Winning a Waiting Game | The Longing & Mental Health

#thelonging #quarantine #mentalhealth #psychology #gaming #selfcare
Thanks for watching How to Be Alone The Longing + Mental Health! (Sorry for some of the audio issues !! )
I've been playing the idle adventure The Longing lately and its actually been helping me with coping with my quarantine isolation. Even though it isn't a social game in any respect, it has helped me practice mindfulness, reminded me of the importance of self-care, and inspired me to take better care of myself the way I take care of my Shade. I really recommend this game to everyone who needs some quiet time and self-compassion practice!!
Read More at the Website: screentherapyblog.wordpress.com
Twitter: / screen_therapy
Facebook: / screentherapy
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Game:
The Longing (2020) by Anselm Pyta and Studio Seufz
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Music:
Outro/Theme: Never Really Gone by Stuart Bateman!
Stuart Bateman - / stuartbateman
/ stuartebateman
The Longing - Soundtrack
by Lord Redstone, Erdstall, Spectral Kingdom, Vindkaldr, dungeontroll, Erang
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Sources in Order:
Sliwinski, J., Katsikitis, M., & Jones, C. M. (2017). A review of interactive technologies as support tools for the cultivation of mindfulness. Mindfulness, 8(5), 1150-1159
Gackenbach, Jayne & Bown, Johnathan. (2011). Mindfulness and Video Game Play: A Preliminary Inquiry. Mindfulness. 2. 114-122. 10.1007/s12671-011-0049-2.
Sliwinski J., Katsikitis M., Jones C.M. (2015) Mindful Gaming: How Digital Games Can Improve Mindfulness. In: Abascal J., Barbosa S., Fetter M., Gross T., Palanque P., Winckler M. (eds) Human-Computer Interaction -
INTERACT 2015. INTERACT 2015. Lecture Notes in Computer Science, vol 9298. Springer, Cham
Bowman, N. D., Oliver, M. B., Rogers, R., Sherrick, B., Woolley, J., & Chung, M. Y. (2016). In control or in their shoes? How character attachment differentially influences video game enjoyment and appreciation. Journal of Gaming & Virtual Worlds, 8(1), 83-99.
Behm-Morawitz, E. (2013). Mirrored selves: The influence of
self-presence in a virtual world on health, appearance, and well-being. Computers in human Behavior, 29(1), 119-128.
Kiani, Massi Joe E. "Avatar-incentive healthcare therapy." U.S. Patent No. 10,279,247. 7 May 2019.
Sestir, M., & Green, M. C. (2010). You are who you watch: Identification and
transportation effects on temporary self-concept. Social influence, 5(4), 272-288.
Nabi, R. L., & Prestin, A. (2017). The tie that binds: Reflecting on
emotion's role in the relationship between media use and subjective well-being.
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Video Credits :
The Longing Gameplay clips from GameCornerZ
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Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, commenting, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favour of fair use.

[@S1ipperyJim]

I love how the shade starts grinning happily in his little cave once you have expanded it and decorated it for him

[@SatireGod]

I noticed that, and it’s nice

[@RisqueBisquet]

I loved this game. My only complaint is that my gamer nature got the better of me. Because I liked the style, the ambiance, and the mystery, and because there was an _objective,_ I felt like I had to win. I looked up guides, found all the achievements, and tried to maximize my efficiency at waiting. And in the end, I felt like I was cheating. I wanted to win, and I wanted to feel like I had perfected my outcome, which is antithetical to the game's theme of learning to simply pass time.

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thanks for adding this great perspective. This is definitely common for lots who played this game. I wish I had touched on it in the video.

[@metalchemik]

This game reminds me a little kid left alone in home, when the drunk father sleeps in the living room

[@TiredTimelord]

I'm stuck in bed from chronic illness and have nothing but time now. I'm 100% going to get this right now and start a playthrough I can check on every day

[@vladaudio3967]

As someone who himself enjoys spending time alone, in a calm and quiet environment(whenever possible), I think I will love it. The slow paste of exploration without feeling rushed or having to show or prove anything to anyone. That sounds good, great content once again. Take Care :)

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thank you!! I really like your point about not needing to show or prove anything, that is definitely a beneficial plus of this game!

