3 Things Men Can Do to Promote Gender Equity | Jimmie Briggs | TED

[@ryans.4715]

The toxicity in us? I don’t try to force my Opinion or views on people nor do I get offended if someone doesn’t agree with me. Also as a man we are always responsible. It may not be our fault. Or our problem. But it is always our responsibility.

[@free22]

He referred to toxicity in some forms of masculinity. Not in all forms. It is fine to say that this does not apply to you. It’s quite another to deny that some men engage in the acts against women listed in this video.

[@free22]

@@InMaTeofDeath Psychologists say toxic femininity occurs when you work for the benefit of others but to the detriment of oneself. There’s some good articles on the subject if you’re interested. As with toxic masculinity, in toxic femininity, you are looking at someone whose feminine traits (patience, passivity, etc) are harming themselves and others.

[@free22]

@@InMaTeofDeath Toxic femininity doesn’t have anything to do with feminism. Those are two different terms. Toxic femininity has to do with qualities that society considers to be feminine. Just as toxic masculinity has to do with qualities that society considers to be masculine.

[@persephonestardust2498]

Way to not listen. Not listening is an example of toxic masculinity.

[@lalaalal7847]

@@persephonestardust2498 "not appeasing to problems important to me makes you the perpetrator of the problem" Your thought process is problematic and the reason the problem is not taken seriously. You're the problem.

[@MopeyFand]

This falls into the same bucket of everything labelled "Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself". It doesn't matter if you're religious or not, one of the rules of the game is "Don't be a jerk to the other players". Just because we're all human doesn't mean we're the same. Men are better suited for physical work, women can get pregnant and may have to breastfeed. Ethnicities have different language and cultural boundaries and practices. Nationalities much the same with maybe laws being applicable too. The problem is that when people aren't the same, they view that difference as being less human, or more alien. Our institutions are generally bad at maintaining the concept of respect, and I think there are many disorders that make respect impossible to learn. Many leaders of the business world (where we spend most of our lives) are some of the worst people around, and we strive to model success in business in order to provide better lives for our children. Education is always the answer to every problem facing society.

[@VictoriaGrace97]

These comments are pretty intense. I think feminist thought has been lost in the verbiage of the chronically online for a while, and it’s a damn shame. The idea of “men - do better” can be really hard to respond to with an open mind when you feel blamed for a lot of problems that you don’t see a direct connection to, I guess. I honestly understand it. Here’s the thing… Men deserve equity when it comes to mental health advocacy, being taught how to communicate their emotions and in not being maligned by doing so, in their rights as an equally loving parent to their children, in their rights to their own physical autonomy against all types of abuse, and more visibility for the sexual abuse of men because it does happen. I think it might be an easier conversation to have if it were more clearly stated that the social ideals that cause this damage are the same ones that harm women. Standing up against “toxic masculinity” is also standing up for men. Are women harmed disproportionately in comparison? Yeah, but that doesn’t change the impact of any of these negatives on the individual. A man suffers just as much from an abuse he can’t speak up against for sake of his manhood as a woman does from an abuse she can’t speak up against without being forcibly silenced. It’s just a power differential. Everyone is harmed by a social order that doesn’t afford respect to the equal humanity of every person. Full stop. When a man stands up against misogyny he’s not self-hating but demonstrating morality, empathy for women, and promoting a BETTER LIFE FOR HIMSELF AS WELL.The level of conflict over this idea is unbelievably stupid.

[@persephonestardust2498]

Women's safety is more important than men's feelings.

[@VictoriaGrace97]

@@persephonestardust2498 I agree. As someone who has suffered at the hands of men my whole life, this is not a defense of men at the expense of my own safety. It’s an explanation of the nuance that gets lost when we spread reductive rhetoric. We leave gaps that allows MRA’s to weaponize the things I commented on as talking points against us, meanwhile feminist activists fight against the same things in the name of tearing down the patriarchal mindset that causes the problems to begin with.

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@VictoriaGrace97 I think men listening would be a big help.

[@VictoriaGrace97]

@@persephonestardust2498 It absolutely would.

[@outlaster3431]

The fact that you used black lives matter and claimed that a movement aimed at stopping racism in general as a point to say it only focuses on male issues doesn't make your point sound better

[@lalaalal7847]

They're gonna call you rightwing for that one.

[@outlaster3431]

@@lalaalal7847 how , this dude said they focused on police brutality because it was a male issue even thou women can face it too , and that it's an actual issue in general that also affects kid, this isn't even a right wing take

[@free22]

If you look at the number of male and female victims of police brutality, no one can deny that there is a larger number of male than female victims. He is correct in his statement.

