Women in a world without men...

[@chadthunderstroke]

Who in 1990's would believe Rosanne would look better than Madonna in '2024?

[@nannerl6243]

Madonna always looked like a cheap hook er though.

[@debby8428]

so true!

[@wesleypepple7525]

Ikr Madonna looks like a science experiment gone horribly wrong

[@TexanTrad]

I'm kinda upset about Sharon Osbourne too.. the ozempic face. I always liked her. She looks kinda scary now.

[@classicrocklover5615]

I think Rosanne sings better than Madonna now, too 😂

[@patrickbelongea6896]

Slavery has existed in Africa since before recorded history.

[@Cody_Ramer]

And still exists in some parts...

[@hansdampf640]

not only in africa... it was pretty common in the whole ancient world

[@kj7792]

We are slaves here too😢 Taxation is theft

[@RiotforPeacePlz]

Slavery still exists in the west it's just better masked. Have to get those 80 hours a week if you want to make rent and have bread to eat...

[@iamhereforever]

Egypt

[@seandelap8587]

What i have learned since 2020 is never automatically trust someone just because they happen to wear a white coat

[@sukaenacornelius9285]

Truf. I may or may not wear one. Can neither confirm nor deny.

[@Readrose8]

Yeah there’s a lot of people and ‘experts’ I no longer trust since 2020 guess it’s hindsight is 2020

[@roberthickerty390]

It is sad but true. Ethics took a real hit in 2020.

[@cherylclick1664]

absolutely

[@n4ughty_knight]

If they need a white coat than it isn't the truth

[@miscprojects9662]

My two female neighbors didn't want any help lifting their big screen until after they dropped it.

[@keinlieb3818]

Instead of being more careful with your dates, stop texting during movies. Stay off your phone and stop talking. You ruin it for everyone, not just your date.

[@Bayloy]

Wow youre the douche who has to sue for $17.31

[@zenithperigee7442]

@keinlieb3818, why ANYONE with good sense would have their phone out "texting friends" during a freaking movie when you're supposed to be enjoying a date, is beyond me....🙄I don't even like interacting with my phone except to quickly search something, listen to music/video etc. But when I'm with people, it becomes virtually non-existent. It's funny to me how times have changed, sitting in public places it's rare that people even talk to each other anymore, most bury their noses in their phones.

[@mrt2this607]

@@zenithperigee7442 many of these types will be completely compliant and happily plug themselves into their new machine pods, be fed insect-based mush through a tube, owning nothing and being "happy". All while never interacting with another real person again.

[@willischwabe1324]

​@@zenithperigee7442I also don't get it. There is time before the movie and after the movie and really I can't imagine any scenario in which someone could not text outside of the time frame the movie plays, unless it is an emergency of some sort. Texting back later is always an option and just saying brb.

[@Redthumb7]

I don’t think you guys saw the real issue. She was browsing profiles on a dating site during the date

[@autumnm2075]

Texting during a date, rude to the other person. Texting during a movie, rude to everyone in the theater.

[@Ranger1PresentsVirtualRealms]

Yep, you'd think the lesson she learned would be to turn off your phone at the movies and not text while on a date... but nope, didn't even occur to her.

[@natehill8069]

Date sure. But how is texting (no noises) rude during a movie?

[@Someone-ti1cj]

I thought it's about last slice of pizza

[@favoritemustard3542]

Yup. Having that bright ass screen light up 3 aisles worth of theater is pretty distracting & annoying. Stay off your phone for 2hrs: _impossible!_

[@MykeLewisMusic]

More than ZERO is too many text messages during a movie.

[@zenithperigee7442]

@MykeLewisMusic, yes, if it's not an emergency then what are you doing with that freaking phone out when your potential new "Bo/Babe" is next to you wanting to enjoy a movie with you.... -_- I remember being in a similar situation where my beloved Mother was rushed to the hospital. Those situations are the only good reasons your phone should even be "on" during "meetings/dates" etc.

[@Moarlatz]

12:50 I applaud that Man for spite suing that Women, obviously he doesn't care about the money, no sane person would relative to the effort needed to sue, he likely did it because she was a beach to him, she probably shamed, and gaslighted him, etc. The usual treatment that Women give us Men, and he decided nahh not letting it go.

[@tin2001]

Yeah. I try to keep it to zero, but sometimes you get something that needs a fairly urgent reply, and you have no control over the timing.

[@Ranger1PresentsVirtualRealms]

@@tin2001 Or, conversely, you could actually be considerate and turn your phone OFF during the movie as they request. If you can't turn off your phone for a couple of hours, don't go to the movies until you can. It's not that difficult folks.

[@awdeveau]

I've started leaving my phone at home or in the vehicle at times. I found myself thinking about when I was a teenager in the 90's-early 2000's and how things in general used to be so much better. So as an experiment I stopped taking my phone when doing certain things like going to a movie or out to eat. You really don't realize how much you're looking at your phone instead of paying attention to the things you're doing or the people you're with until you don't have it. I now bring it with me in the vehicle in case of emergencies, but usually leave it in the center console muted. It's honestly been refreshing.

