When someone steals your credit card and uses it to donate to charity

[@ThiagoGlady]

Child: "You are like the dad I never had." Chastity: "Well, about that..."

[@jw8160]

😂

[@RADSIKEGORILLAGEM-pz5qr]

Wow

[@SHUBHAM_PRASAD]

😂

[@orangeinkius7257]

He says his name is Timmy like five times dude why is he just "Child"?

[@ThiagoGlady]

@@orangeinkius7257 Because i have short term memory

[@taylorgray1667]

Chastity will always be the most hilarious stripper name

[@SaHaRaSquad]

Especially when Chastity does charity

[@hamzamotara4304]

Prudence and Modesty also seem like candidates.

[@charlesaston6546]

Does Chastity wear a belt? 🤔

[@louisrobitaille5810]

@@charlesaston6546 Doesn't have to if she can control herself 😝.

[@pineapplesaucedaboss]

it's got tity in the name

[@raymond-andrade]

100% thought I knew this was going, till the end

[@Zayd-bg1pt]

Member I’m guessing?

[@JCel]

​@@Zayd-bg1ptPatreon

[@SAULlST]

@@Zayd-bg1ptthey dont have the member icon so.. dont know how they got early access

[@past-tense-of-draw]

I’ve honestly never been more shocked by a plot twist in my life

[@SaHaRaSquad]

Every time I watch one of his videos

[@KavinKrishnaswamy]

I love the "How can I make you smile today" line it's really funny.

[@EEEEEEEE]

E‎

[@BewareTheLilyOfTheValley]

Former call center agent here...god, I hate having to say shit like that. Or, your supervisors scream at you in the most aggressive voice, "SMILE AND DIAL!!!" Ah yes, that will make me satisfied with my job, totally brushing the facts that we're over-worked and under-paid under the rug, or that we take calls for scammy ass companies that suddenly vanish from our roster without so much as a notice to everyone about the change and after being cussed out by customers for months because of said scammy shit (little word of advice, if you have to keep defending something as not being a scam...it's a scam!), and every year, we're made to make political phone calls and if we decide that we'd rather just do our regular calls and stay out of politics because we didn't sign up for that shit because this was supposed to be a CUSTOMER service job, not political shilling, we're threatened with termination. But make sure that you SMILE AND DIAL!!

[@TheDarkCeratosaurus]

WAIT A MINUTE IK YOU

[@Song-by-AI]

Is this the guy from the discord

[@TheDarkCeratosaurus]

@@Song-by-AI yes, it is

[@ivanbluecool]

Zach: I'm broke. The charity owes me money now.

[@EEEEEEEE]

E‎ ‎

[@quaktoons331]

His bank account is negative

[@gutsmasterson2488]

Why do I see you everywhere?

[@Robert-qq3ol]

​@@gutsmasterson2488 because of these things called eyeballs I think

[@lunaric5508]

Never thought I'd see you on a Zach vid or even a not-fgo-ralated thing tbh

[@ShiMusume]

Zach went so far for this one. He made himself so broke for the bit he needed to have his news anchor speak into tide laundry detergent.

[@wrathofainz]

Lmao. I hadn't noticed that, despite it being bright orange.

[@Mohenjo_Daro_]

I thought he was flaunting his wealth XD that shit's like $20

[@LastbornOfGwyn]

@@Mohenjo_Daro_ Flaunting his wealth... by speaking into detergent and not idk lets say a microphone? what

[@Mohenjo_Daro_]

@@LastbornOfGwyn It was a joke about how expensive laundry detergent is here

[@saver_spenta_mainyu]

A comedian actually giving credit to the original creator and not just blatantly ripping them off without a care in the world. I never knew such a thing existed

[@jonathanshepherd5515]

Zach Star is a hero. That's why everyone turns to him in times of strife.

[@josephpostma1787]

​@@jonathanshepherd5515Espwetialwe whittow Timmy.

