6 Signs You Have Victim Mentality, Not Taking Responsibility

[@vinnzouiyt]

0:54 learned helplessness 1:31 false proof of anger 2:04 unrealistic expectations 2:37 over-explaining yourself 3:11 negative outlook 3:47 not coping with stress

[@Psych2go]

Quick with the timestaps! Thanks!

[@barbaraa9362]

Most victims are believe it or not actually traumatized they could have grown up being sexually physically or physically abused. Learned helplessness comes from living for years without any way or means no help is coming. Maybe they had to hide while their father beat their mom. Or they told someone about the abuse and it continued. What proof does a child have? It wasn’t until I had hand marks around my neck and went to the police in middle school before anyone listened to me. Once kids found out they were more likely cruel to me than kind. I think as adults we have good reason to over explain because you don’t get it. I am doing it right now and it is called defending a victim rather than convincing how many more people into victim blaming. The only unrealistic people are the ones who have such ridiculous and simplistic opinions that have never been held down and repeatedly abused.You would call a man in a wheelchair victim personality but a sexual assault victim is a good way to self sooth a nation that lives and thrives around sexual abuse for entertainment. 60,000 women and little girls were burned at the stake for Flying on brooms and having sex with Satan! How Absurd is that, how about if men had to prove take a picture of it? How about a law for women and little girls that fly around on brooms? And Satan? Is that abuse? Or do you believe an evil spirit put the bruises on their bodies and sexually assaulted them? It would be refreshing if you did something helpful like instead of having the child/adult have to make you feel good so your unrealistic expectation of everything is rainbows and sunshine to get yourself dirty, hop in the trenches of hopelessness with all of those children and maybe you will realize Satan isn’t some magical incarnation. Let me know when you walk into a psychiatric office and see all men getting help, instead of men’s victims. If you truly care about helping people stop blaming the victims and saying it’s a choice because psychiatric hospitals wouldn’t exist without victims. If you fixed the truly sick people your waiting room would be filled with Karen’s and Donald and Jeffries. Not brave souls who have to over explain themselves for the 100th time knowing it’s as useless as hope.

[@vinnzouiyt]

@@Psych2go Of course!

[@noonegirl]

Thank you 😊

[@youtubegm8256]

@@Psych2goI have a kind of loaded question if it's ok, and I know you won't be able to entirely answer since there's a lot of different details and context missing. I used to be like this a lot, but I feel like I've improved. Now I'm a bit much of a people pleaser, and maybe over criticize myself, so I'm glad to have other people's perspective on these things because it's been really enlightening and useful. My sister unfortunately has a very strong victim mentality, and narcissism. I don't blame her remotely for the circumstances that created it because she's dealt with a lot of trauma and criticism, but she also has to learn she needs to change to have a better life. I'm hoping to inform her on this as best as I can in a way that's not demeaning. Do you think sharing this video with her and explaining my thinking would be beneficial to her?

[@neofulcrum5013]

I’ve taken the fall for my own mistakes but other times, I genuinely feel like the world has it out for me. It’s sometimes ridiculous.

[@Psych2go]

Absolutely. I don't think it's necessarily a victim mentality when, from time to time, it feels like the world is against us. But we are considered to have a victim mentality when we continue to blame others for every little thing that goes wrong in our lives.

[@Orech-the-Nut]

And what if I think everything is my fault? And blame myself of every little thing so I get stuck? This leads to the point, when I cannot decide, because I overthink every possibility, how things can go wrong and how people might feel….and to the exhaustion.

[@allways8782]

​@@Orech-the-NutHello, I definitely sounds like the result of unhealed childhood trauma. You got the program implanted in you as a child that you're responsible for or you're the blame for anything that goes wrong.💓

[@Orech-the-Nut]

@@allways8782 thanks, allready in therapy for years, in case you were afraid. Not a case of a childhoodtrauma. Please, do not give me (or other people) diagnose via internet (if you are mental health professional, you know why ;) Every thing in psychology can have many different reasons. I am just asking here about the mechanism, if this is known, not about the exact reason in my case. @psych2go

[@gentlenoob2576]

I ignored the world if you don’t interact with it it doesn’t interact with you

[@ocalimirosubso]

I'm pretty sure I have a victim mentality, I've lost a lot of friends and I'm seen as sensitive and taking everything personally all the time. And I also constantly ask for reassurance that people aren't mad at me and/or upset by something I said or did: I always look back at situations in every single detail to check for something I might've done or said wrong. It's overwhelming and I just want a normal social circle but I can't get rid of this mentality.

[@pc_hmk2204]

Also watch if your parents always saying negative things about people or not. It also makes us thing world is danger sometimes.

[@turtlesandmoreturtles]

don't let yourself become a victim of victim mentality, you can get rid of it and your life will be better for it. You must believe you can free yourself.

[@prnc96]

You have a victim mentality when you blame others for everything not yourself. If you need reassurance that YOU didn't upset people that's not blaming others that's blaming yourself.

[@GuidetteExpert]

Therapy helped me because everyone that has this victim mentality was a victim in the past were there was now where out.

[@MorelloZzT7]

​@@GamutifcI think superpower isn't exactly the right word to describe that but .....

[@artis_1001]

I had to address this with myself recently because I noticed that I was casually avoiding responsibility for my actions in different situations. So glad you all found it necessary to make this video. A lot of people need to come to terms with having a victim mentality

[@AbrahamPalmer-wj5cb]

Exactly tbh is a epidemic nowadays to have a victim mentality

[@graysontan507]

This is literally me

[@ryanfoster2869]

I used to believe I had a victim mentality. Then I discovered that all the people accusing me of this WERE actually hurting me as I had long suspected. Like my relatives stealing money that was left over after my mother died. That's just one example but the amount of gaslighting I've experienced and uncovered in hindsight has been staggering. Interestingly enough, the people that accused me of having a victim mentality displayed all the signs of it you detailed in this video.

[@kosycat1]

same.

[@JROC2112]

I was recently accused of this by a relative after another relative went on a smear campaign about me because I refused to bow down to them and put up with their abusive control. One of the biggest lessons I've learned in my life is that toxic people should be cut off at the earliest opportunity. Thanks for sharing your experience there. Look after yourself ❤

[@sunbeam9222]

And so what did you do to empower yourself. I noticed people with a victim mentality talk about others in active form and talk about themselves in passive form. It's all about what others did and how they got treated, what other did and how they felt. I hardly ever hear about what they do/ did themselves. Always others acting and the victim on the receiving hand.

[@blankearth5840]

@@sunbeam9222I think it’s because they have been traumatized by a hurtful experience or outcome and because of that their mind can’t stop spiraling and ruminating over what happened and how they were treated, so they can’t help but talk about it and seek reassurance.

[@moreliatapoc971]

0:53 Learned helplessness 1:32 False proof of anger 2:04 Unrealistic expectations 2:37 Over-explaining yourself 3:10 Negative outlook 3:47 Not coping with stress

[@Psych2go]

Appreciate the timestamps!

