Why Your Stepkids Don't Celebrate You On Mother's Day

[@lisavanderwaa4302]

Mother's Day is super hard for me. Thank you for this video. It is always so helpful to step into someone else's shoes and realize things from their perspective.

[@jamiescrimgeour]

So glad it helped Lisa!

[@carolynward3363]

I never “expect” a celebration. My step daughter is 5 and I have been around since she was 1.5. However my partner always writes me a sweet note saying his appreciation for everything i do for her. I am involved in her school/daycare and they are wonderful and always give her the option to make me an item if she wishes. To my surprise last year she was so excited to gift me her present she made me. This year since she is out of school i have made a valiant effort to fill the school gift void and have organized some things for her to make her mom as keepsakes :) we all may not always get along but she deserves to give her mom something when she sees her that day.

[@jamiescrimgeour]

I love this! Thanks so much for sharing Carolyn! I hope you have the best Mothers Day weekend, no matter what it looks like!

[@hecallsmefancy]

I have a very loving, caring, selfless husband... Thank God! He makes sure all of our children celebrate me on Mother’s Day and everyday. For them not to do so would never be ok with him. If you are being left out, speak up because you deserve the love and effort!

[@kaylaempson5788]

I say “Happy Mother’s Day” to both my mom and my stepmom. I also say “Happy Father’s Day” to both my dad and my step dad. I don’t think that biology determines whether or not you are someone’s “real parent”. It’s the love, dedication, and actions that show whether or not you are their parent. And I don’t think that needs to be exclusive. If a step mom or dad doesn’t want to fill the parental role, then they can choose that and choose to not be included with the parenting responsibilities and celebratory holidays associated with that. But if I have a step parent who is putting in just as much love and work (maybe sometimes more) as my biological parent, they are for sure getting the celebration they deserve on Mother or Father’s Day.

[@christichristi-veganeater]

gotta love you. pretty much, endlessly

[@steelcity1momo]

On Mother’s Day I just focus on my mom & mother in law rather then trying to include myself on that day .

[@jamiescrimgeour]

I hope you have a great day doing that!!! Thanks for commenting Monique!

[@alisonleigh100]

I never expected my step son to celebrate me on Mother’s Day. But I did expect my husband to celebrate me on Mother’s Day for being a step mom to his child and helping him raise his child. When I didn’t get that special acknowledgment from him in the beginning I told him how that made me feel, and he had not even thought about it. So once I explained it to him, now he does give me some sort of special appreciation on Mother’s Day 🙂

[@Abster-323]

Mother’s Day is ALWAYS hard because I haven’t been able to have kids of my own and that’s heartbreaking every year. This year the kids have been with us full time and Bio mom will be coming to see them for Mother’s Day which will be hard also. 💔 Can you talk about step Mother’s Day? I know it’s not official but I’ve heard about it, id maybe love to have it celebrated but idk how to go about it . Thanks for your videos!

[@jamiescrimgeour]

Hey Abby! YES!!! it is even more difficult for those struggling with that. Ugh it's so challenging. Heather Stewart and I just did a podcast episode about Infertility in Stepmoms - it was a really good conversation. To be honest, I've never celebrated Step-Mother's Day but I know it's a great tradition for a lot of stepmoms. If you want to start doing something it may be something to talk to your partner about?! Stepmom Magazine also has some good content on Step Mother's Day that may help!

[@stickerlady1774]

Abigail!!! You aren’t alone, honey!!!!!

[@Worley_Farm_n_Flower]

You're videos are so helpful. I'm on year 7 and step moming has only got worse. Thank you for providing me with tips to handle it!

[@emsoup6270]

You know, I don't even bother with stressing about this day, but imagine my surprise when my elder stepson handed me a flowerpot he painted and told me it was his Mother's Day gift to me. It was so sweet. I have also recently heard that there is a Stepmother's Day! (I believe it falls on the Sunday after Mother's Day, so no conflict there :)

[@jamiescrimgeour]

Yes there is! i didn't know about it until a few years in! That's so sweet about the flower pot. Thanks so much for sharing :)

[@christichristi-veganeater]

dying inside...wishing

[@victoriadecker4224]

On Mother’s Day I don’t get upset about it I understand it’s a day for the bio mother however my step children decide to include me on Mother’s Day they make me things and pick out stuff for me and tell me happy Mother’s Day but only because they want to, also they live with their dad and I not there mother but still call their bio mother too and they love having two mothers it’s a blessing ☺️

[@beckers091]

I'm a bio mom and I feel like this. It seems like the pressure is on to make sm feel special and included, which I'm all for, but I feel like I get lost in translation, I'm JUST the bio mom

[@jamiescrimgeour]

Thank you so much for sharing that.. I'd LOVE to hear more about your perspective on that if you're interested in sharing! Shoot me an email [e-mail] - I think it's SO important to hear both sides. It's crazy how two people can experience the very same thing in two different ways!

[@jeanne_guitton]

I don't get anything from my stepsons on Mother's Day, and I don't expect anything. In fact I am secretly glad that they don't give me anything. I am not their mother, and I don't want to be their mother. I don't even like their mother, but she loves them and they love her, and she deserves to be celebrated by them on that day. I fully support that and encourage them to prepare their gifts for her when they are with us (same for her birthday). Their relationship with me is different and doesn't have to infringe on her day. They celebrate my birthday, they give me gifts for Christmas and even Easter, but Mother's Day is for their mother. I think we all kind of like it that way. Also, I have a close friend whose kids give gifts to their stepmum on Mother's Day and it really hurts my friend, because she accepts that the stepmum plays a motherly role, but feels that special child-mother bond should be reserved for her. While I personally think she should not take it too personally and not give her kids grief over it, I understand that wish. Sorry for the long post. Just discovered your channel, and it's a godsent (despite the fact that my stepsons are actually pretty loving and awesome overall :-)).

