10 TEXTING NARCISSISTS RED FLAGS 🚩DON'T IGNORE THESE WARNING SIGNS/LISA ROMANO

[@trispr]

Everyone, these can be applied to friendships also. * don’t invest your time in someone who isn’t interested .*

[@trinap.8904]

My friend text me a picture of her on vacation. We are supposed to go on vacation but always future faking. Then I text stating very nice pics but when we we going on vacation? She ignored that part of the text.

[@jaimierose2985]

So true.

[@annamarie3288]

It can be applied to family too

[@kluv420]

Been there before

[@GdHr-oz5ph]

@@annamarie3288 Yes.

[@eyeoffthetiger2691]

“Once you feel avoided by someone, never disturb them again..

[@marjoriegarner5369]

brilliant wisdom.

[@catlady6938]

Well said

[@katarinatibai8396]

💯🎯😘

[@dlyteeats3868]

yup happened to me was texting talking and face timing and all the sudden i heard nothing from him i never responded or texted him to ask but then this morning got a text saying sorry that he's been busy thats why he hasn't called ect. i never responded back.... in my mind I'm like ok... whatever

[@catlady6938]

@@dlyteeats3868 I got a lot of excuses like that from my ex all lies of course, ignoring him from now on. don’t need that rubbish in my life.

[@NightOrchids]

Never cross an ocean for someone who wouldn't cross a pond for you..

[@tneville1962]

I did and fully regret it

[@tneville1962]

I did and fully regret it

[@tneville1962]

My mind is boggling endlessly....I wish I could redo history...I have big regrets with my ex narc. It changed my mind set forever.

[@tneville1962]

I like your analogies

[@NightOrchids]

@@tneville1962 yeah.. me too.. wasted 3 months of my life txting a woman who strung me along and had no intension of ever meeting me.. but we learn, we grow and move on.. come on you can do it ❤️

[@mandybon04]

"For someone that has never had a full meal, breadcrumbs look pretty good" That hit home

[@aro3500]

Thats me!!

[@theresefournier3269]

Yes. That's a FOR SURE!

[@chrisirsch1804]

That is amazing. Oh man does that hit

[@missmymumma3620]

Me 😒

[@theresefournier3269]

@@missmymumma3620 brace yourself. It's coming💙🎶🐦😇

[@robinalecia7554]

1. Chasing the thread. One way texting situation. 2.They never answer your text 3.never ask you questions abut you 4.Conversation is flat 5.They never answer a direct question 6. Person only calls when they need something 7.yes or no 8.intimate pics 9.Vulgar and rude 10. Something always happens before meet you

[@salliegallegos918]

Never answering a direct question is key. They ask you questions but dismiss yours by not answering. It’s their way of keeping the upper hand. I’m not talking about a romantic relationship, but relatives. Once they dismiss me, I never text back. I always hope it’s the last text, but eventually the BS returns . . . when then need something.

[@andreagomez3687]

❤️❤️❤️

[@sheliaquattlebaum997]

"Something Always happens before they meet you."... TRUE ..and so, they never do..after months if promising, planning..time and time again. Done**

[@cansee0]

No.5 🎯bingo

[@jhaw4274]

Why would she only send me nudes when she's gone in another state. I mean i have my opinion but facts are different. I wish i wasnt born special ed, why.

[@vonimas114]

Never let your loneliness to choose you a partner

[@jenniferbailey5914]

After listening to this I think I will just stay single. After being married/divorced twice to narcissists I feel I have a bullseye on my back. They cross my path every day and I literally get chills up my back when I’m near one. Don’t have anything left to give and I’m ok with that.

[@goodmorningsundaymorning4533]

Agree 💯

[@ShoutItFromTheHousetops]

Same here. I have way better things to do with my life.

[@junerichards9602]

Sounds just like my story. It's like I attract them.

[@sunshinedayz2172]

I have always felt this after decades of serving the first one..

[@Rohityourface]

Self love is the best love

[@futureshocked]

"I can be miserable by myself" PREACH

[@lisaaromano1]

Amenn

[@lisaaromano1]

Amen

[@johnsmith-kt7ef]

or you can be happy by yourself, but this is definitely the first step to cutting away from Narcissists when you are a co dependent person.

[@iGottaJones]

@@johnsmith-kt7ef what do I do if I’m the narcissist? I think I’m the covert type

[@jodyyy8752]

@@iGottaJones hey check if you're bpd. Or also some of their traits do rub off on their victims

[@GypsyMaeRose]

I found even by text the narcissist was trying to move things too fast and push boundaries to see how far he could go. It felt uncomfortable. Always trust your gut!

[@BrendaBaBoom]

Major red flag 🚩 that a Narc is playing games.

[@lauratheexplorer6390]

It feels like they are constantly testing you & your comfort zone.

[@BrendaBaBoom]

@@lauratheexplorer6390 They want to weaponize* your comfort. Narcs enjoy playing mindless and mischievous mind games. They are a subspecies from only god knows where.

[@catlady6938]

My ex did this but I chose to ignore the red flags and my instinct, big lesson learned.

[@GypsyMaeRose]

@@catlady6938 Same! Never again...

[@blicket]

A friend of mine once told me: Never make a priority of someone who considers you merely an option. It took a long time, but I’m finally there. “Namaste & walk away” - YES!

[@vanessasouthern1792]

When you've never been fed love off a silver spoon.... you learn to lick it off knives.

[@aureolegrimard6212]

Whoa ... Kinda loving the imagery here. Shivers up the spine.

[@me2846]

@@aureolegrimard6212 its true!!!

[@amanitamuscaria7500]

and then you learn you don't need to lick any cutlery at all.

[@elov7485]

oh my gosh, this statement is so sad and real 😣

[@laurensalt9497]

Love the poetry💕 it is dark but just as reckless, dangerous+ unhealthy as an abusive relationship. 👏well said Vanessa Southern. ❤awareness+ She relates this to things everyone encounters(texting games and healthy communications)

[@lesleysmith8300]

If he wants to be with you, he'll let you know. So true.

[@muskokamike127]

it also applies to she.......

[@lesleysmith8300]

@@muskokamike127 l agree.

[@lesleysmith8300]

@Alfred Weber l would also let them know l wasn't to be with them if it was the right relationship.

[@katarinatibai8396]

Also a red flag when someone ask you too many and to personal questions early on and is not willing to tell you something personal abaut them self. It could be a psychopath. When it feels like a investigation - RUN !

[@margomazzeo1680]

And also..when you have to play detective on them..time to run too!

[@peterbalac1915]

Now girls this works both ways, I dated on the internet after splitting up with the mother of my two children after twenty years of being together. I was bombarded with messages from all sorts of women some still cohabiting with ther partners one even paid for a luxurious weekend away with solely one intention in mind. Photographs five years plus out of date , up to three stone heavier ect. I bought more dinners than Michael winner travelling thousands of miles I'm sure they thought I was stevie wonder and wouldn't notice these Indiscrepancys. Many highs far too many lows and then I met the one, how wrong could I have got it !! You live and learn, i love women like there company but I'm sticking to friendship only now, I'm done with renovating there houses fixing there cars ect.

