10 Simple Ways to MELT a Man's Heart

[@Mat_Shaffer]

QUESTION OF THE DAY - what ways have YOU found to melt a man's heart that I may have missed?? Let me know in the comments! → Sign up to get access to my weekly email exploring love, life and relationships you won’t find anywhere else here 👉 www.matshaffer.com/

[@barbaralebrun438]

Valentin's day 1987 I met the lover of my life, in a piano bar, in Aix en Provence, i was the only girl spoken english of group of friends, we fall in love at the first sight, and he an American pianist of jazz I helped him settle in France for a while, i hepled him working in piano bars and restaurants on the Côte d'Azur, as translator. I guess we are always in love because i live in free, to around the world for his work, and we meet in differents countries, never curious, or jalous, I'm indépendant, the freedon is the best ! Also i know my level in english and french accent are an obvious advantage...now we have 60 and 70 for him, still attract by each other, enjoying life and travel together, and not the two of them together I understood that freedom for him was the priority as I love him madly I accepted.today's communication technology helps us a lot we write to each other every day we started with faxes today it's WhatsApp

[@emilietije4836]

I assume this only applies in a relationship not when he is still dating you

[@Mat_Shaffer]

@@emilietije4836 the video? It applies at every stage! :)

[@emilietije4836]

@@Mat_Shaffer so he will not take you from granted if you start doing this at the beginning? A guy once told me that I was too nice

[@lovelaughrelationship2079]

Hi @Mat_Shaffer, I am an avid listener of your channel and you helped me a lot when it comes to knowing my worth and how to deal with a man. I've finally found a man of whom I am going to spend my life with. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and personal experiences on your videos. ❤ More power to you and Callie. ❤❤❤ God bless 🙏

[@somav8]

1. Appreciation (Reinforce good behavior) 2. Unconditional Support (Have his back when not successful) 3. Dance of Independence Give him space (To hang out with his friends) 4. Be his emotional sanctuary 5. The Spark of physical touch (in and out of bed) 6. Authentic Intellectual Ability 7. Loving Interruption to the routine (take them out on an adventure) 8. The language of little things (show him that you are listening) 9. The Harmony of Humor 10. Unapologetic Openness

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks for sharing!

[@tinyelephant77]

Thank you

[@alaalfa8839]

Some couples understand each other without talking. Silence and silent gestures are speaking from the heart. :) Good couples bring the best out of each other with their individual hobbies, ideas.

[@alaalfa8839]

It probably works only if he can feel worthy to receive it. receive money, receive success, receive love, empathy etc.

[@nn7397]

I did all of that. He still rejected me😢

[@geeem7889]

I love the example when you said how you did the dishes and let her sleep. Thats sweet. But i feel like house chores should be something that both ppl do as needed, something shared, not something that she only takes care of. And you know, everyone has a different set up at home which works for them. But I just don't like it when dudes expect praise for doing stuff that they should be doing anyway as a grown up adult. I know this was just an example and im not in any way attacking you. I love your content and have been listening for years!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Love this share and insight!! Yes Callie and I absolutely share house work duties, she usually handles the laundry and I am normally on dish duty unless I am very busy with work :) This was a situation where I am in a busy part of my work season but I took the time to support her so she wasn't left doing everything for me!

[@beatricebliss9379]

I support the 'polarized' kind of chores. Women are the habitual type of chores, that creates estrogen. Men are the punctual/ emergency type, that creates testosterone. Of course he does the dishes if I am sick. I don't have to ask him. But that is an emergency type right then. He does so much for me, that I actually like doing dishes, laundry, cleaning etc. At the same time, he treats me wonderfully: brings me flowers all the time, takes me to restaurants, pays me compliments, behaves like we were in the first months of our relationship. Rare find, I'd say. Also, appreciating what he does does not cost you anything, but your ego. And he will be more caring, more attentive and loving to you.

