Will I De-Transition at 40?

[@singingblueberry]

Other people have mentioned this already, but getting angrier due to testosterone hrt is not a guarantee! From what I've heard, most transmasc people on T have rather gotten happier and less dysphoric, which calms down anger issues. I just don't want transmasc people to turn down potentially life-saving treatment because they're scared of something that is mostly a misconception.

[@zetjet9901]

Yeah, I did not get less empathetic/sympathetic either, nor did I begin to feel emotions less deeply. Just my experience, of course, but then I’ve also not seen any studies that adequately back up a lot of the common claims about emotion on HRT.

[@limaxim]

Thank u!!! I’m a trans man who got significantly less temperamental on T, it was progesterone that turned me into a raging demon from PMDD and T fixed all of that for me.

[@gamer3ed484]

T probably does cause all sorts of emotional/mental problems…for trans women, but not trans men. Similarly, E can be lifesaving and emotionally calming for trans women, but not trans men. I’ve heard lots of trans women describe T as a “poison” that they are glad to be rid of. And that’s perfectly valid for them. On the same token, I’ve browsed some transmasc subreddits mainly just to educate myself on what that experience is like, and I’ve seen endless posts about how much better mental clarity and emotional health is after transition for them, just like it is for a majority of transfemmes. It’s kinda dumb to boil the whole discussion down to “T=angry and bad” when that’s far from the case.

[@alexelion7084]

Thanks, this actually scared me a bit, even though I probably won’t ever go on T since I’m nonbinary/genderfluid. Guess I was a bit concerned that me being caring and feeling emotions very deeply (which is something I like about myself) was me being „a girl“ or at least related to having a feminine body (which I don’t like) and this was making me uncomfortable. Thanks for cleaning this up!

[@Fueled_by_Tea]

For me, Ive always been slow to anger pre HRT (FTM) . I'm a very calm person, and that hasn't changed but I find that I have less patience. Ive been in therapy for over a decade so when I start to loose that patience I easily calmed myself down. i get introspective to figure out the reason why Im frustrated and communicate it well. The only trouble I had with the changes it libido which was already high pre T but eventually that calms down also. But my favorite change is I have far more confidence, which Icky touched on with personality changes.

[@junoestro]

the exact second you turn 40, all of the girl juice pours out of your ears

[@hardyorange]

Wow, hrt really changes how you orgasm!

[@Khotetsu]

"If you feel liquid running down your neck, relax, lie on your back, and apply immediate pressure to your temples. You are simply experiencing a rare reaction in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have emancipated the ear tubes inside your head- I mean, girl juice."

[@hucool323]

If you feel liquid running Down your neck, check your age! If you’re 40, it’s just the excess girl juice. If you’re not, then god speed to you

[@Joel-u3y]

I've never seen girl-juice pour out their ears.... it tends to ooze from a different orifice

[@AnnaCurser]

then i might as well be dead already

[@Kari_Jane]

I started at 49 two years ago... and am living my best fem life it can be done for sure and is very doable

[@namtellectjoonal7230]

that's awesome, so happy for you

[@playstationremy299]

That’s great, makes me hopeful that I will make it past my 20s❤

[@nathanbernards]

6 months ago for me, I'm 41 😊

[@Kari_Jane]

@@playstationremy299 you can do it! You are stronger than you know 🧡

[@darkphoenix06660]

If only I could afford to...

[@GoldBean2752]

For being bisexual, I sit very straight personally.

[@Sylverfysh02]

how

[@KeepTheAngerFlowing]

HOW?!? TEACH ME!!!!!

[@Inaufospotter]

The bisexual council fortold about a bisexual long ago... who would bring allignement to spine while sitting down as they woukd teach us how..... i laughed as it seemd like an obsured notion at the time... because as we all know it's biologically impossible for bisexuals to sitt straight... i see know the error of my ways.

[@MeIsGurlNow]

How can you sit straight? i have never been able to 🙂

[@tfk_001]

as someone with scoliosis........ yeah........

[@alekseitheandor]

I'm 21, and I have been considering transitioning for over a year now...... I think the time has come.... idk if I have the strength to face what is coming.... but all I can do is try and live how I want to live, wish me luck in the coming fight

[@mikeuk666]

Never let anyone influence yourself though. Only you know

[@casteanpreswyn7528]

Whatever your decision, just know people support you and that you know best for you.

[@casteanpreswyn7528]

@mikeuk666 okay, this is weird and completely unrelated to the topic at hand. However, you commented before me, and I even saw your reply before I typed mine but for some reason KZbin sent me a notification for this initial reply. What is going on?! Lol

[@hardyorange]

You've got this!!! You say you're prepared for a fight, and it might indeed be tough where you are, but you'll probably experience way MORE joy and happiness as you transition!!! Tbf, I haven't tried getting on hrt myself, but I gained so many meaningful relationships just by coming out as nb, and my friends who are on hrt, both estrogen- and testosterone-based, are all approximately a billion times happier than they were before they started their transition. Yeah, the economy sucks and transphobes exist, but that would still be true even if you don't transition; my friends have partners and even spouses, host parties and even local events, and even just chill at home while existing as themselves, and all of them have said that the only thing they'd change about their transition would be to do it sooner just so they could have more time lived as themselves. Good luck!!!

