30 Lessons about life with a chronic illness... [CC]

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[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Some facts about BetterHelp: All the Counselors on BetterHelp, with no exceptions, are licensed, trained, experienced, and accredited psychologists (PhD / PsyD), marriage and family therapists (LMFT), clinical social workers (LCSW / LMSW), or licensed professional counselors (LPC). BetterHelp has a very lenient refund policy which provides 100% money-back to any member who was not satisfied for any reason. Why did BetterHelp get the negative attention on KZbin? In late September BetterHelp ramped up its influencer marketing initiatives towards World Mental Health Day (10/10). Within a few weeks, it sponsored many high-profile influencers. BetterHelp became a “trending” topic on KZbin and it incentivised many creators to follow up on the content to grab views. Several mainstream media outlets picked interest at the topic following the controversy at KZbin but after doing their own fact-checking they all came to the conclusion there is no merit to any of the allegations and they all dropped the story. More reading: medium.com/@alonmatas/when-betterhelp-found-itself-in-a-youtube-controversy-3fd472229a4e medium.com/@alonmatas/making-betterhelp-better-with-better-terms-and-conditions-8f542e82e735

[@hattieboomboom6710]

Jessica Kellgren-Fozard I love u and I’m vintage too just like u...ur my role model!!! ❤️❤️

[@bionicalman1721]

Betterhelp said I'd be better with a physical counselor which I have

[@em-agan]

Thanks for this, as a queer 20 year old girl trying to figure out all her diagnoses I really connect with your content! I’ve just got a cane and I’m working on trying to accept my limits and take care of myself. Your positivity and advice is so beneficial for disabled people, especially those who are new to being disabled or younger disabled people. Thanks for being so awesome, I would love some more disability videos :)

[@arisymphony]

BetterHelp is really expensive, doesn't take health insurance, and refuses to refund for their crappy therapists. That said, the second best and the most helpful therapist I ever had was on BetterHelp.

[@ielish5536]

Thank you for these answers!!

[@hannahwitton]

"mindfulness does not reduce pain - JOG ON". Absolutely iconic.

[@ceaselessslayer]

There are probably some very confused americans right now, wondering about this strange slang! Love ya Hannah x

[@DahliaLegacy]

I agree if anything I want to be less mindful, less aware of my body. ^_^ I'll take that option. I don't need my body to keep telling me life sucks, I know it does, let's watch something funny on tv. >.>

[@DahliaLegacy]

Jennifer Vance- this is why writing saves me, it lets me be anywhere but here, it's much better living lives where you aren't hurting.

[@NyoomMonster]

I'm going to tell my mom this next time she tries to tell me that, because I know I have something, I should be able to control it. I.e. paranoia. Since I know I have paranoia I should now be able to control it by knowing what makes sense. Just think through it logically! Great, now I have a detailed idea of how a terrible thing could be happening right now.

[@emilyb5557]

I did find the Breathworks Mindfulness for pain course really helped, not to reduce it. But to not fight it or physically tense against it and to accept limitations etc. But it's v carefully developed by someone (Vidyamala Burch) with lived experience of chronic severe pain. I love too that VB still openly talks about bad days, her own struggling and severe pain, she gets up regularly in sessions to move her body etc so no one feels if they aren't magically cured and feeling "better" they fail. There's a video interview of VB with RicK Hanson where she talks about mindfulness in severe pain I'll try to find. I think a lot of ppl me incl got VERY put off by standard mindfulness that just was making us feel/be aware of pain more, uh not good, not helpful.

[@doddleoddle]

WHATEVER I HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT AND COME BACK

[@lissiehickman42]

YES WE LOVE LEGENDS SUPPORTING LEGENDS

[@sunflowerthebunbunbunny]

doddleoddle - um...hi?

[@sukisocks]

Hey you two should do a collab one day xx

[@mirimeerkat2087]

Oh my god my gay crush watches my other gay crush's videos!!!

[@edie555]

awwwwwwwwwwwwwww dodie how amazing is jessica???

[@georgerobins4110]

“You are allowed to love the you today even if you want tomorrow’s you to be different” WHAT A GOOD QUOTE OH MY GOD???

[@katienewton3404]

“Keeping life chronically interesting” should be the slogan for this channel

[@emilyb5557]

T-shirt??

