The Complete Karl Pilkington on Ghosts (A compilation with Ricky Gervais & Stephen Merchant)

[@jordanpudsygreen3998]

I cant be the only one to listen to Karl pilkington stuff with my eyes closed trying to go sleep, can I? I love the banter 😂 I must have listened to his KZbin stuff every night for 3 year , even the same ones more than once 😂😂

[@jennieconnor1139]

Every night!

[@redvelvetf.c.5088]

Jennie Connor every night

[@kaylareeds]

Yep.

[@kaylareeds]

Suzanne is a lucky woman if he talks before sleep 😂

[@gamertabny255]

Every night

[@caralea3442]

Putting a compilation like this together must be so time consuming, thanks, it's much appreciated!

[@markhomas2346]

Who said he’s put it together could have been unseen supernatural beings 👀👀

[@Madia367]

So then she left a comment saying thank you for making this compilation. But the person replied “I never made a compilation”.

[@Algorithm347]

Do you have a sister called dairy ? Or also know as dunkers

[@rhinovirus2225]

Nobody doesnt like Cara Lea

[@Renn13]

its not that hard, you just get all the clips and put them together, takes about maybe 30mins

[@DlcEnergy]

"she was a bog standard old woman, are we burnin, or buryin?"

[@TheMornal]

I love "You believe anything that you're told except when we tell you the truth." That encapsulates so much.

[@toml2988]

"somebody had wroted" 😂

[@veronica3986]

😂😂😂

[@steveowens4694]

Before every reply to a question, Karl always says " Errrrr....... " love it 😂

[@jdb79jdb79]

“It is three different people hassling him about a fire that didn’t happen, about a wife that didn’t exist and a cat that didn’t look happy”. Karl Pilkington

[@AA-hg5fk]

How do you explain that?!

[@highnoon7097]

Sounds like one of those beedles about type ghosts

[@angie311269]

I love that when he came downstairs and told his mam there’s something up there, she just said ok!?

[@AA-hg5fk]

Karl's mam believes in ghosts so she would have accepted it straight away!

[@paulcunnane4]

A lovely mum to have. God bless her.

[@foleyhuck2344]

The Mrs Battersby story is especially mental because a) Karl had to picture how old he would look in a photo to remember how old he was at the time, rather than simply remembering how old he was when his brother got married; and b) because he couldn't remember Mrs Battersby because he didn't think she was a ghost at the time, so he completely forgot *despite being told she was a ghost the very next morning*

[@leehackett1614]

To this day I use the “she was your bog standard old woman” when describing random people

[@AA-hg5fk]

when describing old women, I'd imagine!

[@drexlspivey5828]

Any time someone I know has passed away the time has been talked about, I have no idea why they find this so strange

[@youhustlinmeboy4989]

What time exactly?!

[@toppatoppa5236]

It's the way he said baby dead.. Ricky couldn't contain his lol

[@syok1107]

I always thought it was weird when Ricky and Steve made such a big deal of Karls dad asking at what time the neighbor died when told. That's like *THE* thing you do. It's a normal question.

[@adebolabloke6962]

It's because they interpreted it as "what time did she died?" Karl's dad clearly said "when did that happen?"

[@KillerDude1771]

Mrs Battersby

[@adamj6645]

A shadow was pushing people of their bikes.....I laughed and laughed.

[@jessicajayes8326]

7:30 Karl's story about the vampire is something that happened in Romania where superstition is still strong. Josh Gates investigated it, the "vampire" was just a guy who had a disease where the gums recede and sensitivity to sunlight. In some cases, the vampires were just infected with rabies or something. There are people who live as vampires, but Karl has very selective focus, making hilarious results.

[@Mark-qb8fq]

Extremely late reply but there's also a condition called porphyria, which gives agonising symptoms that can be temporarily relieved by drinking other 'normal' peoples blood

[@jessicajayes8326]

@@Mark-qb8fq That is one of the diseases associated with vampires.

[@AA-hg5fk]

​@@Mark-qb8fqthere are various types of porphyria, NONE OF WHICH are treated by drinking blood! Play a record!

[@untitledperson1776]

Vampire coverup

[@TekkerzOOT]

It was pushing people off their bikes. LOL.

[@Angel_HippieCityHealing]

This is the only one I listen to almost daily to sleep. I always listen to the first part and fall asleep with a smile. Hugs everyone💕✨

[@DarkAutumn3D]

"What's the connection 'ere?" Always makes me laugh 😂😂😂

[@charlesburns9729]

I just started listen to him and I’ve done it every night for the past 3 months…no stop in sight, I’m addicted

[@alandodd3184]

I love this. Gotta be one of my faves. All his ghost stories were always the best parts. That and the diary.