[@outlaster3431]

@@free22 but the idea that they did it because its a male issue is stupid, it's not because it's a male issue , it's because racism as a whole is seen as something to stomp out no matter how small it is , let alone something that caused the loss of a life , it was not something that was fought for because it mainly affects black men , yet he frames it as that

[@free22]

@@outlaster3431 He is only pointing out that a group of women got together to address an issue that affects men a lot more than it affects women. In contrast, there aren’t many organizations out there led by men who address issues that affect women alot more than men.

[@rigu337]

A dude who founded something called the “Man Up” campaign is exactly the person you shouldn’t be listening to when it comes to gender.

[@ThePawcios]

What about promoting equality not equity? Focus more on skills than identities

[@persephonestardust2498]

I want to be equal to men. I want the same bodily autonomy, the same respect, the same protection. I want equality.

[@ThePawcios]

@@persephonestardust2498 and you want to say that you don't have it? Please correct me if I'm wrong...

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@ThePawcios can I jog outside topless in every state? Nope. So I don't have it do I? Also have you not seen the barrage of attacks on women's health in the news?

[@ThePawcios]

@@persephonestardust2498 Well to most of the danse pubs men connot enter wearing shorts while women can enter almost naked, do you want to change that as well? Really possibility to run with exposed breast is for you soo important? What do you mean by attacks on women's health in the news?

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@ThePawcios so your answer is basically "you SHOULD be unequal because I can't wear shorts in a private business"? Do I have that correct?

[@guilebarreto]

My ex was a feminist. But she refused to change the tire and to fix the roof saying that was a man's job. Lol

[@free22]

Your ex seems to have bought all the BS about gender roles, in spite of her feminism.

[@theskull9960]

Man i don't understand men's who talk about feminism that's a woman thing if something bad would happen to them sure but like this i find it weird

[@kanyustop]

wow its almost like you didnt listen to a word he said about more important issues like womens safety and lives and decided to focus on the most irrelevant detail imaginable

[@--Skip--]

The misogyny is stifling in the comments. You didn't listen, to you? Think, McFly, think!

[@--Skip--]

Did you show here how by working beside her? My father taught me how to change a tire but I never learned how to lay a roof.

[@vojtatomasek7697]

Hi, english is not my first language so please take this to consideration. I tried to find the word EQUITY, after I realised it doesn't mean the same thing as EQUALITY, which is also way easier for me to grasp - all people are treated equal. I found this article that explains EQUITY as "Giving all people shoes that fit them" as opposed to EQUALITY "giving everyone just shoes". I still can't seem to grasp it as the example feels weird (not important). Can someone give me an idea what EQUITY would look like in a case of something important? Like a job interview or a school acceptance?

[@persephonestardust2498]

Google image it.

[@vojtatomasek7697]

@@persephonestardust2498 Hi, thank you for that. Unfortunately it is the same problem. The examples are too simple, feels weird to jump into conclusion of something that feels this important based on a picture with people watching football and having a different height. Perhaps you have some exact pic in mind?

[@vojtatomasek7697]

@Mary Bean Hi, thank you for that. This is way better to grasp. Before this I would have said that the equitable example is equal (just because it makes complete sense and I did not know the word for it I guess) but you are making a good point. ty ❤️

[@ElizabethChronis]

Another example of equality would be school acceptances based entirely on SAT/ACT scores & grades. However, this doesn’t take into account that some people can afford to take test score improvement classes or can go to school full time, without having to work part time. The closest thing we have for equity in admissions is basing them on scores & personal statements & interviews (where you can display passion/enthusiasm/work ethic/motivation) … it’s not perfect equity & still has a lot of bias built in, but it does help make up for inequities of resources that you miss looking just at scores & grades.

[@vojtatomasek7697]

@@ElizabethChronis Hi, thank you for that example, I was wondering about it in this context. It seems nice but what comes to mind is that wouldn't this make a room for favouritism or something like that? You know, impression from an interview can be subjective. Just trying to think out loud.

[@KimchiKakashi]

A wise man once said "I yearn for true gender equality. I have no patience for..."

[@kieron88ward]

Opening line "The world can be a toxic place"; KZbin comments then prove point.

[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

bring back equitable water fountains

[@lalaalal7847]

Name 3 things women can do for gender equality? Or transgenders? Or non-binary? Or the transfluid? The list is endless, stop targeting your toxic activism at one group.

[@persephonestardust2498]

He's talking to the people sitting around and not helping. 🤣

[@lalaalal7847]

@@persephonestardust2498 helping a made-up problem? Go figure.

