Yakuza Slander: Completionist Edition

ft. Majimo and Waltuh
Song is Majima no Majirock

[@dogman3075]

I have so much appreciation for CyricZ for making it even possible. Real life superhero.

[@syrupmancer]

Had the exact same thought yesterday while replaying like a dragon. There for me every single game on this series, CyricZ gamefaqs does not miss

[@YaMexicanBoy]

@@syrupmancer If nobody got me I know CyricZ got me Can I get an amen?

[@SnekNyx]

CyricZ carries the Yakuza gamefaqs section on his back. Living legend

[@manfredstorm7599]

God bless that man , absolute gigachad

[@MrBoggy101]

I made a gamefaqs account just so I could message him a thank you for his legendary guides.

[@TylrSolvein]

Pro tip: Don’t bother becoming a Yakuza completionist before knowing Mahjong like the back of your hand.

[@achair7958]

Can confirm, I tried to win one fucking round, not a match just a round, for like a hour on easy, and my pea brain still couldn't fucking do it

[@RoyalSap]

@@achair7958 I know right that shit is so hard

[@mehsido6750]

Idk, shogi is way harder somehow. Atleast I have fun with mahjong...

[@mattiasfigueroa9438]

@@RoyalSap mahjong is actually really easy, I learnt it to platinum like 4 Yakuza games. There's plenty of videos that explain the basics but most of it is just luck based, especially if you can't use the cheat items like in Yakuza 3.

[@ameeshb2038]

I play mahjong for fun.

[@chuckfinley1501]

You forgot to mention poor shinji bleeding out on the roof while we complete every other activity available

[@ashikjaman1940]

Babs watching Saejima spend 3 weeks genociding the local wildlife

[@ridark_]

@@ashikjaman1940 dude, that’s fucking relatable XDDDDDDDD

[@Crissaegrim-xv9cu]

Just like in Dunkey's video

[@Heyani32]

kaoru gets shot and needs help Kiryu: *Goes Golfing*

[@spuds_are_dope]

​@@ashikjaman1940Baba watching Saejima spend roughly 1.5 million yen on bear traps (this happened to me)

[@M3ganana]

As lego majima I can confirm that everything in that video is 100% accurate

[@azureskeith6417]

Lego Majima

[@lennyborisovich]

Lego Majima Lego Majima

[@evelin1006]

Lego Majima Lego Majima Lego Majima

[@FelleMemes]

Lego Majima Lego Majima Lego Majima Lego Majima

[@Sharky-j8f]

Lego Majima Lego Majima Lego Majima Lego Majima Lego Majima

[@MillenarMills]

Last one is sadly accurate, fuck that car chase

[@LightBoltDash]

Can't relate, They hated us MnK players for we excelled where everyone else failed

[@unityofvitality-5875]

@@LightBoltDash yakuza is perfectly playable on mnk idk why more people don't do it lmao

[@brianollivier]

As intentionally wacky as the actual tasks in any Yakuza game is, I envisioned that they never intended for people to actually platinum these games. At least that's what I tell myself every time I find myself curled up after hours of futile attempts.

[@RambleOn07]

They are just about the most Japanese games possible, they only want the worthy to be able to say they 100% completed the games.

[@MarceloZ2]

I read somewhere that this is in fact true and 7 was going to be the first to have an actually humanly attainable platinum, but due to an error when releasing the game in the west, the platinum ended up requiring you to complete the most difficult dungeon in the game (which isn't required in the japanese version), kinda defeating the point of the game being easier to reach 100%

[@h4rshturtle456]

@@MarceloZ2 7 was a breeze conpared to some old games or 0 anf 5

[@leonidas9808]

@@h4rshturtle456 No completion list for the platinum is op as hell, seriously fck mahjong

[@BlackPlatinum]

@@MarceloZ2 LoL they're attainable you just got put no less than 100 hours in each yakuza game lol. No life da MF

[@itzilia798]

Cant forget waiting 15 minutes in pachinko on yakuza 5 just for the game to purposefully fail you

[@Icantpickaname12]

Don't forget spending 50 hours trying to spawn honk honk npcs to max out Ichiban's personality stats.

[@simonetabacco1552]

Damn there are like 10839289192 more things you can do to max them🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@guilhermeandrade5903]

@@simonetabacco1552 it is needed for 100%

[@lowpolymay]

Nooo, you can do a Sotenbori fixed route to get briefcases. It got nerfed but it's still the optimal way to max out personality stats, and perma-stats once you upgraded personality to the max. Way better than trying to spawn those damn honk honk npcs.

