Adulting (and other dreams we were sold)

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Yeah, adulting is a scam but here we are so let’s get rid of the unrealistic expectations and just enjoy the ride!
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[@AdellaAfadi]

Adulting is hard, but please remember to rest: kzbin.info/www/bejne/pGW0Z3tvnL9_oKc (New video)

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

the fact that i buy food and it doesnt just cook itself after 2 weeks in the fridge is so rude, like read the room 🙄 EDIT: thanks for 1k 🥰 i feel like i have viral tweet lmao i make videos too if you wanna check that out 🥺 👉🏾👈🏾

[@esmesal6006]

😭😹 mann thanks for the laugh

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

@@esmesal6006 ill be here all week (waiting for my hello fresh box probably 💀)

[@wanjanjama]

as in??

[@adxd1002]

hahahahaahaha

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

@@wanjanjama as in i need the pre sliced onions pre sautéed too 💀 or its just pre-recycled at this point

[@rachelb6796]

I'm 31 and yeah lower the bar and let the confidence grow at its own rate. Everyone is pretending anyway.

[@AdellaAfadi]

Really we’re all pretending for real 😩

[@alshallon]

32 over here. lol i concur

[@Heykay34]

Agreed

[@pynklady11]

32 and agreed. The best thing I've ever learned was to release the pressure. Everyone is drowning and pretending YOLO.

[@mightyintellectual8062]

Don’t lower your bar! Just be flexible and kind to yourself. Find joy in the present moments. ❤️

[@tj8816]

At 29, I graduated college, got my dream job. I was happily married, renovating my beautiful home, livng the DINK life with my husband and dog. We had a six figure combined income and back to back vacations planned this year. It was awesome. Now at 30, he left me 2 months ago, my dog died suddenly last year, I got bought out my home, moved back in with my mom and had our vacations refunded. I've lost everything except my job. I'm leaving with half the equity in my home and nothing else. 30 is wild, but I'm riding it out. Don't play ya selves 😂😂

[@Heykay34]

Hang in there, time heals.

[@kikijo92]

Wow!

[@babygee.02.01]

It will get better hun, start dreaming and living again. 🌻😘😍

[@tj8816]

Thanks everyone. My point is that sometimes, 30 is a reset button. It's ok for everything to not be together, because even if it is, it can fall apart rapidly !

[@babygee.02.01]

@@tj8816 agreed, nothing is set in stone

[@heyjavonnejay]

I just turned 29, and part of me feels like the "clock is ticking" to have things figured out. Pshh! For who?! The idea that we must be married, homeowners, with 2.5 kids, a white picket fence and a dog by 30, is antiquated! It's 2021! Society has changed, the economy *damn* sure has changed, inflation is real, etc. So why don't we as a collective say "to hell with it" and start living by our own standards? WHO'S WITH ME?!

[@nokwandatwala7600]

Me!!! I am with you!

[@ememdee5053]

Well said! It's such an outdated expectation that we should have life figured out by 30 when times are rapidly changing. Live life by your own standards!

[@joyo1318]

2.5 kids!!! Am rolling!!🤣🤣🤣

[@fitlegend9733]

“The clock is ticking” refers to your biological time clock. A lot of you get lost in this whole the world is changing and technology blah blah. Their is still something called biological nature. Once a woman hits 30 chances of pregnancy starts dropping. At 35 your chances drops significantly. If a woman wants kids she has to have most things together early. That’s just how we are created. If she doesn’t then she can do whatever she wants but let’s be honest most woman want kids.

[@alexforce9]

After a woman hit 30 her dating options drop. Every year above 30 - less and less men want to date you. (Just note - date - not have sex with, there are always men who would want to do that). Specialy high quality men. Men preffer younger women. Im not saying it to be mean - thats just the reality of the dating market.

[@xHaniffax]

I'm 28. When I was 20 I thought I would be married with 2 kids by now. Let's all laugh together.

[@patriciamerced1611]

Enjoy every stage!!!!

[@Channyb89]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@LETUSEATCAKE]

Lmao!! I actually lol’d at this comment but same girl same 🥲

[@fae_mj]

😂😂😂

[@ddoubleu170]

Me fucking too, sis! That shit is comedy now!

[@stafi7066]

I’m 24 going into 25 and i haven’t even started my life yet. Bruh i still live with my parents and is unemployed due to covid. The feeling that i’ve let my parents down is just the worst. I’m thankful that my parents are the best and supportive.

[@kikox8902]

Me too, errybody living with their parents these days tho. No shame, our generation was kinda screwed. I am thankful for my mom support, but ready to get TF asap after this shi#$ *blac chyna mom voice*

[@elky360]

I got my first proper job last year at 24, during lockdown. There is hope! My life changed in an instant I went from living at home, to working for a company that pays for my accommodation and a company car. Don’t give up!

[@caribanna1865]

Omg I feel this on a spiritual level 😭 I’m going into my last year of uni and the job hunting I haven’t even started is literally all I think about. My friends who have already left uni with first class honours are still job hunting in this covid economy. I don’t wanna let my parents down after 4 years of them financing me. And I thank God everyday that they understand what I’m going through. You’re not alone 💕

[@goldn909]

It’s okay it’ll turn around

[@07ikkin]

Your life has started. You just might not be where society says you should be but society is not what is important. Try a work from home job. You'll get where you wanna be eventually

[@yasmeenalim1]

Don’t have kids if you can’t quit your job to spend time with them. I feel like I am perpetually abandoning my daughter to work 40 hrs at something I hate. Most moms won’t admit this.

[@tonie48]

Life is a scam, like I want to be able to pay all my bills, travel when I want , and not have to work 40+ hours a week to do it, also I don't want to retire at 65, life is hard man

[@07ikkin]

That's where I'm at. I don't even have the idea of a dream job anymore. Like you said, I'm not tryna work til 65. Especially when life expectancy is like 76. I start a new job soon so hopefully I like it and can stick with it til I figure out what I can invent lol

[@tonie48]

@@07ikkin agreed, like I know what I want to do, but since I've decided to not work 40 hours, it's been hard finding new work to support me till I get the proper certification

[@acwright28]

@@07ikkin haha I think about what I can invent everyday to not work lol that’s real

[@siyankosi3661]

Kubi

[@ye23.]

