Why WOMEN pick FIGHTS: anger is reassuring

Have you ever wondered why your woman seems to create unnecessary difficulties? Why is it that she can become so provocative, seemingly out of the blue? In this episode, I discuss the counterintuitive explanation for why many women pick fights with their partners. Though it might sound strange, anger is actually reassuring, as it demonstrates a person is still sufficiently emotionally invested to fight.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #relationship #women

[@psychacks]

Have you ever wondered why your woman seems to create unnecessary difficulties? Why is it that she can become so provocative, seemingly out of the blue? In this episode, I discuss the counterintuitive explanation for why many women pick fights with their partners. Though it might sound strange, anger is actually reassuring, as it demonstrates a person is still sufficiently emotionally invested to fight. Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jaO7c62HZ613e7M Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: kzbin.info/door/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #relationship #women

[@kungfujoe2136]

it's a shittest depending on how i feel i' ll call it out (what are you doing? why are you doing it? what is the best autcome from that action? what is the worst outcome to that action?) ill play (gamefy that shit) or crush (emotionaly) or ignore

[@andersnielsen6044]

@@kungfujoe2136 Chad and Tyron says: "Thank you, sir.".

[@sallybella8824]

Ha 😂😂 this is my very immature mother Mary Armstrong 😂😂😂

[@whenpigsfly8178]

Before I watched this video, I'm assuming it's that passion beats apathy, like the way the audience is becoming apathetic to Disney-Marvel movies.

[@j.r7872]

I look forward to the future topic: “How to never argue with a woman” Thank you for sharing this information!

[@TylerAnderson-xl6hb]

The irony is that a woman don't realize, if a man is on the fence about her or the relationship, picking fights only reassures the man that she's isn't the one for him. Why would a man want to bring upon unnecessary drama and turmoil into his life?

[@mmmddd4366]

Hey honey, would you like to move to a quiet neighborhood or a ghetto? Ghetto please. If only she had the decency to be honest hey.

[@budbas]

​@@jerryjessup9192You do cut-loss when you pick a stock wrong. The same concept applies here.

[@frederickrossi2150]

@@jerryjessup9192 Yes, that is exactly what he is saying (the answer to your 2nd question) -- basically get out quick when the predetermined amount you are willing to risk as a loss (e.g., $400) is passed.

[@jayc342009]

this happened in my last relationship, i eventually gave up and distanced myself from her.

[@csx6910]

Exactly. I don't need that shit. I want a peaceful life and if that means without her, so be it.

[@mreese8764]

A lot of these "women problems" seem to be narcissists problems.

[@thescarydoor8756]

This is the elephant in the room which is rarely acknowledged. Borderline, narcissist, sociopathic, psychopathic and other mentally ill behaviours are excused as "female nature".

[@hoobeydoobey1267]

Yep. Read Genesis 3 and you'll see it. Satan was the first to fall to 'self', thus I call him the father of narcissists since he was the first. Eve was persuaded by and became a liar and deceiver. Adam, not wanting to be along again because he knew full well what lie ahead, decided to go with her into disobedience than suffer being alone thinking God would have kicked her out, leaving him alone. Now, we'll never know what God would have done had Adam stuck to God's command and instead suffered her fate as God's hand. Instead we're all suffering the fall out and Jesus had to come to pay that price.

[@ay-tj7pj]

the other person is wrong that's why they get mad, not because they are narcissistic

[@wesleycristman3278]

Yup

[@HiHi-vg8lj]

@@ay-tj7pj Actually I think it’s because the other person is right, women hate it when they are wrong.

[@ZetZatar]

An old girlfriend once said to me "Every time we fight I feel a little bit closer" with a smile, as if it was a good thing. I replied truthfully "Every time we fight, I love you a little less."

[@TheRealTJErnie]

Ouch! Same here

[@PapaSwall]

Holy shit dude you went for the jugular on that 💀💀. I recently broke up w my girl of 1 year bc of a fight we had regarding her family. Long story short, I had a negative view on her family n she got super upset abt it (rightfully so I believe) and the whole time I’m like why tf did I say that and all that. 2 weeks later we broke up bc it was a turn off for me. There’s other underlying reasons, but that fight was a part of it. But I also felt that now after seeing this video, makes me think that she wanted me to rely on her a lot and not isolate myself. I thought the isolating was a personal thing, but apparently it’s a somewhat common

[@55tmilam]

God#@&$ you can’t make this stuff up! Female logic!

[@knowbodiesmethod]

FACTS

[@nadzirahfarhah3423]

my god sounds so evil

[@goodlookinouthomie1757]

Honestly this is what destroyed my marriage. I had no idea why my wife was so determined to squabble about every little thing. And the thing in her case was if I did show any anger it immediately switched to "Now you're raising your voice" etc etc. My marriage seemed like one 15 year long shit test.

[@motorbreath7174]

I hear you on this ! We don't actually raise our voice but they are so emotionally unstable and sensitive at the time they can't handle ANY negative feedback . They hear it as "yelling" .Then they talk about the " TONE " we are using . lol ! I'm learning to avoid arguing at all costs

[@MrKanrabat]

Same here bro. 8 years of this shit.

[@idfkidc]

It's just excuses to make you retroactively the bad guy. They started the fight and continued until you got upset, and because you got upset they were justified in starting the fight. Move on from that toxic type as fast as you can

[@zuibeckpulezon4626]

You kept failing the test. You didn't even know what to do. Women only test men they don't trust their leadership. You were Beta

[@babybison2881]

@@MrKanrabat I'm on year 5

[@ronmexico5908]

A lot of the psychology around women is trying to rationalize poor behavior. The main point seems to be not telling women the truth that they need to grow up into an adult

[@ROForeverMan]

Exactly!

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

True but even a old loyal dog will test you sometimes……it’s just in their nature lol

[@Dreweybaby]

They cant.. they’re adult kids with breast

[@mofogie]

real pscyhology research is fairly based in its findings. That's because woke crap which is based on narcissism is unsustainable.

[@jeremyweishaar9523]

Damn bro!

[@tommiller7177]

If she can't be a real queen, she can always be a drama queen.

[@danielwymer1580]

Thats a good one, i’ll try to remember that one!

[@shepherdkings5892]

If you can't be a queen bee a wasp queen will do! 😉

[@Leatherneck1057]

Epic.

[@ilia2178]

My ex was like that and taught me a lot of bad habits over the years. I then started dating a much more sensible woman who picked up on it very quickly and told me these habits make it very difficult for her to deal with me. She had to re-teach me on how to communicate my emotions properly, never picked any unnecessary fights and gave me space to process. There are good, rational and mindful women out there. I hope everyone can find one.

[@richardcarr6493]

what bad habbits and what did the new re teach exactly ??

[@TheJoaneD]

Wonderful. So glad you found someone to turn "this" around. Everyone deserves peace.

[@William-the-Guy]

I am suspicious that she TAUGHT you. That does not sound like an equal power dynamic. Out of curiosity, how long have you been with this wonderful, rational woman? Has it been a good 7+ years, sonit had time to go through the normal relationship cycle?

