5 Signs of A Dysfunctional Family Dynamic

[@TAKEULTIMATETOTHEFACE]

In my experience, opening up to each other (family) is like asking for insults or arguments :/

[@domik3114]

agreed

[@bluebird3042]

Yep!

[@yutanakamoto7069]

Same :(

[@kaydeshabeneby8282]

Real

[@HikiOmo]

That or an hour long conversation and loads of questions you don't want to answer at the time

[@derekbacharach]

As a therapist, I have clients who have experienced at least one of these in their family upbringing. What's so hard is to realize you're in a dysfunctional family while you're in it because you have nothing to compare. I hope there's another video that can answer the question my clients ask me and probably some viewers who come from dysfunctional families: why? The short answer to this is it's Intergenerational transmission. It's not genetics; it's learned and passed on. The good news is by watching this video, or if you already realize you come from (or still are in) a dysfunctional family, you flicked the switch in your mind from auto-pilot to manual, the first of many steps you can take to break the Intergenerational pattern and prevent the dysfunction from getting passed down.

[@thomasbley412]

We’ll said! I wholeheartedly agree with you!

[@gnarthdarkanen7464]

Whether you enjoyed it or not, "The Truman Show" with Jim Carrey DID have one particularly profound line in it about this phenomenon... "The mind will accept the reality it's given." ~Ed Harris (if I recall correctly)... These intergenerational issues and cycles keep going on because that's EXACTLY how it works. Once someone's mind has simply accepted "This is [normal] reality." then they adapt to it. It's a dubiously double edged sword, though... AND it's not necessarily all together a terrible thing. To the good, our human ability to adapt to "reality as presented" enables the very VERY wide variety of cultures and lifestyles. It's a BIG world we live in and there are actually MANY ways to answer questions and resolve problems presented to a society depending on the time, technology, and territory involved. In some parts of the world just going to school for "basic education" involves a yearly days-long trek through truly dangerous territories covered in ice and snow with arctic winds, little or no shelter, and roaming predators that really CAN kill the children trying to get to their schools and teachers. Other parts, there simply isn't such a thing as "formal education" and it's all handled by the village elders, often teaching in pairs... and both teachers basically talking over each other at the same time... Still others process students through tests for aptitudes and the state determines exactly which diplomas or degrees the students will be allowed to pursue, and anything "extra-curricular" must be earned as a privilege through academic excellence in the specified subjects... ...and that's only 3 of many methods of determining education... and ONLY about basic education... BUT it's a big enough planet that such a variety is OKAY... Different place, social structures, and "accepted realities". To the detriment... Spanking and whipping has been allowed to a degree of abuse for FAR too long and by far too many. The ideals that "boys will be boys" is an excuse for bullying and in-school violence has been too acceptable for far too long along with excuses like "Children are cruel by nature."... and many worse things. Over generations, the adults in question simply don't know that anything else is possible. Even if they know it's possible, they consider themselves to be "just fine" (whether that's true or not) and don't know how to try to make anything else feasible... even if it IS imminently possible. They just do NOT know any better... AND (worse?) even accepting that there might be "something better" requires that they accept that they are NOT actually "just fine". It's literally IMPOSSIBLE to continue to function under the assumption that you are "wrong". You can even test this... Listen to a friend's suggestions... and at EVERY single one, tell them it's wrong, even if you have to scramble through mental gymnastics to explain it... every suggestion "can't be done, because it's (somehow) wrong." After you've successfully frustrated them into silence (or hopefully just shy of tears) obviously admit and explain that this was ONLY an experiment... BUT notice the speed at which they "shut down"... They can't function... knowing the assumption given is that they're wrong every time destroys the function... THIS is why our brains and minds have evolved to "accept reality as-is and adapt"... as a basic instinct. It's a damn difficult instinct to fight down or work around. It's blood effective for survivability. No good comes of continuing to smash your face into a brick wall, because you're never EVER going to knock a brick wall down with your face! SO you accept reality about that, and go find a bigger F-hammer. The same applies to our upbringings and passing on our fundamental values and methods because that's also ALL we know... Changing it is HARD. BUT the first step comes with acknowledging the problem... Sometimes, as some schools of thought suggest, "Acknowledgement of the problem CAN be enough." Maybe it's not a big, ugly, self destructive problem. So long as you don't avoid it, but rather face up and own the problem you carry, you can make sound decisions BECAUSE of that acknowledgment. Then you resolve issues before they cause any self destruction, and you can move on... at least, until someone comes up with a better course of management or even treatment, in case technology provides that your "problem" is curable... ;o)

[@XxZekeKnightxX]