Thats capitalism love lol

[@Byenia]

Am nearing 40 and have finally figured out that adulting is nonsensical in this day and age. It's just a trap that grows more expensive with each passing year. lol

[@lalapoo7110]

Right!?! I want to cancel this subscription, gimme playground days any day 😩

[@AdellaAfadi]

So expensive whyyy

[@leann1234]

Not gonna lie... At first I read "with each pissing year" 😂

[@Byenia]

@@AdellaAfadi Rent goes up. Utility costs go up. Gas prices go up. House prices go up. Car prices go up. Student loan interest rates and educational expenses go up. Etc.

[@NallahBrown]

NONSENSICAL!!!! Say that!

[@marilynmonheaux]

When I turned 30, I learned that everything I had been taught about life is wrong. 1) Student Loans for College 2) Fancy Engagement Ring 3) Big Wedding 4) Mortgage 5) Loyalty to one company 6) Credit cards Run Away From All! All terrible!

[@scarlet8078]

100% correct! Literally everything that we've been told is either wrong or just detrimental in today's world. In fairness, student loans didn't used to be bad since college used to cost much less. Good jobs were virtually guaranteed. Anyone could work in the manufacturing or services industries and make a living wage. Work weeks were 30 - 40 hours. Companies were loyal to the employees. Now, 30% of workers are not contractors/ consultants/ not full time.

[@michaeloluokun9488]

Mortgage?

[@marilynmonheaux]

@@michaeloluokun9488 Yes. In the book “The Millionaire Next Door” by Thomas Stanley, PhD, a study of 10k millionaires, it says that one thing they have in common is they own their homes outright. No mortgage and obviously that means when you make money you can save and invest it. Obviously this isn’t feasible for everyone but for many in the developed world it’s a matter of priorities.

[@meregaming1770]

@@marilynmonheaux That isn't feasible for ANYONE who isn't a millionaire already.

[@marilynmonheaux]

@@meregaming1770 I’m not a millionaire. I bought a house in an auction and fixed it up. It’s possible if you really want it.

[@brittneyedwards8127]

30 is when the breakdown happens, then you build your true self up from there

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

so you tellin me it finna get WORSE after 30?? i need to speak to a manager

[@kikox8902]

@@COLORMIND.mp4 facts, cause at 23 i dont even know what i dont know

[@brittneyedwards8127]

@@COLORMIND.mp4 You'll be on the road to recovery about 32 ish and should be living your beat life around 35. Trust the process LOL

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

@@brittneyedwards8127 ok….sounds fake…but ok :)

[@AdellaAfadi]

Not a breakdown 😩😅 I’ve already had a couple of those Brittney!!

[@MsSadiyaA]

I'm 42 this month and just realised that the 40s is where it's at. I spend my days doing what I want and not worrying about my future and what people think. I'm actually taking care of myself and my health. I have hobbies now, lol. My 30s were spent worrying about nonsense and not actually living my life. My 20s were spent looking towards my 30s thinking everything will be perfect once I get there.

[@tito4820]

im 18 and so glad i read this, ive spent most of my teens fantasizing about my 20s and 30s instead of just being a kid in the moment. needed to hear this, im happy ur living your best life queen

[@tip3015]

💯💯

[@Shay416]

Thank you for sharing this 💕

[@belen1036]

I so relate to this comment. I will be 40 next year and this comment makes me feel better.

[@lillianp8900]

@@tito4820 yes don't think it just live it. go out and do stuff try new things spend time with family and take pictures. i would give anything to start over , don't waste your youth like i did :(

[@eShawnny]

As soon as you said, "Today, I'm talking about adulting. ITS A SCAM" - I immediately liked the video.

[@KAIZORIANEMPIRE]

not really you just don't know how to live life lol, i have a great life

[@eShawnny]

@@KAIZORIANEMPIRE why are people constantly spreading negativity on this platform? How is it YOUR business how we live our lives? How is that something you feel confident enough to just say like you know anybody on here? Then add “lol” - it ain’t cute love.

[@eShawnny]

@@KAIZORIANEMPIRE you doing too much love.

[@KAIZORIANEMPIRE]

@@eShawnny i am doing too much? whatdoes that even mean?

[@Heykay34]

Yea the person above is a troll. All negative comments. If They enjoyed their life they wouldn’t have so much to say about others.

[@nadiarambles]

Moral of the story: any “standard” really doesn’t matter, just be open to learning as you go and enjoy the journey :) (except taxes. I don’t enjoy those.)

[@AdellaAfadi]

Not taxes 😩

[@nadiarambles]

@@AdellaAfadi Right?? I wanna dive straight back into the freedom of childhood every time tax season approaches. :(

[@ojames1983]

Believe living a life of “anarchy” / without standards / goals to hit or reach if you want to and see how far that gets you. 💀💀😂😂

[@nadiarambles]

@@ojames1983 Anarchy? When did the video or my comment mention rejecting all authority or not having any goals? We're talking about disregarding the unattainable standard of 'having everything figured out by 30'.

[@phoenixreviews2836]

@@ojames1983 lmao when did anarchism come into this lmao?

[@liyahmeridy7997]

Having it all figured out by 30 used to be what I wanted too. But now I'm coming to terms with the truth - I will not have anything figured out ever. We keep growing and changing and times are changing too, and that's the only thing I can try to prepare for. The only thing I feel like I've figured out is that Capitalism is a B A S T A R D.

[@jewelsjewels3655]

Capitalism and Feminism it's all a scam

[@jacobjacob4139]

Sounds like you've figured out that you can't figure anything out, that should be enough! Capitalism is the closest thing to freedom, you get to choose to be either a consumer or a producer and live with the consequences of your choice.

[@jacobjacob4139]

Sounds like you've figured out that you can't figure anything out, that should be enough! Capitalism is the closest thing to freedom, you get to choose to be either a consumer or a producer and live with the consequences of your choice.

