Why Are African American Woman Infatuated with Nigerian Men That Don’t Select Them As Wives!? 🔥

We addressed all the questions most women dating in any metropolitan city that comes across African men… specifically Nigerian Men! Why are African American women so infatuated with Nigerian men, yet they’re often NOT being selected as life partners/ WIVES!!!
TUNE IN!!!!! Cocktailswithcarly.com
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Special thanks to the @nosh_entertainment for joining us to have these discussions.
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[@denatora7142]

I am a Nigerian and I disagree that African American don't have a culture. You have. You have made something beautiful out of a chaotic situation and hands you were dealt with to create something unique for you. Of course there is bad and good in every culture but that is what makes it. Out of chaos you developed your style of dressing, slangs, music (hello) ' food and lots more. So yeah, I disagree that you don't have a culture. You do!. Am glad y'all made something beautiful out of a terrible situation good or bad, you created it and am proud of y'all.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

I appreciate your comment. We have a entertainment culture that has been created just not something everyone can relate to. That’s the struggle for me. I am thankful to be an American woman…

[@denatora7142]

​@@letstalkovercocktails 😊. Thanks for the reply. Just to add 'Akata' while literally means wild cat/panther. Contexually, it means 'acting brand new' like 'pretending to forget where you from b/c you been in the wild'. Nigerians in diaspora are sometimes called that. So a nigerian pretending not to speak his own language infront of others just to act cool, or pretending not to eat african foods or wear african attires etc may sometimes be called akata. So they will say 'she's acting like an akata'. Mostly it used when a form of pretence is sensed. Basically pretending to not know where you from to act cool but I think b/c most nigerians think black Americans are Africans & think we experience the same struggles, they then associate certain behavior as pretends not knowing history behind it. So if they see a black American use spoon to eat fufu for example, they say that person is an akata but its out of ignorance thinking every black persons know you use hands for that type of food. My thoughts all over the place but I hope my explanation helps. Bottomline is for akata to be used, the person must percieve a sense of pretence perhaps due to ignorance. Also anybody can be called that and its mostly not in a bad way but I won't say some don't use it in a bad way either. Its a word that can go either/or.

[@mikolowiskamikolowiska4993]

@@letstalkovercocktails everyone relates to hip-hop culture, just as you can't relate to a man marrying multiple wives

[@gerardonochie3408]

@@mikolowiskamikolowiska4993 That is not true. Everyone does not relate to hip-hip. Entertainment culture is a shallow thing. The Japanese don't go about saying everyone loves manga and use it as the epitome of Japanese culture. African-Americans have no culture in the actual sense of what culture means. It is not totally their fault based on slavery and many other factors.

[@blackseed9293]

​@@gerardonochie3408This would be false. Our culture was easily seen and experienced until about 1980. Family, Church, marriage, food, music, sense of belonging and a future. What destroyed Black American culture was the importation of Crack Cocaine which obliterated Black families and Black ppl for almost 20 consecutive years. Along with removing good jobs from cities and putting millions of Black males in prisons and making sure they learned no trades for their 20 to 50 year sentences. Some of my friends got 360 years in prison. This is the part left out of these conversations.

[@Blowkala]

I’m a Nigerian man married to African American lady, in my own opinion I think everyone has culture and I think it’s important that we should learn each other culture, one thing I can guarantee you is that we Nigerian learn other peoples cultures and we take ours with wherever we go.

[@bukumiBrown]

Good Evening sir. may i ask how long you and your wife have been married?

[@GentleBreeze-ib9dz]

Y’all be the main ones on that bs!

[@sonyabush9513]

African Americans do have a culture, we created our own style, we set trends, our music, our churches our neighborhoods, our dances, how we respect our elders. Our integrity, we take care of our families.

[@ms.fortune2957]

YESSSSS, VERY WELL SAID! I haven't listen to this yet and can already tell it's offensive. smh WE also contributed to the civil rights movement CHANGING LAWS so that other Cultures have opportunity to reside here in AMERICA! I'll WATCH before explaining what the real deep rooted issue is.

[@FactsOnlyPlease.]

For a very long time we (African Americans) carried the heavy load of keeping people of African descent relevant in the eyes of the world. I don’t say that as a negative. I am enjoying the renaissance that appears to be occurring on the continent-AND THANK GOD!

[@H2O1167]

No, my friend. It means you dont know what culture is. African, Chinese, Indians, European all have culture. When we say African-American dont have culture, its not an insult, it is the fact and its not their fault. They have passed through alot. Church is not your culture. Start by naming your children African names and learning African dishes and go from there.

[@gedenironald8635]

When other people talk about culture they normally don't refer to most of the things you said, African Americans don't have a culture the same way White Americans don't have a culture. British or English people will tell you the same about White Americans, what's worse, is that White Americans who didn't have a culture created a cultureless Black American community that became worse than the white man who didn't have a culture. The culture in Black America is created by white masters, they determine for you when your culture must change, how to present your music and select who must present that culture. Africans, Arabs, Asians have a clearly defined culture, when we get married, when we burry our dead, when a child is born, traditional dances, traditional songs etc, etc... and those are things Black and White Americans don't have and that is the culture we are talking about.

[@ronj7658]

African American culture is a sub devision of white American culture.

[@BlkDll]

As an African-American I find it to be very distasteful and ignorant for the host to say we don’t have culture. The world copies US in culture, behavior, swag, food, dance and music 🎼 etc,. She needs to take history lessons of African American 🇺🇸 ADOS/FBA we a resilient, intelligent, talented and the best that was brought from Africa to America 🇺🇸 We are worldwide Blessings to ADOS.

[@VL60757]

I agree!!!

[@Cahluvca]

💯

[@coreywhite4603]

She also doesn’t understand that he sees black American women as whores as something to be played with.. much like any other none black group of men. You see how shocked she was when he said the sex is good but explained why they chose thr women and she was like really.. over good sex. SMH she literally has all the respect in tha world for them and they literally have zero respect for us. She is deserving to be played with by them maybe it will serve to wake her up to how they see her. He’s telling her very nicely that you are trash compared to our women. Oh yeah you know thy love that white woman as well. The nicer she talks to him the nicer he explains to her that she is the bottom of the barrel & she never picks up on it.

[@mohakweh]

You sure about that??

[@letstalkovercocktails]

What is an African American tradition that’s been carried on for generations? Please don’t use entertainment as an example. What is our flag? What is our language? Slang? Please educate me…

[@SuperKwame1]

I am from Ghana, and my wife is African American , we have been married for 30years, my first wife was African American, lasted 5years. People are People, if you marry an educated black or white it will work if the woman and the man are cultured, the relationship will work. Also, African parents depend on their kids, and so when the women wants to spend every money they make, and the man want to send money home, the marriage will not work.

[@user-li7gv2hv7k]

Had no idea. So how do you make a way for yourself and husband and child if the money is sent away to parents. How does it work?

[@jacintaeke4251]

@@user-li7gv2hv7kit’s one of the culture I do not like. And everyone at the receiving end has entitlement mentality. It’s had to get out under it

[@oluwatobiadegoke13]

@@user-li7gv2hv7k Relax! He won't send everything home. We're just too family oriented. 😁

[@oluwatobiadegoke13]

@@jacintaeke4251 Wtf! It's not like they're putting a gun in your head to send money back home. You only do it if you want to.

[@mahoganysoul7195]

Exactly, people are people ....

[@ladylovve6059]

What if African American say all Nigerian are scammer they want like that so don’t say African American are animal that’s a insult to us real talk

[@urbanq5377]

i get nigerian scammers in my inbox all the time. i have the proof. People aren't just saying nigerian men are scammers to hate them. They really are. And they cant stand the truth. They will call you names for calling their scamming out. Smh. i got called all kinds of names for calling them out on it.

[@nyaintunyaintu509]

They wouldn’t care!

[@irenegaruba48]

Calm down!

[@kingdeechannel6655]

Generalization is bad but how ever, there are too many black american women who built a KZbin/Facebook page on stereotyping African men as needy and they should make sure he is rich before they consider dating them. Even with that, the are still concerned of the African guy leaving after getting greencard. My conclusion is, I think American men blend better with African women but the vice versa is more problematic because Black American women greencard are their defense line for their bad character. The good ones work, but most of them are bad. Stay away from them. Even the black american men don't really like them because of their character. Red flag to identify; tattoos, piercing extremely cosmetic, single parent, unmarried after 30....watch out for these. Not all are bad but most

[@It.is.I-tx6ri]

And they are

[@2ABECKLES]

I'm Black American and I love that I am ❗️👌🏾

[@asiyahad-deenislam5289]

Yes indeed

[@makkedahwells93]

Lies lies lies!!! My husband is Igbo straight from the motherland and I am African American! We are not the only one. 😑😑😑😑

[@voguehaven5154]

just cause you married an igbo man, doesn't make it untrue.

[@seanpeterson7502]

@@voguehaven5154 haha

[@parishers6351]

Lol, right.

[@zainyo516]

You choose the wrong one or you probably just not good for him but Igbo different

[@femimathew105]

Igbo and yoruba are opposite in almost everything

[@nieshelle1]

I like how this conversation seemed to showcase the flaws of African Americans but not those of Nigerians. The viewpoint of using black people for as sex toys because the are "free" is disturbing. As being your true self is deplorable. So we not going to mention the many of Nigerians married man that cheat constantly and are controlling to their wife 🙄

[@TravisAtom]

I think that was mentioned around the 52:45 mark. Maybe a few seconds after.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

We were showcasing the question at hand… Why Nigerians don’t marry African American… yet want to date them and vice versa. Americans do a fine job at showcasing how they act to the entire world! Which often days… is a lil desirable.

[@sundayodabe8150]

If you feel that way, maybe it’s better to make a choice of marrying a non Nigerian, before you make a non issue, an issue for Nigerians. Nigerians have their own cultures, and will not be controlled by the useless non cultures of the west. So Marry any man from the west so that you can control him and force him to remain with you, irrespective of how you treat him.

[@jaybae7315]

In addition to marry for a green card when they have a wife and family back home

[@simp1eone]

Yes everyone has flaws that's why I say you AA women leave our Nigerian or all african men the fck alone and marry your African American men

[@Stratocaster01]

African Americans have a culture and us Nigerians and the rest of the world have been influenced by African Americans.

[@ms.fortune2957]

VERY WELL SAID!!!

[@bibibello2181]

Then you need to be schooled on the definition of culture. I am Nigerian and this erroneous statement is laughable

[@voguehaven5154]

which nigerians are you talking about?? Nigerians are not influenced by black americans...akata. We strive to achieve, while black americans strive to be criminals and then blame the police after they are caught doing crimes.

[@kellesbestbeaches]

@@bibibello2181 the customs, art, social institutions make up cultures. What are you talking about? Don't be ignorant Jazz, Rap, Soul Food Historical Black Colleges, thousands of inventions. Please read more ....