[@skyesfury8511]

"and she learned to be more careful while dating" So she didn't learn the correct lesson. If you're on a date GET THE F**K OFF YOUR PHONE.

[@sburker32]

Yep that's what I said

[@brodelicious]

You know those people are actually perfect for each other.

[@tetsuo3k]

@@brodelicious I kind of got that vibe too!

[@dylanflynn1895]

if you are in a movie theatre turn it off

[@skyesfury8511]

@@dylanflynn1895 That, too!

[@AnthonyDemarco-q4n]

Spot on with the doctors , that is exactly why they call it a " practice" , they're just shooting from the hip lol

[@platibyte]

You can only win nobel prices in fields that are 95% guessing and bullshitting.

[@scottcarr3264]

And the Patient says,: No I don't want someone who is "Practicing" I want someone who KNOWS What he is DOING.

[@deliarealtor]

That’s how I felt when my husband was in the hospital last October - November.

[@sarahschannel1980]

I hate all these so called women hating on men. We can't have a world without men. Period. Thank God 4 them..

[@LadyDecember]

Careful, you're gonna summon all the girls trying to earn feminist points for their girlboss coven and think they're so smooth by asking "dId YoU gEt PiCkEd YeT?"

[@jwilliam2255]

Humanity *absolutely* demands both kinds of humans (yes dears, there are now, always have been, always will be, EXACTLY two kinds of human). In fact, the two kinds of humans are COMPLEMENTARY in an enormous variety of ways. In fact, based purely on observation, COMPLEMENTARITY is one of the fundamental principles of the organization and operation of the universe.

[@shawna5706]

I agree 100%. We need men. Those idiots doing that are just that, idiots. Men build and fix everything, they provide, invent and they protect. Women hating on men are morons who are alone for a reason. That's the difference between conservative and liberal women.

[@shawna5706]

@@LadyDecember There's a good reason why many of us have been happily married for decades and those female types are alone and angry.

[@Krunchtastic727]

After decades of man hating the sympathy does nothing to make up for lost time. Feminism proved what women are.

[@TheSuperappelflap]

Dude got his 17 dollars back. Thats a win in my book.

[@floydhenry5221]

Court cost probably double that to file. Worth every penny.😂😂😂😂

[@3RR0R210]

In the end, she never accepted her accountability

[@jimmynovak7913]

It’s an L.. he’s a tool. Lol

[@saltycat662]

How was that case not thrown out? Stupidest thing ever. Dude is a sociopath.

[@Kalbuir66]

@@3RR0R210 of course she didn't...lol

[@laurelzenn2412]

Dude! WTF?! Vacuum sealing leftovers in this economy is next level brilliant! You go Grandma!

[@reignman30]

Depends on how expensive those plastic bags are.

[@brentlloyd7908]

@@reignman30 pricey to be honest

[@jp7147]

He basically told his date she ain't worth $17.31.😂😂

[@saltycat662]

She wasn't though

[@XKnightLightX]

$5 on only fans though. He got a good look at her for sure. Guess he got his bang for his buck of time. Might not be the biggest bang for his buck but it's better than overpaying

[@testickles8834]

About the most i would pay for a sloppy toppy with a twist.

[@mariecurie7840]

When my daughter was three, she did a similar "art piece" on a blank wall between the bathroom and kitchen. I should have kept it, it could have been worth millions.

[@jeremybrooks7415]

"How dare we speak Merry Christmas "? Who taught her English?

[@TLowGrrreen]

Must be East Indian/Jamaican/Canadian Marxist patois.😂

[@otpyrcralphpierre1742]

Karl Marx.

[@donadeavera9608]

Canadians and her Indian mother.😅

[@Tryp-j9d]

Some INDIAN!!

[@smallestgoober9399]

Indian tech scammers.

[@Jurjen_Warrel_Ottenhoff]

My mother works at an art college and I remember her telling me a students art installation was "destroyed" a couple of years ago. The cleaning lady had thrown a large part of it away. In her defense, it was a bed with a bunch of literal garbage around it.

[@budgunter8950]

In defense of Grandpa going wild with a vacuum sealer .....the grandchild is probably not putting lids back on any of the containers and letting everything ruin, or spill. so grandpa is being a smart ass to make a point after telling them (for the 87th time this week) to reseal things when they open it.

[@wmason1961]

People with children in the house can not comprehend just how long an older person has to make leftovers last in the fridge. Leftovers have to last a while when you're the only one raiding the fridge. Throwing out food because you put it away sloppily gets expensive. And it's probably the kid that gave them the sealer making the video.

[@nwmgnoe316]

Grandchild extremely rude and disrespectful to grandparents.

