you’re not boring, you just lack conversational skills as a man

  Рет қаралды 182,996

Alex Costa

Alex Costa

Күн бұрын

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Talking to others is a skill that takes practice, and this guide will help you become a better speaker and listener. Watch the video to learn practical tips to improve your conversation skills. Let us know your thoughts in the comments!
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WHO AM I?
I’m Alex and my goal is to guide you to your best self through thousands of videos on self development, and self-image improvement. Consider this the modern man's guide to success. Subscribe and I promise to help you reach your full potential by upgrading your style, your hair, daily habits and overall looks.
Men's fashion, men's style, men's hair and hairstyle advice, grooming, fitness & health, dating advice, and overall self development.

Пікірлер: 159
@MarquoVitali
@MarquoVitali 28 күн бұрын
Great another person telling you what to talk about but never how to get to those topics. I'm not shy, I don't get nervous or awkward I just literally don't know how to bring up different topics or guide a conversation at all. I can do my part with somebody who is engaged and trying too but I can never get past small talk
@beanman9022
@beanman9022 9 күн бұрын
so real
@Shreyo.69
@Shreyo.69 2 ай бұрын
Being calm and confident is everything tbh u dont need the "rules" coz they are there just to make u confident in these conversations
@shloakranja1203
@shloakranja1203 6 ай бұрын
What a coincidence Yesterday I asked this question in Men’s Image Lab that how should I improve my communication skills and Alex today you posted a whole video about it..Great Job 💪🏻
@alexcosta
@alexcosta 6 ай бұрын
Thank you for being a valued member!
@Believer.63
@Believer.63 6 ай бұрын
Its been 7 years alex i am loving ur videos always ❤ Keep posting love from India❤
@vinyltheworld4092
@vinyltheworld4092 3 ай бұрын
This is a really good example of how powerful perspective is.
@Rakyr
@Rakyr 3 ай бұрын
I completely agree. Noticed this at college, i would be very social but then when i went home to the countryside where there were barely any people around. I would always start a new semester a bit out of rhythm and then i would slip back into it after a week or so.
@FogoMyYogo
@FogoMyYogo 6 ай бұрын
I needed this! I am on my way to a family reunion 😂
@TheDarkCornerX
@TheDarkCornerX 6 ай бұрын
😂 I've been there, they are usually so awkward, how'd it go for you?
@alexcosta
@alexcosta 6 ай бұрын
Good luck!
@TheDarkCornerX
@TheDarkCornerX 6 ай бұрын
@@alexcosta thanks Alex 😄
@FogoMyYogo
@FogoMyYogo 6 ай бұрын
@@dr.santanic_marco1800 😂
@FogoMyYogo
@FogoMyYogo 6 ай бұрын
@@TheDarkCornerX Definitely a lot better with Alex’s tips haha!
@isaiah3127
@isaiah3127 6 ай бұрын
Leaving a conversation with a hot topic is a lot like a writing technique for writing novels. I forgot which author said it. But basically, to never have writers block stop right before you feel you're reaching the end of something. Leave room for wonder. Also, don't think about writing when you're not writing. Which i think can also apply to conversations. I often find myself being overly critical when analyzing past conversations.
@jithesha2988
@jithesha2988 6 ай бұрын
iam literally ryan gosling
@demonsalvatore3465
@demonsalvatore3465 6 ай бұрын
Ian Somerhalder :)
@Lonewolfyash
@Lonewolfyash 6 ай бұрын
I am David goggins 💀
@GreggKocenko
@GreggKocenko 6 ай бұрын
Great choice!!
@rajdwipdutta4585
@rajdwipdutta4585 6 ай бұрын
I am literally myself
@abhay.tx__
@abhay.tx__ 6 ай бұрын
I'm DEADPOOL
@alexcosta
@alexcosta 6 ай бұрын
Don't forget to follow me on instagram.com/alexcosta Thank you for watching and have a great week! -AC
@PrinceKotla
@PrinceKotla 6 ай бұрын
Continue Fashion Inspiration Lookbook
@godpowernwachukwu
@godpowernwachukwu 27 күн бұрын
This is golden. Thanks man 👍
@thierryfleck546
@thierryfleck546 6 ай бұрын
really needed this..merci Alex
@wuasta2278
@wuasta2278 6 ай бұрын
A really good video, watched you after a long time, same energy. Love Costa
@TheVillageBeast
@TheVillageBeast 6 ай бұрын
Love the videos Bruv 🔥 keep helping the bros ❤
@RhyanLlumpera-i3f
@RhyanLlumpera-i3f 4 күн бұрын
1. Positive Mental Image - act like you're gonna be friends , Don't go overboard like you already know them - Great posture - 2. 5 step foundation - Relevant to the situation - Comment about this type of topic, you look like this personality keep it casual 3. 4. 5.