[@bobdagranny7431]

@@jonathanshepherd5515 one might say he is able and willing to help

[@croazzb3525]

​@@jonathanshepherd5515he is always able and willing

[@AristotelianEpistemophilic]

​@@jonathanshepherd5515 he is both able and willing

[@shadowsoulless6227]

I just love the idea of Zach just sitting there with the phone to the side of his face in silence staring off into the distance for a solid 10 minutes while he just puts the audio clip over the top of it in post. Lol

[@jayde4872]

True

[@Luna5829]

it seems like a freeze frame lol

[@ducksongfans]

​@@Luna5829nah he blinks

[@Luna5829]

@@ducksongfans i mean its also possible he recorded like a 1-2 minute long thing and reuses that every single time

[@Luna5829]

@@ducksongfans also it's possible to freeze frame and then cut into a blink every few seconds

[@Vainary]

Skit idea: If calling 911 was like calling tech support

[@androidaxolotl8311]

This needs more likes.

[@whothefrickareyou8106]

"Have you tried turning him on?"

[@rebecca8866]

Yasss

[@GunSpyEnthusiast]

" 911 what's your emergency " " There's this creep that's been following me around for at least a block now " " Have you tried turning him off and on again? " " I think that's what caused the problem. "

[@kv5917]

I support this one wholeheartedly

[@Low88]

I was not expecting that ending

[@reasondro]

Usually I always have understood Zach's skits, but this one sadly my RNG-based baboon brain did not. Could you elaborate 😂

[@MartijnMuller]

​@@reasondroChastity was the stripper from the beginning he has fun with regularly, and is also the kid's mom. That's how his credit card information was stolen.

[@reasondro]

@@MartijnMuller OHH that's why. Right, thanks dude

[@DownWithBureaucracy]

"Do I seem like a good person?" This is the correct attitude here

[@IBeSirius]

"Why the fuck are you answering the phones"? is diabolical 😂

[@pchtommy1268]

3:11*

[@cortster12]

I'm poor and losing 5000 dollars would cripple me, so I'd be guilt free getting that money back. I need to live too.

[@TheMonotonePuppet]

Losing 5000$ would put me 4400$ in debt. I would be taking that money back (with a huge amount of guilt) but I would be taking it back, and promptly!

[@pathetic2399]

Same. Absolutely guilt-free lmao

[@Dionysus626]

Everyone's a utilitarian until it comes time to actually put it into practice in any way. Then everyone's an egoist. (Just not an honest egoist)

[@cortster12]

@@Dionysus626 I'm whatever "do what you can to help others within reason, unless it puts your life at unnecessary risk" is.

[@MarieLaurent-me1zl]

Yeah but John Johnson couldn't have been that poor if he's a regular at Sapphire's.

[@Geonarnia-k1s]

Man that sofa has been through so much.

[@theonebman7581]

That sofa is the underrated hero of this channel, he deserves a biopic

[@BlackTomorrowMusic]

Why? Did JD Vance sit there?

[@whom382]

@@BlackTomorrowMusic Well, he didn't "sit" there....

[@Ariel_thenotsolittlemermaid]

Honestly, if I called a charity and they put a sick child on the phone to guilt trip me into donating more, I won't donate just for that.

[@a64738]

I have had phone call almost like that after I did the mistake of donating... They called and tried guilt tripping me into paying them again with "think of the children in horrible pain", and all I did was laugh out a genuine belly laugh loud at them, they did hang up after that and never called again...

[@laxminarayanbhandari855]

@@a64738 Holy bro that's cold 💀

[@SaHaRaSquad]

@@laxminarayanbhandari855 Nah that probably saved them 20 more calls. When I stopped donating to a charity they kept sending me letters for 3 years. They likely spent more money sending me stuff than I donated in the first place. Never make a donation that requires your phone number or address.

[@Diaphat]

​@@a64738 You... I like you.

[@nutshotking]

​@@a64738spill the charity org name.

[@trevorcorreia6396]

He was willing but not able to donate to a cancer charity organization

[@timothyvenable3336]

I think you mean able but not willing to

[@ericdierolf8929]

To be fair, strip clubs are charitable donations to single moms 😅

[@minoth]

@@timothyvenable3336 both, actually. He is not a good person so he is not willing to and he is also not able to since he got rent to pay :)

[@R_samurai779]

Both capable and capa-willing

[@iamthehype3684]

​@@ericdierolf8929lmao

[@TobiasClips7734]

This is actually one of his best sketches, no scratch that, one of the best sketches, no scratch that, one of the best pieces of fiction to ever exist.