[@JoyRise]

Yeah, a narcissist

[@peterbalac1915]

@@reachingcoldmountainbeforeyou 😂😂👏👏quality , a good strong independent woman ,,,,,, with a truck!!!!!! Thanks for sharing ❤🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

[@ramona4913]

I just feel like everyone is a narc these days. No one is interested in other people. Also, codependents have a tendency to rush into bed / relationships, which makes it harder to get out of a situation.

[@daisy7066]

I say wait a month as a rule before being intimate & tell them if you have to.

[@savannahsaenz6409]

That’s all they know 🤷‍♀️

[@golondriz3]

My ex gave me a sex ultimatum and I could not go there. Basically he gave me a day to meet him ay the hotel restaurant . I asked if we could just meet at a restaurant not in a hotel and meet as friends first then he stopped calling me. Discarded me.

[@evessawallace174]

Yeah, everyone is on Narcotics:). Everyone except 4 me.

[@evessawallace174]

@@golondriz3 They were probably just trying to give up a Venereal disease or worse. Thank ur lucky stars and keep it moving;).

[@Smudgemom2003]

I’m 61 yrs old. After culling my friend/love list, I literally only have 1 friend left. And…I’m kinda ok with that

[@ghlee2300]

Totally. I Prefer text only for things like “I’m gonna be late” and imparting of information, but if you have something you need to discuss, you pick up the GD phone!

[@peetsz3732]

Agree 100%.

[@blakesleyk.7166]

Guess I’m old school bc I have a low threshold for just spitballing into the wireless wind. I politely make it known that I won’t continue endless texts. Then, If my wishes aren’t respected, I’m out.

[@skyejacques]

💯 😊

[@muskokamike127]

My ex gf LIVED for texting...she'd have an hour long text conversation instead of a 5 minute phone call. She loved it because SHE could control how long it lasted and end it whenever SHE felt like it. Or not even answer. Me: what time's dinner? she: ach, do I have to tell him? I'm busy petting my cat..... it bit her in the ass though...."I never said ______" scroll back 2 pages......"you texted me you'd be here at 6" umm no I didn't, show me....."no it's fine"...NO SHOW ME ON YOUR PHONE WHERE I SAID I"D BE HERE AT 6"....as she turned off her phone and put it in a drawer knowing full well I never texted her any such thing. It was part of her narcissism to try and tear me down at every opportunity

[@aleks_with_k]

Omg….I have said that thousands of times! I agree with you 💯

[@Matilda-re1wm]

You’ve empowered me to leave behind and let go of a really one sided, unfulfilling relationship and helped me to realise I was being disrespected and used. Thank you so much.

[@gloriabooth3612]

Thank you now look you have inspired me because life does go on but wow investing too much time into any one is hard and believe it or not I do feel love from the one I must now woman up and leave. 💯

[@ladennayoung2939]

Seek a healthy and loving relationship with Christ and self. Seek healing. Refuse to settle, and possibly seek counseling to get an understanding why you would entertain that type of relationship to begin with. You will never choose a healthy romantic partner or relationship from a broken place.

[@SpiritualGoddess69]

@@ladennayoung2939 Amen 🙏

[@hoppincin]

I hope you are ok

[@skyejacques]

💖💖💖💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽🤗🤗🤗

[@cr4228]

No one should give any more than is received. Equal energy. Equal investment.

[@lindafogarty3924]

No relationship can be entirely equal, and that “equal” will be interpreted differently between friends. It should flow and it shouldn’t be hard. The purpose of giving is not to always get something back in return. I know it’s a fine line.

[@cr4228]

@@lindafogarty3924 giving without ever receiving back or receiving Breadcrumbs is not healthy.

[@cr4228]

@@lindafogarty3924 why? Who said? Everything should even out otherwise one, and, or both ultimately suffers the lack of gain. Too many people think about potential. Schlamential. See equality. Live equality or be shortchanged. PERIOD. Think it is cool to be in the red while your so called mate is taking or giving not equal to your efforts? Think again. Partners work together to make sure there is equality and a balance. Just sayin.

[@lindabermudez-hafer5440]

@@cr4228 I would add the word “HEALTHY” when you are discussing partners because far too often, in toxic relationships, the toxic partner does indeed expect their partner do the majority of the heavy lifting. Too many people believe in relationships where one partner does all the giving & the other partner does all the taking, while engaging in “future faking”promises of coming through, & NEVER DO!

[@cr4228]

@@lindabermudez-hafer5440 perfectly stated. Narcissistic partners get away with their dysfunction for many reasons. It can be intimidating for a partner to address dysfunction while perhaps CHOOSING to hope it will stop. It does not stop. It grows like cancer. Eradicating it requires knowledge, support and resolve.

[@Maria-st3oy]

Respect my time. Match my effort. Keep your word. Always be honest. Stay consistent.

[@hunbundoe7627]

Perfect. I'm done making excuses for others' behavior. If they want to be an asshole thats cool, seriously I will just move on. Surprisingly I have gotten really good at that. I find it leaves room for really awesome people, hobbies and just enjoying myself and my time.

[@tumbleina49]

Exactly this, but somehow seems too much to ask in today's world! It gets frustrating.

[@tumbleina49]

@@hunbundoe7627 100%

[@ChristianSoldier71]

IF YOU DIED TODAY, WHERE WOULD YOU GO, HEAVEN OR HELL? We can not hide our sins from God. Jesus loves you and He died for your sins. Repent and put your faith in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. Once you die, it will be too late to repent. Mark 1:15 For the Kingdom of God is at hand, repent and believe in the gospel..

[@tammyfitzgerald5336]

🎉🎉❤❤❤

[@nikoljacksonn7771]

Sometimes after listening to several of these in a rowI start to think EVERYONE IS A NARCISSIST?!

[@joankennes3230]

Everyone is: it is a necessary developmental phase in (small) children. You need healthy narcissism to have boundaries and enforce them, to stand up for your needs, to negotiate for a job, salary, house or whatever. A narcissist does not get past this attitude and ONLY thinks of number one, overtly or covertly. About 20% of people are like this, the others are more healthy than a codependent who ONLY thinks of the needs and wants of OTHERS.

[@joankennes3230]

@Meaning What it's on a spectrum. Which does not mean it can't be inappropriate, harmful or even totally toxic. Those psychologists have either never experienced NPD type people or are NPD themselves.

[@mysticalvibe4241]

Amen! Nicole

[@anrenes3459]

Yeah everyone is… but for some it affects relationships and their work and life. If friends always leave you … most people wonder what’s up…. Sadly this type of person that is extreme, they can’t figure out how to fix themselves or what is wrong. It’s a bummer. Most people are workable even if self centered.

[@LR-yu3mx]

I sadly seemed to start thinking there are many around!