[@arsenalo14]

“You don’t look sick” UGH YES big autoimmune disease struggle!! Glad some people understand this!

[@MKMonsterr]

And then that sometimes carries into "You don't look sick so I'm going to tell you how my temporary condition is harder than your forever condition."

[@mitzypinks1338]

Chronic pancreatitis struggle too! Them: “Oh but you look fine! “ Me: “you can’t see my pancreas”.

[@dawnrosewallflower508]

I want a T-Shirt saying "I'm NOT pregnant. I'm on a shit load of Steroids!".

[@pazzieanneknexx809]

I asked my parents once to print my colonoscopy and endoscopy picture results when I was really sick so when people said something to that effect I could deadpan and show them a picture. And probably also sarcastically throw confetti at them.

[@elainaknibb6809]

Chronic migraine struggle 😒

[@McKenzzii]

"mindfulness will not reduce pain. JOG ON" i need this on a t-shirt stat

[@shawnahava133]

McKenzzii but really let’s get a shirt. Obsessed with this comment.

[@grey_roses]

This definitely needs to be in her shop. All of the things. Totes, throw pillows, socks, all of it. 😃

[@elizabethross6895]

YESSSSSSS!

[@C_Beaty]

Yes I definitely need that t-shirt!

[@calliechristiansen9607]

Yes!

[@TheRealMythril]

YAY I’m sick of doctors insisting mindfulness can stop chronic pain. It can help distract from the lower levels a little as a coping mechanism, but is useless when you are at the stage you are begging your SO to use a heavy object to knock you unconscious!

[@sbreckon1050]

Amen. I use mindfulness for a bit, and then I go get a big pain shot.

[@Bastonikov]

Every time Jessica says "hello lovely people" i always answer "hello lovely person!" in my head

[@Kjata316]

Bastonikov Istah SAME!!! 😂

[@NanaAshley]

#same

[@karolinag1073]

#same

[@wynn6240]

I am absolutely loving the rising levels of sass on this channel. Yas Jessica **clicks**

[@sonipitts]

OMG yes. Jessica has absolutely started showing additional signs of chronic sass, and it seems to be progressive. I am so here for it.

[@K.Kitbex]

@@sonipitts Hah! Chronic humour at its best ;-) Here for it.

[@morganday6280]

# 21 MINDFULNESS DOES NOT REDUCE PAIN!!!!!! Please tell everyone! It does help with anxiety, but not pain!

[@reneerials2389]

My Boyfriend with EDS wanted to mention just how much he FELT that dislocated rib comment.

[@minimalzebra]

Renee Rials my ribs dislocate regularly fellow EDS person here

[@MrsInAbox]

Hello! Fellow Zebra, current rib issues!

[@FaithOriginalisme]

fellow EDS person here, thank god I don't dislocate joints, I just have constant lower end pain in most of my tendons

[@klancethememe2432]

fellow EDS person!my shoulder regularly dislocates so thats a blast

[@mabcmom]

EDSer here too. Starting PT for 2 ribs on my left side that keep subluxing. It's exhausting.

[@centromeda]

"you will spend a lot of energy helping people cope with the emotions they have other your illness. eventually you will stop telling people you're ill." YES. THIS. i have been struggling SO HARD with the reactions i get from people when i tell them i'm sick. when they baby me, and they pity me, and act like it's awful and that they need to react with such HUGE amounts of "awww poor jason!!" like, um... no? why is it suddenly different now that you know that i'm ill? i am not YOUR sob story and i am NOT your baby dolly to play mother with.

[@leoneabbacchio2098]

ayyy agree

[@mulliganstew72]

I used to care about their emotions, until it became obvious the sentiment wasn't returned. Now I just say “send money”.

[@victoriatube159]

Yah my gf has POTS and when someone starts babying her I tell them "thats my job and I'm not caring for her right now so she dosent need care so you dont need to treat her like she's your puppy and not an adult who knows how to handle thier own issues weather that means handling them herself or bringing someone she knows who she is who can do the handling for her. We joke I'm her emotional support human becuase i can tell when she's not doing well before she can. Others can't see it becuase thier not around her as much and it's not something you can exactly teach so I can get her to a chair before she passes out.