[@SiMeGamer]

How much did you win from the scratch ticket?

[@Bee-eautiful]

@@SiMeGameri hope 5k, so that he can spend them in a strip club -or to donate to charity-

[@mcrain1283]

69th like

[@anim8dideas849]

Probably he top three sketches it's crazy to think that he just did math videos

[@JLinggirl]

FYI, scammers do this often to test if a stolen card is valid.

[@weeblordgaming6062]

Why would they donate to a charity first

[@JLinggirl]

@@weeblordgaming6062 their websites often lack good fraud protection

[@rendomstranger8698]

@@weeblordgaming6062 Less likely to get marked as fraud and they can pretty much donate as much or little as they need to without any serious risk of getting caught. Additionally, plenty of people make fraudulent charity donations because they think that once the money is donated, the charity doesn't have to give it back.

[@Falcodrin]

​@@weeblordgaming6062to make themselves feel better about the fact they are about to ruin someone's life

[@anondimwit]

@@weeblordgaming6062you won't try to refund

[@jason_v12345]

2:13 "Do you need to stop Timmy?" "No, no, this gives me purpose."

[@MysticalyAutistic]

Yes that was said in the video. I also have ears and appreciate you helping those watching the video without functioning ears

[@jason_v12345]

@@MysticalyAutistic When people quote a line from the video, the implied comment is, "Did anyone else think this was funny?"

[@alexis-b5j3p]

​@@MysticalyAutistic if you don't like the comment don't reply to it just ignore it instead of trying to ruin others day

[@jpppe]

@@MysticalyAutisticthanks for adding nothing to this comment

[@Loirn-onajourney]

@@jason_v12345 when people make comments like mystical it’s implying “I’m unhappy and seek validation so I’m gonna put others down when they’re validated or get more support than me and I don’t personally think they deserve it”

[@Fanhalo]

I like how all it took to cure cancer was $5000

[@JZsBFF]

In a country with a decent healthcare that would be quite possible. In America, however, not so much.

[@darlhiatt8136]

You know how long it takes for a workin' man to save $5000?

[@mcrain1283]

government be like: cure 100,000 children: ❌ build a jet: ✔

[@pathetic2399]

@@JZsBFF Unfortunately, cancer doesn’t care if you have decent health care or not lol

[@JZsBFF]

@@pathetic2399 No sure about the point that you're trying to make.

[@JoshWebster327]

I was really expecting him to be ok with the donation the second chastity was on the phone

[@williamlancaster5136]

You clearly don't know zach

[@jw8160]

@@williamlancaster5136that wasn't Zach, that was John Johnson. Zach would be able and willing to donate. 😋

[@Youonly_dieonce]

Was chastity not a boy 😭

[@user-scott-pearce]

I hope Timmy pulled through, he provided me much laughter

[@YourUltimateStarGazer]

Imagine a sequel where the kidnappers kidnap john johnson because they want in on that 5k too LOL

[@LucianDevine]

Then they find out that he got the refund for it, and are outraged, because he's the real monster there!

[@lukemeck]

That ending was absolutely Gold!!! Oh man! That was amazing

[@gavinburns2165]

Yes!

[@TheDanishGuyReviews]

2:41 The "I'm done with this already" slap got me good.

[@willkoestner4159]

Crediting the premise. I really respect that.

[@OutlawJJ80]

Timmy Johnson has been reunited with his daddy. LMAO

[@a64738]

I have actually had phone call that went something like that because I did the HUGE mistake of once donating a small sum to children with arthritis. They called me on my phone begging for more money and it was very similar to this phone call with they speaking "think of the children suffering horrible pain", to that I LAUGHED loud at them, that is how cynical I have become, they did hang up after that and never called again...

