5 REASONS INFJs THRIVE AS LONE WOLVES

[@Wenzes]

Do you like the "lone wolf" lifestyle? Is there something you are missing?

[@imnedmonton]

I don't run with a pack. Rather than floating down the River of Life in a crowded boat, I prefer to row in a kayak (single passenger). Stay safe and be well. Love from Canada. ♥

[@paulachenkonobert3802]

Lone Wolf, on most days, is the only way I can survive, but yes.. some days there is something missing.. Still looking for someone to share life with, that I don't freak out or intimidate, or scare away... But until then, my bike will just have to keep its solo seat... And no, it's not everybody else that has created this...it's me.. lol

[@Chercheure_Indépendante]

As crazy as this sounds, "another self"

[@مجتهد-خ2ف]

After being abused by the people closest to me, I decided to live as a lone wolf and find comfort in that

[@leeparkin5503]

Yes. No.

[@cc1k435]

I like the THOUGHT of having people around, sometimes more than the actual thing itself. 😂

[@SubvertTheState]

Well I think we idealize our friends and family. And when they say the same thing about some other person for the third time in two hours...You kind of get let down. I start to think that nobody is capable of introspection, of being genuine with another person. Most people are running on software which is 100,000 years old. That's not impressive, using fancy language to rationalize why war is a good thing, for example, is simply using the technological products of modern civilization, to invent excuses to murder people. It's....Isolating to see these things and not get frustrated.

[@Florian78]

I know what you mean. 😉

[@cirocasarin]

That makes three of us

[@kingfisher9553]

Amen. For me there is no "sometimes."

[@perlacoffie6654]

😅😂😅 me too

[@Chercheure_Indépendante]

1:08 #1 We finally let go of our obsession with others 2:20 #2 we finally get to know who we are 4:35 We're finally forced to get into the driver's seat 6:24 We can finally find the balance of the perfect relationship dynamics (it's fine that one person fills one aspect of your life, another one fills another one, etc...) 9:30 #5 We finally understand when we're being overstimulated

[@nonnaslilboy]

I’ve always known I need more alone time than most, and your videos have helped me embrace it. Thank you!

[@peacedujour]

I am definitely a lone wolf! I'm 64 and just recently discovered I'm an INFJ! It explains everything in my whole life. And, its such a relief to know. Thank you for your videos.

[@DearYoungerSelf111]

Welcome to the club you have always belonged to! I like hearing life experiences of us INFjs who are more refined in years - look forward to your contribution to the community🎉

[@LyndelWilliams-o7r]

I have always been comfortable being alone. Just me and my music. Problem is the people around me who dont understand it. I get accused of being stuck up or what i hear most often is "what are you doing that you dont want us to see?" Lol. They will never understand...

[@julieb3432]

This reminds me of one of my favorite lyrics from the musical, Wicked; "If I'm flying solo, at least I'm flying free." As an INFJ, that line has been the main theme in my life.

[@DearYoungerSelf111]

Love the quote - the key word for me in the quote is free! Free to roam in my mind or roam in my physical environment without having to accommodate other energies - it's draining to do so for me - and with my Fe if people are around I will almost want to make some type of accommodation for them to be comfortable- and I were honest- I hate doing that all the time - Is this selfish?

[@julieb3432]

@@DearYoungerSelf111 I agree 100%. It is also draining for me. I don't think it's selfish at all. How often do people expect us to give give give, but no reciprocation? How often do we perform emotional labor for others while getting very little in return? I wouldn't call it selfish, I would say we are recognizing the true value our time and energy.

[@DearYoungerSelf111]

@@julieb3432 ❤️🙌🏾💯

[@tamrayoung6045]

I feel off balance when I'm in community with other people. I feel more at ease and free when I'm by myself. Being by myself makes more sense, as far as my balance, then not. It's freeing to finally understand that about myself.

[@courtneygillespie1187]

I think I want interaction but then I remember how ridiculous everyone is and then I'm ok.

[@jerrimenard3092]

I am an INFJ in my 50's who has found comfort in compartmentalizing my relationships. I hang out with people doing an activity I like, just for that one activity. So book friends never meet gym friends or foodie friends. I hang for as long or short a time as I like. When I write, I am like the nasty hermit. Stay out of my cave! I want peace and this is the way I can get it.

[@tomsilver8241]

This makes me remember what it was like in my youth. I am so glad to be over that young person issues. Getting older can be so cool.

[@alnotz]

Somehow true... but society punishes the old... .now you can whatever define yourself another gender, but cannot define yourself 10-15 years younger... what a discrimination (cynic mode off)

[@tomsilver8241]

@@alnotz I would not want to be any younger, I love being what I am as old as I am. Anyway I feel 35 and look great, fool head of hair , great body so whatever.