[@victoriatube159]

@hello the problem is they stop treating them like an adult who can handle themselves the best response is "ok, do I need to know anything for incase you have an incident" or, "thanks for letting me know I'll keep that in mind" While a lot of people go "Oh you poor baby" then go doting on them like thier incapable toddlers. As a chronically ill purson dating a more disabled person (who can't hide it as much) I hate when people treat her that way it makes her feel small and insignificant and in the way and it so frustrating when people flip the script from treating them like thier an adult to doting on her like she's incapable yah it's better then the bitch who dosent believe her and pulls her out of a disabled sear to prove thier point but it's still not treating them like thier normal being othered weather positively or negatively done still hurts. Mines commen enough that people don't do this othering shit as much

[@rochellethundercloud346]

I agree

[@marystestkitchen]

Your hair looks amazing

[@Aelffwynn]

Janet disliked this video because Jessica missed her party.

[@MarinaMemaJMB]

Let's be honest if Jessica missed my party I would be devastated. She is awesome.

[@Azlantheforestgremlin]

Okay so! I have been a huge fan of yours for years but since recently being diagnosed with a list of things (it is always a list, isn't it.. goodness) "wrong with me" at the age of 20 when literally all I want to do is survive university, I have become rather... it's been lot. However, your videos have literally been giving me the motivation to at least try to get out of bed in the morning because you make me feel valid and seen, and the scary impossible things seem slightly less scary and impossible. So thank you for your content, and I appreciate you

[@AerinsChair]

As someone who has been more depressed and down about my chronic illness and disabilities lately, I am very glad you made this video. It was what I needed to hear today, and it is painfully accurate.

[@randomquest11]

I'm so happy you covered the real lives of the chronically ill, I find a vast majority of people simply cannot understand what life is truly like! Thankyou! ☺️

[@Panteracide]

It's amazing how much overlap I got from this with Chronic *Mental* Illness - I often go through horrible periods of guilt because people can't see what's wrong with me and I'm able-bodied (aside from mild scoliosis), but still have so many symptoms. It helps a lot to be seen, even periferally. Thanks, lovely.

[@Andresfin]

Finally getting into the genetics doctor because a other fun thing about living with a chronic Illness is trying to get a diagnosis!!!!

[@Flareontoast]

Big mood. Best of luck!!

[@sonipitts]

That chronic state of being undiagnosed is the worst. I'm halfway there. At least my docs recognize and accept that I'm on the hypermobility spectrum somewhere. And now, after checking it out, I'm 90% convinced I meet the new 2017 hEDS criteria, but I've got to figure out how to make that happen (not sure if a GP can administer that or not). Or where the $$$ will come from to do it. ~~glares angrily in American~~

[@thedreaming989]

@@sonipitts Yes, hypermobility is so irritating, so many Docs don't even know what a Beighton score is. If you dont have classical eds type 1 with stretchy skin they are so confused.

[@buriburi4087]

Good luck! I'm on a similar path. Appointment in March - never have I been so excited to hear that some test was positive and I can now get a referral 🤣

[@triliheart333]

I understand this. I've had doctors treating my symptoms for 15 years because enough proof exists that something is wrong with me but it seems like the doctors don't care about an official diagnosis because we know some of the things it causes but I would like to be proactive and not just reactive about whatever my condition is.

[@AllisonEinolf]

I love that phrase "You can love today's you even if you want tomorrow's you to be different!" I feel like that's the perfect way to describe how I try to feel about myself.

[@Bethydawn]

I don't have a chronic illness, but I do have mental illness as does my sister. I can absolutely say I can attest to the 'you'll be managing other people's emotions'. I'm more often than not caught between wanting to share what I'm going through with friends and family because it's HARD to do it myself, and then... the regret immediately after when they ask what they did wrong to make me like this or... them being worried about my future and how are they supposed to deal with this. BUT when I keep things to myself... they're upset I didn't' share. Awful vicious cycle XD

[@ladyredl3210]

I suffer from a panic disorder, as well as physical things, and it's just as hard.

[@mislovelover31]

"You are allowed to love the you of today even if you want tomorrow's you to be different" I love this so much, i wish i could truly believe it. Thank you Jessica ❤️

[@sandydrewserrano4855]

“Think happy thoughts and pray” are the ones I get all the time with my depression and anxiety. Ummm, please don’t say those things to me. Having depression is not a switch I can turn off and on by think happy thoughts and praying.

