Alivia D’Andrea’s Glow Up Diet Ruined Her Life (Let’s Talk About It…)

[@audreelebdjiri727]

I have lost and gained weight several times in my life; and it is so infuriating to experience how different people treat you depending on your weight.

[@GirlVersusWild]

I think people treat you differently depending on your looks in general, whether it’s weight or attractiveness in general that changes. I’ve experienced the latter.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

this is so true, we are worth so much more than our weight

[@maggies88]

I always think it's kind of interesting. Particularly a certain type of woman who all of a sudden sees you as a peer when you are smaller.

[@nikkikoz4720]

This is me as well and to be honest I am incredibly uncomfortable when I'm thin. I don't like the way men treat me and I'm easier to kidnap.

[@CorwinFound]

Trans guy here who came out at 45 yo. I've gained and lost weight both as a guy and as a woman. Very different. Of course there is more negativity towards heavy and gaining women. But more impactful for me was the difference losing weight. As a guy no one says anything. No congratulations. No asking "how are you doing it?" No one even seems to notice! You'd think losing that positive feedback would feel negative. But it doesn't. Once I got over that feeling of stepping up to a stair that doesn't exist, it was very freeing feeling. No need to check in with people and give updates for good or bad. No worrying that I'd disappoint people somehow if my weight loss stalled. Just... me. My weight went from being a public concern to a private one. I'm not saying that men don't experience body shaming or weight discrimination or the perils of diet and fitness culture. Sadly it seems like society is trying to get men to catch up with women in this regard. But from my experience, as a white, middle aged, middle class trans guy, it has been a very different experience from what it was as a woman.

[@emilykestrel5446]

“Restriction is a setup to a binge.” Just described my whole 20s.

[@taiyabazaheer9492]

America has way too strict and unrealistic body standards from my observation as someone who interacts with Americans only online. I saw a video where Sabrina carpenter is looking perfectly skinny, she just doesn't have abs maybe because she ate a meal before. And people were saying she 'had a stomach' and they felt happy she wasn't perfectly skinny which felt weird and ironic as she was really skinny there. Thinness is a standard everywhere as it is related to health but America is unhealthily obsessed with it, coming from a north indian where being skinny is the standard and all Bollywood actresses have abs but still doesn't feel pressure and doesn't know anyone having restrictive EDs.

[@Mysteriuminiquitatis1998]

@@taiyabazaheer9492honestly some of the Bollywood actresses have a bit of a stomach as well but it just seems like what you said they don’t seem to obsess over it like us Americans do. But I guess me saying the Bollywood actresses have “a bit of a stomach” is proving your point that we are very obsessed with skinniness

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Yours and so many others 😢

[@allineedismusicnlove]

Describes 2023 for me

[@Vickyt32]

So so real

[@audreybringgold6217]

I recently spent time with an 88-year-old woman who, looking back at 30 year-old footage of herself, said "wow I wasn't that big then." And I felt so sad for her that she spent her entire life hating her body. Looking back now, she sees the mobility and beauty she had but at the time she absolutely hated her body. For me that was a catalyst for learning this message Olivia learned. Our bodies are much too valuable and special to berate them over something like size.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

thanks for sharing this!! So important

[@GirlVersusWild]

Or even beauty! There may be flaws in our younger selves, but looking back we see smooth cheeks and bright eyes and wonder why we were so hard on ourselves!

[@walterco7701]

My mom, in full dementia, was still very worried about "getting fat" even though she was eating food in portions that a toddler would have.

[@Hannah-zw9ow]

I had this experience recently with pictures from my senior year of high school. I was like “THIS is the body I was crying about??” I would love to look like that today.

[@audreybringgold6217]

@@GirlVersusWildyour comment reminds me of a scene in the Barbie movie where Barbie is sitting next to an elderly woman on the bench and Barbie says to her "You're beautiful" and the woman says "I know it." And it made me cry. Boy do we need to expand our definition of beauty! We will look back on our younger selves and see that beauty is so much more than "conventional beauty"

[@sunstar19871014ify]

I felt terrible watching her video, she’s a perfectly cute young girl but she cried so heartbreakingly because society apparently keeps telling her she’s not good enough. I am glad she’s overcome those days and found confidence in being who she was all along.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

It's heartbreaking especially knowing how common her story is

[@mister_manager]

What worries me is that she's making a return to social media, which seems to have been a huge factor in her mental breakdown to begin with. Commenters can be ruthless and the feeling of being under a microscope can't be healthy for someone vulnerable to constant criticism, which is probably almost everyone

[@vilma9142]

I felt like shit watching her video because her ”failure body” was legit almost like my body at my skinniest and unhealthiest time

[@Ghostlove92Kat]

I know, I can't get rid of wanting to lose weight only for outside validation because I'm just so tired of being looked over and not desirable.

[@cwb1400]

@@mister_manager exactly I have found a lot of these influencers put themselves out there and then they’re saddened and shocked by how people really are on the Internet. I think the best thing that most people in her position can do is remove themselves from social media and take care of their mental health.

[@alyzu4755]

We need to STOP putting our entire lives online. It never ends well. The idea that "If you didn't post it, did it even happen?" mentality is so destructive.

[@sydneynicole837]

Idk about you, but I grew up with my elder family members lamenting about how they cant remember what their parents looked like, how they wish they had a picture of their childhood room or their old school. I grew up with family members constantly taking pictures of us on disposable cameras and going to friends houses and their parents wanting to share their photos. When my cat died, I didnt have a phone yet and I only had one picture of her. I take pictures of the cat o have now incessantly. The desire to post and record is not isolated. We want to share our lives with each other, and we're afraid to forget

[@alyzu4755]

@@sydneynicole837 Yeah, I completely understand that. I mean, I have about 4,637 photos of my dog on my phone. ☺️

[@notcatherinehall9265]

We need people to stop reacting to it too. THIS video is even moreso a problem.