[@geeem7889]

@beatricebliss9379 cool, whatever works for you! The key thing is to feel happy and fulfilled in the relationship. I personally want both of us to do whatever is needed because we both work outside the home. If I was a stay at home wife that would be different. I don't want to be doing everything around the house myself when I'm also just as tired and busy as him. Plus I don't want to feel like I'm his mom. That's not attractive to me. That's not to say I won't take care of him as much as possible to the best of my abilities. It's a give and take, and it's all fluid..not set in stone. And I like it that way. There's women out there that do it all, working outside the home, taking care of the kids and doing all the house work. I think that's extremely unbalanced and of course they're burnt out. I'm not signing up for that life, as I think there needs to be some sort of balance to be happy. Otherwise you end up bitter and resentful, complaining about how your partner doesn't support you. It's not like it used to be back in the day when ladies used to be stay at home wifes. Majority of ppl don't have that option, and some don't want that even if they could. Which is also fair. Everyone's situation, circumstances as well as personalities are different which will impact the choices they make. Many still want the traditional roles which is cool but the reality is we don't really live like that anymore. Women have to work too. Cost of living is nuts.

[@me-meluv6921]

Big facts 💯

[@jennyhansen9963]

Yeah… the “doing the dishes ‘for her’” was cringy.

[@ellenlartz2499]

Matt: I have known my man since I was 7 years old . We were best friends by the time I was 17. We have been together since 2005. We give each other space and we try to keep each other in mind at all times. I wouldn't be me without him and I am the most grateful woman because he belongs to me.1

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks for sharing!

[@nn7397]

So lucky. I am 50 havent found him yet.

[@arnelevans4803]

​@@nn7397I'm 41, I still haven't found mine

[@angelm6497]

I thought I found him, but I married an illusion.

[@susanwalker3454]

These are so true matt, I am a therapist myself. showing my love that I appreciate him even for small things that get overlooked so often. He does the same for me. Appreciating someone makes them want to do more for you too. Unconditional support like Unconditional love is so important. If you really love someone you should shows these without expecting back. Needless to say a lot of time it does because they feel loved and appreciated. A healthy relationship includes having your own interests and life separately. It also gives you stuff to talk about! Before me my partner was married for 23 years, but it became so toxic he didn't want to live then he managed to leave. I met him later but have and still am showing him I'm there for him to be vulnerable with me, he's safe with me. It takes time but you can rebuild. We are very connected in energy, we cuddle all the time and just love having physical contact. He always says that he loves I'm intelligent and the way I think. We have both had lives that have been challenging but we have accomplished a lot. You should always keep life interesting nothing worse than mundane day after day. It is so important to do fun things together.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Love this share thank you! So glad you do these in your relationship 🙌🙌

[@deec411]

It might be old fashioned but making his favorite foods or sentimental foods. My husband talked about a shadow cake that his grandmother would bring to Sunday dinners. So I made one from his description and he loved it 🥲

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I’m so happy for you my dear!

[@KimLACHMAN-t8u]

You are such a Gem! Not many men are as open minded in variety in fun activities. You and your girl are blessed. Keep things fresh.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Aw thanks you’re making me blush;)

[@loriengoedhart3898]

Great video Matt ❤ I find humour is one of the easiest ways to connect with a guy, so I just love being a goof ball, having fun and not taking things too seriously all the time. Plus they just love confidence. When I am most confident in myself and living as my best self, then I find a man will respond in his best way.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

YES thats so sexy! so glad that you're aware of that :)

[@loriengoedhart3898]

@@Mat_Shaffer thanks! I think confidence in a man is sexy too. I love your confidence. It comes through in droves. And the little laugh you do, that's very cute! 😘

[@daisysig]

I have found your point about honest, genuine, heartfelt appreciation for his actions to be so very powerful! Especially for a man who comes from a very male-centric family background but feels inadequate many times. He is very service oriented because it's the "right thing to do" but isn't sure how to take my compliments...but I'm determined to help him understand his individual, unique worth and show him my love through appreciation!!! And I've seen the smile bubble up in his eyes when I do!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks for sharing!!

[@mariarossi6719]

Lovely to see you again, Mat. You along with Stephan Speaks have taught me a whole heck of a lot about men and relationships. Thank you.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I appreciate that! happy to be back! :)

[@dawnstonerock4253]

Agree!

[@lindadeise4575]

I'm so glad that you are making these videos again. Thanks Mat!!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Amazing! love hearing that!

[@krissekivisto4805]

Women need exactly the same things... But you are a wonderful Man 💋❤💋💋 helping women like this.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Wow, thank you

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Hi there, If you're wondering whether you're ready to dive back into the dating scene, check out our new quiz: 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' It might provide some helpful insights! 💖 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/

[@WildCarrie]

I’m talking to a guy currently and I decided to watch this video and let me just say we do all of these things already and consistently every time we see each other. It’s crazy how spit on this video is to it ❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Amazing so happy to hear that! ❤️❤️

[@Laycismom]

Laughter is so important in my relationship with my boyfriend. We talk on the phone for hours every night. One night we had a serious conversation and no laughing. The next day I just felt so hollow inside…and I remembered that we didn’t laugh…and he sensed that things were a little “off”.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks for sharing!

