129 Ways To Get A Husband in the 1950s | Alonzo Lerone

[@alonzo]

my bad about the last 10 minutes,. I almost lost a lung from laughing too much

[@mog-gyveroneill2500]

I was too busy crying with laughter myself to even notice! 😂😂😂

[@LumosYagami]

😂😂😂😂

[@chillediceoffrost4380]

I love when you laugh!

[@Nihilstorm]

I've never clicked so fast on a notification before

[@brooklyn2145]

The wolves one I just died 🤣

[@ebonelove]

If BuzzFeed existed in the 1950's this would be their first article lol

[@Cheri1983]

Lol god u are right throw in a couple of which person are you quizzes and its 100%

[@KatMEW93Productions]

The magazine version of buzzfeed right here 😂

[@actionjackson3522]

Buzzfeed (1950s): What's the Best Way to Find a Husband? Click This Article to Find Out!

[@maaniiigill5898]

I was like 999😳

[@ShonKey6756]

ebone literally in tears🤣🤣

[@katherinethedork2706]

People of the 1950s: We aren’t desperate Also people of the 1950s: *buys Convertible to impress a guy*

[@sarahlovee4229]

Messes up convertible in front of men's only spa

[@lindseynobody4865]

People who were alive in the 50's: STUPID MILLENNIALS

[@sharpaycutie2]

2019: still desperate

[@mandapanda234]

No man back then wanted a woman to drive him around 😂😂😂

[@nopity3057]

@@lindseynobody4865 How about you make a valid insult?

[@bnadira212]

When he fake fell "And no one's gonna help her!?" 😂💀

[@mandapanda234]

That one killed me 😂😂😂

[@NaturallyDOPE0990]

I keep watching that part 🤣🤣😭😭😭

[@sairi_a]

That was hilarious (constant replay)

[@nopity3057]

… Well what do you want me to do about it???

[@londonsmi9461]

Lol

[@briannarichardson9511]

I love how he's like "I am offended as a woman, and I'm not even a woman!"

[@aurthurpendragon1015]

I'm offended as a man that they think we're all that fucking easy. And I don't offend easily, either.

[@jaynebugs]

"You want a girl to give up her knowledge JUST FOR A MAN?!" "Look, I'm a guy and I wouldn't even join a hiking club..." "You might actually fall in love with yourself doing all that!" "I wanna wholeheartedly apologize for this magazine." You get so many points for being an overall respectful and decent dude! 😊

[@alexnajera3483]

You had an even 400 likes. I liked just to make it uneven as 401

[@jaynebugs]

@@alexnajera3483 I'm cool with that! 🤣

[@randomdude7778]

I made it even again at 444

[@ibullyidioticdrfans8214]

468

[@jaynebugs]

You guys are cracking me up! 🤣

[@hogtipoo]

Alonzo: "I don't know what cultivate means" Me: Looks like you really need a DICTIONARY

[@nisarojas2869]

This isn’t the first time, sadly

[@alanak.7539]

hogtipoo. It means to sacrifice someone, apparently. 😂

[@hogtipoo]

The whole point is it has nothing to do with sacrificing anyone like Alonzo thought. Good day

[@kim7990]

No but he needs a DICTionary

[@akashicisis]

It's a gardening reference, it means to grow and care for. In people terms, it means to intentionally develop a relationship.

[@ExistentialNathan]

Alonzo: “I don’t know what “cultivate” is but I hope it doesn’t mean sacrifice” Every farmer in 2019 harvesting their crop: 👀👀👀

[@lindseynobody4865]

It isn't just a farming or gardening term...

[@ExistentialNathan]

When the trolls try!

[@lissawhit966]

I took myself out for a whole date once. Dressed up did my makeup, went shopping, ate by myself, and went to a movie by myself. One of the best days of my life

[@wr4thfl]

I seriously want to do this but I'm to broke😭😭 you go girl

[@lizzybearstar1661]

I do that all the time just because I like my time like myself to myself time

[@AmberAmbwee]

“Learn several funny stories... don’t tell them to him more than once.” Me: *sends same meme to boyfriend 20 times*

[@dakid40777]

Amber Ambwee lol yup he loves you if he accepted that 20 times

[@lindseynobody4865]

I like that they were learning funny stories from somewhere instead of telling about things that actually happened to them lol

[@nopity3057]

@@lindseynobody4865 If only that were the case…

[@kidneytransplantwarrior21]

Lol

[@taravcurtis11]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@lorenaarnette6395]

Me to my coworker: Hey, I’m going to a party this weekend. Wanna come? Him: ok. We have been married for 12yrs, so far.

