As one who also has spent their whole life existing in the chasms and depths of my own mind, I find relief in finding word that I am not alone in the escape and pitfalls that it brings. We few, who are blighted to believe that we just never grew up... but I do not think that true. Our inner monologue, our ideas, ideals and richness of our private worlds is how we understand and make sense of the world around us. It is how we deal with hardship, settle emotion and relieve ourselves of the restraint and decorum that defines our presence in the real world. The danger is when you fail to perceive the potential for a problem. The lure of the escape beaconing to you, drawing you in because it is easier than feeling, confronting, dealing. Why deal with reality when you can deal with it oh so much better within? Succinctly, cleanly and with the wisdom of sages. Why leave yourself vulnerable when the greatest retort you will ever make is but a moments escape away? I fear that you feel that it has become a problem for you, at least of the moment. That your rationalisation and introspection of the world is becoming an excuse to hide from it? Or at least you have within you a panicked fear that it is. But this is good. It is healthy, you are challenging the status quo. Embrace it. Only you can make the call on if it is a problem, and if it is, do not be afraid to seek counsel. There is help if you need it. But you are not broken, you are not immature, not some wistful Peter Pan who refuses to grow up. If you try to deny who you are, cast aside that which you need to process the world around you. You will break. Slowly, surely, but you will break; for your inner world is every bit as much of you as the poetic beauty of your mind and the flowing depth of your feelings. Try as you might, you can never detach those from who you are. I know because I have tried to deny it myself under the guise of growing up. I did it and in the end it made everything so much worse. I hope your sadness was as fleeting as you tried to imply and I hope that you are okay? If it is of any solace to you at all, take it from one who is, in many ways as you: you are not alone. You can still be all the things that you want to be. You need to find your own balance, your own rhythm. Don't be ashamed or afraid of who you are. You are not crazy, your mind is not defective and you are not broken. Just make sure to keep coming up for air. Try to experiment with ways to find a direction for your inner discourse so that it drives you towards your dreams rather than acts to keep them at bay. The grandeur of your inner world, a word in which you lead, excel and experience every feeling is the juxtaposition to a reality where each and every one of us is trying to find our own way across the same playing board; each with our own roll of the die. Our worlds just lets us consistently roll a higher number, or even cheat and roll again. Yet life doesn't have to all be about rolling sixes. Success, joy, happiness can just as easily come from a two, a three or a four. It is so easy to miss that truth when you are the architect of a world based upon fives and sixes. It doesn't mean that the nuance, the heart or the lessons that you've taught yourself over the months and years that you have spent exploring those internal spaces are without value or merit. From those boundless journeys you know your limits and so keenly understand your own feelings as an expression of the true power that lies buried within you. Now all that is needed is to cast aside the desire to hide that version of you, so cocooned within, and to grasp upon every opportunity let her out and to tear a few strips off of a world and two's and three's for a change. 😉 And besides... I bet you have some really good stories from in there; if only you could be brave enough to share them.

That October lull from the drudgerous norm of the descent of Autumn was to me almost a cathartic surprise. It cast off the glumness at the turning of the season and, just for that week, the world seemed interesting again; new and unknown for the novelty. The hastening descent of winter need not be a chasm of needless reflection. What is to be your goal? You have such depth of skill and flair for the visual. I for one would be very happy to hear more of your wisdom over these dark nights as we are subject to the performant melody of November squall. ... though for future reference: "Vlog #15 | Lilian screws on a bed (Vol1...?)" was the title you were looking for 😄

This video made me feel really sad. I genuinely hope you're not struggling. My grandad used to say life is often like waiting for a ship at the airport. I never knew what he meant until i got older 😂 blasting positive vibes your way pew pew pew 🫂

Hello. I just happened to stumble across this video today. I wasn't searching for anything in particular, then here it was. I don't normally watch v logs, but I found this video to be very relaxing and enjoyable. Thank you for sharing this day in your life with us!

We are old souls.

This video is so real, and love the editing of it! So proud that you did break out into nature! Just came across your channel :) new subscriber! ❤️

You have the most idealistic beautiful life ever. I envy you xxx

I love your life 😊 can I share it with you ❤️🙃 I found you on boo x

some people are fuck ugly at least you pretty , life can't be that bad to you

Nothing wrong with having a world of your own.