[@kelviannaepperson3677]

Having faith and hope only helps with my anxiety and keeping me from freaking out but doesn't help with my depression

[@user-hk3ux8yg1p]

Dayum I'm an agnostic..

[@SuperPooped]

Sassy Jessica is my favourite Jessica.

[@HomeBirdJen]

WOW. I CANNOT LIKE THIS VIDEO HARD ENOUGH! I identified with every. Single. Point! Especially finding out who your real friends are! Thank you Jessica, your hair is ON POINT 👌👍💜☺️

[@KyleReese96]

Your top/dress is so beautiful!!! please share details!!! 💜💜💜 p.s. your hair is always so lovely 😊

[@Aelffwynn]

Yes!! I scrolled down to see if she would tell us where she got it! And she looks amazing. Her hair is even shinier than usual, too. How did she do that??

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Hi guys! I got it in Malaysia and it was a one off xx

[@Faylengames]

I'm still grieving, I'm still trying to love my body 6 years after my diagnosis, but your videos are a huge way for me to cope, so thank you once again from the bottom of my heart.

[@blueskythinking6592]

This video was so charming and honest. I one hundred percent agree with everything you said. Also I want “Whatever, I have seen the light and come back” on a t-shirt.

[@danielbar403]

As a 17 year old with chronic depression, asthma and more I definitely agree with all of those. Its honestly amazing you're 30, youre one of the most inspiring people I ever saw!

[@tristanstevens3358]

"Well I can't today Brian! Deal with it!" Thank you for sharing this! It's so nice feeling understood!

[@mulliganstew72]

Sorry, cant today....I have plans to have a sleeping contest with my cat. LOL

[@amydeeb6077]

“You will grieve, but you still have great potential.” Just what I needed to hear today after a negative appointment with my rheumatologist. Thank you Jessica!!

[@ilike_splatoon]

“people will think you have the dream lifestyle” SO TRUE. i have me/cfs, and as a result, miss a crap ton of school. i went back one day, and i had numerous students say “oh your back? how was the free holiday?” and i just wanted to punch them honestly (i did not, but i wished i could 💀) because they think it’s all fun and games when in reality you can’t get up off the sofa, and when you can… ooooh that’s not fun- not fun at all. hello carpet being shoved into my face! we meet again as i fall to the floor!

[@josrambles1975]

"You are allowed to love today's you even if you want tomorrow's you to be different." This is amazing. Thank you!

[@josrambles1975]

Also your hair looks AMAZING today!

[@melancholylove]

Needed this today. Especially the kindness part. I'm constantly angry with myself for not being productive.

[@serendipity1012]

Honestly all of these are so on point I have a hard time picking my favorite. The internet has absolutely saved me. Fanfiction makes me smile when I feel horrible. KZbinrs like you give me a circle of people to turn to to keep me company. Being able to shop online makes days when I need things but can't manage a shopping trip so much better. Also totally agree with becoming an amazing faker. It's incredible how many people have no idea how awful I feel most of the time until I sit them down and explain it in great detail...and then they promptly seem to forget about it all the next time they see me and I seem "fine". Resting is totally a lie. Stress is the worst. Going to the doctor is such a huge bitch. In short, perfect video! 🙌

[@LittleSelfia]

I appreciated how light and happy this was but i had an anxiety attack today and I'm crying at how better i feel and how validating all the points were. TY Jessica youve impacted me more than i can ever really express TY girl you're amazing

[@abbreviatedalex2418]

"You are not 'too' anything. You are today's you, and you are allowed to love the you of today, even if you want tomorrow's you to be different." Wow. I really want that written all over everything I own.

[@nanetteisontheinternet]

I resonate with the points about the internet and doctors appointments taking all day SO MUCH. I’ve always tried to explain to my parents that the internet makes me feel more connected but instead they BLAME screen-time for my chronic illness. Like no, I know what my limits are and I’ve personalized my devices to be safe for my chronic migraines, insomnia, etc. but nooooo everything is because of that damn phone. And the doctors appointments, considering I have so many they have literally become nearly my entire life besides sleeping and eating. “Come 15 minutes early please” so I can wait 45 minutes instead of 30? Okay. And the phone calls, the scheduling, the freaking florescent lights everywhere, like I’m getting a migraine from my DOCTOR’S appointments. I will say I disagree slightly with the mindfulness part, I find deep breathing exercises and other biofeedback stuff helpful. Even though deep breathing worsens the pain for me, I’m able to deal with it better, plus quick body scans of tense muscles help me realize what activities are going to trigger a migraine for me.

