A In Depth Analysis on Buying Variegated Plants & ‘Rare’ Plant Dissection

[@phytosexual]

instagram.com/phytosexual 🍃 don’t forget to like :) 🌿

[@josephinejones9392]

[@Baddie-fp4qm]

I never forget to like, let’s go set all the monstera albo in the world on fire. Or we can let them revert.

[@ingevanrheenen2891]

Next time somebody remarks that my foundation isnt flawless ill say ‘no B€&@ its variegated…’

[@pottymouthedplanter]

I followed!! ❤️

[@bexyrexy]

Unprovoked cerebral convocations… Thanks for making Walmart classier Nick!

[@janisdeksnis7303]

You're literally one of the most underrated and most entertaining content creators in "planttube" the quality, the content .. my chlorophyll is snatched.

[@adrianvargas2261]

Not the chlorophyll 😭

[@misse2013]

100% agree

[@EmmaMorgan09]

Absolutely. One of my favourite KZbinrs. Actually in top three x

[@phytosexual]

You are now variegated, good luck.

[@victoredwardo9485]

My chlorophylls is snatched. What Even i have never seen gaylingo and botanical Words in the same room. Like yaaaaaasss Queen athurium come true henny get those vines. Snatch My peduncols make those flowers pop bestie You werk that sunsstressed

[@theVeganWerewolf]

"Live Laugh Love" is the art of maniacally destroying a philodendron pink princess.

[@phytosexual]

My daily affirmations.

[@ingevanrheenen2891]

Actually rather therapeutical …

[@nhatreally]

mine has been at 3 leaves for the past 2 years. It''ll grow a leaf, but one will subsequently drop off a week following the unfurl of the new leaf.

[@rdred8693]

Your humor is as dry as a Lithops, and we love it.

[@phytosexual]

I hate lithops, having to resist watering for a year and then they divide once and that's it.

[@Man-ej6uv]

idk mine grew like crazy

[@velvetvert9431]

@@phytosexual Just saw lithops being sold in a gift shop as "The Unkillable Plant", as a factory packaged kit. Fair enough, that which is dead cannot die.

[@sarapocorn]

thank you for being a safe haven for biologically literate plant connaisseurs and connaisseuses.

[@phytosexual]

ur welcome

[@jessmtnz]

And conaissasses.

[@sarapocorn]

@@jessmtnz My 8 years of French did not prepare me for this moment. Is this an ass-joke or a gender-neutral term? I fear the former lol

[@keithklassen5320]

@@sarapocorn ¿Por que no los dos?

[@sarapocorn]

@@keithklassen5320 Bien sûr!

[@Azmeaiel]

I have seen a lot of people trying to sell mineral starved, sunburnt and even glyphosate damaged plants as varigated, great guide and entertaining.

[@phytosexual]

Ah such honesty in this community.

[@selinaruiz9395]

"Don't buy variagated plants....thanks so much for watching..." you're my favorite. I love your videos lol. Also...lavender travesty is an amazing band name.

[@phytosexual]

omg tysm

[@lindapease620]

I found myself laughing uncontrollably in some segments of this video. Also I can only imagine the horror on some faces as you were cutting up some of these plants. It was so refreshing for this 68 year old grandmother. Love you and keep up the awesomeness.

[@phytosexual]

Thank you, good luck with your grandmothering.

[@melissaparker572]

“Don’t shop for aroids on an empty stomach.” 🤣🤣🤣💀 thanks for all the laughs, the insight into your sweatshirt collection, and the super informative content!! 💚

[@phytosexual]

You know all of my sweatshirts.

[@carlaangelaferrer5871]

I retained none of the information, but all of the joy and laughter. Thank you.

[@lilmissbeats]

KZbin is dead. Expect for this channel. I love how incredibly sciencey and sarcastic you are, and your jokes are so incredibly niche and creative. Thanks for sharing your videos with us!

[@phytosexual]

Thank you!

