Why Narcissists Always Come Back: The Truth About Hoovering

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If you're a woman feeling trapped in a toxic relationship and looking for freedom, you've come to the right place. With over 3000+ clients, I've integrated everything I've learned into a comprehensive program designed to help you reclaim your freedom. My goal is to guide you to break free without confronting or trying to fix him. Together, let's rediscover YOU and cultivate your confidence and clarity. To take the next step in your healing journey with me, visit www.rawmotivat...
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If you're a man struggling with narcissistic traits and seeking the path, community, and transformation that I've experienced, I'm here to help - but only if you are serious about investing the time and energy. To begin this journey with me, schedule a session at www.rawmotivat...
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Tune in to hear the perspective of a self-aware narcissist. That’s me - Ben Taylor, a narcissist in recovery trying to promote awareness, healing, growth, and change. I do that through these videos on here, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook.
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[@Hikerboy92]

“Hoovering = Control not care” It is deeply saddening to know these people play on your heart and don’t possess an ounce of true care for you. That was the hardest pill for me to swallow. Once I did, it empowered me to move on with my life and never look back!

[@RawMotivations]

Hi there, have you thought about the next steps you should take in your healing journey? I would like to invite you to be a part of this free masterclass discover how to break free from toxic relationships and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..

[@Truth-matters-v2z]

Can you address that hoovering isn’t always a blatant asking to come back, get another chance together etc. Sometimes the Hoover is testing the water

[@mightymom1691]

Ben, ANOTHER “spot on” incredible video of God-given wisdom and truth! Every time I start thinking incorrectly, you are here. Forever grateful and appreciative.

[@RawMotivations]

Wow, thank you!

[@1111spiritualone]

I’m lucky, over 2 years and mine never tried coming back because I went no contact and they’re too scared and know they would get rejected. They tried two reverse Hoovers and I ignored them. They’re use to being chased because of how they leave and monkey branch.

[@Wuestenwiesel]

Like dog shit under your shoe hard to get rid off

[@heathermcdonald233]

Ben is 100% accurate!!! Just went through everything he described. ( 2 years after divorce) Luckily because of Ben and working with him I saw the things I needed to see. Crawling back out of the hole now but so thankful for you Ben!!!

[@RawMotivations]

Hi there, have you thought about the next steps you should take in your healing journey? I would like to invite you to be a part of this free masterclass discover how to break free from toxic relationships and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..

[@comfortzone5618]

The narc is trying to get me to reverse hoover. He sent me two random Twitter links. I ignored it! Haven’t heard anything since.

[@dougedoug2105]

Narcs are empty vessels, They only come back if they believe they’ll get more supply. The replacement supply for my now ex was the old previously discarded supply I replaced. My ex tried to hoover me post breakup but it was only temporary. How? Because I told my ex during the love bombing phase shortly after the narcissistic traits emerged, that “I don’t do exes” meaning I do not maintain contact with my partners after a relationship ends. This puzzled my ex because it’s unusual. The replacement supply thinks he’s got one up on me because he participated in my discard as a revenge tactic. But I know something else and that something else is that: He’s only back in the picture because he has no self respect. You can tolerate the disrespect, but I, myself, however, I will not. I think I’m the one who actually won in that game. My ex already knows that coming back isn’t an option because I shut that shit down from the very beginning. Hence my comment’s very first sentence: Narcs don’t always come back 😂😂😂😂

[@snarkysunshine]

He is hoovering me in another level of spiritual manipulation.. It turns out that all this time I was being energetically hoovered.. I though him as a twinflame.. After separation, he hoovered me.. Because empaths feel energy.. I thought it was twinflame energy.. Moreover, he used the tactic of inaction.. So I became more convinced that he was a twinflame runner.. Inaction is an action that chooses not to act.. To manipulate me to become anxious, feel a high sense of curiosity towards him, his lack of clarity made me feel like butterflies in my stomach, feel mystery of him, nervous but also excited.. I have known him for 8 years and I realized myself observing what was happening in me and him I'm this two years.. I was in so much grieving, unused my empathy and doing hermit mode for 2 years.. And understood what manipulative tactics he did to me.. He can't hoovering me again for this 2 years.. He stalking me with many fake account.. People who being manipulate are people who low self aware.. I aware anough and build energy protection from spiritual manipulation..

[@avisboris1634]

Mine came back after 24 years

[@williampadin537]

¿is thad true 24 year ? Tell me you story Please

[@avisboris1634]

​@@williampadin537 It's a very long story lol

[@williampadin537]

@@avisboris1634 you went back ¿?

