5 Red Flags to Watch for When Dating a Widower

[@DatingaWidower]

What red flags did Abel have when he started dating again? Get your free e-copy of Abel's memoir Room for Two and find out for yourself. Simply sign up for his newsletter to get the free copy of the book as well as the latest on his new books, videos, and other projects. More information at www.abelkeogh.com/newsletter-2/

[@8165Pat]

My husband was a widower when we met 5 years ago. His family has never accepted me & other people want me to be a carbon copy of his late wife. I have maintained healthy boundaries & good mental health throughout the time we have been together. Married 3 years & doing well. I do not compete with a ghost. He knows I am my own woman. He also knows his life is better with me in it. No one defines our marriage but us. Had we let that happen, we would be divorced.

[@leowilson1791]

Oh really I'm sorry for that it's my pleasure to meet you here..!

[@KatWoodland]

He was ready

[@jennamarsh6137]

I really like what he said near the end--it's about choosing the past or choosing a future.

[@Diamondgyrl29]

I'm dating a widower now and actually knew his deceased wife. I don't allow him to compare me to her because we are by no means alike in any way. I have expressed to him that I'm not her and that I don't want to be compared to her. I actually enjoy him as a person, he's fun, loving, caring, mature and I feel he can move on if he focuses on us. I really hope this works out as his children are not ok with him dating me but that's something that we have to deal with along the way. Our happiness should not be based on grown children they have their own life and we want to share ours.

[@RG-hf4et]

Where are you at now?

[@gigib3734]

We are still dating and our love has gotten stronger. He is all about us and I am so happy he is in my life.❤

[@lalanishelton9217]

I have a question. My partner whose wife died 11 years ago still refers to her as "my wife" when talking about her. Even when I am sitting right next to him. I have asked him to refer to her as his late wife. But he typically ends up referring to her as "my wife." What should I do?

[@laura2842]

Yikes! I dated a widower for 8 years, a long time ago, and all of the red flags you mention were there, he even had photos of the late wife inside the closet!!!! why did I think I had to give him time!!!! needless to say that relationship ended. Of course after I broke up with him he got in a hurry to bring me flowers, get anxious and asking me to marry him. It was too late, and I am glad it didn't happen!!!! I think I was taken for granted!!!! Lerned a good lesson, I did. Thank you!!!

[@maridevipam1554]

For me .. he had her photos everywer in his Hse Countless .. he wake up and see her photo as first view .. so he placed them Juz right infront of his bed .. and pray to her .. Set her pic as profile in media’s Includes her name in his id .. like mails .. yea the marriage he had .. was for 24 years .. she passed away .. I can actualy understand the love .. it was also the reason I fall for him .. likewise for me I have been betrayed .. and lived alone for 18 years .. When my mom passed away .. my aunts suggested me to seek some one .. my children were like 17 and 14 So I tried .. with hope I say with hope .. but after 2-3 years dating .. I realy feel I have lost my values .. I’m blamed for asking questions.. he even calls me question bank .. the worst of all .. a simple q .. can turn into a months of ignorance ( silent treatment) And I spent my nights sleepless .. crying .. waking up and mourning for my love .. I really do need help here Because it’s difficult to move on .. makes me always available for him .. I really couldn’t figure out what happen to the boldness in me .. I mean like been surviving for 18 years single.. I lost myself

[@johnkeith2450]

You dodged a bullet

[@laura2842]

@@johnkeith2450 indeed!

[@laura2842]

@@maridevipam1554 oh oh oh, remember you are enough!!!! you have value and it is better to live on your own that to mourn a person that emotionally mistreats you. Hugs! I know it is hard but doable!

[@maridevipam1554]

@@laura2842 thank you dear

[@terrycoleman4572]

Overall we are a interracial couple. His first wife was white. I am Black. We are very comfortable with each other. His children call me mom. I look forward to this new life.

[@MsCliffmaddox]

I am a widower and dating a great lady again, great video, I passed I think all these red flags I think. Hope my new girl agrees.

[@DatingaWidower]

I Hope so too!

[@RG-hf4et]

Nice to see a widower here listening to Abe's advice!

[@crackerjack4u]

My husband passed away, it will be a year the 24th of October. I started dating a widower of 6 years, about 8 months after my husband passed away. I can honestly say that he was the oddest, uncaring, most confusing man I have ever met in my life. He said many things about what he wanted in a relationship, but his actions told an entirely different story. Anyway, it was a short dating experience to say the least that I now chalk up to a huge learning experience.

[@sandratoumberlin2504]

Hi Abel. I have VERY recently started talking to a widower online. He's 68, I'm 65. We live in the opposite side of the USA . He lost his wife of 21 year's, 3 yrs, 7 months ago, from COVID. Since it is so new, I don't ask a lot about of hard questions yet. U've given me a lot of things to ponder. We've discussed our pasts & he seems to have been able to move on. I've been alone for 16 years, by choice, so I'm ready to love again. I've been scammed on here twice in the past 2 year's, that I decided to "get back in the saddle". Lol. We'll see how this plays out. Ur channel has helped me understand the dynamics of widowdom. Lol

[@cschulz9865]

Pictures. Yes, you wouldn't accept it from a divorced man, but somehow you have to accept it from a widower. This is an awesome video.

[@CM-sy3to]

I think a single "family photo" on the wall, IF there are children (underage or adult), is a good thing. Kids need to know that their deceased mother or father is being honored as such. If there are no children to the first marriage, there is no reason for a surviving spouse to keep up photos of a deceased spouse after "falling in love" and marrying a second spouse.

[@lita4458]

Why? Because his or her love did not die with their spouse . It was not a divorce, it was a death. I totally disagree with any woman or man that can't handle a few pictures in the home. Their children - or grandchildren - should be able to come to the house and know their loved one is not forgotten. This is totally a separate issue from not making a new love feeling like they are important. I am not a widow or a widower but I totally disagree with this concept.

[@cschulz9865]

@@lita4458 My life is much better not tolerating it. I wouldn't tolerate it from a divorced man either. What if the man didn't want the divorce? Still ok? It's bullshit and life is better without being stuck in the corner while a ghost takes the show. Nah, you go ahead. I'm nobody's back up act.