That's my experience to a T. I grew up knowing that in my heart of hearts that something wasn't right, but I couldn't figure it out until much later in life, after the damage was already done. Thanks to therapy I've figured out that my experience wasn't normal or even right. My parents ignored me to pay attention to my brother's needs, which I allowed them to do so because "I'm the big brother and have a less severe form of autism than he does". This was why I, starting as early as 9, sought out romantic partners and kept trying for years with little to no success. I'm coming up to 20 years since then, learning the truth of my situation and had been trying to leave as soon as I turned 18, also with little success. I've been trying my hardest for 10 years to leave. I'm really hoping that this will be the year I finally break through, I'm really close to getting a degree(really two) which hopefully will net me better opportunities and higher pay than retail. I hope I leave in time, because despite my attempts to try and bridge the gap, they weren't willing to reciprocate, and now things are heating up as I've become more and more aware through therapy and regular separation from them. No joke, if the promise of a career was a lie, I'd still want to be in school for the funds to live away from home and receive affordable and accessible therapy. I am also taking the opportunity, with the time I have left, to study abroad like I wanted to do but couldn't because I failed speech that year, and had to retake it, and still failed. Anything to be away from guilt-tripping mom and money-controlling dad.

[@ekasupariyanti2288]

As someone who grows from dysfunctional family (i would say that), i think what you said is true that we don't have the right example of 'the right family' of 'how we should treat our loved one' and of 'how we should be treated in the right way'. So it happens that i have quite avoidant attachment style and try to push people away from me. I just realise that this isn't the right way to treat people that u love because i spent some time with my uncle&aunt's family and theirs looked so different from mine and that's when i'm aware of something is wrong. Thanks for sharing about this, especially to Physic2Go. I hope many people - especially future parents would be considerate about the trauma that they could give to their future child. Be wise before making any big decision in life

[@derekbacharach]

@@gnarthdarkanen7464 Well said. You don't have to look far to see hope. ZekeKnight posted after you he knew something was wrong. Like in the movie The Matrix, Neo knew at the beginning of the story something was wrong and Morpheus guided him. ZekeKnight and many others realized the dysfunctional kool-aid they are or were drinking wasn't healthy. What's extremely hard is when you realize your family dynamics is wrong, how do you deal with this realization while you have to emotionally survive? It takes emotional & cognitive gymnastics to develop the appearance that you buy into drinking the kool-aid while you really oppose it. Call this acting, dual identity, whatever you call it it's part of surviving.

[@games4boredom1549]

Fear, neglect, silence, and isolation...man, this video made me cry. I'm tired of this kind of life

[@ivythealiencat]

These damn bots. I hope ur doing ok

[@indonesiakid1396]

@Sista Rahman Shut up go outside

[@tamaraserrano7415]

I also cried. I realize I have the toxic tendency of silent treatment. It’s the only thing I’ve ever known. I hope I can change that.

[@games4boredom1549]

@@tamaraserrano7415 same. I've learned to do silent treatment on my parents as well cuz that's what I've learned from them. But whenever they ignore me, it still hurts and I can't help but cry silently. Maybe we'll be okay someday. You know. At least we're trying to be aware of the problems we have in our family and their effect on our mental health.

[@tamaraserrano7415]

@@games4boredom1549 absolutely! ☺️ and hopefully we can change our future homes. I hope you find comfort through these moments, thank you for your lovely words. Though you are a stranger, I appreciate your kindness and sincerity. ☺️ we will be okay. We can make a difference. 🤍 Blessings to you dear.

[@khalilahd.]

It’s incredible how accurate these videos are. Your commitment to healing my inner child has encouraged me to prioritize my mental health and to work through these childhood traumas. I hope nothing but growth and continued healing for those still navigating these feelings 💚

[@tommygunn6901]

Facts! It's taken years and years for me, but I had to cut em off for good

[@tmoneydamaster20]

Going through a tough time and my parents refuse to let me see a therapist. They probably hope ive forgotten about it, but i still remember when the doctor diagnosed me with depression. They care too much about money.

[@dacitaylor7480]

@Sista Rahman n.

[@quekchunpei9095]

@@tmoneydamaster20 same here.Wish l wouldn't born in this type of family. We incarninate into the wrong type of family. We should stress them ,strive for therapy for our own health !

[@elhadjdiallo633]

@@ppuddiing the reason why your sister call you ugly is because you are better and more prettier than her that's the reason why she called you ugly she is insecure about her self also she's a narcissist don't mind her at all !!!! Toxic people belittle, degrade and undermine others because the feel insecure they feel like you are better than they're etc.......don't ever pay attention to bullies at all they're jalous , envious , toward someone who they think possess all the quality and possession than they're ..

[@sundaymorning4404]

Here is a Summary 1. 0:21 - Fear 2. 1:06 - Codependency 3. 1:58 - Neglect 4. 2:30 - Silence 5. 3:09 - Isolation

[@Vishakha_B897]

1,3,4,5 for my family.

[@AurelienCarnoy]

Dang. We got it all...