[@maowtm]

​@@casteanpreswyn7528 "eventual consistency"

[@RK-wz4cc]

Ashley with Tom Scott moment

[@Banter07]

“I am in f1nn5ter’s basement”

[@Blasulz1234]

such a missied opportunity on the editors side to put in a clip of tom scott

[@mikymuky1171]

that went through my head as well xD

[@stormerne]

I started HRT as my 71st birthday present to myself. It’s never too late! Did you know: you can inject subcutaneously instead of intramuscular-I find it far less traumatic. And progesterone acts as a T-blocker. Thank you, Icky, for all your hard work! 🥰

[@daniellalloyd1082]

Yay!! I hope things have improved for you since your birthday hun :D

[@fiusdhviusdhvkhsj]

Prog is a mild T production blocker. However it may also do the opposite: it can be converted to androstenedione and then to testosterone, in some cases.

[@stormerne]

Thank you. I am just relaying what my doctor told me. I’ve no doubt there’s nuance.

[@mydreamsnow4135]

Hi! I'm 69 years old and deeply thinking about DIY HRT. I've had gender dysphoria my entire life and I just want to feel what it's like to experience the healing effects HRT has on dysphoria. How soon did you begin to feel changes mentally? Amber

[@stormerne]

Hello Amber

[@sagemcmichael8320]

I think it's a really common misconception that taking testosterone as a trans man makes you more angry but that hasn't been my experience at all. My anger feels different with a testosterone brain than it did with an estrogen brain, for sure, but I would say I was a much more angry person before hrt. I wouldn't say testosterone makes you angrier, you just experience anger differently. I do think that just the act of transitioning for ppl that wanna transition will make you generally less angry bc there's so much more joy

[@reindeerdashie]

I think a lot of it has to do with the brain being frustrated from running on the wrong fuel. I'm transfem and I'm a lot less angry and frustrated in general running on E as opposed to running on T. When your brain gets the hormones it expects, you become calmer. ❤

[@aradanat231]

@@reindeerdashie Well, people's minds react in a different way, I think. In my case transfeminine hrt allowed me to feel ANY emotions different than misery, like joy, happiness, but also anger. I've been pretty numb before I started it, HRT basically worked as an antidepressant, with the difference that it actually worked on me.

[@Zoey_the_Rat]

Well, I can say that I'm a lot less bloodthirsty in my anger on E

[@Cavi587]

Yeah, I guess the "anger" from testosterone is not even comparable to the anger and sadness you feel when you're in a body that doesn't feel like your own.

[@tubester4567]

All the studies say most trans people stop hormones after a few years and most will still have dysphoria and mental health problems.. There is a strong established link between hormones and cancer. Even when taking hormones that match your sex, There are medical warnings about HRT for menopausal women. It raises your risk of cancer and women are told to not take it for more than a couple of years, because it also leads to dementia in women . Many doctors wont even prescribe HRT to menopausal women because of the health risks, and even the doctors that do, wont prescribe it when a woman is in her late 50's because of the dementia link. The older a woman is, the higher her risk of dementia. Straight males cant even get testosterone from doctors when they are very affective at building muscle, because of the health risks. Gym junkies who buy it illegally have anger/rage/emotional problems, their genitals shrink, they get heart problems and other problems. There is a lot of established science about the health risks of hormones even when the hormones match your sex. There is no way it could be safe for the wrong sex. Young people (children) who take hormone blockers then hormones are at very high risk of serious health problems like osteoperosis, stunted growth, heart defects. Many countries are banning hormone blockers now for children. Children who go through blockers then hormones will never experience an orgasm. Jazz Jennings will never experience an orgasm.

[@net5ke]

Ashley always looks so pretty :')

[@bellarosethorne]

personality changing is a weird one, because it's not even entirely down to HRT. some of it is just down to you having the freedom to change and just completely changing the variables you are living under: if your circumstances, your worries, your confidence, etc. all change.. your personality will change with them.

[@DamonXWind]

I started HRT 3 weeks ago and now I like pickles and started watching One Piece so it's safe to say it's over for me

[@MarcinLutnia]

Gg

[@Vultariev]

Don't start drinking monster and cuddling up to a blahaj.

[@DamonXWind]

@@Vultariev that's been going on for years

[@Vultariev]

@@DamonXWind I'm sorry, I can't help you. You're too far gone lol.

[@Meyechanel]

Lmfao. Tissue purchases are new expense. Going through like pack one per arc.

[@MB-ub5ns]

I can see why Fin is so captivated by her 🥰

[@timdoe8895]

As it is written. Icky has never failed to crack an egg. She is simply incapable of missing.

[@rudymelo880]

I knew I was probably trans when I first saw her tik tok and IG when she started dating finn. I saw her with her E patches on and body and I was jealous. Also, I was taking notes on her transition tips "just in case" and thought Id try E before I die. Probably 2 months later I hopped on the sauce 😂

[@angelsideuk6197]

You could says shes eggcilent at reading people

[@chrishart8548]

​@rudymelo880 If I could do it and jump to where icky is now I would. I've lost my hair now so that's another reason among many I won't transition.