[@Sugabonemcfall]

@@lita4458 I think it’s best to keep pictures in children rooms only or in a safe place where he can look at them whenever he wants. Doesn’t need to be in the living room and halls, that makes the new spouse feel like a mistress, like they don’t belong there and intruded on another family.

[@phalynwilliams4119]

@@cschulz9865, I agree with you. Some of these red flags 🚩 apply to divorced men too. Some of these widowers were not very good husbands in the first place and they feel guilty and guilt is also a part of their grief. If the man is insensitive to your needs I would presume that his wife had some of the same or similar issues with him. Why would they expect a decent to be okay with being treated like a mistress. Hiding in the closet, etc., is nonsense.

[@saschaspring2198]

Was married to a widower for 24 years; divorced for religious reasons, primarily. Three years later I meet another widower -- completely unlike my former -- wears his wedding band on right hand, speaks of his deceased wife constantly and longingly, has pictures of her in his home, and is clearly not ready .... though it's going on four years and he's had multiple short term relationships in between. I just can't do it. I simply cannot be the shadow girl again -- sadly.

[@fredgrove7886]

Wow, never thought of the pictures being a shrine. That is a great thing to look at if it truly is! Thanks for sharing!Fg

[@juliapurdy3950]

Another thing to be aware of is the likelihood that something in the environment will trigger his buried grief, take him back to the "good old days" with the love of his life... all while you are standing there. This happened when a show came on tv about doo-wop male singing groups, which he and his wife loved to dance to. In fact, at the beginning he asked me if I liked doo-wop and I said Sure, probably - having no clue how important it was to him. So when the show came on, he actually had a meltdown right in front of me, looking at his wife's portrait photo on the end table (the only thing he kept on display, as far as I could see), breaking into tears, crying out how he loved her so much, then becoming glued to the tv and saying he would ask his daughter to find the record they were advertising and get it for him. This was the only time he really broke down, but while I had nothing against his memories, she had died 3 years before and yet he started referring to how she did things, their little inside jokes, etc. as if she might walk in the door at any moment. I also have reason to believe he believed he would be reunited with her in heaven, she was waiting for him. What started as a wonderful, fun, loving friendship fizzled completely after about 4 months when he decided he knew what I wanted but he couldn't give it to me (no explanation or discussion with me about it - it was his final say). I feel pretty sad for him, I did fall in love for a lot of reasons and now I show my love and sympathy for him just by leaving him alone, per his terms.

[@RG-hf4et]

Be grateful for his red flag meltdown after only 4 months of dating. That was a signal for you to move on without him even having to say one word. I wasted 5 years and later found out he was having hidden meltdowns and was not honest. I can never get those years back.

[@ohdear2275]

@@ShwetaRecreates Get going now! You can do this. Thank God it was only 7 months and not years. You are fortunate. May you be further blessed!

[@jos3roth475]

Maybe he realized how cold and inconsiderate you were towards his grief. People pick up on that selfish BS regardless of how much others try to hide it.

[@phalynwilliams4119]

@@jos3roth475, If you think that it was appropriate for this man to meltdown like that then there is something wrong with you. This guy should not be dating. He needs to remain alone with his grief. It is good that it happened within the first few months of the relationship and that they broke up. This lady deserves a man who is ready to love ❤️ her. She doesn’t deserve to be a placeholder or to settle for less.

[@RG-hf4et]

​@jos3roth475 What are you talking about? The man was still grieving & shouldn't have been dating. Most widowers start dating TOO SOON to help fill a void & then you have the nerve to say she was cold & inconsiderate ?!!! The inconsiderate & selfish one is the widower dating too soon looking for a human bandaid!! Would you like to date someone still crying & upset about a relationship that is no more?

[@jdimon8717]

You are an effective communicator. Thanks for using your experience to help us out.

[@dordil]

Thank you.Very eye opening for those that want to move on.

[@anthonyanderson2189]

Hello how are you doing?...you look so beautiful and attractive and also have a lovely smile

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@JanicePariza]

Thank you, you have been a great help for me.

[@johnfayan308]

Hi

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@jenifferkimondo710]

Am an African woman aged 50yrs..separated...am on this platform seeking for a soul mate..am mature,loving,and very loyal...if you are widower looking for someone whom you can have a second chance with am here..May God make us connect with the right person

[@latinaalma1947]

Not a way to meet a person ...its just not its a place for advice and insight.

[@JanicePariza]

I do not know what I would have done without your advice Abel, thank you! Thank you for helping us!

[@DatingaWidower]

Glad you've found them helpful, Janice.

[@JanicePariza]

Very helpful, I just finished 'Room For Two' and am on to your next book! Thank you...and I might add that you were so very kind to privately email me previously with advice when I asked your opinion...I have passed on your KZbin links, you are the best 'counsellor' I have had and your videos are so right on! I have never had the chance to express my sympathy about the loss of your wife and daughter, Hope...thank you for helping others in a genuine way! Happy New Year to Marathon Girl and your children!

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@deanmyers9936]

​@@richardbradshaw7830555

[@HopeConpiracy]

I was married for 13 years and my wife passed away a little over a moth ago. I personally have found a wonderful women who genuinely makes me happy. This was very spontaneous but I want to show her off to the world. I can understand how some people may be distant and not want to seem like they are not mourning the death of their late wife..... But I don't care what other people think. If my kids and I are happy, why should I care about other peoples opinions. I'm a good man and I found a good women. I have 1 picture of our wedding i keep up on the TV stand cause I'm not a cold asshole. I have 3 children that should be able to have a picture of their mother to remember her by.... and in all honesty if the girl i found didn't like it I really don't care. But luckily she thinks it's sweet. I am only 33, I feel like you are talking to older widowers or very sensitive men. Maybe I'm just lucky, or maybe I'm an asshole.... Either way, I am happy, my kids are happy, the women is happy.... and everyone else, if they have a problem can kick rocks.