[@simonetabacco1552]

@@guilhermeandrade5903 i know for that you just need to know the location when you start the game and diring those 50 hours you'll get them no prob, for the stats tho there are lots of easier ways

[@simonetabacco1552]

@@guilhermeandrade5903 i didn't even try and at the end of the game i had all stats al lv 9, now the fucking problem is the true millenium tower amd i want to fucking die

[@kamikaze4172]

It's not even slander at this point, just sheer pain

[@Crafting_hobo]

0:45 Best moment of the video! The syncing is truly beautiful.

[@Sonamyfan875]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[@FakeStrangepie]

Yakuza mindbroke me into kinda liking mahjong, and I wasn't even going for completion.

[@RambleOn07]

Stockholm syndrome ftw

[@CidGuerreiro1234]

The last one was the most painful. It was simply soul crushing to go over the entire restaurant and Lau Ka Long just to lose instantly in the car chase.

[@papieverett]

I think about this so often it hurts

[@gabrielpadilha8638]

@@papieverett I just completed the car chase today. I play my first run on hard and passed in my first attempt and also in my legend run passed on my first attempt. It was hard for sure but the car chase in zero seems way harder

[@Hiroakiarai88]

​@@gabrielpadilha8638you're crazy. Its the opposite

[@Sharkamfss]

​@@gabrielpadilha8638 Y0 didn't have the entire Soviet military's arsenal on a truck roof.

[@swaggymungdaal]

​​​@@gabrielpadilha8638 always shocks me when i see people saying 0's was harder lmao, just play both the games on legend back to back, K1's chase is like 10 times harder and it's not even close lol

[@prestongarvey6231]

100% 0-7 has left me a broken man terrified of minigames (thank fuck the dragon engine games are lenient on completion lists these days)

[@evzenvarga9707]

Mahjong completions are a dread and a chore to complete on the Dragon Engine.

[@theeverchosen1504]

The Kiwami car chase one hit hard, got to the part where Lau was easy as fuck

[@yusukeelric]

I had to use a trainer for the Lau level on Legend, I can beat lau with my eyes shut, but then there is the car chase and it wrecks me. No matter how good you dominate Kiryu on fights, that level requires 10 years of time crisis experience i don't have.

[@howardszabo2238]

Judgment completionists forgetting one cat and having to go back through 3 hours of saves to find it

[@definitelyhooman7939]

Everything here is so hyper specific yet I understand. I understand your pain. We may be insane, but at least we are not alone

[@elvispresley8168]

Man, fishing in 3 was toughest than most boss fights

[@sirizalot]

I literally never had any trouble with it?

[@MrBoggy101]

My eyes watered up from not blinking and my heart was pounding by the time I caught the tuna after a literal 15 minute battle.

[@erikkaioh9422]

That first tuna is the hardest, but if manage to catch it, the next ones is a breeze as you learn the pattern

[@mrlaidback83]

Yakuza 3 is my least favorite to date, so much so that I didn't bother to complete all the mini games.

[@irvancrocs1753]

@@mrlaidback83 Yakuza 3 is known for being underwhelming in that part tbh, maybe because it's the most outdated compared to other main games (Excluding 1 and 2 ofc since they got remake). I really wish they try to make Yakuza Kiwami 3 and modernize the game..

[@diIlon3735]

I feel the pool and prison break segments on a physical, mental, and spiritual level.

[@diedforsomemilk7774]

That car chase scene in kiwami was an absolute pain to go through. i failed it 11 times before i finally got it down.

[@melancholiclonging8641]

I was able to complete it with literally one hit left for both kiryu and the car before dying and I was sweating after I completed it. I don't know why it was so hard compared to the one in 0.

[@diedforsomemilk7774]

@melancholiclonging8641 I think it's cause of the huge damage the people do to you and the car and how you need to do it in a certain way, have good accuracy and use heat eye a lot or you'll lose and the fact that if you fail, you need to do the entire chapter again from the start. In 0, it's a lot easier, and it saves right at the start of the chase so even if you fail a lot you don't have to waste 10 minutes fighting lau ka long for the 100th time.

[@creamrabbit1203]

01:26 "Oji-san, why are you so bad today?"

[@huckonaaa3832]

nah bro i got mahjong easy after watching a 3 minute video but to this day shogi fucks with me in a way i can't describe

[@thatspookagain4030]

If you struggle with shogi on the competition list here's what you do: Go to shogi parlor in kamurocho and speak to the guy at the front. He gives easy shogi challenges that help you learn the game. Repeat the first challenge over and over again because it still counts as winning.

[@RougeHimbo]

@@thatspookagain4030 thanks bro, time to platinum hehe

[@coolwolf506]

What's the video called

[@SeiyaTempest]

Most of the mahjong completion struggle is because it's somewhat based on luck. I only barely grasped the basics and managed to get by eventually.