[@ameliabedelia2170]

AWWWWW😚😙😗😍😘🤩

[@astra_nov8277]

If only life was this easy

[@danielholmes7006]

More like "How to catch a serial killer" 😂

[@angelamontoya8032]

Gemma Brunning or how to get killed

[@kimberlylitaker2534]

Yep! Agreed

[@thickkysmalls]

Ted Bundy

[@nopity3057]

Who is the serial killer? Me???

[@CatrionaCharles]

“Don’t discuss your former husband”...you know, the dead one! 😂

[@nopity3057]

… Which one was that? I forget the ones I've killed myself.

[@whoami23358]

@No Pity what? Please tell me you’re still alive Edit: sorry I just probably misunderstood the words

[@tiffanytheclinician]

@@whoami23358 haha she meant that she’s killed her husbands before😂

[@SimsAllAround]

That was one of my favorite ones xDD

[@xoxo_zesty]

“Suanne YOU BROKE! You already got a kid now and a wolf!” 😂😂😂😂 im in tears

[@jamie.lynn004]

"I'm not trying to hit a golf ball and chase that thing too!" I'm in class and I nearly screamed😂😂😂

[@jeniferwimberly2518]

ItzBocaBitch 😂😂😂😂

[@PrettyP001]

Lmao😂😂😂

[@wr4thfl]

Watching Alonzo in class is not the best thing to do😭😭😭 that man is too funny I'd laugh way to much

[@YummyLambCurry]

imterviewer: what kind of husband material are you looking for miss? girl: wolves.

[@bubblequeen2k219]

LMAO 😂😂😂😂😂

[@lucasbiermann257]

well wolves meant guys that date a lot back then. man that just want to have sex and no serious relationships.

[@nopity3057]

So a pack hunter or a lone hunter???

[@mady9105]

That's tonks from harry potter

[@nopity3057]

@@mady9105 ???

[@sandywolfr26]

Many of these tips seem like how to get killed than get a man lol

[@SarahMacDani]

129 ways to get murdered

[@cassandradube-savard5213]

😂

[@jaqjynx]

Clearly the 1950s hasn’t watched the Hostel franchise.

[@Fister_of_Muppets]

And on that note, it seems like women haven't changed much between the 1950's and now. "Traveling to Europe" is now posting your whole daily life on Facebook.

[@Bayougirl78]

Yeah, a lot of these "tips" sound like the beginning of a Criminal Minds episode, lol!

[@adhelm6107]

Alonzo: Laughing over and over again Cash: Minding his business 😂😂😂

[@BigTimeRush14100]

Nobody: This Entire Video: Alonzo: They want me as a woman to do what now?????

[@sklauda1]

"If he has a flat, offer to fix it for him." Didn't Ted Bundy catch victims like that?

[@Carpathianpixie]

OMG!

[@ellegutierrez2148]

yea xD

[@Veronica-gr5se]

Scrubbing=washing up/showering Junior=the young man who's gone courting Wolf=the bad boys Whispering campaign=gossip

[@luvnkira]

this helped alot xD

[@TheCarnivoreSoprano]

Thanks!

[@scousemouse9566]

Junior here means your son

[@AJRome7]

Phi beta kappa is a honor society...so don’t mention the high grades you received in college to potential husbands😂😂

[@Fister_of_Muppets]

There was also an article from that time period that told women "If your man comes home late, be was working hard, so don't ask. Also, wash your vagina with Lysol." People haven't changed much, but tactics have lol.

[@chuchiesworld]

“Don’t marry a guy who has too many loose buttons” = don’t marry a guy if he crazy

[@christino3852]

Jae's World What does it matter at this point, with all those techniques you’ve already attracted twenty serial killers

[@greatleader4841]

I think it means don't marry a guy who is too lazy to take care of his suit or that it shows that he's unattractive to every woman. (going back to the sewing kit and learning how to sew.)