[@moreliatapoc971]

@@Psych2go thank you very much✨ your videos are very helpful tbh, keep it up❤️

[@aquapr901]

Be aware that some people might gaslight you into thinking that you're "playing the victim" when in reality they are actually hurting and abusing you and you are simply expressing what's upsetting you

[@Imperial_Lizardgirl]

Now I have no idea.

[@anthonyinsani9914]

No doubt

[@I_am_N0body]

That is a problem with people. They can’t see actions have consequences even if you didn’t do a damn thing to contribute.

[@CYSYS8993]

"It's like they're invalidating our feelings and belittling our struggles." That's because they are.

[@KingOfRubberDucks]

0:00 Intro 0:53 Learned Helplessness 1:31 False Proof Of Anger 2:05 Unrealistic Expectations 2:37 Over-Explaining Yourself 3:10 Negative Outlook 3:47 Not Coping With Stress 4:30 Outro

[@Psych2go]

Thank you for the quick time stamps!

[@eun371]

I dated someone with a victim mentality, safe to say it was the hardest experience i have ever gone through, but it helped me learn that I suffered from codependency.

[@sanparuzu]

While I can understand this - what if you really were seriously mentally abused and such. I tend to over explain myself in conflict due to a toxic relationship where I was like was constantly verbally abused and accused of things. And now I've developed a tactic of over explaining that ways I'm not misunderstood

[@prnc96]

Same I think these points can also be misinterpreted for something else. If you simply have depression you also can't cope with stress and feel like the world is just bad.

[@Derrekkorh]

No I get that. Especially! When they say mean things about you when your being straightforward and honest.

[@ct6852]

That's what they want unfortunately. They'll literally misunderstand you on purpose to put you on the defensive.

[@christinacreates2393]

Then go to therapy!!!! The mindset forms as a result of trauma. Just because you WERE a victim doesn’t mean you’re perpetually a victim.

[@sanparuzu]

@@christinacreates2393 trust years of ongoing therapy to undo what was done. Never ending process and certainly not a victim. Wiser at best and love myself enough to know when to get out

[@prnc96]

Honestly I feel like these "signs" can also apply to a lot of other things...like if you're the scapegoat, got bullied for years or have abusive parents and get constantly gaslighted. Sometimes people are really just stuck in an abusive environment and finally realize what those people are doing to them.

[@danielbarrera8391]

That's what I was thinking. Some of these things I can relate to but the problem is that it feels like mostly it comes from gaslighting and scapegoating which are extremely painful. Personally, I would never tell someone something like this for a variety of reasons... This is just really bad. No one changes through "calling out" rarely at all... The only time you can really help enact change is through heartful honest conversations with someone and throwing something like this at someone you barely know is a recipe for disaster and setbacks.

[@awesomesauce7446]

​@@danielbarrera8391Victim mentality =/= Bad, Evil, Manipulative Person It is simply a mentality that can apply to anyone, healthy or not, manipulative or not. It can be the results of examples you have above, and it can be from the stereotypical Abusive Mother Who Is Never At Fault And Is The Victim Because Her Kids Never Talk To Her Now. But no matter who you are or your circumstances, the victim mentality is detrimental to your health. "Calling out" in its simplest form is just identifying the problem. And it is important to identify your problems, how else can you hope to fix them? If this video feels like it is strikingly hitting a nerve, or makes you feel extremely defensive... you most likely have a victim mentality. It would be an excellent idea to bring this up to your therapist and try to work it out. No, being dubbed a person with victim mentality isn't an indictment of being a terrible person, it's just that social media loves using the phrase for bad people because it sounds Fancy and Smart and therefore makes them look and feel more intelligent, mostly because they are looking for validation that they ARE studious and intelligent when it comes to MH. But they are using the word/phenomena too loosely, so now p much the entire general public equates "victim mentality" with "evil person." It is not. It is simply a dynamic that can be found in all people. But you DO have to point it out to those that must hear it. Not because they want to hear it, because they NEED to hear it. For those people that are TRULY those "evil" people that the general public creates as a strawman, they get a reality check that their manipulative behavior is not going unnoticed, and that shakes their confidence to continue furthur manipulation. For the literal ENTIRE REST OF THE POPULATION that suffers from victim mentality, it is the starting point towards healing that particular dynamic of themselves, because, like this video states, the victim mentality leads to a stressful, rougher life, that continuously errodes self confidence and promotes self hate, which easily strolls into depression, which easily will slide into suicide. Again, if this video made you feel "called out" or extremely defensive, this is not a bad thing. No one here is calling you a bad person or "evil," like general public social media kooks have normalized. Ignore them. All they love to do is spread false information on MH and find every way possible to demonize MH symptoms all while PRETENDING to "spread awareness." They are wrong. What matters the most here is, we can help identify a problem here, and due to identification, proceed to get help on it. But don't be afraid to "call out" someone on suffering a victim mentality, that is not the kindness you believe it to be. And, I KNOW it's hard, I know, I have rejection sensitive dysphoria and have spent YEARS, well over a decade, learning how to cope, and I still struggle - but do everything in your power not to take the info the wrong way/too personally. I know. Trust me, I know, it's hard, but for every moment you fight your brain that is determined to destroy you, the more power you gain over it, and you're one very important step toward recovery. Hope this helps

[@sunbeam9222]

All in passive form. That s victim mentality ( no judgment)

[@danielbarrera8391]

@@awesomesauce7446 Well I did say some of the things I can relate to so I'm not outright denying it. If anything I live with a mentality of believing everything is my fault and am constantly feeling over responsible. So when I see something like this, it immediately is taken as more proof that I'm a bad person who is making the wrong choices all the time. And no I'm not. Again, not saying I'm not considering any of it, but I constantly do take these things in and it erodes my ability to be more self loving and compassionate. Also, I wouldn't say anyone "has" a victim mentality because if anything that would reinforce the issue/problem. If you believe you "have" something then it will constantly wear down on you. I don't know. Personally, I still feel it's best to just recognize these things as a part of being human. It's why I take issue with self help in general because they only give us more reason to hate yourself and reinforce shame and feelings of inferiority. And a lot of that shame is probably not well placed either since our society has unreal expectations of behavior and a lot of it is exacerbated by capitalism. I'm just the person who feels that as long as a person has food and shelter the rest is not my concern. As long as they are not actively out to hurt someone or themselves. I'm wondering how much this term would be spread if there were UBI and free housing. Places that have utilized that? Lower crime rates and mental health issues. Can't imagine why that would be..?

[@JustyDrawzStuff]

I know this was commented over 4 weeks ago but it just wanted to note that the video does say this: 5:09

[@mariayoung7659]

I was told I had victim mentality a while back. When I saw this video I had to see if I could relate. The main one I can relate to is over explaining myself. I've been through a lot growing up as a kid so I'm a little more sensitive with certain things. I communicate what it is that bothers me and sometimes go into great depth as to why it bothers me. Maybe it's overwhelming for other people to hear all that information. Otherwise this video was a good reminder of making sure of staying on the right track on not to play the victim.

[@ScorpioKingPlutoTriad]

Amazing job, brother. Amazing job of being self aware at what you’re doing. That’s a superpower in itself.