[@vladaudio3967]

@@ScreenTherapy Especially nowadays where a lot of games turn competitive. Nothing really "wrong" against it, but in the long run it's crazy how it can drain someone.

[@IDoABitOfTrollin]

I find myself caring about the shade. And want to fulfill his needs he writes in the thoughts book

[@SatireGod]

For me the goal was to give the shade a bed, as it stated it had a dream of having a bed, so I set out to make the shade a bed, and now after passing the darkness, the shade talked about never seeing the surface, now I want to show that to the shade, but there are duties and my morbid curiosity of multiple endings

[@yaniraguzman4046]

It's such a cool Concept. I wonder if it can be Executed in other ways... hmm BRO WTF HOW DID YOU GET HERE😐 alright you win.

[@really.rhino12]

should be the top comment

[@Matt-cz6ti]

I listen to audiobooks while I play this game. The hours just flow by and I become a little more well-read every time I play

[@tortoiselover7215]

That's what I was thinking I'd do if I got it.

[@joneslr25]

Some aspects of the game you do need to listen for sound ques though to get certain things in the game....

[@memenazi7078]

Right but how can you ever play this game without multitasking?!

[@mcain2911]

You got yourself a subscriber. This is one of the most unique channels I’ve seen in a long time and I love what you do.

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thank you very much for the kind comment and for subscribing!!

[@TerranPersoid725]

Fred Rogers would have loved this. He had said something before about how we don’t really interact with media that practices reflection. Personally, I find Death Stranding really helped me with this.

[@silverswordsmith5424]

Something that took me by surprise as I played The Longing is that early on the amount of time I had to wait seemed daunting and I was a touch impatient, paying close attention to how long it would be until the next thing happened, utilizing the room to speed up time as much as possible, etc. But as the time ticked down and got closer and closer to the end, I realized I didn't want it to end. Within the last month I stopped using the shades room entirely, trying to drag out those last days. It didn't matter that there wasn't really anything left to do or see, I just didn't want it to stop. I had grown comfortable with the time I could spend quietly with my shade and the realization that that time was running out was intensely unpleasant. In time, the end did come, and there was nothing I could do to stop it, which I guess you could look at as an analogy of life and death. The more of it you live, the less you feel impatience for it to continue, and as you near the end, you cling to it for as long as you can before it inevitably ceases.

[@christosmatkaris8697]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE Come back with a video about Outer Wilds!! We miss your essay full of amazingly amazing amazigness. You are greatly brilliant!

[@ItMeLily]

Thank you for another great video. I think I will try this game, i love the idea of falling into meditation and taking care of the shade which is almost like a shadow of us. You mentioned there were other games like this, could you share some of those?

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thank you for commenting and I hope your enjoy the game!! I actually havent seen a game quite like the longing before but I love games that bend genres like it does. One that has a very similar feel and use of time is The Witness, I highly recommend giving it a look, theres much more to it than meets the eye!

[@joneslr25]

I LOVE this game so freaking much!!! I'm on day 361, playing on the Switch. Zero regrets in this purchase. I love her review also.

[@nobi-the-solo-master4132]

In total, I've only played it once. But also through. Now the good Shade lives with the nice people and the child. Wanted to give him a better alternative to life. Even if it means leaving the king. To leave his home. Just to get a new home and nice company. ^^ I didn't regret it. I have just grown fond of him.

[@clankchet7610]

The longing is my comfort game and now i know why haha. Thank you for this little beautiful video

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thank you for watching and commenting - I totally agree, The Longing is very comforting. I'm thinking of starting a new game. :)

[@clankchet7610]

@@ScreenTherapy me too haha, i want to discover all the secrets and some folks say that there is a misterious secret tower(also the end is devastating, that made this game my goty)

[@LoverOfMuch]

> opens this video to avoid being alone > confronted with awareness of this behavior during the video OH NOOOOOOO but seriously I'm glad I watched it

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thanks so much for adding this! Glad I could help! Also, getting this comment just reminded ME to become aware of my avoidant behavior I was engaging in right now. Very helpful as a mindfulness reminder lol

[@Oogasra]

seeing the timer tick down faster with the amount of items in the Shades room gave me an insight that the more you have, the faster time tends to go. Isn't it surprising that the Longing has made its way to the Nintendo Switch? Animal Crossing is about the same, except it isn't lonely and you have more to do. I'm not saying Animal Crossing is the superior game, but saying it's in a similar nature, due to everything running at real-time all day every day. As for this video, it was very insightful on how the mind works because of one game.

