Why God Allows Toxic Relationships: 5 Ways He Uses Them for Your Good

[@PridelessChickz]

Dealing with countless painful relationships has grown my discernment unlike anything else. Now I'm about to marry a Prince who treats me like the Princess that I am😇

[@ShaneenMegji]

I'm so happy to hear that! Praise God!

[@OurHighPriest]

AMEN sister 🤍🤍🤍

[@georgeteo8797]

I am a prince and married a princess… My biggest mistake was that I didn’t have a butler… so soon after the honeymoon I became the butler! It’s been 35 long years with a demanding princess who used intimacy to get what she wanted! I would trade the millions for a shack in the woods with someone who really loves me… but it’s too late, unless time can be turned back…

[@wilrivera9453]

So happy for you.. congratulations

[@rosierb852]

Amen!!!! Yes countless for me as well! I know the last relationship I was in will be my last with a narcissist evil person. I can’t wait for God to shape me a bit more so I can met my Godly prince

[@andreabill7719]

I love that no matter what happened Joseph did not see himself as a victim. Because he didn't see himself this way, he wasn't a victim.

[@kittiemartha2079]

And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten...Joel 2:25

[@mtc-j9i]

Amen 🙏🏽 ❤ year after year of wasted investment in people I loved but didn’t love me. It was a waste. I am believing God for restoration.

[@FaithWorksHealing-z3p]

Amen! I can attest to that-God healed me, and now I help other Christians heal as well. “Don’t be afraid; just believe.” - Mark 5:36

[@aaronkwolfe]

I got kicked out of my home by toxic (now ex) spouse. I ended up right across the street from a church I’d likely never visit. I was about done with “churchianity,” but the cheerful greeter made me willing to try just 1 visit. I’m still there, 9 years later, with a whole church family, a mens’ ministry, and tons of peace.

[@aaronkwolfe]

I was, at first, strategizing the legal route, but their Divorce Care and many sermons, got me to going the Biblical route.

[@petrahorakova2525]

Hello. May I ask what content does such a Divorce Ministry offer?? I've never heard of it, as I'm from an 'undeveloped part of the church' in this respect. Thank you so much for your answer. Blessings from Europe🙌🏻

[@aaronkwolfe]

@@petrahorakova2525 We used curriculum from Divorce Care dot ORGinization. It changed my thinking.

[@FaithWorksHealing-z3p]

Happy for you brother

[@richardbensinger6922]

No matter how devastating it may be now. It's where healing starts. He can and will use this for good.

[@hestercastlemansa2976]

It was very tough but I'm starting to see the light. A lot was revealed. What a painful journey.

[@foxygayla]

It's definitely a very hard and painful journey. Totally agree. ❤

[@naowright9308]

This is exactly what God has done for me. I was a massive people pleaser and there a few people whose opinion mattered more than anyone. I held their opinions as the opinions of God. I now don't give a rip what they think. I am willing and have called them out on their bad behavior. They have tried to put me down and smear me, but it has made me more independent. Everything is changing. The light has illuminated the end of the tunnel.

[@alicethomas6645]

This is soooo very much TRUE...I'm a living witness. God is good and faithful❤

[@janeylynn5934]

Due to chronic health issues, I've been stuck living with my narc parents my entire adult life. No financial resources means no way out. I've spent years and years praying for freedom, and God has never answered any of my prayers. This isn't just a "difficult season," this is an entire lifetime.

[@Garden366]

❤

[@Sunshine-Rainbows]

I’m sorry you are going through this. When you’re in it, it can seem like a lifetime of nothing but suffering. I suffered for 17 years under a narc mother (absent father). Then married one, it’s all I’ve known. I started praying almost immediately after getting married about our marriage and how I was being abused. Suffered with him for 17 years before God finally called me out of it. I was desperately seeking God at the end because I was suffering in a toxic workplace and coworkers and it was coming at me from work and home. I heard very clearly God was telling me to step out and leave the relationship with him over a period of a year and a half. It took me so long because I’m like surely God would not be telling me this. But he lovingly pursued me and was persistent in this. I made a plan to escape and eventually my husband finally admitted everything he was doing and had done, and it was way more than I could have even fathomed. We are now separated. Life is still a struggle doing it all and having no job, but my girls and I live in peace now and it is so worth it! God heard me, he still does, and God hears you too!