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@lalaalal7847 you're one of them. 🤣

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@absolutetruth3290 I hope you find self-esteem.

[@funkydanieluk]

Why is it my job to help other people? Are they helping me? I dont wish harm on anyone else, and I wouldn't cause them problems, but it isn't my job to make their lives better, especially when they wouldn't do the same for me. He keeps telling me how bad men are. Speak for yourself, buddy!

[@SimonesBlankCanvas]

ultimate respect for this guy!!

[@moolis]

We are continually indoctrinated by radical feminism that masculinity is bad. Without masculinity, men are not men - we become subservient doormats. If masculinity is toxic, what is good masculinity? The answer is there is just one. Masculinity is a innate driving force within men to accomplish and provision for our families and communities. We have been confused masculinity is associated to bad men doing bad deeds. We forget masculinity is also what saves us from other men. From saving people out of burning buildings. To save drowning dogs from a sweeping flood. Building new homes for new families. There is no such thing as toxic masculinity, there is just masculinity. To take away masculinity means to take away men from society.

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

Masculinity was never bad. "Toxic masculinity" is its own category. It involves societal ideologies on what a man should be, e.g. lacking emotion and never sharing feelings because it's seen as "gay" aka feminine. It pushes the idea that anything deemed feminine is weak and lesser than, leading to homophobia, higher male suicidal rates due to lack of expressing emotions, misogyny. It harms us all and feminism tries to abolish that by calling out those toxic ideologies.

[@AJX-2]

@@user-je4eh9ht1k those things are causes by insecurity and a lack of masculinity.

[@free22]

He never said that masculinity is bad. He said that some forms of masculinity are toxic. Those are two very different things.

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

@@free22 dude I think these ppl are a lost cause 😂

[@persephonestardust2498]

Have you tried listening?

[@lalaalal7847]

"men who commit acts of violence against women should be held accountable by formal means of justice" Apparently this guy is not aware that there's a justice system.

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

Which fails women on the daily.

[@lalaalal7847]

@@user-je4eh9ht1k and men too.

[@drsiigabb9935]

Women who commit acts of violence on men and children should get the same custodial sentences. False reports of rape, should have the accusers do the time of those accused plus the time they've already served

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

@@lalaalal7847 then why point out there's a legal system if you know it's useless? He said what he said because justice isn't being held.

[@lalaalal7847]

@@user-je4eh9ht1k Just because it has flaws, just like your thought process, doesn't mean that it is useless. Stop your binary thinking.

[@Bookdragon79]

It is great to see that a man is talking about this issue. Thank you

[@G.I.Jack69]

You’d love church then. Thousands of men at my church meet and talk about these exact issues, and so does the Bible

[@Tahycoon]

@@G.I.Jack69 tf?

[@G.I.Jack69]

@@Tahycoon probably didn’t know that, the church gets a bad rep

[@Tahycoon]

@@G.I.Jack69 no I mean, I was hoping the church is not another place that follows current trends such as political identity, transgenderism, feminism, and has their own opinions. I am disappointed that even the churches are following the trends for fear. I had a good rep for the church, not anymore now.

[@G.I.Jack69]

@@Tahycoon oh absolutely not. We do not support any of these trends. We do however see what is going on in our culture and see the world is broken and are fighting to do something about it. Many of these issues are contributed by abuse of fathers, fatherlessness, or just overall poor character in parents. We strive to become better people so that we can fix the problem at the source as we raise our children

[@lalaalal7847]

FYI, while men do commit majority of the violent crimes, they're also the majority victims of those crimes. Cherry picking specific violence that only affect women is just virtue signaling at this point.

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

But why though. What are the driving factors/societal influences in which make men violent? The expectation to be strong, hard, tough, stoic, king of the block. Not living up to this and feeling emasculated? Fight back, become aggressive, show them who's a "real man". These ideologies hurts both men and women. There's an interesting video of a man, I think he was behind bars in the past, visiting prisons and talking to inmates of these ideologies and all of them recognised it within themselves and saw how toxic they can be. I'll see if I can find it

[@persephonestardust2498]

So you're saying white men are the problem?