[@Lorettaforbes1]

I have absolutely learned I require an emotional connection in order to enjoy a sexual relationship. It is non-negotiable and am easy way to filter out men

[@alba7165]

I think most of us women require this. It's natural.🙂

[@sabat8068]

Men are made differently though. They can eeeaaaassssily do it without emotional connection. We as women must understand this. They are NOT like us. It takes longer time for them to establish connection. How to know they finally have it? I don't know... :D but i wouldn't belive words though. Maybe Google what's the signs a man has emotional connection.. Maybe they share personal stuff? Maybe men reading this can share?

[@wildanimus2559]

@@sabat8068 Yeah, and it may be how they're biologically wired to function, but it's no excuse for behaving like dogs.

[@judecapone7651]

I too suffer from the same situation whereas I must have a emotional connection to have intimacy on certain levels with a female. That is called demi sexual. So the options of friends with benefits or one night or random partners or whatever you want to say it it's always been out the window for me it's never been something I could ever partake and be totally successful doing so or even feel good about it. So there are some men out there although I have never met another one deals with such some of us do have that situation which is kind of a good thing... The other problem to that is once we have these emotions of these feelings about this person letting them go is is very hard it's traumatizing it's emotionally paralyzing it's not something you can just flick a switch on and off move on to the next doesn't work like that at all.

[@TheGra325]

@@judecapone7651 I honestly feel exactly as you have written down so well, I tried the whole random hook up thing a couple of times as a youth but it’s just not an enjoyable experience for me.

[@garycordle5295]

It's better to be single and happy then to be with someone and be miserable 👍 up Lisa and survivors and thrivers 🙏

[@Juanita5359]

sometimes its better to be single and not necessarily happy at first but learn to be alone and be content first

[@jaynestewart5958]

💯

[@rg2027x]

single + with a nice *cat* :)

[@kmrood]

I knew the day that I married my husband too. It was the most humiliating day of my life. I had this feeling that I just wanted to hide. I just started opening up to my family about everything. I didn’t tell anyone and pretended that everything was great for such a long time because I was so embarrassed that I was in a relationship like this. I also feel my soul crying. There was every single red flag in the book, but to other people he was perfect. He has the most educated and successful people fooled. I was gaslighted and manipulated so much that I absolutely lost myself. I was so happy and confident and ready to live life to the fullest when I first met him. He totally broke me. I’m starting to come back. It will take time.

[@shannonfranks10]

Firstly, know that it can happen to anyone. Sadly, it’s pretty common. Take care of yourself. You didn’t do anything. So tell that shame to f*** off! Then you can truly find and LOVE yourself again. You deserve it!

[@johng.4959]

I understand. In a relationship now where I question myself over and over and over... It's a living hell to be in this and especially when NO ONE knows what you are experiencing! I hope you come back because you must recover your "self".!! Best wishes to you.

[@LadyRichie]

I am experiencing this

[@beencouraged4163]

It’s so crazy how when you are at a point in life of being so happy and full of life and then sometimes the devil sends these people into your life. You will be ok and come out of it better than before!

[@zzcoffie75]

Have been there too i divorced him and his double face .

[@Maria-st3oy]

Keep it simple.. -missing somebody - call -wanna meet up - invite -wanna be understood - explain -have questions - ask -don't like something - speak up -like something - share it -want something - ask for it -love someone - tell them

[@passerby6168]

love someone - show them (listen, consider and respect their feelings, be there when they need you, and don't be a fairweather friend/partner).

[@devintompkins9626]

Oh so... Be straightforward? Lmao I have yet to meet women who even can be straightforward

[@allenwolff5855]

So many of these were exactly how I rolled. He took most of this from me as an attack. Got mean. Got rude. Arguments galore.

[@RS54321]

@@devintompkins9626 Are you straightforward yourself? If you want it in your life, you need to give it as well.

[@cori1302]

This is great! I am going to do these, and share them. Fits my values and expectations for them. Need to find some people to interact with, this way.

[@andre1987eph]

#1: Don’t need a relationship. Assume you may be single the rest of your life.

[@LinYouToo]

Friends could be like this as well. I used to have a friend who would call me for an emotional booty call. I didn’t realize I was being used as an emotional container or emotional dumping ground. Boundaries are such a beautiful thing. No more dumping.

[@yushkh256]

LinYouToo, O yes, had a same one. She would never ever ask me how I was doing, would go straight to bad mouthing the hubby & now that I've cut her off suddenly the hubby is the Angel of her life in her fb page.

[@LinYouToo]

@@yushkh256 it’s really something how they act.

[@celestialmaat9462]

I had a friend like that. I had to let her go. She would absolutely only call me when she was having mental breakdowns and problems and then she would say wow I feel so much better now😳🙄…. I’m like I bet you do after you get finished dumping your emotional problems on me

[@LinYouToo]

@@celestialmaat9462 exactly!

[@LinYouToo]

@Hazel_Basil I hear ya.

[@HettiedeKorteDiplomaat]

Today I just dumped this guy. The first two months he was very interested. The last couple of weeks he wrote less and less. Never answered questions. So I wrote: ‘Sorry, those crumbs of love you throw at me once and awhile, are not enough.’ This guy assured me he loved me. It’s nerve wrecking and made me feel so miserable. So I cut him out of my life. In spite of that lonely, lonely feeling. I’d rather be alone..

[@BrendaBaBoom]

Everyday you’ll love yourself more and be thankful when you AVOID miserable people and situations. Honoring oneself and refusing crumbs* is a powerful gift to the soul.

[@HettiedeKorteDiplomaat]

@@BrendaBaBoom Thank you.

[@JohnSmith-lt3jl]

Well done you x

[@margomazzeo1680]

@@HettiedeKorteDiplomaat Good for you!!

[@margomazzeo1680]

@@HettiedeKorteDiplomaat I went through that great pain also..time heals all wounds..and time also wounds all "heels"..

[@sheilaisaacs981]

they will probably say something like "I don't ask you a bunch of questions" yeah because they aren't interested in your life

[@xen42]

I didn't ask questions because they were so busy. I felt it was rude when she had dozens of people asking of her help and time. And was waiting for when she had time to hang again.

[@ladybug947]

@@xen42 well your important too, if someone makes you feel like they’re too busy for you then find other people who value you bc you matter too

[@gabrielamartiniuc6322]

Someone can also be asking questions to try to manipulate you to think they’re interested in you, when in reality they’re interested in how to get you to snagged so they can gain from you.

[@toosexy7955]

@Sheily, Soo RIGHT...RIGHT ON SPOT!

[@toosexy7955]

Especially when they ask for MONEY, You are a mean woman if you don't send it..They get HOSTILE~

[@totallychillgirl8072]

Never be afraid to walk away. 💕

[@abinayavelu22]

I did... Before a month... I feel better' ..... Now one of the best decision I ever made ...

[@leslieinglis399]

If you have to ask for something more than once or twice…it was never meant to be. Move on. This applies to business as well

[@iamtheman7018]

Keep in mind before ever being upset by a text that you did or didn't get.Texting is a terrible way of communicating. If you miss one reply it can change the entire context of what has been said. The spell check and auto-correct can insert words that were never intended. The carrier can cause long delays in the delivery. And anyone can easily deny that they ever saw your text, or that the phone was off. Never make any serious decisions or plans based on simple text messages, especially in anger. Don't play on the phone. Only good for yes no lol call me.