[@imberrysandy]

When the world needed him most, he blesses us with a new video! 🥰🌱

[@phytosexual]

Yes I guess :p

[@porodeltata3369]

ur videos give me mental peace. & ur whiteboard explanation is the best explanation out there very informative

[@phytosexual]

Thank you so much :)

[@CassandraHanley]

Am I the only one who just likes a nice shiny green, healthy plant? My plain monsteras , philodendrons and pothos may be common af, but they’re happy and taking over my house and their poor variegated cousins are just struggling along side of them looking anaemic and sad

[@phytosexual]

no, they're not rare and people can't wet there planties trying to fight over them and drain their bank accounts.

[@plackCrack]

Omg where have u been? Hope u r fabulous. This is the only plant channel I can stand.

[@phytosexual]

I'm here. New video out!

[@LillibitOfHere]

The way I’ve managed to get new growth on my calathea is to put it in a corner next to the humidifier and ignore it. Don’t move it, touch it, look at, enter the room without permission. PS I’ve lived that rural life. No fun.

[@phytosexual]

I loooove shucking cooorn and drinking Mtn. Dew

[@josephinejones9392]

Ah, thinking about the £ I have 'spent' (wasted) on pink princess philodendron ebay/ mercari cuttings which later died on me and wishing I had invested in a good therapist for the anxious/ preoccupied attachment style my calatheas have given me xo

[@phytosexual]

Therapy is always the best investment, however the things that go down in this community wouldn't be nearly as interesting.

[@WoodlandT]

Watching you massacre that PPP was legit cathartic. I have a very oppositional relationship with mine, which was gifted to me. Half the leaves are torn from getting stuck. The pink chunks are turning brown. Yet somehow I’ve become emotionally invested in this plant that I didn’t even want. Maybe I’ll go all ginsu and make a PPP chutney & feed it to the person who gave it to me?! 😈

[@miimii5455]

😂😂

[@phytosexual]

They're so draining. You want them to look nice and they always disappoint you.

[@miimii5455]

Glad I don't care for them. I was glad he butchered that over hyped drama queen

[@craftingweirdo6498]

If they get stuck again try wrapping a dampened towel round the stuck leaf. Let it sit a lil bit then remove the towel and the leaf has it easier. If it still stuck, try that again and at last try to manually remove it

[@Shadow_Arbor]

Nick your humor is priceless. It's really fun to hear you using terms that my professor's use in Uni. Science is fun.

[@phytosexual]

Right, nobody gets it.

[@M_SC]

Good for you being a science teacher out where people might really need it

[@phytosexual]

Thank you, nobody ever actually gets what I'm trying to say but at least it makes them feel smart.

[@KACn5582]

From safety scissors to scalpel blades. Like from sublime to ridiculous. Always informative and always hilarious.

[@phytosexual]

I realized safety scissors would not suffice at cutting plants strategically after I recorded that part of the video.

[@kmseileen]

loveee your dry humour, clicked for the plant content but stayed for the laughs. earned a sub:)

[@phytosexual]

where is my sandwich?

[@huntresskira]

before i continue watching, 30 seconds in and your vibe is a whole package. I CAME HERE FOR THE PLANTS. I STAYED FOR THE VIBES. Subscribed ❤

[@phytosexual]

Thank you!

[@artybea9316]

Yes, this is perfect, I will from now on pronounce DNA as d-nuh, I’m always here for wardrobe changes, and finally, I love the ppp chop. It’s one of those plants that everyone loses their minds over but I just don’t get it, to me it just looks like someone mixed all of the colors on their paint pallet and made muc. 🤷🏻‍♀️ give me those silvery bubbles all day long💜

[@phytosexual]

The wardrobe changes but it's just a different shade of sweatshirt.

[@artybea9316]

@@phytosexual 50 shades of sweats?