[@liyahmeridy7997]

@@jacobjacob4139 yeahhhh I don't know if I agree with that personally. Probably more so with smaller businesses, but with massive corporations not so much. I don't desire to own a business now, but if that's what I need to do to be "free" then it's not really freedom, just the illusion of freedom. My issue with capitalism is that it is incredibly invasive in nearly all aspects of life that really shouldn't be focused on profit, and wreaking horrible consequences that are far reaching and possibly irreversible (or passed on to consumers to pay for).

[@jacobjacob4139]

@@liyahmeridy7997 Yeh I agree that capitalism too has a number of negatives, but what's the viable alternative in the 21st century? They say you are what you eat, the kind of food you eat shape up your physical body and the type of content you consume from media & society shape up your thoughts, perception & outlook on life. Maybe you're free but someone keeps telling you that you're not free while in actual fact they want you to keep consuming with a hope to be free in the future.

[@misskemo]

Almost 31 now and I wish I didn’t put so pressure on my self in my 20s. Things will fall in place at the right time, plan what you can but enjoy the moments. If you want to travel do it, if you have a goal plan towards it and never compare yourself with others.

[@ye23.]

Never compare yourself to others is a major key

[@meregaming1770]

You're contradicting yourself.

[@honeyhomemakers]

It’s really a trap! I’m shocked every time a bill comes and has my name on it🥴

[@Sandra.-.]

Girl! The ghetto😅

[@AdellaAfadi]

Yeah for real like how dare you ask me for money 😩😩

[@goldn909]

😂😂 I always wish I skipped college and just left the country to travel or something.. instead of having student loans

[@Mindful.Movement.01]

@@goldn909 same . I so agree

[@acwright28]

@@goldn909 same

[@LydiaDinga]

I’m actually cracking up. You hit the nail on the head it’s SCRARRYYYY

[@edithkeswa3915]

Yassss.Our girl Lydia follows Adella.My fav KZbinrs.Love from South Africa🇿🇦

[@AdellaAfadi]

😂😂 Thanks sis!

[@Tumisho-kgwete]

@@edithkeswa3915 I also be watching from South Africa 🇿🇦 ❤️yeah and I love them both so much too!!❤️👏🏽

[@tessynn2906]

I'll be 27 later in the year and I'm tired. They lied cuz I'm still stuck at 13 lol

[@HesterDW]

Same I feel like my 29 year old self is on autopilot. It keeps doing adult things to make sure I don't end up homeless. But my actual self is like 16. When tf does my actual self catch up?!

[@diaryofshae]

@@HesterDW I’m 28 and I still feel 23/24 my younger sisters are like yeah we forget you’re almost 30 . I’m like girls it’s a scam .

[@sungaze342]

@@HesterDW honestly I feel like I’m 22 but yet 29 and don’t even look 29 lol but 22 lol

[@sungaze342]

@@diaryofshae girl a big ol’ scam🙄

[@SignedwithanA]

Lmaoo I’m definitely somewhere in childhood phase…moving like an adult but I come home and watch nothin but cartoons to soothe me lmaoo

[@Oyinscorner]

Ngl when she started talking about saving money and cooking, I could smell the hello fresh ad coming. The segue was smooth though

[@sapphiremontrelle8091]

Yes it was!🤣

[@AdellaAfadi]

Hehe 😁

[@07ikkin]

Yes, I'm ok with how she did it. I hate when KZbinrs spend the first 5 minutes talking about their sponsor.. Like show me what I came for first

[@TheWellnessAbbey]

I'm also removing the pressure on myself to 'become successful' as that bar is usually defined and set by people other than myself (I.e. society) and leaves us constantly chasing after something we can never truly attain as the bar is constantly moved. I'm learning to just feel content with my 'normal' salary and less than 7 additional streams of income😉

[@Dumbbellsandcoffee]

Less than 7 additional streams of income 😩🙌🏾

[@Shay416]

🙏🏾 #noLLC 😂

[@tessy28]

It's the last part for me.🤣🤣

[@katythebeauty330]

It’s the less than 7 stream of income for me ‼️

[@juliem5162]

I can not relate to the sad life of adulting. At such a young age, my siblings and I had responsibilities and knew what out parents finances looked like. We were translator for my mom and the other immigrants in our communities as well. We had to grow up really fast in a dark and heartless world. As result, my adulting is amazing!!! My hardship prepared for the realities of life and financially, learned from other mistake. So when I entered the work force, I was careful with my money. Hustled into college debt free (long story) .

[@suchastrangegirl36]

oh good for you!!!!

[@juliem5162]

@Its Me you are not Lousy. Some of us have and had it worst than others, but we are not victims. My rules for myself is never make excuses. To loose weight, you don't need to hit the gym. There are alot of youtube channels that have weekly, monthly fitness challenges to exercise at home. Eat less process and more whole foods (fruit, vegies, grains, legumes, meat, etc) don't have to confine yourself to just salad every day. Just less process and take out. Notice I side less, no need to eliminate completely. If you want cake eat it however to loose wieght, you will have to make small sacrifices in the beginning. What is the requirement to graduate high school? Do that. When I was in school, I had a study schedule at home. Dedicating 30min to 1 hour to study on a subject I wasn't strong at for 5 days a week. Always be kind and respectful to others. Kindness has helped me throughout my life. People are more willing to help you and guide you to the next step. Also, remember no one cares about your problem. Therefore, never allow your issue to hold you back. Complaining and playing victim does us not good. Write down your goals in a book. Starting hitting them by taking baby steps. Do not let your past and present determine your future. Only you can change it. Starting NOW.

[@ugommaokorie1660]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@suoutubez19]

@@juliem5162 great perspective! playing the victim holds you back SO much.

[@michaelmachupa3854]

I can relate. My parents weren't immigrants but they were very neglectful. So we had to do a lot of things on our own at an early age. At 16 I was working, selling stuff on Ebay, buying my own cars, paying my own insurance, phone bill etc. I basically had to teach myself everything.

[@19inkorrect91]

Adulthood starts when you're on your own. Its amazing how having parents take care of you keeps you in an extended childhood no matter what age you are. The minute you go on your own and become responsible is when adulthood begins.