[@blowitoutyourcunt7675]

So glad my teen has no access to social media on her devices, it's a lot easier to Corral her back to sanity/reality when she isn't feeding crap to her brain 24/7 via tiktok. Seeing her friends going down rabbit holes of nonsense, changing their aesthetic weekly with whatever Trend blows their way and the incessantly posting about it, has taught her a lot! No she isn't the cool kid but boy is she stable and has way more common sense than any of her mates.

[@Mysteriuminiquitatis1998]

@@sydneynicole837there’s a difference between taking photos and storing them somewhere for memory sake and posting it online for all to see. That’s OP’s point

[@katelijnesommen]

Alivia should pursue documentary or filmmaking, she really has an eye for it. I'm so glad she's doing better, and I wish the same for so many others who are struggling (including me at times).

[@ZsuzsaKarolySmith]

I was thinking the same thing - she’s a great storyteller with a lovely voice to match - wise beyond her years, really!

[@cristywyndham-shaw5111]

Fat shaming is NEVER acceptable. Poor girl. Her critics are just losers who want to make her a loser, too. Their opinions should mean nothing to her. So glad she left that Glow Up world behind. 😊 Life's too short for that nonsense.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Absolutely! Very proud of hee

[@veronica5lmaa]

exactly. anyone who wastes time bringing other people down for their appearance is a loser and don't deserve your time. we should let them be misearable alone.

[@ceegee5287]

The fact that her own family and the guy she loved made her feel bad about the way she looked was devastating. I’m glad she’s doing better now 💕

[@taiyabazaheer9492]

America has way too strict and unrealistic body standards from my observation as someone who interacts with Americans only online. I saw a video where Sabrina carpenter is looking perfectly skinny, she just doesn't have abs maybe because she ate a meal before. And people were saying she 'had a stomach' and they felt happy she wasn't perfectly skinny which felt weird and ironic as she was really skinny there. Thinness is a standard everywhere as it is related to health but America is unhealthily obsessed with it, coming from a north indian where being skinny is the standard and all Bollywood actresses have abs but still doesn't feel pressure and doesn't know anyone having restrictive EDs.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Absolutely

[@RED-my9hl]

​@taiyabazaheer9492 which is so funny cuz America is the fattest "First world country"

[@cutienerdgirl]

​@@RED-my9hl Her family are Asian immigrants, and Olivia lives in Singapore. It's not America who's fat-shaming her.

[@seanwalsh5717]

Social media is SOOOO HARD on young women and girls.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

1000%

[@Leanne.Gray.]

She was a healthy weight to start with, which is so frustrating. She’d have been so much better served by having a trainer or nutritionist who could teach her common sense nutrition improvements (adding fruit/veg, getting enough protein and fiber, reasonable portion sizes) and finding movement activities that she could really enjoy. Instead she got toxic diet culture nonsense that’s practically designed to make people hate exercise and feel crippling guilt every time they’re not perfect

[@estheradriana1992]

Even when finding a trainer it can be hard to find the right one. I had a meet and greet with a PT once who basically told me I shouldn't eat bananas with breakfast, because it's too much carbs for breakfast and will mess up my blood sugar... I never had issues with my blood sugar in my life. This is after I explicitly told her I didn't want to focus on weight loss and restricting food. If you're already vulnerable I can imagine you could go along with someone like that, which would be just as harmful.

[@ngndnd]

i feel like its way too easy to become a trainer and literally every insta influencer who has worked out for 3 months think they are qualified to train other people@@estheradriana1992

[@min_nad]

That's exactly what my dietitian told me! You can't imagine how happy I feel not restricting anymore and following a diet that is for my health

[@julietcannarella6145]

That is what I was thinking. It is so sad because if you go to a public pool, or the beach etc., you will see tons of women looking like that. It is completely okay to just look like how you look like.

[@littleleah310]

she wasn’t

[@margaretblake5051]

The answer for Olivia is not a new series... it is to focus on real life

[@Denidrakes69]

Her mother, it seems, was the first to be, and continue to be, cruel to her. This is the part people are yet to understand with social media personalities. A lot of content creators are already vulnerable. That's why they can talk to a camera but often have very few people who appear to be close to them. As they become more known, we see them as famous, or as characters on a tv show, who can handle whatever we throw at them. But they can't. They've taken to talking to a camera because reality is already difficult and painful. Social media isn't only bad for the people consuming it. It can be just as dark for those creating it.

[@whatnikkidid]

I've never seen someone who needs to log off more. It's unhealthy to think about yourself and what other people think of you that much.

[@AdrienneJonesNoPointsForStyle]

This is as unhelpful as folks who criticized her for her weight changes. Please let her make choices about her life without adding your unkind comments.

[@shandi6246]

Exactly. She needs a real support system, the internet will never be that for her.

[@mald379]

exactly! The vibe is "i should not show up my glow up on the internet, i didn't love myself enough, so I'm going to show something else instead, where i validate my love for myself by finding love in the external validation AGAIN". The real lesson should be - people on the Internet will jump on you whatever you do and how well you're doing, the moment you have the smallest slip this whole thing will happen again. I think we, as a society, have to rethink exposing out private lives online.

[@MeganSin]

I always say there is a difference between aesthetic health and actual health. I think more people need to understand that what celebrities and influencers are promoting is aesthetic health. You look “healthy” but are you actually healthy? Seeing her breakdown and try to convince herself that what she was doing was trying to “be her best self” it hurt my heart. I just wanted to give her a bear hug.

[@Kx____]

I feel so sad for her, she's still so incredibly young as well. The whole "glow up" era was so toxic, I feel very sad for young folks these days. It's difficult out there when you are insecure and young. I hope she finds herself and starts loving herself.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

I hope the same for her!