[@TheKingOfCurses98]

lmao all of those above happening to me

[@markyheart336]

1,2, and 5 for my family

[@phantomvampyressshadowkiss4690]

This is my husband's mother. You can't talk to her. She dismisses, deflects, denies and victimized

[@btcxwxy]

Here you all go: 1) Fear (0:23) 2) Codependency (1:07) 3) Neglect (1:58) 4) Silence (2:31) 5) Isolation (3:10)

[@405OKCShiningOn]

💯🌟

[@SleepingOnTheSeafloor]

Thank you! ^^

[@Twigs929]

how did you know these bloody time travelers and their shenanigan's smh

[@Pinkio]

unlisted momento lol

[@nxsta1o982]

1 month lmao

[@Larry_Alvarez]

Both of my parents use fear as advantage for me and my sibling for more than a decade and my father is the one who abuses it the most. I tend to find the cracks and fight back and encourage my sister later on. Both of us are no longer in fear of what we stand on, he's no longer a problem.

[@MoodyBluesRequiem80]

That's so brave! You should be proud of yourself! Your sister is lucky to have you

[@alexandriarogers7920]

As a new mom to a beautiful 6 month old baby girl, I greatly appreciate all the parenting psychology content you've all been putting together. It helps me know what signs to lookout for and how to be aware of how mine and my husbands parenting styles affect and will later affect my children as they grow. And as such I can try to be a better parent to them and give them the best life I can. Thank you for all the parenting psychology content 😊

[@tmoneydamaster20]

Good on you for educating yourself and trying to make sure your child doesn't suffer. You sound like a fantastic parent :D 💖

[@thomasbley412]

The mere fact you are mentioning this shows that you are ahead of the curve! Love them for who they are but don’t lose yourself and your partner, together you’ll meet the challenges of parenthood, hand in hand, step by step. They will love you and thank you for being there for them, hand in hand, every step of the way. Cheers…

[@alexandriarogers7920]

Thank you for the kind words and advice, I really appreciate it!

[@Behappy62]

You are going to be a great mam and dad

[@alexandriarogers7920]

@@Behappy62 thank you so much :) I think every parent needs to hear kind words sometimes, and im grateful for everyone's kindness in this community. Thank you everyone :)

[@shantallj]

Growing up I identified with several of these dysfunctions. I am 50 years old and I am still affected by it. I vowed to change the narrative with my children so they would not identify with my past disfunctions 💔

[@eniss1182]

I’m literally crying right now because every single point mentioned is something both my sister and I faced growing up to a more extreme degree than I’m often capable of admitting even to just myself. Thank you for these cute little videos that cover such important ideas with such kind and calm language in addition to the cute style of animation.

[@Wishing_Star777]

Your not alone it tears me up for my brother and I my dad uses fear to control everyone

[@Tarrzan]

Silence and isolation is a BIG one for me and my family. I have two parents and an older brother and little sister. We reside far away from our relatives, and when they do come visit us, my brother and sister isolate themselves in their room. In the household, we all pretty much do our own thing and barely speak to one another. I’m the outgoing one in the family that my parents relied on. But I don’t think they see that their parenting has made my brother and sister any better, nor are they capable of pulling themself together. A lot of confusion and miscommunication. It’s quite saddening and frustrating for me.

[@CashEmOutRobb]

It's almost as if were trapped in families we don't belong in somewhere between those lines

[@nikolatesla7077]

@@CashEmOutRobb when did the idea of family emerge in humans in the first place was it still kept as high regard in medieval ages

[@mael_neves]

Growing up with my parents I have learned that lying is the saver option

[@starcloister4651]

For me it was the fear. I would hide my interests from my family because if I was interested in something they didn't like or approve of, they would make fun of me or yell at me. Like if a show was deemed too silly or juvenile for their tastes, or if an interest was deemed not respectable (like when I told them I wanted to develop video games for a living). Sometimes I'd be watching my favorite shows in secret and my heart would be racing because I'd be so worried they'd come in my room and see what was on.

[@Styrofoam_Mannequin27]

You hide interest? I hide my feelings

[@DivaCoconut]

As a girl growing up in a disfunctional family and living out of fear from my "father" is never easy and I'm scared to even do anything in case it annoys him or makes him shout over the small inconveniences, I don't wanna blame my mental health on him but he's definitely the catalyst on why I'm so introverted and i lash out when things get stressful, I don't see him as a father figure as he's given me no reason to see him as one, and once I've gotten older to where I realise what things are, this is not what a family should be like a house gripped with tension and fear because of him

[@vasileosk.7203]

My dad used to roundhouse kick me when I was young and I made him mad. I returned the favor when I was 15 breaking his jaw. We never had an argument since. This is how you fix a dysfunctional family.

[@PedanticMandi]

Roadhouse

[@miaaaaaaaaaa219]

Did you go to to prison or get a Criminal record?

[@monty9132]

🤣🤣🤣

[@DreamyWorld19]

Friendly remind that NEGLECT CAN BE EMOTIONAL ALSO! Similar to the "Silence" point made in this video, a parent can be neglectful by not caring about their child. Not spending time with them, not talking to them or having interest in their lives. Not remembering facts about their kids, like their age and what grade they're in. It's still abuse, even if it's not as obvious.