[@hungrymusicwolf]

@@user-je4eh9ht1k For one, it mostly isn't social factors. reason 1: You don't want to fight a physically stronger person, so women are less likely to fight simply because there are less people they'd want to fight. reason 2: Personality differences: Women are on average higher on agreeableness and neuroticism than men (big five personality model), people high on agreeableness tend to prefer to avoid conflict so that answers at least a part. These personality differences tend to get bigger in a culture the more equal men and women are. Neuroticism is about negative emotion, I don't know if that would make you less likely to want to fight but I can see an argument there. The ideologies you mention are mostly just abuse and have nothing to do with masculinity, most of it is counter to what most men aspire to be in the first place. In fact one of the main idea's of masculinity is being calm and rational so aggression is the exact opposite of that. The aggression only happens when a man with already existing anger issues "fails to live up to these expectations", but the reason for the aggression is the previous anger issues and failure was only the trigger, which if you know people with anger issues can be anything ranging from their power plug didn't go in the first time to feeling disappointed and depressed about themselves. Men having anger issues has much more to do with past abuse, poor parenting, and untreated issues like ADHD (which is known to cause anger management issues). Masculinity, the aspiration to be rational, calm, and stoic, is the answer to these problems not the reason for them. These social standards have been developed over thousands of years to ensure that men are of most use to society, they're quite literally designed to minimize violence and remaining in control of your emotions and impulses. The people living for the past 2000 years weren't all dumb fools that continued to make problems worse without ever making it better, they knew what they were doing after thousands of years of collective experience. Inmates are an example of people who were WITHOUT masculinity, you can see this in the statistics of boys raised by single mothers as their crime rates are significantly higher. The fathers, and by extension the masculine role model, is the reason why guys AREN'T violent, toxic masculinity is literally the absence of masculinity or the presence of abuse and/or other underlying social issues that have nothing to do with it.

[@lalaalal7847]

@@persephonestardust2498 So you're saying that toxic masculinity is good?

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@hungrymusicwolf so guys with 💩 fathers are more violent? And you don't think it's a masculinity problem? Women have all of those problems too, but we're not shooting up schools.

[@user-wp8yx]

What were the three points? I missed it.

[@christinefournier685]

1- tell the truth 2- be consistent 3- speak up

[@user-wp8yx]

@@christinefournier685 thank you so much. I actually listened to it twice and missed it.

[@G.I.Jack69]

@@christinefournier685 third point was accountability. Not speak up

[@kevinursuchadisease]

I think it’s a disservice to men to talk about inherent male toxicity and I think it’s a disservice to both men and women to imply that women and men are the same. We are not the same.

[@persephonestardust2498]

What you can't handle one little disservice? Women handle it every day.

[@lalaalal7847]

@@persephonestardust2498 you're not a victim. Woman up.

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@lalaalal7847 non sequitur.

[@kevinursuchadisease]

@@persephonestardust2498 I’ll accept that men are inherently toxic if you accept that women are inherently bitchy or whiny. No? Why? Because you’d be stupid to accept such a ridiculous premise? I don’t accept it. There’s a way to praise women and raise women up without degrading men. If you’re incapable of doing so, then you’re not worth either of those things.

[@rhoynedev]

@@kevinursuchadisease if you feel like anything in this video is degrading to men then it greatly explains the reason this video is needed

[@lalaalal7847]

"silence against misogyny is complicity" I wonder if he would keep the same energy if it were about misandry. Probabily not, because "patriarchy" and "men are always at power".

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

Misandry has 0 real world consequences. It is merely verbal venting about the mistreatment presented by men. Consequences of misogyny, however, result in women getting abused and killed. Don't be so ignorant.

[@lalaalal7847]

@@user-je4eh9ht1k The fact that you're justifying misandry is beyond idiotic. Hatred always results into violence so unless you SUPPORT violence, you SHOULDN'T justify it. And FYI, it does have negative effects, it doesn't have to be the exact same effect as misogyny to be a problem. Your thought process is problematic, be better.

[@simsim4910]

According to studies from the UK half of domestic violence is carried out against men. In Germany one third confirmed but the real number is likely to be higher. Violence against men is not in any way unconsequencial and often far less visable as the abuse is more often psychological. It is ablsolutly stupid to try and justify or talk down violence against a certain group, it is just infighting and the effort could be used to actually do something instead of shifting blame.

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

@@lalaalal7847 if you and your brothers were disproportionately harassed, abused and murdered, you'd probably end up venting to. If you think VENTING is the problem and not the real world abuse and murder, you are the problem.

[@free22]

@@simsim4910 Yes, but if you look at violence against men, it is men who are more likely to commit that violence. Women are more likely to be the victim of violence at the hands of men.

[@squillen]

I'm not sure I agree with this person on much of anything and it really seems like they have an entirely different view of the world than I do. I think there's a good chance a lot of what they say is motivated by bitterness, insecurity, and hate, but at the end of the day, I'm glad TED is hosting them and allowing them a platform. This is a damn cool space on the internet, from which I've received some pretty life-changing advice on occasion. Edit, just heard this: "It's damn annoying when someone you don't like says something you don't like. That is the sign of a healthy, functioning free-speech situation" - Elon Musk, during an interview literally on this channel. Keep it up TED.