[@roumeys]

Last year I was diagnosed with chronic multiple sclerosis, I needed to watch this video. I can relate to almost every point. The "You don't look I'll" is like such a pain.

[@drinkerofalltheteas]

“You could do that yesterd-“ “WELL I CANT NOW, BRIAN.” (My new favorite quote.)

[@lionrence]

"Window shopping for a new house" I do this A LOT.

[@FaithOriginalisme]

Every time I watch one of your videos I get reminded about something important in dealing with chronic illness. Today it was forgiving my body. Please don't ever stop making these videos

[@leeyli]

I love when you "make jokes of yourself", I know few people who carry illness like that with an intact sense of humor

[@sharorviktor]

I was having a terrible pain flare, and I stumbled across this video when looking for new chronically ill & disabled creators. While I've been subscribed and watched your videos for years Jessica, I've been diagnosed with multiple chronic illnesses in the last 12-18 months. This is the first time I rewatched this since being chronically ill took over the reins of my life. Thank you as always for your amazing content, you really help out so many smiles on so many faces

[@Kirsty_McKay]

I nearly choked on my tea watching this video. Every single point in this video I couldn't agree more with. Even 10 years on I still have family that think I'm at it or I'm a wimp, or as my brother asked me last week "you still milking this?" He was 'joking' but we do have a strained relationship at times because of it. I know I'm in a mess health wise but I'm done justifying myself.

[@enieledam]

Number one really resonated with me. I "only" have chronic pain, and I always forget to be kind to myself. It's not my fault that living hurts and it's not my fault for dealing with it however I see fit. I have worth and my body isn't a burden, even to me, no matter how much it hurts. Thank you, Jessica!

[@julial.r.5383]

I will need to rewatch this often in the future. Thank you Jessica.

[@anniegalayda9579]

I SO feel the part about your mental state affecting your physical state. I get the shakes, I twitch, and have TERRIBLE shoulder pain when I'm under stress.

[@fbroom822]

I needed this today. I’m missing work because of my chronic illness. It’s hard to be kind to myself when I know I’m not being the dependable person I know myself to be.

[@freak0la309]

as someone whos gone to the hospital so many times throughout my life, and STILL doesn't have a clear diagnosis, i needed this. thank you. its hard to wake up and be so limited in every aspect of my life because my symptoms wont go away. i need to remember to love myself and not be hard on myself when i can't be productive during my ill hours. thank you again

[@Saraseeksthompson0211]

Really love this and it is all so true and everyone needs to watch it. Also, your story with Claudia on how she advocated for you to get the rest of your diagnosis’ inspired me to write down all of my symptoms and issues and go to the doctor and finally push for a diagnosis. I’m currently still under going tests to fully understand what is happening with my body but a hereditary connective tissue disorder and chronic fatigue syndrome seem to match up the most. I really appreciate all you are doing. You have encouraged me to love myself, rest when I need to, listen to my body and spend time on myself to feel beautiful and this helps me so much. Thank you so much and keep doing what you are doing. Love you and Claudia so much! And Walter and Tilly of course. Also, that dress!!!!

[@em-agan]

Josephine Anne Weigers good luck, I’m doing the same thing rn. It sucks!!! I’m also looking at connective tissue problems so I definitely appreciate what you’re going through.

[@kpwxx]

Hope the process brings you positive things, good luck and well done for taking these steps, symptom tracking and asking doctors for help can both be really hard! X

[@psycobasschick]

Watching you is part of my self-care. When I was first diagnosed, I didn't grieve because I don't think it registered how serious it could get. I was 12, so fibromyalgia wasn't really something significant, especially since I lived through the time of "this is a psychological disorder, there's nothing wrong with you" from the whole world (luckily, my dr didn't feel that way. He even did research on pediatric onset and found nothing, which made him more worried). It's been 22yrs since I was diagnosed. I still work in a physically demanding field (child care, hoping to be working special needs very soon) because its easier to ignore pain when you are mentally challenged. I love hiking because I can literally walk for miles, and being physically exhausted but mentally recharged is great. Being still when I don't have to be is dangerous

[@ghost__char7972]

Hello, where were you living to be diagnosed with fibromyalgia at age 12? Sorry if this is a personal question or one that you cannot answer

[@maghouinbeg5011]

You, my dear, should be prescribed watching for anyone diagnosed with a chronic illness! You explain things better than anyone else I've come across. You are realistic, full of fun, compassion and sensible advice.