[@donadeavera9608]

I laughed at Roseanne 's definition of a woman. Genius, and true.😅😅😅

[@scot3178]

Thanks Rosanne. We've been waiting for the definition.

[@scottcarr3264]

Yeah, and She Gave it To Ya. !!

[@perrymccain8858]

I have a neighbor I’ve spoken to twice in the last 18 years. Both times because one of my dogs got out of my yard, and he felt threatened. (Both were kid/people friendly Labs) It’s been 5 years since our last “interaction”.

[@VictoriaMarch13]

Labs are the best. I had a black lab named Raven that was killed last Sunday when one of my sons left the gate open. He doesn't know that he's the one that left the gate open because he's 8 and it would devastate him. I've cried all week. Labs are so sweet and smart and she was both. ❤

[@Sica210]

@@VictoriaMarch13 I’m sorry for y’all’s loss. 💔 Losing a pet is so very hard, especially on a kid. And even more especially if he knew he was at fault. Poor baby. Yes, I know, he’s 8, but, keep ‘em young, I say. Hold that secret close, Momma Bear. You a good one for that. 🫶🏻

[@aleksejjovanovic986]

You should be happy for that. Who wants to speak to people like them anyway...

[@UgigigcuguUgigigydyfjg-fl2qi]

At least you know who you can eat when the power goes out.

[@richardunruh4035]

"Heard a noise in the tent": I'm guessing that he won't leave the door unzipped in the future. Pro tip: when you're setting up in the dark, use a flashlight to make sure you're not setting up on top of an ant nest.

[@woodson21]

“HoW dArE wE sAy MeRrY cHrIsTmAs!?” X2 “Merry Christmas everyone.” Nothing encapsulates liberals in 2024 better than this.

[@shawna5706]

As a Muslim who works for a large business, I say it as loudly as I can. What are they going to do to me for saying it? Call me racist? I am a POC. We were "ordered" by our upper management to say "happy holidays" and not " Merry Christmas". Well, I am not doing that. Because when they take an inch, they will take a mile if we don't push back. United we stand, divided we fall people!!! We are supposed to have freedom of speech. I will say what I want, and if it's Merry Christmas, then that's what it is.

[@NoixNoir-gu4fd]

Kamala is not a liberal. Kamala is a corporate- friendly centrist politically with mainstream personal views.

[@coolj0075]

I love that he had to read the Korean slavery thing himself. Greatest self own of all time 😂

[@scottcarr3264]

yeah, I liked that too.

[@Lomojo31]

And his response was awesomely appropriate.

[@scubasteve2189]

Yep. Also, in case people don’t know Bobby Lee, he is a comedian and even when he was making the statement about no slavery, he wasn’t being serious, and probably already knew he was going to get owned. 😂👍🏻

[@julioabelguimmarra469]

The fact about Korean slavery, and the definition of woman... I laughed so hard at work...

[@aleksejjovanovic986]

Koreans got me man, i knew as soon he opened his mouth that it was going to be funny af. XD

[@cynthiawrightrealtor4777]

No not petty!! Stop this self entitled girls from being SO RUDE. It is the principle of the matter… that is 17 dollars of HIS hard earned money.

[@renegadetenor]

Thank -you!

[@club23world]

I Agree, people getting their phone out is so annoying I paid to watch a film not you constantly distracting me.

[@TheCrazyMoparDude68]

No, the lengths he went to get back at her was very petty and bordering on harassment. He acted like a child and should have just let it go, now everyone in his town knows he is an asshole.

[@richardjohnson2965]

I just give my junk away…it’s easier. Put a sign at the end of my driveway..”Free”…and it’s gone. Also: my golf clubs come from Goodwill, and my golf balls from the pro-shop…the ones they got out of the water, and sell for .25 apiece. They are going back to the water anyway.

[@ConservativeGrouch]

Seeing the guy dump golf balls into his bag reminded me of the ONE time I played golf. I thought, "People really think this is *FUN??"*

[@joejackson4202]

Roseanne Barr legend

[@marysander36]

Its a sad day for humanity, when you can't tell what a woman is, from a man. Growing up in my generation, no one ever appeared confused! Just in the last few years, this generation seems to be having trouble! The animal popopulation isn't having this problem, so its very much a human problem. But now some humans are saying that they are a certain kind of animal. Though those particular types of animals are rejecting their inclusion!! OMG! They're exclusionary!!!! Call DOJ!!! Its gotten pretty ridiculous! Imo

[@nicomeier8098]

@@marysander36 It's called Marxists indoctrination, designed to de-stabilize communities.

[@zenithperigee7442]

@@marysander36 , "wokeness" is wickedness. Compare the ideology with God's Word and it's clear to see. God's Word declares that He MADE mankind in His Image, male and female He made them. Godless "wokeness" declares, "You can pick your own gender!" God's Word declares and I'm paraphrasing for context, "...those humans who take the innocent lives of other humans, should be put to death by humans...." A human can't get more innocent than an unborn child, made in God's Image.... "Wokeness" declares, "It's a woman's right to abort 'it' for any reason, besides 'it' is just a clump of cells anyway...." So says the ONCE "Just a clump of cells." Again, "wokeness" is wickedness which the Democrat party promotes and God will rightly judge and condemn it.

