043: We Reveal Our Scariest Nightmares

[@RM13741]

When Shane talks about things in singular form like “look up red panda” it always makes me laugh

[@Allie-r7s]

Please don't ever get rid of this podcast. I need it to survive my Mondays.

[@katherinel3399]

The sausage man saga is the best part of my day.

[@thenegativoneify]

Noo more sausage!!!!

[@bryanhikes7248]

You should read sausage man in the voice you use for are you scared! "So.... are you sausage?"

[@Bumguk]

😂😂😂

[@duhneelo]

Should give Matt his own mini video feed, a PiP if you will

[@deadskinconsumption]

The story of Ryan being late for the convention sounds like the video they play before Netflix comedy stand ups when they’re racing to the stage and then they walk through the curtains as the video comes to and end haha

[@junebabyLV]

my favorite podcast. you guys do not understand how essential this podcast is to getting my monday workdays started. thank u

[@RoyChamorro666]

If the hot daga came back, that would be crazy

[@AntoinettexKitten]

I think buzzfeed owns it

[@patrickoconnor6893]

Almost as crazy as Ryan asking for it

[@Knowsy_chaos_muppet]

An obvious foe is: Professor Relish! His tagline could be, "I can top that, Sausage Man!" (With or without comma.)

[@ImekaSF]

Ryan in the first two minutes is basically me in every meeting these days, lmao. What a mood.

[@calliope720]

One of the best parts of the Sausage Man Saga - The SauSaga - is the love in Shane's eyes as little Ryan's stories become dumber and more unhinged. He's so proud

[@T.Florenz]

It's so cool to me that TMA is a sponsor for y'all! Also, hell yeah more sausage man!

[@CaptJackSwallows]

Shane saying to watch lord of the rings like a TV show is best though ever dunno why I hadn't even thought of it like it's simply brilliant and yet I bet it works

[@jazminf1364]

i look forward to monday mornings just for this

[@1.-._.-._.]

Shane saying “I wonder what the weather is like now” when it’s been 104 in LA the past few days. You guys left at the best time

[@Laura-zj4tj]

I can't believe ryan is advocating for a hot daga comeback. Ryan blink twice if they have you at gunpoint off camera

[@patrickoconnor6893]

He must really hate sausage man if he wants the hotdaga to take its place Lmao 🤣

[@norsemaiden1108]

My husband nearly degloved his ring finger a few years back (he had pain in it for months after) so he got a really cool silicone ring to replace the gold one. One less worry.

[@rosequartsdraws8155]

I look forward to this every week, Its become so apart of my life if it were ever to end it would haunt me like memories of an ex lover

[@JessicaGuzman-u1d]

Loved the vibes this episode They were absolutely losing it over the sausage man story 😆

[@sarahsheldon668]

Good morning everyone! I watch this in the mornings while I’m getting ready. Thanks for all the calm mornings!

[@zuzanakalaberova4827]

Amazing episode of Sausage Man! Pretty please Shane can we have a crossover with the Hot Daga? 🥺

[@StargazerApril]

I had a recurring nightmare for years where Bob Saget stole my home and john stamos let me move into the house across the street and we teamed up to get my house back from him. He killed my entire family and we wanted revenge. John and I never won, but we built a family together. It was really weird.

[@endless_del]

i know you said it was a nightmare but thats hilarious

[@PoodleDoodleDo]

I'm still flabbergasted that the Magnus Archives is a sponsor. I'm so happy y'all are talking about it's so good

[@likabigboi6195]

At work right now, the start of my work week. Alot.of the time i DEPEND on these podcasts, or mystery files or whatever from you guys that make me laugh. Love all of you guys☺️ Thank you for all of the smiles and laughs 🙏🖤🔥😎💯

[@SgtStache94]

Sausage Man might as well have been watching Indiana Jones. "Bees... why'd it have to be bees?"

[@marwood9285]

steven talking about the dreams where you're going through your whole day and then have to ~actually~ wake up - i see you bruh. i slept through quite a few classes when i was at uni that way

[@kaitlyngallegos3792]

Adding to the list of things people do while listening to this podcast, I’m an optician and I am pulling frames to put new sku tags on them for price changes

[@meaganbellinoski7983]

Sausage Man's nemesis should be Girl Fieri. Guy Fieri's evil twin, who is also a foodie chef, but wants to cook and eat all of the Sausage People, like...as bad as Cruella DeVil wanted a coat made of puppies.