[@Stratocaster01]

@@bibibello2181 you should first school yourself and wean off the ignorance. Culture emanates from a source and becomes that from persistent practice. Culture is established human expression and it is rather rude to suggest that a group of people easily identifiable have no established human expression. For your information, culture can be carried over from another culture as you have African Americans carrying on the the process of “jumping the broom” as a ceremonial rite in weddings. African American music expressions have influenced music all over the world with salient examples all over Africa, S Korea, Japan and the U.K. If you have ever heard of “the Talk”, it is part of African American culture to educate their young ones on police brutality and racism.

[@kathyw.3146]

Foundational Black Americans built the United States of America! We've been here since 1619, and some say even before then. We have our own culture, which we are very proud of. And while it's one of the youngest cultures in the world, it's also one of the most copied and influential cultures in the world. We set the trends! Our medical discoveries and our many inventions are used all over the world every day. Our music, our athletic abilities, and our art and activism are second to none. And we don't run from country to country looking for refuge. We stay and FIGHT! And we will continue to fight any and every injustice that's thrown against us! While I would never disparage anyone's else's culture, I LOVE AND I'M GREATFUL TO GOD FOR MINE.❤

[@TruthSerum101]

Many of them are so engaged in tribalism that they can't even name 10 other African countries. At only 13% of the U.S. population and having endured centuries of enslavement, we have managed to surpass the entire diaspora. We set the template for the advancement for civil rights and dozens of other undeniable lanes that are uniquely Black American. It's such a silly topic.

[@mariposamarshall9773]

So so we'll said- yes WE are imitated and copied all over the world& yes we stay and fight and will continue to do so and BTW WE don' t have to leave home to find employment!!!¡

[@voguehaven5154]

lol...medical advances? you know damn well that is not part of the black american culture. Tattoos, sagging pants, getting angry and trying to fight people, shooting up the place, and not academically ambitious. That is the culture black americans are known for. Also, constantly complaining about white people and how they are holding you back.... Nigerians tend to stay away from all that.

[@kellesbestbeaches]

Yes!!!

[@blacksantaria3642]

IS THIS WOMAN OUT OF HER MIND TO SAY WE HAVE NO CULTURE. THANKS FOR THE HER KNOW OF OUR RICH CULTURE .

[@miacrawfordmc]

For her to sit there and state that African Americans have no cultural! Complete ignorance.

[@ashburnconnecttv7860]

#Fact! She needs to get a college refund. @letstalkovercocktails

[@theblessedblackwoman]

She was very wrong for that! I know she likes Africans but she didn't have to dis her own people.

[@victorylapp]

BABY CALM DOWN!!! 🇳🇬🇳🇬🇳🇬🇳🇬

[@bahacho9205]

If African Americans have a culture, what is your family system? What are your names? What is your food? What is your language?

[@franman576]

That woman host was a terrible representation of black americans. Pandering to nigerians as though Nigerians have it together whereas that country is a mess and talking down to AAs as if AAs haven't created ridiculously great culture of music, inventions etc. You name it and AAs have outclassed any other black groups in the world. I feel second hand embarassment for AAs.

[@MickiRonnae1]

You may not like or respect our culture but we do have one and it’s well documented. Please stop dismissing our accomplishments and history as a group. It is very disrespectful to our ancestors.

[@blackseed9293]

I don't believe anyone is attacking our past culture. Mao Tse Tong said we were the most amazing and resilient people he had ever met. If he came today, would he or even you think the same thing? Not 60 years ago Black culture when we had the highest marriage rate and church was full, today's Black American culture?

[@MickiRonnae1]

@@blackseed9293 All that is fine and worth looking into. I just don’t like this propaganda going around saying we don’t have a culture. That’s a crazy statement to make when our culture literally influences the world and we are only 13% of the population in the USA. I’m in the Cali and there are barely any black people here but all I see is our culture. The way we dress, dance, our music and how we talk. Notice how we demanded reparations now other black countries are starting to demand reparations. We really have more power than we realize and my last point: How can we improve our culture if won’t even recognize it exists? 🫠

[@blackseed9293]

@@MickiRonnae1 Cultures do rise and fall. This is definitely now a culture that has the worst characteristics. The culture is mostly controlled by Entertainment companies who are run by the people you can't mention. Our past culture was mostly positive but not now. If what you mean by culture is the music, the twerking, sagging, cursing constantly then that's not beneficial and will lead to a self inflicted genocide with the assistance and direction of the people that can't be mentioned and other WS people.

[@MickiRonnae1]

@@blackseed9293 Indeed. I think things may turn around. Since toxic rap culture is no longer profitable the labels are shifting their attention elsewhere. This is the perfect opportunity for us to take back our image and we won’t have to compete with billion dollar companies who have been force feeding us garbage. We can take advantage of the internet and technology to promote the more positive sides of our culture and showcase the people who don’t fit into the mainstream narrative of what it means to be a black American.

[@WapajeaWalksOnWater]

​@@MickiRonnae1 I can't even watch Nigerian movies anymore, because all the Nigerian women, are bleaching their skin, and sounding, and acting like us. I've been to Nigeria, you can't gaslight me, I know how much they admire us. You are exactly correct, everybody in modern society imitates us, and then they want to talk trash about us. Boy Bye

[@travisgeorganna]

As an African American woman who often travels back and forth to Nigeria, this is utter nonsense! I urge the host to travel and make her way throughout Nigeria then come back to the table for discussion. Not only we as AA have culture but you will see the root of our culture comes out of the motherland and we are 1 of the same. Let’s educate ourselves around the board, this is why the “certain groups” who want us divided keep us divided with grandiloquent language like this 👀

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Love to hear you travel abroad. During this conversation we never spoke 💯 absolute. We spoke about our experiences and perceptions of even those near and far )that we were able to validate). I absolutely love history and know exactly where my deepest ancestry began as I have roots that originate in Benin City. I’m apart am the solution of understanding and changing the narrative. I want nothing more than our community to win!!! You’re right… we have to work on preventing division. This subject was a highly recommended show topic. Thanks for watching!

[@jacklyneverage3881]

You are right. What she said was disgusting!

[@franman576]

@@jacklyneverage3881 I'm not even AA and i was embarassed by some of the things that came out of that hosts mouth. She needs to travel to Nigeria and she needs to read books on what the AA culture has produced in America. Again I'm not even AA and I'm more proud of her culture than she is.

[@GentleBreeze-ib9dz]

What comes out of Africa that’s part of our culture?

[@richpalmer8325]

Pangea is where my root started on planet earth.

[@done5060]

My mother is Alabama born, DC raised… she met my dad precisely 62 years ago.. 6 years after marriage, she compelled my dad to move the family back to Nigeria… I still don’t understand *WHY* … now I’m in my 40’s, I’m glad she did

[@uchennaegbuna7208]

Ditto a real brother from the motherland

[@ProsperousJanetta]

Awe ❤my husband and I have been married for almost 19 years next month. He is from Ondo State and I am from GA. We have two sons and purchased land in Nigeria in 2012 and finally finished building this year.

[@Tiktok_Reddit]

@@ProsperousJanettacongratulations, when is the house warming… I’m in a university in Ondo state

[@chinneynz7861]

Awesome!

[@ProsperousJanetta]

@@Tiktok_Reddit ayyyeeee how you dey 😂 it's in Abuja see you there ohhhhh

[@advice4u409]

As an AA woman, I don't know any women infatuated with Nigerian or African men. This sounds more personal than collective. I used to get approached by Nigerian men a lot and dated two of them. They were not my cup of tea but very smart and hard-working.

[@jessikatrotter848]

Facts. 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@joshuaemmanuel949]

Lol not ur cup of tea but u dated two ok

[@demolaayorinde3599]

Haha.

[@Blkh-e2s]

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽. Here’s the issue I have with Black American women “dating” Nigerian men or African men from other countries…. #1 - My Black American women “date”, these men while their women for the most part stick with their own Nigerian or African men and don’t even “date” out of their nationality, tribe or ethnicity as much as Black American women do.. #2- The word date has so many different meanings and connotations …Sometimes dating means sexual intimacy and sometimes it doesn’t…. Please don’t misunderstand me, I simply don’t want or appreciate Nigerian men and other African men denigrating Black American women and seeing them as easy sexual conquests!!!!!

[@sherwood9917]

I live in America, and it's news to me that African American women are "infatuated" with Nigerian men or even care to be chosen by said men. I mean, really?!?!

[@bdouglas9723]

Cause it's not true.

[@htownqueen663]

The depiction of Nigerian men on Housewives shows have out this on the map. A lot of AA women want to date successful Nigerian men.

[@sherwood9917]

@@htownqueen663 What does "have out this on the map" mean? Nonetheless, I would urge you not to use reality tv as a barometer of the desires of AA women.

[@introspectator2100]

I didn't even know that there were any Nigerians in the country until I read about it on the Internet a couple of years ago! Real talk!

[@htownqueen663]

@sherwood9917 unfortunately MANY AA women watch these shows and idolize the women and their lifestyles on these shows, so my point is very valid.

[@uchennanwosu4625]

Today, I am a born-again Christian. I am a widower, and I don't date. In my dating days, I was fearful of Black American women. This is because I am Igbo. Our culture is very conservative. It is very ordered and somewhat predictable. As much as I have always interacted with fairly polished and educated Black American women, I always had this fear of surprises. I was concerned about the upbringing. I have somewhat changed. I think social media is opening me up. I just recently viewed content from a young Black American woman. I found her so impressive as a person that if I were twenty years younger, I would be laying out my strategy to win her. In fact, I am praying she finds that very special man. She is seeking a relationship with a Nigerian man, and I hope she finds the right one.

[@msk7458]

That is so kind of you to look out for the younger generation

[@ProsperousJanetta]

I like how you started your comment by saying you are a born again Christian. When my husband and I first got married I would introduce him as a Nigerian and he would correct me and say I'm a Christian first who is Nigerian. I never looked for a Nigerian man I prayed for a Christian man. God has blessed us to married for going on 19 years, two handsome and intelligent sons, and we started businesses and a ministry together. God is good and when you trust Him He will over rule traditions of men. ❤

[@uchennanwosu4625]

@ProsperousJanetta Praise the Lord!!!!!!! Very vital point. Your identity and mine are rooted in Jesus Christ. My race, ethnicity, and family are important to the extent that they were determined by the Lord. However, I distill all truth by the Word of God. I understand God's Word by the Holy Spirit. We are the sons and daughters of Abraham by faith. In Paul's words, which I totally receive, we are the Israel of God.

[@ProsperousJanetta]

@@uchennanwosu4625 amennnn ohhhh 🙏🏾

[@stevenwilliams3015]

Have you all asked yourselves where Christianity was rooted from? How it was pass unto your ancestors? Whether it was passed by force? The intention behind spreading Christianity to us? And was it the same people that enslaved , colonized us and still neo colonizing today? Are they the same people that erased our history? Painted our tradition as evil while their Christianity is the best? As blacks, we should learn to ask ourselves these questions in order for you to dig deeper. This people are so focused on us and how to keep us down forever until will rise against them, they are fighting us mentally, physically, spiritually and in any means necessary and we still don't want to learn. Why should you think your greatest enemy, the same people that enslaved, colonized and still pressing you down will give you a religion that will do good things for you?