[@fraserwebster8761]

18:27 why does it just go to the next bit? Karl Is about to say “never mind your beard, where’ve you been for three days?!” Followed by an amazing Ricky bursting laugh.

[@benhart6183]

Ye mam and ye dad's!!; followed by'"hes done you again"🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@AA-hg5fk]

Agreed, poor editing here!

[@highnoon7097]

They censored it because it was too spooky

[@JasonX2]

This is such a gem of a bedtime listening compilation, funny and chill to get you ready for a long and cosy night's sleep.

[@SaoirseK]

"There's this shadow somewhere."

[@brucewayne2184]

Pushing people off bikes

[@blxtothis]

Oh boy, Yvette Fielding and the hilarious Most Haunted mob certainly missed a trick, a series featuring Ricky, Steve and Karl would be dynamite. I can picture the night vision shots now!

[@Big-Papa-Smurf]

The fire in the oven story kills me every time. That has to be one of my top 5 favorite bizarre things KP said. The oven fire cat, the "parrot's blood" story, the Loch Ness monster, the Owlheaded armadillo, the retired space monkey. Anything having to do with animals is KP gold.

[@RossShajahan]

What else is living on walls!?

[@RossShajahan]

What else is living on walls!?

[@Incandescence555]

'so who's going to do the cropping?'

[@LeafShade]

He was right, so many uncropped photos all over the place nowadays.

[@adambritain5774]

Karl has to be one of the very funniest men walking this planet. You could make a case for about 100 of his many stories and one liners being his funniest but the man-hole cover one is something else. He is grade A comedy gold and it’s just completely effortless.

[@burnsloads]

When he was in Petra and explained why he would rather live in a cave see Petra rather than wake up in Petra and see a cave; I knew he was a sage. He's Diogenes of Synope reborn.

[@justinwebber9968]

Burying people alive was an issue at some point in the past, they used to sell safety coffins for the well off. It had a rope system linked up to a bell that they could ring if they were buried alive.

[@29memyselfandi]

Hence the phrase “ dead ringer’....

[@SamuelBlack84]

So, if you were poor it's tough luck?

[@d1agram4]

The manhole cover thing is true.. just he’s a little off about it..

[@dejohann4274]

That's karl. Hes usually partially right but he embellishes

[@arigatuxful]

"Are we burning or burying? next! ha

[@ACinDorset]

What lake is the Loch Ness monster in? Classic - like What were those things in Gremlins called?

[@Sheriff_GrimLaw]

Andromeda Is Calling Or “that man who was in Forrest Gump”. x

[@nxgan1088]

The best thing is that Ricky didn't catch on that he was on about the Mogwai

[@Rachie-nj3oi]

What lake is the Loch Ness monster in?

[@d1agram4]

Mogwai .. but yeah funny anyways.

[@callumdixon3402]

The Pub Karl is talking about during the Derek Acorah segment is the 'Dirty Bottles' in Alnwick, Northumberland. The 'curse' is on the bottles, which have now been sealed between glass. I remember hearing this story a long time before this podcast was originally broadcast!!

[@AA-hg5fk]

it doesn't really matter as the story is a load of complete sh*t anyway!

[@Kaneth98]

Doctor yak for prime minister of the world

[@stud105]

Gervais is scared of ghosts. He's petrified. that's why he gets annoyed.

[@David-ud9ju]

No, he doesn't believe in them.

[@ryanhlfc]

David it's a reference to one of Karl's comments during the compilation. Stu D is just referencing it

[@jamesgreenldn]

I've never heard so much crop in my life

[@barbecuedsimsbaby]

Stop being a wewe!

[@SequenceKomplete]

@@barbecuedsimsbaby you must be chuffed you managed to use your new word...!

[@corbettobaggio]

“It must be a massive pain having a tiny tankard in a pub” is genuinely one of the funniest most under rated lines in all of these convos with the 3 of them 😂😂😂😂😂

[@cordovalark5295]

The manhole cover is actually true it just passed in front of several cameras during an atomic bomb test and calculations were done proving it was the fastest man made object. Of Course Karl got a lot of details incorrect.

[@Sheriff_GrimLaw]

Christopher Larkins Operation Plumbbob. x

[@PedloProductions]

You’re talking bollocks!

[@ivywoodxrecords]

Where'd you read that, in UFO data magazine?

[@raminybhatti5740]

"So, what you tellin' me for?" 😂😂

[@cmxfitness6577]

I don’t know how anyone can sleep with this on. Even if I do switch off from the conversation I’m guaranteed to be woke up by Ricky laughing. More to the point, I wonder what kind of subconscious damage this is doing listening to Karl’s theories whilst asleep?