[@pablopereyra7126]

"It is written, only LINK can defeat GANON"

[@kongqianfu]

​@@chrishart8548 my hair's starting to go, and that's what finally made me seriously consider transitioning. There's a feeling of wanting to do it before it's "too late" but in every account I hear, from trans people who transitioned late in life, there's this sense that it's never too late, and they enjoy their new life into old age. I hope no matter what road you take, you find your peace, friend.

[@stoyanfourn]

Man and woman are a lot closer than you think! This is the essence of everything. It is something I personally didn't know or think until recently. We should educate ourselves on these themes. My wife and I underwent two IVF procedures and the final was a success. Before we went to the in vitro clinic, I underwent some infertility treatment, by taking testosterone for a few months, in the form of Undestor and Proviron. The only change I got was that I grew more body hair. No fertility, my sperm count was very poor. And I never grew any muscles. Not now, not when I was a young boy or adolescent. And I've been thinking recently, that it could be possible that I am myself with gender dysphoria. I've never felt quite a man throughout my life, and from a very young age I dreamed of becoming a girl. I didn't even know what sex was at that time, probably when I was in the 1st grade or kindergarten. I am not that type of person who has any suicidal thoughts and feeling disgusted by his own genitalia, but still... I don't feel quite comfortable in the male role. Although I am now married with a child, it took me a long time. During which I questioned myself what was wrong with me.

[@UwUImTheo]

You have no idea how lucky you are that you have no physical dysphoria

[@DrJaneLuciferian]

I'm 54 and transitioned 19 years ago, and the changes really always continue. You do hit a plateau. but that plateau actually slopes upwards to more secondary sex changes and reinforcement. It's a wonderful thing to experience even after 19 years :^)

[@EvilAng3la]

I started at 23, and am 49 now. And yeah, they never stop, just you see fewer and slower. I had another round of breast growth in the last 5 years, for example. I just recently realized how much my thinking has become more "emotional", and has been that way for a while. The extended youthful appearance from HRT is still there, happily looking young for my age, but I'm seeing those signs of aging - and they're all feminine in nature because of being on estrogen. The changes in awareness and acceptance of trans people has re-awakened my own connection with my transness, and I'm finally able to recognize all the positives in it, but in the end I can say that more than anything, I'm a middle-aged woman now. (And how that would blow the mind of my teenage self as he fell asleep in tears sad he wasn't a girl)

[@DrJaneLuciferian]

@@EvilAng3la I'm so with you. If I could go back in time and talk to my teen self I'd easily allay my fears then. Aging as trans is really ok and with the slightly manic early days over I can just relax in peace, lol

[@Vilemk0]

I'm 34 and jumping in now. Haven't started but will be picking up my perscription tomorrow. I've always feared it was too late and I'm too old now and that I'll never pass but I'll try my best.

[@DrJaneLuciferian]

@@Vilemk0 Well, I started at 35. I actually fought against it for 20 years believing that it would ruin my life, most because of all the lies society taught us, like the crass jokes and misogyny of our patriarchal world. But, feeling desperate I finally jumped in and it totally changed my life. I finally felt young again, and looked it as well. It really does take several years off. Even now in my 50's I'm happy with how I look, and I haven't had ffs. Everyone has to decide for themselves what best for them, but from talking to hundreds of other trans people who started later I've only seen regret in a couple, who bought into the lies and stereostyles anti-trans people sold them. Everyone else is happier after transition. Good luck :^)

[@Vilemk0]

@@DrJaneLuciferian Thank you for sharing. I wish I had mentors like you years ago.

[@NixBuffaloBill]

I just enjoy Ashley's voice

[@jesytompkins8529]

Agreed... Very soothing 😊😊😊

[@tifskrans4464]

Same

[@Sheriff_K]

I love her mannerisms, they’re just so.. appealing for some reason? 😍😳🧐🙈

[@Mew0690]

I can only hope to have a beautiful better voice too someday

[@Mnngrrburger]

its forced tho trans people usually practice their voices

[@Aliyta7868]

This channel has helped me understand and process these "weird" feelings and has helped me feel more confident in "cracking the egg." Now most of my friends support my transition and I can hopefully take the next step in becoming the women I was meant to be! Keep up the good work!

[@Keysieofficial]

Just wanna say Thank you, Thank you so much. I was so confused about who I was until I found your videos, you have helped me find who I am, and that's pretty cool. I just started HRT 9 days ago and I am excited and interested to see whats ahead on this journey. Thank you

[@Ellieh6049]

I'm 37 this year and been on HRT 3 months, I sure as heck ain't stopping in a few years! Love your videos Ashley ♥️

[@jesytompkins8529]

I 💯 agree with you there... I just turned 40 in January myself & i have been on HRT for nearly two years now. I can categorically say de-transitioning is not & will never be on the cards. I have never been happier 😊😊❤😊😊

[@Mew0690]

You go girlys 💖

[@jesytompkins8529]

@@Mew0690 ❤️❤️❤️🥰❤️❤️❤️

[@Mew0690]

@@jesytompkins8529 wanna be friends girly

[@ThisWontEndWell]

After about seven years of cellular replication, you're an entirely new collection of cells, inside and out... so, after seven years you have cells that are all influenced by increased levels of estrogen.

