11 Sept - Reducing meal plans once "target" weight is reached (!)

[@BloomingLisa]

Hey Tabs. Congrats on 10,000 subscribers!! (Although that means there’s lots of people with ED’s...but at least they are all looking for recovery support!) Thanks so much for your channel. You help so many people. Ps. Please give Teddy a big squeezy hug on my behalf *so cute*! 😊🦋🌈

[@BritLeigh77]

Exactly, Tabitha. I’m 34 years old, have let Anorexia rule my life for 20 years and am just finally believing that we DO ALWAYS have a choice. I think that is a hard truth to claim in the midst of the emotional war. Your videos highlight the truths that malnourished brains have forgotten. You’ve mentioned that recovery requires calling ourselves out on our own BS. I’m on day #7 of no exercise (you know the excruciating pain of this as someone that lived in a relationship with compulsive exercise), I’m starting to have less crying fits and am finally starting to feel hungry after I don’t know how long. It’s terrifying and amazing. I’m a healthcare professional and see how the healthcare system has undeniably contributed to and perpetuated the stigma around eating disorders- it’s like they actually want us to feel ashamed and maintain fat phobia. I’m so angry and sad about this, I can’t put it into words. Why don’t educated professionals know about the migration/flee to famine theory? Thank you for your critically important presence in this community. Do you think that healthcare will ever shift eating disorder treatment ? - it needs a complete overhaul. Also, I wonder what your thoughts are on perceptions of hunger and fullness now in recovery. For so many struggling the need to avoid fullness is strong. Do you enjoy feeling “full” (not stuffed) now that you are free of Anorexia? Did you have a point during recovery when you no longer wanted to feel hungry?Thank you for all you do.

[@saarki4903]

@Britney Beaulieu I feel the anger and sadness you mention too. And it's not just the treatment system: all of society is flooded with the mantra that dieting is good, eating 'too much' and/or certain things is something that's wrong and has to be made up for afterwards. It makes me feel so frustrated and hopeless. But, of course, I'm appalled the most by how ED 'professionals' approach us, eating, hunger, body(weight)s... I've written this before, but I can fill a book with NON-helpful shit I have been told or have read about how ED treatment or recovery should be. Thank God for people like Tabitha, hey? If only the professionals would listen too.

[@rachelburkett6124]

@@BritLeigh77 me too. I recently found Tabitha and it all just makes so much sense. We were looking into recovery centers that we could possibly afford and with the high relapse rate there really aren't any. I can't afford $8k just to plump me up and send me home because I'm at a "healthy weight" but still malnourished,mentally starving and in energy deficit so I'll be right back here within a few months. So I'm doing it on my own with the support of my husband and children. I'm 42 years old and ready to close this chapter I've been stuck in for 32 years.

[@natashaj4113]

Rachel Burkett hello lovely! I’m 34 and I’ve had anorexia for over 20 years too. I just wanted to reach out as it’s so hard to find people who are our age. You’re not on your own 💛 xxx

[@BritLeigh77]

Rachel Burkett You certainly are not alone. Did you see Tabitha’s recent video, “Do it” ? It hit home for me and was a big factor that pushed me to make the ‘no more exercise’ decision. Make sure you’re not at risk for refeeding syndrome though? You can do this/ you’ve lived with Anorexia for decades- we can choose to enjoy eating and resting. Eat, drink and be merry 💕 Wishing you all my support

[@BritLeigh77]

Natasha J I agree so much. 20 years is a long time beating down the Anorexic pathways, I know. But they can be changed. Rewire it! I’m with you in spirit. I hope you are embracing eating and resting today- we can. Keep us updated, the world needs our voices and success stories 💕

[@greernorton8419]

Loved this video. All so true. You are one amazing person. Thankyou for everything you do. You have helped me so much ❤️

[@eringerow2990]

Love this video. I’ve been in a weird quasi recovery for a while and I’m now seeing that I am still in it. Hoarding food and hoarding clothes is something I do - fear of weight gain leaves me constantly terrified that none of my clothes will fit - scarcity. Wow, thank you! I can see now what I need to work on next

[@greernorton8419]

Loved your video. Always so interesting and I learn so much. You have helped me out so much. Your one amazing woman ❤️

[@maeve8099]

Hi Tabitha! I just wanted to ask that is it normal if I still eat so much when im 3-3,5 months into recovery?

[@LM-cr6fm]

Yes! Very normal. All the time you have mental/physical hunger. Eat! Your body needed the nourishment❤️

[@krishafrancesca3679]

its my day 31 in recovery and this week, Im always eating a LARGE jar of peanut butter everyday! Is it bad to eat loads of fat everyday? :(( ive been eating so much this past week! And i know that im gaining weight coz im always bloated and having digestive issues because of the peanut butter everyday

[@user-qb4eb8vq5u]

Sorry if this has been asked but why do people who are over 600 lb exist? Is that an eating disorder? These people exist & it terrifies me (even though I know even if I tried I'd never be that, but how do these people accomplish being shut in their own houses because of their weight??)