[@MushrafatOladimeji]

God will liberate you 😢

[@aleciawimer8506]

You have to get to the third stage of prayer: 1. Take this cup from me. 2. Not my will but thine be done. 3. Mine hour has come (acceptance). Jesus showed this in the garden. The third stage is @acceptance,” which is a cease from struggling, agonizing, etc… God moves when we accept His will as a calm, settled, trusting, weaned child. Godliness with contentment is great gain. Seek to be satisfied in where God has you now. Look for the silver lining. We have to trust in His perfect timing and enjoy good days now. God waits on us to have the right spiritual mindset, very often.

[@janeylynn5934]

@@aleciawimer8506 I have spent many hours in prayer, and have tried many times to not think about the abuse, and just try to focus on God. But it's almost impossible to not be affected in some way by being treated every day like I'm not good enough. It just does affect me, as hard as I try not to let it. I'm not sure what I can do about that. (And I certainly can't afford therapy.)

[@rosierb852]

I agree. During my relationship with my ex, once I turned away from the relationship, and focused on my relationship with God, my healing was when I noticed that I had to heal a lot of damage, purge a lot of stuff from my soul that was weighing down my spirit. I went to therapy for childhood stuff and my relationship with God became stronger than ever. That was when God led me out of that. I walked away from the darkness and found my way back to the light. I was lost in darkness, but now I’m found. I’m never going back there. I have been free since March 2024 nearly 8mths. Now when I encounter such people I walk away and flee. It’s not that I’m afraid, it’s that I don’t want to be in the company of those who choose the side of Satan. These people will destroy your soul and your spirit takes a beating as well. I worked hard to get where I am spiritually. I’m not being dragged back into darkness.

[@SallieGarmoe]

Amen ❤ this!

[@jenelleeckel5799]

God uses circumstances for teaching and growing us, but He does not set us up! We set ourselves up or we are put into difficult relationships. But, it is our responsibility to heal from it and hopefully learn a few things.

[@1legend517]

Really?? He does not set us up? I've been set up like this since birth. And he has no plan for me.

[@petrahorakova2525]

​​@@1legend517 no plan...? What if he's with you through all of that? It helps sometimes to see God less from the perspective of a tiny worm (so the Omnipotent One), but rather as a pilgrim who's accompanied (and guided) by a wise friend. Immanuel - God with us, that is feeling all as we do .. This helped me a lot.

[@petrahorakova2525]

The banger song "What if God was one of us...?" just came to my mind.

[@1legend517]

@@petrahorakova2525 I don't think he is, honestly. If he was with me, he wouldn't trap me and let me suffer like this. The fact is he just doesn't care.

[@andreabill7719]

We live in a fallen world....

[@KatI422-r3m]

I do believe that God can use all things for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes. If something we do or perhaps a situation where we may had been warned of prior to, we can learn obedience through things we may suffer. So when we see those "red flags" again, and we will, we are more self aware to deploy and stand in strong boundaries. Therapy and counseling are always a plus in staying aware of our emotional state and any blind spots so as to not be ensnared into toxic relationships.

[@jenicarter4190]

Great comment

[@oliviasalas5420]

Thank you, this message has reminded me to stay focused on what God is doing in my life🙏

[@ressaholland1916]

My whole childhood was like this (did not know it then). Then an abusive husband. Then a controlling roommate. Then on my own. Then I had to move back with my narc grandmother, then married a narc husband. If you do not believe in divorce (like so many others did as Christians, married to narc spouses), it does seem like a very long season.

[@lisax23]

I don't believe Jesus wants us to stay in abusive relationship

[@TheBlondiekitten]

Thank you so much 💪🥰🤩 You are a blessing from God/ Jehovah/ Yahweh ❤❤❤

[@Rixster53]

In Christ Alone, my hope is found, he is my strength, my life, my ALL! When I have wrestled with the Lord about my toxic spouse he answered me, suffer it to be so for now child, “my grace is sufficient” for thee! Not necessarily the answer I was looking for but, he is always right! I’m stronger for it…😇

[@vester7457]

This lady is one of the best presenters on KZbin. She combines genuine understanding of the proudly insolent with how to overcome by Christian faith

[@johannaeriksson9458]

In all the confusion and sadness, your videos feel like a warm hug. You are a light in the darkness 🤍

[@rickyrobertson1851]

Thank you for this eye opening message. You hit me right where I am. Thank you! Stay Blessed!