[@A55a551n]

Timestamps 1). Learned helplessness 0:53 2). False proof of angry 1:30 3). Unrealistic expectations 2:04 4). Over-explaining yourself 2:36 5). Negative outlook 3:10 6). Not coping with stress 3:46 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙

[@bloom7722]

woah ur fast! thankss

[@A55a551n]

​@@bloom7722thanks for the compliment 💙💙💙💙💙💙

[@Psych2go]

You never miss 😎🎯🎯

[@A55a551n]

@@Psych2go thanks for the compliment

[@amanitaocreata4401]

I can see my part in things, but at the same time the world really is antagonistic and people really are usually out yo take advantage of you for their own benefit. I try to stay alone as much as possible and keep myself out of situations, but people suck, and the world is screwed

[@sunbeam9222]

The world is nothing else then the content of our mind.

[@markbenand]

The real diving line though is your answer to the question, "can I do anything to improve my situation"? If the answer is yes, then you probably don't have a victim mentality. If the answer is no then you probably do. The biggest factor is whether or not you feel like you can do anything about your situation. Titus had a great line in his comedy show, "Get off the cross and use the wood to build a bridge and move on". Those with a victim mentality stay on the cross.

[@jagrutijadhav4580]

Elaborate please ​@@sunbeam9222

[@christinacreates2393]

Victim mindset boils down to self hate. You think everyone perceives you negatively because YOU view YOURSELF negatively. You think you have bad luck because YOU don’t believe you deserve good things.

[@VegimorphtheMovieBoy]

I think i have learned helplessness, over-explaining yourself, negative outlook, and not coping with stress (Possibly unrealistic expectations as well), but the first person I tend to blame is usually myself. I have a brain injury (possibly a mental disorder too) that tends to make understanding and doing certain things a bit harder, and I think I've unintentionally let that define me, to the point that I hate myself. Like, I've struggled for years with both job hunting and making progress on my dreams and I've sometimes worked myself up into a frustration where its like, "If I only knew how to get over this last big hump, I'll get to where I want to be!" but my mind goes blank because I have no idea what to do, and I just get mad at myself. Add on the craziness going on lately and I've just had days where I'm feeling like, "Maybe I'm just here to suffer." Trying to work past that but it's definitely not easy

[@TamagoEgg]

Blaming ownself is also a victim mentality unless you do some self reflect. Situation happens for a reason, there is nothing to blame or I should say we shouldn't blame. We should instead focus on what could have done better from the mistakes we think we could have made and change. Do we change our behavior or do we set up healthy boundary?

[@IDKWHAT2NAMETHISS]

God is to blame for everything, although im an atheist i still blame my problems on a higher power. Bro theres people who are perfect but not me? Thats gods doing i didnt ask for this shit, he purposely gave me bad genetics to prevent me from being great, i didnt ask for bad genetics. Moment something doesnt go my way its bc of god up to his usual bs again

[@christinacreates2393]

Therapy

[@VegimorphtheMovieBoy]

@@christinacreates2393Planning to soon

[@FazTheAmazz]

This video helped me realize a lot of things that I will be taking into consideration. Thank you!

[@Psych2go]

Thank you for the kind words! Which part of the video did you relate to the most?

[@FazTheAmazz]

@Psych2go Everything except for the negative outlook. I didn't realize before this video that I might have a victim mentality at all, but it makes complete sense now. I realized, too, that a parental figure of mine also probably has this mentality. I'm going to keep thinking about this, and I'll most likely bring this up with my therapist when I get a chance to next!

[@LittleArona]

As much as I relate to many of these examples, most of the time I take hold for my actions and sometimes even other’s. I also tend to overshare and feel guilty and trying to look for help in everyone around me, then feel guilty for “bothering” them or being too dramatic. I feel like when I say I’m too dramatic or that I’m bothering someone I’m victimizing myself, but it is also the truth. Any help for that?

[@PureDivineHappiness]

I relate with you. I'm thinking on this all. Really, for help. Idk. What am I doing that is limiting myself? What am I thinking that's holding myself back, what am I doing that's not creating betterment, or am I ignoring the awareness of boundaries that would be healthy for me and that I can have in others? Also maybe I should journal it instead of talk to others. Build starting with in. Trust myself. Take the time to pause. Remove the self limiting beliefs from myself. Keep respect for others that I'm hurting over. We are all different in how we think see, live lessons, and cope. Relationships are all connection. So. How am I connecting? How am I receiving? Don't let myself deplete, maintain some self regulation, self love, restore inner balance, keep that in check. So check myself. I'm glad I read your comment and wrote here. Sending love and light. Belief that can fix this. ❤ glad to watch this video. I have had hard struggles with this.

[@sunbeam9222]

Maybe before asking others for help try ( when you remember about it) to ask yourself is there a way I can first help myself with this? If not, I would go ask for help unapologetically. You make the decision, own it. If someone doesn't want to help, trust them to know how to tell you so. And that you will accept it without feeling bitter or ashamed .

[@LittleArona]

@@sunbeam9222 thank you! I’ll try. Have a pan awesome day Mk? Remember how special you are

[@camdenthompson4307]

I just read this because I've weirdly feel the same way. I've felt like I was responsible for everything and that I'm the only person who deserves to suffer because of me, that I was always the villain, and that I'm the only reason the people I care about are hurt. I eventually got kicked out of my group of friends with the only thing being told was that I was the problem like I was telling myself ( eventually I learned they just needed me to make new friends, which is a little hard when your too scared to walk to almost any public space). I wanted to make up somehow for what I've done and I still haven't fully been able to and probably made it worse. I feel as though anytime I talk or mention anything about it, I'm worried it sounds like I'm the victim and that I'm just "Some Narcissistic Psycho who deserves to shut the hell up and die" or something. heck, even as I'm typing this I feel like I'm just focusing on myself, but I'm trying to get help for it. I thought I was the only person who goes through something like this, but thank you for telling it. I don't know if there's an exact term for it. but if there is, please let me know

[@deerecoyote2040]

​@camdenthompson4307 It's genuinely the exact same thing for me.

[@RinnilleLeva]

I can relate to most stuff. I have experienced my controversies with friends and family ever since the pandemic started. It's hard for me to go away from my gadgets because it feels like people online understand me better. My parents are also declining my mental health too. i hate it so much

[@Psych2go]

Do you think the pandemic had a big impact on your mental health? Have you spoken to a mental health professional regarding this?

[@RinnilleLeva]

​@@Psych2go I feel like it probably did and there were many people changing that time too and when I ask if I can go to a mental health professional, my parents just say that I'm fine and that I just need to understand other better.

[@CountryGirl-ev7bv]

I understand how you feel. I also have toxic parents and I fit most of the points made in this video mostly because of them. I don't know where you live, but maybe with organisations like planned parenthood you can have access to free medical advice without having to tell your parents about it. You absolutely have the right to take care of yourself, not matter what others might tell you. I hope you'll look into it and that you'll feel better 😊 You are definitely not alone.