[@ilia2178]

@@William-the-Guy It's an expression. She did not give me seminars.

[@William-the-Guy]

@@ilia2178 yes. I do know how expressions work. Not really sure what you meant to accomplish with that. My point is that all relationships go through a honeymoon period, statistically divorce tends to come after 5-7 years of marriage. I am wondering if you have cleared that hurdle or not.

[@Topher.86]

Another thing ive learned over the years. A woman will also start arguments when she is seeing another man on the side. If you and your woman havent fought for years and then out of nowhere, she starts petty arguments. Look into why and dont let it go unnoticed. Chance are she's talking to or seeing anothe man.

[@henrymorgan3420]

Bingo, me too. It was guilt reflected back on me which meant I got double the punishment.

[@Saskidan]

I experienced that one day when she was off to see her ex and told me she had appointments but she was extremely aggravated that morning. When I looked at her phone after getting the password I saw that that specific date coincided with her text to him that they were going to meet.

[@78JCarter]

Two decades of this and one day I just said “I am moving the f out.” Since then my life has become completely epic. It was one of my finest moments. Never tolerate this behavior. Life it too short.

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

No offense brother but you should have checked that behavior years ago or left years ago…

[@sekovittol3124]

@@user-pp9bl5gr1n It's more complicated than just upping and leaving after many years in. You have to untangle some things first.

[@comment3711]

Damn, that’s exactly what she was afraid of and why she picked all those fights. She was right about you all along.

[@katielowen]

Two decades of life wasted is extremely sad. Rip brother 😔

[@KGDRAWROF]

Two decades is quite a while but many people never leave that situation. I can genuinely say congratulations! Make the most out of life from where you presently are..

[@Richard_AKL]

Had an ex who would do this - one day she even told me, "You're so cold and heartless - you don't feel anything." Meanwhile I was doing everything in my power to control my anger at the truly nasty and disrespectful way she would treat me. Then one night a drunk crashed into my car (we were sitting in her car across the road from my parked car and she was nagging and moaning as usual when it happened, so we were safe, but saw it all happen). When I did not get angry or throw a temper tantrum at the drunk, or the fact I remained calm at the loss of my car (complete write off), things changed completely. She saw that it was actually a strength not a weakness that I did not respond like a child, and everything changed after that, and she was much more attracted to me. Fortunately for me, I would eventually come to my senses and broke it off with her because I would not tolerate the constant nagging and disrespect.

[@AUSTIN-ss2zd]

Woman are more addicted to listening to psyop celebrities mk ultra slaves and singers who make their child psych even more childish. One time I had a girl assault me because I didn't want to be sexual with her on the 3rd date, she came from a black neighborhood and seemed like no one had told her no before. I dodged a nuke.

[@AUSTIN-ss2zd]

I don't like Gypsy crusader but can see why he got popular so fast

[@drumsnbass]

The more my ex- pushed me for a reaction, the less reaction she got. Then I was often told “you have no emotions”. No you dumbs**t, I just don’t want to unleash my frustrations on your stupidity.

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

Smart man

[@ssing7113]

Ok “so mature and wise one”. Which is why you were disrespected from the beginning because you couldn’t hold frame and she walked all over you nagging and moaning. A lot of you think your smart leaving women instead of understanding them and being the better player.

[@miknes12345]

In the movie 'As good as it gets', Jack Nicholson plays the author or romance novels. He is at one point asked by a gushing female fan: 'How do you write women so well' - to which he answers, 'I think of a man, and take away reason and accountability'.

[@glennerd3125]

Comparing women to children was spot on!!!

[@booty4801]

No accountability

[@dsadik666]

Children with the right to vote...

[@dsadik666]

Children with the right to vote...

[@AJ-qn6gd]

That’s not fair to kids !

[@lencumbow]

Women who pick fights to confirm their man's continued caring are pathetic. Stay away from women like that.

[@JJ-wi2uw]

Agreed. The juice is not worth the squeeze.

[@ricardoh87]

So stay away from all women then?

[@argablarga]

@@ricardoh87 if that's the only type of woman you've had in your life, you're leading a sad life and you need to take a good, long, hard look at yourself and why that is your situation.

[@ricardoh87]

@@argablarga madonna-whore complex

[@Ratclan]

It’s a natural biological response from Two people being in a relationship. The male and female dynamic will hold true no matter which one you are with….. the female will almost always do this 99% of the time. Why do you think every married couple goes through the exact same thing every other married couple goes through. It’s biological, not a Conscious choice but rather an Unconscious one.

[@dreddy_g]

I had an ex who tried to pick a fight with me in public TWICE. The first time, I let it slip and apologized, proceeded with the evening, and dropped her off at her house. The second time, I apologized, and dropped her off at her house. I then politely asked her via text to never see me again. Never again. A pretty face and a tight body is NOT worth it if she's crazy. No.

[@titoslounge1946]

How did she respond?

[@dreddy_g]

@@titoslounge1946 She still sends me random texts here and there after 8 months.

[@JohnM...]

@@titoslounge1946who gives a crap? The minute you dump her she’s ancient history.

[@julesfalcone]

​@@titoslounge1946That's the wrong question?

[@donatello9482]

97% are crazy

[@jbb8261]

I watched my Mom do this to my dad growing up. It taught me to be the complete opposite. I think this is a behavior that should not be tolerated more than a few times under any circumstance. Women like this need to be alone as not to create hell for their families.

[@StevenWJRichards]

I married a woman who needed constant reassurance. It was such a relief when I got divorced.

[@bigedslobotomy]

Another reason women feel better after picking at you until you explode, is that then they can be the VICTIM, and are absolved of all responsibility for what happens. If you don’t respond at all, they have to deal with the fact that THEY might be the problem, and that drives them crazy. Narcissists also use this tactic (of picking a fight) and are best dealt with by going “gray rock” (being as interesting and combative as a gray rock), because they cannot manipulate that to their advantage.

[@mediocreman2]

Excellent point. Whatever they can do to make someone else the bad guy, they will do. When women talk poorly of their exes, I just say 'I see', or something like that because I know they want me to react and be on their side. It's interesting to watch their turmoil when I don't react the way they want.

[@jayc342009]

My mum has done this since i was a child, i learned to ignore here and walk off.

[@OrwellsHousecat]

It's FemiNarcissism

[@JJ-wi2uw]

Well said.

[@dimokenchev]

All women are narcissists.

[@Stukkeman]

Anyone who picks fights is introducing unnecessary drama and they’ve proven themselves incompatible with my life.

[@bubbleboy821]

So have you decided to be gay then

[@NYKgjl10]

Well said!!

[@a64738]

EXACLY this is narcissist's behavior and not normal at all !!!

[@cryptic2079]

Something is fundamentally and seriously wrong with that gender.

[@justicegusting2476]

I prefer the phrase, “proven themselves to be undeserving OF life.”

