A Narcissist Knows What He is Doing

[@HipHop-vg7cd]

Facts! 32 years with my husband and ZERO PERSONAL GROWTH PEOPLE! Those BS breadcrumbs are a facade. It took me 25 years to put terminology to vulnerable narcissist bc there was no internet or knowledge back in the early 90's. Praise God for this information today, save yourselves. It's hell on earth, leave and stop wasting your life like I did 💯🙏

[@Time4newbeginning]

I’m 20 years in. Trying to get out but procrastinating. Scared. Hope I can be strong to be free too.

[@tina2667-jy8my]

Such good advice! I pray people hear you and take heed. If only I had been given insight years ago it wouldn't have taken 37 of them to understand what I was dealing with.

[@terrywade3696]

Hiphop: I’m in the same boat with you! 35 years for me! I’ve filed for divorce and I’m packing up my home as I speak! Everything I worked for has gone up in smoke and 1/2 of my life wasted on a fake persona that I fell in love with. That’s exactly 100% accurate, ZERO PERSONAL GROWTH on his part! What a shock to discover what hides behind his mask and to realize I never knew him! The person I loved didn’t exist! The whole marriage was nothing more than a manipulation from a creature that just uses people to get their own way! I woke up real fast when I discovered what a narcissist really is! I’m 71 years old now and I’m looking forward to living alone! There will be hell to pay when God gets a hold of him!

[@HipHop-vg7cd]

@@terrywade3696 it’s definitely a hard pill to swallow. I went through many stages of grief and being livid etc. I also had to look at my part and why was I so blind to his lies🤦🏼‍♀️ There’s definitely a trauma bond there esp given how I grew up with trauma. Your brain stops functioning like a normal person for real. I did so much research and I was shocked. It makes sense though because you’re living in such a lonely place or hell on earth at times. It’s like the art of war, people can adjust to almost anything…SADLY! GL to you and I pray you find peace and happiness now 🙏❤️

[@Twany1954]

Absolutely they are sadists and some are sociopaths 👹👈🏻

[@karynegough7564]

They’re criminally insane. I don’t know how they can live with themselves.

[@novairene6880]

They don’t know any different, so really can’t see how toxic they are. Started when they were very, very young. They don’t remember any other way of being, thinking, or feeling. To them, everyone else is the problem and they are normal.

[@fruitascension5089]

​@@novairene6880You are a narc-enabler.

[@lynnschaeferle-zh4go]

Run. They never ever change. They get worse and some do it just for the pain

[@Terri-vi5qb]

Right on! This is what happened at the end of our marriage! It didn't end well! It ended tragically!

[@rebekahjette6304]

⚠️⚠️⚠️My soon-to-be ex "changed", barely, for the two years before we separated and then said to me the weekend before he moved out, "We have been doing things your way for the last two years and that has got to change!"⚠️⚠️⚠️ My caution to people is expect them to be the 😈...better safe than sorry🙏🏼

[@maryhannah9685]

I think your channel is the only one I can watch and not get triggered. Something about the way you explain narcissism is perfect. Keep it up. Thank you.

[@AlwaysHope2019]

My ex knew he was ignoring me, but chose to make every lame excuse in the book . I told him it hurt my feelings, and he chose to keep ignoring me, but saying I didn’t do anything wrong, he was just going through other issues. I told him that really wasn’t an excuse, not to at least keep texting and keeping in touch . It hurt worse that he didn’t contact me after I explained my hurt feelings more than the original ghosting. Needless to say, I sent him a text explaining I did not want that in my life blocked and deleted him. I’m too far in life for these immature games His loss. I considered myself a wonderful friend.

[@StCloud-ns7vt]

The bastard knows. Its comes out during every post-abuse damage control hoover.

[@gwendolynwehage6336]

The narcissists in my life would never in a million years admit what they were doing even if the relationship would be mended because of his/her confession. They don't care about mending relationships they only care about controlling those for whom they feel jealous. We cannot help them, they get worse when we try to make them understand. I can recognize these kinds of people in just a short first-time visit, they all have ways about them that give them away.

[@sonyalee9358]

He gets upset when i bring up what he has done. He gets mad when i say he is always mad at me😂 Im the one that shoipdnt trust him! But he acts like im not to be trusted! Crazy..

[@AlwaysHope2019]

Typical😂

[@tanyadepoalo4312]

Yup!

[@maryhannah9685]

Lol all i ever asked for was a phone call a day to feel secure. Guess who barraged me with phone calls and baiting voicemails when i dared to break up? These people are clowns

[@BeTheLight624]

Excellent 100% what I experienced, same cycles…saved to re-watch narcs are not just narcs, they are mentally imbalanced - just like quitting smoking or drinking, change will only occur when they decide and commit to making a change in their life - the quick fix change he mentioned with the flowers etc is exactly as he stated, narcs do that only to placate you, to stop you from leaving etc, they will turn on a dime and start the old behavior right back up like you never had the I’m leaving conversation. Your best overall move is to cut your losses and get out asap and start healing and reclaiming your life. You decide…

[@andrerosekriel1127]

I understand what you’re saying, and you’re right - no one can "fix" someone who won’t see what they’re doing to themselves and others. Looking back, he always craved my full attention, like Oliver Twist asking, "Can I have some more?" He was quiet and reserved, while I was more outgoing. When we were alone, he was fine - unless something unknown to me triggered him before he came home. His mood would shift, and I, unfortunately, couldn’t let it go. This led to situations where he either hurt himself, or I became the target of verbal abuse. I believe he knew what he was doing. Sometimes when I called him out, he’d freeze, caught in the act, staring silently. Does he fit a label? I’m not sure. But I wonder if our lives as a family would have been better had I confronted the issue earlier, even with the drama it might have caused. I realize none of us are perfect, and if I’m out of line, I apologize. Thank you, and enjoy your day with your family. 🍀🍀

[@AlwaysHope2019]

God mine did that I am a nurse, and I would give him great advice on health concerns he would bring up, he would never take it, but yet he would get the same advice from a coworker, construction man and then bring to my attention how wonderful his advice was 😮left me speechless 😂

[@novairene6880]

Same!