[@monicad.williams5057]

I am so glad that I have you as my life coach! You give such amazing insight into topics that sometimes you maybe not to well informed on. I really learned a lot with your videos!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I'm so glad!!!

[@quicknotesmedia9540]

Welcome back! So happy. I watch a lot of relationship videos and I’m an educator (I actually own a private school) and I have to say…you have the perfect combination of clear communication and effective delivery of your teachings and knowledge. Your content is valuable and your passion is clear. I feel it through the phone. I love the presentation and summary too. Btw, you’re very accurate about relationships. My boyfriend and I are in a committed, loving, and happy relationship for 2 years. I can validate this video. A+++ 😁Thank you ❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you! 😊 I’m so grateful for your kind words, especially from someone in education! I’m happy to hear the content resonates and that you’re enjoying a wonderful relationship. If you’d like to dive even deeper, I’m hosting a FREE live coaching course on love next month - it’s the perfect time to join our beta launch! Sign up here: masteryofconnection.com/ ✨💖

[@kimberlyp_shiprocker]

I love that you share gratitude with each other. I write gratitude every night, but never thought about sharing it with my guy. I love giving him space, because I understand the need for it. I hope I'm on the right track, as everything here sounds like our life (for the most part).

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Love that. Thanks for sharing!

[@kimberlyp_shiprocker]

@Mat_Shaffer Thank you! Much of this is what I've learned and practice because of sobriety.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

You're very welcome.

[@AnnAlasnanam]

You are very appreciative of her that's the difference between you and other man. My ex doesn't recognized that I've been doing this so I ended it up. Bless your relationship even more.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

thanks love! Yes I am :)

[@tangnfi]

Fears Desires and Agreements game… so brilliant ❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Happy to hear you enjoyed the game! ❤ It’s such a great tool for creating honest and open communication. By the way, if you’re looking for more, I’m running a FREE live coaching course on relationships next month - it’s a beta launch, and I think you’d love it! You can learn more and sign up here: masteryofconnection.com/ 😊

[@anneliesewright662]

That was very thoughtful & considerate of you to do all the dishes. When men do thoughtful & considerate things, it warms our heart. The thing that hurt the most about my ex was that he wasn't very thoughtful or considerate. He seemed to be full of himself and it felt like my feelings didn't matter very much. That broke my heart.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you for sharing that. It’s so important to feel valued and cared for in a relationship. Thoughtfulness can really make a difference, and I'm sorry to hear that your ex didn’t show that. You deserve someone who appreciates your feelings! By the way, if you're interested, I’ll be part of a FREE live coaching love + relationship course starting next month. It’s a great opportunity to join the beta launch! You can learn more and sign up here: masteryofconnection.com/

[@margo3367]

Treat him as you would want to be treated. Sometimes we can get too caught up in what we’re feeling and not take into consideration that he’s a human too and he has feelings that are just as valid as yours. ❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Exactly! 😊 It’s so important to remember that men have emotions too-treating him with kindness and empathy makes all the difference. 💖 It’s those small, thoughtful gestures that truly melt the heart. ❤

[@Angela-bo8qm]

It's really nice to have you back Mat 🥰

[@Mat_Shaffer]

So happy to BE back! 🤗🤗

[@Angela-bo8qm]

@@Mat_Shaffer I'm glad you are 🤗🤗

[@SharleyCampbell]

Yes. I get them as young as 22. Would rather attract 65 crowd but I think age is a problem to many of them. Thanks for listening and responding.

[@SharleyCampbell]

I think I’ve listened to all your recordings on utube. Look out Callie, I love your man. 😂

[@Mat_Shaffer]

so welcome! keep shining your light my dear you are a rockstar! :)

[@Primavera1111]

Do she also received a hug for every time she cooks and do the dishes?