[@bradley6348]

I was concerned as to how someone could be confused as to what this person was trying to convey, until you pulled out an Elon Musk quote of all people. Find God.

[@Brittany-l8v8o]

What message is the speaker trying to convey and how do they convey it? What are some of the important points that they make?

[@bigjohn8407]

They can stand up for themselves.

[@persephonestardust2498]

Then don't complain "not aLl m3n".

[@jered1282]

I genuinely don’t understand how anyone can listen to this and think this is a productive ideology.. the further down this path we’ve gone, the worse the mental health of women (and our entire country for that matter) has gotten. Our youth are the ones most negatively affected by this thinking. I don’t understand what the goal is here?

[@LegendLength]

commies aren't known for their great plans

[@Kokosnuss]

This is such a delicate topic, one missstep and people will jump on you from all sides. I was a little on the fence with the sentence "men are not endangered" as this statement is not true. BUT I agree with practially everything else the man said. It's important to raise our children and be a better human and learn from the mistakes of our predecessors. Those in power will stay in power with their air poluting bullshit until they die, so it's important for the next generations to be smarter... it's up to us to make this happen now. Just a little more respectfulness towards everyone would change the world drastically.

[@malcom246]

Definitely lost me when he said we are not under attack. A lot of these issue have no reason to be divided by gender. SA happens to both men and women by men and women. The conversation always needs to be a unified one. How can WE protect each other. Stop with the gender bullshit. We need to be together. The wage gap will close with the work gap closes. Men will care more about SA victims when everyone start caring when it happens to us. We all face issues that we all won’t be able to fully understand, and that why acting like what is inbetween your legs has anything to do with compassion, with empathy, with a willingness to hear people who are suffering and want to make a change. This is not a battle of men and women, this is a battle between US and those in the ruling class with power and influence. In medicine there is more money in the treatment then there is the cure, in politics there is more money in the argument then there is the solution.

[@persephonestardust2498]

What about all the male violence?

[@malcom246]

@@persephonestardust2498 are women not violent? Are they incapable of violence ? What’s your argument. People are violent men women kids ?? It’s not an exclusive issue

[@froffsta]

Keep going to work. So, woman can feel important in the workplace. That's the most important thing.

[@free22]

Or maybe just so women can be taken seriously at workplaces around the world. That is no always the case.

[@youvegotmysong]

Based

[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

bring back equitable water fountains

[@jonahsingh5645]

This comment section yikes.

[@persephonestardust2498]

Affirming every word he's saying.

[@lalaalal7847]

She's not gonna pick you, bro

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

I'd pick you 😉

[@skixd88]

Three things men can do to promote gender equity. #1 Do not compete against women in sports.

[@theskull9960]

So true

[@prosenjeetsarker5262]

I had to like Ted,s talk

[@robloxmax2694]

I’ve never seen such a mature man especially at that age. Huge respect, that’s the kind of men women deserve, I’d feel so safe with him

[@suchalameo]

"how many men should've been there" - the idea that men weren't there due to how society shapes men disenfranchises the idea that your opinion is an opinion.

[@thebigdawgj]

Giving certain people equal rights was a mistake.

[@halcyon.89]

If women gets ahead of men, will we still narrow gender wealth gap?

[@persephonestardust2498]

Ahead how? 47 female presidents in a row?

[@mynameisjeff9124]

@@persephonestardust2498 Because gender equality is determined by the number of female presidents

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@mynameisjeff9124 it is!

[@mynameisjeff9124]

@@persephonestardust2498 No.

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@mynameisjeff9124 do some research. Political equality is on the agenda.

[@jhg699]

classic woke trash example. The war on men will backlash. Not on women but to all those who defend this madness

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[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

bring back equitable water fountains

[@MrBowling35]

Very good video on how men can promote gender equality

[@ElijahPerrin80]

Or just allow the pendulum to swing hoping it runs out of steam some generation.

[@persephonestardust2498]

I'm totally down for 46 female presidents in a row!

[@NanoGix]

Porque le quitan los likes? Acaso el vídeo y TED no defienden la libertad de expresión en ideas y opiniones? Así como plantean crecimiento y desarrollo

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

It seems that some commenters can't take criticism without being defensive. Put the guard down and LISTEN to what's being said

[@lalaalal7847]

Could say the same for you. Put the guard down and LISTEN to what is said in those comments rather than outright labelling them as defensive. Hypocrite.