[@Lashlove16]

I recently lost a significant amount of weight and ppl are sooo different. It’s sad

[@AdrienneJonesNoPointsForStyle]

It's awful, right? I needed new hips and insurance wouldn't pay until I changed my weight. I'm so disheartened by how differently people treat me now and the comments they make. I have been the same person every day of my life, however much fat I'm wearing under my skin. I will still be the same person if my weight rises again.

[@kitarapatricia6985]

I remember seeing her Glow Up Diaries and thinking to myself that I hope she establishes a good relationship with herself. After that, I saw her video with that celeb fitness trainer sprouting stuff about how she's "undisciplined". I feel sorry for her but at the same time, not surprised.

[@raedog68]

I did that in my 40’s. I was vegan and doing yoga and Irish dance 7 days a week. I am 5’9” and got down to 125, which was more muscle than fat. I was down to about12% fat. My boobs went from a D cup to an A cup. I was extremely vascular. I looked 10 years older. Allowing myself to gain again was really, really hard. I literally gained 10lbs in about 2 weeks. Now I sit at 145-155lbs, and I look and feel so much better. I was one more lb away from a full blown ED. Hitting 40 really messed with me because of how we are viewed in this country. Im 55 now, and much healthier and happier.

[@ChaiMoose]

Im so happy for you! Remember health is more important than looks :)

[@paytvn]

To add onto the Biggest Loser talk, my uncle's ex-wife was a contestant on this show many years ago. Both her and her mom, actually. It wrecked both of them mentally for the rest of their lives, and they ended up gaining all that weight back and then some.

[@emeowlyclaire]

Alivia’s video so beautifully and viscerally captured the absolute agony of finding yourself wandering down the path toward an ED, only hers was so publicized and open for mass criticism of her body. I’m so happy she found herself and some happiness that doesn’t revolve around warped societal standards of her body. Also so thankful she shared that part of her journey because it was healing to watch.

[@courtney7076]

Alivia does such a beautiful job documenting her journey. What a story teller. I don’t know if film was what she was taking in school but I would be excited to see her doing documentary film making.

[@hopeard3512]

I agree! She has talent! ❤

[@TaMarAaQ]

Exactly what I was thinking. It broke my heart to see her suffer that much while she is such a good storyteller and I think she has a bright future making documentary style video's, it's so sad that she used it to accidentally ruin her self esteem

[@loveinsearchofwords]

When I heard her cry I heard me cry . It’s sad how women around the world get caught up in this cycle. I’m struggling a little right now bc I’ve been sick and had to take time off of my fav workout and I’m starting new medicine that may make me gain weight. But I’m trying to keep positive and be kind. Being healthy is what matters. It’s just hard knowing the way you get treated when you’re fatter. This woman is truly an inspiration. I hope her life gets more amazing and fulfilling by the day

[@jodynuttall3215]

You're so right that health is THE most important thing. You sound very wise.

[@Sophie-kd8nq]

It was a whole era of so called "glow ups", mine also didn't go as planned...

[@AbbeysKitchen]

I'm sorry😥

[@ixagonczi]

Yeah same, I used to be the strongest in my class... I trained away my muscles but hey they are coming back, remember that the most important thing is how you feel not how you look!

[@Esthie229]

I went on a crash diet after seeing so many fitness influencers with sixpacks. I got thinner, more toned and I was miserable. Went to a dietician and started eating way more and gained some weight. I then started going to a different gym and random women would comment on how amazing they thought my body was. That really made me realize how social media had completely distorted my self image

[@sarbearr4]

“That tells me that your body was willing to fight for your life.” These videos feel like therapy. Thank you Abby and her whole team for your commitment to healing others and factual nutrition information considering the results of long term habits. ❤

[@Progressivelyyou]

Ive yoyo dieted once too many times. Now, Ive been on a slooooow, calmmm, felxible weight loss journey, losing maybe a pound a month and you know what? Thats okay. Itll take the time itll take, Im taking care of my body and enjoying life. Thats all.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Amazing!

[@MichiruEll]

Same here, I'm working with a very chill dietician. I've lost 4 kg in as many months. Which kinda means it's gonna take several years to get me to be "just" overweight (if that ever happens). But honestly, whatever; I'm more at peace than I've been for a long time.

[@katelijnesommen]

Wonderful! Not only is this approach so much more enjoyable, it also will have better results in the end. Your chance of keeping (most of) the weight off is much higher if you lose it slowly. Great going!

[@Runco990]

Accepting yourself, and NOT caring what others think is the hardest thing in the world.

[@peytonlbeyer]

This is such a slippery slope. I am on a fitness journey after 3 kids in 4 years. It's SO easy to see the positive results and say, "Hey, if I work out a little harder and eat less, I'll see more!" I can proudly say that I have been able to stick to a healthy, and appropriate journey.

[@jessicamolina745]

So glad for you! I had 4 kiddos in 6 years; after 2, I lost a significant amount. I beat myself up when I failed to keep it off after my 3rd kiddo, was frustrated after getting back to my first pre-pregnancy weight (I was overweight at the start of my marriage). My youngest is 2 and I am working my way down slow and steady ❤ It has been so key to have a solid community as well as a strong support system in my family!

[@peytonlbeyer]

@jessicamolina745 way to go! That is definitely not easy while chasing 4 kids!

[@hopeard3512]

Same. Taking it slow and giving myself grace. My goal is healthy habits and consistency. To just feel good. It’s videos like these that help me in my journey.

[@Kathywake23]

Congrats!!!! On the kiddos. But most importantly congratulations for caring for yourself! You deserve it!