@Shreadington
@Shreadington 6 ай бұрын
I FORM new people I meet. Family, Organization, Recreation, Motivations. People like talking about themselves. Let them. Where are you from? What do you do for work? What do you do for fun? What motivated you to start that? I can talk to anyone and form a genuine connection. Works every time.
@Majesty12-12
@Majesty12-12 6 ай бұрын
There's no genuine connection these days anymore. All you have is disagreement and disappointment amongst people these days, and judgement. It simply doesn't work out like that for everyone, to have genuine connections or else I would had friends, and or a family in this world that would've accepted me. Theres no genuine love exists today either, except for the self love I have for myself.
@esued10
@esued10 3 ай бұрын
​@@Majesty12-12 deep 😢
@aidahimawan
@aidahimawan 6 ай бұрын
Great education to all of us, alex, thanks! Sending u love from Singapore😘
@nabintiwari2556
@nabintiwari2556 3 ай бұрын
I am from nepal and right now i am here in romania I have been watching your videos since 2019 and you helped me lot to learn english and better more style❤
@musicjustinjames
@musicjustinjames 6 ай бұрын
Alex, this is exactly what I needed. Please keep posting videos like these.
@rakeshsuggana
@rakeshsuggana 6 ай бұрын
Need more videos like these bro, You're my life time role model, I have watched every single video of yours including your past gaming videos to till today's video. I've learnt many things from you and still happy to learn. Thank you so much and huge love bro. ❤
@Sachu0569
@Sachu0569 6 ай бұрын
I need this this, dude always post the right thing so cool alex!!
@ΠαυλοςΕξαρχος-γ3κ
@ΠαυλοςΕξαρχος-γ3κ 6 ай бұрын
that video came just in time man
@Yooperblood
@Yooperblood 3 ай бұрын
Conversations are so hard! I spend alot of time away from people. Ive gone months without speaking outloud, then when i do try to talk its like i forget how and i stutter and mumble lol
@rockshot100
@rockshot100 6 ай бұрын
Above all it is always good to depreciate yourself a little bit, but not much. They let their natural guard down, and makes them feel more comfortable with you. Like, "wow, you play guitar? as hard as I tried to at least learn a little, I was a huge failure.". Never try to diminish whatever their accomplishments, even if you doubt it. Everybody likes to talk about themselves the most, so let them. Be humble and honest always.
@Mr_Solitude2001
@Mr_Solitude2001 6 ай бұрын
Hi alex a long time subscriber here , just wanted to let u know u stop coming in my recommendations these few years and i stop watching you a long time ago mainly after covid 19 pandemic, i search for ur channel and it feels go to see you after a long time , ur advices and tricks work well mainly not touching ur face with ur hands to reduce pimples , and style tips for all body sizes , i hope u have a great day and hope u r healthy both mentally and physically, love from INDIA
@pradosalvador5
@pradosalvador5 6 ай бұрын
You should recommend a book about this topic on how to speak to people.