[@laurabeane8862]

Google Maps has tried to murder me more than once 😊

[@donadeavera9608]

The final reason for buying our new home was that the entire area is all Trump signs, American flags, and veterans.

[@ROgletree]

And you can bet your ass when an emergency comes along they will be the first ones to help you out.

[@raij465]

Yes! I would feel so safe living there!

[@zenithperigee7442]

@donadeavera9608, must be one of those "Try that in a small town!" ♥ Trump 2024! America and the world needs him back in the WH!

[@1motomanic]

Now, that sounds more like a Utopia then the leftest version.

[@Omega_Mark]

Yup, go check out your new neighbors before you buy a house.

[@clardy01]

That laugh at “Merry Christmas everybody” made my day! 😂😂

[@HoustonRebel]

I know. His laugh cracks me up. It's contagious.

[@danielgodfrey4415]

Dont celebrate too soon. Hilary learned the hard way

[@NoixNoir-gu4fd]

Hillary Clinton is the official spelling. Now if you want to put in extra l's that would make sense 😏

[@igon5176]

About 3am one morning my two dogs needed to go out. Needless to say a skunk was in the backyard. If you’ve ever smelled skunk from roadkill…let me tell you, you are missing the real experience.

[@seandelap8587]

This was basic standard knowledge a decade ago the fact that someone is being applauded for saying what we should all know from play shool is a sad indictment of the world in 2024

[@turbopokey]

Can you put a time index so we know what you're referencing?

[@jonhaddican268]

People in glass houses shouldn't throw orgies?

[@Just_Pele]

100% on the guy's side, texting during a movie is just a sh-tty thing to do and I hope she learned a valuable lesson.

[@davidfinch7407]

I had a skunk come into my four-man tent in the Army, when I was in my sleeping bag; there was no way I could get out without a confrontation. So I just zipped up my bag and prayed he'd go away, which he did. My dogs, on the other hand, like to play with the little fellas. Two months later I can still smell it on them.

[@merryhineline7781]

A skunked dog is the gift that keeps on giving.

[@jtjames79]

Skunks will almost never spray unless they have to. They also keep other animals away. I would give them snacks to keep them around. There is even a breed of domesticated skunk. They make great house pets.

[@Nana-ru4uq]

Wash your dog in coke cola. It will supposedly remove the smell and doesn't hurt the dog

[@davidfinch7407]

@@Nana-ru4uq Next time (I'm sure there will be one) I will definitely give that a try. Thanks!

[@brrjohnson8131]

​@@davidfinch7407 my country cousin has pretty good success using Dawn dishsoap (removes the oil that helps the scent last) along WITH Hydrogen Peroxide. I've been called to deliver HP & beer after the event. I was impressed how well it worked.

[@maryf3219]

My Weekly Reader in the third grade(1959) said we'd have flying cars by the 1980s.

[@TexanTrad]

OMG weekly reader! We had those! I totally forgot about those until I read that lol

[@wilburrrrr742]

And instead, we now have..... toilet paper with wavy perforations between squares. 😔

[@bjbrown]

Weekly reader was a great thing.

[@DChrls]

What we ended up with was planes with folding wings, that can be driven on the road.

[@random__joe]

The technology probably exists but the gov is holding it back so they can profit from fuel monopoly on bulky cars

[@solvesmith]

Lolled hard at the "longest unbroken history of slavery" 😂😂😂

[@pythohoar]

as someone with a dog,... the cure for skunk spray is 50/50 dishsoap and bakingsoda...

[@jessemontano762]

that works?

[@davidfinch7407]

Someone else said, "try coca cola." If that doesn't work I'll try yours!

[@zeno5689]

Dish soap baking powder and vinegar, dog got skunked 2 days after we got her

[@davidcosta2244]

​@@zeno5689It's actually anything that neutralizes the skunk spray, and the old saying of tomato juice doesn't neutralize. Soda water, and baking soda could, though. Pretty much any acid, and base.

[@thepassportvisacompany9062]

Dish soap & hydrogen peroxide works great as well. Tomato juice does nothing.

[@AmandaAcorn-k1f]

I'm so sick of dates on phones it's so rude I'm glad someone sued hahaha

[@Readrose8]

100% sick of people staring at phones in public in general.

[@purplelove392]

When I was on Fakebook, there was a couple from our church who were constantly posting while out to eat. I told both of them they needed to put up their phones. Needless to say, they divorced. My husband and I only use our phones when on a date to research and enhance our conversation.