[@stronensycharte64]

After 5 years and a kid later, Im finally free and shes moving out within the month. I do not tolerate shit tests anymore and will never settle ever again. If that means i die alone so be it. I deserve better.

[@appeljuicesurf]

We all die alone. And marriage also ever ends in death or divorce, so live a happy life.

[@mrsimo7144]

I'm a serving fire fighter. A colleague of mine was recently killed in a car accident. My Ex GF told me days later, that her sister had died in a car accident. I offered to help etc. Yesterday, my 10 yo son told me that she wasn't dead. She was on insta. I challenged the ex to explain why she said that, and she lost her shit at me and forced me out the house. I'm absolutely lost as to why she would say this?! Attention? It's so twisted. 😡

[@zenastronomy]

that's a psycho. run.

[@ssing7113]

A wise person once told me: “want to defeat someone completely. Act as if they were dead and ignore them 100%”

[@benjamincjholmes]

And in your thoughts too.

[@EazyD-E]

You are a Scorpio or at least that wise person is.

[@quise3]

This distance not gon be reassuring at all

[@gwenstefanirockx]

My ex loved the dopamine rush from a fight before bed. She would sleep like a baby and I would need at least another hour to unwind.

[@thebesttheworst2277]

... Haha lived it. Or when they argue before a meal and can eat fine and you're now drained and lost your appetite. Or when they start a fight on Friday night after work, just as you were looking forward to plans you'd made together and a nice chilled weekend and they can carry on like nothing is even wrong in their world. I could go on and on, in the end - you can't reason with an unreasonable person.

[@jbdsvld8175]

Annoying that they can basically dump their problems and make it our problem when it best suits them and it least suits us.

[@franknada8235]

So many women become more sexually active in conjunction with a dispute. Some even need that for any sex drive. Hence the term make-up-sex. It's weird but it's a real thing.

[@Hellenicheavymetal]

@@franknada8235 that's so sad haha

[@andrewcolleypropertiesreal1941]

Extremely thought provoking. ‘I’m angry because I’m still emotionally involved a year after the break up’ once I’m no longer interested I’ll be at peace

[@delawar3]

I just brought this up to my gf who was sitting beside me as I was watching this, and said "Hey that sounds familiar. Every time WE ever have gotten into an argument, by the end of it, I'll look over at you and recognize that you've become noticeably more at peace with yourself. Almost as though you enjoyed that whole experience. Then you sleep like a baby." She responds, "Fascinating" and goes back to reading her book. They know they're doing it. They just don't care if it negatively affects us. We're basically just glorified cat scratching posts to these people. Good to know I guess....

[@cryptic2079]

Everything is about them

[@officersquarehead]

All women are narcissists who know we'll put up with it.

[@MidnightPolaris800]

Dump her

[@RedGreenLugar]

No wonder some guys go gay. I don't blame em, they just hangout with their buddy and have a nice day. They don't have to deal with women and all their nonsense

[@Andreas-xx8go]

Are you still with this lady?

[@fronttowardenemy9994]

How is this not considered emotional domestic abuse?

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

A test is once in a blue moon, abuse is a daily thing…..know the difference and know when to play along and know when to let that person go

[@chipsteve]

It is. 2023 is clown world. Women are empowered when they get their way, victims when they don't. When men act horribly in LTRs, they're monsters. When women act horribly in LTRs, they're just insecure & misunderstood bc they need more more more from men, who aren't manning up & satiating all her f'd up "needs".

[@whispr_2ME]

It's mostly subconscious/instinctual when it's not malicious. Calling it abuse is akin to women calling men predatory for being more physically attracted to youthful women. Evolutionarily speaking: a female's entire survival strategy was securing the protection of her and her future children from a competent male. If that male turns out to be incompetent, then then you die and your lineage ends. I think this is the reason why it's traditionally been so important for women to get married, and why they would be arranged a lot of the times. A man not being able to keep his house in order when faced with his woman's emotions is not a great sign that he can protect her and the children from all the dangers of life. Maybe this is a bit controversial, but I could also see it serving as a test of how the man will react to and discipline their future children. Children are far more emotionally volatile, and test boundaries all the time. It's important to remember that a lot of our behaviors are informed by instincts that allowed our ancestors to survive. It makes far more sense to try to understand these instincts and proceed accordingly, than to simply condemn them as illogical and harmful.

[@lieutenantpepper2734]

Because world leaders have wives that keep them under control by using these tactics already. It's like a cartel.

[@Andytlp]

@@whispr_2ME Very well said. Of course our ancestors didnt know about psychology and reasons behind these actions. Now that people can just read up on this both men and women can pretend to be someone theyre not. OR at least try to better themselves.

[@remkojerphanion4686]

It's the men - the adults in the room, that have to put up with childish behaviour because these poor women are "victims" of their own emotions. I might excuse that kind of behaviour from 13 year old girls, but to excuse adult women of doing the same? NO WAY.

[@andersnielsen6044]

What a cute way to come out of the closet.. :D

[@ROForeverMan]

@@andersnielsen6044 Who hurt you ?

[@ni9274]

No, this guy is straight wrong, men create as many problems in relationships than women you’re just trying to reassure yourself cause you have inferiority complex

[@zowdeezowdee]

​@@andersnielsen6044😂 paedo vibes

[@captainsouth4460]

Most of them are still 13 yos that now drink too much.

[@uwillnevernoewhoiam]

I overheard my coworker says that when she and her husband feel too comfortable with each other she will pick a fight with her husband. She says that she feel that there should always be a fight every now and then. I always thought that that was the most insane thing ever, but thanks to this vid I'm starting to understand. I still don't like it though.

[@TheSickjits]

Worst fucking nightmare.

[@gforce97]

i also blame our current society not holding women accountable enough, and u see why most of them get away with domestic abuse and entitled behavior

[@JeddieT]

I love the way you compare women with children. It’s developmentally true.

[@RPMT]

Narcissists also feed on emotional responses and there is a sadistic aspect to this in both cases.

[@recyclespinning9839]

100% narcissists do indeed have a sadistic nature and enjoy getting an emotional response after they bait you. I think they feed off your energy , beware....

[@roypeaslee1305]

I let my wife push my buttons resulting in shouting matches which caused me to become nauseated. I would take a walk to get over the feeling and find that the spat was over when I returned. One day I told myself that I had enough of this nonsense and that I wasn't going to respond to these attacks anymore. Shortly after that, my wife left me for another man which brought me peace and serenity that I hadn't felt in years. Wish I had known about this psychological syndrome when I was dating her.

[@arthurmorgan8966]

they act all cute, innocent, well behaving until you put the ring on it. then you're f'ed. get ready to put up with their crap and lose 50% of your net worth.

[@raguellagrande7344]

I once asked a friend of mine how he tolerates juggling 3 women in his 50s. He revealed he would start drama on purpose about fun stuff and leave immediately if it was drama or blame coming his way. Apparently they like being toyed with to make them angry and then feel even better when the anger washes away and she feels good. I call it the emotional slap and tickle.

