When Your Child is Your Hero | The Fatherhood Project

This week we talk with Matt Oakes. His son Liam was recently diagnosed with Autism and Verbal Apraxia, which prevents him from talking. Matt talks about what it means to be a good dad and how we need to humble ourselves as dads.
Filmmaker Corbyn Tyson explores what it means to be a good dad. This is a series that looks at what it means to be a father today.
Written and produced by Corbyn Tyson
www.corbyntyson.net
twitter: @corbyntyson
Crew:
Matt Youngblood
Jared Cacciatore
Special Thanks:
SVL Productions
Matt & Courtney Oakes
Brave Hearts at the Bergmann Centre
www.braveheartsriding.org
Music: Josh Garrels
www.marmosetmusic.com
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[@HellVedaKa]

"Im scared..." and yet brave enough to face those fears.

[@jahredgallo]

I can't even imagine. My son is my life. I wish you and your family all the happiness in the world. As a father I just want to be able to provide and protect my son he is everything to me.

[@cardinalskate]

Wonderful story. I personally know two different children, one boy (3.5 y/o) and one girl (4 y/o), who have Apraxia. Both have come so far and are beginning to talk so well. It's so amazing to watch them be able to finally communicate.

[@Didz53]

Finally something that focuses on fatherhood and its importance!!!

[@alwaysandeverful]

So great to see such a positive story about disability on here! Liam seems like such a strong, wonderful boy, and it's so great to see him using his AAC device too! These computers really change peoples lives. Thanks for another thought provoking video, this channel never fails!

[@debbieomi]

My now 17 year old son was diagnosed with autism near his third birthday and only began talking with schooling and intensive therapy about 8 months in. It is not easy to raise and nurture a child with autism even the kiddos who are high functioning. I just made up my mind that I would never stop learning, always be my son's advocate, and love him just as any other parent would do. I know states and even communities are different and I know I am blessed to have our intermediate school system be the root of support for our autistic kids in our region. Take all the support you can from all sources, attend support meetings (even if only viable to do so through internet forums), and always do your best. It will not be the world you once envisioned for yourself and family but so what? You just create a new one- filled with support and love.

[@timothylindgren5832]

These always inspire me to be better with my twins. As a paraplegic sometimes I am insecure about my abilities. All I want is to be the best dad I can be. Thanks for the inspiration

[@Jackiethepeapod]

This is crazy, our son Liam was also diagnosed with autism and verbal apraxia at the age of 7. The only reason we saw this was because Liam searched his name into youtube and started watching it. Both our boys are on the spectrum, our old son Logan aged 13 is autistic, add and tourettes. The difference between my boys was Logan was speech delayed but he caught up in kindergarten, where as Liam fights every day to get his words understood. We still have huge problems with sensory integration disorder and rumination disorder. Liam just recently started having seizures. Liam is active in soccer and cub scouts though. Both my boys are stronger than any adult I have ever met. Thank you for telling our story through your family!

[@dawnkrueger4153]

Matt Oakes,

[@jcyoungquist]

The most important message in this video for me is the line "No, we don't just do things. That's not how this family operates."

[@ashactingup3330]

This is so lovely to watch. My dad did not want to be a father when he was younger, but as soon as they put me and my brother in his arms he was a natural. He taught me to ride a bike, fish, do DIY and that I could be anyone I wanted to be. So proud to have such a strong male influence in my life, watching him fight to be a good person in a world where that's not always easy is such an inspiration and he still gives the best dad-hugs ever. Will keep watching these! Keep up the great work!

[@meganite4]

It is situations like this that make me wonder if Liam would benefit from learning sign language as a form of communication. It just makes me really happy that there is technology and equine therapy that can help children that 50 years ago would have suffered through their entire life.

[@Malcontent76]

Hey guys, I have to tell you that this video moved me to tears and I'm still crying as I type this. When our son's pediatrician noticed that our son Dane wasn't hitting certain milestones in his communication he suggested we have him evaluated by our Regional Center. It was at 18 months of age that our son Dane was diagnosed with autism. It was one of the hardest things his mother and I have ever had to hear. On the one hand, we finally knew what it was, but on the other hand, we didn't fully understand what it meant in the long term. The countless hours of therapy, the meltdowns, the aversion to eating a variety of foods and the lack of ability to communicate and socialize. I see so much of my family in Matt, his wife and Liam. I've spent hours with him during his in-home therapy and working with him on his communication. Dane's mother is unbelievably resilient, resourceful and the reason why he has been able to get the help he needs. I think that is what made it so moving. I love my son so much that the thought of him being unable to communicate with anyone or that someone might take advantage of him because of his difficulty verbalizing terrifies me. But I also hold on to hope. He has made such huge strides in his development thanks to early intervention, finding the right schools for him and being involved with his therapy. He surprises us everyday with the new words and phrases he picks up and the new foods he's willing to try. He has taught us all so much about ourselves, how to communicate and how to see the world through someone else's eyes. He has taught us patience and shown us how to take joy in the little moments and how to find him through all of the noise.

[@KunoichiN3rd]

My oldest sister is on the Autism Spectrum--more specifically with the diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome--and though she doesn't have Verbal Apraxia, I have seen how my parents can relate to the issues of Matt and his wife. Though I was not around when my sister was at her youngest, my parents say it was hardest when she was young. There's more emotional distress, less ability to communicate, more things to overcome, etc. But she has overcome. She is now 33, having just completed her PhD, and his now teaching at a university in Alabama. She lives on her own, loves it, and is doing great. I know it is difficult for the Oakeses, but they should never lose hope or give up. :)

[@CurtisPhelan]

Such a loving and understanding family. Liam is a Super Hero!

[@Magradon]

Liam seems like a sweet, intelligent kid with an amazing family supporting him. I hope to see more of him on SoulPancake. I will never know what it's like to be a Father, but I applaud these men...they're doing a great job.

[@shenelleb]

What a beautiful family. May god bless them

[@markhenry7745]

I’m a single father in the military with a son diagnosed with autism, I understand more than anything how Matt feels when it comes to not knowing what will happen with your son when you pass away. I commend him for making this video and expressing your feelings.. i know it had to be incredibly difficult. Thank you for sharing your story.

[@tagnizkur]

My Wife and I have two boys on the spectrum. When I first heard (all thou we suspected) the word Autism 12 years ago I thought my life was going to come to an end. Back then all you read was "Institution" "Chemical Control" "Drugs" none of it sounded good. I remember the drive home was so silent filled only with our tears. The next day though we brushed it off, got up and said.. "OK he has Autism, now lets make a life for him. So it began, so much trial, so much error, so much joy. Yes we ran into walls, however we stepped back and figured out a way around that wall or over it. Years later he found his voice and that was a blessing. Years later his brother was born and within the first year my wife and I both knew he was going to have Autism but on a whole different level. 8 months later it was confirmed. Sadly he is severely autistic and non verbal. He brings to us challenges daily, well I would dare say he brings a challenge a minute on some days. My wife is the strong one here because she is a stay at home mom and works with him the most. Its not east by any stretch, I could also say yes it is stressful and draining. Yet, when my son gives you a hug, a smile, or a kiss it just seems like none of the other stuff matters. Do I hope for a cure, of course... Do I fear for the future.. every second of my life.

[@artsiemama]

so precious. super dad, super kidds, super family ♡