[@aabbee-u6k]

I used to think I live in a dysfunctional family, and am a victim of abuse, but thank you for correcting my world view and making me realise I'm just victimising myself! I'm grateful, since who knows what would happen if this kept on

[@christiankallio8586]

Thank you for all your videos on dysfunctional/abusive parents like this one. It makes me feel like I'm not alone and someone know how I feel and what I'm going through. I feel like I'm trapped in a prison and the door is wide open but I can't escape. I'm 25 working full time with the goal to earn and save enough money to move out, and I'm scared to move out. I feel like I won't be able to survive financially. Mentally and physically I feel I'm fine with my money situation is what scares me.

[@Wishing_Star777]

Same here ❤

[@angelodemonification]

This made so much sense. Thankyou. I have struggled with the silent treatment part and it's been so difficult to put it in words what the problem is. Even now I don't think my parents get the point. But I have turned out to be a healthier adult than what I had imagined myself to be and I'm happy with my growth. I hope this clarity will help me form healthier bonds with my children.

[@dripz628]

For me it's not my family dynamic, it's the father-son dynamic. He is never abusive or neglectful, but he applies to everything you said in the video (except neglect). My small problems don't really matter anyway because other people have faced real abuse and neglect (including my Dad).

[@Withlove_anie]

hii, u r right there are people who have faced “real abuse” and “neglect” but it doesnt your problems are any smaller. YOU ARE VALID :)))))

[@splash6133]

I have some of the same problems with my dad, especially fear and silence. I can never speak up even when my dad is doing something wrong or else he’s gonna “get mad and punish me” according to my mother. I can’t look him in the eyes most of the time. Our conversations are more like lectures, because he’s the one talking and I’m the one listening. Whenever we “talk”, he always points out something negative: “You should start your skincare routine, your face has gotten really bad” (I had started my skincare routine 3 months prior to that; I already had really low self esteem about how I looked), “you should cut your hair, it looks horrible” (I’m a guy, and my hair is about down to my lips, but I put it back of course. I personally think it looks better than my short hair that I had before), “you don’t work hard enough” (this was probably the most hurtful one to hear. It really broke me). He’s said and done a lot of other things but I can’t list them all here. I could never and will never speak up about my mental health problems since he’s the cause of the majority of them. I think it’s because he has no emotional intelligence; he can’t tell how his actions and words could possibly effect other people in a negative way.

[@ladder3257]

That's real neglect and abuse. It hurts. So sorry.

[@ladder3257]

@Nirus banyu Get a life you doughnut

[@goqailysm]

@@Withlove_anie "real abuse" I think you meant physical abuse. every abuse type is still abuse

[@randomlymadeanimations52]

And some parents wonder why their kids don’t feel comfortable around them-

[@spacegirl226]

The parents don't wonder. They don't care. That's what I've learned in four decades of abuse and neglect. They are perfect, they've never ever ever ever done anything wrong, and you are the problem.

[@arielm1374]

You know, it truly is a miracle that I've made it into my mid 20's. To this day, people say I'm very mature for my age but really it's just all the trauma and dysfunction.

[@hiitsme5524]

My family shows all of these signs. Unless there's guests at home. It's like they're completely different people. It never fails to surprise me how great they are at acting, they could've been in cinemas lmao

[@zadock6370]

It means they aren't idiots. It goes to show that they know what they are doing to you is wrong, but they do it anyway. It shows they know how to manipulate and abuse you without getting caught.

[@Wishing_Star777]

Exactly that’s my family too when my grandma came to visit she was the peace keeper but when it’s my family and I all hell breaks loose. They definitely made my brother and I co-depended it’s like being Peter Pan never able to grow up.

[@antoinebguitar2869]

Bruh, exact same. When we had visit we looked like the most happy family. Chrismas times on Facebook photos n shit, but when people were gone my step father could be screaming at my one of us for whatever stupid reason he felt getting mad about lol. So hypocritical lol.

[@AlfredoGarcia-k3f]

Exactly

[@Fabianifesinachi]

Fr

[@TheLeah2344]

My mom was abusive to me and I feared her. I was afraid of making mistakes because she would scream at me, take away my things, and physically beat me. I’m in therapy now and as an adult our relationship is better now but I still fear making mistakes and I’m scared when people yell at me thinking they will harm me.

[@charlie-yp2oq]

Yo same, I'm sorry that happened to you, but I relate to that

[@indonesiakid1396]

@Sista Rahman Shut up

[@negritaamara4216]

I’m so sorry you had to go through that, so happy you have access to therapy! I hope the treatment will help u along the way!!

[@justsomegirlwithamoustache]

Same but I'm healing hope u do too

[@indonesiakid1396]

@Nirus banyu STOP THESE BOTS

[@En4cer2K9]

Silence and isolation were/are my family dynamics. We all lived together as individuals. We didn't talk much because my dad wouldn't allow open conversation. We kept to ourselves as best as we could, just to try to keep the peace. And then we didn't have any social connections outside of the family, either. I struggled with poor social skills for a LONG time.