[@HotCoffeeLove]

You don't even have to put your journey or results on the internet for people to feel entitled to have an opinion. I lost about 30 kg (66 lbs) when I was 16 and the amount of people that came over to me and made comments on my weight and how much better I looked now was crazy. Relatives, distant acquaintances, TEACHERS. They all said that to my face. And I was so scared of how hard they were going to judge me and how gleeful they would be if I gained some of it back.

[@pearl_b]

Lemme tell you the amount of RAGE I felt at the people in her life telling her she was fat constantly as I was watching this video 🫠🫠🫠

[@Lauren_veggiesaurus]

My heart breaks for her. I’ve been there, just not quite to that degree. I started out wanting to be healthy and ended up obsessing about calories and weight. 10 years later, I still have to work to find balance to silence my inner critic. People, you are worth more than what you look like and you were put here for a reason! YOU MATTER!

[@Renee-3]

Thanks so much for sharing this comment. I’m doing the same work as you and two weeks out from my wedding at a larger size than I have been in years past and it’s hard to not nitpick. It’s hard to let go of thinking this is the end all be all.

[@cristinabock1310]

Freedom from diet culture is amazing! Enjoying a restaurant meal and not setting a foot in the gym to “make up for it”. The amount of mental space and energy that you can put towards other more satisfying things. 🙌🏽

[@DarthYoungling]

The thing about 2020 and COVID glow ups was that the community itself was nice where you didn't feel alone. There were a ton of people working out at home in very obtainable settings for most people (no gyms or studios). So it made it feel like you could do it, because everyone was doing it! To say I was miserable as I glowed up would be an understatement. I'd look in the mirror and be satisfied but then see someone looking better than my progress and amp everything even more. I couldn't stop comparing. I was doing very typical ED behaviors while justifying it as everyone else was doing it.... This time around I avoid all dieting videos and online communities (this channel excluded bc I consider it more repair).

[@Kimiyainreallife]

Fatphobia is one of the most disgusting and life-ruining phenomena to ever happen to someone. Shaming someone over their weight or “health” NEVER works. Nobody deserves to be treated less than human because of their size, their health, their ability and their appearance. How did this even become acceptable??

[@viviannichols3582]

I don’t think it’s possible to stop people from expressing opinions. I think the problem that’s in our control is how we react to what people say. According to the charts you can find online, I’m at the lower end of a healthy weight. Recently, a coworker said to me, “I can tell by looking at your body that you eat a lot.” Now, he said this sarcastically. But I still freaked out and lost 5-10 pounds. This guy did not intend anything negative by what he said. He thought of it as a joke or maybe even a compliment. He perceived me as confident and healthy enough to not overthink a comment like that. I don’t blame him at all. I blame my own thought process. I interpreted this as an expectation. If someone sees me as a confident, slim person, then I feel I have to live up to that. I think I have some degree of body dysmorphia. I look in the mirror and don’t see someone thin enough to make thin jokes about. I stepped on the scale to see an objective reality and decided that number had to be lower. The real question is why do I think this way? I need to get to a point where I don’t react this way. I realize I can never stop people from saying something potentially triggering. I can only work on not getting triggered.

[@milkflavored]

@@viviannichols3582how you took what was said is how you took it, but I still think it was an out of line thing for him to say. It’s the idea that people think saying things like that, even as a joke or compliment, is more on you than on them, is a problem. Let’s stop commenting on people’s bodies without invitation

[@Kimiyainreallife]

@@viviannichols3582what that guy said to you was completely out of line (no matter how he meant it). How much you eat, weigh or exercise is completely none of his business and is never a reason to make you feel bad about yourself.

[@viviannichols3582]

I just think we can tell people to shut up about others’ bodies until we’re blue in the face, but it isn’t going to happen. You can’t change someone else’s behavior, only your own.

[@Kimiyainreallife]

You don’t need to change his behavior but you can certainly remind him that his comments are not welcomed and that your body is none of his business ❤️

[@politereminder6284]

12:39. It's true that weight shaming makes one gain weight. I was on a roll with my weight loss until September, when someone who wanted to be malicious fat shamed me. I put on almot 20 kilos. Back on my health journey now 💪

[@dreamofskye7400]

10 years ago at the age of 43 I went to see a naturopath. Up to that point I have kept my same weight since high school effortlessly by logic, common sense and intuitive eating. He told me that I needed to eat a severely restrictive (bland) diet for the rest of my life, otherwise I would get sicker and sicker. I never managed to start his diet cause something switched in my brain that day and scarcity mentality set in. It is now 10 years later and I have never managed to start his diet. I have put on 30 kg since then. And I do indeed feel sick all the time. It is only through Abbeys videos that I managed to find the woman I lost at 43 again and started eating better. All my joint pain has gone and I’m slowly loosing weight.

[@saraperez624]

Completely off topic but, your hair looks so good, Abbey 🤩

[@CathDaddy]

Was thinking the same thing lol

[@OkayestChemist]

09:45 Definition of r-naught (R0): When you're ill, how many others you get sick. Just in case anyone else was wondering! Not a physical illness transmission at this point, but definitely a mental illness one.

[@MichiruEll]

Thank you, I had heard the term in epidemiology before but never thought of it in the context of disordered eating, so the dots did not connect in my brain.

[@samanthakennedy4416]

With love: I do wish, and have been wanting, you to more videos like this with a greater overtone of empathy for the misinformed people you portray in your videos. Snark is funny and witty, but I think your positive messaging and solid information can get lost in it sometimes.