[@patrickpedro6458]

One thing you all most know that, no matter what, Nigerians still like Africa America more than anyone else ❤

[@Mkym365]

Very true and a lot of Nigerian men marry African American women.

[@tonirowe1975]

@@Mkym365that’s so true I am married to a Nigerian man and we honestly have a lot in common and also we have our differences but we blend together and we have learned to respect and love our differences

[@Wazabanga1]

It is simple..Most African Americans have west African ancestry especially Ghana and Nigeria so that is the reason why..Blood is always thicker than water

[@voguehaven5154]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣@@Mkym365

[@chikaajene7683]

Do African American really like Nigerian men .. or just the stereotypical glitz and glamour associated with Nigerian men. It’s all fun and games until they are faced with marriage ,raising kids , dealing with extended families , religious and cultural belief , respect and so on .

[@damilolamonehin7877]

I really appreciate his perspective on a number of things. It seemed like she was asking questions more for a self qualification assessment. It's also a good practice to avoid touching people in professional interviews

[@amaradumbuya2099]

As African man from Sierra Leone it is an African man culture to take care of the woman and the household,no 50/50,if we take woman out we are paying all the way all the time,same with shopping

[@PhyllisShepherd]

Nothing is wrong with that. Is the woman allowed to have a career or business?

[@1653tlw]

You sir do not know our history...Black Americans take care of our families also. Up until the 1970s things has gotten expensive in this country so both have to work.If it wasn't for black Americans fighting for equal rights in the 1960s you sir would not be living in this country. I lived in West African countries and there is a lot of single parent homes.And what about all the orphanages...Please don't hand me that bull. lots of African men walk out of there families every day. I see African men stay at home while there wife goes out and work with the baby on her back. Get your facts Strat..and don't promote negative propaganda..

[@amaradumbuya2099]

​@@PhyllisShepherdoff course that what we like

[@amaradumbuya2099]

​@@1653tlwsecondly The biggest Cardinal Sin an African man can commit is not having respect from your peers,family,strangers and women in general,that why I fight every day for my respect ,respect is huge for a man in Africa it almost suicidal,that why those boys will rather die in the sea trying to get to Europe on a boat so they can provide for their family than stay at home in shame,this is real stuff baby girl I love black women and I dated a lot of them

[@DonaldOYewande]

@@PhyllisShepherd Why not? The DG of World Trade Organization is a Nigerian woman, responsible mother and a dutiful wife. The richest African woman is a Nigerian, the lists goes on and on

[@childrentoys4537]

That is why i love our Nigerian men. They are naturally leaders & very confident.

[@binwoods23]

Leaders? How is Nigeria doing?

[@childrentoys4537]

@@binwoods23Politically speaking, we know we have the misfortune of bad leadership which are being led by men. However, it does not negate the fact that majority of them have successfully led in establishments, corporations & most importantly as good leaders in their homes. I don't know if you are a Nigerian or not. If you are following the political space of the country, you should know we are not resting on our oars to to shut the mouth of people like you very soon.

[@fataiadegbenro984]

​@@binwoods23we aren't doing a good job on the collective unfortunately not for lack of intellectual capabilities to do so but selfish and unpatriotic interests but I believe we are seeing the advantage of collective over individuals now and watch out for the country

[@Music-yq8qc]

​@binwoods23 The Same way every other black community is doing. Neo colonialism is behind Nigeria down fall

[@hashtagblackwomen-ih6iu]

Leading in what? Flies and Mud huts? Since when are black American women begging to be a part of this. Im cracking up 😂😂😂

[@changestartsnow5116]

Just because we don't worship tribalism doesn't mean we don't have culture as FBAs

[@AkireMaru]

Don’t have a culture? The interviewer is as smart as a box of rocks. One 2 second search on the internet would allow her to understand the definition of culture. Blacks do have culture. It may not be highly esteemed, but it’s everything from the way they speak, the names the call their kids (which are unique - you can easily spot “black names”), to the food and music they listen to. I’m truly baffled she, as a black woman, would say something like that.

[@franman576]

Yes that interviewer is an embarassment.

[@hazelhanover8935]

She mean black American woman is not train and cultured or raise like a African woman is raise but hip hop music is America culture

[@jamash7143]

Nigerians are just conservative as a society. Culture dictates everything we do as a people. The culture is also what is responsible for the majority of our society in this country.

[@mariejane1567]

Who said FBA women want to marry these men??? I don't know ANY fba women clamoring over african men.....

[@sk-wf2dn]

Me either!!

[@giftoghas636]

Then who cares

[@DirtyEdon]

The problem is nobody wants to marry black American women...

[@chiefpharoah]

no one is marrying FBA women, so you have mute point! Don't just dismiss these men, go look at their success record in your community. Who is the prise and who is winning...tell yourself the truth and shame your devil!

[@durangobasics6195]

People are marrying each other "on the ground", not on the internet.

[@avigrett1484]

I went against my mum and married an American lady and I payed a price . I was cocooned from my family.A lot of Alimony. I am full of regrets. Never be blinded by love . An American woman will leave you at your weakest moment. Like he said not every hypothesis is 100%.

[@ekwejohnson6965]

Marriage is business for the Akata's

[@obdanny2000]

​​@@ekwejohnson6965Stop calling them akatar, thats very disrespectful

[@EvwienureEjowokeoghene-uh5iq]

​@@ekwejohnson6965Nigerians living in America are also called akata in Nigeria

[@donkarsh]

@@obdanny2000stfu bruh, akata simply means black American and Oyinbo means white American

[@obdanny2000]

@donkarsh They don't like it, so shut up. People use it in a condescending manner and you know it.

[@ImeUdo-ObongMesoEx]

I like this conversation with NOSH. I am Nigerian and I believe conversations like this must be happening constantly to close the gap and understanding between our cultures. It matters so much that we understand each other more and more. We actually need each other....especially in THIS generation.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Thank you for watching and understanding my approach! I respect the African culture and also love being an African American woman. We will continue to educate and positively promote change in our communities. 🙏🏽❤️✨

[@tamiausten873]

True dat. My cousins in America are married to African Americans. One in New York, the other in Dallas. Another is married to a white man. We are all people. I've always loved African American stuff, from movies to songs to comedy and even the way they speak. I know the loss of African culture is there but watching them, it seems like not much is different. In church Nigerians dress up and African Americans do same. The flashy and extravagant head gear might be of different types but the idea is the same 😂😂 the negroe women in different colors in the church and big head gears, either gele or hats 😂😂😂.

[@Mkym365]

Also, If an African American woman is willing to accept the Nigerian culture & understand it, she will be Exactly what Nigerian men needs as long as other wife able qualities aRe present.

[@ashburnconnecttv7860]

#Tribalism

[@Mkym365]

@@ashburnconnecttv7860 Not really!

[@godschild4615]

@Mkym. But she wont accept polygamy though should the man decide to take a second wife

[@user-gt8dt7bu2t]

​@@godschild4615correct. I told him I'm not down with that. He says I'm not either. Thank goodness. 😂🎉❤

[@user-gt8dt7bu2t]

I'm willing. I love the culture. Love from. 🇺🇸

[@mythoughts1763]

THIS INTERVIEWER IS TOO DISRESPECTFUL, SHAMEFUL, AND DISTASTEFUL!! TOO THIRSTY!!

[@UNSCRIPTEDSHAWNRAY]

I totally agree with you. trust me she is giving African American Ladies a bad rep

[@mythoughts1763]

@@UNSCRIPTEDSHAWNRAY SHE IS TRYING REAL BAD!!!!!

[@aidan2849]

@@mythoughts1763she’s African American?

[@mythoughts1763]

@@aidan2849 IDK, BUT I AM CONFUSED HERE, WHAT IS THE POINT!!!!

[@aidan2849]

@@mythoughts1763 even me as Nigerian American knows AA’s have cukture I’ve literally seen and participated in it in school, block parties(which is an AA creation, and the music genres they’ve created which I’ve listened to. Not to mention west central, and east Africans as well as bantu but specifically west Africans have superior physical genetics to the rest of the world which is scientifically proven the result of which we can see in the sport world. So I don’t get why an AA is belittling their own achievements when the whole world is entertained by them. An entertainment isn’t where it stops, they have also helped industrially even when massacres happened to tear their businesses down.

[@uchennanwosu4625]

Informative! The Nigerian brother is very intelligent and insightful. The host is entreatable. Her humility enables her extract information. She is equally brilliant. I don't think Nigerians dislike Black Americans. It's simply about perceptions, trust, and culture. Personally, I have difficulty communicating with Black Americans. The first time I encountered a Black American male, I was eager to connect because I felt we had a kindred spirit. I found him to be guarded. It was almost as if he was suspicious of me. Over the years, I discovered he wasn't the exception. Black Americans have their perception of Africans. I don't necessarily know the roots of these notions but especially among the men, it makes a close relationship a challenge. The American experience of the Black brother can be very confining. He has adapted based on historical and circumstantial lessons. The truth is that the world is far bigger than America. Blacl men in particular will benefit from travel outside the shores of this country. With the women, it's less of a problem. They have their stereotypes of Africans, but they seem to be more inquisitive. They are women at the end of the day. If they find a man attractive, they will take the risk. Black Americans women tend to be take charge. They feel they can get the man to align with their program. They will be quick to point out to an African man that they will not be subjected to the traditional role - their notion of the role of women. This is where the problem lies on both sides. The Nigerian man, in particular, is groomed to be a leader. Nobody is going to push him around. He demands respect from his woman. He will treat her like the queen only when he is convinced she is willing to cooperate. Just like their Black American brother, they feel that they have options. It's very rare that a man will disintegrate because he can not have a particular woman. I have personally met Black American women that are marriage ready. They are strong Christians. Their faith makes them a little more submissive and willing to be subject to a man. I think that we are living in a time that women as a whole are reconsidering feminism. They are weighing their options. Nigerian men are beginning to marry African American women. This is the result of pentecostal Christianity. It is breaking barriers. A man is destined by God to be a leader. He is a groom. He should be able to positively influence his woman. People don't come perfect. Love is a most effective shaping tool.

[@juliatripp2010]

Well said. Id be submissive to a true leader, a kind and loving man. But so man AA men are hostile, and self hating I have learned to avoid them. I love African men, but dont know many, and I do think that there would be challenges. Im older now and content to watch this all play out from a distance

[@jacklyneverage3881]

Why are you practicing a religion that isn't of your culture? Look here. How are you folks always bragging on your culture this and that but you uphold that British Western culture, worship a white Jesus, and practice a religion your people never invented? That Nigerian is an arrogant and an entitled bigot and that woman failed to promote her culture in a positive light because she is self loathing. Black Americans have a culture, and Black American women aren't chasing down African men for marriage. In fact, the opposite is happening that African men are aggressively pursuing Black American women for dating and mating as well as their own women. I never had to pursue or convince an African nowhere to date me at all. And I recently had two aggressively pursuing me! Again, we have our own culture and it is imitated the whole world over. At least parts of it. No one from Africa who got colonized by Euros and Asians and influenced by them cannot sit there arrogantly as if they were not impacted and they retained their culture 100% when they didn't and many outright reject certain aspects of their culture. You aren't going to preach to me about culture this and that when you fleeing to other countries and not using that great culture to build your own nation and it hasn't corrected your corruption or your tribalism! Get out of here with that!