[@noelleragsdale37]

This video is so true! I have PTSD and conversion disorder which causes intense joint and muscle pains and tremors. This video also helped give me some ideas to help me not feel so bored and alone.

[@joysfulljourney]

The "finding a way to work within it" is the hardest part... I love this video. So witty and real at the same time!

[@Mia-nu6vv]

My dad has a chronic illness causing him great difficulty when it comes to breathing and I can see him totally understanding many of these points.

[@alisonremusandlil]

I really hear you on the amount of energy I have to put into comforting other people because they’re so heartbroken about my chronic illness. I grew into a massive amount of food allergies as an adult, and I end up in this situation where people are constantly so upset that I can’t eat their one favorite snack or etc. It doesn’t seem possible for me to explain to people that the amount of pain that I’m not in because I didn’t eat that food is the great part!

[@olliepaige9317]

I just got diagnosed and this video is a lifesaver. So many other sources I’ve seen/read are incredibly terrifying and left me feeling super depressed but this actually helps me process things. It really helps to hear that even though I have a chronic illness, I haven’t been sentenced to a life that sucks forever

[@Epimor]

Thank you for talking about chronic illness. Your 30 lessons is funny and TRUE! The thing I dislike most is that family/friends always tells me, that they just read something interesting about fibromyalgi/rheumatism, and I just have to try this... or this... and everything will just be fine again. I never talks about what is wrong with me anymore. My body is mine, - and I know what it can and cannot.

[@BrigDeer]

In the last 4 months I have been diagnosed with a chronic illness and I guess I am still in the grieving, terrified stage. I don't want to sound cheesy, but your videos have really helped and I love your positive attitude and advise.

[@Slidehhy]

How are you now

[@alexandrasartinsanity]

I relate to this video so much. I'm in my first year of uni and more often than not, when I end up in the ER 90% of my time is spent comforting whoever is with me so I can just get on with dealing with the Doctor or trying not to die.

[@curiobrew]

I hate it when people tell me “You don’t look sick”. I'm honestly faking being well, not faking being sick.

[@cecex4545]

The part about stress and chronic illness is so so important! As well as ME/CFS, I suffer from NEAD (Non Epileptic Attack Disorder) meaning emotional or physical stress can cause an immediate fit. Whenever I try to explain that I need to avoid stress I get lectured about how it's a "part of life" and I just need to "toughen up". Like, obviously it's impossible to avoid all stress but even managing to remove small stressors from your life as a chronically ill person can have such positive effects, so if I can do so then I will. There's this bizarre idea nowadays that the more stress and pressure someone is under, the stronger they are and more respect they deserve, and it's illogical. Even as a healthy person it's pointless subjecting yourself to unnecessary stress, but, as Jessica says, in a body that's already under such strain, it can be extremely harmful.

[@briar5]

I just want to say thank you. I’ve been having the worst time of my life since December. Had to let go of a toxic friendship (which was my last close friend). Few family died consecutively within months. Had to leave my job of 3 years. Got into a dark place & gave my virginity to someone who didn’t deserve it. Now I’m worried about pregnancy. I’m starting to lose hearing in my right ear. My vision has gotten a bit worse. But in this the darkest time of my life I’m slowly getting back to somewhere of peace & joy & your videos help remind me that I can be strong and move forward in all things. That I am strong and with tomorrow brings a new chance. ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@kaz555]

Fantastic video, thank you. Watching your videos helps to distract me from my chronic pain and fatigue.

[@sarahvruwink3027]

Omg the “resting before hand”! As a narcoleptic I can, and do, sleep for insane amounts of time and wake up feeling like I haven’t slept at all. No one ever believes me!

[@SeSeMittens]

The last point really hit me. I teared up when you mentioned the part about giving in and living within limitations. I have an episodic chronic illness and I always try so hard to go on as usual even when I am deep within an episode of daily pain attacks. Gosh. I needed to be reminded that I don't have to overcome my illnesses. Thank you. I needed this.