[@07ikkin]

I respectfully disagree. I have worked since 16 and have NEVER had to ask my parents for money past the age of 20 ( 1x for car insurance help). I stayed living at home all throughout college, still working and paying bills at my parents house. Graduated, continued saving money, then moved out. I've had zero problems and am happy with my decision. I prepared well 🙂

[@lbw6081]

@@07ikkin thank you for this post !

[@MaffyTaffyHaffy]

@@07ikkin what bills do you have to pay if your parents are paying for the roof over your head? Dumbo lol

[@abnormpsych17]

@Maffy Taffy lots of people live with their parents and pay rent, a water bill, laundry soap and food for the house among other things. Fuck you mean. Living with parents as an adult can just like living with roommates.

[@johnwalker1058]

@@MaffyTaffyHaffy They might contribute to utilities like gas, water, or electric or something. It's not always all or nothing. I've heard of people living with their parents who don't pay rent, but help pay some bills or groceries, and others who don't contribute towards bills, but they pay their parents rent to keep being able to live in their childhood room. Again, it's not always all or nothing of being completely dependent or completely independent.

[@felicia_rm]

We all need to relax. I've started to push back actually. I'm tired of "working hard" Edit: Make sure you stay away from debt, that's how the system "adults" you. In order to live life like a kid, have no debt, save and enjoy your money whenever you want. Thank me later

[@nadiarambles]

Totally agree about 'working hard' (unnecessarily)! I was raised in environments that glorified hustle culture and working yourself to the point of burnout. I'm trying now to 'work smarter' in my job and creative work, so I have more downtime to enjoy this one life I have. The best part of childhood was the free time to enjoy the simple things, after all. :))

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

wow that hit; truly the adult pipeline starts with debt because its an obligation that follows you around everywhere. children are children because they dont have to worry about as many obligations/responsibilities/bills

[@Shay416]

@@COLORMIND.mp4 And they can't legally sign documents, so no credit cards

[@AdrianA-yo8jd]

Don’t forget to save properly for retirement!

[@nicole__o]

Can I just say that blonde looks absolutely impeccable on you

[@AdellaAfadi]

Thank you 😊

[@nicole__o]

“Are my friends going to be online on MSN when I get home?” 😂

[@AdellaAfadi]

This was the question 😂😂

[@winniejean2442]

The memories! My childhood literally flashed before my eyes 😆

[@ye23.]

Facts 😂 my concern was want font I was gonna use for my msn screen name

[@_KrystalAlexis]

Cost of living is too high: and wages haven’t increased that is the true issue why people are not where they are at in their 30’s. You go to college and your job doesn’t pay enough to cover student loans

[@Ilikefrogs..]

Honestly, I hired a cleaning lady. I can barely afford it, but I don't have to lie awake at night worrying about someone taking my kid away because my house is always a mess. Totally worth the money, highly recommend it. The rest of my family would definitely shame me if they knew and I couldn't care less.

[@tessy28]

Good for you. You have to do things that make your life easier. Life is already stressful enough.

[@drmarsupial8536]

Past salaries covered a lot more. Young adults are expected to make ends meet with so much less from employers today. Can’t really compare to previous generations.

[@SS-cu8se]

Currently 29, turning 30 next year, married and expecting my first child in August (God willing). I am learning to just go with the flow. I don’t feel 30, I don’t feel like I look 30 (as in, I don’t feel like I look like a “grown up” whatever that means lol) and I feel like time has passed but I’m still me. One thing though, is I feel like as the older you get, you gain more clarity and understanding of the life you want to live. And bills and responsibility put life into perspective for you. When you realize that the life you want to live takes money; that the mindset and peace you want to have takes effort (ie. protecting what you consume); that the relationships/friendships you want might require you to distance yourself from those who are the opposite of that; that’s when you really wake up from autopilot and start to be more mindful/conscious of everything. And it’s usually through time and experience that you gain that newfound clarity. This clarity is the only thing that has made me feel like I’m “adulting.”

[@healthyfitfun]

Just turned 30 and this is so spot on!!! I absolutely feel the same as I always have, just with more life lessons & clarity. Congrats on your pregnancy !

[@PrincessWhatsername]

I turn 30 in October this year and I have to agree that clarity is the biggest difference. Only, in my case I'm clear in knowing that what I want to do isn't what I thought I would want to do, and now I'm struggling with trying to figure out how to shift gears...therefore still ain't got my ish together 😂😭

[@goldn909]

Lol you’re reading the story of my life!

[@07ikkin]

29, married and expecting first child puts you "right on track" by societies standards. Looks like you got it all figured out. As for the rest of us ..lol

[@SS-cu8se]

@@07ikkin lol it looks like that unless things go left, which can happen at anytime. Society’s standards only work when life goes as planned, and we all know life rarely goes as planned lol. So it’s best just to discard society’s standard all together and live life at our own pace, accepting that things can change for the better or worse at any moment, so we should just appreciate life one day at a time.

[@lalapoo7110]

30 basically showed me up and laughed in my face serving me a huge portion of humble pie! I look back at my 21 self with pity coz I thought I’d have all together.. “no baby girl” I’m humbled 😩😂 On a serious note. We need to stop putting pressure on ourselves and others by setting unattainable standards. Seek to be happy in yourself and forget the Jones’s.. they inherited their wealth 😂

[@vaunmalone3064]

Yes, you know you're an adult when you worry about dust on the skirting boards, yes, it's a thing, they are not self cleaning! Oh responsibilities! 🙄

[@AdellaAfadi]

Nooo because I think about this daily. The skirting boards and the stairs 😩😂

[@jaicbacote3494]

Adulting is so ghetto and a trap 😒 and I knew this since I was 10 😂 ...Which is why I was not surprised when life came at me like Debo from Friday 😂🤣

[@jacobjacob4139]

You're so right about thinking you'll become free as an adult. I worked so hard to be free as an adult & I'm kinda free of almost all adult responsibilities, but the funny thing is all my "friends" aren't free, so my freedom is boring coz I spend it alone & rarely with other people because they have so much responsibilities & obligations. Life is a scam!