[@davidvilchez2209]

There are more crazy women out there than men, at least here in Florida anyway

[@laurahinrichsen3917]

@@davidvilchez2209 then how come all the articles start with "Florida man..."

[@monbooboothefool1937]

Jae's World 500th like just bc

[@sanaab8855]

"Eat alone by yourself" 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@monica_0381]

Sanaa B “y’all gotta eat alone by yourself”😂😂😂

[@djdesantis4568]

Sanaa B Like when teachers would tell you to read silently to yourself. Who the hell else am I gonna read SILENTLY to?!!?

[@monica_0381]

Sanaa B LMFAOOOO RIGHT 😂😂😂

[@TheCarnivoreSoprano]

Yup! Lol

[@mazvitaselemani]

Right?😂😂😂

[@megb8851]

"129 ways to be abducted and found in a freezer"

[@ajheartsong]

I was gonna say this! 🤣

[@Liyah_Marie97]

😂😂😂😂 I'm good

[@jadamontagne5124]

-Oop

[@madison-Roccoa-Mason-drake]

No 129 to get abducted and sold into slavery

[@mrs.martin3158]

Fact.

[@michelletuband]

Makes you wonder how the follow-up article "129 Way to get a Wife" looked like.

[@azsli2]

Be rich ,dress nice,ask her dad

[@nopity3057]

… you forgot about being the psychotic mass murderer one if he is desperate.

[@jenmalcom7004]

There weren't 129 ways to get a wife. The #1 way was to knock her up. Then you HAD to marry her!

[@csmith2662]

Lol it was probably just “stand still and wait for women to hunt YOU down. No need to do any unnecessary work.” And for the widowers “Don’t be sad about your previous wife, you know, the dead one...another one will be along shortly. Driving a convertible JUST to cheer you up!”

[@TheRookiecop1]

No. 28: Buy a convertable...bitches love convertables.

[@classelouci]

Did anyone else think "bend and snap" with the Handkerchief one..

[@imaniluvsu1]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 my FIRST thought!

[@nephi3360]

Totally did. XD

[@reanna6666]

Yes!!!

[@shantellakaladypersephone8671]

Yep, and immediately said my favorite part, "Ohmygod, the 'bend and snap'! Works every tiiimmmee.."

[@starfire4628]

🤣 🤣 🤣

[@musicgurl162010]

Some of these seem like good ways to get abducted

[@AgdaFingers]

I know - and probably murdered or knocked up.

[@Lilly_watermelonsugar]

In 2019 definitely

[@donkeyhobo34]

I like the sweetheart type but I still want her to her herself

[@nisarojas2869]

Or given the not alive

[@uniquerebeljaney3639]

129 ways to get murdered.

[@kr1048]

Alonzo: I don't know what cultivate means. Me: Get a Dictionary!!!

[@Cobalt_Rain]

I INSTANTLY started cracking up over this one and immediately scrolled down to the comments to see others reactions

[@mindytenerias2927]

Lol. That's what I was thinking

[@jamssnana4084]

41 years ago, a good-looking guy came to my counter at the hospital asking for change for a dollar. He was a paramedic. I knew right away that he was the one. We had our 40th anniversary in February. All started with change for a dollar. ❤

[@katievarnum]

I take myself out on a date once a month, I go to the library and get a good book; then I go to Panera bread and get a bowl of cheddar broccoli and read.

[@chaotic.content]

I had jury duty once. there were no eligible bachelors there, just old ladies and a lot of stress 😅

[@TheCarnivoreSoprano]

Lol!

[@MarilynMonday]

YOU were the eligible bachelor lol

[@Itsss.kyyyyy_]

@@MarilynMonday lol

[@056561022]

... Even old ladies gotta commit crimes like "soliciting for husbands" by billboard now... Man, this economy is rough.