[@lightspiritedlass]

Wise words of truth! Sadly, UNcommon sense these days....

[@katieratcliff6342]

You hit the nail on the head & ty never thought about what you just shared w/us😱

[@MKG312]

Yes, and tone is not always clear through text. Very irritating.

[@hoppincin]

So so true

[@hoppincin]

@@MKG312 so many things are taken the wrong way thru texting. It’s simply not worth it. The Narc gets upset if u don’t answer etc I’m like listen I don’t carry my phone on me 24/7 there will be times I’m really not available. He didn’t like that.

[@DontEncourageHim]

This goes for friendships, too Not just romantic relationships

[@AZDC99]

I had this friend all sudden afternoon 15 years they claimed that their phone was broken. Their narcissistic side came out about 3 years ago big time. they claimed their phone was broken yet had two phones plugged into the wall and claimed they didn't want to work it. Well a few days later I called maybe two or three times because a serious personal problem developed between me and my parents. This is always our confiding between each other topic. So I get to their place, they claimed at their phones been broken, I pulled my phone out and immediately dial it and hear it ring loudly in the room standing out the front door. I just smiled and said "have a nice life" and walked out

[@MEH157]

I am in the process of realizing my very good friend of over 25 years is a narcissist. I think back over the years and it all makes sense now. Wow!

[@oscarwilliamson6163]

M H,You don't need a narcissist in your life .....

[@shelley7209]

I’m in the same situation. We grew up I was 12 with her, had to walk away at 35.. I miss her everyday but I just couldn’t it was exhausting..

[@hannahl5663]

A big red flag with one of my narcs was that he often didn’t ask how I was when we talked. Most normal people will ask how you are almost every time they see/text/call you. If it’s all about them all the time, red flag. The final thing that proved to me this guy was a narcissist was when after we had stopped talking, he texts me on HIS birthday, hoping to get attention. This man never even knew my birthday or didn’t remember/acknowledged it.

[@ArWx]

wow

[@TheMar0115]

There was never any substance in our conversations - it was all surface. He never asked me about anything like growing up, my brothers, I don’t think he even knew we spent all our summers at the New Jersey shore growing up. Looking back I felt like it was dark. I never felt happy - addicted yes. But not happy. I lost my sense of humor. I started feeling sick all the time. It felt like we were playing house - it was not real.

[@rachelhenchley3209]

This has brought me to tears, I know I have been craving crumbs all my life, I am 51 and my narcissistic husband left me in September 2020, I am on the journey to recover, but fear I still have a long way to go, thank you Lisa for teaching me x

[@taylorpresley9887]

God bless you with love and peace.

[@dekas5357]

Hang in there. Stay single a long time. You’ll repeat the pattern otherwise.

[@sherijohnson6096]

I am two years away from my divorce from my extremely narcissistic husband and I feel for you! That was absolutely the hardest thing I’ve gone through - keep being strong and know you aren’t alone! Unfortunately there are a great many of us 😞 please know that when you look back each six months you will feel more peace, be stronger, and will have found more of your voice. Sending much love and support ❤️

[@jend2915]

Be patient as it will take time. It has taken me a decade to recover from the relationship I had with narcissistic ex husband. I am also 51. I enjoy being single now and I spend my time building my own life. It took lots of time, therapy, and support to process what happened and to move forward. Do not beat yourself up rather love yourself more than ever.

[@kimmonks116]

Jen..I am 50 and only out 2 and half yrs yet..after a 28 yrs malignant narcissist marriage...on very low contact..still very much at beginning of healing..a decade for yourself..thats how horrendous this is..😕I expect it to take a long time for myself yet..no getting away from the fact and the work I have to put in 🤨

[@mamab4720]

I remember a long time ago when I heard you talk about that narcissistic silence. They don't answer you back. They get to ignore you. They never open attachments or watch things you share with them.

[@BlackRosary81]

I think that’s so rude when people don’t even bother to open or watch the attachements you took time out to send.

[@Empriz7]

As a child who receives these types of messages from a narcissistic parent, may I suggest that’s simply not the way your kids relate to you OR the relationship is damaged so those things cannot replace actual meaningful conversation.

[@ysunsets]

Yes, perfectly said💥

[@tiarrasjourney1070]

@@Empriz7 agreed.

[@FleurRebelle]

@@BlackRosary81 I think its rude for you to expect someone to stop what they're doing and give attention to something u chose to send

[@valentinanocross8677]

You've summarized so well. Again and again. How to choose ourselves.

[@michellebennie5590]

Yes, choosing ourselves always. As we are so worthy of pure, true love. ❣xx

[@purelove8972]

That is so true about the fact that loving someone is not enough, they have to be open to receive your love. Thank you Lisa

[@NoMoreTears64]

This has got to be THE SINGLE best video on KZbin. Every point you made, I could relate to. I wish someone like you would have come along and spoke these truths into my life when I was younger, however even NOW I find myself accepting bread crumbs in a "friendship" rather than having the "meal".Thank you for sharing your experiences and insight!

[@Bea-wb9uk]

If the question is not answered, don't text back until they answer the specific question. I repeat the question and if they are unresponsive I mute them so they don't demand all my bandwidth usage while they toy around and they don't answer a question. It's okay to mute a person and do what you need to get done rather than letting them waste your time and attention. Taking your time in a relationship let's you know if the person is avoidant or just busy. Don't rush anything. If you get a pattern of patience and conscientiousness in return that's a good sign. Conscientiousness and self control are signs of a healthy person.

[@tabitaeguangs]

I hope you are all these things in this paragraph you have written .People like you always think you are better than others.

[@Bea-wb9uk]

@@tabitaeguangs I don't think that. I'm not perfect. No one is.

[@Bea-wb9uk]

And if you are at a job or need to take care of something you can't let yourself get overly distracted by text issues.

[@daas3715]

@@tabitaeguangs wow that sounds exactly like a narcs statement.. having no basis for such a comment nor any need to comment you make a broad generalized negative comment. Your comment says nothing about who its aimed at yet speaks volumes about you. Usually comments like these are about yourself, bc where else would they come from. Now that you've expressed what u find as a shortcoming in writing maybe it'll be easier to work on it. Or maybe you won't. Have a good day

[@tabitaeguangs]

@@daas3715 Just like your comment speaks volumes about you.

[@suecole5543]

So true . dont' settle for anyone just to have someone❤

[@anndillard8681]

Agree but when someone asks me too many questions - it's a red flag also...

[@westcoastvibes1193]

yeah. I dated someone who said he wanted to play 20 questions. no thanks. Glad he is gone. He creeped me out.

[@vitaminK1121]

"I'd rather be miserable and alone than miserable because someone's making me miserable." [Leo DiCaprio enthusiastically pointing meme] SAY THAT!