[@TheSilentknight1520]

"Somebody wroted" has to be one of the funniest things ive ever heard

[@KardKing66]

I've never heard so much crop in my life.

[@barbecuedsimsbaby]

Dont be a wewe!

[@louisasmiles]

Did Karl ever update us on the shadow that pushed people off their bikes? Lol. He said he would..

[@highnoon7097]

He did but the tape mysteriously vanished. Coincidence? I think not

[@jayhag5481]

Because they dug up a body, liquidized it's heart, burnt it, and drank it. That's why they're in prison.

[@jaded9247]

35:35 Ricky’s funniest laugh

[@joshuacoomber48]

Brilliant stuff

[@BreakfastAtNoon]

Old people are scarier as ghosts when it comes to stories.

[@DJdevil319]

It would be so frustrating talking to Ricky snd Stephen about this things. Lmao Karl is so calm snd doesn’t seem to take anything personal

[@tedmurphy5516]

“Bog standard old woman” killed me

[@robertroberts2822]

Sorry...Sorry! I thought it was shite! I didn't know it was on the Internet!

[@PK-ch5gn]

"Who's gonna do the croppin?"

[@24flyingcats84]

The cat did not look happy! Amazing.

[@Bhappi137]

My cat has a range of facial expressions from very happy to extremely annoyed

[@fyphfoko]

why would someone need to write a note to remind them that their baby had died, and therefor they can ignore an entire shopping list?

[@livelifeincolour]

fluttershy pony Weird innit?

[@louisasmiles]

Therapy?

[@paulcunnane4]

Jeez!

[@ayou4525]

I have seen this I dunno how many times never gets old lol

[@masadragojevic2940]

26:05 theres a shadow somewhere

[@sawrirocks]

"It pushed people off the bikes!" Oh for fuck's sake.

[@masadragojevic2940]

27:35

[@SamuelBlack84]

All joking aside, my mum saw a ghost when she was young in her bedroom of an old man standing in the corner The next day, her mother told her that her grandfather died in her room before she was born Also, my grandfather was leaving an office in his work walking down a staircase and a man passed him going the opposite way Realising he didn't know him, he ran back upstairs into the office and it was completely empty

[@shaneshanks9702]

Who's listening to this who isn't from the uk ? ❤😊😮

[@johngilmore697]

Saucer drinkers all over

[@pt14930]

“Where am I going? Am I going down or am I going up?”

[@irlandy6200]

It cuts to new story at @18:27 a bit early.

[@misterbobby8913]

1:21:00

[@heleng6968]

If Derek Acorah was still alive he and Karl could have done a TV ghost show together I would have watched it (Karl sounds like a believer his stories are great.)😂

[@Fireproofwitchnz]

Well shizz, I didn't even know he died 😕

[@paul_walmsley]

'never mind yer beard....where've you been for three days?!?!'

[@magneticbears4612]

Karl's description of the high pitched noise is exactly how sleep paralysis unfolds.

[@Banaxor]

@Samuel Black My experience is similar to yours.

[@YouSmokeChed]

Or Mrs battersby

[@grease_monkey6078]

Never saw the man hole cover again

[@butlerchris67]

The Complete Karl Pilkington on Ghosts (A compilation with Ricky Gervais & Stephen Merchant) 66,666 views odd ...

[@SYKO666]

Weird innit😂😂

[@shangoddard1289]

I love these but can't work out how people sleep without laughing lol

[@mikemorgan3119]

There's a shadow somewhere!

[@Maglorfin]

Hilda lived her life a bog standard old woman who died at quarter of eleven specifically

[@Hellndegenerates]

The paranormal stories are the best

[@johngilmore697]

They scare me.

[@luckystar9239]

Somebody had wroted gets me everytime 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@leontudor3818]

Got up right close to it...... and somebody wroted.. 😂😂

[@StuHolland]

These are just amazing. Could you possibly do audio versions as podcasts? Would be soooo good for commuting

[@ryanhlfc]

Steve no

[@ChrisMoynihan11]

Thanks Yak!

[@arigatuxful]

legend!

[@MrBuch169169]

I'll go to my grave wondering what Karl meant by the manhole cover story. When did they EXPECT to see it again?? lol

[@MadCowMusic]

LOL it was picked up by several of the science people's cameras flying off at high speeds. He missed out on the bit that was supposed to be the interesting part where they worked out how fast it was going and proved it was the fastest man-made object ever.

[@FernieAriel]

15:10 just leaving this here for when I come back to this video.

