4 Ways Confident & “Desperate” Women Behave Differently When Dating a Man

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[@braveheart2657]

Bottom line we need to love and respect ourselves first and to stop seeking validation from a man. We must believe that we are the prize... This eliminates neediness as well as men who are not deserving of our time or attention. Also always guard your heart and do not get to emotionally attached till the man has proven by action that he is worthy of your love and devotion.

[@pieface6701]

Soo true

[@icedcocoa221]

💯

[@jordanbrendmoen4841]

Until you turn 35 then the roles reverse

[@dorotawolinska2628]

@@jordanbrendmoen4841 why do you need to age shame women? :( no one age shames men. What do you want to achieve with comments like that? Wonder if you have a mother or sisters...

[@ThanksThanks-cm4ce]

Brave Heart you are right!!!

[@bintissa5929]

Never prove anything to anyone. Move in silence.

[@bolotabr12]

Well said

[@jayantichatterjee6247]

Perfect. On point.

[@Azizajewelry]

Now that I’ve raised my self esteem and standards I’ve realized all of my female role models raised me to be desperate because they ALL were. Older women around me when I was growing up always complained about their spouses but added they were too old to start over. I was often told to lower my standards and settle or compromise a lot to find someone and be “happily” married, but none of them were happy. I’m glad I realized there was another way. Btw ever since I raised my self esteem with affirmations and Eft/tapping, my finances have dramatically changed for the better and so has my living environment. Just waiting for my love life to follow suit next 😍

[@jonzarah]

azizajewelry, great self awareness. Imagine if you had attracted and married the psychological twin of your former self, ugh. I agree EFT tapping, is life changing. Keep going and all the best!!

[@FruityHachi]

i use affirmations and EFT/tapping too 😊

[@sophisticatedmm3632]

I receive love as well without being desperate

[@Bodangers]

This is what all women should aim for. Just in case the man in your life becomes abusive.

[@MaryMartinez-hj3sy]

Beautiful honest factual share; I'm not alone

[@ZaheedaNaheedya]

Fundamentally, if you're looking desperate for the guy, he's not the man for you/us. He should be making equal effort and isn't worth our time if he is not.

[@missJolie85]

I disagree with the first part. I believe you most definitely can look and be desperate from an objective logical point of view. A lot of the time you even know it yourself, but because of whatever issues you got within yourself, you are not always able to control that. I would argue a good guy shouldn't need to put up with that. Desperation is never a good thing, on both sides male and female. It could be a sign you are not ready for a relationship and should work on yourself first.

[@gabrielamartinyuk9894]

If you’re desperate, you will look desperate and be desperate and he will see that. Not because he doesn’t put effort , but because Someome who is desperate, acts desperate.

[@missJolie85]

@@gabrielamartinyuk9894 Exactly

[@gabrielamartinyuk9894]

Not worth your time? But you’re turning him off with your desperateness. Stop blaming him that he’s not the right guy. The right guy runs for the hills from a desperate woman , to look for the right woman who isn’t desperate.

[@NidaZahoor]

@@gabrielamartinyuk9894 so you are saying if he is going through a tough time and I keep loving him in consideration of his circumstances and waiting for things to get back to normal when he is sound again, then I am being desperate?

[@jasslynlee7261]

“Never prove your worth to other people” YESS 👏🏼👏🏼

[@SamElle]

I hate that the more you try, the more you look desperate :(

[@juliebinstock3721]

It’s true.

[@rebeccabyrne8489]

Just be yourself. Don’t try too hard. It actually makes it easier. If they don’t want to continue a relationship because of who you are you don’t need him.

[@SamElle]

Rebecca Summerville that’s something I need to remind myself!

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

We shouldn't have to play these games. People shouldn't be allowed to arbitrarily change the rules like this.

[@gabrielamartinyuk9894]

Don’t try. Be who you are. Awesome people are awesome. They don’t need to try .