[@renegadetenor]

One person had to do it. I recently gave a backseat driver the "55 saves lives" treatment, for 4 hours on a 70mph two-lane. (in case you're youngish, that was the slogan in the 70s to 1986, when we were all expected to cross an entire continent at that speed-- on the exact same roads now approved for 80!)

[@NoixNoir-gu4fd]

A few months ago, some old guy and his wife cut in front of me abruptly and dangerously in rush hour. I tailgated them for 10 miles and let noone in between us no matter how many times they changed lanes or sped through a yellow turning red. The driver man was so shook by the time they turned off the main road his eyes were so wide his glasses were falling off his face. I was gleeful the rest of the day after they got out of my sight. After the first honk when they cut me off I did not honk or yell or gesture the whole time it was a masterpiece.

[@faithful451]

Upvoted for your really mature, based, sensible, honest commentary. Speaking the truth, saying when things are good or bad. E.g. the neighbours.

[@bigredmed]

$17.31? Consider that a tuition payment in the school of life. Got off cheap. She is not long term potential and it only cost him $17.31 to find out.

[@w1975b]

But he got it back. Don't know how much he paid to sue her lol.

[@nothing_82]

She shouldn't be texting during a movie anyway.

[@pauljanetzke]

Art is nothing more than money laundering.

[@debby8428]

especially if you blow paint through a straw

[@johnfriday5169]

Also, government grants for art aren't going to the best artists but rather whoever will fill out the paperwork.

[@alfredluk4715]

Is just a $500k receipt

[@richardmead5969]

modern art true

[@laurabeane8862]

Pop Music since the 1940's

[@scottroder5516]

Good gosh Rosanne nailed it.

[@sharongagnist6428]

I will NEVER vote chameleon

[@saltycat662]

Be nice to Cackala. She tries real hard to form sentences.

[@RoccoDiricox8]

@@saltycat662 ummm... Not nearly as hard as Trump does... Just saying.

[@angelamurphy6233]

Lmf

[@NotThatKindaKaren]

@@RoccoDiricox8Have you watched & listened to her, see her policies, know that Dick Cheney now supports her? Trump for peace. My first R vote. Boycott since 2016 after what the dnc did to Sanders & his supporters-We had 4 years of no new wars under Trump. That is why he is h8'd. the administration today has us on the brink of nuclear w*r. Dick Cheney is supporting Democrats cuz theyre the new war party. 😢 I didn't leave the left-they left me.

[@wesleypepple7525]

​@@RoccoDiricox8your trolling skills are very poor

[@user-eg2oe7pv2i]

cinema usually give warning before screening , like please close your cellphone , do not ruin others experience

[@nicholastormey5946]

God bless Rossane😂

[@daveh777]

Oh you are so right about when "Drill and Ceremony" goes heroically wrong.😅😅😅👍👍👍👏👏👏

[@BillNesselrotte]

Ty zed you make my day,best show, for mental health, you can keep us all sane❤

[@BrunesKitten]

I’ve been to two country club/golf course weddings. Both in the summer. Both times there were people playing golf. If you are going to have weddings on a golf course in the summer, then expect golfers! It’s par for the course! 😂 I’m sorry….. I’ll see myself out 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@katierucker2870]

Yeah, it’s on the bride and groom for making that decision. I personally wouldn’t want to get married on a golf course. That’s pretty lame.

[@wilburrrrr742]

Tieing the TV to the truck roof.... Tic, tac, toe. A winner!

[@w1975b]

tying

[@wilburrrrr742]

@w1975b Thank you so much. I struggled internally with the spelling of that word. I almost had a nervous breakdown. I'm so thankful that there are wonderful people out there like you to help educate a poor ignorant soul like me. You make me so glad to live in a world where I'm judged, not by the content of my thoughts, but by the buttons that I push. (And obviously, I pushed yours)

[@w1975b]

@@wilburrrrr742 and your ego is so big you can't take constructive criticism.

[@wilburrrrr742]

@@w1975b Spellchecker = constructive criticism? Who knew? 🤣🤣🤣

[@ApocolypseChild]

@@w1975b Apparently he takes criticism about as poorly as you take sarcasm. 😂

[@Majima_Nowhere]

If you can't go two hours without burying your face in your phone, you got some issues.

[@klacy5555]

Isn't there a dummy light for dump trucks that tell the truck driver that the dumper is up???

[@HubertofLiege]

The pto gets either left engaged, or always is engaged, and the lever, switch or whatever that raises the box is activated, by gravity or negligence. As they’re driving it raises slowly and they don’t notice, how they don’t notice is beyond me.

[@stevekirkpatrick1612]

There is the possibility of a failure in the warning system. Blown fuse, clipped wire, blocked sensor. Like a light bulb, sometimes things simply stop working with no warning at all, so it goes with vehicular "check" lights. Yes it's easy to say you wouldn't be so ignorant, but it is damn near impossible to live that out forever. One day your turn signal will stop functioning, just hope the driver behind you doesn't wind up smashing into you as a result.