[@phantomvampyressshadowkiss4690]

Wow sounds like my husband's mom. They weren't allowed to tell her anything negative she does or how she makes them feel if it's bad

[@Wishing_Star777]

Same here I always have social anxiety

[@amberjohnson4820]

These families do not put the FUN in dysfunctional. Neglect of a child’s feelings over a parent’s alcoholism because of severe codependency is one of the most rotten feelings in the world. It’s just cruel. Knowing families who have this dynamic make me sad.

[@woopahtroopah8726]

My dad used to beat me,he said i deserved to die,he allways told me that i wasn't a good kid, he never told me i was special and one day when we haved a car crash i was literally diying and he just said "i wish you die,you don't deserve to be here anymore" ,after that years i just don't feel i can be able to do nothing by myself,that's why i love this channel,i can feel the love that my dad dosen't gived to me when i was a child...

[@pinkyssj4]

I remember venting my situation to my friends, they all gas lit me that I was exaggerating, that my parents were probably not as bad as I've portrayed. I distanced myself from everyone and kept this all inside until I was able to move out. I don't trust anyone as no one helped, not even those I thought were friends. The feeling of betrayal and loneliness hurts. To this day, I disassociate and am detached from people, a zombie working to pay the bills without motivation. If someone tells you their pain, believe them... the betrayal is ever lasting.

[@DocLantern85]

3:35, that image, that's me. That WAS me. My parents were very self-contained and never really interacted with anyone, aside from a few of my dad's friends. I was never allowed to walk the half a block to the local library until I was 14. That image though. Not having anyone to talk to, having no real friends, being alone for seven years. They said that I had to get myself out of the house without ANY help from them, but my mother kept fighting me every step of the way, intentionally making me feel miserable. I'm away from that now, but that image haunts me.

[@egx161]

In my neighborhood, growing up, there was family dysfunction everywhere. Looking back now, I can now see just how dysfunctional things were. Thank goodness for grandparents.

[@cherrybombtok7813]

Honestly this channel has helped me so much. You guys are incredible 💓

[@drinasun6984]

I'm very lucky to have a loving family.

[@michellewall6748]

Yes you are…. Wonderful…lucky you…😁😁😁

[@CanonicallyAGuy]

I'm so glad you put out videos like these, I'm trying to be a role model for my two little cousins, as well as figure out my own family dynamic. Unfortunately, I had guessed it was toxic for a few years now and it has been confirmed on many occasions. But I hope to keep learning from videos like these and physcology class

[@brandonespinoza9279]

I have a lot of dysfunction as my siblings are the worst part, as one is telling me to go die, and the other is being rebelliously defiant, to where I may not go out, that I had no wrongdoing on my part, which I called her out on it, while in my bedroom, as I only needed to keep my confrontation firm, yet brief.

[@demispectra9783]

Since i started being more aware of how things should be, I noticed that no, yelling at your child is not normal behaviour and yet because of my mother and the way she treated me when I was a kid I've grown to hate anger and when I got my new group of friends I finally was able to not run away from her yelling but face it. Yet she stills insists its her way of "letting the stress out" and whenever I bring up just a small request of "please don't yell" she starts to go to things like "oh so I am a bad mother" and then gives me silent treatment to the time I apologize to her. Its still a lot better than before. In the past she was always against me being interested in Japanese culture. Always told me that "its stupid, why am I interested in asians, she never was" but in the end she accepted it. Everyone has their flaws and thats okay. However I don't EVER wish even upon my enemy to be yelled at almost everyday, all the time.

[@BluClair]

I had to isolate myself for so long in my life that it made covid pandemic lockdown look like a minor issue for me.

[@tmoneydamaster20]

I was holding out hope that my parents are just strict but now that hope is gone :( They yell at me and i can't trust them with any of my feeling in fear that it'll get dismissed.

[@boxedart7075]

i listen to this during homework. your voice is so calming :)

[@mijadreams3486]

i will never forgive my parents for sending me away and being horrible hot and cold drunk parents making me have a horrible time tryingbto find love and friendship in modern life

[@involuntarilycelebrate]

My family is very dysfunctional, has all these symptoms. Once I accepted it, I was able to let go, estrange myself, and now I live a happy life!

[@dearmrfrodo]

Every second of the video is literally my life.

[@deasyastarr]

Emotional neglect, and silent treatment and isolation. They weren’t extreme but it still happened. My material needs were met and my emotional needs were met every once in a while but I’ve learned to keep my emotions to myself and was blamed that I didn’t speak up about my bouts of depression. My mom would go silent if I’ve embarrassed the family in some way. But we pretty much all lived separate lives in our rooms not really communicating, my dad was always either working or watching tv. And we never had company like ever, family lives out of state so they’d come to visit 1-2 times a year. And it got to a point where I stopped asking if friends could come over because they’d always make up some excuse as to why they couldn’t come.