[@Roycebond47]

He is so on point with everything. And I LOVED his book "F*ck Him, Nice Girls Finish Last". Couldn't put it down.

[@Introvertliving]

Was it about literally fucking him?

[@captainswan3079]

@@Introvertliving LMFAO my question exactly too...🍿

[@playresponsibly6040]

One thing I keep in mind mostly whenever I am dating is IF HE IS FOR ME, THEN HE IS. I don't think about I do this and that. Bec I know some girls who have very bad attitude, yet they were adore by their partners. So for me, being yourself must be always every one's number one trait and don't worry much if he or she will love or leave u. Just be yourself, let him or her know what you feel.

[@anjaliverma6478]

God bless you ! Men are complicated ,not women. Women are much more sincere in trying to make relationship work. Keep up the good work..Love your videos.

[@anjielheenalvarezdum1309]

Silence is powerful.

[@sophisticatedmm3632]

Men go haywire when you go radio silent

[@allatsarikova5180]

I love this playlist and the speaker, really. The summary I'm coming up with is this: NEVER FALL FOR A MAN, and you'll do all the right dating things. The mistakes we make are caused by our falling in love, which, admittedly, makes us emotionally dependent and insecure. No matter how confident, well developed and independent you are, you become desperate when you have fallen in love. Love should be treated as any other form of addiction.

[@abogagvjuridico2987]

Amen!!!

[@akshayaelango663]

True that!

[@bink865]

Yeah good point

[@angelinasamson6996]

Love isn’t a person , it’s an energetic high frequency. We can find that to ourselves . Has humans we have come to believe that it takes someone else to give us that emotional uplift or an high has you so rightly put it . We can actually raise our own frequency and become high on life itself I think when we become aware of this , then we don’t need external validation and become aware that love is just a natural high , we are far more likely to be able to walk away . We just have to be mindful of it That’s why I prefer an actual soul connection over physical sexual and even mental connections

[@ursulageorgeson7086]

Watched so many of these and the moral I'm learning is: In dating, try not to feel or show any strong emotions. Men like cool, indifferent confidence. Fake that, and you can have any man you like 😅

[@emmasheridanfamodimu4975]

You have so hit the nail on the head. This is why dating 'The Rules' - i.e. hiding your true self and always being sweet and positive in order to get the ring on your finger actually reeks of desperation. It's the consistent boundaries you set and keep that are so important.

[@Layla-in3ci]

I have never been a desperate woman. I am comfortable being by myself. Having a man does not define who a woman is.

[@staceydenise5538]

Fo sho!

[@mila3432]

Jeez you’re a genius...I love how you’re able to deliver things bluntly but not in a mean way!!

[@bkay4781]

I prefer your real name

[@venben1498]

Biggest takeaway...work hard on your belief. Believing you are worthy of love. Don’t work hard on trying to make someone love you. 👏🏽

[@gardenbee1238]

Thank you, that's smart! It's helped me 😊

[@mariaelizabandolesalcantar3928]

I have 16 kids , 4 cats and 2 lizards so he thinks I am not a match 😂😂😂 gosh this got me lol 😂. You're not just a love guru, you're also a comedian 😂❤️🌺🌸

[@Jewellianna]

This was great!👏👏👏

[@dw7090]

God Bless this man. E-V-E-R-Y video of his hits you right in the heart. So truthful.

[@elizabethjones8465]

Thank you. This is so true. Thanks for concisely getting to the point & spreading a message that everybody can benefit from. We really do teach people how to treat us, especially as women.

[@2beauty24]

Perfect time for me to see this video. Thank you for sharing.

[@31Alden]

Another brilliant, empowering video .. to the very end! You’re the best, Brian.