[@eligah1843]

That’s a myth, not all of your cells are different every 7 years. Neuron count doesn’t change at all because they don’t split

[@hollytalmage]

The funny thing is that I think they were talking about menopause after fourty, as though HRT isn't used to treat menopause

[@electronics-girl]

The funny thing is that I'm going through female puberty at the same time that cis women my age are going through menopause.

[@AlovicGrim]

I must say, I adore you, as a person, as a woman, as a guide through the transitioning, You just give off such a relaxed and lovely vibe, that just radiates positivity. resulting in causing me to smile while watching your works.uwu Never stop being you, and keep on being the you you want to be! :D

[@lolmoomin]

thankyou for this, the main thing thats fighting me on my decision is my male pattern baldness and worrying about that. hearing that it might not get worse or even posibly get better is *so much* i'ma go cry now

[@Phix_uk]

Huge amount of respect for you Ashley , Just in the process of getting hrt at 42 and it's so nice to hear such positivity

[@ChrissiX]

Started HRT @ 50 (2 years ago) - icky does extremely good descriptions of the potential effects - your milage may vary :)

[@UltraPrimal]

0:11 "I'm in Weldon Spring. I'm in Gävle. I'm in the abandoned city of Pripyat. I'm inside one of the Inchindown oil tanks... I am in an airplane bathroom. I am in an unpowered glider. I am in Iceland..." For people who get the reference 😆

[@tmmaster6904]

"Behind me is lake constance, it is a big lake"

[@SnowLily06]

I love this

[@Zoey_the_Rat]

"when you call your dnd group to play"

[@TheJovada]

“I’m in Hull”

[@mittfh]

While this entire video series could count as Things You Might Not Know. Maybe one day, Ashley will be Internet Notable enough to be invited onto Lateral...

[@carlosandleon]

„I don’t think there will be a return journey, Mr. Frodo“

[@KwikBR]

😭

[@Hardymovies]

8:42 🔥⚔️ Ickia, Progenitor of the Shattered Egg ⚔️🔥

[@hammerth1421]

I think she has the wrong boss music though. Needs to be this one kzbin.info/www/bejne/m3rTe6CardODZ6c

[@casteanpreswyn7528]

I need this as a MtG card.

[@saratoga6663]

*extremely tragic strings play*

[@thesteadingoffranya4423]

I began my transition at 53 and i have noticed many of the effects of HRT that you brought up and I am so grateful for the hair thing lol. The most bizzare changer I noticed was a change in taste not appetite (though that happened too.) I was a huge fan of red meat specifically i could never pass on a steak when offered (understand for the purposes of beef consumption I live in Alberta, Canada, so think Texas U.S.A but less guns and more beer) Now I would rather chicken than beef (not that i would turn down a nice steak someone else was buying lol) I just started ordering chicken far more often. Also the harshest change i noticed was my sense of smell became far more impactful. I smoked cigarettes for 35 years and quit on doc's orders in '14 and since i started my transition in '19 the smell of tobacco smoke, particularly stale tobacco smoke makes me gag to almost retching. While prior to HRT I would have told you there was no smell of stale tobacco in my home. Within two weeks of starting HRT I had to rewash every piece of cloth in my home several times and even replaced my couch cushions to get the smell of cigarettes out and this was 5 years after I quit smoking. Another thing. As a person that is almost a senior what i have noticed is there is a lot more apathy towards others differences the older you get (unless you try to push something on them (then you encounter a level of stubborn bordering on the levels of Canadian Geese. lol)). Not saying any more or less acceptance, they just don't have the emotional energy left to care enough to say anything. (not including religious fanatics of all stripes). As for passing that is not even an option for me but I also don't try to be anything other than a trans feminine person and everyone accepts me for being feminine. What i do try to do is, "lady like" behaviour, but that is an emotional and action thing not how I my face or body is built. I won't speak for anyone else on this but I transitioned so I could find a way to love myself. How I appear to others and what those others might think of me is a reflection of them not me.

[@Skyfloats72]

I started at 49, haven't looked back since, am happy just being myself.

[@Kari_Jane]

Heyyyy starting at 49 gang! Me too :) and saaame I’m so happy now I’m two years in

[@dolson27]

Started transitioning at 41, started HRT at 42 about one year ago. I pretty much always get read as female, and most people seem a little surprised to learn that I'm trans. I'm happier than I've ever been.

[@dolson27]

@@idfklol3181 You might start by searching for trans meetups in your area. Odds are really good that you'll find people willing to help you get started, or at least point you in the right direction. That would also be a great place to try presenting how you prefer in public, if you're comfortable with it.