[@tayomed]

There's no one answer to this question. I've met some really awesome American sisters who I would have married if not for the relocation issue. Most Africans who plan on moving back to Africa in the future would have a hard time relocating an American woman and her kids back to Africa. So, the man would have to go back to Africa alone and remarry over there if he's really determined to move back. I've seen African men "stuck" in America due to marrying AAs, white, Filipina and Hispanic women. The issue isn't really about anything wrong with Black American women, the issue is just a logistic issue.

[@done5060]

Just like you said - no one answer. Everyone does what is best for them. One thing I know is if the couple have excellent communication, there is no issue about this.. I just shared on another thread on this vlog… 6yrs after my mum married a Yoruba man, already with two kids, they both returned to Nigeria… my mum keeps saying till date.. that’s the best decision of her life. Interestingly, I’ve seen couples in same situation where “moving to Africa” is a negative game changer for the relationship

[@karinamoses790]

They don’t have to do anything they plan to leave their children in America that’s just a man with selfish desires they should just stick with the African ladies instead of using Americans

[@karinamoses790]

And nobody is stuck everyone is free to move around they feel trapped cause they planned to be trapped for green card

[@deardapson9311]

Akata means Panther, because the first time Nigerians were exposed to African American was through Fela Kuti the creator of Afrobeat. When he came to NYC, he was hosted by the Black Panther movement. When he return to Nigeria, he changed his style to revolutionary music. Back then Nigerians assume all African Americans are members of the Black Panther Movement and the loved it. Akata is a Yoruba word Panther. It's the other tribes telling their African American friends that it means Animal because they don't know the roots or the meaning.

[@adjoa-anima]

Wild cat

[@TheHairloveundone]

100 percent correct

[@michaeli6280]

@@adjoa-anima A panther is a wild cat isn’t it? You are a Ghanaian interpreting the Yoruba language wrongly, this is how ignorance is spread

[@blackseed9293]

​@@michaeli6280Are you saying the explanation is incorrect?

[@akendon7260]

Stop claiming what you don't know. I speak Yoruba and Igbo. Akata is an Igbo word for chaos, dysfunction and instability. Basically a thing or person that causes chaos and dysfunction. It's another word for Pokie and Ray Ray. You will notice Nigerians use it solely for Pokie and Ray Ray. I'll post videos of Igbo songs saying Akata in it to prove this. Post a yoruba video saying Akata.

[@shalanda411]

I enjoyed this conversation. It’s rare for me to watch podcasts but this topic is dear to me as I am a lover of African culture and find myself dating within that pool of people. This conversation sheds light on what it’s like from both perspectives if you’re looking to date intercultural.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Thank you for watching! I appreciate your ability to truly understand the goal. ✨

[@bettysmith5678]

I love being African American and wouldn't change if I could... Had the best of upbringings. Good morals happy childhood life,.both parents like no other.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

I can relate… I also had an amazing upbringing… and I wouldn’t change being African American, yep, both parents… life was whole. I simply wish we had a respectable culture that many can relate to… it’s not disrespect.

[@kellesbestbeaches]

Excatly raised with 4 sisters, both parents, all went to college, 3 of us married. Great childhood, they hang with ratchet club girls and equate all black women to that standard, ridiculously ignorant.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

@@kellesbestbeaches I love that! Both of my parents are married, aunts and uncles… great foundation. We all went to college, morals and values… but how can we help the younger generations have those same values?

[@letstalkovercocktails]

@@kellesbestbeaches it is ridiculous and ignorant but that’s what I’m saying… because the culture is so loose and respectful traditions are not passed on….the internet and entertainment is raising them. That’s exactly what I’m saying. I went to a private social marketing meeting… they had pictures displayed of different types of “subjects” you had to stereotype this person based off society/marketing… there were black business men, rappers, video vixens, lawyers and doctors displayed- all African American. The question to the mix race group was, who has the greater influence…. 76% said The AA person, the next question was, with what influence/ culture… 90% said the entertainer/ rapper represented the AA culture. It’s quite interesting…

[@kellesbestbeaches]

@@letstalkovercocktails That is quite interesting but not surprising. In 2007 I sported dred locks in Nigeria while living there with my family. It was so surprising that my Sista locs were my hair. In the US Nigerian community when I first started them, Nigerian women were so negative calling me Dada Mama😁, am I going to comb my hair, why should I be doing that to my hair? P sqaure and Flavor afrobeat started and bam it was popular, and women started having them as well as men. Those stars also started having children out of wedlock openly and it seemed to be an upswing at that same time. That study is accurate 👌

[@verdaylove]

We are broken and also thriving. The beautiful duality of life. We are still African afteralllllll. :)

[@___john3934]

"I am Nigerian i don't live in the USA .Personally, I find it easier to converse with Caucasian women than with African American women. I believe it's merely a matter of perception. I think that white women tend to be more compassionate and understanding. Personally, I sense that African Americans can sometimes be quick to degrade or belittle me due to my African heritage, and at times, they speak very rapidly. However, I do like them, and I wish I could engage with them more, but I often feel somewhat apprehensive."

[@nezinez2694]

Very sad comment.

[@jeffreytube]

They tend to be too toxic. I'm sorry to say that but what I see on social media tells me that

[@chimaobi3747]

@@jeffreytube social media contain many lies

[@jefflugard5483]

U are very correct my brother

[@carlitosway644]

This is not true. Social media doesn't always represent Black American women in the best light. Also I've found that the way Africans speak to white women or white people in general is oh so gentle. When speaking with AA, Africans tend to be condescending and less respectful. It's like you think you're so much better than AA. Btw, I've been married to a Nigerian for over 20 yrs. I've seen this first hand.

[@sbmars7137]

Do people in America even realise that in Africa, Nigeria included, most men would not even marry a woman who is not if their tribe? This is not a Nigerian/African vs American African issue...it's about people who are raised to marry their own

[@DonaldOYewande]

How old are you? You spoke like a 60 year old.

[@tigerinthecityalozie2812]

That's not true any longer. Things have changed.

[@carlitosway644]

I feel like this is true for certain tribes but not for all tribes. I'm a AA married to an Igbo man for almost 21 yrs.

[@sbmars7137]

@@tigerinthecityalozie2812 It hasn't changed that much.There's still inter-tribal fights in most African countries : checkout the herdsmen Vs farmers in Nigeria.Politics is still very tribal in most African countries: check out the last gubernatorial elections in Lagos state. When you're in love, you're in a bubble and think the world is as colourful as your bubble

[@sbmars7137]

@@carlitosway644 It's true literally for all tribes ... every family's wishes their son marry the beautiful girl from down the street. It's individuals that make the exception, not the tribe.

[@osascorpomoregie8104]

The fact he said we Nigerians spend on our women made you happy and I believe it made a lot of American black women happy but there is something he didn’t say, we also care about respect, if I’m taking care of you the least you can give me is your submission and complete respect which I believe the black American man yearns for from black American women which most of them don’t want to do, so let the black American women fix their issues of submission and I believe the black American men will take better care of them.

[@CapricornDayz]

If a man needs a woman to submit to him, he has an issue with his own self-esteem and wants the woman to lower her standards to meet his.

[@james56660]

@@CapricornDayz+ Not at all. If I’m taking care of home.The least you can do is be respectful. It’s not too much to ask.Nigerian men are Sigma males and would like to navigate their ships without running it aground with a co-pilot.

[@osascorpomoregie8104]

@@CapricornDayz if as a person you do not understand gender roles in a family setting you have a long learning to do, life is not a multivational class where you get a mentor to boost you confidence all the time in order to do what is required of you to keep the family going, if you lack basic respect for anyone at all around you, you have a lot to learn, if you can decide to marry a person it should be the one you think you can trust because you know he can lead you through the right path but if the least you can give Is your submission to his leadership for the growth of the family then what stops you from doing that, the problem of the west and America is thinking we all can switch into different gender roles, everyone has a responsibility of manning their post, be a woman and act on your responsibilities and stop thinking of how to take the place of a man. You’ve not even been able to completely carry out your responsibilities you want to take upon yourself the responsibilities of a man.

[@user-gn1gf8kq9d]

You are SPOT ON!!!! 🔥👍

[@tonirowe1975]

I completely disagree with you on this one

[@ajayiolugbenga3595]

This guy is absolutely telling the truth. He is honest and representative of us. I agree with him 100%

[@kolaafolabi3688]

In an iota of words, Nigerians see black African Americans as brothers and sisters in the first instance but feel terribly bad and disappointed when they are totally different from being friendly, loving brothers and sisters we wish they be. I presume a lot of African Americans don’t see African as real brothers, I may be wrong

[@caramelkisses8396]

There are so many that do see you as our brothers and sisters. I can honestly say that from most Nigerians, and Ghanaians that I know or see on SM, and in movies feel that way. However, the same can't be said for a lot of other African countries who don't see us as such.

[@miacrawfordmc]

I see Nigerians as my sisters and brothers! On the other hand, I’ve had some express that “you’re not African American” because I wasn’t born in Africa. That pisses me off

[@wb6266]

It depends. All humans are the same. Just like any other group, there are a lot of different opposing cultures, perspectives, and people within the African-American community. Some see Africans as brothers and sisters and CANNOT WAIT to be part of the community or visit different African countries. Others are ashamed of being black, and will make fun of their own people and of course, Africans, and everyone else. The same goes for different Africans I meet; some hate us, and some love us...

[@ashburnconnecttv7860]

R U deflecting?

[@jayfizz545]

@@caramelkisses8396well genetically most of you guys are Nigerian or Ghanaian, others don’t see you that way bc africa is very divided and you guys aren’t really their kin

[@ronj7658]

To an average African, African American culture is incomplete due to the long separation from their ancestors.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

I agree with the 💯 this is on the the realist comments. Bingo! That’s where the cultural divide starts for AA… that’s all I’m saying. When you understand your foundation- in Anything… you hold value and longevity.

[@ronj7658]

@letstalkovercocktails indeed. We are in the information age now so I believe we can all learn from each other and our cultures will eventually coalesce.

[@sherryamanfor]

I agree

[@chinneynz7861]

Ain't that the truth though ?

[@jacklyneverage3881]

Africans don't even practice their culture when they worshipping in religions they did not create and worshipping their Euro colonizers! Black American culture is incomplete. It's intact and suitable for our environment and circumstances. No, we don't need your tribalism and ethnic hatred.