[@alcudiababe1]

I think if all of that is the case it's either down to a low self confidence or a lack of it, or, a fear of being alone because I was those two things for a very long portion of my life I scared some guys off and when you are lonely and someone's giving it to you you think the world of that relationship and no one tends to tell us how to overcome this (1) When you stop looking - you find. Most of us search our whole lives for the one who will be our Prince charming and want marriage and kids with us but when we reach that despair because we haven't met anyone when we give up looking we find. (2) When you allow yourself to be angry (not aggressive) but angry I find men work harder to make it up with you or at least ask what's wrong because a fear of mine was, if I get angry and I shout and we argue he might leave me. (But tonnes of women get angry and guys try to run over hot coals to find out what's wrong) because it's the fear of - will he stick around? Will he be there when the going gets rough? Think of Ian Beele in Eastenders he's had a type - Cindy. Melanie Owen. Jane. Mandy. He's had a thing for blondes, most of them they sense his desperation by need to impress and he gets treated like crap or used yet he will treat someone like Laura Beale like crap because he thinks someone like her is beneath him. It's a pride thing. His snobbish nature for the finer ladies and to impress them turns them off whereas if he had the self confidence most people would be attracted to him by the different energy he'll have out out there. Self confidence is key. I remember going on a website of how to get my boyfriend back after he'd dumped me because he didn't want a serious relationship. It hurt but I knew I made some silly mistakes when I was with him at the time I thought if I fixed them he'd want me again and I was looking at this website pages and pages of their weekly advice and all it said was to work on me and I was thinking this is crazy I want steps to get him back but I was ready to try anything, so I went out there, dressed up a bit more, developed a shopping addiction but I started being my own best friend, I'd take myself out for a cake at a expensive coffee shop, sometimes I'd wear a suit, different clothes give off different impressions but I embraced being alone and feeling good about it anyway I didn't meet anyone but my sister always said how I always turned heads whenever I walked into a room and I got noticed but by the time I was in a relationship with another person then my ex started showing up at my work place, to the point where everyone noticed him and asked if he'd got together with me. So when I wasn't interested and enjoyed life, going out with friends and family and doing things I found some one else the ex I no longer cared about wanted me. Of course I didn't go back, I'd moved on but if I'd have known it was my energy that I was putting out I'd have changed things around a lot sooner

[@nikitaraireuoja1630]

Thank you very much Brian 💖... for free advices and positive energy. God bless you ❤

[@melissabarnes9469]

You're honestly super helpful in more ways than just the subject of your videos.

[@stephanietang4103]

Thank You for your wisdom on relationships 🙏🏼

[@marinikaP]

Powerful words, Geert / Brian, thanks for putting it so clearly when we do this ! Definitely keeping all of these in mind, body, and heart, as they really resonated as well as continuing to change my beliefs about myself to consistent positive beliefs of full worthiness, be it in relationships, jobs or anything I experience, really. We truly deserve (love and respect) more than how we allow ourselves to be treated at times. (2:53) "Here is a less obvious one that would make you look desperate : accepting inconsistent behavior. One day they love-bomb you, the other day they're nowhere to be found. One day you are their top priority, well seemingly, because the other day when better opportunities are present you're not even on their list of priorities." (3:22) "In a good relationship the good days are supposed to be the rule and the bad days the exception. It's not supposed to be the other way around. (4:45) "When we hide what we believe to be a flaw we devalue (& disrespect) ourselves, and we come across as desperate, because we are. Why else would we be hiding it? When we own our flaws, when we own ourselves entirely - "hi, this is me, good and bad things included" - we come across as ourselves and that's the person our romantic partner should fall for anyways, of course. Otherwise we have a lifetime of hiding and acting in front of us." (5:15) "Acting: Pretending they didn't hurt your feelings, when they obviously did. Pretending you don't really care that much about them, when you obviously do." (5:35) "Not telling them when they have crossed a boundary, but still sticking around, giving them the same amount of love and attention." (6:22) "Always explain it calmly when they crossed a boundary, and then make it non-negotiable. Otherwise it's not a boundary." "If something they did really hurt your feelings, say it! Say it in a calm way, but say it or leave them. NEVER just pretend nothing happened. As a rule : never be afraid to loose them, or you will come across as - and be - desperate." (6:48) "Giving them things they haven't earned yet, and thus trying to earn their approval and attention, while they're not doing the same for you, or at least not at the same level. (...) If there's a big unbalance it's a huge sign of desperation." (7:31) "And that brings me to perhaps the most important concept of this video : NO MATTER WHO THEY ARE, always believe YOU ARE WORTHY OF THEIR LOVE. Always believe YOU ARE ENOUGH. If deep down in all honesty you ever believe you don't deserve a certain person, then work really hard on CHANGING THAT BELIEF, not on changing their perception. Work hard on your belief. Never work hard on trying to be worthy or proving your value to them (...) because that of course would do the exact opposite, and is a huge sign of desperation."