[@ingevanrheenen2891]

Wasn’t D-Nuh the last Egyption Farao 🤔

[@maatirah6530]

Yay!! So glad to see you with a new video. You were my first person I subscribed to when beginning my plant love a few months ago. 🥰. Thank you

[@phytosexual]

Glad to have you 💚

[@firecracker8071]

Nick are you really a school teacher your student must absolutely love you

[@phytosexual]

I'm not though. I don't do kids.

[@alicecarvo6398]

Love your videos! I do have to say that I love the color of my Burgundy princess! It's a nice change of pace in the "mostly green" world of plants!

[@phytosexual]

Honestly a burgundy princess is great if you didn't pay $300 for it. It's better to just go for non-variegated plants sometimes.

[@alicecarvo6398]

@@phytosexual Hi. I paid $65 (the most I had ever spent on a plant!) for a small pink princess philodendron from "Plants and Pameirin" about 5 years ago. After growing it for awhile, I wasn't happy with the amount of variegation I was getting, so I took the plunge and cut it up into 7 pieces. Two of them gave me nicer variegation, one of them no variegation, & the others were about the same as the original plant. The interesting thing is that the one with no variegation (my burgundy princess) grew about twice as fast as the others 🤷.

[@conwelcrochet]

Yasss! Your videos give me life. Sarcastic and real af ♡ 💯 . Dont understand how u dont have millions of followers!

[@phytosexual]

Maybe someday, unless I get a sugar daddy and stop posting.

[@V4mpiroDoido]

finally a channel about plants that is actually funny and entertaining. also 15:11

[@andrewmontez7556]

You’re the only plantuber that goes super in depth and the only plantuber that mixes irony with super helpful knowledge. I hope you have a hot girl summer 😙

[@standdownrobots_ihaveoldglory]

Lol you answered my question in the first few seconds. I do love a variegated plant but I was noticing that the tips to keep them variegated sometimes went against what they need to be healthy. I told my roomie I thought maybe it was one of those things where you appreciate the patterns in the moment, but that chlorophyll is a good thing and it's probably healthiest to let the plants green up! Love this channel, science plus snarky humor is always a win !

[@saraj1002]

Your sassy comments on your various complications with plants is the only thing giving me seretonin today. Thank you lol. Amazing.

[@anastasiawak894]

I love your videos. You’ve mastered informative knowledge w sarcasm and humor…. You are one of my top favorites. I don’t watch many plant videos as much any more and have unsubscribed to a lot of content makers but you keep things fresh. I often rewind a lot only to hear your punchlines again. 😂♥️

[@phytosexual]

Thank you! New video out today!

[@AliceWanders]

Im obsessed with your channel... i found you thanks to the "do you need grow lights to grow plants" video and am now binge watching them all. Loved every sweater in this video lol

[@PixieII]

As a fan of cheap plants, I was very happy to buy a variegated dwarf umbrella tree for £4 in my local Morrisons complete with pot. Living the high life 🤣

[@ingridforsberg4495]

as was mentioned somewhere, price is not a criteria of esthetic worth. So why not!

[@MarcHatePage]

this actually helped me so much knowing what to look for in cuttings. and it was also really funny.

[@phytosexual]

I. Really. Try.

[@epe-equestrianpatterneduca6184]

I just took some trimmings from my White Knight philodendron and watching you hack apart the pink princess pained me so much. Also you are so funny, please continue to never give a shit

[@pr27038]

my fav youtuber nowadays. get behind me before rare plant fairy takes you out

[@Miles_Hoffman]

Yet another in-depth video. Thank you! I have to say, I personally don’t like most variegated plants, because like you say, dead plant walking… next time I do pick a plant for variegation, I’ll shoot for 30%

[@phytosexual]

Yeah depends on the plant.

[@Miles_Hoffman]

@@phytosexual oh sure- have you seen the variegated Pilea peperomioides?