[@Skyfloats72]

@idfklol3181 Hi, as far as I know there is no easy way in the UK. I spent 7 years waiting for the NHS, then went to Gender GP, and then 2.5 years later, I finally got on with the NHS. So in total took me 9.5 years.

[@amandaburleson2035]

i started at 9 months old and now im 4 years old and happy bieng myself

[@DiamondAviator4]

I see a transition as accepting what is and being yourself :3 That’s how I see it.

[@juliaobernesser349]

6:37 That surprisingly hit pretty hard. My Doctor and I are baffled but after 3 years on HRT, my body is reverting back to the way it was. I guess it must be pretty rare, as I haven't heard of this happening to anyone else. I hope this doesn't come off as an "Um actually", but rather a different perspective. Great video all the same!

[@xanderblackmist5528]

Honestly, I needed this more optimistic take on things today. Im 2 months in, feeling generally great about my transition thus far, and I have no intention or desire to stop, but the presence of those who, even within the trans community, seem so hopeless gets ot me some times. Not in a way of like "they should stop sharing" or anything like that, but like I feel for them in a way that ive never really felt before and its kind of overwhelming to feel and some times that pulls my mood down. I love all my fellow trans brothers sisters and enby sibblings yall are all beautiful/handsome (take whichever you like best or both or infer a different descriptor if you prefer all are valid imo :) ) and I want all the best for all of you. I realize this may not reach any significant amount of people cause who the hell am I but a random person making a youtube comment but I hope it makes at least someone smile like this video made me smile.

[@breegrimm7142]

I didn't even start taking HRT until I was 46. I'm 49 now and people keep thinking I am in my 30s! HRT is magic. Also, you can still get pretty significant changes even at my age. For example, I am now a D-Cup without surgery!

[@Zeequals]

"Lets see how bisexual I can sit" *sits exactly like me* "This is ridiculous"

[@Definitely_C_Maybe]

Even though I'm 3.5 years on HRT I still learned a lot from this video. Thank you so much Icky!!!

[@empressadria7009]

I started transitioning at 35. I'm turning 43 on Saturday and I'm happier than I ever have been before transitioning. I'll never go back.

[@saraCFUSA]

I started in Dec 2022 at 35… 15 months on HRT and socially transitioned I’ve never been this happy.

[@kuposamurai6045]

Icky is definitely the final boss of cracking eggs. I'd heard about Finnster years ago but never looked into him until I saw a super cute selfie of Icky and Finnster together, and that's when I realized I can't stay in the closet anymore. I've known I was trans for a long time but went back in the closet and was in denial, but Icky (and Finnster) have helped me so much these last few months in coming to terms with myself and what I really want out of life. Thank you so much ICKY!

[@everythinggaming643]

I freaking loves those short bits at the very end :D

[@helenlawson8426]

Loved the video and as an old-ish trans woman I laughed at that idea we'll get more masculine as we age. I transitioned at 40 some 17 years ago with my surgery now 12 years ago this month... we settle into our bodies and it all just gets better over time. Last month I posed for a naked portrait painting... yeah me a woman with anxiety who as a kid hated their body so much it would always be covered up. Transitioning is scary, it's messy and beautiful, a journey where you finally get to decide on the destination. One part of hormones even some GPs forget is that we all have our own sensitivity to estrogen & testosterone. It's why one dosage level doesn't suit all. Blood tests are so important. I'm extremely sensitive to estrogen and my progesterone can create even more of it. If my levels get to high we just play with the dosage and type of hormones I take.

[@azuquirtle]

She says that the way she was sitting was ridiculous, then immediately goes back to sitting like that unironically. Honestly quite incredible

[@Lexiyeon]

Thank you for speaking about the scary parts. 80+ days in hrt and things already feel so much better. I use the gel and no issues so far.

[@loki2655]

Icky, the mother hen of transitioning....or the Loki carrying the eggs back from the shop....the latter is less relaxed and more pavementy though 😂

[@tyranitararmaldo]

I've just started laser, and it feels so comforting to watch your videos as I am starting my transition

[@Suzie-Maude]

As a new socially trans woman (2 months ago), I just want to thank you for your channel, your beautiful look and voice. I'm sure 40 years won't be a problem for you. I am a 73 years old trans girl, lesbian and radical feminist and you just can't imagine how much my life as a women is a real rebirth... and I have been accepted by at least 150 cis persons of all ages in my neighborhood as being Suzie now. Thanks again and continue your funny and useful videos... Love from Québec City, Canada

[@theejackalope]

I want to thank you about talking about the medical side for a moment. Im really scared of medical issues for some reason so hearing that it would be just the normal possible medical stuff really helps.

[@casteanpreswyn7528]

Abigail Thorn has a great video about her transition and the medical problems associated with it. It is specific to the UK, but could help you understand the possibilities.