[@chibuzorisrael5878]

I understand the host when she said, “African Americans do not have a culture”. As Nigerians, we can identify a person’s tribe by their looks, clothes, Names, and accents. Our tribes are unique, and our cultures are very different although you may find a few similarities the differences are so vast. Our meals, looks, names, languages, festivals, history, houses, masquerades, and traditional religions are different. Our forms of communication, greetings, proverbs, and gestures are unique. The Rich, Poor, and middle class exist. Many Nigerians in the US can be from any of such backgrounds. Most Nigerians who hustle so hard are those from poor backgrounds. Nigerians also have a middle ground because, for a country of over 500 unique languages and over 300 tribes, we communicate in English, Most Nigerians understand “Pidgin English” which is our preferred means of communication. Marriage is sacred for Nigerians, we do about three weddings to marry a woman as a wife. The court wedding, the church, and the traditional wedding. We don’t do divorce, for most of it, Marriage is until death do you part. I think another reason Nigerians don’t take AA women seriously is because of divorce, and the divorce laws in America. A divorced man in Nigeria can foot the bills of his kids without paying child support, the Kids can stay with whichever parent is financially stable.

[@patricklee2659]

I am a Nigerian living in Wisconsin and looking for a good AA to marry. These ladies are damn good. There are good and bad people everywhere. Am still open and searching!

[@alhenzyemma2957]

Good conversations & she is beautiful as well. As a Nigerian 🇳🇬 he was honest too.

[@ThreeHundredd]

43:09 The general reason why Nigerian men hesitate to marry American women is because we think Americans in general do not take marriage seriously , are quick to opt out , do not cope well with structure and extended family this is the summary . The cultural differences . As a Nigerian I am not certain an American woman will be able to hold a family long term ,she could leave anytime even if things are going well . Another big issue is structure , an American woman will not be comfortable in the traditional family structure . It also seems like celebrities lead the culture in America which is detrimental to marriages . Others could include differences in perceived moral values or standards . Even if she’s a good person , she may do what the american system allows her to do like divorce just because she can and not because things are that bad . Besides that they are cool individuals but these reasons cast doubts on long term viability. I dated an AA for about 2 years , I grew to like her however i just wasn’t confident enough to take it further (long term) . American women are cute and likable as friends but for someone that takes marriage seriously it’s a big decision , a huge risk. Except if she’s the type of person that knows how to make a man 1000 % confident about her . These are my thoughts / observations

[@ekwejohnson6965]

He didn't articulate his thoughts

[@adaorahi]

Valid points and 100% accurate. Cul😊differences play a huge role

[@kellesbestbeaches]

What about the recent divorce rate in the Nigerian community has doubled?

[@callmecat9715]

Your response is pretty silly lol. There is no woman on the PLANET who divorces a man “just because she can” 😂 A woman will divorce a man because he’s either abusive mentally and or physically, distant, lazy, confrontational and mean, a cheater (and we all know Nigerian men are notorious for being cheaters), someone who could care less about providing for her emotional needs because he’s only all about himself, and so on and so forth. It’s not just about bringing home a paycheck dude! It’s about bringing home ALL OF YOU. You are suppose to contribute more than just a check in a healthy, functional relationship. American women, as opposed to traditional Nigerian women understand that…. they MATTER just as much as a man does. Her position isn’t to be the servant of the house, but to be an equal and respected partner. So if this mentality supposedly makes American women " not marriage material” then….. THANK GOD 😂😂😂

[@victorylapp]

@@kellesbestbeaches Some people get americanized once in America

[@Nwankwo1234]

Well…..all I can say is; I’m a AA woman who married a sweet handsome African King and so glad I did. I’ll do it all over again. On top of it all I told him I’m excited to know when the time comes we will be moving back to his village. My husband’s culture is my culture, we are one now. All I want is to make him the happiest man on this earth until Christ comes. I’m so in love with him until I wish I could stand on a mountain top and tell the world.

[@bukumiBrown]

it’s so much to say about this interview but honestly i couldn’t even finish it. i literally felt i’ll watching This woman feed all these inaccuracies and false Narratives. as for the guy i have nothing to say, he is speaking from his experiences and what i would call a limited base. im so disappointed in this lady as an African American. i encourage anyone viewing this to take these about my people with a grain of salt. please seek FACTS and speak with those who have PRIDE AND KNOWLEDGE IN AFRICAN AMERICAN CULTURE!!! YES FOLKS I SAID ***CULTURE*** Blessings to everyone ❤

[@avigrett1484]

Why are you people so emotional and easily triggered ?

[@jamman8678]

Brother your right in every society you have good and bad. But let’s be honest. Our people lost their culture as the late dr Henry Clark put it. This was by design. Yet Africans who are born in the Americans do behave the same at times.

[@mariejane1567]

is she FBA?

[@mariejane1567]

@@avigrett1484you people? It's giving tethered white supremacy

[@undergee8609]

Facts. There is a culture and ut is beautiful when it is adhered to. I say this as a Nigerian HBCU grad. I have seen multigenerational black excellence and it’s beautiful and highly inspirational. These guys have low standards as is evident in their choices and decide to paint everyone with the same brush. Madness.

[@kellesbestbeaches]

I was married 20 years to an Igbo man he had a mid life crisis and would not get therapy for his attraction to teenagers 😢

[@ikhowaka1471]

Therapy???😅😅😅 oh my God.. you made my day. Haven't laughed in almost a month. Thank you.

[@kellesbestbeaches]

@@ikhowaka1471 it would have saved our marriage but he refused to get help, I wish it wasn't taboo in the community, especially Igbos have PTSD if they were a child in the Biafra conflict.

[@chrismog286]

Most igbo men like younger women. If that's the reason for divorce, then there would be no marriages😂

[@kellesbestbeaches]

@@chrismog286 she was 14 years old and we almost had our children taken away because we have two teens. Of course his brothers see nothing wrong with molesting secondary and primary school girls.. He is 10 years older than me. I know self discipline is hard for Nigerian men....

[@giftfromabove2107]

😂😂 are you a troll or just a bitter person?? Your bitter and negative comments are littered everywhere. Are you hungry or is it the time of the month? You need to chill.

[@jetblack1854]

We dont struggle with no damn identity. Black women struggle with having a positive identity

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Hmm that can be true… but doesn’t that derive from a lack of generational/ traditional culture?

[@jetblack1854]

What, black women sold their identity out when they sold black men out and bought into the whyte man's feminism. As black people, when the men were in charge, we had values, traditions, language and religion. Now most foreigners from west africa don't even know their birthday or their grandparents birthdays. Foreign blacks are the ones who lack culture and identity. Most of those tribes today are a result of colonialism. Foreign black have know knowledge of their history of their origins . Foreign blacks cannot trace their lineage pre colonialism

[@Boon159]

We…sho DONT struggle with identity….we know who we are….

[@lolam751]

As a Nigerian woman, I really enjoyed this interview. I would love to see African Americans marry Nigerians/Africans and have their children learn more about African culture. This will enable us close the divide and resolve some underlying negative issues prevailent in the African American communtity. Just as Nigerians have a lot of love to give African Americans, we need all the love in marriage, in friendship, in business from African Americans. I love the host for those tough questions and NOSH's honest answers.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Thank you so much! As an African American woman I absolutely love the culture as many people of African descent have become family to me. The more we know… the more we grow! 🫶🏽

[@lolam751]

@@letstalkovercocktails Absolutely sis!

[@aissatamuhammad2581]

My aunt is married to a Nigerian...the Idehen's are my in-laws. Verrry nice people. 🤗

[@doolittlefirstking6388]

Its basically culture difference!!! As an african/ Nigerian woman, you dare not be rude to your MIL, call her by name or talk back at them! But its the norm in the states... Nigerian women marry the whole family not just the man! And their marriages are for better for worse, not dropping their husband at the first sight of trouble.

[@nyaintunyaintu509]

Exactly! Most Africans/Nigerian men date and marry African women… I’m just laughing at these comments

[@SweetArt360]

I saw the channel mention in a comment about how its not a culture others/many can relate to. I think part of that is also how far out the US is from the rest of the world. Whereas in continents such as Africa, Europe, or Asia the countries are more connected sharing more similarities. It's likely also more easier and affordable for people to relocate or visit all over it. Whereas north America is a lot more disconnected from the rest of the world, leading to a more different culture and one that others may find less relatable. Though to me that's okay, being unique is also good. 😊

[@arisewitharica]

This whole interview pissed me off 😤 Both are ignorant and do not need to speak on behalf of their entire communities, African American or Nigerian. There's so much misinformation in this interview. As someone who has studied in Ghana, has a degree in Africana Studies, lives in Nigeria, and married to a Nigerian, I will say African Americans & Nigerians are more similar than different. Hell, many of us African Americans, African peoples in the diaspora, are from the yoruba tribe. I wish there was more understanding between us instead of judgment or perpetuating stereotypes. Some of Nigeria/Nigerians face very similar issues in their communities/cultural context. And, there's plenty of African American women & Nigerian men who are happily married. This host needs to get more exposure. This interview was sad to watch! 🇺🇸❤️🇳🇬

[@youmeandtherestofus]

Nah. It was pretty accurate.

[@youmeandtherestofus]

Nah. It was pretty accurate.

[@theancientvoice9272]

As African, I always see American culture as predominantly African American culture. You have a culture, just like Carribeans have and so forth. And I will add to say, don't believe African cultures are safe from other influences, via Islam, Christianity, colonisation and so forth. But ultimately, I think we're all stuck with what is actually culture ? It's dynamic, it does change, mute, borrow to adapt. The Nigerian man in front of you, has a different culture from his ancestors few centuries ago, they would probably not identity with a lot things. For example religion. The same way you dislike the use of your culture in the American capitalistic environment, the same I dislike part of African cultures. The only difference is yours has a big zoom on it.

[@TheYakora]

Very smart man. I hope she reads this comment.

[@cauliflowerpower41]

AA wish they had a language

[@malissawhite4569]

Beloved, YOU can only speak for YOURSELF because I’m ONE WHO KNOWS WHO I AM!

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Bless you

[@parishers6351]

My cousin is from Jamaica. He married this African American woman but realize very quickly that he has to clean and cook because she does nothing of that sort. He’s goes to work while she’s home. Il

[@user-hy4xz1qt9h]

That's crazy

[@irenegaruba48]

Is he trying to get citizenship?

[@johnalkire464]

I think everyone has culture. I understand what you mean feeling like an outsider with your Nigerian friends. My wife is Igbo and its was a flood of culture i had to absorb from the start. But i love it. I dont have much family in the US so it was nice to see and feel that closeness within the family. Hard to feel included when you are just called the Oyibo the to start with lol. And you better believe Nigerian man or woman will bring their culture with them you bets believe that. And it will become your culture too. We have found a balance of both cultures and in a way created our own. But we adhere to most Igbo traditions regardless so in my opinion its a beautiful blend. So of you live someone and have mutual respect for each other the culture will become its own. And dont worry. You will eat enough Jollof rice that you will become Nigerian through your stomach 😂. I think love is the worlds most universal language. After that is food.

[@tanishanightingale]

African Americans do have culture and food. What the hell is she saying? I am from Panamá in Central America and I can say African American have culture and food.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

You’re from Central America… that’s a culture. Carly is from LA… family came in by way slavery … there is no culture. Twerking and slave food is not apart of a transitional culture… it is a manufactured culture created by the media and people adapted…

[@sweetjr25]

@@letstalkovercocktails Central America and the Caribbean culture came from SLAVES too, genius. READ A BOOK!!!