@iiFreekill96
@iiFreekill96 6 ай бұрын
bro is turning every video into a business/advertisement
@ΠαυλοςΕξαρχος-γ3κ
@ΠαυλοςΕξαρχος-γ3κ 4 ай бұрын
Who doesn't do that? At least he is giving valuable advice for free that our parents couldn't have, unless they went to a specialist
@callumhigham8404
@callumhigham8404 6 ай бұрын
I really needed this and I haven’t even watched the video yet
@ajaym6795
@ajaym6795 5 ай бұрын
Lets dissect some of the things he says in this video. He gave some helpful tips but some ridiculous ones also. 1. 0:00 - What's up with him? Why would we have a conversation with everyone we meet in the next 24 hours? Who is he to dictate who we must talk to? Anyone would naturally and should feel nervous speaking to people they have no business speaking to. 2. 0:30 - He keeps acting like talking to strangers is the best thing in the world. He says we may be missing out on creating new friendships, business partners etc. Why hasn't he considered that we may have saved us tons of agony by not connecting with a potential sociopath or narcissist? 3. 0:40 - He is providing us a "framework" just to talk to people. As if this is coding. He also has the audacity to say he's keeping it simple. 4. 1:58 - He tells us to not pretend like we know everything about them. But later at 3:53 he gives an alternative for asking "What type of music donyiu listen to". He wants us to say "You seem like you'll be into Morgan Wallen". That's just lame. Be consistent dude. There are more things I can point out but it's getting boring typing so much
@davidhamming6206
@davidhamming6206 6 ай бұрын
To be honest, I think frameworks like these make conversations more complicated bc. you’re trying to stick to some conceptual system, making it harder to be in the moment and follow the natural flow of the conversation. Just be ACTUALLY interested in what someone has to say and what you can learn from them, you’ll be fine :)
@satirthautsab
@satirthautsab 6 ай бұрын
a person who has gone from ordinary to extraordinary! love from bangladesh🇧🇩❤️
@WTF_whatthefootball
@WTF_whatthefootball 6 ай бұрын
🇵🇰❤️🇧🇩
@rampageferonick5269
@rampageferonick5269 6 ай бұрын
@@WTF_whatthefootball abdul bond love from Spain
@eshw23
@eshw23 6 ай бұрын
More of these types of videos! Alex you inspire me to self develop as a man and improve all areas and see big progress over time!
@richabharti8016
@richabharti8016 6 ай бұрын
I am following you from last 2-3 yeare now on Tuesday I am will go and talk to the girl whom I like. Let's see is this trick are worth it. Thanks Alex🧬🧬❤❤❤.
@edmsmash869
@edmsmash869 Ай бұрын
I dont struggle with convos, i just struggle with making convos with women. There are no similarities or commonalities that can help me make conversations easily.
@-cobainism-
@-cobainism- 6 ай бұрын
i like this guy.
@tiniciayoung
@tiniciayoung 6 ай бұрын
Awesome points! How did you learn all of this, Alex?
@mboxblues7576
@mboxblues7576 4 ай бұрын
really good video. getting back into dating & watching a lot of these types of videos. most videos give either unactionable advice or are based in anecdotal pseudo-psychology garbage. this is none of that. really helpful. def gonna rewatch before my date tomorrow lol
@tablorder1236
@tablorder1236 3 ай бұрын
Ngl, have watched quite some videos on this topic, and you have given some solid tips
@AdrielPR22
@AdrielPR22 6 ай бұрын
He’s so handsome ❤
@fahimbinreza3194
@fahimbinreza3194 6 ай бұрын
UNIQUE MASTER-CLASS :) thanks AC
@lukavidic3303
@lukavidic3303 6 ай бұрын
Yeah maybe it’s easy in america but I live in Europe and this is a whole new world here!
@ShivamKumar-ch7tk
@ShivamKumar-ch7tk 5 ай бұрын
I leave in India....quite tough
@viscaelfutbol44
@viscaelfutbol44 6 ай бұрын
I have social anxiety, at the age of 28, it has affected my life
@NewHaven203
@NewHaven203 Ай бұрын
Am I the only one who tries to talk with people but then they end up dominating the conversation and won’t stop talking. It’s annoying
@jacobmaldonado4670
@jacobmaldonado4670 4 ай бұрын
Great value
@naveennitharwal7240
@naveennitharwal7240 6 ай бұрын
love' you brother I'm was also struggling from this problem but after the video I feel confident thanx ❤
@alexcosta
@alexcosta 6 ай бұрын
Glad to hear that, thank you! Stay strong
@ruben5027
@ruben5027 6 ай бұрын
Good video, comes at the perfect time !👌🏻💯
@stefmyt5062
@stefmyt5062 6 ай бұрын
Great video, this honestly seems like it'll help.
@amunityclips
@amunityclips 3 ай бұрын
I know many have said this already. But i literally have been trying to figure out the last like week how to approach people (mainly girls i find attractive) and talk to them. There's this girl in my film class that is shy who i really want to get to know more. And i just want to be able to not be awkward. Anyways i saw this video and i was like, "No way" so thanks!!!