[@susancinek5803]

I allowed it, God watched over me and when I was torn and absolutely at the end, I reached out, grabbed His hand and He extricated me. I took time to heal, many ups and downs. Thank you Shaneen for your help!

[@nz630]

I have learned that when you are in situations you can't solve on your own strength and abilities, you are forced to rely 100% on God, pray and be closer to Him. So, it is an opportunity to develop a stronger faith.

[@LBOMendoza]

This video brought me so much comfort and a great reminder of what God has been telling me. How easily we forget. Oftentimes, God has to keep reminding me... just another reminder of how much I need HIM! ❤❤❤

[@Caroline-m8f]

Thank you for this. God bless you always in Jesus name Amen

[@aleciawimer8506]

I had to have an emergency surgery 2 weeks ago. I’ve been running a fever everyday for the past 3 weeks, and it’s been really hard. This is on top of other difficult situations. I welcome your prayers. I’m a mother of six.

[@orjadagjoka583]

I pray for you and your kids to remain faithful. God will show you mercy and recover your body. Blessings 🙌 upon you.

[@terridillon3053]

🙏🏼🦋

[@thechubbyhiker4142]

Thank you so much for the freeby!!! I’ll look forward to reading that!! I have a toxic mother and a toxic husband. Slowly learning boundaries and soon filing for divorce. God has strengthened me beyond my expectations. I’m so blessed and grateful. God has also shown me my own toxic traits and am working on that too!! God is truly a treasure. THE treasure! Thanks again and many blessings to you!

[@wesmeyer4491]

Bless you for standing against the enemies attacks...God Bless!

[@miketindol1679]

A perspective I didn’t enjoy but, I appreciate it because I believe you’re right. I would rather see the toxic person healed than to think of using them to make me work on me.

[@BrideofChrist11]

This was TRULY Wisdom of God!!! It really ministered to me .... ~~ thank you 🙌🔥🔥🔥🎯🧡

[@aleciawimer8506]

The last 4 years have been “a time to loose” from Ecclesiastes 3. The losses are piling up, but trusting in God.

[@laura.danisi8590]

This was excellent 👑

[@ES-nr2ew]

Oh my gosh i am BLESSED beyond words to find this channel! Praising God for you right now ! Thank you ! Thank God !

[@ehallam08]

You got in my head and picked exactly everything. Outstanding

[@ShaneenMegji]

Praise God! I'm so glad to hear that.

[@enojelmeli]

Thank you for the reminder that we need to hold on to the vision God has given even when circumstances don't match up to what God has spoken. No one can stop God's plan for our lives. Blessings on your ministry. You are helping us to heal. ❤

[@ChristopherARLANDOO]

Hi lovely shaneen thanks for another video amen jesus 🙏

[@LighthouseNAnchor]

Awesome message…thank you!❤

[@heidikelly3201]

Thank you so much for the 100 Biblical Declarations!! I love your love for our Lord! You are an inspiration to me!!❤❤

[@robertmcgirr401]

Thank you. I'll dwell on this. May help answer questions, emotions.

[@SallieGarmoe]

Amen, Amen, Amen! Confirmation after confirmation, thank you so much!

[@MonikaBlock-o7g]

Thank you so much Shaneen for your insight and wisdom! I needed this so much right now!!!

[@ShaneenMegji]

I'm so glad it was helpful. God bless you Monika!