[@jacklyneverage3881]

@@letstalkovercocktails Slave food! Central America has slave food then! Because they also endured slavery! Twerking came from Africa and they do it today! We don't have a manufactured culture by the media! Slavery was before that media you ignorant person! We have soul food and it was plant based and it consists of foods that came from Africa and incorporates African cooking styles and it is mainly vegetables, fish, and poultry and grains! All those foods didn't originate in slavery! And the ones that did, that came from farm to table! It was organic! So then call farm to table food slave food!

[@ramonataylor6246]

Huh? Then how did more African slaves end up in Panama/South America than the U.S? By way of slavery. You are not very educated, please please go back and learn. Each culture developed in the diaspora based on tradition from Africa and some of it that was lost and diffused with Spanish/French Catholic or English Protestant cultures. This new identity and culture is absolutely culture. From LA to Panama. Okra, plantain, rice, fried foods, red colored drinks , Juneteenth celebrations (I’m a Texan), music born from our own communities now emulated all over the world, such as gospel, jazz, blues, country, rock, R&B, rap, historically black frats and sororities that are mostly generational and now have West African college student members, black inventors, debutante balls among the upper class Blacks,, the Harlem Renaissance which influenced literary movements and revolutionary movements worldwide from the 1920s to the 1960s, the Black church in itself had enough culture to circle the earth-from the large hats designed by black women to the linguistical oration of black preachers emulated by both White American and international preachers worldwide, to fashion trends, and even “slang” that becomes so popular, it changes the American English dictionary! The Geechie and Gullah cultures along the SE coast of the U.S. The creole cultures of Louisiana and distinct styles of dress and dance and Vodun rituals for ancestors derived from both Africa and converted Catholicism, and I, myself am a proud descendent of black farmers in Texas. Our Family reunion has been on held our land each summer for 70 years. I have my masters in history, because I love and admire ALL cultures. Everyone has a culture, including my Nigerian husband of 18 years! He has been so open to learning about Blacks’ past in America. I’m sorry YOU are not cultured, but at least you could’ve done some homework and understood this man is very limited in his exposure to AA if you were going to host a so called real conversation.

[@cherylizegbu3581]

Mr. Nigeria, I've been to Lagos. Death is a daily occurrence there. Because you have traveled, you can gaslight people who haven't, but don't get it twisted. Clean up the corruption that continues to run amok, and then You can talk about African Americans!

[@Barbiette123]

You know Black Men rather talk, prance like peacocks and subjugate women, than improve their communities and lead by example...lol

[@chinneynz7861]

This is exactly what he was alluding to. Don't get triggered when you hear the truth. He never said his country was perfect, heck Americans get shot everyday, even in schools. The point is that if AA cultures starts valuing family and their men stop the dead-beat culture, you would be surprised by what will unfold. When you guys (AA) don't value your own BEAUTIFUL womwn, then whoi is going to value or want them?

[@htownqueen663]

​@chinneynz7861 as an American I second this.

[@destinyadam1160]

Why are you upset he's right

[@tyronelorenzovalentio3414]

@@chinneynz7861why are you only blaming the men?

[@Takeitorweaveitbeauty]

My blood is boiling 😡 I’m proud of being African American! Nothing is wrong with us… we’ve just been through a lot… we all have! Africans are not perfect they have the same problems too…. I know several west Africans ! Nigerians Ghanaian’s,Cameroonians ,Gambians etc Go to Lagos and see how perfect they are!!!! All black is excellent and beautiful!Don’t bash us like we’re so messed up …. Im tired of that! I’m extremely disappointed. You are literally lying on US! How sad.

[@undergee8609]

I am Nigerian and I endorse this message. The host needs some self pride. It’s unfortunate that she said nothing positive about her own kind. Horrid and cringeworthy display of pick me behaviour.

[@363y]

Giirrrlll I stared to comment on this but I said you know what I’m not!. But one thing I’m going to say is that this is “NOT A US THING”! Speak for yourself!!. Crazy smh 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@tayomed]

You're right. Africans have a lot of societal and ideological issues to work on, just like Black people all over the world. There's a lot we can learn from each other.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

@@tayomed I appreciate that comment. You’re right!

[@Nethanda]

Lmao you lot chat shit about Africans too. I mean its your men on YT calling African women ugly so stop acting all hurt, holy, and innocent.

[@emexokezie7796]

Firstly, as a British born Nigerian, this is so endearingly beautiful to see... I'm an ambassador for the African - Caribbean - USA unity by action as regards interaction with our peoples everywhere.... That's my religion, not church. However, black Americans Do have a culture which is so infectious on the entire black race for the most part... The beauty of the music.. Especially real soul.. Listen to groups like CHANGE, BB&Q.... the Hip hop,... Stations like WBLS in New York,... Hot 97.....thats just music and entertainment alone we garnered out of the pain of the enemy of both of us.... The pain of exclusion.... There's the intelligence, inventions hidden from our own educational knowledge... No wonder Einstein was endeared to us... This constellation of our own self creative endeavour borne out of deliberate external denial from the other race is culture enough and is beyond reproach! Love to us all... 🥂

[@youmeandtherestofus]

Sheesh 😬

[@DJMIKEONZ]

The one question ive been trying to get answered is this.. why do some African American women refer to themselves as 'BITCH' ... yet absolutely want to be 'Respected' ? Why not a different more respect worthy, positive nametag. Just wondering.

[@ramonataylor6246]

This type of question is when I know someone is very naive to American culture. Hispanic and White women play around with the same word, and just like some negative racial words can be used in a new definition, some women may use this as a term that means strong or a feminist. And majority of ALL American women do not even refer to themselves as this. You are regurgitating “pop” culture and trends.

[@orimidaraolusola569]

I know this AA parents that come over to their daughter's live in boyfriend's home regularly to spend the weekend,my mother, the mum of the boyfriend was shocked to the marrow! No Nigerian parent will stay over in the guy's house until he's married their daughter

[@isaac9ice]

My Nigerian brother spoke very well.

[@lamerrab7507]

Why do Africans feel like they have the right to tell African Americans anything......why are African Americans always the topic of discussion. Is there nothing about Nigeria that needs improvement. African Americans are attracted by every group of ppl no matter what skin color.

[@iykejnr6296]

The host is AA

[@lamerrab7507]

@@iykejnr6296 So!

[@UniqueBeautie]

Bullsh*t. One married me. An Igbo. He was so polite and loving at 1st. After the I Do's, he treated me like total Sh*t. I asked him what happened to the friendship and Love he has. Always showed me. He said, "You're my wife now!" 🤯😢💔 He Only wanted Papers. My blood line is Yoruba. All of my family and friends were like WHY did u marry him. They feel like the Igbos are the Worst! I personally don't believe it was his tribe. I belit. Was hiss personality.

[@mahoganysoul7195]

It's personality, who he is .... At least that's what I think.

[@user-di6dy1oz4s]

There is always going to be a bad apple but Nigeria husband are very loving. I am a living witness. And if he won’t love me the way I wanted, I give him a love charm 😂😂😂😂 just kidding lol😂😂😂😂

[@karinamoses790]

This happened to me but children were involved found out he had a wife for 9 years in Africa they were planning a baby whilst I had mine wretched

[@izegaegbe]

Common mistake: Yoruba, Igbo, and Hausa and many others are NOT tribes! They are Ethnic groups. Sorry about the correction, but that needs to be said. Tribe is a small group of people only bigger than the family.

[@LoveAlways1002]

I'm laughing because I went to Nigeria for two weeks...... I would NEVERRRR date a Nigerian man.....not the ones I met over there & not the ones I've met over here 🙄😴 Oh but I loooooooove how they look in their outfits called a "Senator" ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ 🤯🤯Never knew AA women were infatuated with Nigerian men 🙄🙄😩 I must've missed that memo!!!!

[@victorobi20]

Why did you go to Nigeria in the first place?

[@LoveAlways1002]

@@victorobi20 My friends wedding.

[@alainalowe9507]

Me too!

[@tishreni5183]

Nigerian men are nice looking,but they're as different to Black Americans as night and day.

[@Barbiette123]

@LoveAlways1002 You are a wise woman...lol. Nigerian men are not worth the trouble, and are not particularly emotionally intelligent or humane - there are good ones, but its a gamble. In general, black men across the world seem to be underachievers AS A COLLECTIVE (Individually they might do well). I dont know why black women care/engage with topics like this. Allow these men keep talking and prancing like peacocks, while their counterparts in other races are conquering outer space....SMH

[@berryjewell3000]

Great honest and truthful conversation. American must protect the family name, image, and perception by disciplining their youth and hold family values. All foreigners view American

[@hihih8633]

we are more similar than we are different. Nigerians are amazing and I love the good and bad about my culture. I used to be judgmental, some of us grow up with better role models, those who do should lift others up and have compassion. I love the new Nigerian culture. They are beautiful, cultured and Americanized, they will change the world. Let's unite! God bless....

[@Olums12]

Brilliant conversation. Good representation Adeniyi...Humility and respect we deserved frpm our women make Nigerian men work and spend on the family. Control with love!

[@adewaleolaseni8278]

Nice interview! I like the emphasis on the fact that that the opinions are not applicable to all Afro Americans and Nigerians. What I do know is, many Nigerians do have it at the back of their minds that they're going to return back to Nigeria some day, but its usually difficult to find Afro Americans who wants to go all the way hence why you are not seeing a lot of marriages happening between the two. Regarding "knacking", this generation of nigerian women are very expressive too...and I'm talking about married women as well! Also, the cultural barriers are collapsing! There is a new breed of Nigerians who are not faced by the cultural difference! Regarding the word AKATA, it waa never intended as a derogatroy word. I think many Afro Americans are taking it out of context. The Afro americans were first called Akata in the 60s/70s! I'm talking about era of the black panther, when African Americans were leading the emancipation of black people all over the world. I still don't understand why it is now perceived as derogatory!

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Thank you for watching!! ❤️✨🙏🏽

[@sharicawhite5053]

This was a really good listen!

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Thank you!! ❤

[@theblessedblackwoman]

I actually enjoyed this interview. You have a good platform to grow your channel. My only criticim is to drop the drinks or have a table to rest it on because i was distracted, hoping you dont spill your drink. It doesn't really add to your already fine aesthetic.

[@malikahjones2271]

I’m African American and love the Nigerian culture and dating a Nigerian man for 4, and he is the kindest and loving man I have ever met and u have dated and Nigerian men are not selfish

[@iykejnr6296]

Thank you. You're welcome sis

[@tonirowe1975]

Being married to a Nigerian man and dealing with his family they can be very judgmental especially when your opinion is different and you stand strong on what you believe then you are labeled difficult but aslong as you go along with them you will be fine and I’m glad that I married a Nigerian man that is not afraid of my strength or my own opinions that He judges me from his heart and not what others think And I have come to the conclusion that I’m ok with being Different judge me for me the person for my heart not because I don’t think the same it’s really sad to see people that look like you are the most critical ❤

[@victorylapp]

Baby calm down!! haha 🇳🇬🇳🇬🇳🇬🇳🇬

[@tonirowe1975]

@@victorylappCalm down huh very calm just expressing myself so hahahaha

[@LANDCASTER206]

I think the problem we are both having as men and women in America is that we focus so much on the money. He mentioned family a few times. And I think the host was just so fascinated with being drenched with money. That's why a lot of cultures don't respect us. We're addicted to paper😅

[@kellesbestbeaches]

Nigerians whole thing is money 💰 😅😂 Nigerian women marry 1st for stability, name, status. Love is like 6th lol😅

[@callmecat9715]

@@kellesbestbeaches lol I know. People talk a whole lot of crap about African-American women because it’s easy to and we’re not protected. The truth of the matter is all women all over the world Have the same mentality lol ……so stupid.