[@StPatrickApollos]

I LOVE HOW YOU SPEAK FROM A GENUINE PLACE TO HELP AND INFORM. I get so frustrated on KZbin lately with all of the commercial-like tone speaking (by the way, when the heck did that come back in style), and the gimmicks, and the by-popular-demand requests that are filmed half-heartedly. I was just about to give up when I came across your channel. The way you talk and actually explain things, I can tell that you intend for every single word to hit your audience, no matter who or how old they are, and that you want them to understand the subject at hand, and NOT just click click subscribe subscribe. Please keep this energy and do not let the internet or the pressure of social media change how you do things!

[@alisonvanbockel8146]

That little "ding" has gone beyond being exciting and addictive and is now annoying and intrusive.. what annoys me is that person on the other side of the "ding", who gets annoyed with u if you don't respond right away they don't think that you might have the life and be busy doing your OWN thing.. or be at work, shower, sleep, have visitors etc, and they start getting upset and paranoid as to why you're not answering immediately.. getting really sick of social media

[@AimeeL73]

Narcissists will do that to try to give you the spins. To make you prove you’re not cheating, prove you love them by dropping what you’re doing or interrupt you doing self care. Don’t fall for it! 🤔

[@ladyd1614]

It’s Your Phone 📱.. you don’t have to answer it for no one !! Remember that !!

[@wildanimus2559]

I have a former friend who actually called the police to do a welfare check on me when I didn't answer her 10 pm phone call immediately, though she is well aware that I have complex PTSD and am terrified of police and definitely terrified of them showing up on my doorstep. I was actually asleep when they came knocking. My phone had been muted because of her habit of blowing up my phone at all hours of the day. This was her sick way of punishing me.

[@joso7251]

Exactly, you are no one’s slave to be on someone’s phone leash... I hate when some ppl act entitled to my time Like that

[@aintgotnoname6548]

@@wildanimus2559 Wow Omg!!! Great example! And some people do those sneaky "did it because i care" type of things with that plausible deniability. With narcs if it seems like it could be a punishment it probably is. This has seriously tainted my relations to others for years. I never trust that others' motives are good, I always think they are nasty and sneaky. Realizing now the enormity of that

[@ShoutItFromTheHousetops]

This strongly applies to a relationship I used to have with my younger sister who always texted me “from a distance.” We grew up not being allowed or encouraged by our mother to be close as sisters. But as adults I thought we could make up for all the lost years. I was wrong. I began to always feel like she just tolerated me. I was fully vested into this relationship but over time I could see through her texting that it was never reciprocated. It took the death of our mother and a cruel act of rejection for me to see how little she cared about me and how easily she dismissed me. We’ve not spoken or seen each other for 5 mos and the pressure and anxiety I had felt over this relationship is now gone. Peace has replaced all the negativity and constant need to question myself. I learned that she is an insecure person and that I had actually empowered her to have me chase her. I allowed her to take advantage of me and my desire to have a relationship with my only sister. I still love and forgive her but now it’s from a long safe distance.

[@BirchWitch]

I have the same thing happening with my only sibling, (younger brother) the relationship has gotten so bad that I have just cut him out. My poor dad is seeing first hand how terribly my brother treated my mom, & why I can’t have that in my life. I’m sorry that you’re going through this, it’s pretty painful. 😞

[@ShoutItFromTheHousetops]

@@BirchWitch Thank you for the understanding and I’m sorry for your loss as well. Here’s a saying that’s pretty accurate, “You can pick your friends, but you can’t your family.” I might also add, “...but, you can choose which family members you spend time with.”

[@daisy7066]

This happened to me too, have you asked her why she wants to continue relating in the way your mother wanted? It sounds like shes been brainwashed and/or has no self-awareness. My siblings were totally brainwashed etc.

[@picklep9812]

After my mom died my entire immediate family abandoned me. That was 8 years ago and today I can say that was the best thing they could ever do to me. It was brutal but it forced me into a deep dive. I’m a better person to myself for it.

[@liftheart84]

Wow! I just wanted to thank you for writing that. It is sad that this has happened to you. You sharing this is very helpful though because I know I have experienced these telltale signs and I don't want to face the truth. What I mean is the feeling of being tolerated and what you described. What I have done and I think that you did and a lot of people do is put such weight on the title, Sister. I am not sure why your mom or how your mom was able to keep you separated. I know you said something about not being encouraged and I wondered if there were tricks... like your mom telling you one thing and telling her one thing and making it where the two of you would be mad at each other but because of something your mom said... and not actually from having first-hand communication with each other....??? I wonder. But however it came about that you had a period of time that you were not close I wonder what the reason was that your mother wanted this. Also, I wonder if that period of time and whatever your mother caused your sister to think was the death of the relationship even before you started trying to get the relationship at a later date. I've experienced something like this like I said and I have heard about things like this but I guess I'm somewhat fearful of exposing all of my information at this point because I'm very confused. I'm just confused why your mother would want the two of you to not be close. And then after your mother was not able to keep you from reaching out and striving to have that relationship with your sister, I'm wondering why your sister did not reciprocate. Was it that she has a similar personality type to your mom? Or was it the lasting scars that your mom may have created and the misinformation about you that your sister may have believed and clung to for a lifetime? Anyways I really treasure that you took the time and did not mind being forth coming with your story. I'm sure many people appreciate it and I just wanted you to know how much I do. It is just a mystery to me.... mean people.

[@CFChristian]

Your family is fortunate and blessed enough, to have a parent who is ahead of the curve in these matters.

[@muskokamike127]

"Making you chase after them in text, they'll make you chase after them in love" I missed some major red flags with my last gf because early on, she came after me. I wasn't interested in meeting anyone at all. She would text, come into my shop, etc. Then at night, we'd get into long text conversations. One night she says "I'm going to make some tea" so I waited...and waited....and wait, what? how long does it take to make a cup of tea. Nothing for the rest of the night. I thought it was extremely rude and ignorant and told her so. Her answer? "why do I need to tell you I'm off for the night? I decided to go watch a movie...it's just texting" No, social norms apply whether you are talking on the phone, in person, via text or via carrier pigeon. You don't just STOP communicating whenever you feel like it. After our relationship started to get more serious, this thought of entitlement got worse and worse. I didn't know anything about narcissism then but I was confused.

[@codebluthree]

My goodness, I just ditched someone that did this days ago

[@muskokamike127]

@@codebluthree good on you, it's all about respect.....

[@Nourabad]

My ex gf was on holiday, she called me telling she was walking home, saying it was dark and she was afraid, so we called, then she came home and said wait I need to go to the toilet, she hung up, and I called her back but no reply. Later that night I saw on snapchat she read my messages, next morning she said oh sorry, I didn't have internet connection!

[@muskokamike127]

@@Nourabad yeah, and did you believe her? NOPE...... Red flag when she doesn't respect you enough to simply say "ttfn" or something. It's only common courtesy.

[@Nourabad]

@@muskokamike127 Yeah they are twisted in the head. You were just good for that 'moment' You must see it like a child who is playing with toys, they add no emotional value to it, when they are bored they throw you in the corner and will look for another toy in the room.