[@nrinka]

lol I am 30 this year and still figuring out life. That's the thing about life is that you are still figuring out life, and if you aren't figuring it out or trying new things or learning, you might as well just be dead. I am trying to embrace each day to be honest and live a simple, honest, life.

[@healthyfitfun]

Me too girl !

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

thank you for this :)

[@missunique5227]

I’m 16 and I’ve been feeling the pressure to get a job ever since I was 14 and stressing about my future since I was 13. It wasn’t until recently that I realized that I should enjoy my childhood for as long as I can because I have the rest of my life to be an adult. I’ll enjoy my privileged childhood life for as long as I can

[@goldn909]

I don’t think there is a timeframe for “getting it together” in life. Some people go thru high highs and low lows at different times. Those people you saw marrying in their 20s could be divorced by 30s or 40s. When you coincidentally are getting your life together or getting married. I believe in just living my life. God has been able to teach me things about how I messed up and how I can do better by taking it slow. It does get hard if you compare yourself to others success but don’t fall into that. We are all flowers that bloom at different times.

[@planetChristie]

The first thing we need to get rid of is 40 hr work week. It is not a res’ work life balance. Productivity should be the highest priority. I usually spend 1-2 hours everyday not productive at work with nothing to do. That time could be spent else where. We need to keep the hybrid working style too hàlf in office and half remote. We need to tear down the traditional school system. Our youth should be spent discovering our purpose and skills that align with who we are. This will help with wasting our young adult life trying to figure out what we want to do for a living. ‘Learning life skills in high school too!! I forgot to mention I’ll be 30 in a few months and decided to end a relationship and move back in with my parents cause adulting is truly ghetto 🤣. But I feel relieved for the fresh start to make things happen and truly confident in the new journey!

[@aprilflowers7015]

I actually feel lowkey resentment for my parents because they saw how hard life was. They struggled to pay bills. Saw how tedious and monotonous existence was. Saw that most of life is spent working, sleeping, paying bills, showering, exercising (in vain attempts to slow down getting all these inevitable diseases that are coming for us anyways), stressing, being frustrated, heartbroken, lonely, depressed, trying to figure life out, and very, very few moments actually enjoying oneself. And did they say, let's spare another human being from experiencing this? From going through this? No. They said fuck it. Let's selfishly have kids anyway no matter if they want to go through all this or not. They *still* decided to bring kids into this nightmarish existence to go through all this all over again. For what?? Make it make sense. smh. This is part of why I will never have kids. Who says they even want to be here? Even if you give them a good upbringing. Kids are just future suffering adults who will go through so much shit & work jobs they don't really want to just so society doesn't all them lazy and just so they can have food to eat and a roof over their heads. & if they later resent you for forcing them to have to deal with all the b.s. that bringing someone into existence requires, then be prepared to deal with that. Ok, rant over.

[@ishpagal9]

😁😁😁

[@ye23.]

I dont want to have kids and ppl swear thats a selfish decision when in actual fact I have always argued that ppl who have kids are the selfish ones lol. This proves my point😂

[@katejohnson5083]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@rses916]

Period 👏👏👏💅💅💅

[@Spiritualchar1111]

38, Married with 3 kids, house, good job and I still don't have anything figured out. I'm just wingin it to be honest. I tell my 12 yr old enjoy this time in your life cause when Adulting starts it's a different World 🌎 I've Learned That I will Never Have it figured out and that is Perfectly fine🙂

[@evapolitakis536]

the thing with time seeming to go faster is that it's about how much of your life consists of that time. if you're one year old, a year is gonna feel like a lifetime because, to you, it is. when you're 20, a year is 1/20 of your life, so it feels like it goes by quicker

[@AdellaAfadi]

Oh snap this makes so much sense!!

[@lillianp8900]

It goes faster the older you get or it feels that way. They even did a study on this and came up with a conclusion as to why. When you are a kid/teen everything is new and you are constantly having new experiences, things you will always remember. As you get older you don't really have as many first and so you may go a whole year doing anything new. So that year when you look back on it there are no new big memories and it's like a blur. Say you just worked and went home not doing much else, it's not something you are going to think back on. I remember summers as a kid seemed to go on forever, just like waiting for Christmas, now it seems like it's over in a blink

[@thembimogala9704]

The day we realize we are figuring out the ins and outs about life, it will be the day we stop pressuring ourselves with age-related goals. Nothing wrong with setting goals however be cognizant of the fact that life doesn't work out as you wish at that point. Let's learn to be easy on ourselves and enjoy living without pressure.

[@ayoadeyo]

Laundry is so longggggg omg 😭 get the clothes, sort them, put them into the washing machine, washing powder and fabric conditioner, waiting for the cycle, spreading the clothes, waiting to dry, it’s not dry yet, waiting some more, sometimes ironing, folding, putting away... AH AH I’m tired. Adulting is a scam indeed 🥲 This is a safe space right 🥺

[@kikox8902]

*glances at the dirty clothes overflowing from the laundry basket* 😒🙄

[@TheAlexis123987]

When I child, I didn’t think I was the one who would have to take care of all of thirst things. I feel like I need to go to the lab I make self cleaning clothes, surface, smart coolers that can make my meals. Every day you need to feed yourself !! That’s a lot of responsibility for one person to handle

[@lovemusic8387]

Been a subbie since the early "Cornflakes No Sugar" days. You are truly growing as a content creator. You're getting better and better at this by the video. Well done sis!

[@AdellaAfadi]

Ohhh 🥺🥺 I love finding an OG subscriber in my comments! Honestly thank you soo much for being here since the beginning and for this kind comment it means so much 😭🤎

[@sarzlaw10]

@@AdellaAfadi Yes we out here!

[@sonderexpeditions]

I feel like I got everything in order except relationships and dating. That's like foreign territory to me. I'm Scurred. Sigh.