[@christichristi-veganeater]

just stop

[@emmagoulter3122]

My step kids ( two boys aged 12 & 10) their mum passed away in 2015 from a car crash, i dont know anyone else i can relate to in my step situation.... my kids are a son 12 & daughter 6 , & i get mothers day with them , while at the same time , im concious that the step kids are grieving....its a really hard situation & theres no handbook to "know how to do this)

[@stickerlady1774]

Could be worse and she could still be alive.

[@kristin2585]

It's the reverse on my end she gets the flowers and such I get nothing I got my first card in years last year because of her asking what did I get

[@osmannisha9176]

Goodness me what did I get myself in 😭

[@emmaleebuzzard1023]

We celebrate it, but out of three children, two are biologically mine. Normally, my middle daughter is with her Mom on the day so I haven’t had to worry about it as much as others. Edited to add: I think my stepdaughter will not openly celebrate it with me when she is older because her Mother is very anti me. :/ But I, in some respects, have just accepted this.

[@victoriadecker4224]

Emmalee Buzzard it’s okay I’ve had a similar experience in the past when they were toddlers and now that my step kids have gotten a little older they celebrate Mother’s Day with me and do things for me...just give it time I promise one day they will make that decision on their own to celebrate with you especially if you have a good solid relationship with them they will definitely acknowledge and appreciate you when their older on Mother’s Day

[@LevRiv]

I like to say that my step mum isn’t taking away Mother’s Day from my mother, I don’t celebrate the holiday because my mother wasn’t very good at parenting so I forget the holiday exists. I do have a step-mum and my dad expects me to see her as a mother figure when I say I feel like I don’t have one. She treats me differently, it’s like sarcasm and babying at the same time and I know she didn’t talk to her bio daughter that way when she was my age. I confront her about it (keep in mind she knows she’s my only chance of a mother figure) and she starts crying and says “your not my kid though, you know what I mean?” But then once her oldest daughter screws up she disconnects from her she finally sees me a one of ‘her kids’ wtf, I’m not going to just be your family based on if you get along with all your children or not. this whole blended family stuff is bs. She’s not my mum, she’s simply my dads partner. That’s all it is that’s all the relationship we have in our family and that’s all it will ever be.

[@killeenryan7284]

In regular life do you call the kids step kids, or just your kids? What is correct? What is hard for me on Mother's day is that I have lost 3 babies and couldn't have my own, then I have 3 step kids. All girls, they do actually do something for me on Mother's day but it is still hard for me. Since they are not mine. SO many mixed emotions.

[@ashleyeoff9232]

Last Mother’s Day I received my first gift that my step kids and mother gifted me. It was a mug that read “go ask your dad” ... was this a nasty subliminal message because she knows how involved I am in their lives. Plus, she got a heads up from the kids that I had took them to get her something .. which was just a card that they could gift her from THEM.

[@jamiescrimgeour]

Hmmmmm! I don't know I can totally see how you're like hmmmmmmm!?!?

[@ashleyeoff9232]

Jamie Scrimgeour yea shes really nasty and has crossed many boundaries so this gesture couldn’t have been a sincere one. 😂 I laugh it off.

[@nomonde6832]

I'm sorry for your experience, you're a great mom. Keep doing what you're doing🤗

[@jamiescrimgeour]

Ladies! Would love to hear your experience with Mother's Day as a stepmom! Do you celebrate or no?

[@DaughterofJesustheChrist]

Hated it. I get nothing from these ungrateful little worms. Their mom died and boohoo I lost my mom and step dad and alot of my family. I'm just happy I have my two kids and one on the way. I just don't want to waste anymore time on ungrateful people. My husband wants me to keep trying but I've had enough. They are just lazy leeches that I don't want in my damn life. What I need to know is how to get rid of them 😂

[@wendylinkem6201]

Never celebrated mother's day. To me it was just another day.

[@yadaddysugarbaby]

@@DaughterofJesustheChrist You're my spirit animal. That's how I feel sometimes. Even though its not a popular opinion

[@earthangel3108]

You are a mom. Why can’t you be celebrated? I don’t get it. My ex-boyfriends kids said Happy Mother’s Day to me on Mother’s Day. It was really surprising and warmed my heart. They were only 6 and 7. My SO now who has an 8 year old. I have no idea what it will be like. We are talking about getting married. I don’t know if I even want to deal with it. I had a chance to date someone with no kids. I picked my SO instead. Sometimes I regret it with all the horrible feelings comes. I did everything right and I have no respect, no kids, 41 and I hate my life now after a year. He is so sucky at having my back.

[@averygolden6779]

or they just dont like you ://

[@johnblue8029]

I’m 32 lol My step mom can be a bitch lol I known her since I was 15. My dad’s a really good guy chill calm and easy-going and friendly. Some yours I give her Mother’s Day card saying happy Mother’s Day. Some years I don’t give a shit lol Some years I just give her a celebration card. I constantly mind fuck the shit out of her haha Let’s be real about the situation. My step mom doesn’t know how to minor in business and she overstep boundaries. So it’s hard to deal with. After today I’m like fuck IT lol 😂