[@michaelcook3168]

When someone wants to know all about you but doesn't say much about themselves is another red flag one should look out for.

[@girlsixdiva]

Common sense stuff that many of us know but need to hear out loud. A lot of therapists claim to know codependency and narcissism, but they really don't. Ms. Romano is hitting all the points which too many therapists are missing.

[@davehuntley3511]

I had a fair amount of counseling over the years,never heard anything like this, wondering why! Pray over you and you write the Check. We'll my education continues 😂 Getting better all the time 😀

[@resilient8788]

Excellent video! Especially the last 10 minutes. I went several years being by myself after I got divorced. One day I woke up and I was just like I want somebody in my life. I let go of all the past hurting from the divorce and decided I was tired of being alone. That is when I chased after a highly covert narcissist man. I ignored countless red flags. I've learned a lot from that sad/horrible life lesson. I will listen to this video again and again if need be. Thank you!

[@mariannemcguff1296]

“Have faith in something unseen”Wonderful comment!!!

[@golondriz3]

Believe you deserve it all! I believe in miracles.

[@zenawarrior7442]

Thank you for these. Biggest red flag, even with a friend, is when someone doesn't respond. I never invest in that person anymore. Done. 😊👋💕

[@rg2027x]

Or they "respond" just to say they're 'busy' and "will get back to you later" [yet never do] 🙄🖕🏾

[@zenawarrior7442]

@@rg2027x Yes that's one game for sure...busy is bs.😑 Just a great excuse to do something besides talk to us. Totally agree w your finger lol😊🖕🖕👍👍

[@rg2027x]

@@zenawarrior7442 thanks 😀 that finger sure gets a lot of repeated use! No one is too busy to tell you how busy they are 😂 Someone being "too busy" is a myth. People make time for the things that are really important to them!

[@zenawarrior7442]

@@rg2027x Exactly when something is important people make time. Period.

[@rg2027x]

@@zenawarrior7442 Indeed 👍 Busy can sometimes be for real. Like working a job or even taking your cat to the vet. But most times busy = BS 💩

[@staciehulm4595]

Narcs will love bomb through texting by sending emotive songs with manipulative lyrics. They let the music say what they don’t want to waste their time saying because they don’t really mean anything; they just want you to think they do.

[@laurelledubois]

Finding a good man in all this dating scene - is literally finding a needle in the haystack. So many men let themselves being chased today and make no effort at all - always thinking the Victoria's Secret bombshell is just around the corner waiting for them..

[@judecapone7651]

Not this guy! I truly despise being lumped in with the soulless male species! I just don't have the energy anymore to jump through hoops that we're never mind to begin with.

[@aintgotnoname6548]

I guess as long as they have porn they dont want to put in effort. Or some of these men are looking for "emotional tampax" too

[@EagleZtoTheGrave]

The modern culture isnt optimized for the ideal relationships, men & women of this era tend not to be worth the effort. We should build friendships first, be more pragmatic & not let "feel good" lead the way.

[@user-lh5li8ll7i]

They dont make an effort and let the girl do the chasing cause its the only way that works. A man should never chase a modern woman, not worth it at all. They all think they are entitled the best of everything cause the culture has brainwashed them to believe that, so they reject decent men with good hearts, which are the majority. If a man is doing his best, keeping a good heart, taking care of himself and working honeslty,( irregardless of weather hes making a lot of money) he should be proud of himself. Respect himself and not run after anyone. Let a woman who truely values him, prove it to him

[@margomazzeo1680]

@@user-lh5li8ll7i Not all modern women are entitled..ur meeting the wrong ones..

[@erismiracle9779]

That’s the reason why I am not a texter anymore. I would prefer to talk on the phone, voice note or meet up. It’s important to trust your gut instincts and to recognise red flags. Thank you for this video Lisa. I learnt alot! :)

[@artandculture5262]

This seems like a great idea. To stop texting and speak or not be in contact.

[@09Amaris]

So good and so accurate .a breadcrumb looks good to a starving person.

[@sammaustin813]

I've like being in a relationship. Our society still favors couples & families.

[@danielle_M.75]

I grew up starved for male attention. I'm pretty sure I've always had "daddy issues " as they say, as my dad abandoned me when I was 9. I've also always been a people pleaser, even before he left. I have let men use me in the past, just to have that affection and I thought they would love me. Crazy I know.

[@mimiharless7971]

It’s not crazy. It’s what happens when we don’t have the love of a father.

[@tional5266]

It so crazy I did the same for far too much of my life

[@tiyanawilliams5070]

Thank you for sharing your perspective and experience! It is nice to know that I am not alone of having daddy issues and being a people pleaser. To note: never thought that I was really alone in experiencing this but it is nice to see other women admitting how it affects them. Even though I discuss my concerns about my biological father to my mom and she has been honest in letting me know about him etc, the impact of him not being there still affects me even though it does so gradually. And there is really no love lost. Context: before I actually had gotten the chance to know a little more about my dad through conversations withmy mother, (when I was younger) I always used to wonder why I had a rebellious nature/behavior/approach towards men (the instant mistrust), and of putting up a wall. Now that I am 25, I still have trust issues but I do acknowledge that ALL men do not behave like my biological father nor are they womanizers or narcs. However, I have met older gentlemen (whether it was from college or an event etc) that probably have sense that about me (of having trust issues with men, daddy issues) and have unsuccessfully tried to groom me. I do not know how much this is true so I would hypothesize through the observation that older men and even younger ones (but mostly older men) sense that the girl or woman has daddy issues and use tactics in grooming her.They do so by acting as if they see the potential and strongness of these ladies when actuality they want to treat them like puppets overtime if the girl or woman gives them a chance to develop a "relationship". Well, I know for damn sure that I do not have the desire for oldermen because I just dont see myself with an older genetlemen. I would only want something that is platonic..... man (ageism lolol im sorry :( ) but thats just my choice along with my perference .In general It is sick that older men are out here acting this way and THEY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING. Idk, but I think I am onto something. So in a way, what you have written really resonates, and that is just one aspect I could give right now.

[@rangegirl2000]

They're not who THEY think they are!! So true!! "I don't have the time to analyze you", "I don't need a project" Brilliant!!!! Thank you so much for these tips.

[@redwaldcuthberting7195]

'I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request. Means no...' - Barbosa

[@synaesthesia4183]

Amazing quote hahaha. I use it all the time

[@sarahwoodward4453]

Omg I love you

[@JJ-iq8mi]

Great Pirates shout out.

[@marjoriegarner5369]

just say no.

[@theonorthcraft4558]

Your metaphor about restaurants and eating food has made me totally rethink things. It’s a perfect metaphor. Thank you, Lisa!

[@boomerangsruckflug8513]

Some people are only interested in themselves! They need an echoe to pimp up their vanity but never will ask us anything about our lives. Be aware, those guys probably are narcissists. My advice to all: never fall in love on some nice pics and some nice phrases in the chat! Never! Stay on the ground and get a better impression in a live date! And pleeeease, never get in a car with someone on a very first date! Good luck.💗

[@publicserviceannouncement4777]

I'm not a narcissist but I feel like if I ask someone a question I may say or ask something in the wrong way and offend someone. It probably does give people the impression I don't care about them but I actually do. I don't know how to get over my fear.