[@Eli-zx2rg]

People do treat you differently when you gain/lose weight. I was very heavy for a long time and was extremely confident in myself. But when I lost half my weight and was suddenly skinny, everyone started treating me a lot better. I felt bad but was reassured with the idea that "people treat you better when you feel better in yourself and more confident! It's not the weight, it's the confidence :)". And then I re-gained most of the weight. My confidence didn't change at all. My personality was 100% the same. But I saw and felt the difference in how people treated me again. "It's because you're exuding less confidence!!" Girl?? No I'm not. I'm just fat again and people can't seem to wrap their heads around me being a real person with real feelings when they aren't physically attracted to me.

[@evilbunnyzombie]

This needed to be said. Diet culture is pervasive and workout culture is a sneaky one.

[@iamsomanyppl666]

I had EDs when i was 14, due to trauma, i know now, i didnt knew back then. Spent 5 years in a mental hospital specialized in EDs, I quitted before they thought i was ready to quit, bc i felt it wasnt helping me rlly. It got me to eat better in that time, but it wasnt helping me in my other aspects in life, like the trauma that made me develop EDs in the first place. After i quit, i went back to very low weight, eating like sht and all that. Only when i started actually processing my traumas, i started to actually eat better and love my body for what it was and keeping health as a priority, than looks. Its hard, and i cant stop feeling sad for all the ppl that r now falling in basically the same things i fell when i was 14. But when i was 14, i got into this basically myself (like yeah, diet culture was always a thing, but it wasnt widespread like its now due to social media), and i was one in 100 cases of this kinda behaviors. Now with social media, glow up culture, diet culture, perfectly curated feeds and all that, its SO EASY for traumatized teens and adults to fall into this. It rlly makes me sad bc i was there, i knew how its like, and i know how it hurts. I rlly hope they all can get out of this. I rlly hope all social media fcking crash and dissapear at this point. Its incrediblely dangerous. Its incrediblely sad. My heart is out with all those who are suffering. You cant change yourself (or others) out of shame. The only way to change and be better, is out of love. I rlly hope ppl understand this one day. We deserve to be happy, no matter how we look, or what we do. We deserve to be happy and to be respected, no matter how we look. We deserve to live, not just survive.

[@glassofkiffies4034]

I stopped watching Alivia’s original video as it was not healthy and her mental health was clearly struggling. I say this with respect, I did not want to see her suffer but also knew it would not benefit myself mentally either. I wish her well x

[@jennywang5382]

I remember watching her when I was deep into my eating disorder and I haven’t seen her since.

[@lmercuryw]

same. so weird to think that my icon was just as sick as i was

[@squeaky8586]

In 2020 I started to get healthy, ate better, exercised, and that slowly turned into an obsession. Over restricting and over exercising to the point of being lightheaded and seeing stars every time I stood up. I joined a gym and made some friends who pushed me to eat more (I wasn’t eating at all really) and, shocker, I gained half the weight back. I still struggle with restricting and binging..like feeling guilty for eating a salad (??) it’s such a hard cycle to heal from, and so hard to explain to others Thank you so much for covering this topic with grace and respect ❤

[@EvaNicole]

i think we lived the same life bc i did the same thing in 2020. i was in the “best shape of my life.” it didn’t hit me until a year later that it had turned into an ED and i was absolutely miserable

[@dancewithme7435]

I have never had a constant weight for more than one month in my life it’s soo hard to navigate through so much change constantly one month I will fit into XL then the next month into M it keeps happening in cycles which lead me to develop stretch marks and now my only aim in life is to have a constant weight that does not fluctuate so drastically

[@tearsofawaterfall2656]

It’s so crazy for me to watch you now in a healthy place with food, and to watch you react to the videos I used to watch when I was struggling with food that made me feel better/ helped me normalise these unhealthy attitudes/ behaviours towards food. It’s so eye opening to how bad things could have become for me and how bad so many videos online are

[@alisonmcalistair]

Girl your hair is so cute in this vid! And what an outfit! I am inspired, I should pick up a plaid blazer

[@leahbottone6375]

Loved the final words you left us with Abbey. You're right, everyone deserves to be happy regardless of where they are in life.

[@Hunter-vp3he]

If you’d like to skip past the sponsorship part: 2:15

[@helloadoptee]

I've found so much joy in a good variety of peloton workout. They bring me joy and make me feel confident, judgement free. I love it...its changing my life. Xoxo I wish we can all find self love and self care in movement

[@cass465]

All of Olivia’s videos were so hateful towards herself, regardless of where she was in her journey. She was either saying “I’m so lazy and disgusting” or “I wasn’t losing weight because I was so lazy and disgusting”. And honestly there was no point in her weight loss where she seemed actually happy.

[@CloeWorkman]

Alivia’s journey changed my life and encouraged me to seek a healthy lifestyle after seeing her ups and downs ❤

[@marija3969]

Abbey, things you're sharing are so important for our society. Thank you for doing your job. It is reassuring and supportive for young women. 🙏

[@sumdumpitch]

Not going to watch the whole thing, but hopefully there is some acknowledgment from Abby of how reactionary videos can affect the mental state of the one being reacted to.

[@mercy9458]

I think Alivia is pb the most honest about her journey... It's transparent and relateable, especially for girls in her generation.

[@Glowwithchrissy]

I'd like you to cover hailey gamba and her weightloss! I'm curious about your take on the situation

[@florenceouellet4445]

All the talk about how you have to be willing to sacrifice all enjoyment and tell yourself you deserve to die everyday in order to look good is shocking to me. It just goes to show how powerful diet culture is, because if that is true (big if) and we were all thinking rationally, nobody would make that tradeoff!

[@cass465]

Seeing her breakdown and have a full on panic attack about comments possibly noticing weight gain makes me think of that Jemima Kirke quote “I think you guys are thinking about yourselves too much”. And this isn’t a diss, it’s just that this mindset is a result of being chronically online and obsessing over yourself. I don’t know a single thing about Alivia other than her obsession with her weight. Her hobbies, her interests, her goals that aren’t appearance related … I’ve no idea. If I was her friend, I’d tell her to log off and go do some volunteer work. Get out of your own head and live in the world.