[@persephonestardust2498]

They can't! They know how guilty they are and nothing undoes their past!

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@InMaTeofDeath sshh. Shh. Stop trying to change the subject and just listen.

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

@@InMaTeofDeath Sure, there's definitely toxic feminity too. So if we look at what society deems feminine first, is someone that is typically dainty, gentle, small, pretty. Again nothing inherently wrong, as with masculine attributes, but it becomes toxic when it is hyperaccentuated and we put limitations on ourselves and others on how we act. Toxic feminity would show itself as women making themselves small and shaming other women for not acting small i.e. "that's not lady-like", "you're being bossy", "too loud". If we pick apart at what "lady like" is, we actually see that attributes are actually along the lines of being dependent, quiet and obedient, and even accepting abuse in order to not cause ripples. The pressure to be empathetic and selfless can also place burden on women by putting her needs last. It not only affects the way women act, but i believe it trickles into the way we look too. We need to be short, petite, delicate, etc. Women for centuries have contorted their bodies to replicate what's "feminine". Truth is, we all need a balance of both masculine and feminine. We both need to be leaders and carers. Tbh, labeling any human attribute into strict categories is dumb imo 🤷‍♀️ just aim to be a good, well rounded human being.

[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

bring back equitable water fountains

[@finesse1125]

By your logic, if men see themselves as above women, are mtf actively choosing to be lesser people? Why would they do that? And does toxic masculinity still exist in mtf people?

[@persephonestardust2498]

You're new aren't you?

[@grahamvandernaalt3126]

they dont choose...

[@thexcoreissilent]

the whining from the men in the comments...knew it was going to be there and looked anyway..

[@mynameisjeff9124]

because he's talking bs. There's no more inherent toxicity in men, than there is in women. There is no toxic masculinity nor toxic femininity. There are only toxic people.

[@thisisntallowed9560]

It's crazy when you look at the comments how much men want to be talked about but refuse to even consider what women say about their experience. It's exactly what this guy says, men have done nothing to hold themselves accountable for a history of oppression yet they expect women to come and save them and give them attention while playing victim.

[@persephonestardust2498]

It's like watching the nature channel sometimes.

[@queenlover2163]

experiences? what experiences? yes. there was a history of oppression of women and even women were not considered citizens equivalent to men. it's true. But time has changed. the men who oppressed women had died long ago and men who are your neighbor are not the same guys who oppressed women in the long human history. Also "modern men" believe women and men are equal, they have no differences in potential. Then why do radical feminists such as you want to criticize "modern men" and hold them accountable for a history of oppression? if someone holds you accountable for things stolen by your ancestors who lived more than 200 years ago and asks to compensate the price, then, will you pay for it? I think it maybe not.

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@queenlover2163 way to not listen about our experiences, hence proving the point.

[@thisisntallowed9560]

@@queenlover2163 If I tell you what experience I went through you will gaslight me instead of believing women in general when they say they experience sexism. You will tell me that didn't happen, and if it did, it wasn't that bad, and if it was, that's not a big deal. And if it is, that's not men's fault. And if it was, they didn't mean it. And if they did, women deserved it. So it's not worth talking to you, because I've talked to men like you in the past and that's what they all said.

[@Alwyn_Nito]

unrelated; do fisheries turn fish byproduct/"waste" into fertilizer instead of just dumping it???

[@achinthamihiranga5877]

❤🤙

[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

bring back equitable water fountains

[@energy538]

...yeesh, this comment section is kind of something. My personal belief? Humanity as a whole is kind of messed up. Everyone, regardless of gender, has the potential to be hurtful. Does this mean one group or another deserves to be spoken over? No. Do some men do terrible things? Yes. Do some women? Yes. Does this mean both men and women are inherently evil? No. Nobody's born a mugger. (Hopefully, anyways.) I'd honestly like to just not pick a side without people scolding me for inaction. I'm young, and I'd really like to grow up some more before I dip my toe into the mess that is society.

[@Sven_x]

Wtf is this garbage that TED has become

[@MasterTuttoo]

Idgaf man I just want to work

[@IonicSarge]

“There can be no reckoning, without accountability” repeated twice for emphasis and to appear nuanced and wise. It was absolutely ridiculous and just some streamed together nothingness. No substance, no wisdom absolutely nothing of value in those sentences. This entire video is just a virtue signaling, moral circle jerk. There was no substance, no insight, no discussion it was all just blame. Designed to pander and hold peoples hands who are too afraid to see the real world. It’s for people who are afraid to call out bullshit when they see it because they don’t want to be labeled a “misogynist” instead they want to sit in their protective little bubbles and be told they’re a good person because they let people walk all over them.