[@tirsden]

Yeah, I was giving a small amount every once in a while to a fund for hospitalized, disabled veterans. I'm low income so we're talking $10 here, $20 there. Eventually saw a thing on charities and how a lot of them take most of the money as "administrative costs" and give almost nothing to the actual needy people. So I looked the vets one up... estimated 90% administrative fees. Some poor vet was getting $1 to $2 of my gift at best. Would have been better to just take cash to Walter Reed myself. Oh, and I had to threaten the "charity" with harassment charges to stop calling and mailing me slips because they wouldn't quit.

[@ferwend719]

0:22 what's this greeting, joy from inside out😭😭

[@User-8395]

The phone slap on the face never gets old

[@knickohr01]

When I saw the title, I thought: "How does he come up with stuff like this???" And to my surprise, he actually explained that it wasn't his idea and told us where he got it from. Well done!

[@markgaumee]

Zack Star, the king of cliffhangers.

[@brianback3865]

That sketch was a true work of art. It had it's ups and it's downs. It kept me on the edge of my seat. What a wild ride.

[@vxz223]

"Get... that shit... off ma card." 💀

[@lakersontop24]

Not bro eating while this all went down 💀

[@gavinburns2165]

That's your fault 🤣

[@homesteadgamer1257]

"Do I SEEM like a good person???" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@SethanderWald]

The tide container as a microphone really sealed it somehow. 😂😂😂

[@tc6818]

Second only to Angry Cops using a plastic canteen as a microphone.

[@IBeSirius]

The silent blank stare that he had throughout the entire bank process of identifying the strip club as being the unauthorized charge until figuring out that it wasn't, had me legitimately in tears. 😂

[@cryptoooooooo]

The fact that you give credit for the premise deserves major respect 💯

[@mrgameseeker02]

I lost it at this part 3:50. And it just got funnier. Props to this man and his creativity.

[@prigoryan]

4:27 "the new face of childhood cancer"🤣

[@dial-upking]

That customer service rep was way too helpful. UNREALISTIC! lol.

[@getoveryourself2212]

“why tf are you working the phones” lmao

[@Pengs_love]

4:24 there’s a microphone I haven’t seen yet

[@DarthShadie]

"Don't worry about finishing in your pants." Now I want Zach Star and Lonely Island to do a Jizz in my Pants sketch remake. 😂

[@thevoid11223]

Able and Willing... real

[@truthlessofshinovar]

Dude I almost fell out of my chair laughing. The ending was so hilarious. Seriously you are one of the best comedy creators, just in general not even just yt and Tiktok. Thanks for the rofl

[@gargamel679]

Just wanted to let you know that you make a difference. I was sitting on the toilet with constipation, trying to shit really bad and i started watching this skit on my phone, which made me laugh so hard i actually shat myself. Thank you.

[@jasonpcrawfordauthor]

I really appreciate there's no cut between the credit-giving Zach and the skit-playing Zach.

[@piusdoe8984]

already lost it at him confidently saying, get that sht off my card! lmaooo, i thought he'd at least apologetically and hesitantly ask for the money back

[@SleepyBear_SB]

The fact that John knows who the mother is by just a few words is great

[@Vis_tacita]

I love sam morril the algorithm hasnt shown me his vids in a bit. But now i know why your blunt style seemed so familiar and likeable.

[@ashindnile]

I watched the Sam Morril special because of this, and expected it to be very similar to this sketch, but on there it was just a passing mention of a joke. This sketch takes it to 100!

[@sayrejoseph]

Something is wrong with me man this is my new favorite skit 😂

[@worldsokayestcatdad6798]

LMAO ... plot twist at the end LOVE IT!!!

[@Izurag]

"No, no, this gives me purpose!"

[@thiagodeandrade7081]

Funilly enough, I read on Bluesky someone mentioned that scammers used his card to donate money to a well-known Catholic charity among other expenses. The card's pense said he only reported the fraudulent donation with the other fraudulent expenses because he feared the credit card company would later use any omission as an excuse at court If things ever came to it.

[@skylx0812]

"Hey, kid. Do you need dial priest for last rites or anything?"