[@luisconde6201]

stinks to stink

[@KA9z0418]

Yep true facts especially when you help people out and you go ask them for help and ignore.

[@Imoenn]

Victim mentality is extremely difficult because abusive people who gaslight will use it to shift blame and shame you into being more under their control because the issue isn't them, it's you. Learned helplessness, just move out, stop being a victim, as they control your money, the only way you can move out. Don't act like you're being attacked all the time, as they constantly criticse and belittle you. Your expectations are too high, as they bully you. Stop over explaining yourself stop focusing on the past, as you realise what's going on and explain it to others who just shut you down as being "petty" and then negative outlook and stress...I mean if you've been gaslight and abused so much, this would be a very natural reaction. It's normal to think the world is evil when the very people who you are told, by them and society that they love you have made your life a nightmare and when you reached out for help, you got shamed for it and shut down. Even outside of family, taking responsibility for someones abuse done to you is what the abuser wants, they won't say they did wrong because they either can't or won't do it, they'll get you to do it so the game can continue. "You made me do X to you." "Stop being a victim." The only good thing from this is, it can wake people up to their situation and ask "Why AM I doing this?" and hopefully pull themselves out but...ergh, just something about the word "Victim mentality." doesn't sit with me.

[@KrunkCobain]

You're the problem

[@christinacreates2393]

Yes you’re definitely the problem because you refuse to take responsibility for your life. No one has power and control of you. If people mistreat you then it’s up to you to have self respect and LEAVE THEM! No matter who they are if it’s your parents LEAVE THEM…if it’s a romantic partner LEAVE THEM TOO. If they control your money go to court or call the police…take responsibility for yourself and your life. Do the hard thing!!!!

[@Theeverythingbundle]

@@christinacreates2393gurl it’s not that easy sometimes people are trapped with abusers, like if the abuse comes from a family member or if their partner has them financially trapped.

[@Theeverythingbundle]

@@christinacreates2393 and seriously quit with the caps lock and work through the issues you clearly have

[@djotchuiangela9955]

​@@christinacreates2393you really need mental help

[@vinnzouiyt]

Just realized I’m the epitome of victim mindset dang 👁️👁️

[@Psych2go]

Why do you think that you have a victim mindset?

[@vinnzouiyt]

@@Psych2go I have all the 6 signs you mentioned in the video and I feel really bad for people who had to put up with me. At that moment I felt unheard and neglected but little did I know by trying to make myself heard, I was making another person felt unheard as well.

[@AshleyEllwood]

Any personal growth in the last year, since realizing your issue?

[@rdtripler5604]

Never have I related so much to a video before. And it's this one. I think I was always self-aware of my situation, but man... It sucks have my feelings dissected and explained back to me....

[@user-11Il10I1]

I feel like the signs could also be a victim of having narcissistic parents and not having a victim mentality. I'm so confused right now.

[@HardlyRamone]

Perhaps narcissistic parents could traumatize someone into having a victim mentality that they carry into other relationships

[@GemmaJohnshat]

I have a friend who I think shows all the signs of victim mentality. It is not possible for him to leave the house without starting arguments with strangers and telling us afterwards how he put everybody in their place. From what he told me he did grow up with narcissistic parents and as the scapegoat of the family. So there may be a connection between growing up in a narcissistic household and developing a victim mentality. I think the difference between the two is that the victim mentality plays out irregardless of who you are dealing with, even with complete strangers who usually just mind their own business. The person at the fast food counter or your child's teacher normally don't have it out for you, they are just doing their job.

[@goldola1935]

People with this mindset cause drama when things don't go their way.😳

[@Glasszki]

I was worried going into this video thinking that I had a victim mentality because of what an ex-friend said. He told me that I was spewing BS about my life circumstances and that my whole life was my fault and that I need to own up to it. I had explained to him everything about my life on multiple occasions. He just wouldn't listen to me. (I never said anything like that to him about his life) I realized thanks to your guys videos that I should look into narcissism. As it turns out I think he had it, a not so violent case of it, but he was definitely suffering from it. Through some light research I've deduced that I was his narcissist supply, and when I didn't met his expectations he blew up on me. I hope he gets the help he needs and me too!

[@dinorex4105]

I'm scared this video described me so accurately

[@MxPotato84]

Sounds a lot like my ex mother. But she’s also a narcissist and constant gaslighter. Growing up with her was painfully annoying and really mentally messed me up. Im still healing from the mental and emotional damage from her.

[@RyanNerdyGamer]

My first thought before going in… this may be partly why my father is the way he is: he’s been through _a whole lot_ of BS his whole life, and likely has more than his fair share of PTSD; however, he also resorts to using it as an excuse and/or justification for taking out his frustrations on others (especially when he believes they’re out of earshot). The result is painfully ironic and hypocritical moments of him treating others in _exactly_ the same way as his victim mindset dictates, meaning he makes victims out of those around him, yet still asserts himself as the victim in every instance; he then becomes remorseful for his actions and tries to make amends (albeit in a way that keeps him the victim, and always without an apology from him). This makes it extremely draining and challenging to juggle between trying to help and comfort the guy, and keeping a safe distance and boundaries for the chance to recover from the latest incident; as a highly sensitive and empathic guy with a larger emotional threshold than most, this is a reminder that even I have limits, and deserve a chance to unpack and process traumatic experiences without having to suppress them. It feels like the only way to break the cycle and to truly help my father is to practice mindfulness and learn from his experiences; I may not be able to change his victim mentality, but I can make sure I don’t fall into the same psychological trap, and hopefully be an example for others to follow in terms of healthy ways to handle and heal from traumatic experiences. 😊

[@Cosmic-Peachie]

I have constantly made myself out to be a victim and even especially went as far as to *deny* this. I want to change that and stop making myself a victim for *good.*

[@lululemonbar9110]

You're already miles ahead of many people by acknowledging this. So many people don't admit it.

[@Cosmic-Peachie]

@@lululemonbar9110 Thanks. This is not really an easy thing to admit but I felt like I should just come here and do it.

[@flormarthas.ferreira2984]

I've met people who have endured long-term narcissistic abuse and, as a result of being immersed in this dynamic, have developed a victim mentality. This can make it difficult for them to recognize or understand what's happening, as is often the case with victims of abuse. The way the signs are presented in this video can give the impression that the victim is engaging in this behavior due to a moral failing, which is not always the case. The specific case of abuse that leads to learned helplessness should be explained step-by-step, along with the 6 signs.

[@snehasoni7]

I asked for help but no-one is here for me.I don't how many days are left in my life 😞

[@tiagoalmeida1059]

Go see a therapist, give it a try

[@squeakermcgee]

I am the opposite of this I take responsibility for everything even if I didn’t do anything wrong and say sorry to much.

[@JROC2112]

I used to do this too. The best thing I ever did was learn to identify toxic people and relationships early and cut them out completely.

[@sunbeam9222]

I don't cut people out personally, I just learned to be assertive and differenciate what I'm responsible for and what I'm not. And stick to that. People can react however they want. I don't take it personally once I know what's mine, what's theirs. ( Feelings/ behaviour).