[@mydogeatspuke]

You and every other one of us 😁😁😁😁😁 I can't count the amount of times I was like "hmm, do I try to finish this triple or this one" and dropped a tile before getting the tile I would have needed to complete it, or at the start I'd decided there's no way I'd get a double because of the tiles everyone else had already dropped and the odds of me getting the 4th were so low, only to get that one rare tile right near the end instead of the one matching the one I held onto. Or how many times I called riichi early and someone else called ron on the last tile as I sat through the whole thing darting my eyes to each player hoping they'd drop the tile I needed. Also, calling a closed riichi in wareme because I didn't think I'd get the tile in a draw (since AI will never drop the tile you need in open riichi) and then getting tsumo so I could have done it open and kicking myself. Game is so stupid, but fun though! I also like the animals and ribbons picture game I forget the name of. I never get the flowers, and they always steal the moon. Rude.

[@HaymeisterII]

went from knowing nothing about mahjong to becoming a mahjong grandmaster because of yakuza

[@TenYearsInTheJoint3417]

The pool in yakuza 3 was by far the hardest trophy requirement I’ve had to go through

[@ashtonrobinson-clarke3834]

Because of that one sidestory in Kiwami 2 I don't want to hear the word Mahjong ever again

[@blues4509]

0:10 this is incredibly painful to relive

[@msm3150]

Fist of the North Star: Lost Paradise completionists trying to max upgrade every talisman

[@DarshanBhambhani]

Completing Hostess mini game in other games: 😊 Completing hostess mini game in 3: 😢

[@Saber_Lover]

Don't even get me fucking started in the cat fights

[@cs82271]

0, 7, and K2 are the only ones I've completed so far. The others I dread, especially the legend playthroughs. I can't even imagine trying to do Judgement without the essences/incenses.

[@Solaire_of_Astora13]

The catfights are the worst

[@CelestialLiving]

that part with Shin Amon, my youtube literally freezes and it just jumps to the next slander

[@angelical6068]

Every time I finish getting a Platinum on a Yakuza game, I always come back to watch this. It brings laughs and tears.

[@jasonolmez8688]

Just re-watching this vid and I'm currently blind playing the judgement games and the jack b nimble one got me, that guy was insane 😂😂

[@MessedUpBrainspike]

This video keeps calling me out. Again, and again, and again, and again.

[@DTPandemonium]

Once you 100% all yakuza games you end up becoming a mahjong grandmaster

[@Micfal]

All the hours spent on 100% were made worth it by this video

[@KepoEmperor]

After learning mahjong, I realize my true enemy in completeion list is fishing

[@SnailMan63]

I actually really started to enjoy playing mahjong because of the Yakuza series. I still hate it after playing it for hours on end but I always enjoy it for the first few games or so.

[@seththeawesome3366]

As a Yakuza completionist who only had 7 and Lost Judgment to go, these recent announcements have made me feel a lot of things

[@kamikaze4172]

Yakuza 3's mahjong completion list broke me. I had 44,000 points in a round or two. I was golden. First place, in the clear. Then hat felt like 40 rounds later, match was up, I placed last with 20,000

[@mydogeatspuke]

Isn't it the first to 50k can choose to end and win? That's how it seemed to work in Judgement. One hand to 40k is pretty meaningless if so.

[@dinokkun]

That last slander is so true. I never played Yakuza Kiwami, but I suffered in a similar way with the Chase from Chapter 7 of Yakuza 3

[@Trigonaart]

As a newcomer to the franchise, current playing y0. 1:00 that part made me laugh the hardest i can

[@THENAMEISQUICKMAN]

That final one hit really hard as that car chase is literally the only reason Kiwami is the only mainline Yakuza game I have never beaten on Legend

[@juniorthelivinglegend7904]

That last one hits so hard. That dumb car chase😡😡😡

[@zackcvfair]

God, I love this game series so much.

[@tonyjoestar2632]

I laughed at the pool table one, but got ptsd about that fucking car chase

[@saemitatsuya8419]

I did the Kiwami as my first Legend difficulty on NG+. Car chase is hands down the hardest part.

[@gel6865]

0:27 NAHH CUZ I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR SUGIURA IN THAT PART 😭

[@gott712]

This video hits too close to home man...

[@AwkCrafty]

That like a dragon one is too fucking accurate lmao

[@rasher7826]

I literally went on an arc with Mahjong where in the beginning I had to look at a guide every single game to where now I just straight up know how to play Mahjong

[@lucyburns4379]

I'm mad about the first Yagami slander being accurate.

[@MidnightLobster7]

Imagine if you will, nearly fully completing Yakuza 5 but not being able to 100% the Completion List because you're missing a material for crafting a single item. A material that you get ONCE from a Saejima HUNTING quest and NEVER AGAIN anywhere else, not even the COLLESIUM. And you've done the quest but the material is missing so you can't do it. Yeah, I hate my life too.