[@karaanne5888]

I watched this video some years ago and didn’t think too much, and now as I’m realizing I have the same back disease as my mom, it’s progressing quickly and things I used to love are now impossible, this video is so helpful and there’s almost nothing so kind and gentle out there. It’s like everyone just wants you to get better and I can’t, I can’t even convince a doctor that anything is wrong because I’m young

[@jaidenfrangou-mayer9784]

I have learned to not just ignore my illness (POTS) and pretend it’s not there. Paying attention to my body and knowing what it’s doing and how to cope with it is the best thing I ever did.

[@equusgirl9126]

Thank you, Jessica for all of these points. I've been chronically ill for over 10 years now, and I still have to remind myself that I have limitations and it's nothing to be ashamed of.

[@JosephineEdwards0617]

Your hair looks lovely as always! I find that keeping a diary helps my mental health - i use a system of 3 good things that happened, 2 things that could have gone better and 1 goal for tomorrow, which helps me plan, but also recognise the little successes. Also, I find that googling my condition is not very helpful and just makes me down sometimes, so I try to avoid doing it when I know I'm having a bad day.

[@Shabnab2]

I have had to move back to living with family due to my housing (or complete lack thereof), and my God I really did not need to hold their hand through MY chronic illness while also trying to get a bloody permanent roof over my head. I needed this video so much, thank you a million times over.

[@teganharris]

I almost burst into tears with number 10. As someone with severe depression and generalised anxiety disorder, it's absolutely devastating when people (notably my mother) talk about how if I don't 'buckle up', my life in future is going to be terrible. It doesn't help! It just makes me even more scared and even less able to be healthy and work hard!! Sorry to rant. It just means so much to hear you phrase so well something that hurts me so much. Love you Jessica!

[@dodorffr]

I just came across this video and found it so illuminating as somone with sever asthma (since birth) and mental health issues I find I have to balance my life so carefully because one panick attack can very quickly become a night in the hospital struggling to breathe because my body decided breathing is randomly not cool anymore. It's so nice to see ways people are able to cope and I genuinely appreciate this type of content.

[@prinzezze]

I recognized many points that are true for me! Living with chronic headache, anxiety, stress, fatigue/exhuastion..

[@iloveheltondog2357]

I have a chronic "mystery" illness that I am working to get diagnosed and I am so grateful to have found your channel. I related to everything you say and I aspire to have your aesthetic. You appear so well put together!

[@RebeccaEWebber]

Yes! Sometimes I just want to stay unkempt because if someone sees me they can't ignore the illness.

[@cyndiisme4185]

I relate to many of these, but not for my health. My mother & godson both suffer from chronic illness. I was a primary care giver for my mom & I'm very hands on for my godson. Even though I don't suffer physically seeing the people you love suffering and you are unable to make it go away is painful too. I am amazed at how strong my mom was dealing with so many things wrong (the list is endless) but was joyful and loving right until the end! My sweet godson is 21 but mentally about 3 with a rare seizure disorder. He is so sweet,loving, funny, and frustrating . My best friend is a goddess of a mom!! He is a 24/7 job with no vacations and she does is so gracefully! Thank you for educating people about this. If I heard "your mom is a hypochondriac" one more time I may have punched them! She didn't look sick so it must be in her head right?

[@havatron3526]

I love this video. I don't have a physical disability or an illness that requires a lot of doctor visits or medications, but I do have conditions that have required me to rearrange my life, my diet, and my expectations. I've struggled with not feeling "sick enough" to count as a chronically ill person. But I identified with a lot of this video. It's made me realize how much thought and energy I put into just feeling okay throughout the day, and all the contingency plans in case I have an attack that lays me out for days at a time. Hearing you talk about your daily life and health struggles (and triumphs) has made it easier for me to accept that my conditions count and the work I put in to care for myself isn't just indulgence. Thank you.

[@fionaWhatever]

i loved this so much! I'm able-bodied but - besides learning more about physical chronical illnesses - some of it also hit home with my mental illness, especially the "there's no such thing as a schedule" point. My brain is still convinced it can aaabsolutely schedule breakdowns/anxiety attacks/ depressive episodes down to a specific week/day so that i can function on this other super important day perfectly fine (spoiler: doesn't work!! who would have thought!)