[@frasercook5823]

Watching you dissect expensive variegated plants was satisfying

[@Lili-wc4ku]

i found your channel 2 mins ago and youre my new favourite person

[@phytosexual]

Thanks :)

[@hellojoe9946]

I needed this, physically, mentally, and spiritually, to get me through the full day of work and inevitable all-nighter I’ve got ahead of me 🤪🥴 you’re a gem 👑

[@hana1130]

I hope Nick’s fun energy will give you an extra boost to complete whatever work you have quickly 💪😀 you can do it!

[@phytosexual]

Good luck!

[@itslog49]

You're absolutely genius, Nick! You make me laugh/cry, and I lurve it. Why do you not have millions of subscribers? What's wrong with the world!? Thank you for your incredible and solid content! ❤

[@northernplantucky]

I think it's because Nick doesn't sell b*******, and people love bulshit LOL!

[@itslog49]

@@northernplantucky Bahaha! Good point.

[@phytosexual]

People generally lack taste. lol not really, grateful for 36k

[@thorstenberninger]

Your videos are so funny and full of information at the same time. Thanks for entertaining.

[@erinhawk]

I like the idea of cutting plants like that. I try to wait to trim my plants back as long as possible because the cutting is so satisfying and I go over board.

[@phytosexual]

I looove cutting things,

[@phileofaudio]

best content I’ve watched in months

[@phytosexual]

nuevo video todayo

[@richardr5878]

Just found you and I find you oddly entertaining. Listening to plant analyses would not be something I expected to watch for more than 3-4 minutes and never expected to get a laugh out of. Nice work and great information.

[@phytosexual]

Thank you!

[@bonnieharris8855]

Always good to see a new one, Nick. You're the best best.

[@yoshisounds]

FINALLY YOU'RE BACK. We missed you!!!

[@phytosexual]

I never left, I was making this video. haha

[@pipersplants]

You have the calmest chaotic energy i have ever came across! Loves it

[@phytosexual]

I love being a paradox.

[@MosaicRose99]

Love your wit and humor Nick. Now off to battle the fungus gnats on my plants who seem to want to make their home flying up my nose...

[@phytosexual]

I heard mosquito bits are good for that.

[@MosaicRose99]

@@phytosexual Thank you, yes, I'm going to try it...

[@ThePlantNerdSD]

You’re a teacher!!! That explains why ur videos r so educational. LOVE IT!!! Ur students must really enjoy ur classes. AANNNDDDD…the wardrobe changes 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 you are a keke 🤣🤣. U love this video.

[@ZroLod]

Well, talking about a monstera deliciosa "chimera" I found one a year ago, it started with few spots of variegation, six months later it turned out to be some kind of monstera mint with very high variegation

[@phytosexual]

YOU ARE LUCKY Now go pimp out your monstera.

[@Charlang009]

Yay! I've been so looking forward to your new video xx

[@phytosexual]

Myself included 😩

[@daisyg8225]

I get filled with joy when I see you uploaded a new video 💚

[@phytosexual]

Appreciated.

[@HugoCassimiro]

omg, your videos were recomended to me but this is the first time watching and I'M LIVING for your sense of humor hahahaha, and the spot on information with scientific accuracy

[@phytosexual]

Thank you!

[@shawnaclement]

As a veterinary anatomist, I concur with your assertion that "science is just cutting stuff up". 🔪

[@elihibdon5548]

19:12 phyto-incidental-para-perpendicular-achlorophyllous-vegetal-projections

[@phytosexual]

hahaha gotcha to spell that out!

[@maggiehuston9526]

My heart skips a beat whenever you post! Yet another educational yet cinematic masterpiece of a video, thank you Nick!!!! ♥️🌿

[@TheStars81]

Please post more. I have succulents but I watch your channel to be educated on house plants but most of all “giggle” uncontrollably.

[@debbiefox6846]

Wanted to say the Botany lesson was fantastic & You are hilarious!😂🤣😁 I Learned , I Laughed , and I Loved when you cut up that pink princess. The editing was fantastic & can't wait to binge watch all of Your videos. Enjoy " what not to do or buy" videos. The safety scissor comment well... I died. We used to live in a 3 sq mile town @ the top of Cali & the Walmart kept my sanity with 2 young kids at the time so I can relate. Everything else was 30 min to 2.5 hrs away one way! Thanks for the valuable information. You might have saved someone $2k.