[@stevekirkpatrick1612]

​@@HubertofLiege Light/nonexistent traffic. High probability this event occurred during the overnight hours. The only mirror checks occur when headlights appear. And let's not lie, we all experience road hypnosis at one point or another, regardless of our vehicle's size. There are many plausible reasons for this to have happened.

[@SandyDiVa]

15:15 Wait…the WAVE? You mean log flume, right? I have never heard it called “the wave” before 😂

[@NoixNoir-gu4fd]

Branded name at that park or park chain

[@mikelipke9404]

one time in Basic, we had a room inspection a roommate said something so stupid to the drill, he said he was dusting the ceiling, I couldn't hold it in, I laughed hard, the drill got in my face, hesitated, and started to laugh hard too.

[@wiggenvan]

What do you mean the art world has gone insane? It hasn’t been sane in our lifetimes

[@emosongsandreadalongs]

Dude, the doctor through the ages thing was awesome

[@johnkeenan1829]

On boy, another golf clip. Sure do love me some golf clips.

[@kentuckysparrow9846]

If shoes on the floor is art, I live in one of the finest museums of modern art known to man.

[@tomd.3082]

When I lived on land, on nights I got home late, I'd be cooking something on the grille and a juvenile skunk would come up on the patio and wait for scraps when I was done eating.

[@shelleykilgore1052]

If it was the woman who was suing, everyone would be cheering her

[@reignman30]

First the woman would have to pay for the date.🤣

[@pyrettablaze0414]

My bumper sticker says …. ‘Watch Out For The Idiot Behind Me’ 😉

[@NoixNoir-gu4fd]

Will purchase soon 😀

[@pyrettablaze0414]

@@NoixNoir-gu4fd gets em every time 🤣

[@USSResolute]

"He exaggerated about how much she texted." The $17.31 says that his lawsuit is not exaggerated.

[@lizlee6290]

Unless it's an emergency, not likely, texting ONE time is too much!

[@keithrigsby-je5ui]

PROUD of the guy who sued his 'date' for RUINING the 'moment'!!

[@JewlTonz]

I can surely attest to the laughing when messing up at formation in the military. My "buddy" and I were in the honor guard, and we both messed up so badly during practice, I practically broke a rib laughing!

[@jonathanshumpert9549]

I have only had to hold in one laugh at a military function. When I was in the U.S Navy, we had a command inspection in dress white uniforms. It was held inside a hangar that just happened to have pigeons in it. Just before the row in front of me was being inspected, a pigeon with the most accurate aim dropped a load on the guy directly in front of me just seconds before the admiral was going to inspect him. Some went inside his white hat, some inside his top and the rest down his back. It took a lot of strength to not laugh.

[@taun856]

I had something similar happen to me. I was stationed in Japan in the 1970's and we had an in ranks Class A inspection. Just before the Commander stepped in front of me I was bombarded by a passing bird. It was all over the left sleeve of my dress uniform. The commander looked me over and said to the Sgt Maj." This man has an Unauthorized decoration". Then went on to the next soldier.

[@jonathanshumpert9549]

@@taun856 I like how they always find things wrong. We had a barracks inspection when I was in one of my schools. Just before the inspection, they brought drug dogs though to check for drugs. Apparently, the dog did not have good traction and every room failed due to "Dog prints on deck."

[@merryhineline7781]

@@jonathanshumpert9549Legendary

[@taun856]

@@jonathanshumpert9549 In the Army we had to go through Inspector general Inspections. (IG's) They were a huge pain in the butt, and one part of them was a full open wall locker inspection, where everything had to be absolutely perfect. part of the pain of these inspections was the two or three months previous to them when you have "practice Inspections". Anyway. Our local IG was rather well known for carrying around a slip of paper with "an event" written on it, and when he pulled it out we were expected to perform the proper actions.His favorite event was "Fire". In my room, he pulled out the paper and placed it on my roommates pillow. My friend promptly pulled out a piece of paper that said "Water", placed it on the "Fire" and went back to the position of attention. The IG fumed at us for a bit, left and never used his paper trick again.

[@truthbebold4009]

​@@jonathanshumpert9549when I was active duty my buddy got married in his home town which was a couple hours from base. A group of us went to his wedding and we felt so horrible for our laughter. We gave our best effort to not make much of a commotion but it was futile. You see, Tommy Boy had come out in theaters recently and of course it was one of the funniest movies we'd ever seen. So, there we were sitting in a nice church where my friend is getting married and a song comes on as our friend and his bride share their first kiss and we looked at each other and covered our mouths to try and muffle the sound. It's not our fault someone chose to play "Endless Love". Seriously, the scene in the hockey rink with them skating and the janitor mouthing the words to Endless Love was still fresh in our minds and we just lost it 😬🙊

[@matthewtalbot-paine7977]

Oven mitts for gloves is hilarious. My best mate's mum used to take us to school and sometimes she'd wear a tea cosy on her head.