[@Just-A-Gamer1524]

I was the youngest by a good 30 years 😂 my town is more of a retirement community and idk how I got picked

[@kinleymae5120]

*SIS WE’RE BEING HONEST HERE! YOU BROKE! YOU HAVE NO MONEY HERE ANYMORE* ... *YOU GOT A KID NOW YOU GOTTA WOLF!*

[@sarahwells1362]

I died laughing at this :'D

[@ootwpublishingmedia7894]

@@sarahwells1362 I read it while he was saying it lmfao

[@we_muzt_rize_up8665]

Haha... and a corvertible... lol

[@rayslifexo6692]

"Eat alone by yourself" Honey I do that already (I have no friends 😂)

[@savvy3096]

Meee

[@opalescentrosesb.w.3774]

Honestly same!

[@peacesignlover02]

That’s what I’m saying!😂

[@janishahenry5891]

I'd say let's all be friends but it wouldn't last. I can't keep those things for some reason 😂😂😂

[@kevin-no-gates6229]

Dats sad and sorta off putting... I'm sure you all are wonderful ppl.

[@drpax2417]

How to get a man in 2019 Step 1: Learn all the memes Step 2: Share the memes Step 3: It's raining men

[@suzakuscorpio79]

This also works if you are gay.

[@SimsAllAround]

Amen

[@harpsechord1755]

Step 4: ??? Step 5: Offer to bury the ones that didn't survive the human rainfall. Step 6: Profit.

[@avaseanmacon6648]

How I got my husband... (He was a local musician) 1) went to all of his shows 2) got aquatinted and swapped numbers 3) after several convos, found out where he lived 4) randomly started bringing him lunch 5) upgrade to bringing full on groceries 6) washed his laundry ...we've been together almost 10 years, married for 6 years and have 3 kids together...

[@SimsAllAround]

None of which was in that article xD

[@avaseanmacon6648]

@@SimsAllAround exactly... Just adding a few things that might help others. Lol

[@SimsAllAround]

@@avaseanmacon6648 No, no, I like that - it just proves this article is INSANE XDD

[@avaseanmacon6648]

@@SimsAllAround valid point

[@angelmason23]

Me: who's doing any of this Also me: buys newspaper and checks the obituaries (judge me if you must)

[@alonzo]

La Tanya No judgement here lol

[@sentorra31]

I don't blame you girl! The pickings are slim 🤣🤣🤣

[@That1BlackGuy]

If its a widower atleast you know hes experienced with relationships lmao

[@MaebyToday]

@@That1BlackGuy Or he kills his wives

[@That1BlackGuy]

@@MaebyToday i mean...thats the game of life lmao

[@kai4973]

Alonzo: "eat alone by yourself" Me, *in the dark, sitting under the covers with a 10 piece chicken nugget* Done

[@anthonyy_vivid5438]

Fact

[@nopity3057]

I eat alone down my road on an island where I am the only person. Don't ask me where I have no maps or information centres. :(

[@ThePuff_]

Lit 👌🏾

[@taravcurtis11]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@inkheart151]

One of my many life goals as an adult is to make a pillow and blanket fort and eat happy comfort food under it, so yes I shall be taking that advice, 1950’s column, and eat entirely alone in the comfort of my fluffy fortress. XD

[@uluvgabbagab]

Who else looks forward to the “Get a dictionary,” in his intro😂😂

[@Munchkin325]

I say it with him now 😂

[@golddog0113]

Same, then my mom yells at me for saying it out loud 😂

[@gregoryrussell2327]

Gabryelle Lashae didnt see any thumbs downs on this one.

[@lindseynobody4865]

Yeah but I also look forward to him not knowing easy words after saying it

[@victhebric66]

I feel like this article is strictly for desperate women lol

[@scarletsamurai8243]

RTNANDEZ96 or psychotic women...

[@nopity3057]

Or psychotic mass murderers…

[@mariisnugget8406]

Or ones who want to become a victim for a murder mystery

[@nopity3057]

@@mariisnugget8406 I am the psychotic mass murderer…

[@ShaniceW494]

No Pity than this article is for you 😂

[@katc1883]

“wow there must have been a lot of dead husbands back then” lol it hadn’t been that long since the end of WWII😂

[@inkheart151]

Ohhhhhhh! That’s right! I guess that was published to help with slim pickings. A terrible article, but I guess at the time they were trying to help

[@Queen.Lady.Jocelyn]

I met my husband while I was a laundry room attendant. And we actually got married there 4 years ago.