[@christalcavanaugh]

I’ve taken up knitting lately. Sometimes I’m too tired to sit up and knit, but for the most part I can start and stop with no cleaning (unlike painting) and I can do it all while sitting. Plus I have a finished product at the end of the day (hypothetical “day”) to be proud of or, even better, to give to a loved one.

[@maddie9303]

Don't mind me, just crying over Lesson 1! I've followed your videos for a bit for some reminders to be nice to my asthmatic self, but my cousin was just diagnosed with EDS. And, since it's genetic, it turns out that there's probably a reason I've been in pain for years. While it's nice to know I'm not just a crybaby, it means that I'll have to give up things I love to feel better. I was learning sword fighting, dang it! The "it's not fun, but you can still be happy" was something I needed to hear. So thank you ❤

[@kamiaikens4940]

I'm so happy I found your channel. I wish KZbin was to this level when my sister was alive cause I would have helped her run a channel like yours in 2 seconds. I appreciate you opening up about your life. Reminds me of a lot of her daily struggles.

[@NyoomMonster]

I just sneezed and it made my whole body tingle and now a nerve in my arm hurts

[@katebreck7624]

As a chronically ill person as well, i agree with every single thing you said, makes me feel good that im not the only one who thinks it! Love your work x

[@VladimirSimone]

I love you so much. I've recently started walking with a cane for reasons yet undiagnosed and you are such an inspiration for me. I'm only 20 and we don't know what's wrong with me and I don't see many people in my rough age group who are like me. Thank you ❤❤

[@WateryStar]

I hope you get some answers soon. I had to start using a cane in my early 30's. Still don't know why my gait is off and issue with balance is.

[@princesspeach9398]

As a fellow M.E. sufferer,i am in awe and admiration of how you manage to speak so eloquently! I struggle to remember my own name and what day of the week it is...btw great video, very relateable.

[@Willowing_Weaver]

I recently found your page when someone on tumblr chared this video. I enjoy watching your videos. I'm disabled as well, I have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, which as you know can cause other conditions and an overload on symptoms. Ive been sick since I was 14 and have only been diagnosed for 4 years at the age of 23. So I love finding people who know exactly how I feel about most things we disabled people deal with, I find myself just shaking my head in agreement when I watch your videos.

[@BraveGirlJudy]

Love this Thanku! I have 6 chronic diseases unmedicated. I don’t look sick lol 6 surgeries. Endometriosis, Ulcerative Colitis, Fibromyalgia, Arthritis, Clinical Depression, LPR, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, phew! You are a breath of fresh air Thanku so much for this! 🦋🦋🦋

[@RavenVelith]

Oh my goodness. So many of these are accurate. I did a flail at the mindfulness one. No, mindfulness will not keep my body from breaking out in life threatening painful hives nor will it help during an attack that hurts. Your hair also is always fabulous. 💖

[@LaineML]

#1 is definitely the most important in my life. I am constantly feeling guilty about missing events or work or even being able to do chores. It took a long time to accept I could only do so much in one day because if I push, I'll only feel worse later

[@leamartin8392]

Can't like this enough. As someone with an auto immune disease and chronic pain it's nice to feel validated.

[@maxximumb]

Not having a good day today and I have so much to get done before tomorrow and a lot to do tomorrow. This is just what I needed to hear. I'm feeling very guilty about being ill and letting people down.

[@107613cw]

Oh dear that segment about the paralympics hit me cause I was about to enter a "transplanted running group" even though I don't like running or even have the energy for it. Thanks Jessica, for keeping it real ❤

[@ckind2098]

I really liked the thought "You're allowed to love the you of today, even if you want tomorrow's you to be different". I love that it makes positivity into something that can travel with you, instead of being associated with (or dependent on) certain states or perceptions.

[@Kjata316]

Crying. This was fantastic and thank you. Can’t word it right now but I’m just very thankful for finding your channel. You are an amazing person. 💜

[@ekl1457]

2 things 1) point number 2 was really well said and a way for everyone to think 2) I was just thinking about how amazing your hair looked when you mentioned it

[@hattieboomboom6710]

Love u Jessica!!!

[@jaamesfn]

Yes to mindfulness not reducing pain. The amount of things I went ‘yes’ to this was hilarious. I love when people think I look awful, yay for validation of feeling awful.