[@renegadetenor]

I use socks for running in the cold-- lightweight and warm, and don't really need my fingers until Track season!

[@LuciusFaith]

that silent golf celebration! pure gold of him for respecting the people who is trying to ruin his day by holding a wedding haha!

[@daves2753]

The movie guy dodged a bullet that lady has the crazy eyes.

[@sandy-pf9bb]

Years ago, our cat was sprayed by a skunk. We tried everything, nothing helped. He was pathetic, he couldn't stand himself. It took ages for the smell to go away, I dont think his courage ever came back :)😊

[@jerryadams6799]

How does a cat get on a skunks bad side? Normally, cats and skunks are best friends. clearly your cat is a wierdo. BTW you can get stuff from a vet or places like TSC or Bomgaars that instantly neutralizes skunk odor on pets.

[@seanleary7711]

She said she learned to be "more careful dating." Clearly, learning to be respectful of other people's time just isn't in the cards. She deserves to be single. Tyler called it "petty" because he thinks this was about $17. He should do some research about this old thing we used to call manners.

[@dustinhaus1165]

Decades ago. I told a friend that I have never golfed. He said I need to at least once, because i might be a natural, you never know. I have never golfed. Hitting a little ball with a crooked stick, and then walking after it just doesn't sound appealing

[@dennytate26]

playing golf just seems like playing fetch by yourself

[@michaelearl6991]

Golf is a nice walk ruined

[@openyoureyes909jones6]

No thanks on the golf, Im almost too lazy to get my darts out of the dartboard

[@wilburrrrr742]

FB marketplace has made me realize that the more I know people, the better I like my dog

[@sqweeeiguessidfkman7999]

13:50 He wearin those oven mitts cus he's about to COOK 🔥🔥🔥🗣🗣🗣🗣💯💯💯💯

[@NoixNoir-gu4fd]

-insert whatever the White version of a Rick Ross stylish grunt is-

[@GeoffryWK]

Theaters have a Phone Off policy.

[@TexanTrad]

Oh, that screen with like the very first cell phone ever made, or a Nokia, something like that, telling you to silence your phone like a PowerPoint slide? Yeah, that seems to be working really well. BRING BACK THE DANCING HOTDOGS! Who wouldn't listen to a dancing hotdog chorus line?

[@dog3y3]

Well, you obviously follow rules. Good for you. However, just because a sign is up, doesn't mean people will do as it says. That goes for drivers too.

[@w1975b]

@@dog3y3 there's an app that pays people to STAY OFF the phone (not text) while driving. It can tell when the car is moving.

[@davidcosta2244]

They actually have a phone silence policy, which means use the vibration function. This should be common sense to do anywhere in public, yet you have people talking on their speakerphones.

[@TheEngdan]

The marketplace thing is 100% true. kids think things from the 90s are Antiques and worth millions of dollars. they act like a 92 Cavalier is the same as a 57 Chevy

[@skootr924]

Halloween is the only time I compete against my neighbors.🎃 My wife does Christmas.🎄 Screw the HOA 🎯

[@daveh777]

It used to be called "power walking".😅 I went to a decent elementary school that taught us tennis and skiing on Wednesdays, but in like 1988 they added power walking which was not long lived, as a child's stride and an adults stride do not equivalate.😅😅😅 I did cross country skiing. Now I do snowshoeing cause it still gets me out there every day. But, ITS POWER WALKING❗NOT SPEED WALKING❗😅😂😅😂😅😂👍👍👍

[@TemplarMedic]

buddy of mine and I were hunting. I put on some bug spray and he was all "Im not using that, it has DEET in it". End of the day, I had zero ticks and he has over five.

[@lizlee6290]

You'd think a hunter would have more sense!

[@dianaklien1560]

But in 10 years who has zero cancer?

[@JasonH17]

@@dianaklien1560 jokes on you both have it because touch screens are found to cause cancer.

[@dianaklien1560]

@@JasonH17 jokes on you, computer using a mouse.

[@JasonH17]

@@dianaklien1560 you mean the mouse made of cancer causing plastic shooting out cancer lasers out the bottim?

[@CensorshipGenesis]

16:38 "...wouldn't the stove be lower! LOL 🙂

[@georgina979]

Amen, Rossane Barr!!!

[@reignman30]

She's no biologist so she can't be trusted xD.

[@KentuckyRanger]

I ordered a political sign for my yard. It says, "Vote For Big Foot!"...

[@reignman30]

First I have to know where Big Foot stands on gender. Does he believe it's a social construct or not?

[@Hat_Uncle]

Best sign I ever saw... "My neighbor is too dumb to vote, but they let them vote anyway. Go USA!"