[@deerecoyote2040]

Same here.

[@flamegamer3424]

I’ve learned to take responsibility for my actions, but there were instances where something happens around me without noticing and I get blamed for it. Or even when I try to do something in a way that was intended to be done, it can backfire at times.

[@tristandeguzman5974]

If you recognize these signs in yourself, it's important to reflect on your mindset and take steps towards personal growth and empowerment: Practice self-awareness: Recognize when you are falling into a victim mentality and consciously challenge those thoughts and beliefs. Accept responsibility: Take ownership of your actions and choices, even when things don't go as planned. Focus on what you can control and take proactive steps to make positive changes. Seek support and feedback: Surround yourself with supportive individuals who can provide honest feedback and help you gain perspective on your circumstances. Cultivate resilience: Develop resilience by reframing challenges as opportunities for growth. Focus on solutions and develop problem-solving skills to overcome obstacles. Practice gratitude: Cultivate a positive mindset by focusing on gratitude and shifting your perspective to see possibilities and opportunities. Seek professional help if needed: If you find it challenging to break free from a victim mentality, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor who can provide guidance and strategies for personal growth. Remember, changing your mindset takes time and effort. By taking responsibility for your actions and focusing on personal growth, you can shift away from a victim mentality and create a more empowered and fulfilling life.

[@flowerbloom5782]

Thxs for this. ❤

[@landonolague9564]

Watching this video gave me the strength to go get help. I start with therapy next week. Thannk you.

[@dineshsinghrawat391]

Yes I can say I am living in the victim mentality and this was a choice which I made. No one else was responsible for it. Now I am taking responsibility for my situation no one means no one is responsible for my situation and circumstances except me and choices made by me. Life is not bad due to the circumstances but due to the choices made by me.👊

[@daisylu1973]

🎉🍀🤞🖖🍀🎊

[@darkartist321]

So according to this, I definitely have a victim mentality. Which is frustrating because I don't understand how/why it makes me a victim in my situations and seems like it negates all the work I've been trying to do the past 12 years, through therapy, medications, picking up new hobbies etc. I feel like I'm usually quick to blame myself, over others. Constantly reflecting on negative experiences and trying to figure out what actions I did that led to the situation. I'm pretty critical and hyper-aware of myself. (Probably from years of depression) I do get frustrated at times, but bottle it up because I understand it's a feeling that will pass, plus I like to avoid conflict. My unrealistic expectations I felt usually derived from poor communication skills and extreme passion (Which themselves are symptoms of my ADHD) This comment itself is an example of my over-explaining, which I tend to do because I'm aware of my poor communication skills and want to make sure I've expressing my experiences and thoughts correctly (hah). I've been depressed for 13 years so I definitely have a negative outlook on things, but doesn't mean I'm not trying to make things work or make the best out of my situation. I'm definitely successful in many aspects of life. I definitely don't cope with stress well anymore because my mind berates me with intrusive thoughts and forces me to dwell on experiences that hurt or traumatized me. The joy in various things in life kinda just got sucked away gradually over time Not really sure what I can do to improve and do better. It's definitely been getting worse and affecting those that I care about around me. To the point where they don't want to interact with me anymore, which I understand and respect, despite the frustration it's causing me.

[@jonathanbrady7261]

As you said, emotions are temporary. But bottling your feelings up repeatedly over time will negatively impact your mental health. If you feel frustrated, try and calmly explain (whether the frustration is about a specific person or situation) what frustrated you, and talk with said person that frustrated you/another person you trust to try and help resolve the situation. And feeling like “I need to go at THIS pace to recover, and I need to do THESE exact things to help me” could also be stressing you out. Go at your own pace. If someone set guidelines for how exactly you’re “supposed” to recover, but it’s not helping, don’t be afraid to try something new! Bye and stay safe

[@darkartist321]

@jonathanbrady7261 Appreciate the response Jonathan. I hope you have a great day!

[@Bounts_]

I relate so much to what you are saying, I've been following all the advice that has been given to me yet I don't feel much different. It is hard to be positive when you have been depressed for a long time. Its hard not to be miserable when that's all you have ever felt, you know?

[@sunbeam9222]

I don't think you have a victim mentality. People with a victim mentality express in passive form, you expressed in active form all the way, you might have a bit of a negative mindset but you're self aware and on the right track imo. We can reprogram our subconscious. I did that by sorting out my thoughts and with practice abandoning those who don't serve me and replacing them with those that do.

[@Bounts_]

@@sunbeam9222 Thanks for your response, that was nice of you, I actually felt a bit better reading that. I do hope that you get better as well, good luck.

[@CheetahSnowLeopard]

Sometimes labels like “Victim Mentality” are a convenient and oversimplified way of making assumptions about a person’s very painful life journey. This video (and cartoon illustrations) has a punitive and sanctimonious tone. A similar tone to the many who use the phrase “victim mentality” when describing others they really do not know beyond the surface level.

[@claws61821]

Looking through the comment threads and noting which ones she doesn't bother to acknowledge in any way suggests a pattern that implies this is deliberate on her part. I hope I'm wrong and making a false analysis from too small of a dataset but that's what I'm seeing so far.

[@deprivedlemon]

Somewhat agree. Those with depression/ptsd/cptsd are prone to having a victim mentality, but sometimes as you rightly say it could be the result of a painful childhood/trauma.

[@sunbeam9222]

Victim mentality is always the result of trauma. There's no need for self blame. It's not our fault we went through trauma but it's our responsibility to heal. Self empowerment starts with realising that.

[@christinacreates2393]

Okay so what about all the people who were also victims who didn’t form this harmful mindset? Having a victim mindset is REAL and it is harmful. Just google it. You’re acting like the creator made up this term to hurt you personally. Dang the victim mentality is strong with you. I wish you luck on addressing it.

[@christinacreates2393]

@@claws61821 so you’re taking it as a personal attack? Do you personally know the creator of this video?

[@tangbein]

Sadly this applies to me. I got a physical problem which I am very afraid of confronting because of the circumstances in which it happened. I have confronted the problem openly, and partially openly earlier to both my parents and doctors, but I havent been taken seriously. Because I havent been taken seriously I have just walked around in my dorm, sulking over the problem while blaming my parents and doctor for not taking me seriously. I of course know that if I am afraid of confronting the problem I need to spend time mustering up courage to confront the problem, but I am too lazy to do that.

[@SubhuSingh-tk8ev]

I am glad to realise that i don't have any victim mentality.😊

[@deprivedlemon]

Good video. I think sometimes the line between victim mentality and depression can get blurred. The difference lies between those who try to do something about it and those who ultimately give up and allow the victim mentality to take over. For those with depression it can be a real battle to stop having a victim mindset, especially for those who were genuine victims of all kinds of abuse. A lot of narcissists have the victim mentality but a lot of them refuse therapy, thus perpetuating the victim mentality.

[@MexicanCrusader]

Blah blah blah

[@alex_chugaev]

I think “keeping the score” (2:44) is bad but “keeping the counter of bad things” might me helpful to evaluate how does that person acts towards you. Making vengeance a competition or game isn’t healthy tho.