[@Pubslife]

The best thing young women can do for their mental health is stay the heck away from social media. It’s toxic

[@claireflanagan7136]

You were one of those key board warriors. You made a video about how bad her methods were. When I saw her final glow up video from that time, I didn’t think there was anything wrong with the balance she brought into her diet. But you, you, decided to make a video about how terrible her final video was. Which was totally unnecessary. You pounced and now you’re changing your narrative about how compassionate you were during that time. You were definitely not. I like your content for the most part but truly disagreed with your response to her at that time. And I truly disagree with you about your new view at your behavior now.

[@laheladickens1644]

Exactly what I thought! I remember commenting under Abby’s video at the time defending Olivia

[@latiecastro3873]

i'm pretty sure alivia showed her video on the last 'episode' too...

[@nappymassanka179]

She was always talking from a dietician point of view. And she has not changer her discourse, if you watched the video you should acknowledge that she is still talking about the bad influence diet culture had on Alivia’s diet. Personnaly i like her videos bc she is a professional, not a self proclamed health therapist, and she gives her ”professional” point of view. If you did not see the inbalance in the first journey, maybe in a way you do subscribe to this diet culture philosophy. But this channel openly fights it. May i remind you also that Alivia herself recognised in her video that she did not have the right motivation, and mindset entering her glow up Journey. And the flash backs show how unsustainable and potentially distructive her original motos were.

[@ex-cultlady]

Yea ​@@latiecastro3873

[@ex-cultlady]

That's what I thought

[@fellforthesmell2847]

Zhanna Samsanova just passed away. Can you please do a video about her and her fruit diet?

[@__jasminephelps]

I never usually comment but I just had to say abbey you look beautiful!! The hair! The blazer! I loveee this look on you ☺️21 year old student here!❤ I’ve watched you for years I struggled with binge/restricting for years since I was 17 losing weight for college, your videos have helped me so much and now I feel I am finally at a comfortable weight just making healthier steps and I feel much better, the mentality of ADDING nutrition to diet has definitely helped me massively!😊

[@morganmugnolo5591]

I love your videos Abbey. You were one of the first dietitian creators who really taught me to listen to my body, feel for the most part confident in it, build easy balanced meals, and stop my food noise I used to have. I have always been an athlete, played D1 sports, and was always muscular and thus higher in the normal BMI range since I can remember than others around me in high school/college. I remember in high school (15yo) even when I was a swimmer practicing for 2hrs 8x a week, I would get the summary from a doctors office and see on there a note saying “I was getting close to being overweight for my BMI and I should loose 5 pounds by eating 1,200calories a day”. I often felt big compared to my peers and never was the “skinny” girl but the athletic girl. I now love how I am curvey and athletic. I don’t try to calorie count in an effort to cut 10 pounds anymore, which used to cause me severe anxiety and food noise+binging cycles. Now I eat balanced eat sweets in small amounts regularly and don’t fluctuate in my weight much. I only now realize I always have been the perfect weight for my body type. And actually many peers I used to judge myself against for being skinny are now getting into weight lifting or exercise as adults and look more and more like me.

[@azalea77]

Your hair color is amazing. Fits you perfectly!

[@Bexy]

Your analysis SO on point in this heartbreaking but way to common life journey!

[@katherinemarvell9541]

I really feel for alivia, so many of us have experienced something like this in one way or another 😢 it gets harder and harder especially with all the misinformation and influencers of the world pushing a narrative that can be dangerous.. it doesn’t help at all.. and the latest “influencer” ? Eddie abbew. I don’t know if this person is on your radar Abby but this guy is something else. Definitely worth having a look into ❤

[@Meerkat618]

Abbey, Thank you so much for using science based nutrition to help the world! I have found other nutritionist and dietitians, but you are the first one to bring in PubMed Articles. You have the most realistic food expectations, and help with the behavior aspects of weight lose and diet culture. This video helped click so much in my brain that I haven't heard from other sources and I truly appreciate this!

[@blayne2029]

social media can be such a nightmare. nobody under 21 should even be allowed to look at it. even then it can be crushing. ugh. banging content, Abbey.

[@abbycheyenne9727]

I struggle with my body image as much as the next person and while my story isnt out there like her.. it felt like I was watching myself during her break downs. I have a problem with self neglect to people please and its hard but being aware has helped so much. Deleting people you compare your body to and really just trying to make healthier decisions day by day seems to be the key. As Im watching KZbin videos ironically i just wish social media didn't exist or at least wasn't designed the way it is. Young people feel trapped and insecure and people my age can't maintain relationships because of all the influence the world has on them. I have social media and try to be aware of when I'm on it too much or when its influencing my mental health. Its not good for those who already have depression for sure. I think people need to unplug and make real connections with people and make real support circles, lines, sqares or whatever to truly expirience a healthier life.

[@albaaviles7148]

I gained back all the weight I lost during Covid (about 10kg) after I finished high school. It felt awful and my negative thoughts were making me binge even worse. I was looking for motivation to get back on track and lose the weight again but just thinking about other people’s opinions wasn’t enough. I then remembered how I felt during the time I initially lost the weight. I was energized and happy and felt comfortable with my body because I was giving it all the nutrients it needed and I was properly caring for it. I then compared it to how I was feeling at that moment and realized I had terrible sleeping and eating habits. It’s been a week since I tried to change that and I already feel a massive difference. Sure I still want to lose weight for the benefit of wearing cute clothes but that has just become a plus point, not my main motivation!!