[@AdellaAfadi]

🥴🥴🤎

[@AdellaAfadi]

At least you got everything else in order. That’s more than most of us 🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@tessy28]

Same. My financial life is the best it's ever been. My dating life is in the actual gutter!🤦🏽‍♀️🙁😩

[@Minaaamii]

I thought 20’s was SUCH an “adult” when I was kid… here I am at 23 going onto 24 laughing at that lol but it’s also reassuring to also realize that everyone’s actually just stumbling around trying to figure ourselves out

[@TheSteadyShow]

Take heart. I am 45 and adulting is still not working. Rigged! 😫

[@yafavegirljas]

Being in my early 20's is like going through puberty again but like psychologically haha... it's like the teen years 2.0 tbh. As much as this whole adulting thing is kicking my butt I'm really enjoying my current phase in life. Speaking as a 23 year old with no kids and only taking care of myself I love the freedom that I have right now.

[@relaxdarling9301]

Just turned 29 and OML I feel so behind. The pandemic definitely set me back, but not only that I just got burnt out. Now, I’m motivating myself to save money for a house and retirement. 🤷‍♀️ Figuring it out along the way. Thank you for making me feel like it’s okay that I’m still figuring it out. Hey, as long as I get there. Better late than never. ❤️

[@true4585]

Same and land. Own land. Fuck rent after I buy my house from scratch.

[@navytanutrof1823]

The money part!!!! You are so Right. Imagine how bad it is for men. At least women are not considered for how much money they bring for the Most part in most relationship. The societal pressures in that department are mostly on men, granted women have their own type of pressures. for us men the pressure to make money, to find money in order to find a mate to start building a family is tremendous. Jobs that were traditionally male are going away due to robotization and changes in global labor systems. Soft skills, service type jobs like office, managerial positions have men and women competing for them. And those type of jobs the women are better at them due to their natural aptidute at communication and consensus building. Couple with society becoming more hypermaterialistic so the men are not able to meet the money standard and yes they are frustrated. Great video by the way. in my head I was just 25 then I woke up and saw a couple of grey hair. In what feels like a blink of an eye, I turned 36.

[@kikox8902]

Oo, they not ready for this one. Lol. I totally see how those standards have impacted my brothers perception of their worthiness. Not feeling enough.... It sucks.

[@PRISCAOFODILE]

Exactly this makes me appreciate my husband even more. Seeing how difficult it is to make decent income, i have to appreciate him for always doing his best to provide for his family

[@mysteriouschaos3849]

Our parents were promised everything they wanted in life from working hard at one job, and they actually got it! Not so true any more.

[@jasmoid]

lmao i'm just 20 and i'm still living at home because my uni is close to home but honestly i'm like uhhhhh wtf am i gonna do when i have to move out? how do i phone the doctors??? how to take my car for an MOT?? adulting = scary!

[@SMoya-bc6tw]

Hello fellow university student still living at home. And same, I don't know how I will be living alone. All I know is that I will do it, and that's it

[@TheLeah2344]

I’m 25 and I finally got health insurance this year and I just started scheduling my doctors appointments and taking my car to the car shop. You will figure it out. Don’t worry.

[@b.6826]

Start with those smaller things whilst your living at home so it doesn’t overwhelm you when you move out x

[@AdellaAfadi]

LOL these are real questions! Tbh if I wasn’t living with my husband I’d be living with my mum. Nothing else makes sense for me 😂

[@caribanna1865]

I’m a uni student too and I wish I were living at home. Every time the rent comes out of my account I think about how much I could be saving if I lived at home 😩. Don’t move out. Save your money and don’t get into debt. There’s nothing wrong with living at home.

[@Kiwikick238]

Just turned 24 and I feel so behind. This pandemic really made things tough I feel like I’m stuck in place still living at home when I’m supposed to be out enjoying life. Almost 2 years of a pandemic Feel like my early 20s were ruined

[@candacejordan1816]

line of the day "I'm scamming you all!!!!". This video was refreshing

[@Sagieeee]

😂😂😂😂

[@AdellaAfadi]

😂😂

[@planetChristie]

🤣🤣🤣

[@216flypearls]

Lmao at the grandpa scene. The pressure comes off and the peace comes when you exit this rat race and society lying to us and just do you.

[@GetPrettyWithPuff]

a word!!!

[@MK_1Ultra]

Being an adult is just so difficult. Like, is it selfish to say I want kids but still at 30 feel I'm too young, too unsure and too broke to even try and have kids? I'm still in college!! I'm still trying to land that dream career. I'm still trying to find my home balance and a loving relationship. ADULTING is just CRAY

[@chrissyt8111]

"it's a TRAP!!" was too on point >.< I'm 35 and trust me, owning a place, having a child and being married still isn't enough to make me feel like I've figured this out. Truly the worst worst part about adulting, let's be honest and you all know it..... having to plan meals and figure out what to feed everyone everyday. Then, lets see, I can either have an awesome day at work and fail as a parent or vice versa :) The amount of times I have been asked "how do you not know this at your age?" is embarrassing lol. I could go on.

[@cinnamonflan1412]

Thank you for saying this!!!! I always thought those 3 things just made it all figured out. My self esteem just went up and I don’t want to do meal planning everyday! Just one day a week. 😂

[@123n704123]

By 25 I had over 30k saved up, no debt, a great credit score, and just got accepted into a prestigious university with a full-ride scholarship to do my masters and got married by 26... Now I am 28 moved back home 2/3 of my savings gone, asking for a divorce, ruined credit, and almost failed out of the program but I did graduate thank the one...what I learned is mental health, self-reflection, and dealing with old traumas would do me wonders rather than a credit score or bank account (would really help...lol)..if you don't value yourself or deal with those traumas they will come back to haunt you one way or another with a greater price tag.

[@nokwandatwala7600]

I'm currently 24 going on 25 in September and can I just say...the ACCURACY omg. I have a full time job, paying my own rent, my car, bills and all that - and girl I can can relate! Adulting is a pandemic on its own shem but its amazing how we just find ways of getting by and figuring it out as we go along.

[@asavelakhala9609]

In SA and resonate so much with this. My time moves so much faster now that I'm adulting. I tried waking up at 5am in summer but now we're in winter and it has become difficult. Anyway respect to our parents because wow I just can't.