[@madalinaelenapopa531]

Omg, this happened to me, too😅. He never took my advice as good or to follow, but even if a random person on the street would have told him the exact same thing, he would take it and brag about it as it would have been his.

[@AlwaysHope2019]

@@madalinaelenapopa531 it used to be frustrating, and then I just quit giving him advice😂

[@ThingsILove2266]

Or pass off comments you’ve made as their own revelations.

[@ModestLadyK]

Same 😂omg the demons are the same 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@ree3197]

Tbh.. to stay with a narcissist for so long is highly indictive of low self esteem.. I think whomever chooses to stay with even a reformed narcissist should, go to therapy, and figure out why they stayed with them for so long. Empower themselves to look back on all the narcissist has done, prior to their reformation, and decide, do you really want to be with this person still? The very same person who learned all of your pains and weaknesses over time, specifically to use them against you. Not to mention the possibility of regression in the future. Your reformed narcissist partner can't be the only one that's growing in the relationship, you should be too! And even if you belive they are making amazing progress against their narcissistic tendencies.. The wounds will never be completely healed.. Never feel guilty still making the decision to leave, For You! At least you'll know the warning signs in the future!!! 🙏🏾✨

[@sarcasticcat4982]

Some of us were still caught up in the WTF. Sometimes the NPD unravels slowly and it's hard to pin down. Mine said the right things usually but DID something completely different. I had to learn to stop listening and to start watching....

[@ree3197]

Lol.. I like the bit of acting you're doing here.. or imitating. You seem genuinely passionate about the subject. It's like holding a mirror up to our faces, because that was me exactly! Honestly kind of pitiful.. 😅💔✨

[@tanyadepoalo4312]

Yup. Mine brought me flowers the day after we got back together and a few days later started the same crap, it took 7 whole days for him to discard me again for the millionth time. I finally blocked him and he sent me several emails of the most vile mean and nasty words and accusations and told me we are done “forever” and he will be “actively dating other women and don’t bother us” I said “sounds good” and of course he had to rail in me a bit more after that. These people are horrid

[@Tonyamitchell5021]

Oo yes..yes..thts truth..now tht I done cut him off he trying to do the things he already know and knew I wanted..but after over 7 years and he done same thing over and over..changed couple weeks if tht long..jus so he knew I was back in the trap.. now ion go for it..he will nvr evr get me back in tht trap..I've long been gone..tries to hoover me and tht dnt work no more..all he can do is get mad and mad..then 10 minutes later bby ion even respond..no I Njoy my freedom

[@ladyvirgo013]

Truth 💯 The soon X husband knew exactly how much he was manipulating me. Im out after 12 years because he moved on with his coworker. Im free, just need the divorce finalized

[@nicholecornes1915]

Hell yes i left

[@Tonyamitchell5021]

👏🏽👏🏽Hell yeah..and gonna stay gone..I love MY FREEDOM

[@MrzBetsy92]

@rawmotivation what does it mean a covert narc doesn't fight against any of the boundaries given(only text communication , me wanting to live apart from him,) but when it comes to the money he earns he has taken complete control from me to start paying the bills himself after over 20 yrs of having me do it?l He has decided that he will no longer give me cash in hand but will continue to "provide" for me by doing it himself.

[@edwardthompson5061]

Can you start referring to he or her because there are many covert narcissist women. Thank you really enjoy the channel.

[@frankdigiovanni3666]

I’ve mentioned it to him as well!! He needs to refer NARCISSISTS as MEN AND WOMEN, not just men. He would attract a male audience if he did. I’m dealing with a Covert narcissist who did everything he said in this video and she’s a women!!!!!

[@KayJay-xw5in]

I've noticed that too which made me look for neutral channels, but his information is very important and informative 👍

[@AlwaysHope2019]

He’s explained this before as to why he does that. Ben is a great counselor i’ve followed him for a long time now I am healed, but I still like to listen to what he says from time to time

[@AlwaysHope2019]

Thank you Ben for this great teaching

[@melissasymonds1523]

He uses “him” because he is one himself and therefore he understands the male narc perspective .. a lot of others do the same because the majority are male they’ve found - u can google female narc videos or just know the behaviour is interchangeable

[@nicholecornes1915]

People of the lie

[@tanyadepoalo4312]

Yes!!! I just finished reading that book! So eye opening snd a must read! This world is run by people of the lie. Hence all the wars and turmoil we are inflicted with.

[@monalisam1]

I don't agree with you when you say the np is aware about himself, he doesn't always do things on purpose, right? He might be focused on his crap and he might not be paying attention to what he is doing to you. Sure. But to be aware means you are aware about what you are doing to others exactly in the moment you are doing it. It's better to say he is self absorbed. But of course for a narcissist it sounds better to say, I am self aware. You just forget about focusing on the consequences of your actions for others. This is selfish isn't it? Some spiritual teachers might be able to give some more information about awareness.

[@fruitascension5089]

I appreciate your content, but are you actually making money on your own condition that brought years of terrible anguish and suffering to your one and only, your "beloved", beautiful wife??

[@RawMotivations]

If you are asking is this my full time job that supports my family and brings healing and transformation to others then yes.