[@tombimashri8149]

​@kelleo9213 Abd the one with the money bully's nd controles their partner for life all they will enjoy is the flashing fake life pretending probably cheating secretly in the name of marriage. It must be hard pretending one s whole life judt for money nd material stuff always plotting nd pretending.

[@kellesbestbeaches]

@@tombimashri8149 most Nigerian girls do not want struggle love. They are not ready to be broke with you these days. So many stay because of the money and the family is heavily involved in the process so they will always make excuses for the men. So many are tired, look at Yul and May Edochi they are what is really happening in Nigeria....

[@diceydaze]

to be honest, i don't mean to be rude but i kinda observe that that growing toxicity seem to emanate from the increasing consumption and exposure to American media which is often saturated with materialistic ideals .@@kellesbestbeaches

[@KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus]

Hi Carly, I really enjoyed your conversation here. Interesting to hear your perspective on our African (Nigerian) men. This is your brother from the Cameroons.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Hi Kasier, Thank you I appreciate your message. Cameroon is on my list of places to visit! I have an immense amount of respect for the culture. 🫶🏽

[@KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus]

@@letstalkovercocktails You won't be disappointed. When you get there you will understand why Cameroon is called Africa in Miniature. Shout out to me if you need a hand. Stay blessed.

[@letstalkovercocktails]

@@KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus ♥️🙏🏽

[@ramonataylor6246]

Ummm, I’d highly suggest you travel the US first From the US to Brazil, we are all part of the African diaspora. You are not very educated, please please go back and learn. Each culture developed in the diaspora based on tradition from Africa and some of it that was lost and diffused with Spanish/French Catholic or English Protestant cultures. This new identity and culture is absolutely culture. From LA to Panama. Okra, greens, plantain, rice, fried foods, Juneteenth celebrations (I’m a Texan), music born from our own communities now emulated all over the world, such as gospel, jazz, blues, country, rock, R&B, rap, historically black frats and sororities that are mostly generational and now have West African college student members, black inventors, debutante balls among the upper class Blacks,, the Harlem Renaissance which influenced literary movements and revolutionary movements worldwide from the 1920s to the 1960s, the Black church in itself had enough culture to circle the earth-from the large hats designed by black women to the linguistical oration of black preachers emulated by both White American and international preachers worldwide, to fashion trends, and even “slang” that becomes so popular, it changes the American English dictionary! The Geechie and Gullah cultures along the SE coast of the U.S. The creole cultures of Louisiana and distinct styles of dress and dance and Vodun rituals for ancestors derived from both Africa and converted Catholicism, and I, myself am a proud descendent of black farmers in Texas. Our Family reunion has been on held our land each summer for 70 years. I have my masters in history, because I love and admire ALL cultures. Everyone has a culture, including my Nigerian husband of 18 years! He has been so open to learning about Blacks’ past in America. I’m sorry YOU are not cultured, but at least you could’ve done some homework and understood this man is very limited in his exposure to AA if you were going to host a so called real conversation.

[@stephenoyoko4143]

I am from Kenya and I live in Dallas, TX. Some years back I met a beautiful young AA woman from California., she had arrived in TX by way of Japan, we started liking each other, one evening I took her out to my favorite American restaurant. We had a good time and we’re there for about three hours. Eventually we had to leave and paid for the tab with a credit card and tipped the wait cash. Man all hell broke loose, what the hell did I tip the waitress for. Long story short, that was the end of it.

[@sisterkamilah4373]

Tipping is very normal. Some women are too insecure. She wasn’t a good one obviously but not all are like that.

[@stellacheptanui5690]

Pole boss next time come to UK😰

[@irenegaruba48]

Too much jealousy and unfamiliarity with generosity.

[@ramonataylor6246]

Your story doesn’t make sense. She sounds like a classy AA woman. Most AA women tip well, and is a normal thing. You may have missed the real reason why it ended.

[@anniejames3059]

In Nigeria the men will provide for woman and the kids that is a Nigerian men upbringing

[@tombimashri8149]

Yes but it comes at a price. The women nd children hv no voice they are under control nd hv to always be submissive for hubby Daddy's money

[@heavensent197]

They kick you out of the house when they are done with you.

[@tonirowe1975]

@@tombimashri8149atleast someone is being honest here ❤

[@chinneynz7861]

Indeed!!!!

[@rubydawnintl]

All Skin Folks Are Not Kin Folk. Most of the host's opinions reflect a willfully ignorant and desperately thirsty perspective of African American lifestyles. Self hate has apparently & overwhelmingly influenced her beliefs about African American culture. Actually, I find it incredulous that she, herself, believes what came out of her mouth. It had to be about garnering views and subscribers.

[@youmeandtherestofus]

She's just being honest. I know you guys don't like the truth. But until you're willing to confront it, there will be no change. Black America's biggest obstacle is not 'the system'. It's your culture or perhaps your lack of one. For context, hip-hop is a fad, it's not a sustainable way of life. Hence why your community is self-destructing.

[@verdaylove]

Nine minutes in. Loving the vibe and truly appreciative for this episode as I can telllll its a great conversation. I just must comment on the statement of African descendants/Indigenous Afro people in the USA not having any culture. Hear me out, sis

[@verdaylove]

ANTM**** not TS

[@verdaylove]

Anyway, subscribed

[@verdaylove]

And yes omg Afrobeats are sooooooo empowering and encouraging. Will make you KNOW YOUR WORTH and honor God OLUWA with our lives. Sis we can learn anything we put our minds too o

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Definitely appreciate your comment. I absolutely love the references and can relate but culture as a whole… meaning everyone can’t identify with Jerking or Tyra- yes iconic lol!! When I speak of culture I think of clothes, fabrics, foods, language… traditions... not just recreational events or entertainment. Other cultures have those things. That’s what I mean… I wish we had more depth to us other than Sexy Red… etc. I love being AA… I would love for us to showcase more respectful traditions. Again, thank you for the comment and the support! 💕✨

[@rebeccasmith1008]

I agree with @letstalkovercocktails much of the entertainment mentioned as being "culturally" African American is more recreational and not rooted in any traditional value. The only things I can think of that are structured and traditional are jumping the broom, sororities, some of our foods and HBCU's that's it. I think we have become extremely wayward and destructive as Americans to be honest.

[@orimidaraolusola569]

He's very right about AA women not welcoming the husband or even boyfriend's family. You're practically banned😢

[@JONAHOGAR-gl5ub]

being Wilde is not going to stop anytime soon because the culture isn't there to control some of this problem

[@user-li7gv2hv7k]

Victim of the stereotype is so true 😢😔praying for all the Native American people who are not wild panthers but instead indigenous people to this land🙏🏽 and for the African American people that were sold brought here from Africa I pray for you too and hope that one day together the native indigenous American Indian’s and the African American people one day come together to heal from the trauma of what our ancestors went through along with the suffering and that we overcome any obstacles that may come so that we can finally be happy again and not stereotyped to ourselves because it does not matter anymore what others think of us anymore, it matters what we think of ourselves and how well we do and overcome because as far as it’s kept it was the Africans who sold us off to the American pagan, ways. They sold there own african people to America this is why african American people today are wild so that makes the African indigenous people accountable as well for this, they are essentially considered wild panthers and are simply looking at themselves when they see african Americans the way they are today and tomorrow and so they are not looking at the world instead only themselves.

[@kandakemichelle]

💥 boom .

[@mankaudi7845]

Respect to you big brother. Iam proud of you. Iam Hausa 👍🏾👍🏾🇳🇬

[@ibinabos.amachree8762]

This sister/presenter is topnotch, i really like her alot. She is filled with positivity, happiness and fun.🎉

[@ashleybanksss]

Yas I like her. She’ll go far on her talk show

[@tonih4887]

The arrogance of it all. The fact that you were given the opportunity to come to America after Black Americans fought for Civil Rights. The Fair Immigration Act 1965 giving all non Europeans access to immigrate into this country. We fought for their right to be here and should not allow or put up with the disrespect. Black Americans do have a culture. Yes we have issues but there are issues in all cultures. The Nigerians who come here did not go through cattle slavery, Jim Crow and government institutional segregation and racist policies like Jim Crow, red lining etc. Let’s have more respect and honor for who we are and what we have gone through.

[@adenugaba]

My sister, you provided the free labor and we Africans provided the minerals and cash crops for free. Educate yourself, we are both victims. Don't fall into the trap of blaming each other while the culprits are walking free, like great benefactors.

[@avigrett1484]

Some of our parents were here before civil rights. Stop all these venom . My uncle was here in 1955 . Go get some education and stop all these arid remarks . Nnamdi Azikiwe was here in 1920 . Stop this craziness.

[@chazomoore]

What are you saying, did you think that we don't come to America before 1965 you guys fought for yourselves not for us ,my Uncle went to America to study before 1954 I wonder where you got your data from, my other uncle did his engineering studies in Sweden go do your research, you guys never fought for us take your angry self out , I married Africa American woman and is the best decision I ever made

[@sunnyyande378]

@tonih4887, what makes you think you are not arrogant? Did you in person fight for civil right? What makes you think you faught for others right to be in America? Grow up!

[@mariejane1567]

@@chazomoorehe couldn't come if it wasn't for us period. Pick a year fool.....

[@Because-v4x]

This discussion was mind blowing. I enjoyed learning how & why Nigerian men & women look at American men & women as they do. Knowledge is powerful. 🙂

[@letstalkovercocktails]

Thank you! I appreciate you watching! I learned a lot from this episode as well. 🫶🏽

[@Akpulosu]

Never ever spent time, ever, watching shows like this on KZbin or wherever, but this held me down all through. Nice and straight. Now following you….

[@marciajackson1390]

The host does not represent our American Black Culture. She is acting like she is only trying to impress the Nigeria or Africa Culture. Who chose this woman??