[@QueenAwesomenes]

You got married in a laundry room......

[@Queen.Lady.Jocelyn]

@@QueenAwesomenes yes and the owner was an ordained minister. Very convenient!!!! It meant alot cause that's where we really met and got to know each other cause he did not know how to wash clothes😂.

[@pikalee3492]

@@Queen.Lady.Jocelyn That's so cute and sweet ♥️

[@xxPantherBabe]

QueenAwesomenes they saved a lot of money by switching to laundromat

[@mkayla5718]

That’s actually so adorable

[@lillypieisme]

There should be an updated article “How to find a husband in 2019.”

[@thebardisashieldmaiden1754]

Lol no, it would be worse.

[@stephielynn]

Let's start: 1. If he has less than 300 followers on Instagram...walk away 🙄😂😂😂😂

[@lillypieisme]

Stephanie Crookston But I have less than 300 followers. 😂

[@Ash_aa_90]

@@stephielynn 2. If he has a "fire" mixtape? Let him hit 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@nightshift7538]

Stephanie Crookston i don’t have Instagram!

[@amykathleen7777]

We actually reviewed this in my human services class to demonstrate how things have changed. Glad to see Alonzo laughing at it too !

[@Lycan4]

"Stow away on a battleship." I had to pause the video. XD

[@ObadiahQRex]

TimeStamp.

[@iriswhite3184]

A whisper campaign is basically when you start rumors about your self or someone else. For example "I heard Susan is really rich".

[@jeannerichard5947]

I also heard that she has a kid and a wolf

[@username_adrien256]

Women got the right to vote in 1920. They were able to vote in the 1950’s, Alonzo.

[@kvngcasim7712]

Not in NC and SC

[@koffeekueein4476]

Lol I was looking for this if not I was gunna comment. Still love you Alonzo

[@kvngcasim7712]

Koffee Kueein but y’all know not every state let women vote at the same time. He’s right for NC where he lives...

[@EmeraldHW]

It became federal law in 1920. So yes, in every state.

[@username_adrien256]

KvngCasim Woman’s suffrage was given in the 19th Amendment, which was ratified late 1920. It was federal law, so women in all states were allowed. Sorry if this came off condescending or like I’m calling you dumb, I’m just a history nerd and felt I needed to comment the original post because of the incorrect info.

[@territerrific7844]

A lady approached my father at my mothers grave and invited him out for coffee in case he wanted "to talk". I just had to tell her off.

[@ShadesAndBoots]

👀 The gall

[@redhotcandy6629]

Wow that's crazy, I would have just slipped him my number and told him if he needed anything then just call me;)

[@uniquerebeljaney3639]

She must have read this article.

[@hippysheep1023]

It might be that they simply need someone to talk too. I'm just saying. Sometimes people try to find others who have gone thru the same thing and simply connect with someone who had gone they the same thing.

[@Animefreak242]

Gross

[@scarletnight4554]

I love how it gets progressively more ridiculous, over time

[@056561022]

This article was written either by a man who was given a number by another man and outright panicked, or was written by a feminist as satire. Maybe both.

[@CamoSquid]

14:01 "There must have been a lot of dead husbands back then." That makes sense, connsidering the time period

[@starfire4628]

He's laughing so hard it sounds like he's saying woof instead of a wolf😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🐺🐺

[@williamh2607]

I feel like golf started when someone got creative while playing fetch with a dog

[@psistis80]

Type Robbin Williams-Golf and you will know the truth.

[@narcolepticaxolotl4970]

So they decided to cut out the dog and do the fetching themselves.

[@Emilytheswiftie1989]

Their dog died and they got lonely

[@williamh2607]

@@psistis80 thank you.

[@Event._Horizons]

could you do "How to get a *wife* in the 1950s"? love your vids man (and them Wendy's clapbacks i swear)

[@abadenoughdude300]

By the logic of this article, it'd probably be 1) get out of your house and grab one. The End

[@MarilynMonday]

"Find the biggest stick. Hit woman on head. Grab her by the hair and drag her back to your cave. Wife."