[@beencouraged4163]

Also don’t let them know your address or location of employment until you know they are safe. I used to meet them at the location of our planned date.

[@angelamurungah4439]

Why shouldn't I get in a car with them on the first date?

[@beencouraged4163]

@@angelamurungah4439 if you don’t know them very well it may not be safe. If it doesn’t work out and they are unstable mentally they could begin stalking you. It happened to me with a guy I went out with by way of a so-called “friend” and when he went to drop me off, he asked if he could see me again and I politely said I had a good time but I didn’t want a 2nd date he drove off and wouldn’t let me out the car until he could grasp why I didn’t want to go out with him. It got worse after that. Please stay safe🙏🙏🙏

[@joeysbestfriend2614]

Women also do that to men

[@Vercanya]

I would have needed wisdom like this when I was younger. This is exactly how so many men used to treat me and I didn't see how toxic it was because I was so desperate for love, for someone to tell me that I'm good enough.

[@sandicampbell8626]

I hear you exactly!

[@qkcmnt1242]

Most women do not realize, but men are too enamoured by the beauty of a woman, and think that surely she belongs to someone else, when the reality is, she's waiting on someone to 'notice' her. Oh, we're noticing all right. We're scared to death to approach you, lovely wall flower.

[@DF.7]

When I hear myself say, “ I can do bad all on my own “, in my mind I think subconsciously easier said then done. When more people like you continue to bring these, “red flags” into awareness, the more it’ seems less of a cliche. It makes me realize, I am not alone in this and makes me feel that it’s ok to be alone.

[@sidejobsCA]

i wish texting was a thing when i met my narcissist soon to-be exhusband back 15 years .. its easier to ghost and block someone now when my intuition kicks in!

[@a18sayavedra]

God sent me this video today. Blessings to Everyone!!!

[@Jenny-wl5mx]

I believe this also bless you x

[@vanessasouthern1792]

Same!!! Uncanny timing. I said last night could he send me a little voice record before bed as I feel lonely.... he totally ignored it. I'll take the hint. Thanks Lisa.

[@JohnSmith-lt3jl]

Texting is a lazy person’s way to properly communicating with someone-I am older and finding so many false women -wasted months due to me being genuine and respectful.

[@chrisnapoli8386]

I have said that many times as well - texting is a lazy persons way to communicate.

[@EagleZtoTheGrave]

Its ok to prefer face to face, but communication is communication. As long as its efficient it shouldnt matter, people can hide in text or in person, otherwise we should throw out all the books, blog & news print.

[@JohnSmith-lt3jl]

@@EagleZtoTheGrave Hi -agree texting is ok …to a point ….I have been on dating apps and you have good laugh then ask for date and they disappear-non stop love bombing texts but no meet ups is not good.

[@chrisnapoli8386]

@@EagleZtoTheGrave that’s true up to a point - but a phone call or face to face reveals much more than a text ever will. And when you get good at reading and interpreting voice tone and pitch and body language you can tell when someone is legit or not.

[@margomazzeo1680]

@@chrisnapoli8386 All that is missing with texting..we need those prompts to properly assess someones true intentions.

[@notesbynaq]

Oh my goodness when you talked about the crying!!!.. my crying happened AFTER we said "I do" when we were walking back down the aisle. I though it was so weird and I've told other people this but I just can't explain it...it wasn't exactly happy tears, it was a cry that was uncontrollable from the inside and it hurt and it felt like it was coming from another place deep within. It was a grievous cry that I probably mistaked for happy tears at the time,, but I know it wasn't .. I'll never forget it..the feeling. It was almost a sorrowful cry like my spirit was saying, "No sweetheart, what did you just do?" and it was more hell from there that point on with him.

[@Godlywoman88]

I lose interest very quickly with people who are self-centered now. I met a guy a few weeks back who asked for my number. He seemed nice in person so I gave it to him. He initiated texts, but didn't seem to know how to keep conversation going. I lost interest in replying to him at all. I also especially agree about that sign as well as those that come around for something. The narc that broke me was like that as well as never asked anything about me, except for surface things to make it seemed like he cared.

[@themarro6695]

The moment I got sent a questionnaire to answer about myself and there was no conversation…I knew he was a Narc!!

[@lisaaromano1]

Wow!!! A questionnaire ???

[@Kevin-py7hb]

@@lisaaromano1 I had a similar situation with someone recently that I friended on FB. Don't know this person, only her picture and a brief profile background. We texted on FB a few times back and forth, having a normal conversation... The next message I get is, "You never want to tell me anything about you", or something like that???? ... I was a little thrown by that comment and thought " wow, that was a direct question".... I responded with, " What would you like to know?" I said to her, " You go first and tell me a little about yourself, like hobbies, interests, etc..... After that message, I never got a response or another message again...????? I get the feeling that when you text/message on FB or whatever social media, the person on the other end is not legit???? I may be wrong and would like to believe in people's honesty..... It's so hard to meet someone with true intentions ..... Love all your videos Lisa.... That's why I'm single and loving it...... No BS or drama!!!!!!!

[@themarro6695]

@@lisaaromano1 Yes, Lisa! He sent me a message with questions without any conversation. Questions included “ Do you own your home? Are you able to relocate? How do you feel my ex wife still lives with me?”

[@themarro6695]

@@Kevin-py7hb It’s so difficult to meet genuine people. They hide behind the text messages!

[@themarro6695]

@@lisaaromano1 He basically wanted to use me. He didn’t make an effort to call and when he did call it was at certain times of the day. I think he was still married. I went NO CONTACT!

[@carlab1782]

Holy smokes. This is a master class and soooooo much more about our own standards than the title reveals. I wish I'd heard these messages decades ago! Having just started dating again in my mid-50s, I see how and why I've been settling for breadcrumbs. You don't even realize what a full meal tastes like or satisfies until you experience it with the right person. Thank you so much for this video, Lisa!

[@oscarwilliamson6163]

Carla B,You deserve better 🙏

[@debscornercanada]

THIS is SOOOO needed for the younger generation as well as older folks who have to dive back into dating or socializing... I also believe schools should have these ..

[@faychampoux345]

I think half of the planet is codependent! I was with a narcissist and she was very aloof. I had to stop loving the red flags out of her!…. and I see my part in it (love addict). Chasing the tread is a great way to describe it. I call it “chasing my mother’s gaze”. I’m now reaching for myself. Brilliant video!

[@truthbetold4097]

It would be nice to have a friendship that meaningful conversations can be had ,both ways.

[@nazcarcup]

24:09 Find myself in the same cycle of being ignored and only hit up when it is convenient or they need SUPPLY. I've cut ties with such people. I'm now seeing how my loneliness would lead to me accepting this BS.

[@wildanimus2559]

Once you get comfortable with being alone without being lonely, people like this will have no power over you in future encounters.