[@cosmic_user]

aaah yesss greatest pod intro ever

[@mwatson7474]

more sausage man - new hot dogga would be amazing! the mini animal idea reminds me of when Sarah wanted to have mini hippos from the puppet history hippo burger episode/spy episode. what animal would you want to me miniaturized?

[@thebibliophilegirluk]

I’ve already listened to this on Spotify while I was cleaning my apartment. And now watching it to fall asleep to. Love you guys. Can’t wait for ghost files this Friday!

[@jakeingle54]

The LOTR books actually explained away the eagles plothole. They don't like to fly over lands inhabited by humans because they try to shoot them down. The humans are pretty preoccupied by the end of the story though. Additionally, way less eagles show up at Mt. Doom than would have had to carry the entire Fellowship. Gandalf is shown communicating via moth too, which takes care of the apparent dues ex machina.

[@jackroberts4361]

Couldn't the eagles just avoid Gondor on the way to Mordor? I also think 4 or 5 eagles could easily carry 9 people, especially with 4 of them being Hobbits.

[@jakeingle54]

@@jackroberts4361 I think you're severely underestimating the weight of a hominid compared to a bird. Humans also exist outside of cities and we were the most capable and dangerous predators even before we even invented bows and arrows. Some Native Americans would harvest eagles using a cleverly dug and baited pit that would allow them to jump up from underneath and do the deed barehanded, just because they held it sacred and this method prevented blood from being spilled.

[@teethiief]

THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES MENTION OMG

[@olegschmidt7171]

LITERALLY, WHAT THE FUCK

[@art_and_aesthetic]

the way ryan looks at steven when he talks about the youtube video is LEGIT❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤😂😂

[@blackscreenstories3704]

I have a reoccurring dream that there's a invisible demonic force in my home and it I can feel it but not see it.. and it levitates me and sticks me to the ceiling like a magnet. I'll wake up soaked in sweat freezing... it's probably fine😂

[@imnotnancyrofl]

POV: you're a glow in the dark star

[@sarahg2533]

When Matt said Chocobo and no one knew what they were my FF heart broke 💔😂

[@zoelloyd676]

I watch the extended LOTRs trilogy once a year in one sitting 😂 it's incredible!! Sausage man FTW!

[@jenniferreynolds2832]

Pygmy mammoths would be the cutest domesticated animal

[@Sarah-hm2pe]

00:49 omg I almost choked on my food Matt lmao 😂

[@rosaeaton9538]

Steven, my ex, had the same thing when he would dream a full work day every night - eventually, he got a bit hazy about what was real and what was dream, and I took him to the docs. They said that this occurs in people working too many jobs/ too many hours. He was a support worker, a successful illustrator, and in a band that was doing well - so he essentially had zero downtime. He took a step back from the different projects, and it stopped. Highly recommend allowing yourself to rest.

[@biabiabruh]

Ryan's visceral reaction to hearing that someone wants bears domesticated 😭

[@heatweve]

are you telling me ryan bergara had a saga surounding a sausage man and he had the nerve to criticize the hot daga

[@shelbayytaylorr3012]

ryan fumbled the bag on saying “hostages” instead of “saustages”

[@sleepdeprivedstorm]

37:09 ryan i have this dream all the time! it even changed when i moved to the uk for a bit and stopped driving -- in my dreams i would be driving my american car on the uk roads and constantly ending up in the right hand lane by accident just out of instinct. terrifying ☠️

[@jackroberts4361]

Sausage Man needs to show up in the Hot Daga revival as the retired hero they need to recruit.

[@karan_puuung7687]

29:46 👏I did Matt... I did

[@MasonMenzies]

Flying to LA from Vancouver tomorrow. Excited to watch you guys live again!!

[@kristycargile6917]

Twist...Tucker was actually Ryan's imaginary friend, and the first ghost Ryan ever saw! 👻

[@michomochiii]

Sausage man saga is perfection! 🤣🤣

[@Kitrichor]

As soon as the question was asked I said red panda! Glad to hear theres agreement in the watcher squad!