[@Fortenhell]

I had such an urge to build a bed for my shade. And I would not log out without getting him under the sheets

[@DanielSantosAnalysis]

What a fascinating game, thank you for your insight and for putting a spotlight on it.

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thank you for watching and commenting!! 🙂

[@tubeman5987]

I loved playing the longing. When the time passed I was really reluctant to finish it and I genuinely felt like someone I knew just died when I did. I really want to replay the game but I'm takin the developers advice and not replaying it . I want the longing to a stay unique experience and for it to be alive only in my memory until it fades

[@fabi3790]

I can relate a bit to the shade I have no friends so no purpose to go outside Even if I go outside I would be alone. Have trouble speaking to other people (making friends) My only friend lives hours away. Still have my family nearby. But yeah. I spend my days in my room. Hit me really with covid and lockdown. Others broke down and stuff.. i realised... nothing really changed for me. Yeah I had school online... thats it Kinda depressing. I am happy tho

[@Sandra-hc4vo]

this is kind of depressing, cause you point out how we as a people generally don't feel allowed to sit and be. that feels very true to me.

[@flarfo348]

I really want to play this game again but I would feel bad for making the shade wait again after all that work

[@KacyJones]

Whoa, this one was even more amazing, holy cow! Looking at waiting in this way is such a helpful skill. I hadn’t heard of this game before, but now I’m definitely gonna check it out

[@raph2550]

Very valuable video!

[@joaquinbaume1291]

i can't belive it, i might just have found a great great channel, videogame reviews + mini essays??? i'm in

[@ScreenTherapy]

I hope you enjoy my channel! 🙂

[@vc68675]

You should look up the suicide ending of this game here in youtube. Very sad.

[@Zoltiboi]

Great video Courtney! I love your taste in games and you seem to be a very interesting person.. I probably would never have stumbled upon this game without this video. I am truly grateful for you sharing this content with me and with many others. This game is another fine example of how indie game devs manage to redefine the meaning of the word videogame. I haven't tried out the game yet, but I think The Longing offers a very unique experience to its players: it makes you face your fear of the ticking clock. Some of us get anxious about school tests, others fear deadlines (both are very understandable), but death is a thing we all are afraid of. We are afraid of leaving a space filled with unfinished business and missed opportunities, leaving loved ones behind in sorrow, which we would probably also blame ourselves for. In my opinion, humanity is distracted by the future and the past, focusing on things they can't change anymore and on goals they can't reach yet. Instead of focusing on reaching a state we promise ourselves we will be satisfied with (making it to the top in our career, having x income, going on holidays, starting family), I think we should live more in the present and focus on a constant growth through self-reflection, no matter what point of our lives we are at. If we are willing to grab the responsibility of shaping our own lives, we quickly realize there's no point being afraid of something we cannot change.

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thanks so much for the comment and the kind words!! I agree wholeheartedly with your points! In fact, your points are very similar to Stoicism thought. If you havent already, I highly recommend exploring Stoic philosophy. I dont mention philosophy in my videos but Stoicism is at the heart of many of my favorite perspectives like the one you detailed. Thanks again!

[@Zoltiboi]

@@ScreenTherapy thanks, I will definitely look into it!