[@FernieAriel]

35:28 the manhole cover

[@ericorourke7291]

I’ve seen ghosts. Big believer in that realm. I was 32 years old, we had just moved (few months) to a rent house that was probably 40 years old, not too bad in my hometown in Texas while finishing out my career in the Navy. My wife and I were sitting on the couch watching TV and we both saw something off to the right of the room, almost at the same time...then she looked back to me and with a look, and I said “little girl in a yellow dress?”....she said “ya, she was just there.” We weren’t scared, the little girl seemed very innocent and we didn’t feel threatened. My brother hasn’t been to the house yet, couple months go by and swings over on a Sunday to BBQ with me. He’s 36yrs old, kind of a gruff guy that works in the oil/gas business. I was in the kitchen unpacking the food to prep for grill and he yells out my name. I said, “ya what’s up I’m in the kitchen...”he said my name again, so I walk to the living room where he’s on the couch and I ask, “what?”. He said, “dude....you weren’t just in here? You didn’t just touch my shoulder?” I looked at him confused a little and told him, “ no man, I was in the kitchen”. He said “you’re not fucking with me, right?” I said... “no....ooohhh, did you see her? The little girl in the yellow dress?” With a pretty damn scared look on his face, he said “nah, fuck this I’m out of here. You got something wrong with this house”and walked out of the house. He literally drove off. I called him obviously after he left to try and calm him down but he said he knows what he saw and said no fucking way am I coming over. We had only signed a one year lease and moved at the end of it.

[@clebfelm4170]

Well... it’s all bollocks

[@thecoolestkidinkalkallo9621]

Eric ORourke shutup idiot

[@prog7141]

Cleb Felm You’ve got a shitty attitude

[@youdontseeanoldmanhavinatw4904]

Lmao

[@AA-hg5fk]

Don't talk sh*t, play a record.

[@CasperLCat]

“Her spirit was whizzing ‘round my bedroom.” - What ? “Well, it would have to be, wouldn’t it ?” - The Metaphysics of Karl

[@jamesblaser5329]

Thank yiu

[@adambritain5774]

I love 6:18.

[@AA-hg5fk]

18:33 - why did you just fade out the end of the 'alien gives man a beard' story before Karl had finished telling it? Disliked.

[@paulcunnane4]

I'd love to have had Karl's parents.

[@iknowyoureright8564]

I don’t know which one to plump for........

[@ilck-ym-blals7385]

24:58 ....First of all if they bump into Steve then they won't see much different ...secondly if they did meet karl although he's a great being there's not many like him! If any! 🤣

[@suge-8550]

I don’t know if it’s bc quarantine has made me drink for no reason, but how did I ever sleep to this without ever laughing?? 😭

[@Jeerioz]

Noooo. You cut out the reaction to “alien gives man a beard” 😩😩

[@badbadfull]

Why the fuck do I like this.

[@strugglebear]

badbadfull cause ur a badass

[@strugglebear]

Be proud

[@wartem]

I'm lucky me memory is bad because I can watch this many times

[@johngilmore697]

Do you remember Mrs Battersby?

[@andydurbs]

Superb

[@Dreamskater100]

I swear one of these days Gervais is going to blow my speakers. So frustrating.

[@dwingo831]

Please stop being so mean to Karl....

[@HerohammerStudios]

I love you, Doc

[@Duskaria]

Flies + Johnny = Badness

[@garyttomo1641]

hahaaa love em, 'well it's all bollox'

[@sean6663]

Gary T Tomo *bollocks

[@MrSkinnyWhale]

A load of bosswollox

[@brograb898]

Karl’s brain makes me reconsider all of epistemology.

[@lusiscus]

I like all these characters but I think the way Ricky and Steve keep putting Karl down for his beliefs is wrong. I saw a ghost once many years ago with a witness, these things do exist. I have also seen some weird stuff like the White snooker ball jumping up out of the pocket on it's own and back onto the snooker table. They shouldn't mock him just because they don't believe it themselves.

[@crashfistfight8234]

5643 Budgies have weak hearts ❓😂🤣😅

[@xxJaiden95xx]

1:06:30 Mancula lol

[@brograb898]

“Here lies Hilda: Bog standard old woman”

[@TheNinja691]

I’d love to see Ricky Gervais do a documentary of him on his own camping overnight in haunted places like Auschwitz for example. For the man that doesn’t believe in that stuff, I bet he’d 💩 himself 😄

[@TheNinja691]

@flat out heck proven? By whom?

[@TheNinja691]

@flat out heck science doesn’t know everything pal 😉

[@sawrirocks]

*CROPPAGE*