[@nazcarcup]

@@wildanimus2559 👍🏾

[@susanmcguire4664]

We need to stop allowing ourselves to be used by toxic people. It takes time and practice but it feels very good once you get them out of your life.

[@margomazzeo1680]

I too..was lonely and accepted BS..it was very painful and Im glad my narc left..

[@deborahdtw]

I call it “canned text”. It could have been for anyone.

[@lisaaromano1]

Omg yea that’s the perfect phrase!!

[@Nicole-kx9vg]

Yep. The copied & pasted. They don't want to put any energy nor invest ANY time.

[@aquarius_soul5704]

I like that. You've hit the nail on the head with this one.

[@noracharles9366]

BOT responses 🙄

[@LinYouToo]

Sometimes you have to unfriend friends in real life

[@withrowchelsinormanfzwicke4615]

My abusers saw me coming. Wish I had this great information before I met him...Thank you. DON'T BELIEVE WORDS BELIEVE THEY'RE ACTIONS.

[@SC-lb6cn]

He always had his phone in his hand when we were together. Found out he was in dating sites right beside me in bed. When he took hours and sometimes days to return a text I explained that someone I was previously in a relationship with, didn’t return my texts for a few weeks, and I then found out that he had passed away from a heart attack and when that happens now it makes me really really edgy and upset. Well, he started taking even longer to respond to my texts because I had told him a secret of something that hurt me and something that made me uncomfortable and he used it against me and that’s what they do with everything. No matter what it is, if they think they can use it against you, they will until you cut off all contact. They’ll never forget these things and they store hurtful buttons away like a computer and it’s a sick mind game they play. They’re awful awful people and remember they never loved you, because they’re incapable of loving anything other than being sinister. try not to ruminate and worry, and beat yourself up and feel worthless that you were rejected, which always happens in a narcissistic relationship, you always get discarded at some point and remember that no matter how it ended, you no longer have a vile piece of garbage in your life. You are ALWAYS better off once they are scraped out of your life like gum on your shoe.

[@2lucki333]

I feel like I got a free counseling session! 😉 seriously! Thank you Lisa! 💜

[@lisaaromano1]

Yay!!

[@teresanaron9064]

The marriage story was my first ever marriage/wedding...then 13 years of hell. No one knew or understood my struggles and I began to wonder if it was me that caused the issue, when it was him. His idea was, 'as long as I didnt make waves and fully followed his lead, that our marriage was perfect'....wow! I have grown immensley but that double damage during that marriage set me years behind in healing my childhood invisibility. Thank you Lisa for all of your learned insights❤

[@alexandriascott4656]

So true 💯! 🎯 Ive worked for narcissists who would never ever ask me how I am and when I always asked them I got met with dead silence.

[@DandyDuh]

Or they never ask you back 😒

[@HENCHMARV]

Thank you so much , sometimes you think your crazy or being sensitive. The truth is if you feel like the person is not interested in you 9/10 your right.

[@spreadthegospel6667]

This video is spot ON! Took me years to learn what happened to me and why I am the way I am… low self esteem for most of my life! I have learned and grown… I honestly enjoy my single life now!

[@nicholasczech6973]

Falling in love with someone who never feels the same may be the hardest part.

[@JK-te9sr]

Exactly, I identify with going through with the wedding and thinking the invitations are out, the money has been spent... it's too late to back out last minute...I married a psychopathic narcissist (I believe), my life became a hell, divorced for our baby son, but I lost everything, finances, relationships, I may have committed suicide but knew I had to be there for our son. Please all trust your gut, intuition,... canceling a wedding is nothing, and people that love you will want you to, others can deal with it. Such a big thank you Lisa for teaching me I matter too. And with a mom like you, I know your kids will be able to navigate this life blessed.

[@manuelasantner5519]

Thank you so much Lisa, I am a therapist myself and co-dependent. Altough I know all the theory it is still so difficult to get out of it myself and it is the first time that words really reached me on a deeper level. Despite knowing it all before, it is the first time, it came through. Thank you for that.

[@golondriz3]

Thank you Lisa. He doesn’t text back ever. He’s not interested.

[@danaparfitt2491]

What a lovely voice. I fell asleep and woke up to this, just an amazing voice.

[@charlottetheartist327]

Wish she was my MOM.

[@landonkids4935]

I get so insecure when I try to abandon the narcissist.

[@wildanimus2559]

I've been through this. It's scary and unsettling initially, but if you can remain loyal to yourself, in time you'll become stronger.

[@landonkids4935]

@Wild Animus Thank you!!!

[@aNnAkt1qw]

You are stronger than you think...... when you have had enough, really had enough! its your choice 💙

[@BrendaBaBoom]

I would feel insecure with an individual who is present but NOT “there.” Abandoning a Narc who is emotionally unavailable will become more of a relief in time.

[@lauratheexplorer6390]

You’re not abandoning a poor sick person like you might think. You’re actually moving towards self-preservation.

[@imsunnybaby]

i like that tagline... namaste and walk away

[@thankuwelcome2153]

One thing I look out for with online dating is if the message me “hey sexy” . That’s a red flag for me.

[@luisacordero1501]

Thank you! Because of your videos I started to respect myself enough to leave an abusive marriage. I now am happy and fulfilled, knowing I deserve better than bread crumbs. Again, thank you.

[@251omega]

I learned the hard way that a Giver + Taker relationship doesn't work. I often sadistically wished that my TAKER would meet another TAKER! But I always thought that a relationship of Giver + Giver, would actually be pretty wonderful. I realize now that that sidesteps healing the underlying problems that led to BEING a people-pleaser. Consequently, unaddressed problems could rise up to bite you. I'll bet that a relationship between two HEALING, RECOVERING Givers, might actually BE pretty wonderful! (I hope I live long enough to find out.)

[@Dragonfly_magictarot]

I remember a few years back when I would watch your videos. And though I am way passed that (meaning I am passed being in an abusive relationship)...Its nice to sit here now, after working on myself for so long, and feeling like you said "I rather be alone than miserable with someone" its so true. I stopped feeling stressed as soon as I broke things off. I've been living my best life ever since and I don't have anyone making me feel bad about my clairoyant abilities and my deep knowledge of Tarot and my own spiritual practices. I had someone make me feel bad about my job, my hobbies, my friends and even my body. Listen to the red flags

[@FawadZakai]

Thank you ma'am. This video made me cry. Gosh I wished I'd watched this video 23 years ago...

[@herewegoagain6604]

Thank you Lisa. You have helped me So much! Your videos and podcasts taught me that i was with a Narc. She cheated on me so many times and i stayed. You taught me about myself. I finally became strong and left her. I am now in a great and loving relationship with an amazing woman. Thank You for putting this information out there!

[@-melanie-1115]

Well, after the video, I just kicked out one guy, and made the other one angry, but now he is suddenly supersweet because he realises he is gonna loose me. And he really likes me. I am practicing boundaries, Lisa, thanks!!!

[@sirjacko79]

Love the "Signs you're texting Narcissist" title.. as if they aren't even worth "a" title 😆