[@marinikaP]

@@HB-pr2tq Thank you ! 💛 It's a bit of an overview of my favorite remarks, not necessarily a full summary of the video. But good to keep these in mind ! And, yes, thanks - working on it, every day it gets easier and we become more graceful and grateful with being ourselves ! We're all in this together, even when that doesn't always seem that way !

[@MaryPAULINElove]

Thank you for sharing! What is the meaning of what he said in 3:22?

[@laurac6895]

I swear this man is a blessing in the world

[@spirarb3754]

I love when u say "i love when you watch till the end of the video". Waited for it😁😁😁😁. You rock

[@natalic6088]

Very eye opening! Thank you for the comparisons with other areas of life.

[@mimiesavali7395]

You calmly deliver the message we need. Thank you ❤️😊

[@shannonteeples2792]

Great Video, Thank you! 😊 I love how you use analogies in your communication.... helps me hear and see what you mean! Keep up the great work ❤️

[@clairefoxall2313]

Thank you Brian always look forward to hearing your advise 🙏

[@forestsprite11]

Thank you, Geert. As always, such brilliant, wise, and deeply helpful content.

[@riddhimajain523]

Thank you sir for giving right directions in life not only just for relationship but our own life's value and making ourselves a better person than before 😊😊💛💛

[@sweetdora5331]

Thanks Sir Brian knox for the message we really appreciate

[@refilwelegae4575]

Your video's are always helpful! Thanks Brian

[@adeyabebabekele2021]

Wow! Your reasonings are to the point! Excellent! Thank you.

[@EmpowerSDP]

I think it’s your best video, Geert. Thanks so much! Please make a video on how to communicate your needs and boundaries without sounding needy.

[@drealstarsweet]

Another good one. Clearly defining Boundries very important. 👍👍

[@maysaraali5772]

I wait for your videos Brian. I hope to see more of it.

[@dgmediagraphics]

Your video captions have a way of making me watch your videos Even when I don't want to

[@susankarlsson5125]

This is by far the best I´ve heard in years, thank you!

[@jasnavarcakovic6716]

Very grateful to find your videos..spot on. Thank you

[@lisacody61]

YOU ARE ALWAYS TRULY WORTHY OF HIS LOVE ❤

[@globinreps6959]

Thank you sister xx you are a gorgeous soul

[@curlymixednezz]

Great info Brian.. thank you

[@amazingsylvie1474]

I’ve done every desperate thing you mentioned. Changing my habits right meow.

[@cheekymonkeygirl3378]

Right meow lol

[@inesa5751]

I love ypur videos and your books. Thank you

[@carlamurphy7541]

Yep I put my hands up...I've behaved desperate just lately I come out a long abusive relationship and it Knocked my confidence so when I meet a man I completely make myself look desperate

[@kristinpetersen5709]

Oh yeeaaa !! Been waiting for a new video 😁💕

[@AB-rh4cc]

Great video! So much insight

[@fayesmith5813]

I truly appreciate your advice

[@LMbe842]

Thank you. I appreciate your emphasis on valuing one’s self and putting effort into that and rather than trying to change him.