[@tomsilver8241]

full that is, although at times I can be a bit foolish.

[@alnotz]

@@tomsilver8241 agree with you. Main thing, you are content and love yourself. Same here... and here comes the but. Women of the same age want no kids. Or can't. Younger ones want the rich. I never in my life could earn more than eq.of 1000USD a month serving 15ys in the army, now just endless legal cases of health, dismissal fee etc. debts refusal ignorance ghosting. Plain reality tho sounds like whining... Well I could use a 10year refund to put at least a couple of things right)))

[@nicholamc2629]

I have great friends but I choose to spend most of my time alone and I don’t get lonely. I’m just deeply depressed. 😂

[@Senta-bg8rb]

being a lone wolf is a much easier life as I don't have to deal with unnecessary drama.

[@corporaterobotslave400]

"Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast" is a saying I've heard from many instructors including martial arts, firearms instructors, motocross teachers, etc. So true.

[@michaelbrown9891]

Absolutely spot-on for me. I have often thought of myself as the lone wolf. Very protective of his family but needs a lot of alone time. I have spent a considerable amount of time in self reflection of my life and introspection to connect with my true self soul. I think we are people pleasers, even though we might not consider that to be the case. Saying “no” or trying to stop over explaining or justifying myself, are insecurities that I am still learning to overcome. Keep up the good advice. Thank you. 💕😇

[@YAMISOOLD2009]

Yes we are people pleasers michael. Maybe the most of any personality type though we are almost always in denial about it and it is ultimately a path to burnout.

[@bv459]

Amen. I'm learning now to stop over explaining myself.

[@stephaniebell4272]

At nearly 70, I have finally found my favourite way to be. I have never been happier than being my own best friend. My husband of 35 years loves me just the way I am.

[@DiZZoLabs]

I ❤ your thumbnails Wenzes. You always look like a stunning badass. 🥰

[@ameliarose6648]

This is extremely validating. I feel like there’s a societal pressure to be hanging out with people. So i suffer with FOMO but i also feel my best when i give myself more alone time.

[@YAMISOOLD2009]

Yes I agree with that feeling. I think that is why I am always happy when any given holiday on the calendar is past!

[@lydiarosebrita4901]

I find that being by myself is the only time I can really come up with original ideas for my life and for exciting plans and projects.

[@deborahwolff5651]

Yes, I thrive as a "lone wolf" lifestyle because I feel I am in my own comfort zone and in the driver's seat. I have two wonderful woman friends, and we get together twice a month and have a great time. We are on the same wave length, and it is great, and it gives me the right amount of balance

[@chuck3999]

It's all about knowing your own boundaries and setting limits with others. Also, it's alright to say NO and not be guilty about it.

[@megan2176]

I wish I knew sooner that it was OK to be a loner. I used to always feel like I was being compared to the rest of my family (mom, dad, sister), who are all very social with lots of friends, and felt like I was unlikable, even though I did have a few close friends. I just never felt the need to over extend myself, or go too far beyond my circle. Glad I know now that it's totally OK, since at 44, I only really have one close friend, and she's a childhood friend (the best kind!). ❤😊

[@megan2176]

Plus, with my own kids and husband, they're friends enough. ❤

[@Ela29653]

We are too good natured and innocent as a first response and others take advantage of that. For me it meant cutting everyone off in a way and only letting them in when its a mutual give and take relationship.

[@immortaljanus]

I love being alone, just not by myself.

[@lindateuling7862]

This one was easy to identify with!🙂 I especially appreciated your statement, "Slow is smooth and smooth is fast." I thought of two of my own important pillars (1) "Sometimes we need to take time to save time," and (2) "Sometimes we have to slow down to speed up." I think that your statement fits in well and is a good thing for me to remember when I need to sort things out. In the past, I often surprised myself how quickly I can get things done if I allowed myself to begin slowly. As for having a variety of friends, I think that's a good idea, too. We probably need to make a plan for this in a way that would fit with our introverted nature, and it's possible. I believe that "slow is smooth and smooth is fast" could fit well here. The time that we take for ourselves can definitely keep us from being overwhelmed as think and plan these things through at a speed that fits us rather than everyone else Good video, Wenzes.

[@JT-cf5ol]

don't need nor want other people's drama, or lack of common sense.

[@activedogzz100]

So true! I had a major panic attack when lockdowns were over.

[@marcp.1752]

Funny thing though, i thought about this all my life...but only (very) few ppl are accepted, alright into our inner circle of trust.