@royt9195
@royt9195 6 ай бұрын
Alex def make a vid on how to do this but in a college setting
@aakashsankhla9511
@aakashsankhla9511 6 ай бұрын
Fascinating STEPS ✅ ALEX ❤️ LOVE FROM INDIA 🇮🇳
@gemologistak
@gemologistak 6 ай бұрын
love from Bangladesh ❤
@joncokejones9318
@joncokejones9318 2 ай бұрын
With ADHD it makes it hard to get the emotional connection needed
@SyedMuhammadAbdullah-ll8rq
@SyedMuhammadAbdullah-ll8rq 6 ай бұрын
Brother make video on mewing, best age to start mewing for boys, guide, results, etc. Please 🙏🏻
@The-Batman_88
@The-Batman_88 6 ай бұрын
Alex ❤
@ManvirSingh-ys9zb
@ManvirSingh-ys9zb 2 ай бұрын
Genuine
@saidianasabg908
@saidianasabg908 6 ай бұрын
i don't care about conversations and about people in this point of my life, and i think i feel better now..
@mbank3832
@mbank3832 6 ай бұрын
I get you but sometimes, you just need people for something. Not because you want to but because you have to
@CaroLI-lh2re
@CaroLI-lh2re 6 ай бұрын
True!!!​@@mbank3832
@InfiniteWealthWisdom-k1c
@InfiniteWealthWisdom-k1c 6 ай бұрын
It was impressive
@jonshawunited
@jonshawunited 6 ай бұрын
This video is great, more please Alex. :) Jon
@jimberyounglagrossa
@jimberyounglagrossa 3 ай бұрын
thanks Tony Stark ❤
@V_2077
@V_2077 6 ай бұрын
I like how every video you suggest a therapist and then plug your sponsor. We are not stupid
@tempestandacomputer6951
@tempestandacomputer6951 6 ай бұрын
God forbid the youtube content creator tries to make money on youtube
@V_2077
@V_2077 6 ай бұрын
@@tempestandacomputer6951 it's snake oil.. putting therapy as an answer to everything he does to sell his shit
@Màťàllà2020
@Màťàllà2020 6 ай бұрын
Love from india❤
@PrinceKotla
@PrinceKotla 6 ай бұрын
Man Why Don't You Make Fashion Inspiration Lookbook ?? Why Did You Stop It ?? It Helped Me Alot
@dominikfarago1250
@dominikfarago1250 6 ай бұрын
Hi Where did you get that polo shirt?
@Tacocat315
@Tacocat315 6 ай бұрын
I think to some extent a boring opening can work but you wanna smile and have good energy (and maybe poke fun at how boring the said opening you just made is😂)
@The_KarKnight
@The_KarKnight 6 ай бұрын
W video ❤
@RTFKT-CLONE-X
@RTFKT-CLONE-X 6 ай бұрын
wheres ur polo shirt from? looks amazing
@neo7759
@neo7759 6 ай бұрын
Polo shirts went out of style about 10 years ago just FYI
@anandabliss9997
@anandabliss9997 5 ай бұрын
@@neo7759no they didn’t they’re classic. Especially if you know how to style it. Trends are so short lived. Classic is best.
@neo7759
@neo7759 5 ай бұрын
@@anandabliss9997 Not even close , they are about as classic as cargo shorts. I don't do trends
@adiathasan8721
@adiathasan8721 6 ай бұрын
Could you make a video where, You talk to your 17/18 year old self And tell him, 3 things to do and 3 things not to do…❤🇧🇩
@mansurali8741
@mansurali8741 6 ай бұрын
Im literally Tyler Durden
@paxel1210
@paxel1210 3 ай бұрын
I don't like the fifth rule bcs imo its just artificial. Just be urself. If u enjoy the talk just stick to it and talk. If ppl leave bcs converstation didn't end well just go find better ppl. Let's be honest u prob can't have all the time good conversation so if that is the criteria for someone to make friends then he/she is not worth ur time. I think that's it. Just DO what YOU want.
@EmileLN
@EmileLN 6 ай бұрын
My Mom said I shouldn't talk to strangers 😂
@aidahimawan
@aidahimawan 6 ай бұрын
🤣 thats so funny
@KanwarAnand
@KanwarAnand 6 ай бұрын
I am cheteshwar Pujara
@marufibrahim4722
@marufibrahim4722 6 ай бұрын
Iam literally ryan gosling
@jasoncheng7964
@jasoncheng7964 3 ай бұрын
Just talk to someone like nothing bad will happen
@Jetha-Lol
@Jetha-Lol 6 ай бұрын
I am literally Johnny Sins
@ChetanShakya-k7t
@ChetanShakya-k7t 2 ай бұрын
What about those who think no one is like you and no one for you here Who think that he is in wrong place or society. Who bored after some time by pretending that hi like her
@TheGrayWolf-q7t
@TheGrayWolf-q7t 6 ай бұрын
Hi bro
@techsyndrome3291
@techsyndrome3291 6 ай бұрын
first !