[@ianmillado1810]

Wow, this is a really interesting video! The wait was totally worth it. This review couldn't have come at a better time than now, especially since lockdown has put the world in such a similar situation as the Shade. I also suffer (immensely) from perfectionism and anxiety, and I used to always have my head in the future rather than in the present, always working for some far away goal. However, I'm beginning to understand that it's okay and healthy to just be in the moment, caring for ourselves right now. This is nothing new, but I keep finding myself stressing out that I'm somehow wasting my time. Also, I would also only do something if it contributed to something larger, like (most obviously) some career goal. I never really took the time to appreciate the small, yet valuable beauties of life, nor would I engabe myself in a fun or interesting hobby if it didn't give me some immediate, practical benefit. My parents are very pragmatic, and that mindset has been engrained in me. While it is good to be goal-centered at times, it's just as important, even more so, to make sure you can find happiness and fulfillment with yourself. When you think about it, there really isn't any way to waste time when it comes to self-care, given that you are in touch with yourself and your needs. Contrary to hustle culture, it's perfecfly okay to take care of yourself, and do small, but meaningful things; I especially liked that one bit where the Shade said that looking and contemplating art can be a great way to pass the time. In fact, I'm beginning to understand the appeal of art appreciation (of all kinds). Yes, it won't land you a job, nor will it necessarily get you a degree, or even get you paid. However, it's still very valuable, because it enriches the self. I'm even getting back into reading just for fun or for contemplation, rather than only read stuff related to what job I'm hoping to get soon. At the end of the day, what truly matters is finding happiness and fulfillment in one's life; in this view, no time is wasted if it is spent mindfully and purposefully. All of this really hits home for me, because I'm in a situation where I don't have much freedom to do much. However, this has kinda forced me to slow my own self down, and reign in my thoughts out of some uncertain future, and into just living here, right now, in this moment. I've been starting to really only plan for the week, or even just the day, rather than sit on some future event; in my case, my first semester of college is coming up. I'm really anxious about how that will be, but for now the best thing to do is to focus on self-care and do what I can now. This game looks like it can not just teach living in the moment, but truly simulate how living in the moment actually looks like. I guess this is why I love video games: they act as simulations to help us exercise different mental skill in a safe, controlled environment, but they are also art in that they not only teach, but memorialize and inspire its central message in our hearts in a way that we not only understand rationally, but emotionally as well, in a way that we can live it out in our lives. Thank you so much for the upload! I'm on the notification gang, so it was an honor to see this pop up. In fact, now would be a great time to try this out and practice the skills this game teaches, since I'll be looking forward to you next video or post! Great job on the research and video editing, and I hope you have a nice day!

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thanks so much for sharing and for being on notifications! 😁 everything you said really resonated with me as well! It's a difficult time right now for those of us with anxiety and perfectionism, our default is thinking about the future but the future is more uncertain than ever. We've been left in a limbo state. But, exactly like you said, living in the moment and appreciating small blessings can help ground us back to the joys around us, from a nice meal, a funny joke, a good game, or a pleasant walk among nature - opportunities for joy and gratitude are always around us waiting to be noticed ☺️

[@Zoltiboi]

Wow. You absolutely amaze me with your self-confidence and how you can express gratitude in such a genuine way. I am glad that I can meet people like you under these videos. You have a beautiful soul and I think you are on the right track focusing on baby steps and on one week at a time :)

[@ianmillado1810]

@@ScreenTherapy Your welcome! I had fun jotting down my thoughts; it's pretty therapeutic to reflect on things like this. And I'm happy to be part of this community! You guys are so wholesome 🥰

[@ianmillado1810]

@@Zoltiboi Thank you so much for the compliment! It really makes me happy to hear that! I've been struggling with some tough issues for a while now, but I've been slowly trying to learn how to be more understanding, gentle, and patient with myself. It's a work in progress, but I'm glad to hear I'm doing something right! I hope you have a good day or night, and that you stay safe :-D

[@Alawngnome47]

This world we've made for us now is a world of instant gratification and expectation of what "should" be ours.

[@Peter-vx5yf]

Underated video, you really went deep on the explanations and meanings of the game and even got me to think for a while.

[@antisanity_]

I am rock. I no move. I no rush. I sit. I sleep. I dream. I happy.

I'm so happy to watch this video, I really needed to hear all of this

[@steaktastebetterpill]

If the shade has a voice, you can bet he sounds exactly like Salad Fingers.

[@kristensadlier]

I really appreciate this thoughtful review. Subscribed!

[@Lopitra]

I have a special love for this game. One of the ways I spent time was just finding out how to play 'incy wincy spider'. That took a WHILE to get right.