[@jesytompkins8529]

Don't let the bad stuff scare you off, it's a bit like if you have a headache do not Google the symptoms as it will fill your head with anxiety & lead you to believe it's more serious than a normal headache. I did something similar myself with the possible size effects. But I can now say after being 2 years into my transition, you will have blood tests every month for the first 3 months & then every 3 months thereafter & these will be checked by the drs & the team looking after you at the GIC (Gender Identity Clinic). This will be an appointment either face to face or via video where they will go through your results & hormone levels with you & make changes as & when needed. The level of care you get alongside your transitioning journey is great so please don't be too scared. If anything you will be more likely to spot body problems more regularly than the average person due to these regular blood tests 😊😊. Also while considering transitioning put your name on the waiting list I wish someone told me to do this due to the UK waiting list being over 5 years. I finally put my name down when I was 33 & couldn't start my transition journey till I was 38 due to the long waiting list. You can always turn down the appointment if you change your mind along the way but you cannot shorten the waiting from the date you put yourself on the list. I hope this helps give you some reassurances 😊

[@rebeccasam3434]

I don't know if you'd be going on E ot T, but personally I'd recommend not trying spiro if you're trans fem. Oh, and use bio-identical hormones-the alleged dangers were from non-bio-identical stuff. But otherwise yeah, e and t dominance just flip your risk profiles. I was scared, but so farso good, and it cleared up tons of medical issues for me....though ymmv and of course a cis person going on it would CAUSE all sorts of problems since they're not wired for it.

[@rpgnc]

I will say, im ftm and from my exprience regarding personality t calmed me down, made me enjoy physical activities a lot more... there were lots of other changes but i think those were mostly due to not being crazy depressed anymore. I definitely had a lot more anger issues before hrt when i felt constantly dysphoric! Just in case someone watching the vid got spooked it was all bad on this side of the fence 😅

[@WillKemp]

You're so fucking good at talking about this stuff, it's an absolute fucking joy to listen to you, even though I'm not trans and never likely to be ❤

[@sonyateru]

you've been looking so bright and beautiful!! its lovely to see

[@LFOtobot]

Hell yeah Icky, Clockwork Orange me

[@Seashellshesell]

Fun facts abt clockwork orange BTW bc I'm autistic:) The composer of the soundtrack was a trans woman and the editing style was taken by the director from a Japanese movie abt trans women called Funeral Parade of Roses

[@tactileslut]

(as sampled in music from my most impressionable years) "It's a test . . . designed to provoke an emotional response."

[@espelhogamer]

@@Seashellshesell Wow I had no idea about any of that. Cool!

[@eporeon]

@@Seashellshesellvery fun fact ty

[@lichtsprecher]

“New house” is now a mythical thing

[@sagemcmichael8320]

What my mother hopes and prays for me.....😐she doesnt even realize that detransitioning after being on hrt for that long would be a whole new transition, not just "going back to normal" as she sees it😕

[@voltijuice8576]

So true - I’ve always thought that _re-transition_ would be more accurate

[@voidpunkprincess]

I don't know if I could stand to do so unless absolutely, medically necessary...

[@princessaka3189]

​@@voidpunkprincesshonestly i would rather choose death than go back. i rather choose happy than live depressed.

[@IllusiveChristie]

I'm 14 months, I could never go back. Hiding way too long.. never change yourself for someone else, moms, bffs, husband's etc. You have to be true to yourself. This goes for anything in life, not just transition.

[@wilburshuman]

@@IllusiveChristie I stopped in 2001 for what I thought was.... the most perfect women in the world. 6 years ago she left me destitute and lonely . 10 months ago I restarted HRT at 64 yrs old Annnnnnnnnd............ I, Have Never Ever, felt better !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Everything has been falling into place !!!!!!!! Its Amazing How............. once you start down the path you were destined to be on........... Everything comes together !!!!!!

[@PowhaBottom]

Today, i am going to the doctors office to begin the process of starting hrt! Ive though about it my whole life and it never seemed like a possibility.. through learning and acceptance im so close to it being a reality! Thank you for what you do Icky!❤

[@AnnaCurser]

if transition would stop at 40, that would be bad news. im almost 40 and i havent even started therapy (mostly bc its not accessable in my country(germany) and buying hormones is illegal). i do feel that its too late for me now. even if i get transition in the next 10 years, ill be too old to enjoy it, and only live like 10 more years before I'm a goner. i lost my childhood and most of my life to this issue now. im in the grave with one foot already. and at this point i think it might actually not be worth it to keep going. to be miserable for 50 years and then maybe not sad for a few years is a bad concept.

[@Zosia-jl4qu]

I was afraid to click on that video, the title triggered me. Watching this soothed my dysphoria, so that's great.

[@iana6713]

"The older I get, the more masculine I get...." Uhh, I think that's passed me by... I'm still waiting for that as I'm a guy with a fair few feminine traits from a very young age and they seem to get stronger the older I get! Love learning something new from each of your videos - you could call this the Icky-versity series!

[@hystericalbat22]

Dang, you really nailed that at the end! The whole video was so helpful and informative. Thanks Icky!