[@phoenixfire4640]

this is exactly what I was thinking. Why does the man get an overreaction about the woman probably does the chores majority of the time and never gets that same appreciation

[@legaleagle4947]

Thanks Mat! What a wonderful come back 🙌🏻💝

[@Mat_Shaffer]

BOOM thanks my dear so glad you enjoyed it!:)

[@cutechiangels]

Mat, thx for the vid. The more I watch your vids the more it reminds me how I wasn't treated well, during my relationships.😥 Well, there's also the cultural differences you never talk about... And, that point is so important, especially nowadays. Even between Westerners, so many differences. But, when I think back, according to Western or Oriental standards, I was the perfect woman!! It's not to flatter myself but to state that eventhough I did everything you say, and more, the man was lazier, bullying, unkind, and even very disrespectful. I always made them feel comfortable, safe, way too safe... They thought it a play ground for nasty behavior and mannerisms. Yes, too safe, or too confortable, is no good for a man. He'll lack the boundaries needed. I supported them a million, was it when they were workless long years, or ill, (which is so bad for a man to stay at home..). And I even went through long periods not having intimate times, because Mr. ... Btw, why do you oh so often point out that one must make a man feel safe?? Isn't it meant to be the man who should make a woman feel safe?? As she's more vulnerable than a man, in many situations. What it is with men nowadays, to be such sissy boys, in general? Did you mean confortable, more than safe? As a kind, loving and beautiful woman, I wish to have a protecting husband at my side. He should make me feel safe in every way. Then, I'll make him feel confortable and strong! I was too often the only breadwinner, gave them free time, etc.. I did all the house chores and cooking, (rows if I asked help, which sucked big time), and even shop the groceries, only very few times together!! Let alone doing the DIY in the house, it was me!! I loath the way he was to me, and the lack of gratitude given. So, in my case I would consider less is more. I'm working on that, and wish to be with my best life partner ever, now! In the meamtime, I've had to deal with life and big health issues all alone, for years... And, that has made me go cold on close relationships. So many 'friends' in good times, but hardly anyone in bad times...Always been there for others. But, few are like me. Few are givers. That's life. I do still hope to have better people around me soon, with respect, kindness and Love! 🙏🌟

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Your comment is really insightful! If you're wondering about your readiness to start dating again, check out our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz. It could be very revealing! 🌟 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/

[@corinaluanavlad2417]

Congrats for this video! I'm so happy to see you again! It is a real pleasure to listen to your advices! I'm done with dating confused men! I love myself enough not to accept their inconsistent behaviour! I deserve to be happy with myself.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

YES happiness is an inside job! and the right guy wont be confused, he will be certain :)

[@corinaluanavlad2417]

@@Mat_Shaffer thank you! I do agree with you.

[@rose7777]

I second your comment sister

[@corinaluanavlad2417]

@@rose7777 thank you sis. 😉❤

[@rose7777]

@@corinaluanavlad2417 u said the truth 🥰🥰😘😘

[@rebeccahenson6989]

My nearly 5 yrs of a sweet long distance friendship has amazingly blossomed into an extraordinary love relationship like no other. My love of my life is a respected UN Surgeon currently contracted in Syria for our injured soldiers. I am so happy you are back so I have something to focus on as we talk almost daily, until my loving man returns stateside by Summer. When I have my unfortunate moments of impatience as I await his return at times, I must put his life in God's hands. You being back helps me to stay focused on our love relationship, until he sends me his passionate messages of love again. You helped me work through a tough ending to a Narcissistic marriage of 38 yrs, so thank you for keeping things fresh and encouraging for the past 5 yrs. I am so happy for yours and Callie's 2 yrs of love. Isn't it amazing to be living happy with your forever love? Happy Valentines Day 🌹to you both. Love & Light

[@Mat_Shaffer]

beautiful share my dear! happy valentines day to you too!

[@audreybiloon]

Be careful that your LDR with a “surgeon for the UN” (typical scammer profile, that involves asking for money which a “surgeon” doesn’t need) doesn’t ask you for money…if so it’s not a LDR but a LDS [Scammer] R.