[@grannyplants1764]

Love the science clearly explained, you commenting on a leaf while filming it, and especially the macro lens stuff...thank you so very much! 🤗🌿🌱

[@phytosexual]

no problem!

[@lisa22630]

I don’t know how many you wore, like 5? but OMG you are like the funniest person on KZbin - like I sit here cry-laughing watching your videos and then I cry-laugh even harder when I remember I’m laughing this hard at a plant video. I literally almost peed my pants when the random chopping started. Seriously you are so smart and informative and so hilarious and I adore you! Please keep making videos! I will definitely contribute if I ever stop being poor. ❤️

[@phytosexual]

New video today. Watch the ads haha

[@aviabad]

When you started tearing up that pink princess I thought oh my g. He hates that thing as much as I do? Cathartic is the word. Thanks Nick for another entertaining and educational video. ❤🌱❤🌱

[@phytosexual]

They suck so much.

[@Plantlexia]

I clicked on this so fast! Great to see another video, it’s awesome as always :D

[@violetkittens8859]

Super informative and hilarious, what an amazing combo. You're my favourite plant youtuber by far!

[@richarda389]

You and that whiteboard have given me life.

[@phytosexual]

you're the second to say this. Ill have to whiteboard all my walls.

[@hana1130]

Moo is clearly too dignified for such a heinous act 😂 Your philodendron Florida Ghost looks happy :) and Lavender Travesty sounds like a nail polish name 💅

[@phytosexual]

Moo is utterly respectful and shows ultimate reverence for the rules of this house.

hey, i really love your videos, they have the perfect amount of humor, information and violence.

[@Darenim]

I think that, deep on the inside, all of us are part chiwawa. This video was very helpfull. Thanks Nick! :)

[@phytosexual]

awww

[@RachelJayne92]

I save my fast movements for when it feels dramatic, but I did choose this video first out of them all, and that’s saying a lot. ☺️

[@Yoliplanting]

I've missed you!!!! Glad to see you back and with such a good one.

[@AileenBaker]

Came to your channel for the plants, stayed for the stellar vocabulary and wry humor ❤

[@firecracker8071]

Thank you Nick, I really adore your videos and needed this good laugh keep up the fantastic videos

[@chrisskins]

Your video comes at the perfect time, everyone is losing their mind on FBs NYC plant exchange this weekend about the new varigated "Pink Birkin". Those of us saying it's chemically induced and or just a new stage of the Birkin reversion get a lot of hate.

[@s.thompson8902]

🤣😂🤣 I love your videos. Your humor ALWAYS makes my day. The surgery took me all the way in. I literally have tears streaming down my face. This was all was very satisfying and educational. Thank you!

[@r.cobrehernandez5923]

This is one of the most helpful plant videos I have ever watched! Thank you! 🙏

[@amyselin6333]

Thank you for blessing us with all your plant wisdom!

[@phytosexual]

np :)

[@breakingburque2200]

Loved this video, I have a lavender travesty in my yard. I love it. I keep it in a tree form and gives me plenty of opportunity to take stress out on it with pruners.

[@phytosexual]

Ohhh great way to manage stress.

[@warnercatto3305]

Just found your channel and I really like your vibes, and I get almost all my plants from lowes/walmart and I just love how cheap the "distressed" ones can be and how pretty they can be once they get so.e tlc

[@phytosexual]

Right? What happen to growing plants for the joy of it instead of buying fully grown monsteras and a-photosynthetic $3000 wet sticks?

