127: Complex Trauma in the Highly Sensitive Person

Welcome to a brand new Women In-Depth series hosted by Lourdes Viado and Carmen Schmidt Benedetti. This series focuses on highly sensitive persons (HSPs) who have experienced complex trauma.

In this episode Lourdes and Carmen hope listeners will get more clarity and understanding the experience and HSPs with complex trauma.

Dr. Lourdes Viado is a psychotherapist for anxious and overwhelmed highly sensitive women in Las Vegas, Nevada. She is a Myers-Briggs Typology Indicator (MBTI) Certified Practitioner and integrates Jungian psychology, mindfulness, neuroscience, and astrology into her work with clients. She is also the host of the Women In-Depth Podcast:  Conversations about the Inner Lives of Women, which has been downloaded over 350,000x in 96 countries.

Carmen Schmidt Benedetti is a psychotherapist for highly sensitive womxn in Sonoma County, California. She helps them to heal layers of unrecognized childhood trauma and create calm, balance and stability in their life. As a Certified EMDR therapist, Carmen guides adults in reframing their past from an empowered perspective, coming to believe they are ‘good enough’ and their needs and feelings matter.  

Topics discussed in this episode:
Complex Trauma and Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) (1:34) Challenges in recognizing Complex Trauma (3:36) Understanding high sensitivity (4:06) Challenges and gifts of recognizing complex trauma (4:55) A sense of validation & relief (5:53) What is Complex Trauma? (6:59) On-going experience without a clear end point (7:14) Physical or emotional abuse or neglect in childhood (7:22) Experiences within early relationships with caregivers (7:31) A parent unable to engage or respond emotionally for a variety of reasons (8:39) A child who is “parentified” and feels responsible for taking care of their parent (10:04) Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) Study (10:56) Study conducted between 1995 and 1997 regarding experiences in childhood that result in health issues for the individual (11:15) Some examples Physical, verbal & sexual abuse and physical & emotional neglect (11:22) A parent dealing with substance abuse or an addiction (11:41) A mother who is a victim of domestic violence (11:45) A family member in jail (11:53) A family member with a mental illness (11:53) The disappearance or absence of a parent through death, divorce, or abandonment (11:58) Potential consequences of parent not being present Child taking care of their siblings (12:41) Dealing with bullying by themselves (12:42) Child possibly being less safe due to lack of parental supervision (12:55) Resources ACES Study: acestoohigh.com/ (13:27) Dr. Jonice Webb’s work on Childhood Emotional Neglect: : drjonicewebb.com/ (13:45) What is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) (14:32) PTSD is in the DSM V - the manual therapists use to diagnose (14:54) Insurance companies require diagnosis based on the DSM V (15:14) Complex Trauma can be missed or misdiagnosed because it is not in the DSM V (15:43) PTSD is generally more familiar and recognizable (16:14) Some overlap between PTSD and Complex Trauma (16:38) Common Symptoms of PTSD that can show up differently in Complex Trauma (17:03) Usually caused by one-time events Feeling raw or on-edge Emotion response to a particular situation is out of proportion Avoiding places, people or things that remind them of the trauma Disconnecting to things or numbing out through substance use or mentally checking out (17:44) Acute Stress Disorder (ASD): what happens within the first 30 days after a traumatic event (18:20) PTSD continues this response beyond the first 30 days (18:20) PTSD layered on undiagnosed acute Complex Trauma is often the catalyst for seeking treatment (19:42) Vantage sensitivity for HSPs (21:31) HSPs’ emotional intensity and depth of processing amplifies the trauma experience (22:07) Presents challenges for the HSP and the parent of an HSP trying to manage these intense emotions (22:24) HSPs can struggle to regulate their emotions (23:23) HSPs can experience shame due to their emotional intensity (24:02) Common misdiagnosis of HSPs (24:30) Bipolar due to lack of familiarity with HSPs and/or Complex Trauma (24:39) Generalized Anxiety Disorder (24:55) Treatment of the physical symptoms of HSPs (25:25) Finding a mental health care provider familiar with HSPs and Complex Trauma can best help the HSP work through the overlapping issues (27:15.) Approximately 40-50% clients in therapy tend to be HSPs (29:30) Deeply understanding HSPs will help therapists working to support their clients’ healing (30:50)
Resources:
Carmen’s...

[@LourdesViadoPhDMFT]

Survey Invitation for HSPS who have experienced Trauma We're in the process of creating resources that are beneficial for Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) who have experienced trauma. We’ve developed a questionnaire in order to best understand what’s most helpful. If this applies to you, and you’re interested in learning more about this topic, we would love to have you participate in this survey. Your responses are anonymous unless you choose to provide that information. Please feel free to share the link with others! Link to survey: forms.gle/bmWQrDNFJ8frXT6W9 Lourdes Viado, PhD, LMFT and Carmen Schmidt Benedetti, LMFT

[@travelingrealms6095]

I literally almost cried because you explained my entire life.

[@brianlund7862]

Honestly I didn't sleep last night, I was so excited and happy to meet and learn about myself for the first time. And I've spent a lotttttttt of time in therapy, recovery, spiritual practice, etc. Blew my mind to finally hear about this. Best of luck with this journey 💛🙏

[@LourdesViadoPhDMFT]

I'm grateful that this episode was meaningful for you, that you felt seen and validated.