[@francesmurray4991]

I enjoy your videos. What you say feels like it is commonsense, but it's amazing the ordinary things that we should do just get overlooked in our busy lives. Thanks for your suggestions

[@Mat_Shaffer]

thanks for the feedback frances I appreciate you! :)

[@angelm6497]

1. Absolutely agree 2. Have his back all the time, not just when he's unsuccessful. Nothing wrong with an insurance policy. Sometimes when someone feels safe, they can't see the potential of risk involved when people turn and their back is against the wall. 3. Independence is non negotiable, but I value the safe and intimate space. 4. To be his rock, absolutely and it should be reciprocal. 5. I do a killer Indian Head Massage. Come see me when your stressed and unable to sleep. I will accept the challenge. Rather ironic I have chronic insomnia! 6. I think you both need to intellectually challenge each other, otherwise, one gets lonely and the other becomes resentful because they can't meet your intellect. 7. You have to have spontaneous moments otherwise you drift apart in life's monotony. 8. The little things are the things that show you care. 9. If you can't laugh and have fun, what's the point?!!! 10. If you can't be authentic and yourself in any relationship, you're never going to feel safe.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Wow, love the way you expanded on each point! 😊 You’ve added so much depth, especially about having each other’s back and keeping things spontaneous. It’s all about balancing independence with intimacy and keeping things real-such powerful insights. ❤✨

[@angelm6497]

@@Mat_Shaffer Thanks. Glad you appreciated it.

[@angelm6497]

@Mat_Shaffer Yeah, that point about having his back when he fails bugged me a bit. You need to have each others back all the time. Sometimes we can see a potential risk they don't because they feel safe, but in my experience that's generally a mistake at times. It really depends on the level of risk, sometimes you need someone to say this is what I think, here is the risk, I will have your back either way or or if you choose that option, consider this. Then don't say I told you so.

[@lilibethnieto55]

Thank you Matt…love your authenticity and very spot on advices. Amazing message ❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

You are SO welcome! glad you enjoyed it :)

[@blueskysea450]

For me, one of the things that works is showing trust and treating my man like an adult, responsible guy who can do anything he sets his mind to. I let him feel it. I'm very careful not to pretend to be a mother and treat him as incapable or not very intelligent. I know he's an adult, he already has a mommy, he's smart, he's intelligent, he's clever and he can actually work towards a goal. So I just don't act like it's any different. And it is extremely easy to make such a mistake. Additional tip: Don't act like a teacher checking a homework assignment. Even with everything I wrote earlier - it could be a mistake that will sneak by unnoticed into your behavior.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Interesting perspective, thanks so much!

[@AngelinaRomero]

yeah I did all of this and found ou tthat he wasn't ready to be in a relationship. Took me 1.5 years to get over him. But I will move on and take this advise with my next man.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Your feelings are important. Thank you for trusting us with your story. We’re here for you. 🤗

[@SharleyCampbell]

I’m a 50 ish vibrant lady with a strong libido trapped in the body of a 75 year old. Finding love might be easier if I looked and felt my age. I think I understand what it feels like to be trans but mine is an age trans. Should be a term for that.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Age trans thats brilliant! also very common, so many of my students and clients are in the same boat, and a lot of times that means you will end up dating younger men... nothing wrong with that ;)

[@preppysquirrel9712]

The term is cougar, 😂. Just kidding, hopefully you will find an energetic man your age.

[@teresagaler6750]

Listening to this I seem to be doing most of these things without thinking. We are not in a relationship yet …but I see signs it is heading to something.better. I complimented on getting me chocolate for after dinner. I complimented him on setting the table where we would eat instead of at the lr table. I casually touch him like shoulder. We have not done much touching yet…we are a way older im 65 and 74. So life is different. This man has done more nice things for me then I have had ever had. Melting…we do stimulate each other intellectually. lol. Ty for this list it helps. He opened up to me right away as he told me I listen and he trusts me. One thing do not blab to theirs when he opens up. I have not even told me best friend what he told me. I tell her everything but i figured this was sacred ground and I do not want to lose his trust. Anyways thanks for the video.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I’m glad you found the video helpful! If you're thinking about dating again, our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz can help you determine if you're ready. Give it a try! 😊 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/

[@lovinglife58]

I just LOVED this!! So many great ideas. They all make so much sense!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Glad it was helpful!

[@juliaweinberg7336]

Matt, you are amazing! Loved everything that you said with such authenticity and Thoughtfulness! Keep teaching us all! Wishing you continued loving in your relationship and life.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you for your kind words, they truly touch my heart!