[@friendlyanomaly6109]

Push & pull baby!

[@AndRei-yc3ti]

If youre not starting fights with your women, youre doing it wrong

[@OptimistFrancis]

😂😂

[@user-fi7rf8nk7z]

I learned the hard way to never argue with a woman. When my late wife was trying to argue I would just tell her I was not going to argue and walk away. She learned quickly that I would talk about anything but never argue.

[@runderwo]

When a kid is in the picture and the woman is pushing some insane idea with respect to bringing up your kids, not arguing isn't an option and they know that.

[@docbailey3265]

You must have had a large house.

[@legacyandrews1339]

​@@docbailey3265for real because mine would follow me around and even unlock the bathroom door with a debit card or knife. And if I try to go outside she blocks the door then shit always escalates 😂

[@jo-annewoodbridge5882]

She didn't follow you to continue her argument?! 😮

[@sorryociffer]

I did the same but by saying “When you are ready to have this discussion like an adult, you know where to find me. Then I’d calmly close the door and go back to what I was doing. Drove her bonkers….

[@jjohnson6471]

You constantly equate women with children....and its 100% accurate.

[@kaiserpuppydog7174]

Even so, they are allowed to vote.

[@jjohnson6471]

@@kaiserpuppydog7174Like most things in history, if you look into the origins, the movement to allow women to vote is not as described at all. Women go through life without needing to know things about the world like men do and just follow the MSM. It will never happen but we need to repeal the 19th. I also think àlot of men shouldn't be voting either and definitely not illegals

[@bill_y4762]

omg😂…. i so wish i could disagree with this comment

[@ZackLee]

Because clearly your the role model adult in the room

[@SevScout]

They kinda need to be a bit like children, because of the fact that they are the child bearers. You won't know what problems a baby has, if you aren't a single little bit like that tiny creature. So, this can be forgiven... There are cases, though, where they go a bit too far.

[@mikep9913]

What gets me is that in an argument the woman is often quick to say that it’s me who’s keeping the argument going and yet she is the one who always has to have the last word. Roger Moore was right when he used to say that he’d always have the last word when arguing with a woman. It was: “Yes, dear.”

[@Scientist_Salarian]

I couldn’t click on this video fast enough. This makes so much sense within my marriage! You earned a new subscriber today. Ironically, I’d show this to my wife, but it would start a fight.

[@FreeSalesTips]

Show it her. When she starts a fight, you can verbally tell her that you're withdrawing your emotions until she understands that you won't feed her with emotions.

[@ridgerunner3364]

🤣😂 You are correct sir!! Well said!

[@thomasdaka9920]

Shared it with my gf. Started a fight and now she isn't talking 😢.

[@deezworld2318]

Another reason I can't live with any woman again. I value my peace more than anyone.

[@Profitglutton90]

Amen.

[@leejee88]

I learned the hard way not to live with women after I split from current gf of 3 years I will NEVER EVER live with a woman again as a matter of fact im done with dating all together I don't have kids im 40 never been married .I plan to keep it that way its not worth it and I was happier when I was single

[@mauricegiuliani3806]

​@@leejee88Same here. I have been alone for three years. I am feeling really happy now. I am so focused. It is the best way to live ones life nowadays.

[@leejee88]

@@mauricegiuliani3806 got a friend who literally said fuck it bought a van and now with his dog lives out of it hes never been happier im thinking on doing the same

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

Y’all fools sound like cowards….yes being single is peaceful but being a man and correcting your women and shaping her into the women u want her to be is even Better!!!

[@engineerofthemachine]

Great video! I had this exact problem with my ex-wife. When we argued I always needed to go for a walk and be alone. It drove her insane and that wasn’t my intention. All I wanted to do was calm down so I didn’t say anything I would regret and possibly make the argument worse.

[@Profitglutton90]

She sounded toxic as hell.

[@srikrishnavasanth3895]

I don't know the full story but just based on this. women only ignore people whom they don't like and want attention badly. maybe she misunderstood this one or took ego of that you make her feel wrong.

[@Wong-Jack-Man]

I did that one time and never came came back home true story. She always thinks we will get back together. Women although they are upset don’t want you to leave they want to be heard and then reassured and conflict resolved.

[@bunny.bunbob]

The answer is simple. Your behavior is avoidant and hers is anxious. She's afraid she's losing you when you go away. For her it feels like the problem isn't solved and you just go away and the problem will come up again and again. That hard to understand? 2 avoidant don't pair BTW. Why? They simpy avoid each other too much to build a connection

[@joeconnolly4353]

Have to fight the urge to say something smart. Trick is to tell them to FO sooner rather than later. Unfortunately some of us don't want to fight with women or point out their flaws. Selfish and egocentric a lot of the time.

[@thecasualreviewer2148]

It's been happening to me A LOT more lately. It's getting to the point of me kicking a lot of women out of my life. It's getting awfully played out

[@Salty_fenrir]

This makes so much sense. I work in a female dominated field (hospital) and they always seemed to be most upset when their outbursts are met with me seeming disinterested and thinking of a solution.

[@brianfitch5469]

Ya they hate solutions they just wanna complain. But hey at least in that field and lots of empty beds things happen. Seems like every doctor has a harem of nurses.

[@memememe21656]

They never want a solution. My wife hates it when I try to help

[@danielstewart8106]

I saw this many times at the dinner table when I was growing up. When a woman is complaining about her day at work, she doesn't want to hear your solutions: she just wants to vent. You let her vent and then say: "You had a hard day" and move on. It can be very effective.

[@LBBeatsIRS]

The problem is some women WANT fights. If you fight back, you lose. If you just walk away, you lose. The best solution is to…a new woman! 🦅

[@friendlyanomaly6109]

Why do you lose if you fight back?

[@48Ender48]

@@friendlyanomaly6109 you've never been in a relationship before have you? 😝

[@sleeperno1215]

I don’t lose much anymore unless I truly was at fault. It is akin to the silent treatment but not to manipulate. It is a boundary. Women are unnerved when you disengage and they can no longer push your buttons. When she treats me with respect (as I treat her the same) then I re engage.

[@officersquarehead]

New woman; new fights.

[@vodkasimmons7915]

@@officersquareheadnew woman same moveset 😂

[@lamario]

Stoicism, fellas, it's you most powerful tool when dealing with both men and women.

[@starfeel6127]

He literally just told you that not reacting makes her anxious

[@lacerdafelipe]

@@starfeel6127 Yes, but getting angry when women pick unnecessary fights is rewarding bad behavior. You hold your emotions until she behaves correctly.

[@kainoa2k]

He also said that not responding with emotion is perceived as a punishment and the bad behavior stopped @1:45

[@Chilltown4eva]

​@@starfeel6127There are two internal responses I had to your response, so I might as well share. 1. You have a point. If she's your woman, and you care about her, it is sensible to want to help her navigate her anxiety. However, this can lead to exhaustion should it occur too often. 2. Her internal state is hers and hers alone, therefore, it is something she must to learn to resolve on her own. This is true of any individual, male or female, if personal growth is a desired outcome in life. Each must ask oneself, "am I in this relationship to needlessly add to another's burdens or to experience the harmonious interplay that may occur through mutual support and cooperative intent?"