[@Sjbjo]

Behaviour wise she is far from being my cup of tea

[@oladaposarumi3219]

She is neutral, she is exposed, I guess you're ignorant for your criticism, do you listen to African Americans rappers? Both male and female? Google their lyrics

[@ramonataylor6246]

I agree, she does not know her culture. Letter to the host: Then would you say there is no black culture in the entire diaspora from the US to the Caribbean and Brazil? how did more African slaves end up in South America than the U.S? By way of slavery. Are they lost with no culture as well? You are not very educated, please please go back and learn. Each culture developed in the diaspora based on tradition from Africa and some of it that was lost and diffused with Spanish/French Catholic or English Protestant cultures. This new identity and culture is absolutely culture. From LA to Panama. Go study cultural anthropology. Okra, plantain, rice, fried foods, soul food, creole food, Southern cuisine is a part of every American restaurant today, Juneteenth celebrations (I’m a Texan), music born from our own communities now emulated all over the world, such as gospel, jazz, blues, country, rock, R&B, rap, historically black frats and sororities that are mostly generational and now have West African college student members, black inventors, debutante balls among the upper class Blacks,, the Harlem Renaissance which influenced literary movements and revolutionary movements worldwide from the 1920s to the 1960s, the Black church in itself had enough culture to circle the earth-from the large hats designed by black women to the linguistical oration of black preachers emulated by both White American and international preachers worldwide, to fashion trends, and even “slang” that becomes so popular, it changes the American English dictionary! The Geechie and Gullah cultures along the SE coast of the U.S. The creole cultures of Louisiana and distinct styles of dress and dance and Vodun rituals for ancestors derived from both Africa and converted Catholicism, and I, myself am a proud descendent of black farmers in Texas. Our Family reunion has been on held our land each summer for 70 years. I have my masters in history, because I love and admire ALL cultures. Everyone has a culture, including my Nigerian husband of 18 years! He has been so open to learning about Blacks’ past in America. I’m sorry YOU are not cultured, but at least you could’ve done some homework and understood this man is very limited in his exposure to AA if you were going to host a so called real conversation.

[@femoravans3520]

Im shocked to hear that anyone would think that a group of people have no culture. How is that even possible? I remember in my 7th grade social studies, we were taught that culture is the way of life of a group of people that is passed down from generations. Was I taught wrong?

[@letstalkovercocktails]

I also remember those things. For educational purposes, what is AA’s traditional culture? Please don’t mention entertainment or oppressed experiences in history. It’s not a bad thing… this is what I’m speaking of. I still love our entertainment and the strength we possess as people…

[@sweetjr25]

It's because she doesn't read any books and flunked history class.

[@jacklyneverage3881]

@@letstalkovercocktails That's for you to study and find out! You are that ignorant not to learn about the creole languages in our culture? You never heard of Hoodoo/rootworkers? And stop dismissing our soul food b/c it literally fed everybody both black and white. So, our inventions don't count either?! You sound ignorant as hell!

[@ramonataylor6246]

Sorry, not sure how this came up on my feed, but the host is so lost, I had to turn off of it. Black culture is the greatest “export” to the rest of the world. Ok, but you say, it’s only entertainment contributions. No ma’am, that’s just what the world, including Asian, African, and European artists and commercializing wants to take from us. That’s what’s trending or popular or can make them money-from gospel, to jazz. Blues, rock, country, R&B, hip hop, slang words, and fashion-those are what people see worldwide. But YOU, as an AA should know better, that until one comes to live here or takes time to read, they will only have our entertainment exports, which by the way, I’m proud of also. But we are so much more. We literally built the US, and much was our own style of architecture and farming methods, adopted from Africa and diffused with native and European cultures, our own DNA is a beautiful cultural story! You had an opportunity to school this polite man, but you did not. You are so misinformed! Even scholars have studied Black American culture, it’s called anthropology. Mac n cheese is not even a traditional dish until the last recent generations, but gumbo, johhny cakes, creole fish, and cornbread dressing are! Letter to this lost AA host: By way of slavery, Blacks from LA to Panama have adapted a unique culture across hundreds of years. You are not very educated, please please go back and learn, and study cultural anthropology. Each culture developed in the diaspora based on tradition from Africa and some of it that was lost and diffused with Spanish/French Catholic or English Protestant cultures. This new identity and culture is absolutely culture. From LA to Panama. Okra, plantain, rice, fried foods, red colored drinks , Juneteenth celebrations (I’m a Texan), music born from our own communities now emulated all over the world, such as gospel, jazz, blues, country, rock, R&B, rap, historically black frats and sororities that are mostly generational and now have West African college student members, black inventors, debutante balls among the upper class Blacks,, the Harlem Renaissance which influenced literary movements and revolutionary movements worldwide from the 1920s to the 1960s, the Black church in itself had enough culture to circle the earth-from the large hats designed by black women to the linguistical oration of black preachers emulated by both White American and international preachers worldwide, to fashion trends, and even “slang” that becomes so popular, it changes the American English dictionary! The Geechie and Gullah cultures along the SE coast of the U.S. The creole cultures of Louisiana and distinct styles of dress and dance and Vodun rituals for ancestors derived from both Africa and converted Catholicism, to gun shot style architecture of Louisiana, and I, myself am a proud descendent of black farmers in Texas. Our Family reunion has been on held our land each summer for 70 years. I have my masters in history, because I love and admire ALL cultures. Everyone has a culture, including my Nigerian husband of 18 years! He has been so open to learning about Blacks’ past in America. I’m sorry YOU are not cultured, but at least you could’ve done some homework and understood this man is very limited in his exposure to AA if you were going to host a so called real conversation.

[@ramonataylor6246]

So why didn’t you enlighten yourself? This is what our AA writers (known all over the world) complained about from the 1920s to the 1970s, they feared a generation that would not embrace and learn their own culture. It’s ok to not know, but to host a show and not even offer non entertainment contributions if Black Americans, sounds like you don’t even know as much as my Texan black farming uneducated uncle who still owns land my family purchased in the 1880s! They know more than you! With no college or podcasts. Please, sis, for your OWN sake, educate yourself. My husband is Nigerian, by the way.

[@akinakinsiku6818]

African Americans do have a culture. I think it is disapointing that this narrative exists. Its takes for granted that Black Culture is pretty much African American Culture.

[@Baddamozie]

This is the most intelligent conversation I've heard in recent times around the subject of Africa, African-American and Race in America. I am glad that you had a guest who is both educated and mature. I really love his interpretation of the word "Akata", which I as a Nigerian didn't even know. I'm not from one of the three major tribes from where most of the slangs come from. Growing up, I heard the word AKata, but it was attributed to the way our black brothers and sisters spoke. We attributed it to the loss of their native languages due to the effect of slavery. I never knew it was related to the Panther as an animal. I can see the raw connection between the untamed behavior of some of our cousins and that of an animal. Nevertheless, the lack of discipline in most Black households is a direct result of the immasculation of Black men by the slave masters. The slave masters enjoyed humiliating the men, black men in front of their wives. That practice had a humiliating on the psyche of black men, and I believe it triggered down over the years. That's going to take a long time to overcome. African Americans are also very hardworking by nature, but they stopped working as hard because of slavery, I don't blame them for that. With the new generation, I believe these shortcomings will be eradicated. I enjoyed this conversation a great deal. Good job, guys!

[@daughterofarevolutionary-s4376]

Americans do not have the strength to “Hear” the truth and instead resort to violence or name calling. Slavery still exists and the suffering continues, but Americans need to find a balance between being free to express themselves and resorting to violence against one another.

[@urbanq5377]

really? i get called names by more african men than american black men. african men don't like hearing the truth because they think they are better than everyone, they want to be right all the time and they feel like just because they african the can demand respect while they disrespect us.. Last time i checked respect goes both ways. don't demand something you can't give. Not that is the truth

[@beebee_0136]

Very intelligent conversation and shout-out to my naija brother for being balanced in his take. While not completely accurate, I must say I am very pleased, something that's rare these days especially when Nigerian diasporas come on panels like this. But he has managed to present all groups in a very good light which is something we need for both communities to thrive in peace and harmony.

[@BrittneyCaldwell]

African-American woman. My hsuband married me. Not for a green card. We are both the same age. Life has been well for us.

[@erikainiguez1314]

I appreciate his transparency and the raw confidence that brings a certain type of attraction that likely attracts that soft woman indeed and that's beautiful. I am engaged to an African man (DRC). I feel he has an African ego and judgemental side but an African American insecurity or entitlement or laziness maybe (?). Or maybe he's a narcissist. So I say that because initially he did all the swooning. I told him that I don't need a man to pay my bills or dinners but I had discovered that I find it incredibly sexy when a man takes that lead and finds it disrespectful when women offer. I should note that I am Mexican so yes, our men also take grate pride and honor in being providers while women take great honor in taking care of his needs as well as the kids and house and we like pleasing and serving our men above anyone. So it is innate in me even when I try to act as if I didn't like that due to environmental circumstances and pressures. I love being soft and taken care of, it's me no denying it. So I let him know this and he said he loved that and did all he could within his means to show me a good time. We ended up living together and then he bought a house of which we share bills and we got engaged. He says he is all about family and my ovaries vibrated when he said that because I wanted to give him kids almost instantly. But it turns out it's only HIS family that matters. Not mine. Not creating one of his own. This is where what Nosh said resonates and makes me seek within myself. I see this in a lot of African men. Do men have a genuine respect for women as equal partners as in we both have a role to fill to accomplish what is needed for our household and family or is his mother always going to be queen and dictate everything he does and take his money? Am I just a role player and baby producer? Because a man who cannot put a healthy but lax boundary on his initial family is unattractive to me because what that tells me is that I am not your queen, your mother is and my ovaries don't want to produce children for a man that sees me as third it brings great insecurity. In the Mexican culture a man leaves his mother and father to walk with his wife and she becomes his queen the mother and father are there for support but dictate nothing in our marriage because a man should already know his responsibility is to his wife and kids and providing for them and more importantly to honorably represent your family’s last name. So when Nosh said women don't like family visiting, it's not that I don't like it because I love seeing him around his family, it's that they tell us last minute and we both work and have responsibilities and can't drop everything to pick them up at the airport and prep our house and schedule so it brings some pressure as a woman because they do judge instead of understanding or being empathetic or at least giving us a heads up. Now with that being said this wouldn't be an issue if he actually treated me better and gave me more financial and emotional support because now it's if I need tires or car repair or can't at the moment afford a ticket out of the country to join him and his daughter on a trip or I have a medical bill he will not provide that. I didn't have the financial security because I had just made a large purchase for our home so I wanted to save a bit. I asked him to wait so I can save but he said no and didn't offer to pay and he has the money. But then pays for his mom to go. Is that normal? To place your mother and family above your wife?? That's very anti-Christian. His parents are always right and I have to shut up and take it even when there's actual video proof that they are lying. I should also let them run the house but then if I don't provide help or support then I'm lazy and unwelcoming but when I do then I'm controlling and they feel like they aren't wanted there. Should he not set boundaries for both myself and his family? He has never been able to tell his family no and to me that's very unattractive and not masculine and weak. I love cooking and I clean and I do all the things most men want from women so I'm confident it's not that as I've also confirmed with him. So does the African (Nigerian) have the same push to be his wife's financial, emotional and structural support as he has for his drive? Because I can tell you right now if a man is treating me respect, validates me, sees me as his partner, prioritizes my needs, makes me feel secure in every way then honey yes please lead me and tell me what to do. But I cannot give you my body and mind and dignity if you run to mommy for every bump in the road so that she can stroke your ego for an exchange of money. It's quite disturbing tbh. You never treat them like you mistreated me, they don't sleep with you, they don't wash your clothes, cook, be a mother to your daughter, they don't work but I'm supposed to shut up and take it? It's an honest question. Loved your insight. You guys are both beautiful.