[@siddharthkrishna7249]

I'm not confident that I can beat the victim mentality. Positivity feels like a bandaid at this point.

[@aminahmed2220]

What a fantastic video I actually always felt responsible to be honest

[@Mangost8en]

POV: You're a gaslighter about to send this to someone getting naturally upset over your mistreatment to gaslight them even further

[@potipotiron]

I'm relieved to see that many of those signs decreased since I started to work on them a few years ago. Some are still there but minimized to the extreme. What relieves me the most is that I've never been aggressive/condescending to anyone. It didn't stop me from thinking those things but I knew I would hurt others and no way I could do that. I don't know what influenced me the most: my education or my personality, but anyway thanks to my parents and to people making these videos for warning us about those signs.

[@sebastiansprucer7609]

Thank you for this wonderful video. The victim mentality really has no place in this world.

[@orbismworldbuilding8428]

I have this. I consider it a form of narcissism I don't remember if its part of what's called vulnerable narcissism or not, but i think i remember essentially this described with it.

[@GemmaJohnshat]

It's fascinating how these conditions seem to be interrelated. I grew up with narcissistic parents and I know that I have to watch myself in order not to fall into similar patterns. I think there may be some form of a narcissistic parents to victim mentality pipeline.

[@orbismworldbuilding8428]

@@GemmaJohnshat i agree It makes sense though when you think about how similar victim mentality and entitlement can be, how they both can lead someone to avoid taking accountability, and how both make someone think everyone is out to get them. They probably have similar psychology and similar development, maybe even a sort of pipeline effect like you said. But i haven't really stopped to think about that much besides how they act similar in ways. I probably should compare and research them, because causes is important for treatment and prevention. One thing ive noticed though is i behave more narcissistically when i have less control of my situations, or feel like i have less control of my situation. I stop acting as selfish when i have a sense of empowerment, but will often resist that reflexively and choose to clench up and be defensive and hide away type of thing. But on the other hand, i have to be careful not to have a power-trip when i do gain some sense of control, and my guess is that its me trying to milk it for all its worth becaue of feeling powerless most of the time. So a consistent and reliable self-empowerment that doesn't involve being controlling of others or self-sabotaging will probably help me get acclimated and not be so damn power-hungry or avoidant of any accountability, responsibility or mutualism.

[@rohanraje3884]

Today i realize it is better to be Abuser than victim

[@exiledPostman]

Some of these traits are a little close to narcissism, but not quite. The part about no one being able to live up to the person's expectations, the feeling that *EVERYONE* is out to get them, this describes a lot of people I used to know. I am beyond grateful that I no longer associate with any of them. Some people can't be helped because they have no interest in being helped and would rather live in the lie that they are helpless because it gives them a sense of identity to believe they are somehow cursed by God to live a life of helplessness.

[@supereee7]

As a therapist, I approve of this video 👍🏾😃

[@2cyne]

This video is litterally just telling other people to blame me for everything

[@2cyne]

My life could be ruined if rhe wrong people in my area see this

[@TokoRyu-ts1er]

Wow I finally find my personality🙁

[@rusted_general]

I am the opposite of playing the victim People take advantage of me Hurt me and I can't stand it anymore Idk why people say this about me

[@JoelDJohnson1986]

I over explain myself, and repeat myself A LOT. I'm reading the book "The Chakras and The Human Energy Fields, and I'm reading Chapter 11, which talks about the endocrinology and chakras.

[@samlightfoot1771]

I used to struggle with victim mentality. I used victim mentality as a (very unhealthy and unhelpful) coping mechanism. I hated myself, so I wanted everyone else to be at fault for my problems. I felt like if I took accountability, it would validate all the reasons I told myself I was an awful person. It has taken a lot of work to get out of that mindset. Before I was ready to be accountable, I had to build my self confidence. I had to learn to be kind to myself, and stop reinforcing the idea that I was a victim. I had to learn to shift perspective, to stop obsessing over things I have no power to change, and start focusing on the things I do have the power to change. Then, I was ready to be accountable. Being accountable has not made me hate myself. It has made me love myself more. Being accountable has strengthened my relationships with others, and helped me to learn and grow. It has helped me recognize mistakes as learning opportunities. I still struggle sometimes with feelings of helplessness, but I am developing coping skills to combat those feelings. Escaping victim mentality has changed my life, and changed me for the better. I am finally beginning to feel powerful.

[@maryamshaaban74]

Oh, I have a good one. When you hit your daughter on her back when she's walking away from an argument and she turns around to stop you from hitting her again and you cry uncontrollably telling everybody that she's the one who hit you. Or when your daughter lays in bed ill for 2 years straight vomiting blood daily, unable to eat, drink or even sleep, losing weight before your eyes and you don't take her to the hospital and when she starts feeling better she goes with you to work to finish YOUR work for you and she's surprised that you told your work buddies that she wasn't sick at all but was just laying around refusing to help with chores. Or, when your daughter invites you to her graduation party because she came in the top 3 and you refuse because "you have work" eventhough you didn't, and your daughter who had to spend the ceremony looking and feeling like an orphan, justifying your absence to her teachers finds out you told everyone that she never invited you and how badly you wanted to celebrate her despite you telling her how much of a failure she was for not achieving 1st place despite you purposefully berating her at home and refusing to take her to school most days so she fails so you prove to yourselves that you're right when you told her so. Does that count as victim mentality?

[@SlimShadySkip1]