[@TheGrindBoardGame]

Well said.

[@lewisjones3345]

This is just too accurate! My wife will pick a fight, piss me off, and go about her merry way and I’m pissed for like 2 days. But I get it soothed her anxiety and that’s all she really needed.

[@ltsiver]

The problem with this behavior is that it is self destructive. Intentionally poking the bear for psychological reassurance is going to alienate the partner, and the partner will only tolerate that for so long.

[@bluebaby4964]

Marriage between lesbians is x3 more likely to end in divorce compared to gay men. 90% of divorces in heterosexual couples is initiated by women. As a man, you're entering the most important arrangement in your life with a very unreliable partner. It's NOT your fault that the marriage ended no matter what she says. Stay strong king

[@tdaye6978]

The last stats I saw were WAY worse for lesbians. In fact, their divorce rate was FIVE times that of gay men. From what I read, gay men have a 14% divorce rate while lesbians have a 72% divorce rate. Men are better at relationships because they play fewer games with each other. "Women understand women and they don't like each other".

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

Funny thing is I know lesbians and even they admit women are emotional 😂😂….I have to disagree some men did cause their relationship/marriage to end

[@mrfake675]

Ever hung out with a lesbian? Not marriage material

[@Kenny-28]

lesbian women were more likely than gay men to report having been in an abusive same-sex relationship (41% and 28% respectively)

[@DefinitelyNotAMachineCultist]

@@user-pp9bl5gr1n You can actually do this with a lot of stats that, at first, appear to paint our rainbow friends in a negative light. Broke: _Ermahgerd lesbians are 3x more _ Woke: _Women are 3x more _

[@prschuster]

I've punished a lot of women by walking away and not reacting, because I don't like useless drama. For 50 years women have lied to men, telling us to be nice and sensitive, and now they find that offensive.

[@milieu675]

So grown women are emotionally akin to children. Got it.

[@user-em1dg3he1h]

I learned this long ago , take my advice , take advantage of it , go ahead and do what you want ESPECIALLY if she does not approve. You give her a reason to fulfill her need to be angry , but you gain the ability to at least control what she is angry about. That way you always know where you stand , so much better than being in the dark.😊

[@steveos5112]

Ok let me see if I got this right . On top of the nagging, complaining, emasculation, drama and general disrespect. Now allowing her to pick a fight for her own warm and fuzzy should go on the list to a happy mutual relationship. Got it

[@andersnielsen6044]

That is the secure way to put your woman in the arms of Chad and Tyron.. ;)

[@Plans4YouJer2911]

LOL LOL LOL ROFLMBO 😆 🤣 😂 😅 😄 NOT

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

2 ways to stop the testing…. 1. Hard rough sex 2. Play fighting

[@DeadlyPlatypus]

Yes. Society is designed to cater to women's insanity and there's no winning.

[@bungkusi2432]

The karen were born...

[@craigwillms61]

Men - at least me - don't like drama. That makes us boring. A bored woman is a problem waiting to happen. Your best defense is make the situation humorous. Women like to laugh - it's a good emotion. Hard to fight when you're laughing.

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

Imagine you’re James Bond and play it cool and playful…….rough sex and outside of sex playfully putting your arms arm her neck or playfully spanks will get that boredom out of her quick

[@bigthangz5489]

or just pick the fights first,pre-emptive strikes😂 or command h€r to clean the kitchen n wash the windows then theres no strength to pick fights withu😂😂

[@phillipadams4691]

I think you're right. Make light of it and don't get seriously upset. If you're too tired or uncomfortable to make jokes, let her know that you can't deal with it right now and get yourself some space. If it keeps happening too often, tell her you can't deal with it and if all else fails, leave. That's better than being emotionally manipulated. Don't give your personal power to another person. Male, female, friend, family or lover. Respect yourself.

[@pupper5580]

That's a nice trick, thank you for sharing. Philosopher's stone is being able to turn something worthless into gold. Turning anger and fights into humor is a good example of a philosopher's stone.

[@jermaineandrews5913]

@bigthangz5489 women will start arguments even if theyre tired or exhausted; they will argue to the detriment of their time, money, & health. A man walking/driving away from insignificant unnecessary arguement is power! Less arguments = less stress & more freedom & happiness & satisfaction & get more important sh×× done

[@houdinididiit]

I just don’t do drama. The more unnecessary drama people create around me… The more I pull away.

[@mikecoyle7139]

Wow, you just described my wife and I. I met her 50 years ago, we’ve been married for 47 years. It’s taken me a long time to get to the point where I don’t say too much of the ‘wrong thing’ and cause an escalation once she starts, but I’m still often left wondering what just happened. Great to hear you say it all and have it hit the mark. Looking forward to your video about why women never apologize, that has mystified me.

[@Ibian666]

Women are allergic to responsibility.

[@user-kt5gd2yu7l]

Women are too insecure to admit they were wrong. It would literally destroy them to apologize. You just have to know that no man received a sincere apology ever.

[@kevamor435]

Yeah, it's a real turn off when a woman picks unnecessary fights. I want my relationship to be an oasis from drama, not a source of it.

[@NickNxNx]

Well said I've also been told "The older you get, the less drama you need in your life, because you're just so tired from years of life to have yet another issue/drama added" So true

[@RichardAnthonyButler]

I wish I had access to this information 30 years ago. My wife was in the habit of picking a fight before bedtime- I assumed at the time it was to make sure I wasn't in a state of mind to think sex was on the cards ( and thus avoid having to outright reject my advances), now I see that it may have been an attempt to reasure herself of my continued interest in a way that preserved her self respect if it didn't pan out the way she wanted. My response at the time was evasion- stay a little longer reading a book or watching TV or leave a little earlier an be asleep when she went to bed. I responded to unavoidable fights by becoming icily distant and hyperrational. At the time I felt that it was not a bad relationship, but ultimately I thought it wasn't worth the effort of fixing, that it would lead to a life of misery. So I left. In the years after I have not found anyone I liked enough to tolerate this kind of shit from. All I can say is get a dog or a cat- they are much better companions.

[@jayd6372]

Aw bro, been there with the fight before bed thing. 8 years of that crap, she would unload and literally passout midsentance, which stopped me from getting any sort of resolution, so i couldnt sleep. Just laying there, comforting our dog as she would shake some when my ex screamed, stareing at the ceiling in the dark. She slept like a log, I could not even wake her to reply. That one thing after 8 years was the big one in deciding to leave her. The first night after I moved out I slept 11 hours, drempt for the first time in years, it was the best nights sleep I had since before I met her. There was a study of some male priests that showed they had the same life expectency as women, I swear its the constate stress men have to deal with on top of stress both sexes have to deal with in relationships that does guys in earlier.

