why the patriarchy despises women with standards| Love is Blind Habibi (pt. 1)

[@maithaali7232]

Growing up as an Arab girl when I was younger and used to cry I remember my grandad used to console me and ask me honey why are you crying what do you want the moon I’ll get the moon if that’s what you want👸🏻. But these Arab boys on the show are EMBARRASSING 🥲.

[@saram217]

Saraa didnt coment on this coz you dont hate men

[@SoZ-hr9gc]

Saraaaaa, thank you for this wonderfull video essay, I just finished love is blind habibi and as always went down the rabbit hole of "what's happening outside the show". I was very frustrated while watching the show because of the double standards that were being applied to the women in the show. In the case of karma, nour and dounia it was just so infuriating to see them being attacked and ganged up against. And I was even more shocked when I saw the hikmat podcast, the disrespect was actually crazy. Dounia is old enough and wise enough to know what is her boundary and what the situation is. Like it's as if her emotions and her boundaries aren't valid as if they know better than her. They were litterally mansplaining forgivness to her. In that same podcast, they talked about the fact that nour says in the show that she "hates feminists" and they were saying that they don't understand why the feminists jumped on her side. They were using it to discredit and critisize feminists as well as Nour. Like "oh those crazy feminists defending someone that does't even like them". Just proves that chafic and hikmat don't understand feminism and never actually tried to. Anyways, you articulated your points so well and definitly put words on the way I was feeling, once again thank you.

[@saramoustafagreen]

Hiii :) Thank you so much for your comment! I am really happy you enjoyed my video❤️🥺 I know exactly how you are thinking, and how you feel. I definitely plan on talking more about those issues in future videos!!

[@saram217]

​@@saramoustafagreenI feel sorry for you,you have trauma from the way the men in your life treated you

[@mraheem9214]

​@@saram217leave sara green shes my girl and she always pays for my meal,shes a strong independent woman that listens 🎶 to taytay😮

[@saram217]

@@mraheem9214 I'm fitter than her

[@joelharris2228]

Feminism is a broken ideology that is easily defeated because feminists push “egalitarianism” only where women benefit and “traditionalism” only where women benefit so it’s an ideology that contradicts itself.

[@sophiesz9450]

Men fear that a “gold digger” would leave them for a wealthier man.

[@MsUnknown007]

Exactly

[@saramoustafagreen]

most men who fear "gold diggers" don't have a partner to begin with, the fear is lowkey unfounded...

[@maybedumbledore]

Great video! Just wanted to add a little tangent that the very manipulative practice of "providing" implies that the man will provide for a woman in return for her agency, like you said in the video. Looking at this from a transactional perspective, this means that when a woman blatantly asks for it it irritates a man because the "providing"/"spoiling"/sugarbaby-ing needs to be on HIS terms and not HERS, since she gave away her decision-making powers. For example Nour's demands are a direct challenge of Chafic's superiority, and In a (now precarious) position of power, the man feels no longer obligated to provide because she has breached her part of the "contract". Demanding a form of financial responsibility from a man as a woman also means that men can't exploit this contract by providing as little as possible anymore like they have always been doing. As a man i notice that many in the lower-rich classes of society (which is where the majority of the characters in LBH fall) dont actually like to "spoil" their s/os as much as they can, becaus they just want to keep them around and content (not happy) just so they can claim that their responsibility is fulfilled while also saving up, money is expensive after all.... With little regard for their preferences trad husbands will just throw the bare minimum at their wives so that they can keep her clinging on to him. What that "bare minimum" looks like depends on how much the woman demands before she inevitably reaches a breaking point where she can just find a better option with another dude. As the bringer of status, a wife is nice to have in a man's world, meaning that if a boy can't keep his wife because her "bare minimum" is too uncomfrotable for him to handle, he will try to lower her standards and bash her. I say this not as a theory but because thats actually the way these men feel, and as a survivor of the redpill far-right pipeline (thankfully i grew up lol) ive been through that thought process too.

[@saramoustafagreen]

Hi :) I definitely agree, thanks for sharing!

[@PoliticsGirlie2.0]

This is so soo good! Was looking for something intellectually stimulating on this LBH saga for weeks and this just hit the spot!!! Please keep making more videos, Sara. You killed it with this one :)

[@saramoustafagreen]

Hi :) Thank you so much! I am glad you enjoyed my video❤️

[@alyelhemasy8707]

Girl this video essay is so good OMG. My favorite cats are the ones in the boxes because they’re literally me 😂. Can’t wait for part 2 💐.

[@saramoustafagreen]

Thank you so much❤️!! Her name is Zoey she's one of my favourite cats too🥺

[@ilovesunflowersunny2098]

Lol karma's story is funny..how could she not see the pattern? These men who claim to want traditional wives, always end up picking the opposite. In hopes of taming or changing her. Keep in mind, that he most likely does this to impress his friends like "look at my accomplishment, she is under my control". That's why a lot of men change after getting or marrying the girl.