[@sharonaumani8827]

I am almost 65 years old. Listening to this still makes me want to burst into tears, bringing it all in the forefront. It has been a rough life, especially having grown up invisible.

[@Fiawordweaver]

My trauma molestation (father from jr high through HS) bullying emotionally (mother. She always told me I was selfish when I was upset. Or if I just disappeared in my room. I was told I was too moody. After dinner I always ad a stomach ache and was in the bathroom. My mother accused me of trying get out of doing the dishes. The brothers didn’t have to do the dish’s. , ) 5 brothers. My father convinced me that I was mentally ill. My mother shoved the molestation under the carpet when I revealed it at 28. I am 68 and working with my psychiatrist of 28 years and finally ready to hear that the molestation was factual and my mother groomed me to always mother her. She finally died this year at 96. She lived way too long and I couldn’t stop her from messing with my head. I had brain surgery in 2018. My oldest brother already died of cancer. My mother and brothers didn’t even check on me. (A meningioma). I finally can have a life. My father died in 1989 and was never accountable. My oldest brother with a different biological father invited me to live with him and his wife. (I went and felt safe for a period years. Bit then I chose people that validated that I wasn’t good enough.)He didn’t know all the dysfunction but suffered from beatings by my father and wanted to give me a safe home. I have distanced myself from the other brothers. They disbelieved me. I get a panic attack just thinking about them. I hate being so sensitive. I’m rambling because I had a trigger today. I just want to feel calm and not feel guilty all the time. I have been anxious from 3 years of age because my memories go back that far.

[@karate4348]

Kimi, Your words are so clear and powerful. Please keep writing and if you ever do a blog, please let me know. I have never heard of the concept of a mother grooming us to take care of her. Thanks for that. Roar forward with your own life. You deserve that!

[@Fiawordweaver]

@@karate4348 thank you for your generous kind words. I usually get bully responses. When I do get the bully responses I can interpret the responses as hitting a nerve in some unkind soul. You are very kind. Again thank you. Wow a blog, that gives me something to think about that I never considered.

[@kylow935]

Much love for you see❤️❤️

[@Froglet1968]

Oh I just hate that you weren't seen, heard or valued. It's very brave of you to share your story on here. I can relate to some of what you say and being shamed is horrible. I hope you can find some peace and know there is love coming to you from the UK. I think I was meant to have insomnia to read your post....

[@Fiawordweaver]

@@kylow935 thank you from my heart

[@emiliam778]

very helpful conversation, thank you

[@LourdesViadoPhDMFT]

Glad this was helpful, thank you for listening!

[@sharonaumani8827]

I realized I hadn't finished listening to this podcast before answering your questions in your survey [from one year ago] about what info I want, as you are addressing some of it, right here, thanks [in terms of all of the overlap]. You are bringing up so many painful things I can [continue to] relate to :(

[@victoriaani250]

Thank you a trillion for sharing, this is very helpful 🙏

[@karenbird1279]

I am HSP with Complex trauma but my former therapist diagnosed me with Bordelrline Personality Disorder. So I was thinking this would be a great subject to talk about, and how they intersect or differ. Thank you!!

[@CaroToro28]

Thank your very much!

[@LourdesViadoPhDMFT]

Thank you for listening!

[@dimitrijmaslov1209]

Thanks!

[@LourdesViadoPhDMFT]

Thank you for listening!

[@drumgrandpa]

Winter always comes to an end, always. Maxime Lagacé

[@kempath1310]

thank you. i feel so alone and can't afford therapy.

[@KJ-qq8er]

I'm not a researcher or therapist, but I'm really trying to understand complex trauma. How do you tell the difference between a highly sensitive person and someone who develops hypersensitivity from trauma?

[@shahilagh]

I think HSPs r always sensitive. but the second group r sensitive when there is a flashback or a trigger. and I also think the nature of the 1st sensitivity is different with the second.

[@LourdesViadoPhDMFT]

Thank you for asking this important question. It can be very difficult to tell where the trait of sensitivity ends and trauma behaviors and symptoms begin, and there is definitely overlap. There's a lot to the answer, and I plan to address this in future content. If you haven't already, pls check out episode 134: HSPs & Complex Trauma Series: Where Does Your Anxiety Come From? Even though this episode focuses on anxiety, I think it can shed some light on your question. Also, Carmen and I are in the process of creating more resources (courses, podcasts) that are beneficial for Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) who have experienced trauma. We’ve developed a questionnaire in order to best understand what’s most helpful. If you're interested, we would love to have you participate in this survey. Your responses are anonymous unless you choose to provide that information. Link to survey: forms.gle/bmWQrDNFJ8frXT6W9

[@dM-ij1we]

I would also be interested on how to differentiate between the two. Any information that you have gathered would be highly appreciated. Thanks.

[@hecila]

Is it my KZbin or is the Resources section cut off?

[@LourdesViadoPhDMFT]

It's not you, yes the Resources section is cut off! Here's a link to the full show notes. Thank you for listening! lourdesviado.com/127-complex-trauma-in-the-highly-sensitive-person/

[@es4666]

What about hsp and complex ptsd?

[@heather77777]

Hi, "Complex Trauma" is used interchangeably with "Complex PTSD"...they are the same thing.