[@SnakeAndTurtleQigong]

May everyone be happy, safe, and at peace🙏💙🌼

[@khinmyatnoe3093]

Alivia is like my online coach.She helped me so much with her stretching tutorials.Thanks her so much.Alivia you're the best❤

[@vilmathealien]

There was a time when I obsessed over losing weight. It felt rewarding, I was proud of myself. But then it slowed down and eventually stopped. And I could not keep up with my restrictive eating habits anymore and I started gaining weight again and eventually weight more than when I started. I felt like a failure. But it also woke me up to thinking why I was doing it. To look a certain way? To see a certain number on the scale? To be healthy? And I decided that the last one should be the right anwser. And for a past year or two, I just work out and have a balance diet and don't even own a scale. And I'm so much happier.

[@alyciahall1111]

I appreciate what you are trying to do to create a different narrative about health and eating. You're up against Goliath but I appreciate that ❤

[@kristalcampbell3650]

38 lbs have been playing tug if war over my body for the last few years, and it's so jarring the immediate difference in treatment whether i have gained or lost the weight. That treatment is such a dangling carrot to chase. It's really hard to have a healthy relationship with my body and not slip into poor behaviours. I know flip flopping between 2 disordered eating patterns is detrimental, physically and psychologically, though. Throw neurodivergence into the mix with food aversions that have me drawn to less nutritionally sound foods and medications that supress my appetite, and im a mess. I appreciate Abbey creating a space like this where there's actually sound advice without the body shaming and moralising of foods.

[@camileytv]

Her video was very touching! ❤ And important! To open the eyes of all of us!

[@Wildflowerz90]

She wasn’t heavy in the first place.

[@CorwinFound]

Trans guy here who came out at 45 yo. I've gained and lost weight both as a guy and as a woman. Very different. Of course there is more negativity towards heavy and gaining women. But more impactful for me was the difference losing weight. As a guy no one says anything. No congratulations. No asking "how are you doing it?" No one even seems to notice! You'd think losing that positive feedback would feel negative. But it doesn't. Once I got over that feeling of stepping up to a stair that doesn't exist, it was very freeing feeling. No need to check in with people and give updates for good or bad. No worrying that I'd disappoint people somehow if my weight loss stalled. Just... me. My weight went from being a public concern to a private one. I'm not saying that men don't experience body shaming or weight discrimination or the perils of diet and fitness culture. Sadly it seems like society is trying to get men to catch up with women in this regard. But from my experience, as a white, middle aged, middle class trans guy, it has been a very different experience from what it was as a woman.

[@Jodie_May92]

Really feeling this. After over a decade of being stuck on the binge restrict diet culture doom cycle, I finally decided enough was enough. I’m not going to let my daughter watch her mother hate her body. I haven’t dieted for over 6 months and am trying to learn to love my bigger body. I’m now coming to a point where I’m excited to add in some gentle nutrition and joyful movement in a bid to becoming healthier and I’m focusing on the non-aesthetic motivators like being able to chase my little one around the park with ease and continuing to be able to lift her easily as she gets bigger. It’s hard work, but I need to break the cycle.

[@MsPeko13]

I really felt sorry for her when she was struggling with bad acne on her face. They looked really painful. Glad she cleared those acne.

[@jrose0812]

Yay! I knew her story was a good recommendation people gave you!

[@DanielleMisc96]

Alivia is a beautiful storyteller. People who are so obsessed with other people's lives clearly have their own issues they're avoiding.

[@anerley123]

I find it heartbreaking each time a young girl starts her first diet "just to loose a few pounds". When I turned 60, looking back at my life, I realised that doing my first diet was the starting point of what is now 50 years of eating disorders. I was about ten when our mum decided, guided by our family doctor, to feed us nothing but steamed rice once a week. No vegetables, nothing but plain steamed rice that literally tasted of nothing. That must have been the time I started to binge and hide the food I could find. Even now I am on a diet journey and lost almost half the weight I had a few years ago. My whole life has been nothing but dieting and gaining weight. I have NEVER enjoyed eating in my life: food is my enemy. Tonight I am supposed to meet some people and I have been stressing for days about how I can avoid eating with them. I have experienced so much degradation when I was fat, I have lost all my trust in human beings. - The one thing that makes me happy are people like you, Abbey, that hopefully help young woman today to not fall into the traps that were set up for my generation. Understanding your body, forgiving yourself, enjoying food and developing a lifestyle that is good for you: that's what it is all about.

[@Jennamick15]

Hey Abby ❤ so happy to see you with another great video again and I'm so happy to see your protein powder brand out 🎉🎉🎉 Would you please make a video for how to get all of our nutrients needs and vitamins through the holy months of Ramadan when we break our fast And when is the right time for us to drink our coffee and how to enjoy dessert while getting enough nutrients from our meals in the breaking fast time

[@kenziemayrae3568]

This is such a interesting idea for a video, I love it! Second this!

[@shaliekk]

Dude! Your hair and makeup look great in this video!

[@heidilee3415]

Your makeup is so well done and beautiful. I wonder if you can/will ever share your routine.

[@ComaLies225]

I had a glow up a few years ago and people thought I was sick because I was so skinny (I was 110 and almost crossing the line to being underweight.) Was not fun. I was restricting too much and not enjoying it. Gained the ten pounds back (and some) and in 2023 decided to lose weight again but this time I decided to let it take its time and build muscle. It’s a slower process but I’m a lot happier now.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

So glad you're doing better!

[@pleh7019]

I lost over 35lbs, but certainly nowhere close to 10 inches! Bodies are wild.

[@shanecarter8341]

If you follow her journey, you'll see that she worked out what I would say is an unrealistic amount for anyone with normal adult responsibilities...Hence the huuuge loss in inches. She was never gonna be able to hold onto the body she achieved..Not because she's a failure, but because unless fitness is your literal career, you can't always prioritize working out & controlling every last thing you put in your mouth.