[@edithkeswa3915]

Girl I feel you.My bff and I are convinced we are gonna be told a few years from now that someone manipulated time in 2020/2021 and that it was indeed moving faster..lol...because this can't be real.🇿🇦🇿🇦

[@AshTanya]

I hate how 30 is considered old especially since (in the global north) people will be living longer and longer like... it doesn't make sense

[@rahbeeuh]

Same! Had me on the brink of 17 years old crying that my life hadn't been more accomplished. I'm now in my 30s smh at 17 year old me.

[@MT-yx5cu]

So true. I was made to feel that way at 30. Now I'm 40 and just really getting a clue; I'm learning to live life on my terms. Even 50 isn't old these days if you are healthy and in shape.

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

i just turned 25 and idk if imma even MAKE it to 30 at this point; no one told me being an adult was a high risk activity 🥴🥴 A SCAM I FEAR

[@gracelikerain5039]

Me tooooo

[@gracelikerain5039]

Im scurreeed

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

@@gracelikerain5039 its the way 18 to 21 felt so slow and 21-25 felt like a commercial for me

[@gracelikerain5039]

@@COLORMIND.mp4 riiight

[@dumbdumbstupid8613]

oh god i’m 15 and y’all got me terrified

[@TheLalab4]

I’m 26 and I’m literally like how did I get here I recently moved into my first solo apartment and now I’m like wow there are so many responsibilities 😳

[@keyshawnscott12]

Time to move back with your parents or move in with friends

[@fourthgrace1803]

I’m 26 and I’m a pre adult. Living with parents and family, working, contributing financially and I’m saving up for when I become a real adult and I’m not gonna lie as much as I want to go off on my own, I’m scared to do it 😂

[@manwithaplan135]

I'm 20 and have a house and a paid off car.... I have a decent job, i got a savings and I pay everything by myself..... but I feel like I'm still behind... like I can't make friends, I'm always worrying about some Bill I didn't pay and then worrying about my health ( bad health problems started the beginning of this year). I finally started taking steps of being more in control before getting my house.... I am starting a business ( never thought I would honestly), I've gained a few trades and I am starting to feel like I'm actually getting stuff done... I've started doing hobbies that I enjoy like Martial arts, computers, exercising and traveling. I have my stuff together physically and financially, but the biggest part is that I feel like my personal life and self identification is out of whack... and finally figuring out now what I want to do for myself has opened my mind to so much more than just being "traditionally successful". Hopefully by 2025 I can update my journey, but for the most part focusing on myself has taken a whole new meaning I never thought of.

[@the_italian_weeb4732]

A good solution to this problem is to team up as humans: we must remember that tribes survived because they shared one fire in ten people, not one fire per person. Sharing the apartment, living with family and building upon what's already there is, in my view, better than creating an entirely new thing; with this method great empires were built. The value of a family is that more than one person take care of problems of more than one person, and the result is that the sum is greater than the elements apart. Now, family isn't the only format of survival, remember, there were tribes and clans, which go beyond the parents and children concept; also, the uni apartment shared by more people is also a fantastic concept and new forms of micro societies can be like that: little groups of people, related by friendship or money or love or whatever, collaborate to better live together, for example some can take care of the shelter and some can provide money or deal with shit incoming. Living alone is seen as a sign of self made but coming home to an empty apartment is sad, many memes demonstrate the concept (memes are our way of expressing emotions nowadays).

[@noirfit9721]

I’m 26. Two marriages, two divorced and a child with no father later, I realize to just take life one day at a time. Did I ever think I’d be a single mother?? No. I spent so much time trying to work on marriage that I didn’t work on myself. About to go back to school and move into my first home soon. What happens next?? Idk and idc as long as my baby girl and I are taken care of.

[@maameyaaabrafiawuah8547]

True Adella. It’s the personal pressure that we put on ourselves. Man, I wish I could just relax but it’s hard especially if you see your peers doing so well and you seem to be stagnant

[@danielbriggz]

I'm not even one minute in and I'm howling 😂😂😂😂 Edited: Me as an adult, shocked me as an adult. Truer words haven't even said

[@TheLeah2344]

I’m currently working a 9 to 5 until I can eventually leave my job and work on my business. My dream job IS my business.

[@Graciousgr8ness]

I bid you every success with your dream job being your business/owning your business. God bless you in that pursuit.

[@Dru2maBoii]

The life hacks my parents hid from us, definitely provided me with false confidence in my own success, and a lack of appreciation, for theirs. Years later, I had to apologize and exhault their commitment to figuring it all out, with us in tow...

[@elonevora]

I'm 34 and do NOT have my life together 🙃

[@imanidavis]

It seems that we make everything more complicated than it needs to be. My goal is to take one day at a time even though that's hard lol

[@cinnamonflan1412]

Word!

[@Time2Begin]

Turning 30 this year and even though I feel like a rookie at life very often, I'm also the person angsty and unconfident 15 yo me wanted to magically be when I turned 20. I think I'm living my best life tbh

[@caribanna1865]

Omggg love the video! 😭 I needed this. All I have to say is right now my early 20s and being in uni feels like awkward teen years 2.0. I have no idea what I’m doing and I change my mind like every other week. I’m already done with myself. Maybe when I turn 25 and that whole brain being developed business will help things along. All I wanna do is live in a flat by myself and comfortably afford my life with a job I enjoy and give back to my parents. But I also wouldn’t mind going back to age 2 where naps were a regular thing because sleep is therapy and there I didn’t have to cook my own meals 🥲

[@tessy28]

It's a lie. I turned 25 a few months ago. I live in my own apartment and just bought a 2 bedroom house abroad and finishing up my masters. My love life is an effing hot mess. The frontal lobe being fully developed doesn't mean a damm thing. Everything's still so stressful.😭🙈🤦🏽‍♀️

[@MeghanStark]

Why is this all so painfully true? 😭

[@Hello-rq9yx]

Ahhhhhhhh! When you said fufu and groundnut soup. That's my favourite. Glad to see another Nigerian. 😂😂🤗🤗

[@AdellaAfadi]

I’m half Nigerian but I learned that dish from my husband’s side 😂

[@tanatswadendere4975]

rolling at 2:00. Gen Z subscribed :p in my head you are my online big sister

[@iamkingsolomon]

I've given up on all of this. Capitalism, adulting, etc. It does not serve me and I'd rather live than stressing over money and bills and work

[@carolyn010]

You know what's really shocking? A KZbinr talking about real life. The fact that this is so rare is even more shocking. And sad. But thank you!