[@rayrwyr]

@@jayd6372 -- I wonder: what if you had told her: behave else get divorced. Women (unless they have other guys in mind) hate to be alone and they can change overnight at the fear of losing you.

[@vuja9612]

The world needs a podcast with you and Stirling Cooper! I feel like you guys would be the best dating couch duo in existence. You bring the psychological aspect, while Stirling brings the giant experience in the physical aspect through he's career.

[@MogoFromHell]

I chuckled when I heard "and you can see this in children too"

[@doombeagle4262]

Had a girl break up with me because she said I didn't care enough to hit her. I was 19 and that absolutely stunned me. I literally had no idea what to say in response to that.

[@kevinchoi6792]

Bro what

[@whispr_2ME]

Definitely some dysfunction there. Her dad probably hit her mom from time to time, and how our parents treat each other usually has a big impact on what we think is normal in a relationship. Physical violence is probably the grandest expression of anger a man can do to a woman, so she must've just thought your emotions weren't all that strong for her.

[@rayrwyr]

Don't believe in their explanation why they break up with you. 80% of the time it is gaslighting. Real reason was she found another guy to upgrade to.

[@jo-annewoodbridge5882]

That is really f'ed up! 😮. She needs therapy for that problem. Cripes!

[@isambo400]

Nothing to say but “Thank you”

[@peripheralparadox4218]

This is solipsism at its core. Making you feel bad to make her feel better.

[@etherspin]

It's not if they don't realise why they are doing it and don't know the explicit difference between how they interact with their guy VS what can actually work OK with their female friends

[@peripheralparadox4218]

@@etherspin it’s still solipsism wether they’re conscious of it or not.

[@SeniorAdrian]

I do agree. I prefer to argue if i see bad behavior.

[@SevScout]

It's not that simple. The female mind has child-bearing at its core, as it's an evolutionary feature against extinction. They need to be viscerally familiar with being self-centered and egotistical, for a baby is exactly that and it can't fend for itself. It's a blessing and a curse, but with this enlightenment comes freedom. The secret's out!

[@vornamenachname594]

@@peripheralparadox4218 I don't think it's solipsism either way, actually

[@Michael-oj5pr]

Yep, i see it even in my family: creating conflict on purpose and then being the victim; anything for ANY attention

[@lotsaspaghetticodejr.6488]

As a child who was viciously beaten by his father from the age of about 5 or 6 all the way up until I was 19 where I watched him die in front of me, only to still have nightmares about him now that I am 34 years old... I can definitely say I'd rather have had NO attention from him, than the negative attention that I got.

[@nsebast]

This is what I did with wife at first. When she cross the line giving me no respect. I didnt lash out, I just cut her out of my life emotionally. I did this for a month, and the moment she realizes that I wont back down and this matter is important to me. She learns not to disrespect me again. I dont do this to hurt her. I am a self-sufficient contented guy. And without her, I'll be living my life peacefully and contented. If she adds value to my life I want to be with her. If she doesnt add to it, I rather be alone hence the indifference.

[@RemziCavdar]

You did good! Never reward bad behaviour with any attention or emotion. I also learned this from another man.

[@sandboy5880]

I love how he started to talk about women's emotions and then immediately compared them to children XD This is how you know that he knows what he's talking about.

[@mr.joeblack3831]

👍🏽👍🏽

[@bluecoin3771]

We allowed serial narcissism to grow unchecked in half of our population for 50 years. Time to course correct before things become unsalvageable.

[@shawnchuang1450]

Lack of physical consequences is a big factor

[@LegendaryArchiver]

Getting away with it makes them addicted to it.

[@xadion6866]

@@LegendaryArchiver especially so. they use this as a massive power tactic to control you and make you feel and do things that you would otherwise be happy without doing so. this is their survival... unfortunately.

[@flowstate2394]

I have a female gamer friend of many years, we became good friends and talked every day, but now after like 3/4 years she has been getting in her emotions and causing problems for our friendship, if she is annoying me and i take a break from talking to her, she apparently gets hurt even though i explain myself to her. Such a thing happened again recently and i talked to her again after waiting for things to settle because she was annoying me, jumping in, giving her opinion before ive finished talking, getting bitter over funny videos i share to her, at the end after it was supposed to all be sorted out she starts listing every little time ive apparently hurt her by not talking to her or doing some other shit, cause she needs instant gratification, i told her to have some retraint and respect my boundaries, but she couldnt understand why i didnt give her what she wanted straight away. And i just had enough. I went off at her telling her to stop with the manipulation, i am well and truly tired of her, and ill be so glad if i never hear from her again. Being blamed for her feelings over petty shit over and over, not letting it go, is too much for me. And now that shes gone im so relieved. Women dont make good friends, period.

[@busimo]

He explained piece by piece what happened to me in the last few days, everything, spot on, to the point. Thank you PsycHacks!

[@lordkinbote3461]

Thank you for rightly stating women act out just like children.

[@Silvio_Spina]

Exactly

[@didierdenice7456]

I'm Christian but I found interesting that the Mulslim Koran written in the 7th century AD mentions many times the childish irresponsible behavior and reactions of women. The Koran translation in English that "men are superior to women" is not enirely correct. In Arab language the actual meaning is that "men have to show responsibility for women and protect them", ... yes just like with children ! 😂

[@Humanaut.]

the koran says many things. it also contains a 4 step instruction on how to beat your woman and it tells you why you should fight against unbelievers and use violence to spread you faith.@@didierdenice7456

[@abigailcosta1716]

It's fascinating how y'all struggle to understand why women can't stand you.

[@fritzeckstein95]

@@abigailcosta1716as a dude. i agree with you. its not about pointing out that either side is right or wrong but understanding that we handle situations differently. Communication and understanding about the latter is key to a successful cohabitation.

[@zaum2002]

The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.

[@JJ-wi2uw]

THIS

[@rm6857]

Thats what they get if they bring drama

[@wills9732]

Are you a fan of Stardusk aka the Thinking ape?

[@incognito1016]

I just got the perfect explanation for some of the most insane quarrels I have had with prior girlfriends and current wife. Thanks for this. Now it makes sense.

[@foff9275]

Perfect, I feel my pain. I just received hours of counseling without a copayment. Outstanding.

[@dancq4237]

Yes. I experienced this with my narc ex-wife constantly. The last meaningful thing I told her was, "Yeah. It is all my fault." I am since divorced and couldn't be happier.

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

We gotta vet this women better before the ring

[@gabrielWachong]

"women have the same mental stability as a child" Dr Taliban 😂😂😂😂🔥🔥🔥🔥

[@jacobthompson603]

This was very eye opening for me as I've been learning from my past relationship. It's unfortunate I'm learning this now, but thank you for talking about it.