[@livvy94]

I started at 27 and I'm not gonna stop taking HRT so eventually I'm probably gonna look like somebody's grandma. And I think that's really sweet and I look forward to it ❤

[@liamwatts8597]

I'm very much looking forward to learning more! Definitely going to take a look at the PDF and would love to hear more from you! You have helped me become way more comfortable with the idea of transitioning with all your videos! Thank you Icky!❤

[@QALibrary]

From my point of view, Ashley feels like she is a brilliant human and the world is better because she part of it

[@briancuz5535]

My guess is no :3 🏳‍⚧

[@halicritters9478]

That hotel room is very clean. Good job.

[@nicklewis7087]

Icky is love, icky is life

[@alexrobers5542]

Thank you for your videos. They have relieved so much of my stress around the idea of transitioning

[@Perluwu]

i want to hug you so bad. these videos help so much thank youuuuuu

[@TiffanyLamp-wz6wk]

I started my transition at 44, at 45 I started HRT. I worried that it was too late for me but i see and feel changes everyday. It took almost a year but breast growth, hips, hair, skin, are all changing now. understand how you feel about “passing” that everyone’s journey is there own and you shouldn’t have to fall into anyone’s “normal” but for me “not passing” was one of the things that caused me dysphoria. I was 465lbs and 6’6”, i am now 292lbs and 6’4” I look and feel better than I have my entire life. I dont think I will ever “pass” but I now feel like a woman, and that is all that matters. Transitioning saved my life. Love yours and Finns videos. I especially love your fashion type videos. 🩷🩵

[@joe-zn6xb]

"you feel things deeper" bro I'm already an emotional wreck watching films😂 I'd be screwed

[@druurae]

Felt lol

[@rebeccacampbell7497]

I started at 55 and I've been on hormones. Ever since and I'm turning 66 this year. No surgery no fillers, nothing. It's all genetics now. I'm fortunate that my hair grows. My skin turned very soft. It went from oily skin to normal skin And I don't look 66 years old. I am closer to 50. It's a mindset for most people how you develop while taking hormones also depends on the dosage and what you are taking. I don't mind telling you that I am taking 7.5 mg weekly Valerate, intermuscular also taking 400 mg of progesterone per day. And 50 mg of Spironolactone daily.

[@nikkicoyotie8431]

buddy doesn't know how HRT works and thinks you're going to go through menopause

[@backhdlp]

you do have cool aunt vibes

[@cc8879]

Omg youre do cute today,! The makeup is on point, and I love how the filler frames your eyes. You're glowing girlie ^^

[@allie5549]

Started HRT at 47 about 3 years ago, and changes are still happening today. Never too late!

[@ArcAngle1117]

Starting HRT today! You and Finn helped me a lot!

[@EmpireGamingWynter]

The misconceptions around transitioning is why I didn't realise I'm trans until my 30s. I don't know what I thought trans people did but I always thought it was some sort of surgery. I didn't know about HRT until like 2021 and when I learned about it, I was amazed... by 2023 I was out

[@belladonna5012]

I transitioned at 19, am pushing 40 now, and cannot imagine why I would ever detransition. These "YOU'LL REGRET IT" people have skulls full of cottage cheese.

[@Ilamarea]

Lesbians with internalized homophobia and male-pattern baldness genes is one thing. Another is your tear ducts dying causing your eyes to flake with searing pain (not eye lids, eyes) and other fucked up shit, also, you know, being exposed to all this and easily influenced. If a westerner can be brainwashed into supporting Russia they for sure can be brainwashed into thinking they are something they ain't.

[@BastuGubbar]

0:11 if the editor had put in a tom scott ''i am at...'' in there that would be hilarious.

[@LaSneky]

I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING

[@LucyJuicyStardust]

Thank you so much Icky! You're the best. I've been trying to decide whether to start HRT for so long now, and your videos have been so informative and helped point me in the right direction and finally go forward with it! I'm scared but excited to get started 🥰

[@justsomeanimator]

Jokes on you, im already short, weak, and have poor vision! I haven't even started yet.

[@PenStab]

I just randomly found you and Finn like a couple weeks ago through YT and you have such a lovely energy, damn. Just seem like nice folks. Thanks for sharing your knowledge!

[@MaidLucy]

Thank you for guiding me through this existencial crysis

[@blackveilwidow902]

Thank you for your services. You are doing an excellent job for the community.❤

[@huntp1291]

Hey, im about to start HRT and im 52 this year, finally got my 2nd GiC appointment and the doc has given the go ahead. Im hoping for a lower dose that will help me manage my emotions, any physical effects wil obviously be a bonus before possibly upping the doss. Been slowly socially transistioning for the last 6years after I had told my wife about my feelings then through counselling and therapy realising I was trans 😊

[@dYstop1a_]

That sounds great!! im so happy for you and I wish you luck on your transitioning journey moving forward!!

[@emilynelson5985]

I started at like 20 for a minute, stopped because of an un-supportive environment and then started again in my mid to late 20's. While a lot of the result is genetic, I'd say that some the most important things that've happened occurred recently and internally as a change to the way I exist in the world as much if not more-so than any changes in the way my body exists in the world.

[@FreyjaThAwesome1]

i plan to look badass in my 80's so i will never de-transition

[@RedTRM]

I still need to look up stuff about E, but thanks for making this video! Your style is always fun and relaxing to watch and very informative as well!