[@petrona3049]

I spent my 20's pretending to be someone I'm not and living the crazy life... thank God I made it out alive. My 30's I spent trying to figure out who I am. I'm now 41 and I still don't know who I am or what I'm doing, but now its different...I just don't care. Just living my life and doing the best I can. Add kids in the mix and there is a perpetual state wtf am I doing lol

[@carole5648]

ya know, I knew when I was young that i didn't want to grow up and have responsibility, but it doesn't help, because you still have to grow up! i saw this coming for years, i still couldn't avoid it, maybe that's on me.

[@leedahxo]

i honestly thought i would have had my shit together by 21, i would be free.... all i did was work 40+ hrs and if i had time off i would party for few hours then call it a night because of work.

[@AdellaAfadi]

😩😩

[@daelu7265]

I can relate😭😩

[@YourfriendRose]

Lmfaooooo this literally was the perfect video to come across after the day I’ve had 😭 I just turned 28 years old. I finally got my own place, I’m single and I started my own business as a photographer @roseonthelens. I’m writing a book, and business hasn’t fully picked up yet so I got a full time job. The craziest job during these times girl.... a rent collection specialist 😭 ... I’m constantly under supervision as I’m dealing with these peoples money everyday. People cursing me out daily. And having to smile and provide exceptional client service. My birthday was May 30th and a well respected and loved coworker just passed away on my birthday, and he reminded me so much of my dad, who also passed away a few years ago. I’m the oldest of 12 kids and I also just found out I’m adopted and I’m meeting my biological dad for the first time this year who lives in Brazil 😩 So now I have to plan a trip, pay rent, collect rent , girls night outs, grow a business, shave, eat, put my lashes on Lmfaooo to think I have to gracefully slay the days as a responsible adult 😂😂😂 shit is just piling up. It still amazes me how the aunties really did this out here. I also don’t even have kids yet .. I’ve been ordering dinnerly but I’m for sure going to try hello fresh! Thank you so much for sharing this video today. You’re greatly appreciated and you got this! Gained another subscriber. 🌹🌹🌹

[@Alexandriafrancescakiel]

Wow I’m in awe! You’re amazing! I wish you nothing but the best on your journey and future endeavors!!

[@neestovekin8251]

"Everything is a scam" -- yes haha! There's a great remix by Akira the Don, of Riva Tez talking about exactly this

[@nla5307]

I am 32 about to be 33 and life isnt meant to be figured out. Life is meant to be lived, to fail, to grow, to experience, to feel. Not giving a flying or swimming f### about what others have to say about it has been so liberating. Truth is nobody out here got it figured out and the majority of them are just faking it. Inner peace and happiness is what I have found to be more important.

[@e113jelly6]

Yep it amazes me to see how parents and single moms takes care of children and themselves on these salaries especially these days jobs don’t want to pay

[@amethystsimerly9275]

I think the only reason my parents were able to work FULL time and maintain a clean household/their chores is because they had 5 kids to take care of those things FOR them while they were working. In our house, cleaning and chores came first. The first thing I did when I came home from school was not homework, it was cleaning and chores. 😐 There’s no way in hell my parents’ house would’ve ever been as clean as it was without us kids.

[@jaybrick8973]

Im 31 still trying to figure life out but I do try to take in as much wisdom as I can from older people.

[@vic2485]

I’m 22 and Ik I still have ways to go but I have my own apartment and I feel this 100% still in college as well adulting is a scam I just want to travel

[@yasinradee]

Every single thing you expressed💯😩 Pre-chopped onions 🤣🤣👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 Yes cuz ain't nobody got time😩🤣

[@COLORMIND.mp4]

where yall be coppin from cuz 👀

[@Africantoothfairy]

"I am them and they are me" 🤣🤣🤣😩😩😩😩. I am tired too and I am only 28

[@sanamsitaram7940]

Same💀💀💀

[@dannieannie]

Listen!!!!!!!!!! The other day I was like...I'm not having kids in this mess!!??😂😂😂 Idk how my mom did it!!! I'm tired all the time.

[@nailswithkams]

If I am already feeling like there isn’t enough time at 14 then what the hell is going to happen when I get to 30 😂😂

[@AdellaAfadi]

Omg sis I don’t know what to tell you 😩 14? Enjoy for us all please 😅🤎

[@nailswithkams]

@@AdellaAfadi lol

[@Heykay34]

Girl as long as you breathing you got time. Please learn from us and enjoy life if possible. Death to invisible societal timelines.

[@nailswithkams]

@@Heykay34 thanks

[@sanamsitaram7940]

Isn't enough time at 14? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I'm wheezing

[@maris7]

Im 29 turning 30 next year, working 40+ hours a week, stable relationship and a mortgage. Every year I have been anticipating that next year is going to be the year when I figure everything out and have time for activities I like, and that people will have time for me too… I have yet to accept that this is likely all that there is, and we’re just gonna be too busy till the end 💪

[@will5713]

Even though I'm 17, going on 18, I feel lost when I'm *trying* to plan my life out. Everything is so uncertain and terrifying that I just can't comprehend it. It's like finding your way out of the dark.

[@Potato_binger]

Don't worry, don't think adulting as a bad things think of it as a new chapter in your life just do what makes u happy

[@dianaombe6991]

I'm 23 but let me tell you as someone that have to grow up fast, adulting it's trash. From bills to back Pain and lack of relationship. I just want to go back to my baby self

[@MeganMoon777]

Success looks different to everybody. Remember you don’t need to rich and famous to have you GOOD life

[@linx5932]

As a kid I really wish I listened to my parents when they told me to enjoy my youth. I’m currently 20 and getting my ASN and let me tell you something, I miss the days were the only thing I had to worry about was getting back home before the street lights turned on.