[@naiameyers4725]

I literally just got this game but the painstakingly slow walking is making me want to claw my eyes out. I hope I move past this.

[@fabnorum9568]

After I first saw this video, I saved up to buy this game. Now over having it for a little bit over 1 year it and 341 hours played, it has remained as my favorite game without question

[@scottash351]

I'll show this one to my gaming niece and nephew too. Thank you 😊

[@Nanami_X_Higurama]

I'm so glad to have found this channel now , thank you and you've got a new subscriber

[@ScreenTherapy]

Welcome to the channel! I'm glad you found it, too!

[@oscarmeadowcroft]

I'm getting this game to teach me patience.

[@ScreenTherapy]

Awesome! Highly recommend it as a patience-strengthening tool!

[@penagelada8396]

How’d it go?

[@oscarmeadowcroft]

@@penagelada8396 well the game is still in progress... Pretty fun though

[@archivesofarda986]

Never Alone Unravel The Longing Far: Lone Sails Gris My therapeutic game list

[@VanillaAnimations]

This channel is so underrated ;_; needs more love!!

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thank you!!

[@Tommy-TwigFan]

Fantastic video.

[@raynedragon7097]

Gained a subscriber. Thank you for this!

[@Milk7ss]

Very well made!

[@ScreenTherapy]

Thank you very much!!

[@WatPatat]

This has been my favorite game so far that I've played in 2022, and I have played (and gotten the platinum for) Elden Ring

[@mangaas]

I started the game, added a reminder on my phone, and hopped back on to watch the ending over a year later. The king stands up and destroys everything when you wake him, saying he fixed everything by destroying it. Meh. Save yourself the time and just watch the endings on KZbin. (Apparently there's more than one)

[@christianwalton7080]

Yeah. I also saw the reading selection and didn't think it was too great having Nietzsche in there. SPOILERS AHEAD I'm glad she likes the game, but tbh I think this game is somewhat nihilistic. The best ending of the game is to forsake the king to his death and find a family on the surface world. You finally find color and happiness in that courage to ascend. The other endings include trying to do that but dying: a noble idea sadly executed. OR Suicide. Straight up hurling yourself into a void. This game isn't a very happy one imo, because you can either cling to promises of goodness only to awaken a great death, die in 2 different ways, or maybe find love.

[@biggie9275]

0 dislikes great vid i loving hearing about this lovely game

[@captaintogawa9736]

And this comment is 6 months old so I know this was true and not just a joke!

[@ScreenTherapy]

Ha! Thanks for that!

[@nexussays]

My shade has spent the past many many months in Eternity because he has a nice cozy cave and time is passing faster and faster, and I am paralyzed by which path to take. Sometimes I just consider jumping.

[@lootownica]

I love hall of eternity.

[@Falrientik]

I'm 175 days, 11 hours, and 27 minutes into my game.

[@mtape1234]

Do you run out of things to do in this game eventually?

[@ScreenTherapy]

There are portions of the game you cant access until days or weeks pass and a specific event happens. (Like a slow, constant drop of water eventually filling up a portion of the map over weeks) Early in the game you can explore and it takes many hours but eventually you do run out of things to do, however you need to come back in a couple days to see if another portion of the cave has been unlocked. Its well-placed and keeps you coming back if you're curious enough.

[@tortoiselover7215]

I can't believe you're channel is so small

[@isaias3423]

Is it me? Or it looks like that she said the same thing since the beginning of the ideo.

[@Ari-Ari-Ari]

Hello, Have you ever played „ Sky:children of the light“? Just interesting.

[@ScreenTherapy]

I havent yet, I'll have to look it up!! Thanks!

[@penagelada8396]

@@ScreenTherapy it’s an amazing game! You should!

[@Haleygirl7257]

Can someone tell me how to play 🙏🏻I’m trying to get him to jump or don’t understand the writing thing either. Can someone help me pls. Seems so cute ❤️🙏🏻

[@joneslr25]

She is explaining the game....I bought the game and absolutely love it. I play everyday. Just buy the game, it's cheap and worth the money.

[@memenazi7078]

Don’t be a perfectionist

[@ansonlee9401]

this game sucks