[@macadamia668]

Lol imagine protesting Bill Gates from doing a ted talk. Let alone pricing $5000 per seat. Truly oligarchy times.

[@series298]

wow. what a bunch of absolute nonsense.

[@melaniatrump2166]

Heres 4th one: they can avoid singling out men as the ones who need to do things to promote gender equity

[@persephonestardust2498]

🤣🤣🤣

[@kaaoskaiser2627]

I'd expect something like that on Tedx. Damn

[@jacoflez3160]

Dislike

[@ninkeyblader]

I love the idea of having of having more nuanced conversations about gender and sexuality! I hope we can see more interesting discusssions like this! Wish this video went into more detail on the history of gender inequality. And how homophobia is so rooted in things like toxic masculinity in traditional gender roles! For its length I think it summarized things nicely! Now we just need more

[@lalaalal7847]

I would argue that homophobia roots from abrahamic religions which have an incredible influence on western culture. Those same "morals" are then reinforced by ignorant parents, resulting in both sexes displaying homophobic behavior in their respective, stereotypical way; violence for males and mentally for females. To blame just "toxic" masculinity doesn't solve anything, it just shifts the blame and wastes all opportunity we as a society can use to solve or at least reduce it from happening.

[@ninkeyblader]

@@lalaalal7847 I imagine toxic masculinity can have many origins. Certainly perpetuated by religions, however those interpretations and teachings were transcribed by the men in power at the time. Mindsets that certainly influence how certain practices are performed, including anything that could subjugate a now protected group. Honestly though we’d have to do a deep dive on world history and sociology to find the true root to homophobia, toxic masculinity, and misogyny.

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@ninkeyblader toxic masculinity goes back to caveman days. Now we're evolving, well, some of us are.

[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

bring back equitable water fountains

[@G.I.Jack69]

@@ninkeyblader it’s sad that you blame religion for homophobia and sexism. You’re probably right. What’s sad though is that Jesus and the Bible were the most progressive things by far for their time. The Old Testament is literally structured to guide people to mend injustices people have created. Jesus’s reputation was being friends with and caring for prostitutes and outcasts of society

[@xXBossManStatusXx]

Men

[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

bring back equitable water fountains

[@miola2083]

Awesome, Jimmie!

[@mynameisjeff9124]

Equity = Communism; and we know how well this went... Equality on the other hand is great. Everyone should have the same starting ground and rules, but equity is literally the opposite. Today, I don't see how women are any more mistreated in the workplace and society than men are. All I hear is self-victimization by people who don't want to work and think they're entitled to anything and everything. You talk about male privilege, but yet women or rather radical feminists want more privileges, while still keeping their current ones.

[@kiran-thetributechannel]

The world needs more people like you sir ! Especially with your name lol But what you said is totally right and people should know the difference between equity and equality. What feminists want is equity (giving weak people more because they are weak). But we should start acknowledging both women's issue and men's issue and solve them equally.

[@persephonestardust2498]

Of course you don't see it. You're not living it, and won't listen to those who are.

[@ClockworkAvatar]

@@persephonestardust2498 let me ask you a question. you have two people running a race, one is a naturally gifted runner, the other is not. what rules do you put in place for this race?

[@mynameisjeff9124]

@@persephonestardust2498 How tf do you know what I am living? Stop victimizing yourself for God's sake

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@mynameisjeff9124 you're cis male aren't you?

[@lalaalal7847]

The femcels have found the video!

[@serendipitytwo777]

Thank u

[@damnsurfer522]

Citizens making choices about their society are asked to make them from an "original position" of equality (left) behind a "veil of ignorance" (wall, center), without knowing what gender, race, abilities, tastes, wealth, or position in society they will have (right). You failed at the opening of your speech but citing your social scorecard.

[@earlwynncasanas4890]

Yessss

[@StephenPaulTroup]

Didn't watch, have no interest. I strongly suspect this is not a teaching video, but rather a sermon from the religion of 'Females must be believed / Males are toxic' regardless of what it is being called this time around. I treat all people with respect, I judge them on merit, not gender or race and I expect the same.

[@wing4638]

erm i think you should watch it before comment on it, the thing you said is somehow similar to his conclusions

[@StephenPaulTroup]

@@wing4638 After reading your comment I decided to listen to a bit of this man, I randomly chose 6:15 where he starts berating men for not supporting 'reproductive rights', aka murdering innocent babies. This isn't teaching, this is ideology, and a bloody murderous one at that. This man and I are not on the same page, we are not in the same book.