@HKOVENOM
@HKOVENOM 6 ай бұрын
What to do if you have a Stutter?
@thomass07.
@thomass07. 5 ай бұрын
Cooked
@HKOVENOM
@HKOVENOM 5 ай бұрын
@@thomass07. fuck.
@mbank3832
@mbank3832 6 ай бұрын
Ugh. I hate people. But too bad I need to connect with them since they are useful to me
@SonalDhiman-o2u
@SonalDhiman-o2u 6 ай бұрын
I want to know fully about the girl that is in room😂😂 so i keep looking at her
@deananthony9518
@deananthony9518 6 ай бұрын
Where’s Robbi?
@aidahimawan
@aidahimawan 6 ай бұрын
They split about a year ago, bro🙂
@Goatmaximusssss
@Goatmaximusssss 6 ай бұрын
Alex you still take finasteride and minoxidil? Hair lookin better
@alexcosta
@alexcosta 6 ай бұрын
Yes I do, thank you
@Goatmaximusssss
@Goatmaximusssss 6 ай бұрын
@@alexcostacan I ask what dose finasteride you take 🙂
@monhishkaware5635
@monhishkaware5635 6 ай бұрын
i am batman
@jasonkrick1614
@jasonkrick1614 5 ай бұрын
I already talk to so many people a day. Please tell me how not to talk to so many people.
@FatNorthernBigot
@FatNorthernBigot 6 ай бұрын
It's a great shame we need this video.
@kanaadinamdar7355
@kanaadinamdar7355 6 ай бұрын
Yes, it truly is a shame
@bogse
@bogse 6 ай бұрын
I dont blame social media of this one since I had anxiety in this well before social mdeia exists, and I bet many others did too. These days I go usually, since as he said, to talk about something we have in commond:"Im wearing red underpants today, what color thong you got today if any?".
@heroic_yt-1
@heroic_yt-1 6 ай бұрын
I am ironman
@marley551
@marley551 5 ай бұрын
One in five? Gotta be like three in five
@_ScottBlankenship
@_ScottBlankenship 5 ай бұрын
I literally talk toooo much
@TheGrayWolf-q7t
@TheGrayWolf-q7t 6 ай бұрын
I just wanted to know about your actual job.
@TheGrayWolf-q7t
@TheGrayWolf-q7t 6 ай бұрын
How about your job?
@Masculinechivalry
@Masculinechivalry 6 ай бұрын
I am only afraid to start conversation with girl otherwise i can do with anyone
@adamkenton2585
@adamkenton2585 6 ай бұрын
Stop changing your thumbnail every 2 minutes
@emergencyfood7660
@emergencyfood7660 6 ай бұрын
Let him do what he wants, it's his page
@V_2077
@V_2077 6 ай бұрын
KZbinrs do it to get more views as their original thumbnail might not work
@deva77399
@deva77399 6 ай бұрын
I am Doom
@akshsinecure
@akshsinecure 6 ай бұрын
Seriously Alex🤨, how could you take Better help as a sponsor for this video. They've been found notorious for selling their customer data to Drugs & Pharmaceutical companies. So, that these medical companies can show anti-depressants products ads to make these people buy their products.
@monchichipower6334
@monchichipower6334 6 ай бұрын
Is ok to have a fixed mindset I don’t enjoy Learning as I got learning disability
@chlorine.11
@chlorine.11 6 ай бұрын
first comment pin please
@shaikhkaif6998
@shaikhkaif6998 6 ай бұрын
When are you getting married my man?
@TheDigli
@TheDigli 6 ай бұрын
He already was
@eshw23
@eshw23 6 ай бұрын
Hes to busy pimping.
@ivaibhavkr
@ivaibhavkr 6 ай бұрын
No, he hasn't been married
@mbank3832
@mbank3832 6 ай бұрын
How was he married. Robbi dumped him not that long ago
@yuvrajrai143
@yuvrajrai143 6 ай бұрын
14th comment
@slowfingers6389
@slowfingers6389 6 ай бұрын
Iam patrick Bateman
@KT-mm2uk
@KT-mm2uk 6 ай бұрын
This guy is a scam!
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