[@kimdoes32]

7:25 neighbors up the road. One had a sign “veterans for Kamala” I almost choked on that one. Their next door neighbor had a trump sign. Few days later the Harris Walz sign got bigger, then their neighbor put up a huge Trump Vance banner. 🤣

[@WarpaintFTW]

Grandpa vacuum sealing everything is my husband in 30 years 🤣😍

[@ricksgaming7298]

I got a 350$ kureg for 20$ the other day at a yard sell. They had it for 25$ and I was able to talk em down.

[@Jayo2454]

Well done.

[@ricksgaming7298]

@@Jayo2454 thanks! It's the best deal I got in almost 4 years lol

[@cherylclick1664]

i call BS. no kureg cost s 350 bucks

[@elultimo102]

Did you get the refillable plastic cups, instead of paying for that over-priced little coffee in a shot glass?

[@ricksgaming7298]

@@elultimo102 I don't drink coffee and when I do it's instant coffee because I'm a heartless, tasteless basterd. This was a gift for the wife and it's one of the few things she loves so yes we do buy that overpriced bullshit. Edit: we had one for almost 10 years befor it died. Found this one at a yard sell just a few days after it died.

[@nannerl6243]

Oh my, I did that exact same art work piece on our wall when I was a kid. I was bored that day.

[@Mus.Anonymouse]

Lower the stoves.... Lower the stoves.... 🤣😂

[@aunaun6775]

Flag football quickly turned into Freeze tag when a skunk decided to detour on the field. All the kids stayed still for a good 20 mins while this skunk nonchalantly passes through. True story, I could hear it whistling! 😅

[@pyewacketkitty8404]

Hilarious that they called out Bobby Lee on that. Every culture that claims innocence should be called out. (FYI, no culture is innocent.) I'm also glad that he was a good sport about it.

[@reignman30]

Same with that earlier video about what country has never been colonized. They've all ben colonized or conquered but only the US gets blamed. Would everyone feel better if China or Russia colonized America? Because the natives were never going to hold onto all this land with sticks and stones.

[@andresgonzalez1236]

17:47 bro is about to get smoked by his whole platoon 😂😂😂😂

[@Rklong]

Oh yeah, he's gonna get a ass whopping for sure lol

[@tracycornish7011]

Good evening from Perth Western Australia 🇦🇺 it’s 9.55pm Tuesday

[@MrsShocoTaco]

So, what's the future like??

[@BJMauck]

Love the Aussies! Visited your country in 2019. Very friendly folks and fun to party with!

[@4FYTfa8EjYHNXjChe8xs7xmC5pNEtz]

Crikey!

[@kri249]

I encountered my first paralysis tick a couple of years ago taking a crap in some bushland. I wore only jeans and a singlet. I discovered it when I got home and sat down to watch a movie. I looked down and there it was, all tangled in my thick chest hair unable to make it to anywhere near skin. It's nice to know my God given gorilla suit serves a handy purpose 😂

[@NoixNoir-gu4fd]

Why were u wearing a singlet in bushland tho? Sounds like something contrived for a music video.

[@DRPowell]

For a second I thought you had discovered it ‘elsewhere’, considering your activities that led to the encounter!

[@TanyaRando]

The lawsuit for the cinema date leaves me torn, ok, it was petty to try to sue for just over $17, however unless it’s urgent, if you’re on a date with someone, stay off your phone - it’s RUDE

[@jeremybrooks7415]

She'll be surprised later, but she won't want the ring then.

[@otpyrcralphpierre1742]

It'll pass....

[@tysonyouts5011]

Unless her father is Gandalf.

[@tysonyouts5011]

You… shall….not.. pass!…… RUN you fools!

[@w1975b]

Tell her about it soon enough, she could vomit.

[@oldokieworkshop4460]

That vacuum bag clip reminded me of a KZbin vacuum sealer review I seen a few months back where a full grown older lady tested it with a couple slices of bread in the bag and complained when the vacuum sealer squished the bread into a dough ball. Too funny

[@gravdigr27]

My brother in Christ, let me explain to you how fb marketplace works. You always ask double what you actually want because everyone is going to offer you half of what you ask. Then if you get the clown that actually pays what you asked it's a bonus to cover all the people that no show when you drive 20 mins to a gas station to meet for the transaction.

[@n4ughty_knight]

Which is why I never buy anything online.

[@tysonyouts5011]

You ‘it’s free.’ Them ‘I’ll take it if you deliver it.’

[@TexanTrad]

​@@tysonyouts5011"can you throw in something else to make it worth my while?" .. but it's free 🥺

[@wilburrrrr742]

Can you hold that for me till November?

[@Olhufact]

0:18 the girl was like NOOOOO

[@costrio]

Only $17? I guess they didn't buy popcorn or drinks or did they go dutch. It's the snacks and drinks that are exhorbitantly priced, IMO.

[@alexiz.7569]

I laughed so hard at the radio today. They joked saying America has over 300 million people and yet the best two candidates for president they have is Kamal Harris and Donald Trump. The one is a communist and the other a grandiosity. I laughed so hard at this because it's true. Both are horrible