[@herzaugenblicke]

This is so good to hear! You are right, thank you! ❤

[@moniqueberrian5880]

This was such a great video. And it has definitely been a learning experience for me. The things my family and I have experienced are helping us in our organization 🙌🏾. Although it’s been painful, it is needed. I Praise God for being such a loving and amazing father🙌🏾🙌🏾❤❤. Thank you again

[@florakhoza7447]

Thank you Dear ❤❤❤

[@sheryl7638]

Excellent!! Thank you!! ❤🙏

[@MeCynthiaAnn]

You are SO PRECIOUS dear! Thanks for the videos. Hugs from Cynthia Ann in JANESVILLE, WISCONSIN USA

[@user-ys4gz6oh2vDan]

God bless Shaneen

[@susan6390]

I am in a toxic relationship. I don't know how I entered it and it lasted so long. I have been praying for help. I actually prayed for a Godly relationship before I met him and that is what bothers me. I thought i was close to God? Maybe I wasn't enough

[@andreabill7719]

Sometimes we can be deceived. The same thing happened to me and it messed with me, but I decided to keep seeking God and to try to learn how to discern the spirits better and I keep trying. People can be deceitful and the enemy can work through them. 😢

[@rosemondamponsah8243]

Very true

[@LuckyToucan-xs6ru]

God doesn't give you what, he gives you what he thinks you need.....

[@syebethel]

I'm listening, but not experiencing any of this. My many decades on this earth have been filled with toxicity, from mother, siblings, colleagues, boyfriends. So much so, that I'm only willing to have relationships with ppl who are not those, so you can say I'm a recluse in a big city! At first, my life seemed a Joseph story, but it's def not turning out that way. I've struggled all my life but a few years, and currently barely getting by but with more debt than ever. Abuse in every form from romantic relationships. I cd go on & on, but I'm not one about the excuses, only truth. At this point in life, I feel I'll just coast until i die.

[@andreabill7719]

Praying for you. Keep Hope. It is never too late. You are here for a reason.

[@leonenel219]

Thank you

[@juliepora3875]

Thank you for this.

[@bvon5630]

Thx Shaneen.

[@annbehenna2027]

Great video and message.

[@rockkstah2550]

Welcome to the fallen nature, it’s not that we’re sinners, but we are SIN. It’s why we do sinful acts. It is why we must be born again of a whole different nature from GOD JESUS. And remain in it, at the same time constantly crucifying the old nature…

[@davidminnis7158]

Thank you!

[@1legend517]

I am so screwed up beyond belief. At this point I think if I had access to it, I'd need assisted living, assisted care, assisted employment, assisted everything. My life is so messed up both due to my father and my own destructive doing with the mistakes ive made. I have the constant thoughts in the back of my mind like "how can i start doing anything with my life at this age or older?" "who the hell is going to want to know me?" "am I going to be like this for the rest of my life?". I am left trying to navigate this world like Mr. Bean. The best way I can describe it is if you can keep an animal in a cage for its whole life and then you try to release it into the wild, it won't be able to survive. Because it doesn't know how to hunt, navigate its surroundings, socialise with others of its kind, find a mate, find food, shelter or water etc. This is exactly what I'm going through. I feel an animal that's been kept in a cage its whole life and I don't know how to function in the outside world. It's terrible. I see people with normal lives, normal upbringings, and the joys and successes they have in life and I feel so sad and jealous that they get to have that and I don't. And I'm constantly wondering why am I so cursed in life that I have to suffer? What did I do so wrong to deserve a life like this? If theres a God up there, he's got a lot to answer for!

[@7me100]

Timely 😊

[@ltl9009]

Having toxic narcissists in my immediate family wasn't fun.

[@BarbaraLinton-k1c]

I recently went through a tough breakup. My 7 year relationship ended a month ago, and it's been really hard for me. I still love my ex so much and can't stop thinking about him. I've tried everything to win him back, but nothing has worked. It's frustrating, and I can't imagine being with anyone else. I've been trying to move on, but I can't seem to get him out of my mind. I know it might sound strange to share this here, but I miss him a lot and just can't stop thinking about him.

[@ChristineCole-u3f]

I understand the pain of letting go of someone you love. I went through a similar situation when my 12 year relationship ended. I couldn't just let him go, so I did everything I could to win him back. I sought the help of a spiritual counselor, and their guidance ultimately helped me to bring him back into my life.

[@BarbaraLinton-k1c]

Amazing! How did you find a spiritual counselor, and how can I contact them?