[@BledaRassmar]

I feel like I do these things…do you have a sibling like yourself, but who is single? Asking for a friend… It’s me, I’m the friend.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Haha, you’re cracking me up! 😄 I’m afraid I don’t have a single sibling to set you up with, but I do have something just as exciting - a FREE live coaching course on love and relationships coming up next month. It’s a beta launch, and you’re invited! Check it out here: masteryofconnection.com/ 😉❤

[@kevabela6307]

Thank you🎉 Wonderful. I appreciate a conscious, caring and articulate man's ability to communicate these very important needs and wants that even the most loving woman may overlook or never have considered ❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

You are so welcome

[@SewDiva5691]

Good to see you, Mat! Welcome back! A woman just being her authentic self and caring for others by volunteering. That’s just me. Lol! Btw, Callie is beautiful inside and out. I’m happy for you both.👍👍🫶💞

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Your kind words touch my heart

[@TheNewEarthCollective1]

Dude, the dishes are both of yours, not just hers! You did it for her too, but they were also your dishes and you should also be doing them!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I appreciate your opinion on this!

[@miakara4378]

😅 I love the "dude" bit that you started with 😂.

[@lex28lush10]

So genuine, love that you share your experience. Thank you, Matt ✨ Don't feel so paralysis in connection with men as much. .. Still takes lots of practice

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I’m so glad this helped you!

[@dianac9042]

do you thank her when she does the dishes?

[@Mat_Shaffer]

We thank each other often! Gratitude is so important ❤️❤️

[@JNyceWitSpice]

Many men have an avoidant style of coping. So, any avoidant no matter gender, has difficulty expressing emotion. They will show you gratitude with action. For example, when I do something my avoidant really appreciates, like a good home cooked meal he'll wash the dishes. I know that's his way of saying thank you besides saying, "That was delicious!" So, I say thank you to him for washing dishes/appreciating me. You shouldn't expect the same exact in return. Just the same effort.

[@PamelaLDeVrou]

Not about the fishes…it’s about the appreciation. In anything that’s done

[@debbiet.808]

Another really helpful set of ideas to show up for someone you really like. Thanku!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

So glad you found it helpful! 😊 Showing up for someone is such a beautiful way to strengthen a connection. Keep spreading those good vibes! ❤✨

[@rebekahrenee9093]

Love this ❤️ I already do these things but it helps to hear it from someone else and this is a fantastic channel! Thank you 😊

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I’m so glad this helped you!

[@georgiezocean]

I am a woman and ALL, yes ALL of these things are things I'd love a man to do for me!! All of these things would hit the spot to make me feel super loved, appreciated, valued. Never had any boyfriend or partner come close to doing virtually any of these things for me though. But here's hoping in future some man can live up to these things for me... things I naturally give.... as seriously, WOMEN WANT & LOVE all these things... Women LIGHT UP AT ALL THESE THINGS too!!!! BIG TIME!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks for sharing!!

[@if7363]

Glad you're back 😊

[@Mat_Shaffer]

yesss me TOO!

[@stephanienewton6618]

Very eye opening, and confirms what I’ve been doing to reel in my current man and he seems to be appreciating all that you’re mentioning here!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

You’re fabulous! Thanks for sharing your thoughts and spreading the love. 💖

[@sofiahubbard4570]

Hello Mr. Mat Shaffer. Thank you for sharing with all of us about your experiences and sugestions. With SAME respect I would like to share with you two things. 1-Your ideas, sugestions and ALL are great-believe me. 2-I will just add this to IT: Would you like to mentioned something like '1- Simple Ways to MELT a Women's Heart' perhopes? Reason is, that we women do a lot for men already. However, you are here sugesting us a few more ways-wich I thank You. I do believe that it be NICE that men also go out of their ways to make US (Women) welcome, respected and love. Hope, pray and wish that you may agree about THIS concept as well Mr. Shaffer.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Great idea!! It's on my list!

[@stacymurray4724]

Yeh I can't say "letting her sleep in & did the dishes for her" was a great example. This is an example of men needing a fuss cos they did something we do every day.

[@Joycelyn-v1t]

I dont see you doing the dishes , is a faviour you do for her , knowing that you both are living togather

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I appreciate your opinion on this!

[@faith_stmarie]

I love the messages you are sharing and your energy exudes peace! I can tell we are kindred spirits. I'm drawn to this work too, but I'm more focused on helping women fall in love with themselves so they break the cycle of falling into narcissistic abuse with men who are not ready for any type of serious commitment. It's a generational wound for all the women in my family. Well, maybe not all but quite a few.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

"You’ve got such great insight! Thanks for sharing and making this community awesome. 😘"

[@GilliMarieMoody]

Wow. Thanks. This was so thorough and comprehensive. The only one I might be a bit nervous about, in the beginning of a relationship was/is suggesting dates. I like the idea of an occasional suggestion on my part to break the routine though🙂. Once, I told a guy I wanted a SURPRISE. I said I didn’t care if it cost money or not. Let’s just say the evening involved heated, lovely scented massage oil on my back😃. Let’s just say that. Otherwise, PLEASE take a break for some herbal tea + lemon🍋 and honey🐝. This must have made you so tired. Cheers.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you for your kind words, they truly touch my heart!