[@we2824]

Glad to see you again Nick! Since I binge watched through your others, sometimes multiple times of certain vids, I was definitely like a n ALBO Monstera Albo, DYING to see your videos again... Love your sense of humor and your info. The cutting up of the pink princess was like the "rare plant" communities version of the shower scene in Psycho. I LOVED it! I could hear people screaming as I watched. Also, as a teacher, LOVED the markers. ESPECIALLY when the Expo didn't work. LOL Nick LOL

[@Naniso]

I watch your content to act like I have a certificate in some plant studies somewhere. Thanks for being detailed.

[@phytosexual]

I'm sorry I can't provide you a degree for your time.

[@Naniso]

@@phytosexual hahaha love it anyway!

[@aleph1510]

In the name of science, this was so cool once more. The memes in this keep me going

[@DD-po2hh]

Y’all have no idea how much time and energy I wasted trying to figure out why there’s so many plants. Whole time IT’S THAT DAMN PHILODENDRON

[@kikinoel5762]

I adore you! Your way of speaking and your sense of humor pair perfectly!! Never stop 😍😘

[@nillawaifu]

Finally, someone who knows what the hell they're talking about and cometh in hot with the jokes. I'm here for it.

[@reyhosein2533]

Okay, as far as I know, you seriously are the only person to masacre an albo syngonium & make a beet root salad from a pink princess on KZbin and I thought it was fabulous lol, hey saute a spiritus sancti on your next video, I love how you research for your videos & educate us Nick, keep it up. 😁😁

[@phytosexual]

If you can find someone to donate a spiritus sancti, I will happily filet and sauté to perfection.

[@reyhosein2533]

@@phytosexual 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 !!

[@PlantyGal05]

I love the slice n dice at the end. Informative and fun. I have to get some exacto knives now…for plant surgeries. Lol. Thanks for this video! You’re so much fun!

[@phytosexual]

Go for it!

[@isabelcleave7832]

honestly so underrated and funny as a content creator! i subbed and put the bell on :>

[@MysticalArtista]

Finally someone not just showing the obvious. Great video

[@hannakurlovich2938]

Omg, I got to those video totally by accident. I stuck watching because amount of laugh on the minute is so high that I can’t stop it.

[@moniquee7347]

Every single one of your video's *chef's kiss*

[@phytosexual]

mwwahh

[@annawebb6289]

Thank you for carrying out this research so that I don't have to. Very helpful in allowing me to pretend that I'm watching a documentary for educational purposes. Bonus points for the gratifying PPP massacre segment.... I'm resentful of the existence of the one in my own collection (it was a gift, so it remains ...)

[@phytosexual]

The pink elephant gift.

[@thewittyusername]

I've a crimson princess hoya that has two spots of reversion. I left them on and they've completely stalled while the variegated majority is growing like a weed. Funny how that works sometimes

[@phytosexual]

Who knows? Lots of factors at play with plants.

[@martar.8095]

I sense this video as a very informative way on why you shouldn’t follow the route of ‘I’m going to buy this ‘black bean semi-skimmed milk burgundy philodendron albo variegata marginata’. I definitely won’t spend half the price of my flat on a plant that literally needs a miracle to survive for a week.

[@phytosexual]

Right

[@davidhimself9556]

This, this is humor for me.

[@GabbyRocio]

Great info but also presented with humor, and I love it.

[@definitelynotashark1799]

I bought a really nice Philodendron White Princess for myself when I got a new job. I have since realized that I really don't like Philodendrons, I kinda vibe more with bushy bois like ♥️ Calatheas ♥️. It keeps producing nice and "healthily" variegated leaves but also the mature leaves keep dying, so I've been considering chucking it in the compost. I'll probably sell it for best offer. I have considered turning it into cuttings for stonks, but I honestly can't be assed.

[@phytosexual]

Just sell its as rehab.

[@beleafangie]

Thank you for all the wonderful info Nick.. now I have a little bit more understanding about my collections💚

[@phytosexual]

No problem :)

[@Tillnorth]

Literally just got this vid recommended to me now and omfg you’re too funny 😭

[@smajliiicka]

Your sense of humor has me in stitches😂❤