[@simonadobre7100]

Really?

[@avisboris1634]

Yes, I went back, but not intentionally at first. He contacted me after 25 years to ask forgiveness.. I felt like I was safe in talking with him because I had moved 3 states away from him when he left. So I thought I could control the situation better over the internet. Unfortunately I got very sick and was alone, my daughter called him and asked if it was possible for him to get to me and help me. He did...

[@Bonniebella1111]

I’m in the middle of a divorce, idk how my wife got my new number. She refused to sign. She texted me today asking about my son. She weird asf. But left me for NS 🤷🏾‍♀️ I don’t respond anymore

[@Hikerboy92]

I understand your frustration, it took me a year and a half to finally get my narc spouse to sign. I’m sending love and strength your way. ❤

[@ladyvirgo013]

I'm currently 14 plus months into the divorce, God help me

[@RawMotivations]

Hi there, have you thought about the next steps you should take in your healing journey? I would like to invite you to be a part of this free masterclass discover how to break free from toxic relationships and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..

[@drexelhamilton1097]

The narcissist I dealt with is gone for good. She has moved out, blocked me on Facebook, is in a relationship with a married man who has kids, and seems to be gaslighting other forms of supply. The only thing that I have to do with her, I pay her rent bc she lets me and my dogs to stay in her house. That is it. We do also work at the same restaurant, but I am trying to minimize the amount of times I have to see her. I believe she is done with me as I am done with her. Plus, I'm not primary or even supply. So, her return is not going to happen.

[@sun.kissed.3]

She still has a form of control because of the fact you stay in her house and work in the same restaurant when the marriage fails she will be back so please be careful

[@drexelhamilton1097]

@@sun.kissed.3 I will, but it's frustrating that no matter how I look at the situation, it always boils down to, "she'll be back." There's always going to be a disturbance in the Force.

[@sun.kissed.3]

@@drexelhamilton1097 I know it’s very difficult but they never truly discard the only one who can truly discard is you as they will always need and miss the supply you provided when they run low on options they are energy vampires

[@peachmelba1637]

Mine recently texted me at 3.30am after THIRTEEN YEARS....He dumped me by text after three and a half years.... Left in the middle of the night for someone from a dating site... Never ever want to see this evil violent entity again... ignored, deleted, blocked..

[@YakobLTW]

Mine got her new supply to fly her out to live in a different country with him and will marry later this year. I was hurt, not about the marriage. But it felt like I wasn't healing as fast as she was moving on. But to realize how far I have actually come since, mentally, physically, spiritually and even financially. Night and day. I remind myself I can't compare myself to someone who will live in any house to someone who is building their own. The idea of a hoover still scares me. I fear it less knowing she isn't even in the same country. But still fear it could happen.

[@janicebegley4192]

To your knowledge Has anyone had a successful lawsuit against one o these NPDs?? 3x in 6 years he’s devalued/discarded and flaunted new supplies. I’ve paid 1000s in therapy I want him to pay!

[@RawMotivations]

Right now, the main person paying is just you. Why don’t we get you fully healed versus looking for him to pay and you still not healing? Https://www.rawmotivations.com/survivor

[@fokker34]

Trauma bonded here. Got with the girl of my dreams, so I thought. 2 months of bliss, followed by 4 months of hell and confusion. Trying to move on, two months of gray rocking now, it's not easy for me. I have to get a few things from her somehow without falling into the hoover, again. That last time she sucked me back was only to try dumping her new dog onto me then she was gonna bail, I saw that coming.

[@NatzTalk]

Yeah I ghosted his ass literally he thought I was dumb enough to stay after he betrayed me with cheating. I've never tolerated cheating so I let him think I was gonna stay but I ghosted him- a month to the day of me ghosting him, he calls ofc I didn't answer. Then 3 months later 4th of July he texts me AND he texted my daughter to make sure I got his msg!😂🙄

[@comfortzone5618]

I was dumb too to forgive him after cheating. I feel so foolish! 😢

[@rhondawampner688]

How do you stay away from a toxic person, when they live in the same apartment complex I do

[@ericmurphy6266]

Then you move & block the individual on everthing

[@rhondawampner688]

@@ericmurphy6266 I'm on a fixed income. I don't have the money to move

[@rhondawampner688]

@@ericmurphy6266 I'm on a fixed income, I can't afford to move

[@rhondawampner688]

What's wrong with me? For some reason I draw toxic people in my life

[@RawMotivations]

Hi there, have you thought about the next steps you should take in your healing journey? I would like to invite you to be a part of this free masterclass discover how to break free from toxic relationships and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..