[@pleh7019]

@@shanecarter8341 I figured. I genuinely just thought it was interesting.

[@PeaceOfMindLPC]

This is why it's so crucial to have your sense of self rooted in God. The world is fickle we can't base our identity on how people treat us because we all suck.

[@cozeydaze]

It was so hard losing all the weight in my early to mid 30s and then regaining it back that I became house bound from anxiety, I knew everyone was saying 'she's put it back on' and I couldn't handle the failure. It took 18 months of trying to battle depression until I got medication then 6 months to get to the right dose to feel myself again...then just as I was about to start living my life again we went into lockdown. Now 42 trying to find the motivation to start again.

[@victoriafiend]

chronically online people problems

[@heatherh1109]

She is amazing at editing her videos. I love her creativity

[@darinanikolova6987]

I remember watching her video and "get inspired" and then your video brought me down to Earth and made me realise how hypnotising diet culture is. But I do not blame Alivia, I do truly believe she has been a victim and unfortunately, I do feel that I am struggling like her. Although it is not the world against me, it is my mom, who told me that "your boyfriend does not even feel se**ually attracted to you anymore because you are fat". Still today, I do not feel like I can lose weight, because I feel that if I do I am losing it to please her. But even if I do it for me, if I get compliments from my mom, I feel like I was never enough when I "was" fat.

[@Denidrakes69]

My mother did that to me. You know how you hear about people with eating disorders having a voice in their head? The only voice I ever heard was my mother's. Eventually, when I was 58 pounds and had been hospitalised for the best part of three years, she understood. Prior to that she'd say, "but people said those things to me and I didn't do what you're doing and look like THAT." That being said, her goal wasn't to destroy me, she was trying to protect me from being hurt by society, and the pain she'd gone through as an overweight teenager. It's crappy, but something we have to be aware of if we don't want to do the same thing to our children - or anyone else, for that matter. Just to be clear, I don't forgive her, I just have a better understanding of her misguided motivation.

[@oneyhoney]

@@Denidrakes69my mother said it was my choice 😂

[@Denidrakes69]

@@oneyhoney oh, I can beat that! My mother showed my 15yo daughter my "fat" photos - literally saying "this was the only time your mum was really fat." I was 130 pounds - and I know that because she weighed me. My daughter, who is 5ft6 and 140 pounds (and I only know that because she was weighed at the doctor) suddenly felt awful about herself. Add to that, the reason I was "fat" was because I'd been prescribed high doses of steroids for asthma. There's a reason we moved 3500 miles away from her. And btw, no, you don't have a choice when things are bad. Your mother, as I think you know, is dead wrong.

[@ameliasprague1991]

Wow. This video was honestly the most helpful information I've gotten for my mental and physical health in a long time.

[@donettefreeman8300]

I have been on this roller coaster literally my entire life. When I was a small child, I was too thin, so I ate and ate and got too fat. At age 8 I was on placebo diet pills because my mom didn’t want a fat kid. I was a healthy weight until puberty, then I gained weight again, and lost it again. I blew up after college, then literally stopped eating for years to lose the weight…. I ate iceberg lettuce and dry cheerios… I got down to 90 pounds, then gained it all back plus some after I got divorced in my 30s. I hit an all time high in weight. Then I restricted again and lived off peanut butter crackers and protein drinks and by age 40, I was thin again. Now, I’m 54, the heaviest weight I’ve ever been, and completely miserable. I feel like it’s all or none… I either eat everything or eat nothing. My step son actually won’t let me be around his kids because he said I let myself go, and he doesn’t want his kids around unhealthy people… fat phobic and toxic! Even though I know that, I feel disgusting and like a failure. And I’m not on KZbin. I can’t imagine how bad I would feel if I had the internet chiming in on my dysfunction.

[@brittanyschwab8265]

I really needed this. Thank you ladies. Much love Olivia❤

[@GirlVersusWild]

Andrea seems super honest about her journey. I wonder how much of it is a performance to gain views (while I see she is honest about her goals, etc) as it is such a smoothly articulated and edited documentary-style series, the very fact she put so much thought into filming suggests filming might have exacerbated her illness- she may have had a goal to finish her documentary as well as reach body goals.

[@coolchristiangirl190]

Sometimes parents be your biggest critics, I’m 24 and had lost 60lbs over the summer(I didn’t do nothing extreme, just simply started walking) and after the weight loss whenever I would eat sweets my mom would say “oh your eating like that again.” Whenever we’d walk pass sweets she’d say “oh we better keep her away from here(at that time I wasn’t even in the mood for sweets but got them simple because she expected me to).”

[@issypacanins6250]

I honestly hate how weight gain and loss is assigned morality like this. I lost loads of weight (10kg in a month) because I almost died and was hospitalised for weeks. When I started getting back to real life everyone around me kept commenting on how good I looked as if what they were seeing wasn’t actually a symptom of the most traumatic experience of my life and warned me about weight gain. I was the skinniest I had ever been, but I hated my body. As the weight loss was so fast and completely out of my control I found it really hard to recognise myself, but everyone else was praising me which lead to this really intense split of hating myself because I didn’t like the way I looked and then feeling guilty that I couldn’t love it like everyone else did. I eventually picked up running to introduce something that I had control over and have built a body I recognise and am happy with, but I never should have felt that way from the start. If people didn’t idolise these perceived major transformations regardless of underlying cause then it would be a lot easier to create a body you’re proud of regardless of what it looks like and how others may view it.

[@hannahmitchell87]

10:20 Those polls are really saddening. How low down are 'myself', 'my health' & 'looking in the mirror'!? At what point did we choose to value fake constructs & opinions of others above our own senses??

[@tiffanyx8577]

Why am I just realizing that I won’t hate myself out of my current situation 🥵 growing is difficult