[@knorman717]

Steven, for your wedding ring, you could try the silicone rings that joggers wear. They’re really bendy and don’t get stuck!

[@maddiegogal7481]

It’s quite often I wake myself up saying something in a dream out loud! My sister across the hall and I laugh about it bc I’m usually saying something so insanely random

[@docsaico]

I have a recurring nightmare where someone is chasing me - usually a muscular, very angry man - and I’m trying to hide and I get into a building and slam a door and go to lock it and the door doesn’t even reach the door frame. And the person is pushing on the door trying to get in, and I’m trying to scream for help, but no sound comes out and I can’t breathe. 😫

[@nitarahettiarachchi3642]

i hope the sausage man comics never end 🙏

[@LiinaTarvis]

can't wait for "Adventures of Sausage Man: Beevenge" in the comments

[@RegularFlyGuy]

“Jackie Sausage this!” Might be the coldest line in history of comic books

[@joshaman8260]

Man of the House is so good I love you Shane (it can hold up if you believe)

[@kaytea0963]

Crazy I saw the notification for this upload after waking up from a nightmare

[@hotmixAC]

Have to get these Sausage stories animated!

[@youcare_somuch2433]

*Crazy Lord of the Rings fan reporting for duty!* The eagles couldn’t have flown the Ring to Mordor cos they would’ve been seen immediately by Sauron and shot out of the sky. They were a definite threat to Mordor whereas Sam and Frodo-little hobbits who can be pretty much invisible to “the Big Folk”-would be an unexpected secret weapon. The hobbits passed into Mount Doom unseen on foot, if they were on eagles they would be a giant red flag in the sky. Also Tolkien’s short answer was “shut up that would be a boring story” lol

[@R3cKi7]

30:33 you could say, its for your....AMUSEMENT 🤣🤣🤣 watcher life

[@winterskulleton]

it's been a few times that fruits have been mentioned in relation to top 5 beatdown and i'm so excited to see if they've finally done top 5 fruits!

[@LordOfJonix]

I love that they keep referring to the sausage man drawings as photos, like it's a documentary

[@alaenamarie8702]

This installment of “Sausage Man” made him lose a little of his street cred 😬

[@jospodigeeves]

YAAASSSSS THANK YOU, I LAUHGED SOOOOOOO HARD

[@Chubby_Runs]

I’m sad nobody caught Ryan’s joke about relating to Turning Red

[@TribbleChow]

SAUSAGE MAN. SAUSAGE MAN. SAUSAGE MAN.

[@Radicalpickle]

I've actually had my phone die out on a solo trip, literally thousands of miles from home and my phone just stopped charging. I ended up having to buy a new phone just for the remainder of the month. Next trip, I brought that same phone with me-always have a backup plan

[@prof_parahelix2390]

Final Fantasy 8! I love that one, gunblades make no sense but they own bones, they're so cool. They're in the MMO, FF14, too.

[@Sprouts5463]

In the Galar region of pokemon they use Corviknight as taxis I think Steven would love one!

[@matchamat7939]

Here's a worse one for you: there's a Swiss soccer player named Paulo Diogo who was celebrating a goal he made, he got so excited he jumped over a fence, his wedding ring on the finger got stuck and ripped off the entire finger. so. yeah. be careful with them ring fingers

[@JoanaSilva-vx6vo]

YES SAUSAGE MAN

[@migukdevan]

I'm in South Korea and it's still boilin hot. Hotter than Ryan's passion for ghost evidence...

[@wudz_fpv]

Man that Garth Brooks thing has been a soundbite on the H3 podcast for sooooo long and I finally get the reference now lol

[@jackroberts4361]

The Jeremy Renner app fell so Garth Brooks Facebook could fly

[@soar813]

Not really a night mare for me but, my grandmother on my mums side passed away but before that day arose, i saw fire works shooting by then another one shortly after, i saw a white mist fly past my window screen unrelated to the fireworks and it was pitch black outside, when i woke up after i slept that night i was told she had passed. So it's very eerie how all of that lined up

[@johnploss3096]

The bee had so many Saus-tages!