[@Event._Horizons]

@@MarilynMonday lol

[@MephistoAngel]

Omgosh I’m dying!!! 😂😂 I’m one of your viewers born in 1952 & I remember so many of these (via tv or just hearing. I was only 6 so....) I used to build Boy Traps in the school playground by digging holes & covering them with popsicle sticks, hoping a boy would fall in! 😂😂

[@Cassxowary]

there's an idea! setting up an "accident" so he gets hurt and then you can take care of him and he'd fall for you!😂😂 (granted, that's a more intense version of what you meant but either way 😂😂)

[@inkheart151]

Did it work?

[@crystalshoup6343]

“Not one person would volunteer for jury duty” You haven’t met my husband 😂

[@taishlyons7978]

"Don't buy something too expensive … CAUSE YOU BROKE"

[@Violet.05]

When he said "send his mother a birthday card" I thought he was gonna say "set his mother on fire" Tf is wrong with me 😂😂😂

[@TheCarnivoreSoprano]

Damn! Lol

[@perryj6332]

I legit snorted when I read this, lol.

[@ShadesAndBoots]

👀 I... don't... know. But never let anyone hypnotize you. I wouldn't trust any uninhibited actions if I was you.

[@Violet.05]

Dang, that escalated quickly "tell his friends nice things about him" "SET HIS MOTHER ON FIRE"

[@haleyabbott7735]

Lol, Supernatural?

[@enitsirknaej5915]

"Another lint licker"=died

[@imaniluvsu1]

I guess he doesn't know what that means. 😂😂😂😂

[@NatashaCine]

We don’t catch husbands now a days. We stuck in situationships.

[@djdesantis4568]

NatashaCine Situationships!! Omg! I’m deaded 😆😆😆

[@EndisNai]

When the comments section gets too real...😂

[@SwiftDemise242]

We got situationships because too many girls missed the part about keeping their innocence and losing their ignorance. Too many dumb chicks opened their legs to the first pretty face that made a pass at them.

[@linad9659]

@@SwiftDemise242 yeah well cannot agree. Got my first boyfriend at 19 (just as a try 'cause thinking of relationships gives me anxiety). He was also my first one after I was 100% sure that I only want him. Now we are in a... "situationship" that might end us (to make sure he is a 'little' older than me so I expect him to be grown and making right decisions). If we are going to break up I will never get a boyfriend again. Because I wanted him for the rest of my life and I don't want to fuck around till I find my prince that do not even exist.

[@bsinita_wokeone]

@@linad9659 sweetie let your boyfriend go and find someone new when you're ready, don't give up on love like that you're way too young for that just live your life. You'll find a boyfriend again that will respect you and love you it's not completely hopeless if you both put in the work it will work. But for now live your life and it's okay to have casual sex every now and then just use protection. I'm telling you this as a 31 year old.

[@Who-Dunnit]

"Girls who whine stay on the vine" cuz they dont get picked 😂

[@sherwinjohnson2794]

Then they become raisins 😆 (just an observation). 🤔Did raisins exist back then?

[@ObadiahQRex]

​@sherwinjohnson2794 Yes

[@MeGaTrOn-rv3wm]

“THEY HAD CONTACT LENSES BACK THEN?!!”

[@suzakuscorpio79]

yes, but they felt like shards of glass constantly poking your eyeballs (according to my Mother)

[@aliyahp9969]

Yup

[@marygoodrich321]

Yes my mom said she was a teenager back then she said they weren't like we have now she said they were uncomfortable

[@smilesnluvd6526]

Hard lenses feel about the same way.

[@ladypharoah5929]

Yeah, they were literally made of glass 😬

[@SootyDreams]

Getting a husband was so simple back in the day.

[@abadenoughdude300]

Yeah, all you needed to do was drive your convertible to a naval base and stow away on a battleship.

[@SootyDreams]

@@abadenoughdude300 I assume that was a joke as a response to my sarcasm?

[@MarilynMonday]

@@abadenoughdude300 😂🤣😂🤣👏👏👏

[@abadenoughdude300]

@@SootyDreams You assume correctly.