[@KevinShriner]

Absolutely matches my relationship experiences. Seems obvious now that you put it together and can't believe i didn't see it. Magnified because I used to reactively match her anger and end up saying and doing things I wasn't proud of, so trained myself to take a break or walk away so I could cool off and be rational. That would freak them out because they would feel abandoned so I had to learn to say "Ok, Im getting emotional and I don't want to say or do something I regret so I'm going to go for a walk or go home or whatever. I love you, I'm coming back and we'll talk about this again, but for now I am not thinking clearly/can't think clearly, so I'm going to leave for now." -- that worked pretty well but I realize that as a professional and a man I generally work to remove emotion from my life and words when speaking. Bringing high emotion to conflict with other men increases chances of aggression/bad outcomes, so I try to be stoic in most interactions. Bringing high energy into conflicts with women led me to being upset or disappointed in myself because of what I said or did. Absolutely a light bulb moment as to one of likely the reasons my last relationship failed. Too little emotion. I guess there is a balance I still need to find. Great video. Very helpful. I'll think on it and look forward to how to avoid fights with her in the future video! (I can do conflict, but typically the conflicts/fights with her seem trivial to me and usually not rationally based. I have a hard time with that. I try to stay cool and still respect she is feeling it, but I think my non-reaction may be a problem. Lol, on the other hand, me laughing out loud and saying "that's ridiculous, A, B, C, are all true so why would you think D is not true?" ..heh, that doesn't seem to help either.) So, I'll be looking forward to your next video!

[@andrewm.8841]

This is my Mom. She has trauma issues, and she picks fight with anyone in my family old enough to have an opinion. Now, almost everyone shuts down, stone-walls her, and let's her do her usual routine. 1. Pick a fight over something insignificant. 2. Get upset that nothing is ever done right. (Her way.) 3. Individual stares blankly into her eyes. 4. She runs off because nobody 'respects' her. 5. Mad at everyone for a few days, just for the Cycle to hit No.1 again. I love my Mom, but after 20 years of her doing this, and doing my best to help her have a good relationship with her kids... I gave up... Now I too just ignore it.

[@daggern00b]

Wow, you just described my mom exactly. Even down to the order in which the "cycle" happens. Have also come to the same conclusion as yourself in how to deal with it. This pattern must be quite common....

[@petrsehnal7990]

Very well explained. I managed to convince my partner that when she feels anxious, the best course of action is to come immediately hug me. This works wonders ❤

[@sreal-iron5898]

a man of culture

[@sreal-iron5898]

no seriously, i can not emphasize this enough of HOW GOOD of an advice this is

[@sreal-iron5898]

he is a blessed man who has a wife like this, which understood this assignment to just come up and hug (or communicate like a grown adult in a suitable way other than picking a fight)

[@highelf6086]

​@@sreal-iron5898anxious about what?

[@rageagainstmyhatchet]

What if she always feels anxious? And then you never get a second's peace, but when you do she gets anxious and starts a fight?

[@brunofeitosafl]

It's funny that this video was the first to appear when I opened KZbin, and is the one I needed to see!

[@Raulb6728]

Man. This one resonates so much. Everything you said was spot on!. Im married and my wife does this constantly.

[@BeamRider100]

Over time, it makes the man not love her, so it has the opposite effect of reassurance. It's rare to be with a woman and your love increases during the relationship as they do these sabotaging behaviours.

[@JoseRRodriguez]

that remind me BPD traits

[@bigblk45]

My ex wife used to do this all the time. I'd be calm while she kept picking and being really upset until I snapped and raving like a lunatic. She would IMMEDIATELY be fine and whatever the issue was and my calm response that didn't resolve it was suddenly accepted when i was angry and yelling 🙄

[@mauricegiuliani3806]

Sounds tiresome...

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

Most women wanna see that animal side of you…..some do it because they’re use to toxic relationships others because it’s fun for them Best way to give her that animal side is to have rough sex with her and I can ensure she won’t start an argument to see that side

[@rm6857]

but unfortunatelly true, they need drama@@mauricegiuliani3806

[@euridionvult7814]

@@mauricegiuliani3806 Tiresome?! Thats a f00k1n5 sociopath!

[@Ratclan]

Yep. Every fucjin time

[@rushirami]

This is so accurate! This is so freaking accurate! I love this. This is what I felt happened to me several times. I’m glad that now I have a logical explanation of why it happens

[@wmcg2925]

I soo needed to see this video. Because this issue has been a key stressor in life for ages...

[@uoluoluol6045]

Definitely one of the most important relationship skills a man must know. This is in part why stoicism is gets a lot of attention.

[@ronnydelacruzYT]

Yes 👍🏽

[@ezecskornfan]

so we have to not react to a woman breaking our balls?

[@argablarga]

@@ezecskornfan there is such a huge spectrum of toxicity, and a lot of women are toxic and abusive - stay well away from these. There are some who are mildly toxic and you have to assess whether it's worth dealing with their crap. Usually not. And there are some rare women who have a mature outlook on life. These are rarer than unicorns.

[@53strat55]

@@argablarga Totally agree after having lots of experience in dating. Then the other thing is you have to feel actually attracted to those unicorns cuz believe me. I have met unicorns, I'm good looking, I train, only downside is my finance but I get a good share of attention if I put myself out there. Met great more traditional women, actually 3 in the last 5 years. I regret one, the other 2 I simply did not feel attracted too. Its difficult lol, my point is tho. They are still extremely rare and for sure they are not into the dating world, they bussy with other stuf and you lucky if you meet them.

[@rey82rey82]

@@ezecskornfanleave the next day

[@rockkstah2550]

The absence of a woman in one’s life is peace and tranquility.

[@hyperteleXii]

Also existential loneliness.

[@rockkstah2550]

@@hyperteleXii its good and manageable, comes and goes. I’m also productive in my own self development and my spiritual and mental/emotional health, I have hobbies and friends so not completely isolated. It’s working out well.

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

True but look at it from a different viewpoint….her test is to help you gauge your true manhood A lot of guys walking around lying to their self but kids and women will prove how stoic you really are

[@rockkstah2550]

@@user-pp9bl5gr1n stoicism is developed with or without women/kids in one’s life, part of being a man.

[@SwazerSwazers]

@@hyperteleXii Not at all.

[@whatfuckeryisthis-rt8hf]

I was that woman and had no idea why. I'll be apologising today. A million thank yous!!! I love understanding myself better and I've learnt so much from you.

[@pauloshaanker5456]

For what it's worth, I just had to comment because, wow, does this resonate with me! You have explained something, in more detail, that I pretty much already knew. My version of it was simply that when my wife feels badly (tired, a bit under the weather, frustrated or other) she has in innate need to pick a fight with me, or to attack me. I am here to do that for her - to be that for her. She needs it. I hadn't taken my thinking any further than that on the topic. She has done this since the early days of our dating. Another aspect of your talk hit home as well: In recent years I have gotten so tired of arguing with her that sometimes I just say "Whatever." and sort of check out of the argument. I do see the concern in her when I do that, and it's understandable. Thanks for this great video, and also for not being afraid to speak frankly and in a matter of fact way about women. Many folks would not do that today.