[@peshkaris1801]

I love this, thanks 😊❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

You're welcome 😊

[@makikif8856]

I have learnt a safe environment is key to a relationship. Wonderful tips.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Absolutely! 😊 A safe environment is the foundation for trust and connection in any relationship. When both people feel secure, love can really flourish. 💖✨

[@emilygomez4748]

Good to see you again. Well needed video. Thanks for educating us.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

My pleasure! ❤️

[@pricesunbury59]

My man is the sweetest. He is great.❤❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Happy to hear that!

[@skyplayz2365]

So great to see a new video from you, Mat! Thank you! 🙏❤️

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Your kind words touch my heart

[@sandramichaud8033]

The tease about something to look for at the end, is enough to make us curious!❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks for sharing!

[@tooblessedtobestressed1771]

You are back Yayyy Loved your past videos

[@Mat_Shaffer]

ohhh yeah Im back baby! :)

[@mrsfantastical2010]

Yayyyy! Ur back❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you so much, I really appreciate hearing that from you.

[@trineneverest2255]

ohmygoodness I was really worried you weren't coming back I really needed you to come back specifically my back

[@Mat_Shaffer]

😂😂😂

[@newearthgoddess]

Great video. Love when you share the stories men tend to have- it help get inside and understand better

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much for your feedback!

[@MaitshotloMotshabi]

I enjoy watching your videos I learn something new every day thank you so much 😊😊😊

[@Mat_Shaffer]

so glad you're learning! much more fun to come!

[@bindicat9070]

Sorry to hes you had an injury! Glad to hear you are back! So right it’s harder to love when things are difficult!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much for your feedback!

[@nitagonzales1421]

Thanks, for your great advice Matt.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

My pleasure!

[@MariaPouli-lx5pe]

Unconditional love and acceptance

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Amazing! love hearing that!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Hi there, If you're contemplating getting back into the dating scene, our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz could offer some valuable insights. 🌸 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/

[@debrawhittle6812]

Allison Armstrong is a great resource for this too and puts in in a way females can understand it. Sadly though problems can arise though when a male isn’t in his masculine energy and has childhood trauma. It can make it impossible and turn things into walking on eggshells. I think a male who knows who he is already will respond great with all of this advice. 😊

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you for sharing!

[@kimngatran6271]

Thank you for your advice! I just subscribed to your channel!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I’m so glad this helped you!

[@anac2314]

So true Mat!!! Thank you. Glad you’re back. You’re the best here, seriously!!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

aww thanks hon! so appreciate that feedback

[@RegenaO]

Wow!!!! Fears - Desires - Agreements Game 🎉 brilliant! Thank you 😊 So powerful

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Yes! Thank you!

[@szilviaszabo2548]

Interesting video… first thing that made me think about which century we are at when you said “ I did it for HER” - when washing the dishes. So you think , it’s HER job , washing the dishes and she should be over the moon that you were willing todo this once in a full moon. I don’t think I want a man like this melting for me 😁 secondly, you said “these tips will help you get the man melting for your heart in whatever phase you are in the dating. “ well I don’t think so. These things come up when you already have been together for years , living together. It does not help to GET a man “melting” For you if you are at the beginning of the dating with 2-3 dates.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I appreciate your opinion on this!

[@mumac8865]

Thank goodness I am person who is naturally appreciative of a considerate person. A person who is aware that doing the dishes isnt necessarily the womans job in the first place. Be NATURAL BE HONEST BE KIND DO NOT BE A PEOPLE PLEASER GET TO KNOW YOURSELF first BE prayerful

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much for your feedback!

[@alexalmes]

On point! Thank you so much 🪷🙏🏽🪷

[@Mat_Shaffer]

You are so welcome 🙏

[@jazzqueen1]

Great video Matt

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much my dear!

[@annabellacrewe8858]

Thank you for your fresh and happy presentation ❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

you are so so welcome Annabella! :)

[@shaybee6893]

Very insightful advice. Thank you 🎉

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you for your kind words, they truly touch my heart!