[@chantalramirez5837]

dreamy realist such an excellent question really hope we get an answer

[@katieb8840]

It's not an eating disorder but hormonal disbalance. There are people who are deadly underweight from various illnesses too. You have anorexia, so stop comparing your illness to someone else's.

[@hollie1237]

How do I eat as much as possible when I’m at school. I can’t take a lot of food to school because there isn’t space in my bag or locker and I can’t eat it when I want because I’m in lessons all day? But during lessons I constantly think about food!

[@ceciliebreerthorsen]

I usually ask my teacher if I can go use the bathroom and then I just bring my bag (filled with snacks) with Me..

[@hollie1237]

Cecilie Breer Thorsen thanks but I think id be questioned as to why I’m bringing my bag with me, everyone would think it’s weird and I’d probably be in the bathroom for a long time eating 😂

[@saarki8421]

@@hollie1237 Is it possible to confide in your teacher? Tell him/her about this fight you're so bravely fighting and what you need to do to get your health and life back? I mean, if you had diabetes and would need to be excused from class every day to give yourself your injection so not to jeopardise your health, they would be supportive too, right? This being said, I just want to say WAW! You are so strong and, by the looks of it, kicking some ED-ass! 💪

[@hollie1237]

Saar Ki I wish I was fighting like I want to. But I keep getting better then restricting again and I don’t know what to do!!! 😬😬 I’m supposed to be following a meal plan but I just can’t manage it all ☹️

[@saarki8421]

@@hollie1237 You know what to do: not restrict! I know you probably hate me for saying this, but deep down you also know it's the truth. I know it's hard and you're scared and probably feeling like crap a lot of the time, but everytime you restrict (even when "only a little") you undo all of your recovery efforts. Do you have the feeling you are being limited by the meal plan?

[@Atalithan]

Do OCD decrase when gaining eventhough u dont rewire? I find it so so so difficult to stop my OCD, however im gaining but im feeling like im failing cause i cant stop OCD and then i think its no point work on gaining if i cant stop OCD witch i really cant, :'(

[@saarki8421]

Hi, I do not think OCD will necessarily decrease as your bodyweight increases. Perhaps behaviours related to the food scarcity mindset (e.g. hoarding) will go away, but I think that in order for the OCD to go awayw you have to ALSO do the rewiring. Like Tabitha always says: recovery is nutritional rehabilitation + neural rewiring. Without the latter you are basically just as sick and miserable on the inside, but in a visually less sick body. It is totally normal for OCD type behaviours to get worse as you attempt recovery. After all, they've become your brain's and body's go-to-behaviours. Do not let this discourage you or convince you that recovery is not possible or will cause harm. Recovery is hard. REALLY HARD, but you can do this if you put your mind to it.

[@saarki8421]

ps. You say you "really can't" stop the OCD. ... You CAN. You're just really really scared. And that's OK, that's normal. Just know that you cán do this, you cán stop the OCD. You're just letting the fear get to you and the ED is taking advantage of that, convincing you that you can't and horrible things will happen should you try to stop the OCD behaviours. Don't listen to it. And, yes, I know it's scary. But you don't have to do this alone. Ask help, the help you need. Or don't and do it by yourself, whatever works for you! You don't only have the key to a better life, you ARE the key ❤

[@Atalithan]

@@saarki8421 I really cant. :'( thats why i hoped i would get better if i keep gaining, now it just feel pointless to even try keep gaining. Last time i tried stop OCD i ended up in hospital for weeks after a serious suicid attempt, it was a miricle i survived. I feel so so so so so so so awful when not doing my routine. i cant stand it. But now it just feels like i would give up. I have been eating better and, as i said, gain and would pray to the OCD to get better while getting more healthy weight,..

[@saarki8421]

@@Atalithan So sorry to hear that ... can you get professional help for the OCD-aspect? Looks like you are perfectly capable of handling the ED-recovery-part, but tackling your OCD without help/guidance sounds very risky. However, I refuse to believe that there's no way out of this for you! The mere fact that you WANT for it to get better (not just ED, but also the OCD) is such a great and strong step/decision. I hope you can figure it out because even though I do not know you, I do believe you àre strong enough to face it all, even though you may not feel that way right now ❤

[@BriJo91]

What are your thoughts on veganism? I love eating vegan food and do not feel restricted in any way and my only motivation for it is my love for animals. Anytime I've tried to give it up, I get really depressed and I feel really guilty about eating animal products which leads me to use behaviors, so in my case I think veganism helps my recovery, but I know that's not always the case for everyone. Is it just something where you really have to be honest with yourself on why you are doing it? That's how I feel anyway. ✨Thank you so much.✨

[@chantalramirez5837]

Virtue hey girl ! Ex vegan here. I so believed that veganism was the way to go but from my experience and many others , it failed me . I did it the “ right way “ too and supplemented what was necessary but it did not work . I lost so much hair became so pale and anemic and had brain fog . I recommend you check out vegan deterioration to see for yourself what it does to people that’s what finally got me to stop being vegan . Also check out flow with chlo!