[@chrisberlin1552]

DUDE!!! THAT WAS AWESOME!!! Admittedly, I’m 53 and already came to similar conclusions but SO nice to see it put in a video so succinctly. I have a 6 yr old with ex girlfriend and she still works hard to get me angry…but i dont react anymore…which kind of bothers me cause i do still love her. Anyway great work! God bless.

[@JaySmith-pv2mw]

You nailed it, twice. I don't like to make decisions or have important discussions while in an emotional state. I see that as a positive because I don't want to add any more drama or misunderstanding to an already volatile situation. I like to ponder things and make rational decisions. Suffice it to say, women do NOT like or understand that at all. How can you be so calm right now?! Somebody has to be. Also, ladies, men have emotions, feelings, thoughts, opinions, behaviors, moods, ideas, etc. THAT HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. In fact most of those are NOT about you. Listen to the good doctor. When something appears wrong with your man, don't rush in and make him talk. Give him space. Most of the time, the next day he'll be fine. Dudes, don't let women know they can trigger you or upset you. They will use that against you time after time.

[@georgiexyz8137]

Damn homie she was 6' and 250 pounds ?

[@obits3]

Incidentally, this is why women stay with abusive men. To them, the abuse means the man cares (is aware of) about her.

[@Dj.D25]

I've known a few women who were in abusive relationships who became friends with me and we were kind of close. But eventually they created drama or got angry with me for ridiculous reasons, such as having a different opinion, a habit/quirk I had that could use some improvement or I didn't get what they were saying. Basically things not worth ending a friendship or relationship over. It didn't seem to matter that I treated them and loved a few of them better than their exes. I noticed they were quick to cut me off or not want to talk to me for a while when I didn't go along with their game or I put them in their place. And I have questioned why they were willing to put up with the abusive ex longer than they did with me.

[@user-mf1rk3zy3v]

Thanks doc! In my experience this is spot on. I am recently divorced and have found your videos very helpful. I can’t tell how many times my ex would try to pull some kind of emotional response from me to fulfill her own needs.

[@mechawatt7844]

This description is so absolutely true.

[@StarciFanchery]

In essence, indifference is the key... Non-reactiveness to her etc is your greatest strength!!!

[@dukekessler6292]

Indifference and stoicism is the best weapon and defense against women who like to pick fights. It enrages and frightens them.

[@BreezeeGreenz]

Indifference is key. But you should have it before going into a relationship because a woman will sense whether or not you have it. If you have it, she's much less likely to try to provoke a reaction from you. If you don't have it, you're prey to her and when she feels the need to use her superpower of provoking a man's weakness, best believe she'll use it.

[@NeilTruick]

Excellent video! When I ended things with my ex-fiancée a dozen years ago, I told her she (and her kids) could stay in my home until they found another place to live. As it got closer to her move-out date, she began to escalate. I didn't want to add to the stress that was already present. Four days before her move-out, she told me she was going to do something she promised she wouldn't do shortly after we started dating. I reacted; she smiled, almost as if to say, "Gotcha." It turned into an argument, which ended when she uncharacteristically stepped up on me and got in my face. When she did that, I took a deep breath and calmly told her she needed to take two steps back. It was almost like she was daring me to do something. When she didn't move, I was livid, but my expression didn't change and I didn't move. I looked her straight in the eyes and told her again--slower--she needed to take two steps back. After a few moments, she did. She was a couple inches shorter than me (I'm 6'2"), but I outweighed her by at least 100 pounds. There's no way I come out of the situation clean if it goes the other way. That was the moment I was emotionally done with her, but she clearly wasn't done with me because she was still picking fights and inciting conflict almost a year later.

[@user-pp9bl5gr1n]

I’m sure she’s still single and miserable any real women in that situation with 2 kids in your house would try their hardest to make it work

[@PBVader]

She wanted your house while you fought DV charges. The Bible and Islam were right about wahmen. 105 years ago, our simp grandfather's who weren't off to war got it wrong.

[@ActualSighs]

This was a great analysis! My favorite line, "If it's true of people, it's true of women too"

[@clementkhoza6890]

Thank you man, this video sure helped me, I believe I now understand my partner better🙏🏾

[@BlackMasterJoe89]

Fascinating video. When a person truly gives up on someone, they don't feel anything anymore. And when the other person realizes this, it can be very distressing.

[@mmmddd4366]

I always found her more attractive when she showed indifference. Able to be content is attractive.

[@emmalove135]

Sometimes a person doesn’t feel anything for the other person to begin with and when that other person realizes that THAT person truly is using them, that’s when they walk away. ( I had to do this with my second ex- husband. He lacked understanding for the kind of work that I did due to my age and minimal education and he always compared either me or my work with a former partner he once had. He became abusive at times and would apologize and ask for another chance. I asked,” a Chance for what?” And he would reply to “ make it better; c’mon let me make it up to you.” I eventually realized that he would never change and I was not going to do anything that would help him make up his mind to do anything any better than he was already doing and he was just getting by. I eventually divorced him and walked away. I never let him back into my life again. ) 👍👍🎱🦋✨✝️ 8:25

[@HeyMykee]

Of course the other sure way to end a relationship is to keep bringing emotional drama into it and escalating. How about finding someone who's emoptionally secure and doesn't need to constantly pick fights just to shit test you?

[@redpilljesus]

​@@mmmddd4366go see a shrink, my dude.

[@ThorMaximus]

Some guys complain about this behavior from women. I used to as well. It’s better to accept it, understand it, and quite frankly use it to your advantage. It’s beyond amazing how powerful it works when she starts a fight & you can resist engaging that battle. You’ll never win, because it’s not about being right. You can have absolute irrefutable evidence that she can’t refute, and she’ll just change what she’s fighting with you about faster than you can keep up & will change all facts - even ones she previously agreed were true - to whatever suits her argument. The best weapon is to let her argue & fight with…. Herself. Let her mind & imagination work against herself. Whatever she comes up with will be far more powerful than anything we’ll actually say/do.

[@thebesttheworst2277]

... That middle paragraph 👌👏💯👏 'Moving the goalposts' until she is somehow back to being the victim, even if every shred of logic and evidence shows her as the wrongdoer.

[@anisenkrill6179]

This is the way.

[@rrmackay]

There is a much less stressful solution, tell her to her face that this argument is a waste of my time and walk away.

[@Plans4YouJer2911]

The end result Now she wants a divorce Nuts

[@rrmackay]

@@Plans4YouJer2911 Thats going to happen anyway, the only question is do you preserve your self respect and sanity before it happens.

[@adamjuneau6287]

Oh that's gold doc, absolute gold

[@exceptionallife4768]

This man is extremely accurate with this message

[@allenmciver1888]

This is why, in dating, the best response to a ShIt Test from a woman is no response. "Can we go back to being normal now?"

[@JJ-wi2uw]

You can either love women or understand women; it's VERY difficult to do both.

[@robbythecuban]

What he said, it is absolutely, positively, 100% true. I have explained this exact principle many times, in a different way, to various other men. And I have applied it successfully in my own life. Indifference is the best thing.