[@RG-hf4et]

I think most readers here are older so having young children is quite a different situation. I wouldn't mind the wife's picture up for the kids sake at all, I think it is good. However, I think maybe on a bookshelf rather than on the tv set. To be honest, I don't think I would be 100% comfortable watching tv and always seeing a wedding picture. This is just another perspective. Best of luck to you.

[@tajmahalbybrii]

way to go...life is precious and short..live in the present

[@miztwic]

I would not be happy with a wedding picture..one with her and her kids would make me more.at.peace

[@RG-hf4et]

Very good point - no wedding pics.

[@miztwic]

@@RG-hf4et And the adult children should put the pics of their Mom in their own homes. Otherwise it's trying to keep the widowers house a shrine to the old life when he should be embracing the new life. And I may be a jealous Hag, but I still believe they are no longer married, therefore no old wedding pics up. I wanted my widower to start putting new pictures up of us and his kids and us with my kids but he refused.

[@cschulz9865]

I found this video a long time after launching my widower. I've never been happier. Feeling like a backup act appeals to some women, but not others. It is humiliating. The in-laws become tentacles that never accept it and act as instruments to ghost out the new "mistress." You can't have these people in your life if you want to protect your lady. If the man doesn't acknowledge any efforts of sabotage from the in-laws, you need to launch him. I had a sister of the late wife actually offer to set him up on a visit when I wasn't there. And he never mentioned my name in objection! YES YES YES LET THE WORLD KNOW! PROTECT HER! We remained friends, and now I hear comments like "my life was better with you in it." Well, if you'd have said that to your circle, we may have had a chance. The "man" in this video is a real man, with a great protective nature. Don't wait for a lady you love to flat line before you start CPR. :D Great video, and thank you!

[@letricblue]

Cares because of judgement, first person you date is taking brunt of peoples shock. Everyone has an opinions about what the correct time is to get over past spouse. Also its hard to talk singularly about your past if you shared your last 30 years with someone else. It was a past that included 2 people.

[@Tbn48ibp]

Wonderful insight. Thanks Abel!! Love ya!!

[@sheliamoreno1211]

This is such a true video. I lost my fiancee' last summer and other than meeting his family, everything said in this video he did to me. He died last summer due to a blood clot hitting his heart. The videos are really helping me get over my grieving for him. He was never really ready to go on with anyone and now I know for sure, even though he gave me an engagement ring and we were to be married this June. I should of either talked to him long ago or sent him away and not taken him back. Thanks for the videos that you present. They are really helping me!!

[@ElliFrance]

I was dating a widower who said to me “but I will always love my wife”. I asked him why he was going out with me if he loved his wife. He did a lot of sweet talk and invested in us which made me stay. He was always sending mixed messages, saying one thing such as “I will put you first”, doing another. He did not walk the talk. The advice I would like to give to other people based on my experience is not to give too many second chances just because the person you are with is a widower. Widowers or divorcees or whatever we are, we are adults first and foremost and we are responsible for our behavior. If the widower you are dating, repeatedly does not want to commit to you, but drags you into a situationship instead, have the courage to step out and walk away from the situationship as it does not suit you. Don’t lose yourself because you are empathetic towards the widower.

[@dordil]

Lost my husband 3 years ago and I'm in my 60's and part of me died. Very difficult finding myself.

[@jdimon8717]

I am very sorry to hear that, Dorothy. Although some things won't be the same, I hope it will somehow get better.

[@johnfayan308]

Hi Dorothy sorry for your lost

[@martinsaunders7925]

Changing from loneliness to aloneness is a key. The door opens on the rest of life

[@manomoneysubramaniam254]

i am 70 my hubby pass on 5 yrs ago n we been married 45 yrs n missing him alot we were healthy active person n happy together n now i so loney

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@ianc64]

My wife of 15 years died 3 months ago, I have been married 3 times, once for 7 years (too young) once for 3 months (OMG that was a mistake) but I don't feel the need to get in a relationship again, I am going to spend the rest of my life doing what I want when I want, not in a selfish way, and certainly not in a, don't care for anyone else or their feelings way. Just want to watch the cricket when I want (going to South Africa this Christmas) and play poker when I want!

[@shereeclinton8741]

My late husband was a widower. He never made me feel awkward. He always celebrated my difference. Now im in that boat. We chatted about me moving on when he was sick. I can not find as much info on widows. crazy.

[@DatingaWidower]

Most of my advice for widowers also applies to widows.

[@pradeeprao2697]

Hi

[@dianemitchell6909]

Very helpful.

[@leahjones1285]

After six months of dating this widower, he proposed to me. His wife has been gone almost 2 years. But when I walk into his house, it looks and feels like she just left to go to the grocery store and she’ll be right back. I’m just short of tripping over her house slippers. Everything of hers is still there. Right where she left it. I’ve kindly told him on two occasions, how awkward and uncomfortable this is for me and it needs to change or I will not come back to his house. Would you give me the same advice as to giving him the choice/ultimatum, and then walk away if He won’t let go of things?

[@leowilson1791]

Hello friend 👋 how are you feeling today hope you're having a wonderful day over there.!!

[@Tbn48ibp]

I experienced the same exact thing. I thought to myself if he is so ready to move forward and ask me to marry him yet the house remains a living memorial. When I told Him I was uncomfortable living in HER house he agreed to take some things down. He wanted to leave a sunbeam glass on table with her face that dangles from it on a glass!! Then he said, “please put your finishing touches in this house, redo landscaping and whatever you want and if anything ever happens to me, I will make sure the grown kids don’t kick you out.” I absolutely had it!! Left him and I’m so glad I did. I miss him terrible and truly loved him but I loved MYSELF more! I was constantly being conformed To what he wanted. His friends, his plans, his parties, his kids, etc etc. Even on his Facebook account he had a main photo of him with his late wife and kids and just below it was a photo of me with him!! I had it. I was tired of being number 2!! After 10 months of dating him, I knew he wasn’t changing!! So my advice to you is…walk!! Run….run forest run!! Choose your sanity over anything or anyone!! Love yourself more.

[@Tbn48ibp]

My experience is let him know it upsets you and if he doesn’t change..run forest run…I feel like my guy has been making all the changes and doing all he needs to so I won’t leave but I want him to want to do it without being told. Ugh. I’ve been with him now 1 year and we Have had a lot to work out. I worry that he’s in a rush to marry for financial Reasons and other reasons. So I’m Trying to take my time. I’m Leaning on not staying with him because I feel like the changes aren’t genuine. He’s all about himself and often offish and seems like he’s putting on fake acts. We shall see. Time will tell

[@RG-hf4et]

​. if you have "a lot to work out", then stop giving your precious time to this man. If he was truly serious, there wouldn't be a lot to work out after a year. I wasted 5 years hoping things would "work out". Learn from me. Would you do the same with a divorced man?

[@charlottebruce979]

​@Tbn48ibp I'm so nearly ready to do this after 20 months of dating, I've been very patient and understanding and we've been so happy. But it's been so hard to walk into his house and see wedding photos and her pottery and her shoes in the wardrobe but I say nothing at all. Her daughter his step daughter is the spitting image of her mum and they get on so well it's hard to see and we can't even marry something I've longed to do because his wife made it so he'd have to sell his half of the house If he did. So many things make me cry yet he's the one who lost someone. I feel like I'm in competition with a ghost. Not sure what to do.

[@bdcochran01]

Me? As a widower. I have no shrines in the house. Never speak or spoke about the late wife with any girlfriend. Never related to people at work or socially about my marital status. Hearing someone talk about a deceased spouse is a bad as someone talking about the "EX" this and the "EX" that.

[@butterflylady8875]

Great advice, thank you so much❤️

[@Christian_Girl120]

There's a guy from out of state who wanted to meet me right away face to face. I'm in Ohio. I can't even be sure the facebook pictures are his. I'm paranoid. His wife died 3 years ago he says and has a 5 year old son. I blocked him. I felt guilty, wondering if he was a good guy and I hurt him. Then it hit me we were only texting a week and a half! Maybe it's for the best.

[@maryrosed8475]

Sounds like a scam. Most scam artists have 1 child. I met a guy like this on the Internet. He said he had a son of 11 yrs. Anyway to cut a long story short he was a scam artist from Ghana. He looked for money after 4 weeks! I knew immediately it was a scam.

[@suebrown7032]

Amy P you absolutely did the right thing

[@megpike9657]

A question: what if the widower keeps posting photos and “ miss you every day baby ” on his facebook page- That feels like a red flag 🚩

[@DatingaWidower]

It IS a red flag. A big one.

[@megpike9657]

@@DatingaWidower - every birthday, christmas, posts missing you verses he finds on Facebook

[@megpike9657]

I think i will keep my distance

[@DatingaWidower]

@@megpike9657 Good idea. Also, watch this video for more context www.abelkeogh.com/blog/category/widowers-and-social-media

[@lesliestrothers4055]

How long widowed???

[@Tina-lo2ms]

Thank you for sharing this video..

[@thrutherhythm44]

I briefly dated a widower who was hiding his real name from everyone while using a real-sounding stage name (he is a musician). I assumed it was his real name up until the end when other things started to feel off. When questioned, he got very angry and blocked me on all social media platforms. I came to find some members of his late wife’s family were very suspicious of how she died. “Falling” out of the car he was driving, after all, sounds a bit fishy. I’m not sure if he was hiding his real name to hide from her family members or to prevent those he dates from discovering this information.

[@suebrown7032]

Alyssa H yea theres something not clear here

[@tajmahalbybrii]

run...run...run

[@avaelizabeth4808]

what if he is fine alone but easily influenced by adult kids or friends who dislike anyone who is not the late wife and make up excuses as to why whoever he is currently dating is flawed.

[@DatingaWidower]

Sounds like he's not ready for a serious relationship.

[@avaelizabeth4808]

@@DatingaWidower Thank you for responding. Love truly can be blinding ,until one begins to grow and work on themselves.

[@Tbn48ibp]

Same situation here. Totally influenced by others. I say walk. No run. I don’t think my guy will Change. It’s a character flaw! Weakness…so I say choose your sanity !! If he won’t change …adios

[@RG-hf4et]

These widowers that have no backbone early on won't have a backbone later on as you ladies give them your precious time & attention. I had it all - adult only child married son giving him a hard time, ex-in-laws still very much in the picture, close friends living nearby "couldn't see him with anyone else"....Instead of standing up to comments & other opinions, the widower would be passive as to not rock the boat but yet came home & told me everything these other people said. I knew he could not control what other people said, but he could have & should have set boundaries & he wouldn't. I finally walked away. You need & want a man/partner in your life who has your back no matter what.

[@leslierusgrove164]

I think it's also important to remember that a shrine is not just a picture or so. My father-in-law was widowed and remarried to a widow. They each have a picture or so of their first spouse. And my sister-in-law was widowed and remarried a widower. She has children by her first husband. He never had children. She has a picture in her home of her late husband. Don't forget, those children are still living in her home. It's just food for thought... (At the same time, I don't see anything that I would consider a shrine... There aren't massive amounts of pictures...)

[@anthonyanderson2189]

Hello how are you doing?...you look so beautiful and attractive and also have a lovely smile

[@leslierusgrove164]

And you are a red flag... 🤷

[@anthonyanderson2189]

Okay how are you doing?

[@asamples333]

Late to this party, but it would be weird for a widower/widow to try to erase their previous spouse, especially if there are children from that union or they were together for a long time

[@elizabethleyden892]

If someone ever said "the late wife" I'd run a mile before anything else. What a horrible expression.

[@DatingaWidower]

What expression would you prefer?

[@elizabethleyden892]

@@DatingaWidower My wife, your wife, his wife, her wife, whatever. The wife just seems like an impersonal object.

[@anzhelikashtanko7220]

:) funny.

[@saschaspring2198]

Cannot agree more....very off putting.

[@MyHelga1]

I agreed on a lot of what you said but the late wife isn't something I would say either. The late husband yikes..... no way. That popped out like a sore thumb. I would be proud to say or hear the name. Like Michael or Mary.

[@charityd2752]

What if he is driving by ur house uninvited? No I don't live on a busy street.

[@DatingaWidower]

@@charityd2752 🚩🚩🚩

[@cheyluv6256]

Im dating a guy who wife passed march of this year. Hes now a single father of 3 all 10 and under. I like him and would like more, but I dont feel like hes ready. To make things more interesting he has the shrines in the house and even when you walk up to his door outside on a wreath with a photo of her. Also she passed on my birthday. I just don’t know what to do, im willing to be a bonus mom and love him the way I know how but im wondering if i should just walk away.

[@DatingaWidower]

@@cheyluv6256 Trust your gut. He's not ready.

[@cheyluv6256]

@ thank you

[@charlottebruce979]

He probably wants a mother to his children and misses sex, you deserve to be number 1 all the way never compromise on that ever find an emotional available man, in the words of the late Princess Diana there were three of us in the marriage and it got crowded!

[@RG-hf4et]

A picture on a wreath on the front door????? Yikes! I truly hoped you walked away. This man has his hands full with 3 kids under 10. He's not a good candidate for dating anyone right now.

[@phyllissnook]

My husband passed away 5 years ago and I know he wouldn't want me to be alone. However, there is no way to find anyone in my rural area! I tried on line dating and finally gave up because I was scammed so I am wondering how in the world anyone can help me in this area? I am in my 60's and just withering away though thankfully I have my writing and cats for company!

[@DatingaWidower]

Hi Phyllis. Any chance of relocating to a more populous area?

[@Christian_Girl120]

Phyllis Snook I know the feeling. I've never been married but was afraid I would get scammed by this widower who contacted me on facebook. I ended up blocking him. I felt bad but was scared.

[@samueljdean71]

I understand how it is i have the same situation i'm 60 years old and so tired of being alone and watching the year's go by. The only thing i have is my computer after year's a girl that i knew in high school had a crush on me she found me on facebook and a relation ship started to develop but i can't get my wife out my heart and mind Some people say's that i will all way's love her and to move on which is true but my problem is that i'm still in love with her even that she is no longer here

[@margiebaez8299]

Phyllis Snook i understand your situation completely I’m a widow for 4yrs now also tried on line dating and there was one or two who i could talk to then they tried to scam me and when i met someone i felt so afraid to get involved for fear of the same thing happening again so i let him go but then realized how much i really cared about him but now he’s moved on to someone he knew before so i feel like it’s so hard to find a man who is honest for me it’s all about honesty and I was married for 43 yrs and it’s so hard to start all over again but I’ll keep trying and put it in Gods hands Don’t give up there is someone out there for you I’m sure Good luck 🍀

[@gayscott1899]

I lost my husband almost 2 years. I think about another relationship, but I am scared of that. I think I should set my sites on widower sense I am a widow. What do you think? I love your channel.

[@MaryH-id4ib]

We are all going thru the same😢

[@lisathompson673]

So much I am unsure of!

[@malou0764]

I am a widowed , thanks for sharing

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@malou0764]

@@richardbradshaw7830 this is life move on and be happy♥️

[@LillianWaller]

I have a question about How The widower removes pictures momentos more memorabilia. What should he do with it? I don't want my widower to throw him in a Box So to say. I feel that that would be disrespectful in a sense to the late wife.

[@leowilson1791]

Hello friend 👋 how are you feeling today hope you're having a great day over there.??

[@maryroberts6921]

It's his past and you are his future. If it doesn't bother you to have her pic all over - well then so be it. Good luck

[@asamples333]

I feel the same way. I think when they're ready to move pics around, it should be when they're ready. The journey you go through with him is kind of intertwined with his grief journey.

[@sleepsmartsmashstress740]

Given that "falling in love" is akin to a mental illness or an addiction, people who become so afflicted are almost certain to ignore EVERY red flag to talking about red flags is waste of time.

[@JeanBakula]

You were able to date three months after the death of your wife? Did you care about her at all?

[@leowilson1791]

Hello friend 👋 how are you feeling today hope you're having a great day over there.?

[@maximiliendelhusa4093]

so as a widower i am supposed to take every single picture, memory, off the walls and hide them as if it never happened? basically erase her from the past? how is that healthy? and why would i ever be with someone who cannot accept and respect my love towards my late wife...dont get it.

[@partner230]

Maybe she dated you in the 1rst place because she respected how much you loved your wife..and wanted that kind of love ? Not knowing that you were never gonna give it to her!.. Find a special place for her! But you need to put your energy and love into the present! The present relationship! You both deserve it! I never met any widower or widows in New relationships saying I should have grieved longer! Just my opinion. Hugs to you for healing. I know it's so very hard.

[@leratogao2267]

@@partner230 exactly how I feel about my ex he didn’t love me at all

[@eso8171]

Taking down the pictures doesn't mean erase memories. It's respect to your partner and living in the present. Relatioships are about compromise.

[@maryroberts6921]

"Do you want me to completely erase her" those were the exact same words my x-widower told me. And it's not that I want her erased, after all I have an x ( that's alive) and I still have pictures - but they are all put up in my past folder. It's about being your one and only in your present life, that you love and respect and try to create a "new: life with. There should be only ONE not TWO person. The other person is your past and you need to keep them and their memories in your past. I heard something that I think sums it up.- he needs to stop looking behind him, because for one thing, he's not waking that way -. So as much as it hurt, I had to move on ; he was not ready and I'm not willing to be a band-aide

[@RG-hf4et]

@maximiliendelhusa4093 You want a threesome & not a new future with someone new. Good luck with that.

[@barbrathompson9798]

Got over background , msg very good msg,, thanks

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@lc2296]

Thank you..

[@lilidyer9376]

What about if he introduced you to all his family and his kids... And his late wife's brother. But he's scared to introduce me to her parents...

[@DatingaWidower]

Being scared is normal. Question is whether he has the courage to do it anyway.

[@tjlord67]

I wish I would’ve seen this when dating. I overlooked the shrine (24x36” ‘bust portrait hanging above television for months..,& so much more) trying to be empathetic. We would have been married 5 years- separated one month before anniversary. All these flags are still present and have created animosity in him towards me. All his standards of what a wife should be are based on his late wife. I didn’t see much of that til now. We’ve been separated 6 weeks now, I don’t know what is in store. I love him, but he despises me because I’m not what a wife should be. I can’t change ‘me’ to be the kind of wife she was. Is there any hope? Sadly, I’m heartbroken yet (now) understand why he despises me so.

[@Tbn48ibp]

Choose YOU. Love yourself more than this idiot that doesn’t deserve ya. To Heck with him! You must be number one. I have had something similar and I’m so so sick of it.

[@tanyagaranzuay9454]

Dating a widower for almost 4 months now. He has not yet introduce me to his family or friends. Do you think is still too soon? I have talked to him about it, he says he ia not ready yet but that it doesnt mean that he will never will. Honestly I dont know how to feel about it. Any advice? What is a good time limit to see if he is ready or not to introduce me? Thank you, I am loving your videos.

[@DatingaWidower]

If you're in an exclusive relationship he needs to introduce you to family and friends. If he can't do that he's not ready.

[@tanyagaranzuay9454]

@@DatingaWidower I ended the relationship yesterday. I told him that maybe he just wanted companionship, and I deserved more than that. He told me that he knew I needed more. 😕

[@DatingaWidower]

@@tanyagaranzuay9454 You did the right thing. Stay strong.

[@tanyagaranzuay9454]

@@DatingaWidower how to know if he deserves a second chance?

[@DatingaWidower]

@@tanyagaranzuay9454 There's a video about that very subject kzbin.info/www/bejne/bGiQaX2nicmCrqc

[@margiebaez8299]

Very good advice Thk u

[@johnfayan308]

Hello

[@margiebaez8299]

John Fayan who are you

[@johnfayan308]

@@margiebaez8299 Am John an unknown friend from youtube,

[@margiebaez8299]

John Fayan so Hello to you John Fayan

[@margiebaez8299]

John Fayan so what made you reach out to me of all people

[@darlenelavigne8106]

I wouldn't wants to be someone Dirty little secret..

[@HUMBFIONAPAL]

O

[@Tbn48ibp]

My widower and I are officially on a break. His adult daughters are very manipulative and he seems to invite these women along with others into our personal issues constantly. It’s like he needs others’ opinions to function. I feel like I’m In a group relationship. Like I’m in a fishbowl. I truly love this man but I think it’s gonna be a fight

[@RG-hf4et]

If you feel like you have to "fight", do yourself a favor & run. He should not be sharing your relationship issues with ANYONE. This is trouble all over the place. Run. Don't fight for him. No group relationship. Sounds like he has no backbone - therefore, he isn't ready for a serious relationship. The daughters are going to win this bc the guy is making this a foursome. Your relationship will never work unless he keeps the daughters out of his business & sets boundaries with them. My widower was doing the same nonsense with his adult son who was a nasty person to me. I read the widower the riot act. It worked for a while. But the widower caved & started kissing up to the son & I ended it. I am not going to be #2 after a grown married son.

[@cherilcooper289]

Thank you I already know...

[@midnightblue117]

Would like to hear about memorial tattoos that someone of us have to look at.

[@DatingaWidower]

Here you go! kzbin.info/www/bejne/a5fUk3aslrdooMk

[@midnightblue117]

@@DatingaWidower Thank you!

[@mitranikrou5507]

Hi, please help me . My widower daughter 41years old and son 45 years after 15 months still don’t want to meet me , and I wanted to get married and he said maybe but now he doesn’t want to married ever to anyone, if I knew wouldn’t date him but I love him and it hearts me to leave him what should I do

[@mitranikrou5507]

Ella thank you for your caring and respond , actually he is on the RV trip with her daughter . It’s going to be more than two weeks . I’m trying hard to understand and patient, she is alone and never married, he is trying to build up good relationships they never had when her mom was alive with her . It’s not easy , and it is painful to be in the side .

[@janetnorton6598]

Run....

[@cherilcooper289]

He wants you to dress in her clothes.. Run... Cause there will be clothes he tries to give you... His other wife's clothes.. Run.. Here's your sign..

[@anzhelikashtanko7220]

WOW!!! It can happen?

[@truelytruely5478]

Ok. Now I'm concerned. He offered lots of clothes to me. I really didnt feel uncomfortable about it. In fact it made me feel a connection to his wife. As if she was a friend. I may be really wrong here.

[@ronwright2571]

@@truelytruely5478 Yes time to question this,I dated a lady that we went on vacation places her and her husband went to,tried to get me to do things activities together ,I told her I wasnt him I'm my own man,I loved her but it didnt work out

[@luvstexas2]

The shrine my boyfriend has is his late wife's urn and a toy teddy bear he gave her on his dresser.. we have been together a year he also has a picture of them kissing in his office, both make me uncomfortable, I have told him how I feel doesn't seem to matter to him he doesn't want to change this.

[@cillad22]

That’s sad… kissing … geez … pict a diff photo

[@RG-hf4et]

I hope you are not with this guy

[@dorothyseelig6037]

If have been dating a widower for awhile and still refers to he and his late wife as we. Is this a,red flag?

[@DatingaWidower]

Could be. Have you talked to him about it?

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@freedmm3122]

Yes

[@MetaPhysStore0770]

I suggestion, get a new mattress😂😂😂

[@messenger2102]

I am having someone say to me...You act like, you are stubborn just like, I feel like I am arguing with my late wife. But the thing is we are not arguing, he is having... I think flashbacks. His late wife and I both had the same sign and they did not get along in the 25 years they were together. I am so tired of being compared to his late wife when I say something that he doesn't agree with. He will turn something small into a...you don't agree with me you are acting just like her thing. The sad thing is this is done over the phone. I haven't seen him in over 25 years and we are both found out we are widowers in the last few years we live in different states and are looking forward to seeing each other again. Plus I knew his wife but I never got to know him. But with all of this...you are just like her thing...I am done.

[@DatingaWidower]

If he's comparing you to the late wife, that's not good on any level. Ending things is the right move.

[@MariaLopez-hc2nm]

Run girl...fast...

[@messenger2102]

I am just seeing your message...Thanks. Guess what!!!!... he stopped comparing me to his late wife once I put my foot down. He's knowns that, that is the last time he is going to say that to me.

[@ChristinaOstil115]

He feels bitter but he wants comfort from me. I met his family members. But I want to know why. His family liked me.

[@leowilson1791]

Hello friend 👋 how are you feeling today hope you're having a wonderful day over there.??

[@annetteaverilla4332]

Dating a widower: he has grown children and they have family gatherings yet he doesn’t take me and leaves me behind. I guess by taking me he may think his kids won’t talk to him it has been 2 years and still going through this he tells me he loves me but at times he says my wife this, that and I feel like I’m his lover.

[@ohdear2275]

How is this acceptable to YOU? It shouldn't be. This is bizarre, belittling behavior. Get on with your great life to be!

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@86muziklvr]

Thank you for this video. My husband and I will be married a year soon, but he still has his late wife things in the house where I’ve been living for 2 years now and has their anniversary in his phone as “wedding anniversary” with reminder. I told him I saw it and he doesn’t think it’s a big deal and said yeah it’s in there.. I’ve tried everything to make him understand I feel second when things like this come up, but he just goes into silent mode. I am now entering the regret phase and I hate it, because we are so good in any other way. Any advise? Do you have any videos I haven’t found yet?

[@DatingaWidower]

Marriage isn't going to solve this problem. If he can't make you feel like #1, it's time to break off the engagement and move out.

[@tinaforbes1059]

@ Me . He's not ready to move on . I would not entertain people like him, you should run a mile from him before he destroyed you .

[@RG-hf4et]

Why did you agree to marry & move in with him with the wife's things in the house?!!!!! That was mistake #1. That's on you. Mistake #2: You shouldn't have kept quiet about this at all. You were too easy. mistake #3: You married this guy. Why?!!!

[@anntastic1532]

Question...my dad suddenly passed away in October 2021 and my mom was courted and is now engaged to be married to this guy (6 months after my dad died, knowing this man only about 3 months long distance and having only met him in person for about a week)...really worried about her, but not sure how to talk to her.

[@elishevabarenbaum5319]

I may be wrong, but this situation sounds like it has the potential to be a scam. I would suggest: 1. make sure that your mother has a busy social calendar with friends and family, activities etc, living her life, not sitting at home feeling lonely 2. quietly do a background check on the man in question, 3.tell her that you're happy for her and gently persuade her to take her time and 4. speak to the family lawyer about asset protection etc.

[@sleepsmartsmashstress740]

Is the fact that his release date from the penitentiary for killing the wife more than a year away a good one to bear in mind ?

[@ashleyhartman-klein6896]

What if your dating a solider online (have never met yet, they are on tour) a widowed father who's wife passed away 4 years ago. It's only been two weeks, but he is super caring and very romantic says he sees a future with me and I do with him too. I'm just worried... After 1 week of talking everyday (he expects all my past and my flaws) he told me he loved me (in the most romantic way) shortly after asking me out and that he sees a forever future with me. I told him it isn't it a little soon to be saying those kind of things. I even ask him if he's sure about his feelings, that it's not (a void) because I make him feel good. He said he knows it's soon and will definitely reflect on it to make sure. Week two he says he doesn't care if it's too soon he is sure and even took the time to write his own love poem to me. I am divorced of 3 yrs now with a son and all my life have heavily guarded(haven't dated since divorce) my heart. He was completely unstood and is very patient with me. I feel exactly what he feels now and we both feel that we are each everything we've wanted in a forever parter and he's unstood me more than anyone in my life, in ways (I have never felt this kind of love before) I only hoped-for. Communication is key to both of us and we both feel God had put us together, but still it's only been two weeks. I don't know what to do my heart and gut tell me yes, but my brian keeps reminding me that it's been 2 weeks. He knows I'm insecure about myself even if I am a strong woman and tells me I'm beautiful tells me he wants me to tell my self too. I analyze everything and I don't know if I'm just making my anxious, because of how soon it is. He doesn't talk about his wife that past or his son and I know nothing about them. I do know he's an active solider as a like long career and I expect all those thing but am I missing signs, because I've never dated someone who was a solider, a widower, a father, and never met in person. I don't know anyone who's like that either, so I don't know who to talk to about it either. I don't know how to bring up his wife or son because I know you shouldn't talk about sad thing's while they are on tour, I know it's a sensitive subject in general, and I don't want to offend him by asking anything about it. What should I do? I still want to take things slow (I don't want either of us to get hurt) because I know it's still early. I know what I feel thought too. I haven't said the exact 3 words, (I want to) but I have definitely expressed that I feel the same. I am always up front and honest about thing's to him, especially my feelings that's who I am. I have TBI and C-PTSD from my childhood, which he knows and expects. I just don't want it to get in my way of being with him or if I could be missing something because of it too.

[@DatingaWidower]

When will you actually meet in person?

[@ashleyhartman-klein6896]

@@DatingaWidower I'm pretty sure when he gets back. He just told me yesterday that he talked to his son about him having brother. He said in time he'll ask him how he feels about having a new mom. He also mentioned calling the area where I live home and I didn't have to bring it up, so that's good right?

[@DatingaWidower]

@@ashleyhartman-klein6896 Meeting in person and spending a lot of time together is a good way to get a gut check on everything and see if he's everything you think it is. Proceed with your eyes wide open and let me know how it goes.

[@ashleyhartman-klein6896]

@@DatingaWidower Okay I will for sure do that. thank you I really appreciate it.

[@robloxgamer21_official]

Be careful, there are lots of scammers pretending to be soldier. They talk sweet and make you fall in love. If you ask them to videocall, they have many excuses, that’s when you know that they are scammer.

[@barbrathompson9798]

Background too distracting

[@PamelaConnects90210]

My widower "friend" took me to one of the islands where he has a vacation home and told me I had the same sensory taste as his deceased wife at the perfume shop.

[@DatingaWidower]

He probably should have kept his mouth shut.

[@johnkeith2450]

Am assuming you are no longer with him

[@latinaalma1947]

Look you dont want to be compared..we are all individuals and need to be loved for.our uniqueness never settle...you will regret it..I am a widow in a 40 ur relationship.

[@catblue7065]

64 yo widow 1yr..after 33 yrs of marriage. Miss male energy and laughter, but the thought of dating makes me want to gag at this point. Would love a few male friendships, tho.

[@favourtakpor8102]

am dating a widower and we just started at first he was crying at first but he takes me for whom I am, and don't know how to start now need advice

[@cherilcooper289]

I knew it.. My gut said don't do it.. And I didn't.. Ha Ha..

[@fh.4784]

Your gut said don't date a widower and you really didn't?

[@barbaralewis9816]

Are all these comments valid for those who have beeen married for 40 or more? At this stage, there’s no possibility of having children with the next love, nor of having the lifetime of memories that were shared with the deceased wide. So is it fair to expect the same level of “moving on” at this stage of life?

[@DatingaWidower]

Yes, it's fair.

[@mecca115able]

Hey abel.. my widower sent me a text.. saying my I'm used to certain kind of men. He asked me out to baseball game. Then said he could not afford the tickets. Then said we can go bowling. I sent him links to discount tickets. To the game. He suggested he would go to the box office. No problem. Then this morning I get a text saying I think I'm dating to early this would have been our 3rd date. I'm pissed off. I did not see red flags. What the hell happened. He's not answering my text. I never bought up relationship I feel like I'm not good enough.

[@suebrown7032]

Paula C as a widow i can honestly say that we feel really messed up. youre a good person timing was bad

[@maryroberts6921]

Move on. He has issues

[@gratefulforabundance9043]

Move on ! He is using you to pay for his lifestyle. No woman should be a guy’s purse, or nurse ! We learn this lesson and never fall for it again.

[@a.d.b535]

Abel, I dated a widower who did not I have shrines to his wife, but hinted that he wanted me to go with him to visit her grave site. I passed because I felt like that was a very personal part of his life. What do you make of that?

[@DatingaWidower]

You should never feel obligated to go. If you want to pass, then pass. Hopefully the widower is understanding.

[@maridevipam1554]

There wasn’t changed ... her pic is everywhere.. he prays to her .. I understand Hindus does that .. but right infront of his bed Inside his cupboard Behind his door He keeps his wallet infront of her pic ... it was a marriage of 24 years ... After 5 years she has gone I never felt once I’m his priority.. I accept his adults children as mine .. beside all this .. after years he still post her pic Their wedding pic .. as a family along with his children And me a single mom .. I don’t get any support from him .. I feel empty totally

[@HummingbirdEighty8]

I find it appalling that you started up again only a few months after your wife passed. Even worse is the fact that you hid it! You are the biggest red flag I've ever heard of.☠️

[@pattylevesque2601]

wow. you like to talk

[@cherilcooper289]

All those widowers are sick.. Run...

[@suebrown7032]

Cheril Cooper lucky for the world you wont be a widow

[@filipinafaulkner6955]

I have a great idea from your sharing.. I have someone mmm still not working together with me.. he have so much excuse..lol

[@panda594]

One red flag, dating 3 to 4 months after your spouse dies..even if they were sick for a while..don't listen to a damn thing this man says...he was waiting to date again..if you dated that soon, of course you were embarrassed to introduce your girlfriend..forced? No, you're a troll. You didn't honestly love your wife..I lost my husband in 2011..It took me at least 3 years to even consider dating..I was a fairly young Widow, 41, still attractive, still desirable, but I wasn't ready..Took almost 5 more years. Marathon 'girls? Is that sexual? You disrespect your late wife's memory.

[@maryroberts6921]

You'd have to read his story. One of his books is free to read online. "Marathon girl"?, is not sexual. Read his story

[@DaveLovejoy]

You can’t judge another’s experience based on yours. My wife of 42 years was seriously ill for her last four. I was her sole caregiver and we talked about EVERYTHING until her end, and grief and loss were encountered long before her death. My current emotional health is BECAUSE of our love and caring for each other, not a sign that there was no love. She readied me, removed any guilt or shame to love again.

[@christineplaton3048]

Lol. He's wearing her earring in his ear.

[@fireingpin74]

Red flag term is awful in this video

[@suebrown7032]

🦋😉🤠

[@mecca115able]

Abel that's why I dont like dating divorced or widowers.. too flaky

[@MsCliffmaddox]

Widowers need loven too, good luck to you.

[@amandaforrester7636]

I've dated and broken up with so many men who were flakey for way dumber reasons. At least I understand why.

[@johnkeith2450]

@@MsCliffmaddox Easily 75% of widowers/widows are never going to be healthy enough to be with someone else

[@annconforti9294]

Amen. The one I dated would make dates then break them.

[@richardbradshaw7830]

i came across your touching comment in the death of love ones post here on you tube. Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday.....

[@karenbusser6073]

This is terrible

[@anthonyanderson2189]

Yes Karen, hello how are you doing?... You look so beautiful and attractive and also have a lovely smile

[@brittanymarrison8949]

My boyfriend told me that when he passes he is going to join and be with his late wife. I’ve been living with him 5 months.

[@DatingaWidower]

Ouch!

[@maryroberts6921]

Good for him. If that is your boundary- then leave him

[@brittanymarrison8949]

@@maryroberts6921 I’ve been with him almost 2 years and living with him a little over a year and a half now I don’t know if he still feels that way. I just want to know if there’s room for me he’s put me through a lot emotionally but you’re right that is my boundary. I should start thinking about my future instead about worrying about hurting him, I deserve a man that is going to love me and want to be with me forever and not just be a placeholder until he can join his late wife

[@RG-hf4et]

How about an update, please?

[@okfrostman]

How did I know it's the guy that's wrong . Go figure.

[@DatingaWidower]

Actions speak louder than words. Watch what he does, not what he says.

[@grantsmith6052]

Women stay away from this guy.

[@cherilcooper289]

LMAO...

[@abbiethorndike121]

Got stuck on how many "ummms" you put in your dialogue.