[@sideslash6938]

this was just genuinely funny in all aspects

[@jordanvictoria5]

Timmy is sick!😂 He answered the phone coughing. What kind of organization is this? Then I remember all the commercials from Children’s Funds that showed and interviewed starving children.

[@Ridlay_]

I love how understanding the fraud department guy is. He's just chilling, and way too good at patching in people very quickly

[@Samantha.Leach8]

I was laughing out very loud the whole time, great job. I experience this at LEAST once a month and you perfectly encapsulated what it's like. I feel seen

[@abhiramas2004]

Zach is a true g to credit Sam

[@kanjo4976]

John Johnson really is a saint

[@inevitable934]

'"Chastity?" *Hello Zepp starts playing*

[@0opsb0y19]

You had me in the second half! 😂

[@daityme2093]

Ayeee good shit for giving props to the original joke idea. Respect went up 100%. 😭😭 I also love how he just snapped into character right after that

[@thehippie3610]

Considering EVERYONE'S SSN just got stolen recently, this is topical.

[@Salman-os7pr]

This is hands down my favorite skit of yours!

[@PomadaGaming]

3:43 lmao oh no

[@PomadaGaming]

4:51 looooool wow

[@waleedkhalid7486]

Ok that plot twist was epic.

[@Diminsonsam]

Thank you for telling everyone your inspiration it was helpful and I wish other people did that

[@polreamonn]

Let it be said that John Johnson was willing and able to make a dying kid's dream come true.

[@Funtwistedthings]

I love the bait and switch in the beginning

[@Bee-eautiful]

for some reason the "do i seem like a good person" makes me laugh way too much

[@㘭]

Timmy saying the menu is HILLARIOUS

[@purple4395]

Its allways valid to refund something like that. YOU first then anyone else.

[@TheGoldenApex]

That was one of your best skits ever, but also NAHHHH THAT WAS WILDDD😂😂😂

[@DoubleJinx]

"gimme my money back"

[@tytool2385]

I know someone that had this EXACT expirience😂

[@zcnaipowered7407]

When charity owes you money

[@LordJunes]

GOLD! Dude that Video is Pure Gold! xD

[@mrofnoctonod]

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Brilliant! So well written.

[@sidroberts7960]

That twist was amazing.

I like to think there's actually 4 Zach Star's and they really did improvise this whole thing

[@antonionnam6594]

The chastity in the end though!!😂

[@FyeniRetroBaby]

I felt depressed and as equally amused watching this

[@narliehs1648]

I died at the "please listen carefully as our menu options have changed" bit. 😂🤣 No they haven't!

[@martianbandit6912]

i was hurting with john Johnson all along the way lol

[@CrazyGamingYT56]

Love your content keep up the great work

[@kaledoublescope]

the way he got into character after the credit oh my gosh

[@Rkay421]

I like how one of the sick kids is answering the phones cause that was his dream lol

[@Paganini-Liszt]

the plot twist at the end

[@seb_the_cat]

“But you know what we can’t extend? Rent!” 😂😂

[@lilblondiebear]

Well, since you brought it up, Cure Sanfilippo Foundation is in dire need of funding. Sanfilippo Syndrome is basically dementia in children; it's really bad and it's always fatal. There's currently no cure because theres not much awareness, which equates to little funding, which shuts down their clinical trials and I actually can't handle any part of this being reality. So, I've devoted my life to spreading awareness of Sanfilippo syndrome, as well as annoying everyone I come across into donating to the Cure Sanfilippo Foundation. (I'm being hyperbolic - but honestly, I'd do anything to see this horrible disease gone forever, and my dignity and pride are an extremely small price to pay so, here I am, hoping to stir the heart of whomever happens to be reading this.)

[@Animanarchy]

They are known as houses of ill repute for a reason. I haven't trusted any since I spent the night at one and they refused to return my deposit in the morning! Said they'd already thrown the rubber in the garbage. Unbelievable.

[@MsDarra]

Bro this pissed me off so bad 😂😂😂😂

[@Ultranger]

Those last 5 seconds of the sketch were an insane twist

[@madjazzer4272]

Bro that twist was amazing

[@Tential1]

You're too good at this