[@BriJo91]

@@chantalramirez5837 Thanks but I don't believe in that for one second. Plenty of very healthy vegans and there is nothing magical about animal products that you can't get with a well-balanced vegan diet and the necessary supplement(s). A lot of animal products have supplements added to them either during the raising of animals or afterwards so there is really no difference other than it's better for the environment and the animals. I think these days there are endless options of a vegan product so it's not even really restrictive. I think my main concern is that there's always in an assumption that veganism is a way to hide your eating disorder when I do not believe that is true for most people because you can eat total junk and crap and gain just as much weight from being vegan. Thanks for sharing but the major dietetic associations stand behind a vegan well-planned diet as being healthy and in some cases optimal.

[@mellowmorgan]

Vegan here! The only time there have been iffy moments was when I was trying to adhere somewhat to a WFPB diet... which isn't the same thing as being vegan at all and they are often used interchangeably, quite wrongly so. I ate a huge piece of vegan cake for breakfast this morning and found myself feeling guilty about all the sugar and oil in it because of the dangerous (for those with history of eds) "clean eating" mentality of WFPB diet I got mixed up in long after discovering veganism. Oreos and vegan processed food and nut butters you can find most anywhere so just don't purposefully avoid or limit those.

[@BriJo91]

@@mellowmorgan thank you for sharing 💚

[@emilyviolet110]

Hi! I was vegan but I knew it was only due to my ED. It hindered my recovery because I kept binging on sugary food that contained dairy and I kept feeling so guilty. I discussed it with my therapist and we both agreed the best way forward was to let go of being plant-based. I also felt bad because I knew I wasn’t doing it for the animals, I didn’t really care about them it was just for my ED. I do believe if you have a deep compassion for animals etc it’ll be fine because there is vegan ‘junk’ food nowadays so you’re not restricted. Hope this helps!

[@aydaamiry2962]

Am I the only one literary eating 24/7 due to mental hunger? Like physically my hunger is just ‘normal’ but mentally i’m always thinking of food, so i keep eating. I want it to stop so bad🥺

[@LM-cr6fm]

Me too!

[@saarki8421]

@Sofia I'm sure you're not alone in this. ... And even if you were: who cares!? YOUR body wants sweets, so that's what it should get! Without judgment and regardless of what another person's body wants/needs. Keep going 💪

[@saarki8421]

@Sofia We all share that fear ... But it's another ED lie. Tabitha has some great videos on this topic of gaining weight forever, perhaps you can check them out? Listen to your body, it's SMART! And, most importantly, it will never do anything to hurt you (can't say that about an ED!). Your body has no 'agenda' to bully you ("Haha! Let's make her morbidly obese for no reason!") or do stuff that would jeopardise your health. Your body is desperate to get healthy again (regardless of what ED's and twisted societies think). Your body wants to take care of itself, optimise health. When you have a scratch, you trust your body to re-grow the correct skin again, right? You don't go "OMG!!! What if my body keeps groing skin forever!? Will it know when to stop???". You are doing the brave and incredibly hard thing of listening to your body. Keep going. ❤

[@aydaamiry2962]

Sofia I literally eat packs of cookies just in one sitting. Nice to know im not alone haha

[@chantalramirez5837]

Trigger warning possibly : is there such thing “ as too much sugar in recovery “

[@kristinamiretinska3132]

No it isnt

[@ferricassie]

No

[@ceciliebreerthorsen]

absolutely NOT!

[@janecurzon9014]

How can we trust our bodies or brains when it's our brains that tell us to fear food?

[@maimoonajanbaaz5352]

Mam, please it's a humble request , your voice isn't much clear , please do something about it :) thanks you , love 😘

[@sergusbower1270]

My body is now telling me it’s not hungry anymore but since I started out eating so much now I just keep doing It development of BED after being anorexic for 30 years and exercise addiction this recovery way definitely wasn’t for me I’m in hell now

[@mollypage1549]

Coming to this vid more than a year later, but I'm hoping you see this comment! How do you continue justifying feeding mental hunger/ honoring cravings when you've gained so much weight through a short time in recovery (I went from underweight to overweight in 4 months... and I'm REALLY mentally not handling it well as I continue to gain and gain further towards obese territory) but still aren't nearly over the mental hunger/ constant cravings? I swear, every single day it feels like I'm binge-eating because I just won't stop eating the densest (peanut butter, granola, nuts, ice cream, etc.) foods available. It's hard to say "well, that's because I NEED them and my body needs them" when I've gained upwards of 50 lbs in just 4 months... I've gotta be far past my set point, but yet the mental hunger / binge-like episodes just won't quit. :/

[@Hannebambel__]

Hi how’re you doing now?