[@izzar1156]

I ve got exactly the same problem. Always atracted to narcissists!ones I realise then im not getting into the relationship but next guy im atracted to he is another narcissist. 20 years. Im still single😮

[@manzanitaverde5455]

This might be a silly question but I wonder why he never hit me,(just pushed) but he did hit one of the girls after me...I can't believe that's what he does now.

[@jeskahaley9616]

But how do we heal and become emotionally strong? How do we stop loving them? When you know the looming truth is that they don’t really love you even though they tell you and it’s very very believable and you think maybe they do love me but they have this mental block because they’re a narcissist and they don’t know how to handle it and can never have a healthy relationship maybe deep in their heart they do love me? Don’t want to judge somebody’s heart so hard that I wrongly assume that they’re incapable of love if I believe that they love me and I never give them another chance with me is that still wrong? How do you worry for someone’s heart so much if they don’t really have a heart? If you were able to become self-aware doesn’t have a heart? I struggle to know if there’s ever hope for they ever love or maybe they loved me and I ruined it or they ruined it

[@jeskahaley9616]

Why do they always come back though? Is it because they know that we’re kind enough to answer? I seriously just wish that he would just admit to me that he doesn’t love me, but it hurts because I think that he does but his mental problem is that he is a narcissist and even though he loves me, he can never have a healthy relationship with me and that’s why he keeps coming back because he does love me, but I also feel like that’s wrong and completely delusional. He’s an emotionless human, which is obviously not true I know that you guys still experience emotion at the end of the day narcissist always leave us completely confused. I just pray for him to become self-aware. That’s all I want even if I never get to see it even if he never talk to me again, I just want him to be self-aware. I want him to know Jesus that’s all I want. I would love it. It wouldn’t hurt me to think that he never will know Jesus because that hurts me more than anything. He’s ever done to me.

[@jeskahaley9616]

I have another question, since you’re a self-aware narcissist, you mentioned that you wanted to do whatever you wanted and that’s why you wanted your wife to leave… But if you truly wanted her back all these times why? Because if your wife would just leave and stay gone you could do it whatever you wanted right? So what I don’t understand is even though you were a sick narcissist and had some mental issues that made it hard for you to love properly. Did you still love her? Do you love her now? Or do you just think that you are healthier and better off with her and not cheating on her? Or do you actually love her? I struggle, wondering if narcissist are capable of love because if they’re not, that means they’re a psychopath which makes me think that there’s pretty much no hope for them to know the Lord, although there is the truth that the Lord can change any heart if he wants to, and they will open up at all, but who knows if that’s even possible. Sorry for so many words maybe you’ll never see this, but it’s confusing to me and I guess that’s the whole style of narcissist is to confuse normal people. But it is confusing. It makes me think that narcissist are capable of love. They just can’t do it properly and are very selfish.

[@caroleminke6116]

My parents had a 7 year long divorce from hell after 30 years of awful matrimony & my father sent the divorce papers on their anniversary ❤️‍🩹 my mother remarried three years later to a decent person whose partner had died & his daughter was in my class… they lived up the road from my father who had kept the home. Guess who started showing up there? One day I went by with some garden vegetables & his car was in their driveway. My blood ran cold! When I asked my mother why she let him come in, she actually said that they might have made it together 🤦‍♀️ I simply told her that I also was there & she was mistaken. Eventually I went no contact with both parents before they died & wish I had done it earlier

[@jeskahaley9616]

But how do we heal and become emotionally strong? How do we stop loving them? When you know the looming truth is that they don’t really love you even though they tell you and it’s very very believable and you think maybe they do love me but they have this mental block because they’re a narcissist and they don’t know how to handle it and can never have a healthy relationship maybe deep in their heart they do love me? Don’t want to judge somebody’s heart so hard that I wrongly assume that they’re incapable of love if I believe that they love me and I never give them another chance with me is that still wrong? How do you worry for someone’s heart so much if they don’t really have a heart? If you were able to become self-aware doesn’t have a heart? I struggle to know if there’s ever hope for they ever love or maybe they loved me and I ruined it or they ruined it

[@RawMotivations]

Continue your healing journey and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence. join our free masterclass here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass