Starting Over at 40: What I've Learned Along the Way | Advice for Black Women Starting Over

[@denacollins352]

I finally left my husband when I realized that living with him was killing me. Physically, spiritual and emotional well-being returned and grew slowly.

[@AdaliaAborisade]

I know that kind of realization all too well. Good on you for doing what needed to be done.

[@Nacole_Lashoun]

❤ Unfortunately, I’ve been there. Congratulations on choosing yourself.

[@onthelo]

Social media is helping to amplify that it's 'not just you' in these scenarios. Growing up, marriage has always been glorified. Continuing to stay with someone who is [barely] giving you morsels of attention is glorified (i.e. 'He's a good man Savannah' / Waiting to Exhale, soo many classic R&B songs, ie Mokenstef 'He's Mine', I digress lol). In earlier times the community really tried to have us thinking as a woman you would be crazy to leave if you've already invested XYZ time into a relationship. I commend women for sharing their stories and being courageous enough to even question status quo even if when the immediate next step is unknown/ambiguous.

[@evelyngolden2272]

WOW! Good for you! I was 38 when I decided after 15 years to end my marriage. Amazing, I got the same reaction from others about our divorce. I have not only survived, but thrived for the 35 years since my divorce. Living my best life in Panama City, Panama.

[@AdaliaAborisade]

🙌🏾

[@Jess-A]

Adalia, In your 50’s you will care so much less about what folks think anymore. It’s the start of freedom.

[@vienicestyles]

There’s nothing wrong with starting over. Failure comes with success. Nothing beats a failure except a try. The worst thing in life is Regret. BW live your life to the fullest and do what’s best for you because ain’t nobody getting out of here alive. Signed, Live Your Dreams. 🥹 💖 ♊️ 👩🏽 💫 🌍 👽 🛸 🪬 🧿

[@sfedrickbridges]

When I divorced my husband, my mom said you women are different from my generation. We would've stayed. I said I am not giving my whole to anyone and be miserable, I'm out. The lightbulb came on for my mom, plus she was packing when we went to court!

[@AdaliaAborisade]

🙌🏾

[@sandrasgotvoice]

This was timely and a wonderful reflection. And you came through it all still looking like you're in your twenties.🤣

[@AdaliaAborisade]

🤣

[@jennifereaddy]

"Making a New Decision Based off New Information " ❤

[@vienicestyles]

I have saved so much money by switching to the truth. I no longer celebrate European holy’days because I’m not European. So, I don’t get depressed or FOMO during these events.

[@itsquinisha]

5-year anniversary of my divorce is in January 🙌🏾 Solidarity to all the ladies going through and/or made it to the other side 💜

[@AdaliaAborisade]

@@itsquinisha 🙌🏾

[@Reecie1985]

My divorce was just finalized in October after 14 years. I just turned 39 and I stayed for years out of fear. Lord knows you are speaking on so many feelings I went through over the course of my separation. Thanks for sharing ❤

[@AdaliaAborisade]

You're most welcome

[@asiablackgrl6482]

Hey Adalia! I always love hearing about your story. I’m an almost 35 year old woman. Teacher by profession. No kids or partner. 2025 is going to be my year of maximizing my freedom! I’m ready to transition into another career field. Travel more. Explore being in other countries! Thank you so much for your advice and vulnerability!

[@cjm6326]

❤Right on time

[@kellipoole1219]

Thanks for reminding me that we get to make a different choice! ❤

[@monicam-x8n]

Amen!

[@jennifereaddy]

Thanks for sharing.

[@AdaliaAborisade]

Thanks for watching!

[@Jess-A]

Good for you Sister. I was having this same conversation with my sister tonight. Today is my nephews birthday 🥳

[@feliznoire]

@ Minute 24, ai literally just prayed this today, 12.20.24!!!!! Jesus, I hate that me 10yrs through July 2023 had to go through what she went through. But I am building a new life now Jesus that is better than all of yesterday! In addition, I am looking forward to remarrying the right, aligned man.

[@mechiawilson164]

Thank you for this vlog. You really spoke to me and my situation as a 45 year old in the midst of a divorce and career change. I can now see the light at the end and becoming more intentional on creating the life I deserve to live.

[@rajaal-taqi8122]

This broadcast has been really big for you... I can hear the quiver in your voice, your story is so reminiscenct of my own younger life. What I know now is life be life'n & flexibility is key to living and loving not just yourself but "Life" and what it brings YOU. Try it top to bottom...right now I'm scared but willing to tell the truth and shame the devil!!!

[@kimberlygila]

Hola adalia y Buena conversacion 😊

[@Elaine_713]

Thank you for this❤

[@AdaliaAborisade]

You're welcome

[@kmartin8365]

Thank you for your honesty. The other side is much better. I'm remarried and it's much better because I chose different this time.

[@alwaysinpursuit]

Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your truth and advice.

[@doniquezairen5207]

😂 this shirt is killing me, I never was married, almost but not yet 😅, we shall see what happens later on

[@cececooks1526]

Thank you Adalia, I needed this so much! Thank you again!!!

[@AdaliaAborisade]

You're most welcome!

[@ingridthompson6512]

💛🌺The message I needed to hear right now

[@AdaliaAborisade]

So glad it resonated with you

[@rosearthur2332]

I agree

[@blackbusinessreviewwithjoe9078]

😅😅 love your shirt

[@dianeheidelberg3791]

Adalia I have been there and understand how you feel! Look us now:)

[@andreanalife]

I'm sorry I'm stuck on 50 March lol like 50 where?!

[@AdaliaAborisade]

🤣