[@ira_stay26]

*Me and my friend after watching this* Friend: I only have 2/5. You might have it better than me to be honest. But how many did you get out of five? Me: *trying to hold back tears* 5/5... Friend: Can you afford a therapist? Me: *Still holding back tears* They only look after my sister and brother. They never cared about my needs. Friend: *gives me a hug* ....I had no idea you were going through this pain. Me: It's okay....*in tears* my grandma once told me, "it's sometimes not the light that pulls you forward to the end of the tunnel, but it's the darkness pushing you to get there."

[@Emonachos1182]

"Do you ever wish you had a different family" *wish? I DREAM of it*

[@Dnise]

3 of the 5, I am always afraid to tell my mother to get bad grades because she yells at me or says hurtful things to me and sometimes it seems that I do not exist for my father, adding that they constantly argue and I have to listen to them because there is no other place where I can go, but what is affecting me the most is that my mother tells me her problems with my father, literally she has been telling me since I was a child, this last one is the worst because I end up worrying about problems that are not mine besides i'm starting to get paranoid

[@StephanieRZ]

There should be (if there isn't one already) a follow-up video of this on ways to heal these said 5 signs as well.

[@smilingcrow756]

Good video! As I watched, I considered the Disney movie Encanto. A therapist posted a video about the individual family members' dynamics in the movie mirroring real dynamics in psychology (the strong one, the perfect child, the gossip, the goofball, etc.) so it's interesting to watch this and consider the deeper aspects of family dysfunction and dynamics.

[@LiminalMinds.]

My father spends all of his time on his phone or at the gym. And he nags on me about being thin like it's a bad thing,aswell as saying I'm on my phone too much. Whenever I say something to stand up to him,he acts miserable,saying he's not worthy to be a father and other crap. Then you have my mom,who is also affected by this,but in turn,she sometimes snaps at me. Sometimes I wish I could just move away,get out of here.

[@caitlynstinger2585]

Omg, sounds like my family! I'm living with my grandma now, and going to therapy! I feel so much better!

[@FreakyOverhaul]

My entire my family hates each other. Which makes me wanna isolate myself away from everybody. The only people I can trust is my mom and her side of the family. My dad's side of the family is stupid and dumb, and they get violent with each other most of the time. My cousins are alright but they're spoiled brats so I dont really talk to them as much anymore.

[@AprilMayx0]

My dad gave me the silent treatment for 6 months, we live in the same house it was sooo awkward. He called my mum to get my brother to meet him from the hospital or day and I decided to go with him to talk to him & best believe he STILL would not talk to me. Ugh!

[@helmetmcbaron]

We all just sit in are rooms separate XD it's like we're all roommates just people that share the same house 😂

[@cassandrajoiner9933]

I don't think it's funny. I think it's the pivotal problem of the 21st century. I, and more people than ever before, feel increasingly isolated.

[@helmetmcbaron]

@@cassandrajoiner9933 true we have everything we need in our rooms so their is no need to go anywhere else but like the kitchen I don't even enter most rooms in the house anymore I have no reason to

[@RandomlyRandy..]

Psych2go: Seek help from a therapist Parents: Mental health issues aren’t real

[@dudemanthedude]

oof

[@q.q958]

My mum always use money to manipulate me and my younger brother. I was spoilt but I got over it. Disciplining my brother is quite hard, but he is changing. I tend to hang out with my dad more so we communicate easily, but me and my mum started hanging out more often. To people who are not living the best life out there, I suggest you to seek for help. Always remember you are not alone ❤️

[@NathalieLazo]

Extraordinary person reading this, you are not define by your circumstance or your past. It’s not what happened to you that determines your success in life; it is how you deal with those circumstances that determines your success in life! You are strong, you are capable and practice forgiveness (Forgiveness is for you) and gratitude everyday. This will change the course of your life forever! Love you always and I believe in you wholeheartedly ✨❤️ - Nat

[@strawbunnies]

I wish I could just take all the kids who are feeling all of these and adopt them as my own. I’m 24 and i still feel the effects that this abuse has done. No child deserves to be in a home where this happens.

[@iceiseverythingasmr6289]

You difinately upload this at the right time...

[@shortTrumpet592]

"Have you ever tried to hide things from their parents?" Me: I- Heh... Is That.... Not normal? "Sometimes they won't even know if their kids have eaten." Me: Wha- Why did I relate to 4/5 of these...

[@miao1272]

My family have all of this symptoms. Talking or sharing feelings with friend nor other people equals argument and being seek as destroying the family's reputation.

[@deege376]

Isolation is way too accurate. Vented to a family member outside immediate family and someone in my immediate family said there was going to be a “major cutoff” if I did that again. I choose not to be around family/have cut some of them off bc some of them give me major anxiety when they call. Shit like this is why I need a therapist

[@mercuryshusbandfr]

I can get very afraid of my dad. I really can’t tell him because he’ll make me feel guilty for saying it. He took away my phone, iPad and basically anything that makes me happy for a week one time.

[@bhumikaroy2739]

Are you Ok? Why did he take away your phone and iPad?