[@Tiredcryptiddd]

the ghoul boys talking about the magnus archives was not on my bingo card for 2024 omfg

[@finch3035]

I once degloved both my middle fingers by getting them caught on a wall, my middle school didn't care enough to call my parents and just bandaged me up and sent me back to class, even though I was bleeding through the bandages.

[@Leanndra9]

“I’m just a stressed out boy” needs to be a t-shirt.

[@SophiaStar4444]

Enjoyed this sausage man segment..

[@RoryBardory]

It is so weird to hear a Magnus Archives sponsorship lol fantastic show, just weird to randomly hear about it 😂

[@sarahalbanese1300]

As I was typing out red panda Shane came in clutch

[@robinsmith5442]

I think there is something wrong with my brain. Steven looks like he's larger than Shane and Ryan!

[@robinsmith5442]

Or in a separate video and a lot closer. 😮😮

[@blackscreenstories3704]

it's the lens they're using and Steven's position is closer to the camera..

[@barbehrhart]

Please don’t be offended, but I listen you old Watcher podcasts to fall asleep to. I think there’s something about hearing words that keeps my mind from racing. I also fall asleep to British history videos and my husband falls asleep to physics videos.

[@sucha_shocker]

This is why Ryan hated the hotdogga, he felt plagiarized 😅

[@yessi00p]

Yall talking about listening to meditation to fall asleep. Meanwhile I like to listen to this while I fall asleep haha

[@kelluja]

I like talking about my dreams. I just had one of my worst dreams ever last week. It made me throw up my breakfast when I remembered to think about it, so I'll tell about an older one. I was at my parents', standing near the front door outside at night. I heard some muted music from the street, knowing right away it was coming from inside a car, maybe one of its windows slightly open. I was curious, so I snuck closer, for some reason, heading towards a garbage can situated between the street and a spruce. Soon, I also recognised the tune I heard. It was the opening theme to Martha Speaks, in Finnish. I was now close enough to the trash can to open its lid. As I reached my hand forward to grab it, the lid flung open with force. A person, like a shadow with no features, jumped up to stand upright, immediately aiming a shotgun at my head. I took a single step back, then got shot point-blank. For a brief moment, I saw myself from the outside in all the gory glory before my vision started to fill in with pixels. A few long seconds, and then all I could see was static noise. I felt like I was about to faint. I knew my body was dead, and my consciousness was to follow. My mind was crumbling, becoming one with the all-encompassing static. I remember thinking, "This is the end. This is all I could give and be given, and that's that." I was scared but somberly accepted my predicament while Martha Speaks played faintly in the background. I woke up, gasping for air and sweaty all over. After a few bewildered seconds, I laughed out loud. What a dream!

[@Becky_Croft]

46:40 I am so upset with these new potential Final Destination style injuries oh my god...

[@joelrobinson3381]

sausage man my beloved

[@guyonabuffalo5714]

My boyfriend moved out of state shortly after I got an apartment on my own for the first time. For few weeks I would “wake up” multiple times sometimes with him then we’d do mundane tasks. Some layers I’d wake up without him and he looking for him. After hours of “waking up” with varying layers I’d wake up exhausted alone and uncertain of what chores I actually did. Fucking exhausting

[@CyphersPryde]

Ive always wanted a raccoon not TECHNICALLY domesticated, though I've seen plenty of people who keep them as pets, I just love the little buggers

[@courtney104]

sausage man brings me infinite joy

[@leahsspamaccount375]

F-ing love sausage man

[@AleahJanelle]

Omg I also always have the car not stopping dream.

[@TearStreak]

attack of the peacocks!!!! omfg i can't wait 😂

[@nathansamson8215]

I’m getting a weird thing where I’m running and I get too much momentum and stumble forward for blocks lol I live in the city and usually I’m leaving a bar in the dream

[@1tskoffie]

Shane madej looks like the grownup version of the backpack kid

[@RaquelCairns]

Right on time 😎

[@kevinkocjancic]

FRED'S SLACKS IS A WINNER!!!!

[@1donutatday]

Someone get these men silicone wedding rings please