[@ChristineCole-u3f]

His name is Fatherabulu, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can help restore your relationship with your ex.

[@BarbaraLinton-k1c]

Thanks for sharing this valuable information. I just looked him up online and I'm impressed.

[@richellepeace4457]

Its always about boot camp for the head count at the dinner...Why doesn't anyone address the fact that HE chose what womb and situation that starts the whole mess. Jacob, Joseph, etc. People that jump to affiliate are also the ones who crave affiliation. Comes down to what your knit for. You must like yours....

[@IamHisHeismine]

What if God doesn’t fill your deepest needs when you desperately needed him to?? I’m starting to think maybe God just gives up on some people and doesn’t really care about everyone.

[@betterimagephoto]

The assembly of god pastor covered up his nephews sexual harassment, blame shifted, then prayed over me. I can't listen to prayer without hearing this pastors voice. Where is the church to call this man out as a wolf. The central office said because I never signed a membership form, I am not a brother. This is evil protecting evil.

[@joekingsbury9595]

Thank you for all you do Shaneen. I was wondering if you belong to a specific religion? I was raised Catholic but stopped going by age 14. Nowadays I mostly read the Bible alone, but when the need to be around like minded people I usually go hang out at the local Kingdom Hall (JW). I'm not a sworn member but they are always so welcoming and kind, it's like you can feel the Holy Spirit in the air, I love it. I keep my hair long, have a rocker dude type appearance which they hassle me about sometimes, lol. I tell them to read Numbers 6:5......

[@petrahorakova2525]

😅 well, I wouldn't expect Holy Spirit enjoying JW meetings in general. It's good you feel welcomed and accepted, but... many ppl testify about being under spirit of law(deeds) and strong control ... Pls pray about it. It may be a love bombing strategy, you know. Many witness it a toxic system. Please, be careful.

[@joekingsbury9595]

@@petrahorakova2525 I'm not a sworn member. Long hair is not allowed, please pay attention next time. The most important thing to me about them is that they stick to the BIBLE. And that's why I go there. I work with all kinds of negative people; atheists, witches, agnostics, addicts, homosexuals, the list goes on. Going to the Kingdom Hall is like a breath of fresh air for me. I NEED to talk with people who believe in God... AND read that Good Book

[@petrahorakova2525]

@@joekingsbury9595 they explain bible in s very fundamental way, see e.g. their 'blood' stuff. Crazy, indeed! You shall be warned. Love gives more freedom and grace than that. Let the Spirit guide you.

[@joekingsbury9595]

@@petrahorakova2525 I always do. And no better way to do that than read the Bible

[@monika44k78]

Im constantly abuse from diffrent people for 38 Yeats ody live i have s- e t-s i dont wany that live i starter to lose heath

[@justman4891]

For a person who is close with god, toxic relationships are like steroids for the soul. Ive been in these kind of relationships all my life

[@wookieiam1]

Oh no, no ,no, it's not part of Gods plan to get into toxic relationships like marriage. We are supposed to obey when the word says do not be 😮 unequally yoked. When we get married, we are supposed to be circumspect . In this country, most marriages are not prearranged. There is a personal choice that gives options to be carefully considered. God doesn't set the plan to be abused so that somehow we learn a life lesson or get special dispensation. That's nuts.

[@abbasjoy4785]

It's not the plan, but what happens when we do make the mistake? God is still good and able to work all things for good.

[@markb3786]

God allows the horrible suffering of billions of creatures on Earth every day

[@TruthandJustice-hz9nv]

Thank you so much for this Shannen, Absolutely tremendous, I know what god is telling me, Peace, love and respect to you and everyone, Thank you universe, All glory praise and smiles to the most high :-)

[@wittymystic7361]

So, you believe in reincarnation? This must be true. Otherwise, past wounds could not exist if the relationship God wants to heal is parental. For me, that's where the wounds began.

[@bansheesioux5569]

Because he doesn't exist. For a supreme being he's pretty weak and petty. Like a human

[@pierre931]

what interest to this selfish of god to distroy the bad? in anycase is not he that suffer and die.there is he and only he.his is not love, is selfishness

[@bansheesioux5569]

More pretend, religious,less than even pseudo logic. Also known as lies.