[@doctorwhofan2495]

Eh I still wouldn't be able to get a man tbh.

[@jaszjoshua1134]

I’d throw a poke ball at him 🤷🏾‍♀️ then be like “ it’s above me now”

[@TheCarnivoreSoprano]

Good one lol

[@brynnthompson6661]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@kaykay5771]

“you got a kid now, you got a WoLf”🤣🤣

[@nopity3057]

Why do I get the feeling your hinting that the child is a werewolf???

[@kyleerivera3087]

Me wearing bandaid: Person: Omg what happen? :( Me: Got hurt when I fell from heaven

[@Amber-Mae]

LOL when u gotta make all your own punchlines

[@nopity3057]

@@Amber-Mae Actually its not laughing matter… At least I don't think it is.

[@frost.bytten2023]

Scraped my knee crawling out of hell.

[@eej1983able]

Dude lolol 🤣

[@TheScutie90]

“You already got a kid now...you got a wolf”😂😂😂😂😂😂 I can’t stop watching that part lmao

[@melindarivera6598]

"I don't know what cultivate means" Alfonzo you need to "Get a dictionary!!" Lol 😂😂

[@savannahwestover2538]

I love how his mind automatically went “sacrifice”

[@carinu5444]

Hilarious

[@jennasotelo166]

*Alonzo 😂

[@casecoomes1197]

whos alfonzo 🤣🤣

[@cheneethompson5756]

@@casecoomes1197 alfonso is Carlton banks' real name!

[@helenluna7401]

I wonder how many females are going to lowkey try a couple of these lmao

[@PrettyP001]

I know right? 😂😂😂

[@up-uw4op]

I have tried the first 4. Still single

[@nopity3057]

@@up-uw4op I don't understand how you coped.

[@SHAWNTESH]

They better not😂😂😂

[@nopity3057]

@@SHAWNTESH … Whats that supposed to mean???

[@Wolfvonhinslik]

I remember one time my wife and daughter went out of town, so I took an afternoon and went to a local buffet alone. I just enjoyed a nice quiet meal, until this famly was like, "aww you dont have to eat alone, you can come eat with us" Cant a guy eat alone, damn....

[@Penelope416]

They just assumed you were lonely (which is annoying) but they meant well.

[@andrewbonafilia984]

That was a solid 20 minutes of non stop laughter for me. I thought I was gonna die at "Stoe away on a battleship"

[@ManaKayla]

In a positive light, they are all basically just saying “put yourself out there and meet people “ 🤷‍♀️

[@yogurLAPIZ]

No... They are saying change yourself and go out there to meet their standards.

[@Mr_Original]

@@yogurLAPIZ I gotta say either one of these seem to fit... 😂

[@yogurLAPIZ]

@@Mr_Original I don't call it put yourself there saying you are adopted if your parents are fat or adapting your likes to his so you have more opportunity to meet men. What is more funny is the end " if he has so many loose buttons don't marry him". Like after all that sh@ you better cause you don't have family anymore, your friends might hate you for now and any man who would stand someone with so low self steem is a killer or a bully. XD

[@Mr_Original]

@@yogurLAPIZ Touché... 🤣

[@nopity3057]

@@Mr_Original That doesn't sound like a very original conversation.

[@karenfrancis9692]

" practice your drinking " best one

[@aiden3627]

Karen Francis that just sounds like a good time to me hahaha

[@MaebyToday]

brb trying to turn a wolf into marriage material by telling him he has honor

[@Gabbie.xoxoxo]

How to find a husband in 2019: Drop hydro flask near him and say “And I oop- sksksksks”

[@TheCarnivoreSoprano]

Periodt!

[@rivergaming2393]

Uhhhh more or less how to remain single in 2019😂😂 or get teenagers rather than adults 😂😂

[@rose2654]

💀💀💀💀

[@kolrox73]

This is one of YOUR BEST VIDEOS! This list had me crying! 🤣😂 how to catch a serial killer should be the name of the article!

[@TheCarnivoreSoprano]

Lol

[@d199020081]

Also, just wanted to say that when Alonzo went to fly the purse "across the street", it was priceless cause he was like "look, this is what they want you to do, fly..." then I saw a blurry bag go up in the air right above him and an advertisement started playing lol

[@lynnbennett77]

Am in fits of laughter. Reading outdated article's can be hilarious as you have shown.