[@jannatsparadise8403]

Legit happens with me all the time too-😔

[@Nemesays-v6o]

I hadn't even been 2 mins thru the vid and everything said was SCARILY and PAINFULLY accurate especially being through some of these dynamics myself thanks psy2go for showing this

[@Frost_Daddy]

If I'm being honest, this video hits home better than most of your videos I have seen so far. My family dynamic currently is a mix between fear and silence. well it's mostly between my mom

[@josiemukeli3584]

Nice video... related to fear since my father was violent towards his kids by using physical abuse as a way of discipline even when I was 20 and it destroyed our bond making both us live in silence hence I isolate myself in my room for the most part 😭...but one day I'll move out

[@Danrod_]

What I believe is the cause of this feeling of forever sadness is the fact that my family wants to send me away because they think im useless and a failure,

[@dominiquelemon7125]

My parents did all of these things my whole 22 life 😢😞

[@indonesiakid1396]

@Sista Rahman SHUT UP THIS IS THERAPY VIDEO NOT A KINK VIDEO

[@Wishing_Star777]

My family did all this worse since I was 28 and now I am 33 my father uses fear to control my brother and I especially to me cause he can’t control his anger used to punish me with physical abuse 😢

[@dominiquelemon7125]

@@Wishing_Star777 oh wow.

[@student1754]

The only sign of a dysfunctional family unit is all these relationship videos. Dating at an early age breaks the family unit. This they are hiding from you.

[@OrigamiAhsoka]

Raise your hand if you severely misunderstood the thumbnail 💀

[@SmiIeyyXD]

My parents do about all of these things.

[@ritaaaaaaa]

yeahh

[@hi-ud2zg]

i don't think it's possible that they're neglecting you and overcaring for you at the same time

[@MissFirenze1]

I'd apply some of these to my 'father', he was an absent parent that made excuses for his actions rather than taking accountability for them.

[@AmyyWx]

This is so triggering for me. I grew up thinking all of this was normal until I finally moved out. Only now I’m starting to work through the issues and resentment I have for my mother who created a household like this

[@jansenc5476]

it's surprisingly relatable, especially "codependency" & "fear". I knew it's weird to think that i " love" my parent, but i know what they are. I don't even realize that "fear" is one of them, i mean kind of wrong but yeah. Still, i try to think some of possibilities. Maybe that's why i still live with them. Kind of manipulating.

[@mig2cool982]

Lol I have everything to hide it feels like. It’s hard to trust and open up. I can’t articulate everything but at the end of the day I just wish I can be a smart caring loving person with having overcome drama as well.

[@mariaalforque6430]

Children are more mature than parents. I knew that exactly since I was 5 yrs old. I just observed them all. When they talked to you, they think you are dog 🐕 and no emotion s. How they could do this to their children. I sometimes think that I should not been born. So sad childhood. It ruined my entire life 😪. Thank you for this video

[@v_erdant889]

My family shows 4/5 of these signs. We fight after dinner 3/7 times a week and often times someone walks away hurt or crying. It's causing erosion on all of our emotional pipes, but my brothers pipes are getting a lot of build up. I fear that one day he might snap and there will be blood..

[@sumeyrateke]

My family. I’m 27, and I’ve been verbalizing and acting upon a plan to move out. But ofc to that they always react as if I’m doing this to hurt them in some way.

[@JenGable-Justeson]

This video is so true and each form is detrimental.

[@CitrineFaeryFire]

Exactly like my family. My mom wouldn't feed us so we starved and we were always in survival mode. I learned to never ask for anything because it was all about her and how poor we were.

[@caydi-bug9492]

the first one is so accurate for me. I’m afraid to tell my mother anything because I’m afraid I will get grounded and punished for speaking how I feel towards her. I’ve gotten in trouble a lot for not doing what she says and she often “jokes” about me being a rebel, even though I am the old person who actually listens to her.

[@caydi-bug9492]

i am a teen too, my mother won’t let me to teen things. all I have been doing is being cooped up all day. I just study and study.

[@caydi-bug9492]

she needs to understand that it’s my life and not hers, and I could do better then she did when she was my age. my mom went through a lot when she was my age.

[@thecatdragon589]

when i was first told about dysfunctional families, it shone out to me like a light. it was a "somewhat extreme example" and fit my family perfectly. and even uears after finding this out, theres dtill thibgs i struggle to understand isnt nornal.

[@itshuntress6131]

I am ashamed to say I fear my parents. I do struggle with silence, but I am open to my brother. This message helped me. Thank you.