[@detectiveblutomindpretzel2324]

Tell me what it is. What item is it?

[@MSaint]

I took the last scene personally

[@cyborgtoad]

yakuza kiwani players going in and out of convenience shops trying to force idol majima to spawn

[@SagawaGaming]

1:21 thanks for reminding me how fucked I'm gonna be

[@breadburner7276]

bro i remember seeing this before playing judgement and thinking i got spoiled with the suguira part

[@rikimaruazuma9925]

That last one hit the most fuck that car chase in k1 bruh

[@sprunkmansprunk3369]

Can’t forget sango Amon in 5 (only applies if you don’t have the extremely sturdy pole)

[@GUNKSHOTT]

0:31 1:26 😭😭😭

[@DzzyKyle]

I absolutely adore these games, but whever decided Legend mode gets no checkpoints is a very cruel individual

[@justinpenuela]

Dood, I fought a fishing line in Yakuza 3 for 20 solid minutes only to be cucked by the end when the “fish” turned out to be a fucking UMBRELLA!!!

[@CrustyEyelids2]

Peerless tile is the item that saves us all

[@Moister356]

Liu Ka Long on Legend Mode can be used for torture purposes

[@WrdToMymfTimbs]

That last clip is so true it hurts

[@Sarnahanfi]

Legend mode is brutal

[@thatspookagain4030]

In yakuza 0 it was p easy, tho that car chase had me fucked up

[@getajobmate1281]

Yakuza players learning multiple entire traditional games just to get a platinum trophy

[@RambleOn07]

Funny enough, it was the baseball minigame that broke me and killed my completionist tendencies.

[@bmrdc1635]

Don't forget the nightmare that is Puyo Puyo in 6 and Judgment...

[@cringeposting435]

This resonates within my soul.

[@rawrdino7046]

Thanks for reminding me why I'll never do these

[@Kirusei]

imagine failing at Yakuza 3 fishing couldn't be me

[@stellardong3866]

Based mechanic understander

[@sirizalot]

Seriously, it's not hard. Just keep the tension gauge in the middle and you're golden. Give some slack if the tension is too high, pull the rod in the opposite direction that the fish is moving if the tension is too low.

[@blusterkong4556]

Having beaten the Y4 prison escape last week, that hits hone

[@caruusel]

my kiwami platinum came with free headache and the ability to tiger drop Lau Ka Long with my eyes closed

[@yusukeelric]

you will never complete shinada sidestory because some sadistic hell spawn decided that to become good at Baseball you have to become good at the most busted pool minigame ever made.

[@Kara-de5cz]

POV : you play Kiwami 2 and arrive at the last bouncer mission

[@cunosthepear5112]

0:32 oh sh it’s cali tiger :))

[@idkwhattoputhere1991]

If I see another goddamn car chase sequence in the yakuza series I will have a fucking mental breakdown

[@julianarbelaez2928]

Ok... I did the car chase on my second attempt. Yes, in legend. And yes, i loved yakiza Kiwami so much.

[@hulkhooligan2241]

Holy shit the lau ka long one hit home

[@adamski4735]

That fucking Akiyama 100 deathmatch took YEARS off my life

[@cap_junn6397]

That last one hurts me

[@elimulvihill4126]

Judgment, Lost Judgment, and Like a Dragon players committing rampant adultery

[@joaquinbarbosa3904]

I'm SO glad i got into mahjong before going into the Yakuza games

[@ragnarhenchbrok]

great vid - spot on

[@Taichi_Suzuki]

I feel the song in my veins

[@sjjdfiwnz]

mahjongs actually fun when i learnt it

[@krazykombatant]

I've platinumed and 100% every yakuza but dead souls (someday) and I have never felt more seen

[@grey4g]

The car chase in kiwami was a fucking drag

[@Ticketman99]

Shin Amon also has the power to make your video buffer lmao

[@monsoonofthewindsofdestruc5686]

The last one hits different

[@OnDavidsBrain]

Mahjong, took it down with practice in the first one I played 0, Pachinko however, GIVE ME CANCER NOW GOD!!!

[@hussain3290]

Last one is true pain

[@jiyama]

Majima no Rock❤️

[@xxarcangelxx143]

My greatest enemy in 0 was disco dancing.

[@helikopterhansel6122]

Oh I am feeling that last one 😭

[@fungustheturd4004]

I legit watched a 4 hours long video about Mahjong basics to learn how to play that thing, now I’m addicted. Now the same can’t be said about Pachinko, f*ck that shit

[@supercar_spotter_2565]

I am going to experience the last one and it won't be easy

[@ZekeHair]

last one is brilliant