Omg, This video hit incredibly accurate. I know someone who at a very young age, litterally by the time he could walk. Was a nightmare. He was a Sweet young boy and loved by all. But he had extreme adhd, possibly bipolar disorder and as he grew into school age - definately Anger Issues. In school he caused problems constantly, was recommended for and moved to a Special Class (with only a few students) so that the Teachers could better manage the outbursts and such. The thing is, when you are getting in trouble That much. When your behavior is being dealt with on a constant basis. You learn to side step the responsibility and continually blame others. It gets to the point that Even in situations now where another classmate does something, starts something and you were not at fault at all. That it is seen as crying wolf when you don't accept responsibility for That situation, even if someone else really was to blame. This does two things. It creates a Victim Mentality and also gives him the ammunition to continually sell the narrative (in his own head) that it is So Unfair that No One sticks up for him when he did nothing wrong. I was the best dad I could be. Raising this boy from the day I brought him home from the NICU at 2mo Premature and only 3lb - All By Myself. With a Drug Addicted and Cheating Mother who was gone before he was even released from the NICU. But now, I have a 20yr old son. Who I am a 1000% Proud of for Joining the Marines and having came a Long Long Way. Especially considering the fact that the Holidays b4 he left for Boot Camp he Assaulted Me and punched me 3 Times in the Face while I just stood there. The Anger from him feeling Betrayed his whole life for me Not Sticking up for him, for what he had come to convince himself His Whole Life. He had built this chip on his shoulder and convinced himself (for his whole life) that it was Everyone Else that was at fault for his problems. He is a black belt at twisting situations and Explaining himself over and over trying desperately to justify his actions and get you to agree that he was not the one at fault. Going on litterally for hours at times repeating the same things over and over and over. When you try to (walking on egg shells) bring some constructive criticism and try to help him see things from a different perspective, he will immediately Lash Out. Going from 10 to 100 in a second and making personal attacks, saying he hates me, cursing and being just so nasty and ugly. Just to calm down an hour later and think that a simply "Sorry" is enough to undo all those hurtfull things said. He has made it 3 years into his 4 year contract in the Marines now. And on one hand at times he has been doing extremely great. But he is still causing problems for himself by refusing to take responsibility for himself. Over reacting to situations that are not a big deal and should be able to be brushed off his shoulder and handled and put behind him. Isolating himself and having excuses for not interacting with others the way he could. He gets "Into His own Head" way too much and will fester on things. He has been so low and depressed at times that he even mentioned *Self Harm* more than once while there and was almost seperated because of it. He is convinced that All of his command is out to get him. Can not roll with things and has to get confrontational over even very small things. Putting himself into a downward spiral until its out of his mind and his Head will let him move on. I would give my Life tomorrow, if it meant he could not feel this way and thrive and succeed at life. I Love this young man so much it hurts. Even thru all the Hurtful stuff he throws my way and can go off on rants blaming Me for Everything wrong with his life. Grasping at straws to throw anything he can in my face to obfuscate responsibility and make Me out to be the bad guy. I would do Anything for him. I am desperate for help. He has had counselors in the past and they have just fed into his victim mentality as he has had his whole life to perfect throwing blame on everyone else. Any links / books / resources would be greatly appreciated.

[@daisylu1973]

Sorry about your son & your healing journey with him. These books have helped me Greatly, eventhough he might not be borderline, this book is Amaziiiing & it'll Enlightened you lots: Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship by Christine Ann Lawson. The other is: The White Knight Syndrome: Rescuing Yourself from Your Need to Rescue Others by Dr. Mary C. Lamia 🤞🍀🖖

[@danlhendl]

First they victimize you and then they tell you you have a victim mentality! Then you change the world. We all have our cross to bear.😅

[@whatpach8145]

1. Learned helplessness - by listening this, I understood: fortunately, I don't have it. I have passed some challenges and still completing them. 2. False proof of anger - I often just fill my soul with anger after quarrels. And then I explode. But the anger is proved normally. 3. Unrealistic expectations - uh... I dream big, I don't say to anyone like "It's not yours" or "You can't reach this goal". I am going to my dream and still hope that it'll worth it! 4. Negative outlook - mostly I think that I am the problem for the world, not they for me. Like "I can't cheer someone up as it was before - I've lost it, I am bad. I shouldn't do this to not hurt people." etc. 5. Not coping with stress - sometimes I want to be alone, but... For real, I don't feel bad about it. Sometimes even very good (yeah I'm strange)

[@nasmja]

I feel like begin always the victim but I'm actually ashamed of it sometimes like asking myself "Why did I say that, can't I just stop my annoying personality?, I'm always the victim and the person to blame for doing nothing?..."

[@leax3084]

Wow... all these matches me perfectly... now I don't know what to do.

[@jorgeperez2872]

I feel somewhat similar, I understand the World is not necessarily against me but in reality I can't control anything of what happens to me, I may strive to do actions that guide me to a certain goal I have but there's ultimately a lot of forces out of my control that can dim that hope of getting to it

[@s.g2344]

I think I've just realised I have this- it's a hard pill too swallow but I'm glad I know it now so that now I can start working on myself and look forward to the future. 😊 xx

[@daisylu1973]

🎉🍀🤞🖖🍀🎊

[@robertgaines-tulsa]

This reminds me of yesterday when I was mowing the lawn and my sister claimed I mowed over a plant. It was also hot outside, and I get in a zone when I'm mowing the lawn. She started yelling at me before I got into the area. It took me off guard and took me a moment to stop. I mowed around the plant that I thought she was talking about, the only plant I saw, and stopped. It's not a very good flowerbed without any defined boundaries, and it's not weeded out. She started jumping down my throat claiming I mowed over you plant. I pointed to the plant that I thought was hers that I avoided, and she said that wasn't it. I asked her where it was, and I didn't see anything where she pointed, so I don't know. At any rate, she insists I deliberately mowed down her plant. Talking with her about it was fruitless. I didn't bother talking to her today because I would like to replace the pump on the washing machine, and I need to be mentally stable to do that.

[@Luka.stippy]

Can you please do a video about a friend moving? my very close friend just moved and this would help me a lot. thank you!

[@shuvro2864]

I literally relate to half of them. I do realize that how I react in certain situations is not healthy. I just dont know how to react or what to do. I just cant overcome it.

[@Katrica670]

@2:17 do Not kid yourself, "ppl" know what they are doing they are not under 1 yrs old! 🙄

[@Nopenoo-z9f]

This is my first time being early!

[@craigmerkey8518]

Great video! No one has ever told me this because I could never compete with my parents who have been on a grievance tour for decades!

[@Psych2go]

Thank you for the comment. What do you mean by "grievance tour"? Could you tell us a bit more?

[@AymNBlast]

Question, could a victim mentality could also be the scapegoat? Because my family members back then plays the blame game on me.

[@goosequeen2144]

I think so. In my family, I am the scapegoat so I relate to a lot of these but I can also think of events that have happened/continue to happen that I think contribute to these kinds of behavior.

[@clusterstage]

Twitter, not KZbin.

[@KingsguardRP]

This is women as a whole. Society holds men accountable. Men do not have the victim card to play, the luxury of blaming our decisions on others.

[@theabelstick3495]

I say that most of the time, I usually play the victim but not for the reasons explained in the video. When I hear someone getting upset or hearing two people arguing, I mostly think "Why can't we just accept what just happened and move on?" It's when I'm happy and minding my won business is when I tend to have this naive behavior. If I get caught up in the argument, I try to play out the situation without making much harm. If I end up snapping for any reason, that frustration melts to sadness and disappointment mostly because I don't like to lose control of my emotions and get angry. I spent my time in bed to try to calm myself down (sometimes I fall asleep doing this) but I also don't want to do anything while I'm mad

[@sunbeam9222]

We can't repress our emotions. Emotions are ok. We all have them. It's denying parts of yourself than judging some emotions are bad, we're not meant to have them. It's ok to lose control, who wants a fully controlled life? You're perfectly fine, please don't be scared or ashamed of not controlling some emotions we're not robots. Wishing you all the best xx

[@theabelstick3495]

@@sunbeam9222 I didn't think losing control was okay, who would want some kid throwing a fit? But then again, that's how the kid improves its behavior by seeing what they did work

[@sunbeam9222]

@@theabelstick3495 I'm not sure what you mean by throwing a fit. I m not saying throwing table and chairs is ok :D just that if you feel anger acknowledge that, it s a valid feeling. Bottling it up will only have it come back harder anyway. Once we accept all our feelings they don't tend to show up in eruption form. They just want to be seen.

[@sunbeam9222]

Just curious? Are you judging your feelings?