[@joyuslife6126]

This was awesome and very helpful, thank you.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Your kind words touch my heart

[@devanshikar7705]

Hey Mat ! Welcome back. I thought of you so many times. Hope you have been well. Happy to see you 💐🙏

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you for your kind words, they truly touch my heart!

[@peacefulloveagain4124]

Thanks! But I wish men would show that exuberant appreciation!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks for sharing!

[@emonyt]

I want to see the internet overflowing with videos for men how to melt a woman's heart , because most men are completely oblivious on how to treat a woman. Nicely put.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I appreciate your opinion on this!

[@kathysalvatori5509]

I agree to show appreciation, support and be there during the bad times

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Interesting perspective, thanks so much!

[@cinduhughes3351]

Don't take each other for granted

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much for your feedback!

[@pamheisler4927]

Love your videos. I'd love to hear info on the 4 main attachment theories. You are easy to listen to. 😊

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Coming soon!

[@Ciaostella24]

Great video !

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Glad you enjoyed it 🙌🙌❤️❤️

[@dawnmarie8771]

Excellent content!! Thank you so much!!❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@zensvlognotapro]

Hi ! Mat nice come back ✋. Keep sharing your gift 🎁🙌. This is spot on 💖

[@Mat_Shaffer]

amazing glad you enjoyed it! more fun to come!

[@kevabela6307]

That's a great game: Fears, desires and agreements 🎉

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Fantastic! Thanks so much!

[@sharicoburn5475]

Beware of number two because being supportive of a man who's not currently being successful can be a huge mistake if they are super insecure about it then they will use you during that time and accept your money time and your help only to leave you as soon as things go better for them and I'm sorry but this happens so often that you really need a disclaimer about it

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Interesting perspective, thanks so much!

[@HapillyMe]

I'm a woman, l need space too! I need respect, appreciation, l need to be heard, l need support, l need physical touch, not just sexual. Why is it all about women doing things to get a man? Men need to do things as well to get us. It's a two way street..... reciprocation.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Interesting perspective, thanks so much!

[@abhishekgoyal9769]

Actually i used to all these with my ex but now at the end herat broken

[@celiarobin6128]

What about sharing my old and previously written poetry with him?? For an old love, but sharing with him all the passion that lies within me??

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much for your feedback!

[@lunewyorker]

Perfect Video!!! Thanks🎉

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thank you so much, I really appreciate hearing that from you.

[@marliaoikari2753]

Thanks for sharing all the amazing, honest wisdom Mat! This video was literally everything to me😘🥰 Will be often coming back to these truths you shared, in my mind, when I want to remember the things that are important to him❤ I've already seen so many of these work too, but didn't realize HOW powerful the thing I was doing actually was and what a positive impact it had on him! So thanks a ton again for sharing! 🫂🫂🥰

[@Mat_Shaffer]

You’re making my heart smile with your kind words! Keep being amazing. 💖

[@amyrossi7717]

I agree... Consistency is the biggest key

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much my dear!

[@faeriesart9647]

Hi ! New to your channel.. I am In a new relationship now about 4 months, he still gets personal friend invites I haven’t met yet, we do have mutual friends though, it helps to hear that I can support our freedoms.. it’s very vulnerable and deep when we are together🙏🙏

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I’m so glad this helped you!

[@margaritagonzalez5011]

I can’t finish listening to this…keep your Kelly, jezzz.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Thanks so much for your feedback!

[@user-jainupasana]

Amazing, awesome video❤

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Glad you liked it!!

[@heathersanchez3184]

My husband and I share the chores even though I'm home all day and he works outside the home and we appreciate each other for it!!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Your comment is pure gold! Thanks for making my day. 💛

[@carolinew9964]

So true about space Should be able to trust your man to hang out sometimes with their guy friends, and equally the women should hang out with their girlfriends.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Exactly! Trust and space are key for a healthy relationship. Everyone needs time with their friends! By the way, if you're interested, I’ll be part of a FREE live coaching love + relationship course starting next month. It’s a great opportunity to join the beta launch! You can learn more and sign up here: masteryofconnection.com/

[@TerriBennett-nf4vb]

thanks for the input I'm just a little scared . I lost my husband 8 years ago and haven't had a relationship since

[@Mat_Shaffer]

I understand. It's okay to feel scared. Take your time to heal. You deserve happiness when you're ready.