[@chaosmkmk]

Loved the vibes of this video. Can always count on Ashley the Therapist ❤

[@paulhyde1834]

Thank you so much for this great info! You really are a smashing lass and Finster is sooo lucky to have you!!! Xxxc

[@realryal]

I'd been denying my own growth for long enough, no way I'll be stopping just because I hit 40.

[@jclars8324]

COMPLETELY unrelated to this video but your eyeliner is on POINT today- you’re so pretty

[@Naota33]

Lmao at the final boss comment. I'm in my 30s and have been considering transitioning and really do feel like these videos are making it hard to keep avoiding it.

[@8bittrigger]

Started at 34, 39 now, 40 next month. I’d be damned if I ever went back to being a guy.

[@terratorment2940]

I began transition at 30 and I am 40 now. I would be very disappointed if I encountered my future self via a time machine and I had detransitioned.

[@vivitheworld6059]

cool icky gave me the vibe of "girl u don't know who checks on u at a party and makes sure u have water and barks at men for u"

[@basicallyserena]

Truly... thank you for your content! You have helped me so much and I'm sure you did for many others as well

[@SarrahSteward-hr2bc]

I just started transitioning 3 months ago I'm 31 but I'm on testosterone blocker and estradiol pill form because I can get it cheapest to fit my budget I'm very happy with the few changes I've noticed I am getting breast growth and I am very happy with the results so far

[@voltijuice8576]

Speaking of de-transition, this week I have blocked many channel recommends because YT has been pushing too many reactionary and “gender critical” videos. Considering that the rate of detransition is so low, like 1% or less, I’ver been surprised how my recommendations have gotten to like 1/3 detrans stuff. FWIW I am supportive of individuals who have had problems or regrets in their transition, but I think that’s different than ppl on some crusade to warn people against transitioning. Not unlike how we coined the term “astroturf organizing” to highlight fake “grassroots” movements, punnily enough it looks like there are _astroTERF_ campaigns also.

[@durschfalltv7505]

The de-trans stuff is all ftm. Why? Cause being a man sucks. But yeah de-trans rate is more like 99%. It's 1% with the people who are insane enough to go to frankenstein doktors once you cross that bridge it's impossible it's either lifetime delusion or suicide. That's where the 1% detrans rate comes from. Suicide mostly. The thing is a person who just stops the transition is not recorded. The statistics are skewed to fool you. But yeah i am not transphobic. Just don't cut off your genitalia cause that's very extreme. We don't allow people to do heroin so ... i mean i like some anarchist ideals BUT society currently needs order. I know the desire to be female on some days. Being a man sucks on some days. But really stop obessing about your body. It's just a body. It doesn't matter how it looks like. As long as you keep it healthy it doesn't matter if your pretty or not. Doesn't matter how your teeth look. Doesn't matter if your fit or fat besides your health that obviously suffers when your fat. Accept your body. However i would encourage all men to start taking some estrogen and all women to start taking some testosterone so they can more easily relate. But yeah allthough i you can't change your sex. You can change your gender to the point you fit into the opposite gender role better than into your original one. And once you go beyond that point of no return it may be healthier for your body to not de- transition. But it's healthier to not go beyond the point of no-return. If you don't go beyond that and fit into the opposite gender role fine. If you don't i would suggest de-transitioning.

[@electronics-girl]

I keep hoping that Elon Musk will take all of his fellow transphobes to Mars with him. Then they would truly be astroTERFs.

[@voidpunkprincess]

I adore my "girl juice". I'm an emergency nurse and I swear to you sometimes, even after 2 years I just want to just take like 6 times the dosage even though I know that would be bad. I have so much positive associations with the way it made me feel and that initial changes that even though I *don't want to OD* and get like a crazy clot or something, the impulse is so often there.

[@monk3311]

As a straight guy i was always confused about it and i just heard scraps of controversal figures over the medias. so this video was welcoming and i think understand it much better now cuz of your explanation :]

[@UwUImTheo]

*cis guy Sexuality has nothing to do with one's gender

[@monk3311]

@@UwUImTheo I never said it has. but logically if u are cis person youre mostly around other cis people. same it is with trans people. humans like to ´´divide´´ themselves into groups because the more stuff they have in common then more they are feeling comfortable around eachother :) Again, im not saying cis person and trans person cant have normal relationship with eachother :D but it isnt that common between people. thats why i think its important to see between those ´´social barriers´´ and learn from eachother.

[@Briannadawn20]

For those F to M taking testosterone, be careful of other medications you take. Testosterone will in many cases be safe and calm everything down overall. But mixed with some antidepressants can cause an uncomfortable feeling of rage and anger. Before I realized I was trans I took testosterone for years because I didn’t make enough naturally. I had a bad reaction to testosterone and an antidepressant which was a rage I could not handle or ever want to feel again. If you experience this talk to your prescriber about interactions with testosterone and other medications. Then make the best decision for you. Best advice I can give

[@nisagomez4366]

The title made me laugh! 40? I transitioned 15 years later.