wrong but at the same time I don’t think there is any problem with the lgbtq but I feel like I am wrong for being lgbtq but I don’t have a problem with any one else and I am confused and worried

[@primodernious]

this is what i call a talking cartoon that think she is a human. she is very similar to these crazy role playing games depicting medieval people from the streets.

[@imthatextrakid8292]

Does bathing myself in rainbow work?

[@flowerfennecfox]

I have attraction too women, men and multiple other genders too. Non gender people. I lean more towards men though, more men seem too want to date me. Queer women or women at all don’t give me a chance I was in a short flirty relationship with a woman online. I’m currently in a long distance relationship with a guy. I’ve dated more guys than girls. It wasn’t because I wouldn’t kiss or have sex with girls, I just was never given the opportunity. I don’t want too have sex with guys (I’m nervous about that kind of stuff) Am I valid I’m confused on my identify. People all my life have assumed I’m straight. Does getting crushes on women growing up make you not straight or certain desires but being ashamed of it and hiding it. I rejected dating a friend I wasn’t out of the closet yet.

[@weekendwankere69]

Oh yes.

[@cosmicsocks_]

Would someone explain to me the difference between bisexual and pansexual please? 🏳️‍🌈

[@joshinaround7901]

Pansexual includes attraction to non binary and trans folk along with attraction to male and females. Its very similair to bisexuality which is just attraction to male and females

[@unicorntomboy9736]

@@joshinaround7901 But that implies that the term bisexual is transphobic in some way, which is something I completely disagree with

[@nikofortuna1401]

If we get very into it Bi (basically meaning two in latin) generally refers to being attracted to two genders, Poly would be multiple and Omni all. Pansexual/romantic/etc. means someone is attracted to others regardless of gender.

[@cosmicsocks_]

@@nikofortuna1401 ty

[@joshinaround7901]

@@unicorntomboy9736 no its not transphobic I would say. Kinda like having a preference.

[@ariellamaes3611]

How do I show pride from in the closet.... 🏳️‍🌈

[@junkoenoshima2756]

If you have coloured pencils arrange them in the colour of your pride flag in your room (I do this myself) but try not to make it obvious (for example I have quite a complicated pride flag so I just used the simple rainbow one representing gay and the whole community)

[@emilyrubalcava2706]

Uh Dutchy Dutchy Dutchy

[@K.4fka]

Life of a bi Maybe lesbian Or straight Day 1: i have a girlfriend now i love her i would never like a guy Day 2:*sees cute guy* wait... what? Day 3: mom i like boys and girls "(mom) i dated a girl before your dad it's nothing special, we even did IT" Day 4: mom i like girls "(mom) but you're looking at guys on the street" yea but- idkkkkk Day 5:*buys gay flag* "(mom) not even gonna ask"

[@kyleesorrell2697]

They should make a bisexual flag emoji!

[@Ray-oc2pk]

hey

[@MsDickerz]

Hello!

[@cathalreilly6579]

What you are talking about is people that is calling people names and that's the way people is thinking that if people didn't say that people think that

[@vidhead85]

Yes, because I don't fawn over Beyonce

[@AleesatheIsraeli]

Dutchy update your Patreon.

[@strawbbcakey8847]

When I don’t feel bi enough I think of attractive couples,,, I mean bi panikk!?

[@cathalreilly6579]

Does a gorgeous phone cover guy after sending me a picture of himself off Facebook and he's just gorgeous👬👭🌈🌈🌈👅💓💕💞💖🌼🌸💟💘💝💗💜💛💗💝💘💟💓💕💞👅👅👅👅🌈🌈🌈🌈🌼💝💖💘💕💟🌸💓👅👅👅💗💖💞💕💓💟💘💕💞💝💗💞