[@earlybirddreamful]

you know what i think? maybe chafic wants dounja to forgive her dad just so that he has a father in law to pair up with bro-style. maybe he feels a little intimidated after all, by dounja having a strong position about her relationship to her mum and by her mum being a very independent and very strong woman.

[@saramoustafagreen]

maybe... 👀

[@cesararnold1]

Back with another amazing video essay 🤩

[@saramoustafagreen]

Thank you!!

[@charismao5515]

Great breakdown!

[@saramoustafagreen]

Glad you enjoyed it :)

[@haneen8224]

😢❤❤❤❤❤ وييين بارت تووو

[@saramoustafagreen]

@@haneen8224 نفسي اعمله باس والله أنا مشغولة🥲

[@haneen8224]

@@saramoustafagreen take your time 💗

[@saramoustafagreen]

@haneen8224 Hi habibti☺️ Your comment inspired me to work on the second video and it will be out very soon! 👀❤️

[@haneen8224]

@ yaaayy

[@englishblade]

I think Asma is a better example of standards unlike Nour, Nour saying she doesnt like feminism and then saying in the reunion shes pretty and educated which is rare for women to have????? and the weird digs to another woman, girl was it really the comment to make especially in a room where Asma, Karma, Safa are successful business women and Dounia speaks 3 languages fluently while shes a model, closed world view if you think its either beauty or brains But some of the guys said their wants in similar weird fashion so Im not saying shes the only one wrong What I liked about Asma was she was upfront about her wants like wanting a guy who works out, wealthy, liked by her family, had her similar extroverted personality without trying to make it seem different or unique to other girls because shes so special

[@Moonnine34]

You can initiate a divorce as a woman

[@saramoustafagreen]

Women can technically initiate divorces but they don't have the same rights as men in divorce. If a woman wants to divorce a man, she can and its called khlu3a "خلع " -- but under this procedure the woman must leave her mehr and everything her husband gave her (clothes, money, furniture...) which puts women at an extreme disadvantage...

[@saram217]

Mehr? Thats hardly taken back by the guy

[@saram217]

​@@saramoustafagreenguy worked hard to earn ,what did the guy get in return ,women can keep their own guy has to share,like have you shared your money with a money im sure the men in your life have paid for you when haven't provided for any guy

[@mraheem9214]

​@@saramoustafagreen ignore saram! I'm a born again feminist 😊

[@saram217]

@@mraheem9214 ignore me! You won't be saying that if saw me U HAMAR

[@alenef8677]

The problem with Nour’s way of expressing her standards comes across very vain, unrealistic and arrogant. Had she expressed herself more eloquent and with class it would of been best. Most Arab men will provide and protect the women. If the Muslims follow the Quran there wouldn’t be any issues. This is what happens when you want to follow culture instead of the right path. Islam is perfect, Muslims are not. Ya Allah help these people walk in righteousness and integrity so that you may be pleased with them. Shine your light on their hearts. Guide them away from any pride, selfishness, jealousy, hypocrisy, malice and greed and make them uncomfortable with sins. Grant them hidaaya (guidance) and a heart that loves to obey you. Ameen

[@marinel.9216]

15:25 Thisss ; women hurt by double st… 18:50 Gaslight as its finest

[@purplelove3666]

Someone corrrect me if i am wrong,i thought if she was being abused in her marriage by her husband or of she is distressed in her marriage ,she doesnt have to pay her mehrm back?if she is asking for a divorce?but if she is asking for a divorce for no reason then she would have to pay the mehrm back?

[@saramoustafagreen]

Perhaps, but unfortunately in most cases its the woman's words against the mans, and women rareley win in these cases. Most countries in the region don't have laws protecting women from domestic violence in the first place. Even if the violence was recognized, it may be recognized as a form of "behaviour correction"...

[@neraratky]

İ agree with part of your comments, but basicaly we cannot divorce this show from the region and the culture where it is made. Nour is no better than any man. They are all the products of pathological islamic societies where women don't have agency to decide for themselves. Those women mostly come from well off families and they are not used to work and expect glamourus lives.

[@olliecolporteur8268]

you look like troian bellsario

[@saramoustafagreen]

Thanks :) I loved her on Pretty Little Liars!!

[@yahia9481]

Islam=

[@awsomegirl3829]

Not at all

[@sihamel5721]

Nah, men just always have the audacity. What religion they follow doesn't even matter

[@yahia9481]

@awsomegirl3829 yeah right 😆

[@sihamel5721]

@@yahia9481 nah, men just always have the audacity. Doesn’t matter what religion they follow

[@yahia9481]

@@sihamel5721 do i have to mention hadiths and verses ? If i did my comments will dis..... Ibrahamic religions are all like this and islam is very very special case . Study islam and u will understand