[@jerome6572]

Wenze's I do like the "lone wolf" style the only thing I'm missing is love of me I'm spread to thin I need to learn to say "no" I'm a immature INFJ. Thank you Wenze's ❤❤❤

[@seamusburke9101]

It took me an awful long time to learn to say no,but now I've got the hang of it I love it. You just have to realise you were saying yes to all the wrong people. They take you for granted all the time so just watch how ugly they get when you suddenly say no to them. Remember if you make a doormat of yourself,people will wipe their feet on you.

[@maybee...]

It's my inner strength.

[@terrijamison9154]

Me too 🎉

[@DashiPrime83]

This is one of your best videos. 🎉

[@billythegoat5000]

Thank you so much from the bottom of my itty bitty little heart for the work and help you share! Words cannot describe!

[@ocho8172]

Great points all! Space needs- Yes! "Slow is smooth, smooth is fast"- Yes: I think deeply fundamental, & properly oriented warrior principles are an undeniable part of the INFJ. "Holistic"- Yup.- Different people in our lives, fulfilling different aspects of our wants/needs is very true. "Time (to) deeply connect to (ourselves)"- Excellent! Avoiding overstimulation, in order to stay 'on track', Yes! Thank you SO much, Wenzes! You are a Great Guide! God Bless!

[@saltrock9642]

My wife understands. That’s all that matters.

[@alnotz]

Yes it is. you are lucky.

[@irodirod4679]

Sooo valuable and helpful , very thankful for what Wenzes does. Literally , no one else can do what she does for INFJs . Thank you!

[@daleg4299]

Excellent video. Thank you so much!

[@TroyPosey]

Excellent video Wenzes! 🙂 Also, I like the new viewing angle...You see more of the background, the plant, the painting, and it looks much more natural of a view as if we're sitting in the office talking to you. It's more relaxed. 👍🏼 I have always been a lone wolf, and I have always loved so many aspects of that lifestyle...But the older I get, the more I fix myself and heal, and realize that life was not meant to spend it alone all the time 24/7-365... I don't count work and coworkers and stuff as "being around people", because work is separate (lower, typically unwanted) level of interactions for me. I find myself craving companionship...Love...Relationship...Happiness...Etc... But now I'm afraid that I've lived a lone wolf lifestyle and am so set in my ways, that I have no idea how to play the dating game anymore. So much has changed since I last tried to date. I gave up even trying for about 10 years. But I also wasn't healed, and was extremely toxic. Now that I've healed so much of myself for the better, I see my toxic past, and never want to go back to that. I think that a good woman that truly understands me and treats me right will be a very nice addition to my life, and never hinder it, or my personal freedom or growth. And I would never do that for her, either. Helping each other grow and be the best people we can be...Together. Unfortunately, all the awesome women I know that truly take the time to get to know me and love me and understand me, are also married, or dating someone else, and only see me in the friendzone. 🤦🏼 I don't know... I just feel ready to give up again. I'm 37 and still ain't found her yet, I honestly am starting to think "the one" just might not exist for me. 😞 I hope you have an amazing week my friend! 🙂🌹❤👍🏼

[@Kidvi77]

As an infj it's an empowering video to me. Also yes, I have never been to Facebook, insta or on other social media platforms like never and people often times run out in whack when I tell them( I mean that whacky recation as because they think that in today's era one can not survive without being on insta and Facebook types of thing) Although to be on these SM platforms I never found it fascinating except LinkedIn,KZbin and some other...It is a great video. thank you so muchhhh

[@folday6169]

Wenzes, thanks for helping us understand ourselves!

[@helentaylor6375]

Thank you Wenzes. I would say that its because of your videos that I became aware that I’m probably an INFJ, and this knowledge and your videos are helping me so much😊

[@AnyaAnnika67]

I'd be mindful that respectfully in a Jungian sense, Wenzes is actually a cognitive ISFP which is an equally wonderful type. Unfortunately due to behavioural imbued stereotypes most people tend to mistype as an INFJ when in fact they're a very rare type.

[@AnyaAnnika67]

I think this was exemplary advice for everyone but not necessarily applicable to any one cognitive type. I'd an added caveat is that the cog fund INFJ isn't really focused on what's going on with people around them; as ni-Ti convergents yes they are observational but they don't tend to get embroiled in other peoples dramas; they are primarily abstract rationalists after all. I will ISFPs can often, owing to their Se authority function feel like they are lagging behind, as you said when they are not in the drivers seat as Fi is trying to fully integrate Te the outside world/trying to fully reconcile itself with the world. Great advice but from a cognitive ISFP, another wonderful type 😊. Tapping into your own energy is very Fi-Ni esq & with a developed divergent Se-Te an ISFP can surely accomplish what they set out to do.