The decision trap of the perfectionist daydreamer who plans everything meticulously in their head first, yet is always left grazed with the bite mark of a universe that just won't comply to our perfectly choreographed expectations. One often wonders how anyone ever managed to get anything done when the universe is so.... uncooperative in the face of our efforts. You have exposed some innately personal aspects of yourself here, it is nice to know that it isn't just me. From a fellow daydreamer, at least, one who was cruelly forced to pseudo-reform, may I offer you but one piece of advice: don't ever change. You are richer for your inner world and in its absence, your soul will never find the freedom you might imagine it will. Chinese dumplings? Always better fried than only boiled! I guess we'll see you in December... you realise that when they say that you have to post regularly for the KZbin algorithm to kick-in, 6 months wasn't quite what they hand in mind, right? 🤭🤣

So beautiful

Thank you for your video.

Very beautiful, it must have taken an age to edit! I liked the cracking of the ice as you stepped on it, even if I did have a momentary pang of vertigo, thinking you would fall. I enjoyed your recent, frank ND blog post too. I hope that you are able to find the clarity that you seek. I understand the appeal of labels, taxonomies, that need for insight; said the fellow HSP.

This is so beautiful! I love the shots of flowers and plants covered in frost!

What is it about frost and winter that makes it so fascinating and wonderful? It's cold, wet and dead and yet it draws me in, grows its roots deep into my soul and will always be my favorite season. As long it isn't just a long, wet, nasty spring-fall (which it has been here for the past 12 winters) -.-

Really helped me calm down. And you're an amazing film maker. Thank you so much for this vedio and words❤❤

Beautiful video, very touching. Sometimes we fail to see the full picture of things, solely because we look too closely. I wish you good luck with everything. P.S. I love your close-up footage 😍

A lovely video and the countryside looks lovely. I love your peaceful and tranquil style. So poetic. I think we are all living with the scars of the last few years and many of us will continue to for many more to come. It is all too easy to fall on personal routine, tropes of ones own personal defences. Especially when we are ill, or our options and ways forward are limited. I fall into myself, find a project, preserve my focus. You've got to do what you must to survive, to overcome the hardships. Don't lose hope. Don't lose faith. The drone sounds exciting! You're at Castle Rising there aren't you?

you’re a very skilled videographer! you’ve impressively captured the emotion through film, truly a special skill.

Every movie you make just ... hits right. Dunno why or how. Just does. Also jellie about that drone.

You get your flightiness from your mother, who ever she is. 🤣😂

So you know that we will now be waiting for "My first attempt at rock climbing" video now 😉

Just perfect.

Hi Lily, long-time lurker, first time poster. I hope that your thoughts are continuing to linger more and more on happy memories of Luna and that your absence from KZbin is a sign of good things and not the grasp of the sombre predicaments that life seems so carelessly to be thrown our way.

So cute

My bunny only pee on my bed ....😑

kzbin.info/www/bejne/mJ-6n6Siaqythpo

My rabbit is fully grown and she peed on my bed. The next day she just peed on me

Ohhhh bebé conejin 💞💞🐰🐰🐰cositaaaa bellaaa

I hope the kitty had a comfy life. I have a kitten named George, he's a year old!!!

You're confused about what's going on. The bunny marked it: it's their bed. You're intruding.

Small cute baby, awww hello

yehhhhhhh

You make great videos. Keep it going.👍

Wish I could come!

Very thoughtful vid , feels kind of wrong to thumbs up someone's loss , thoughts are with you.

I miss her so much. Thanks for doing this Lily. xx

Thank you!

Yummy

Beautifully and artfully filmed

I really enjoyed you visuals, the integrated music, and of course the 4 legged folks.😀

Beautiful video Lily.

Loved the Autumn feel of this :-)

Excellent video , looks like it was a great cruise :-)

Stunning visuals. Will follow your journey along the waters. Lovely dog.

Beautiful Footage, why aren’t my trips so graceful?

Well done, Lilian.

Is that an otter or a beaver at 2.50?

Lili love the shots basically underwater and that transition in the beginning and the sunset ... Giving me summer vibes ✨😍