[@wing4638]

@@StephenPaulTroup ok maybe i misunderstood your words, cause i felt like he raised up an idea of female should be protected more by males cause females are more physically weak and having an unreasonably and unacceptably lower position than their husbands in families , i don’t think he is trying to berate men, just his point is that in order to reach equal in this society men have to do a bit more cause it is difficult for two genders r undeniably different in body structures and some other sort of things XD

[@MandaB28]

Important talk. I just came here to the comments to read the usual, “not all mennnnnn” responses from the actually toxic men. They can’t help but out themselves 😆

[@jakeldez558]

All while ignoring the plank in your own eye. What a conversation starter lmao.

[@MandaB28]

@@jakeldez558 thanks for outing yourself 😆 this should really be an option on dating apps so us ladies can avoid the low key misogynists

[@persephonestardust2498]

They might as well be saying "he means me!" 🤣

[@jakeldez558]

@@MandaB28 If dating apps are that vital to your intimate life, then yeah.. I’d be willing to assume it’d be a great tool for you to have. Best wishes. 🤙🏽

[@thisisntallowed9560]

It's crazy how everytime humans do something bad as a group to another group, the group once they realize they've been doing bad they still never take accountability.

[@Sparks00psn]

Ok groomer

[@rattratt12]

He should have gone a step further. Who are raising these boys who become men with these core beliefs? Where is the female role model in their lives that is teaching that son from the time he is born and before he is exposed to the world to respect women. So I wish he had gone into that a little more.

[@clivesmith9377]

Stop talking like all men causing a problem. You might be toxic inside but I'm not so STOP BLAMING ME.

[@persephonestardust2498]

Stop making it about your hurt feelings.

[@wakefoot]

So sick of you people.

[@persephonestardust2498]

The first thing men have to do is shut up and listen. But they're so used to doing the telling, they don't know how.

[@b_radfrmbu7246]

Lol who hurt you?

[@kevinursuchadisease]

No one listens to people who tell them to “shut up and listen.” Be worth listening to, and people will listen.

[@thisisntallowed9560]

@@b_radfrmbu7246 men?

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@kevinursuchadisease men have a listening problem and you just proved it.

[@kevinursuchadisease]

@@persephonestardust2498 women have a talking problem, and you just proved it.

[@persephonestardust2498]

LOL so many guilty men in the comments exposing themselves.

[@kevinursuchadisease]

Guilty of what? You’re totally fine with completely degrading men in order to advance yourself, yet men who push back are the guilty ones? That’s pathetic.

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@kevinursuchadisease when you are used to privilege, equality can feel like oppression.

[@kevinursuchadisease]

That’s a cute saying. If you can say that men should just accept the fact that we are all inherently toxic, then you have don’t understand what privilege is. I grew up in a poor home, went into 6 figures of debt to get a graduate degree given to me by a female program director, and I’m married to a very successful woman both personally and professionally. Much of my life has been impacted by incredible women, and none of them act the way you do.

[@dougdimmadoodahdaay7887]

you can go and drink from your special water fountain at the front of the bus hun, nobody is stopping you

[@persephonestardust2498]

@@twuandixon8675 you said rape, not me. Is that a confession?

[@ellie698]

Gender equity? Or the equality between the TWO biological sexes? Which is it?

[@Bart-dg6qv]

Americans, always extreme. From one side of the wall to the other side. Like a drunk on a ship in violentl storm. Can't you just be in the middle of every problem?

[@persephonestardust2498]

Really? Being neutral in the face of injustice? Ha! No.

[@bloodcarnage8285]

how can women create more gender equity for men by providing govt funded wombs

[@alestevez950]

It’s interesting to see such a progressive platform such as TED with an overwhelmingly conservative viewer base, lol. How does this happen? I love watching the conservatives get mad tho 😝

[@lalaalal7847]

Drop the tribalistic attitude, it's hurting any real change.

[@user-je4eh9ht1k]

@@lalaalal7847 you're one of them 😂

[@alestevez950]

@@twuandixon8675 you think you did something there, don’t you?

[@alestevez950]

@@twuandixon8675 if you think speaking for gender equality is “biased” then you’re a conservative. You’re either for equality/equity or you’re not.

[@persephonestardust2498]

It is fun!

[@elfeo069]

Say wot?

[@FractalPrism.]

equality and equity are nonsense. its nice to be kind and giving, but your categories dont entitle you to anything want something? go earn it like everyone else.

[@persephonestardust2498]

What about all the unearned privilege some enjoy over others?

[@earlwynncasanas4890]

✨

[@playgroundofsound7683]

😂😂