[@malmalgosia6702]

So, so good- thank you! Your work does make a difference!

[@keshab1476]

Do you voice a commercial? I saw an Activate Your Wellness commercial and, to me, the person sounds just like you! I am an INFJ and I appreciate your content so much! Thank you for it

[@msk806]

Thank you for your descriptions ❤

[@AS004-xf4jc]

Feel like I am lone wolf but need to socialize because of knowledge.

[@stego2012]

I work alone and it's better that way. I've been fired and let go from jobs several times. I was never lazy or crooked. Hatred vengeance, and sabotage from coworkers ruins the chances of any advancement.

[@شمس-ي2ب1ن]

Simply you focus on ti and yeah it is helpful ❤

[@NorthStarPNW]

Exceptionally good topic. Just an idea, you might include a link in description for people to test their MBTI since many viewers may have no idea what this topic is all about.

[@AnyaAnnika67]

Unfortunately tests are predicated on behaviour & not cognition - 1in5 people will receive an INFJ result in conjunction with the behaviourally imbued stereotypes most people will mistype. INFJs are primarily abstract rationalists with Ni-Ti convergence; Wenzes is a cognitive ISFP which is an equally wonderful type..the Fi-Ni convergence is very obvious.

[@angelarrkhu4606]

Lone Dragon Boy

[@noura4522]

Hi wenzes, I’m on my phase of lone wolf, I know what direction I want because of this time by myseld and facing no other choice for my life. Now I have a gap between my vision and my reality that makes me overwhelmed, how I get closer and do you recommend your audio guide ? I have fear of showing up to the world although I like being seen !

[@user-cn4lq2wy9n]

Thank you Wenzes. I really needed this confirmation. I felt a bit fomo lately coz my friends are being in a relationships and ig i was kinda influenced a bit... Even tho I identify as aroace, I wanted to know if it's trauma that's making me keep that identity so i tried to like people more than just friends. There's this boy that kinda hinted that he likes me... So I tried analyzing our convos and asked my bsf for her opinion about what she thinks coz i don't wanna be delusional lol and said he did indeed sent lots of hint but I already told him I identify as aroace so ig he backed off a bit but we're still good friends. He's in a relationship now and I feel actually relieved tbh... But the confusion of it all left me feeling like a swirling chaos of emptiness if that makes sense. Coz I knew what I wanted. I just wanted to fall in love with myself and it really felt wrong tryna find that from somebody else just coz it's what's everybody in this age is doing. I had it all figured out. And yet the feeling still lingers. I accept the possibility of ending up being alone and tbh that's so okay with me. I just need loyal friends who cares enough to check up on me from time to time and appreciate my existence. That's all I need. Really. As an aroace that's enough for me.

[@sueaug74]

Lone Lion 🦁💖💜 Awesome Wenzes! Thank You 💞✌️🌹❤️

[@Third_Eye_on_the_Sky]

Alright so I looked into it and I found the world of Meyers-Briggs personality type indicators and had to see what I am considered, naturally and the verdict is INFP. I know what you are thinking congratulations who cares about my personality so now you know how we feel stumbling upon your content. Obviously I am just kidding mostly, take utmost care. ✌️❤️

[@alnotz]

@@lynnesimpson8284 My test was like 55% towards J and 45% towards P... so it is not black and white.

[@Third_Eye_on_the_Sky]

@@lynnesimpson8284 The rarest personality type, that's a beautiful thing when observing the collective. I don't want to be anything like most people. In my experience I am deeply wounded usually betrayed by expecting people to be anything like me. This is something I am working on but, still struggle with. ✌️❤️

[@Third_Eye_on_the_Sky]

@@alnotz Always was weary about psychology altogether based simply on the vast differences from one person to another. Countless factors and possibilities randomly unfold in real time constantly that eliminate a single chance in hell for accurate personalized diagnosis, categories, and treatments so rigid and limited. In fact it appears that psychologists are nothing more than oblivious members of intelligence agencies collecting data and methodology capable of manipulating the collective consciousness in any desired direction which is literally too evolved to recognize today at every level down to the very language we speak. 🤦

[@alnotz]

No, I feel I can't continue this alone. But there is no hope to be fixed... I don't believe in wonders anymore, too late.. I was alone for almost all my life, in soul.. Right now I feel it was just the warm shit I was too lazy to get out, stinks but at least warm.. At this very moment I just feel I'm old, poor, humiliated and have a raped soul. As the last dust fall in the hourglass, waiting for the pain to end finally.