[@toasty1079]

Ah yes I have 4 out of the 5 of these That isn't a good thing but like damn.. Whenever I watch the videos I don't k ow why it feels like someone is reaching out to help me, I don't know why but man it hits me on the feels ;-;

[@asasial1977]

Far to many who grew up in a dysfunctional family, will go on to have their own dysfunctional family because that is all they know, or they flat out ignore all the issues their family caused and do the same exact thing to their children. It is disgusting

[@YouTubeChannel-ru8ed]

My family shows two of these and honestly it’s crazy to see that this is actually not healthy

[@oop5488]

Ah shit I recognize the fear. My mom isn’t the most patient with things. I’m scared to do something out of the fear she’ll yell at me and I can tell if I’ll get yelled at sometime that day from the moment I wake up. I like being home alone so I can clean without being yelled at about not doing it correctly, too slow, or too fast. If I’m confused on things it’s like a 50/50 chance I’ll get it wrong and be yelled at. It’s like eggshells around her. When ever my sister comes home to visit I mentally prepare for an argument because of how often they’ve become. She also doesn’t get my depression. She doesn’t get why I have it when I have nice things and parents and it makes me feel like I have to go through a very troubled life just to have a valid reason. She also threatened to take my phone away cause apparently whatever I’m doing on it makes me depressed and she lowkey blamed my girlfriend for the “influence” It took a lot of confidence to actually tell her about my depression with support from my therapist, and for her to just dismiss it made me feel awful, so I don’t tell her about my mental health anymore

[@oltzu5206]

That fear thing was very relatable

[@Dinahsour]

The hardest part is I don't know what to do to fix all of this. I know the only way to actually be happy is to leave but I am too young and I don't know where to go, I wasn't allowed to go out so I don't have friends, my family was never close to other members of our family so I can't go to them but day by day I feel worse and worse and my father is getting older and his temper is getting worse, I am doing my best to make money to leave one day with a channel and showing others how to draw but even if I do reach my goal for money I don't know where to go. And I am scared to stay but I am scared to leave.

[@ThePortalTheory]

Beautiful thank you!

[@Skinterwin]

Oh wow, I knew it. How bad is to have all the signs checked

[@oORegularKevOo]

3:49 Facts. As long as you hold yourself accountable for yourself and make an exit plan. If you are dealing with narcissist keep your plans to yourself because they will try to sabotage you.

[@Palak2004-pb4]

Hello your content helps a lot keep growing

[@chara2416]

Honestly as an Indian person, all these considered "dysfunctional" things were the norm for me, I am slowly starting to realize how toxic it really is, but I still have no way to do something about it, I just hope that this is over soon, and to anyone reading this. You are a beautiful and amazing person, who deserves love and care, things can seem daunting at times, but that's just how life it is, life will pose problems, sometimes even during periods when we are children, and are just learning how the world works, but keep pushing on and trying to face it, it will be fine one day. Don't be afraid to ask for help too, its no shame to build something beautiful with guidance, but it is regretful and painful to build something without experience, and then see it crumble. I hope everyone here has a good day, and thank you so much for taking the time to read my comment^^. Stay hydrate, eat properly and show the world what you are made of!

[@sanadhooper37]

The worst part is when you realize almost for every indian family this is a normal thing......and it is named as 'tough love'😥

[@viveksaxena1821]

:D

[@BartSimpson-lr8vz]

My dad: (Yells at me for not being more independent) Also my dad: (Doesn't let me do anything on my own)

[@Uh_Ohhh]

Thank you so much for creating a video on this topic I have been waiting for this 😅❤️

[@NicecutGexe]

Bruh I passed by and saw the thumbnail and was so thrown off cuz I was lost thinking what is was until I noticed it was eyes being covered and a shush not what s**t I was thinking about

[@PedroFerro1000]

Damn, this video was almost like a checklist for me. Since I was a child, I was afraid to go home. It never felt safe there because of my parents. While my father made me feel small and stupid, my mum was always trying to control me. And both gave me the silence treatment many times. Shit, I'm already 20 and I'm still afraid to call for help. Idk, I think this video gave me a little more courage to seek for help.

[@princessmarlena1359]

Fear and Neglect for me. Our parents didn’t notice me or my siblings except to yell at us.

[@danmarieaicah]

It's true that I sometimes wish I ran away that day, but I can't for the fear of my little sister having the same trauma that I have from our parents. I chose that I'll be there to guide her correctly and protect her. Although I can't always be that person and I might run away but I hope before I do that my little sister knows what our parents are doing wrong to us.

[@ivycantthinkofaname4303]

The fear one reminds me of my dad. Both my mom and I are afraid of him; and sometimes he shouts at me for not standing up fast enough. He often yells at me and counts down from 3 when that happens, which is a serious trigger for me, seriously, when he yells at me I freeze and don't move and/or cry and do nothing. And then my mom is telling me to just stand up and he'll stop, but I usually just keep crying, making it escalate further and further. He sometimes threatens to take my devices away as well. This is why my mom and I have kind of been... Avoiding him more than usual. Not talking to him that much if we don't have to. If we can tell he's in a good mood, we'll gladly talk to him. Otherwise, my mom and I describe it as walking on eggshells around him. Sorry for the long paragraph; I just wanted to vent

[@tobias7923]

This sound like me, haha. Cuz i usually isolate myself, avoid myself from helping anyone, hiding lots of things from everyone, and didn't talk at all