[@shawneeblack514]

“What, I was just a bet??” So funny!!

[@IndieCindy3]

Your last point was especially meaningful to me. Thank you so much!

[@parlbesatt]

Brilliant content as always!

[@bonitacadavez9473]

THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS VEDIO

[@wendyblevins3950]

Yes. This one hit me in the right spot. Thank you for the confidence reminder! "Change your beliefs (about your value); don't change him".

[@user-jk5hi4po4o]

Very helpful, thank you!!!

[@dianakellermeyer5621]

I love your work and truly appreciate you. Thank you for keeping me grounded.

[@analisaalapai9385]

Men are way too difficult so many ways.

[@jacquienovoa3209]

Excellent!! You are always on the dot!!

[@jooctober9021]

As always great video . Big thanx from Belgium ; )

[@goldielocksfly3]

Geert, ik vind je zo geweldig. Heel erg bedankt, had ik echt nodig! x

[@veronicachen9734]

You changed the way to introduce your pen name Brian~ I really like this new version haha. Thanks for another great video.

[@heidifoss6788]

Thank you so very much brian.

[@yeeeeeyy]

You are amazing. Thank you for your videos ♥️

[@EdaNavarra]

Have a great day Brian. love you!

[@gulnarshukurova44]

I need to take notes for the future

[@sjgbrighton]

Really helpful thanks.

[@michelleneal6954]

Incredible thank you.

[@marisamarino7596]

Guys need to step it up.. their emotional maturity.. SMH.

[@melamusicworld]

Thanks, I love your audiobook ❤️

[@v_kook_jennie8169]

Your videos are really a reminder to me what I deserve. Thankuh so much ♥️♥️

[@jacquelinenoel2992]

Very good talk!

[@pinkfabulous248]

Great video and advice 🤗

[@antonides-official]

this is so perfect

[@JLSVP]

Always believe you deserve love as who you are!

[@bethmetro8761]

You're the best!!!!

[@lihong9389]

Awesome! I love your wit and humor.

[@kuikt3136]

Thank you for the video. It was eye opening

[@healedinambiance8905]

Enjoyed this video. Thank you.

[@kimtree322]

Nice video (as always). I have to figure which of your books to read. (Order)

[@eyayatouji4323]

this guy is full of wisdom

[@Buffalonian007]

great video!

[@peacewarrior1175]

Great video - thank you

[@shaibya1981]

Love love love thank you for this from the bottom Of my ❤️🙏🏻

[@wrldtrvlr4vr]

Well said!!!!

[@loredanamunteanu5834]

This message is for me 😊

[@SamElle]

Hahahah same

[@elenali9021]

You are pure gold

[@dorothywalter7951]

Thank you!!! 🥰

[@mailmebaby555]

Move the focus from him to you. What you want and be willing to "pay the price" for going for it 100%. Never settle for less

[@finitachiinga1482]

Thank you Brian

[@laidmerdaci9352]

I really love it I hope to be your video longer

[@mypowerfulbrain7221]

Thank you soo much sir..this knowledge meant alot to me..

[@cheekymonkeygirl3378]

I love the content of this video. I acted desperate in the past and I am a changed woman. It’s not ladylike to act desperate.

[@agnieszkatyczynska5572]

Good stuff!

[@Lalaine6789]

oh i love this!

[@sansadrake4133]

Im the opposite of desperate. I don't try at all. So that don't work either 😂

[@sansadrake4133]

@@isismorrissey9075 it depends. The last person kept telling me i was treating him like an option and decided to part ways.

[@sansadrake4133]

@@isismorrissey9075 😂. Well 2bh i was talking about how many different people was trying to get to know me in the period we wernt in contact. So i don't really help myself either.

[@libbylikewhoa]

This made me laugh lol!! "So that don't work either" 😂😂😂

[@sansadrake4133]

@@libbylikewhoa 😂😂

[@joannegallardo1882]

🤣