[@NightMystique13]

Sadly, I feel much the same.

[@bennyregohos1650]

People are exhausting

[@MoteOfDust430]

Or you can sit and appreciate a beautiful sunset by yourself without feeling guilty for not sharing with someone else.

[@Marilag2911]

Your the only person in this entire platform who can explain what truly an INFJ is. Please keep doing what your doing. Thank you so much ❤️ I'm an old watcher but I drift away cause I don't like your ideas then only to find out that I'm just in denial of who I am. I used to think that this gift is a cursed and If I could just be like everyone else, oblivious and only care for themselves. But life makes me realize the hard way that this gift is a blessing for me to help others, cause this realm or world or what it is in a fvcking mess right now.

[@vincentkretzschmar4988]

Watch and liked all your videos. Now there's a gap in my time haha

[@naturelover1284]

more like under stimulated by brutes, and dissing of studies and information, and good discussion..it is dull out there

[@TheBigdog868]

Being two standard deviations above normal IQ, I know exactly what you're going through. Anything close to 130 puts you in this range.

[@susanc.2207]

I can't do spontaneous. I have to plan and need 24 hours. Hanging out sounds fun but i can't do spontaneous. I don't have many friends and i don't want lots of friends. There are lots of reasons to think im different and unusual. I don't care much what others think, even family, but i have been scaprgoated for it.

[@ambraiezzi5037]

Sista. 😄 💙💙💙

[@2Sage-7Poets]

sounds like me..

[@pumpyourselfup7683]

Lone Easy Going Princess

[@TyreeDuncan-2143]

Well the obsession with others is when others are messing with your Brain. So you obsess yes upu do in trying to find out who they are. So that's what the obsession is. 😊

[@Lonewolf_rider]

🐺hooowuuu.

[@junaid29182]

Please writing in English show language

[@ayy1820]

Are you an INFJ yourself?

[@AnyaAnnika67]

Wenzes is an ISFP another amazing cognitive type 😊

[@TheFirstOnlyRealUltra]

🥰

[@RB-re8kj]

sometimes the infj just must accept they're not needed and fade away.

[@illiterate_reader]

touché

[@MikeyPaper]

The thumbnail alone is cringe worthy enough...

[@EliasGraves]

We are forced to be lone wolves because we are insufferable assholes.

[@robertroutley6491]

the amazing sunshineyou'll know who I amRedrum was the case they gave me 👻✍️👑I should have nevermessed with me I'm FED 🤪🤣🧠🔌⚖️🦈 up with them Sigma INFJ Empath 😉❤️❤️❤️

[@kokikokic9874]

I just want to stop being an INFJ, and just get it over with, the coping and the constant pain and tricks to make for the fact it's the worst type to be, I can't take it anymore. ESTP and ENTP with their psychopathic nature have it so easy and even their weaknesses are strengths. We are the opposite and are created to suffer, depend on others cus we are not really good at anything, and when we achieve a lot we cope with the results but know deep down we burn ourselves so much more then others for the same result. I pray to God I magically stop being this unlucky personality type, I didn't ask for this.

[@AnyaAnnika67]

I doubt your a cognitive INFJ in the Jungian sense so I wouldn't worry (Wenzes is an ISFP); most people mistype as the INFJ when they're in fact a very rare type. The INFJ is actually an abstract logician not the fi-ni convergent Wenzes is describing. Id be mindful of equating ENTPs & ESTPs with having psychopathic traits; these are behavioural stereotypes that have nothing at all to do with Jungian cognition. As Fe agency types this is often far from the case.

[@kokikokic9874]

@@AnyaAnnika67 Yes, if you talking about that rare abstract logician, who is so uncommon (not to self boast, not even in a good way) that I feel like an alien even among "weird" people, and felt understood first time in life when I fully researched cognitive functions, and figured out finally after all this time why I'm so different, very specifically and precisely. Yes I am as literally the real INFJ as it can get, but I also highly doubt that other people are that, as I can tell very fast when someone just thinks they are one, and I still didn't meet another one for sure. Typed as an INTP multiple times btw, just later figured out I'm not one after becoming very good with functions and seeing how inaccurate any test is. By ExTP's, I was just blowing up that word for effect, I mean't their Fi blindspot, and as I know multiple of them very closely, I know exactly how that manifests. And in some way it can be called psychopathic but by that I mean their natural ability to be very not sensitive emotionally and I also noticed physiologically, which is a positive.

[@jjsanders8542]

I absolutely need alone time & I love it! Humans drain my soul. I love being around dogs though, they re-energize my spirit.🐾🫶

[@jenniferedmondson5019]

This one is excellent . Thank you