[@jenniferlawrence2988]

Seems like "how to be a creepy stalker " might be a better title for that article. 😳😄

[@mostar1219]

Wow, manufacturing r/nicegirls before they became memes

[@AJRome7]

Get out there with your lasso 😂😂 and convertible and evening gown 😂😂

[@d3l1ghts5]

Art Jeffery someone needs to draw this 🤣

[@MorgiieeShines]

If you're sick don't watch this. You're GUARANTEED to cough & laugh uncontrollably. This video IS funnier than the pregnant video.

[@eej1983able]

I cough and laugh when I'm not sick 😅

[@marcella9997]

I lost count of how many times I have watched this video. Too funny always cheers me up. Thank you for your videos 🥰🙋‍♀️

[@yaboileonard2866]

Bless you, my friend. Us fans have missed your glorious content.

[@booklovingpoet5942]

I love how he still over pronounces " AsKeD"

[@nailsarelife]

If he doesn't, you know he'll say axed lol!!

[@eliciaseward3930]

“eat alone by yourself” 😂💀

[@lovebubbles455]

How does he fall so perfectly and gracefully!?!?

[@kristennm18]

This explains some of the ridiculous things my grandma has said over the years 😂

[@No0nehøme17]

"Turn wolves into husband material" furries got took that to the extreme

[@queerlybelovdd]

more like how to attract a trifling manchild lmao

[@Louise-we9kf]

I DIED

[@imaniluvsu1]

💯

[@isabeldubarry2361]

the loose buttons thing at the end is someone who is seeing a lot of girls

[@djdesantis4568]

Isabel duBarry Oh man,bless your heart! I did NOT get that. I was gonna have to partake in some extra strength Ambien over that but that would just force me to sleep and then I’d dream about loose buttons all night!! It would have been a button dangling manhunt nightmare filled sewfest!!

[@aiden3627]

Isabel duBarry didn’t girls used to snap off the button of a guy they were seeing as a sort of trophy or was that just a fever dream I had?

[@costeele8879]

@@aiden3627 Honestly, I remember hearing something about that. You're probably right

[@laurahinrichsen3917]

There's also sewing humor because it was in McCall's, sewing puns.

[@trishcraft]

Those are the wolves. Loosen up those buttons babe lol.

[@stephanieclark1487]

I met my hubby on Plenty of Fish and showed my true self. I love nerdy things including video games! I also love to cook. So between video games, fun movies and good cooking he was hooked lol. Be yourself. That’s who they will get once married and it’s too much work to be fake.

[@Raven1303x]

How adorable was Kash, with just his little snoot sticking out from behind the chair 🥰 Xx

[@hannahcormier7053]

no one: alonzo: IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE BROKE

[@msdebbie-deb7383]

Laying in the ER watching you 👀 Waiting for the doctor to come in. I’m smiling so much they may think I’m faking. Although I don’t feel well Thanks you for keeping me company😊

[@GEPF777]

No one: Not a single pringle soul: Alonzo: alright, now, i might lose some subscribers...

[@PlanningWheNeva]

I’m dying with laughter lmao. Omg!! These are good ways to get kidnapped😂🤣

[@maggiesteadman1839]

I've been rewatching this like 20 times and it still makes me die laughing 🤣🤣

[@allygouin9797]

*Volunteer for Jury Duty* Me: I spent 6 years getting degrees in Politics and I will still rather stay single #andioop

[@lucylezcano8723]

Yayyy welcome back! You know no matter how long you're gone for we are here for you as well as your hilarious videos. We want to see you enjoying what you're doing ❤ much love and blessings to you and your loved ones.

[@brendacharron7436]

Fishing tackle: all the stuff in the "tackle box"; that fishermen bring fishing. Hooks, line, sinkers, plyers, etc.

[@eej1983able]

No crashing Alonzo. I'm a bit behind on your videos and making my days better 😌 we all need laughter

[@snowcaps2061]

dude alonzo i just gotta say man i love watching your video you always make me smile i hope you see this man