[@theabelstick3495]

@@sunbeam9222 Yes by "Throwing a fit" I mean visually showing that you're upset, maybe pushing over a chair but you're showing that you're angry. I don't think I judge my emotions, I allow myself to be happy but I also acknowledge that I'll probably get upset from something

[@Fabelaz]

One doesn't have to blame oneself to be accountable. So take responsibility when you ought to instead of thinking about who or what to blame.

[@pinkishhaven5158]

Genuine question✋ What if while I don't take responsibility, or don't act on fixing the internal and personal consequences of my actions (say, for example, failing grades), I don't really let it affect anyone else either. I only ever let it affect me. Putting on a happy face, a wide smile reassuring everyone that I'll be fine, and letting them know that I'm happy with their progress in life while I'm content to stay in the back (also, I'm self-sabotaging/self-harming). Is that also a form of victim mentality? The only time I ever act out responsibly is knowing that it will affect someone else's progress, so I'll snap out of whatever trance I'm in and become genuinely active.

[@twilightaesthetic]

I always thought I had a victim mindset, turns out I don't, because that was them gaslighting me for asserting my rights and how I feel about what they did. Thanks for this video I can further feel less like it's me and that it's actually them.

[@cynax7757]

I've been in that situation so very long, I no longer see a easy way out.

[@_M.e.l.a.n.i.e_]

A toxic person i used to be friends with told me to "stop playing the victim", i was the person who apologised for anthing and everything, even if it wasnt my fault. The ONE time i stood up for myself i got told to "stop playing the victim"

[@Lyssmynx]

Some of these sound kinda like ptsd

[@Oak-g3i]

how on earth is psych2go posting such good content but so often its admierable

[@Psych2go]

Thank you for the kind words! We have many talented artists and writers who work very hard to provide high quality content!

[@RianAlldred]

Look at it this way my former victims- picked on forgotten, single out , - outsiders , unique ones , nobody's for life your not alone outsiders baby ! ❤

[@didito]

I recognise almost all of these in me. I know for some time I have this kind of mentality and I think I'm trying to fix it, but it doesn't feel enough. Are there other ways than the mentioned in the video to help it?

[@claudelleclarynn1756]

Eeks... sounds like me right now. Suffering greatly from mental health these days 😢😢😢

[@Dr.Purple01]

Glad to see everyone here 1 min after upload time has notifications on

[@Mangost8en]

Very informative video! I'm sure narcissists won't be misusing it to put more leverage in gaslighting others!

[@TGDHour]

I will say that it’s true for me, but I also let a lot of upsetting things go in the past and never addressed them, which made things worse. I’m not saying I had a terrible life, but it wasn’t glamorous either and I’ve always struggled mentally.

[@pennytrue2741]

No one plays the victim as much as a sociopath and psychopath.

[@Missmagazinebura]

Yes I have a friend who has victim mentality because they are always bullied

[@Psych2go]

If they are always bullied, I don't think this is a victim mentality but an actual victim. Has your friend ever sought help for their current situation?

[@Missmagazinebura]

No because they are bipolar people take advantage of them

[@RubyLine]

Can it also be the effects of depression, on top of having narcissistic toxic parents ? 😕

[@deprivedlemon]

Yes, I think there is a link. Depression can often lead to someone having a victim mentality but I think the difference lies in those who try to come out of that mindset and those who make a conscious decision to stay in it.

[@Alekkssandra]

My ex used to tell me I had a victim mentality. It took me years to leave him, he was a narcissistic abuser.

[@sunbeam9222]

Well tbh you probably had, in order to stay with a narcissist abuser for years, no judgement whatsoever. But you regained your strength and power and exited that seat. Cuckoo to you.

[@Katrica670]

@3:13-3:18 really? That's why I heard soooo many say we are in a narcissist pandemic?! Come on now! 👀🧐🤔

[@williamjohnston580]

Here's the catch to the entire thing, at the end of the day it doesn't matter if you were in the right and someone wronged you, you have to learn how to learn from the experience and shed the old experience to move on and not put yourself in the victim position. Basically even if you are a victim of something classifiable or non-classifiable under the law you are still genetically responsible to rebound and do better everytime to prove yourself to the human race that you are genetically fit to continue to fit in and contribute to society. Has nothing to do with your personal experiences, has to do with the inate genes within everyone to push forward, and anyone acting like a victim doesnt help the mission. Like a drowning man pulling another down by mistake to help get air, as a society we'd rather see the victim deal with it on their own without bringing the others down. Once you learn how to use the losses as fuel and take full responsibility you can get better results than dwelling on the wrongs done to you. People will not help you with this, yes they will judge you while your in the process of healing, but when you recover they will be the first ones there to take advantage of the new and better person you've become. This is human nature.

[@lisanewberry9145]

This reminds me of someone out here who plays the victim while making money off their traumas..

[@turningbear9564]

i relate to 5/6 of these, and i think it is because of my autism. although a lot of the time i am a victim at school because i hear people at my school call each other autistic when they are being weird/stupid and they all know i have it, its common knowledge that me and a few others in my year have autism. and at school, my social life has been really diffu=icult, i have a toxic friend who (from your videoa) i decided it would be best to end it with them, which i have tried to do, but i keep being manipulated into being with them as he knows i have autism and that im not mentally strong enough to say "go away" so he does things like time when he leaves for school so he runs into me where our routes meet up (walking), and walk next to me when walking to lessons, and on the way to break, and i feel like i cant escape. I am aware i went off topic of the victim mindset, but this video has made me realise that i do have one, but i am also a victim in general. if anyone has any idea on how i can simply ask my friend to leave me alone, baring in mind i suck at communication and get social anxiety, i would really appreciate it :)

[@amyli092]

I know that this video explains me to a T... People have called me out on it, and while this attitude is something I've worked to improve on a lot, I realize that this tends to flare back up every now and then when I've reached my limit of patience and participation in life. Being an adult honestly just sucks; you never get a break from the endless grind of work and responsibilities. Sometimes, I just miss being a kid...

[@itihhadewangan9872]

Honestly speaking I do really have the victims mentality, which leads me to blame others for everything which went wrong, or didn't happened according to my plan in my life, even when the other person did something with generosity, and never had any wrong intentions, i just end up seeing the whole world against me as if whatever happens is to make me suffer, and then all this negative thoughts lead me to ignore the mistakes i have committed, it makes me feel like as if nothing was in my hands, when in reality i could have done everything right just as i planed to if I tried the other way around.

[@sunbeam9222]

I think when we know better we do better. We cannot revisit life with a new awareness, which we didn't have at the time then believe we could have acted differently. it's not accurate nor fair on ourselves. We do our best. And then we learn and do better.

[@shraddhaverma7474]

I've a person in my life whom i trust the most... she's my best friend. In an argument with me ,she said - i always play victim card and I'm manipulative and so on ! I didn't even know the meaning of her words I was just a sad and depressed soul who used to tell everything happening in her life to her best friend:) cause telling her my life problems is like stress reliever , now after listening to her words and after watching the video idk what should i do now :)