Game of Thrones Abridged #63: Tyrion VIII, AGOT

[@lazycatchphrase8148]

For me, this chapter has one of the earliest signs of Bolton fuckery. When Tyrion is looking at all the Northern banners he sees boiling over the hills, the one banner that’s conspicuously absent is the flayed man of Bolton. It suggests that Roose was holding his own Dreadfort men in reserve while bleeding off the strength of the other houses under his command.

[@evannesbitt7852]

At the same time, even though this is a diversionary action, Roose could have very easily mismanaged the arrangement of forces to maximize casualties. Of course Roose can sell this to the inexperienced Robb as the consequence of facing off against the "fresh" and larger force commanded by THE Tywin Lannister.

[@lazycatchphrase8148]

That’s true. Roose does something similar on his way to the Red Wedding, I think. When he gets to the Twins he tells Robb and Cat that he was ambushed by the Lannisters during a river crossing and “unfortunately” is was mainly the Manderly forces in the rear that got caught in the water, and then he leaves a bunch of Hornwood bowman behind to guard the crossing, or some such. Whatever the details, it leads to mainly Dreadfort men showing up for the wedding.

[@evannesbitt7852]

@lazycatchphrase8148 and of course he sends House Glover, Tallhart and Karstark men to get senselessly slaughtered by the Mountain and Randyll Tarly at Duskendale. Roose is a mastermind of treachery.

[@OrSomeSayKosm]

jfc this guy rambles on about his complete misunderstanding of organic chemistry for like 5 minutes just to say 'tyrion is conflicted.'

[@hairlessoyster3689]

Flement Brax - The Narwhal that Occasionally Speaks.

[@matt_9112]

Years late, but quality is quality. I totally get your admiration for Flement Brax. If I was ever to write a fanfic, it would be about Adam Marbrand (such an underrrated character, that sticks around quite long actually) and the Blackfish (not as original) called "Battle of the Outriders".

[@maxmustermann9058]

Adam is a real chad.

[@btarczy5067]

George may be very insightful when it comes to understanding the human condition but he‘s also an action movie guy who can enjoy some Hongkong-style hijinks with swords. It seems a bit out of place at times but just as his glistening pillowtalk I can accept that. And I suppose that the disregard for the lives of those belonging to other social groups is something that even the relatively good guys and gals can‘t magically escape. It takes lived experiences even for characters like Jon Potter to see the humanity in the opposing side.

[@thisguy8106]

Great comment 👍

[@shrinivasganti90]

Schwift: "Not to go off on a tangent, but..." 😂😂

[@rikkeholmberg]

Thank you for this episode, Alt. Now take a deep breath and go to sleep. I think you need it.

[@stephaniemorris1706]

Thank you Amy for giving me the heads up about the live stream! Thank you Alt for a lovely surprise live stream!

[@adipsous]

I imagine Stephanie gets an amazing flush in her body whenever Schwift responds to one of her comments. She seems to be a star in the show. I'm sure most of us picture her as that smart, pretty, kind-hearted nerd that we'd all love to fun and easygoingly domesticate with.

[@catathielemann3239]

I missed last night's stream, was watching it today, and this surprise live stream came up. Thank you, Alt dear, it's going to be a schwifty weekend. And Ernest got a shoutout

[@outlawofgor4426]

I thought I caught it, but that was Daenerys VII...Hope I get a heads up next time. Talk of suckling pigs and watermelon must be heard live.

[@yeahey5947]

Twyin dislikes Tyrion cause he’s always quipping at himself self deprecatingly

[@blairdesarthe1082]

I feel like you and Exurb1a would get along really well.

[@warriormermaid6268]

i was catching up some zzz's and totally missed European time stream, typical lmao Thanks Alt, another great Schwiftiness... #SchwiftSquwad

[@stephaniemorris1706]

Deniz, I'm sorry you missed it!

[@nickjimenez3236]

oh my God, Alt-Lift-X 💪

[@ZubjectX]

Couldn't make this one sadly as was at a family do. Will try to make next one

[@smashedavo6949]

Aww, I missed the Shift ep, I missed a sneaky stream. Oh well my afternoons sorted then :D

[@stephaniemorris1706]

Smashed Avo I love and hate these surprise streams like an ASOIAF character. (Also don't believe the live stream comments. I love you more than Josh.)

[@smashedavo6949]

Hahaha, I only hate the ones I miss!!!

[@deffientllynotjalenbutler1736]

Flement Brax is my star sign

[@jolinefields3460]

12:30 saving some peasants to kill…. U see it in LOTR between Legolas and Gimli….(But they weren’t “humans” but Orcs/Uruki ) get the comparison tho and no regard for them as living beings…

[@AnarchoCatBoyEthan]

this is kind of similar to things George has said about the problem he has with the lord of the rings, the presumed genocide of whatever orcs. That wasn’t the main part of the quote though, just a tidbit your comment reminded me of. There’s actually a lot of interesting info online about this problem though, and how Tolkien changed his mind about the orcs and how he portrayed them early on vs later on being an issue.

[@QueenDaenerysTargaryen]

A dragon is no slave.

[@GrimgoreIronhide]

I disagree with your critique of Tywin's elaborate dress. Its a feature of medieval people that they preferred the garish, largely because such things were so hard to come by. We find garish things absurd today because I could go down to the corner store and festoon myself in fake gold bling for a few hundred bucks, but it just wasn't true back then. Ostentatious displays of wealth were considered genuinely impressive at the time. While the idea that it was possible to dress up to much existed, it was way way more remote from the medieval mind than it is from ours.

[@conormurphy4328]

Hard disagree on the whole Tywin armour thing. He’s literally the opposite of everything you posited him to be. He is the richest and probably the most powerful. This feels more the overt expression of him via his armor like every other character with armour has.

[@stephaniemorris1706]

Some Q's I hope Alt A's 1.) I'm glad you're pausing Schwift while S7 is airing. Those S6 videos were excellent! Does that mean you plan to do them again? 2.) Are you going to read ACOK after you finish GOT? 3.) Are you asking for new book ideas because you won't be abridging anymore ASOIAF, or is the new book in addition to?

[@liviavalverde1599]

Tee-hee "read a cock"

[@stephaniemorris1706]

Knitted Kraken, everything's a penis!

[@liviavalverde1599]

It is gnome!

[@marktravor4082]

Cash for gold as good description song!!! Amazing

[@HelciusCabral]

A kinda of late Q for you to A: are you planning or ever thought about doing an abridged series or analysis on GRRM sci-fi works? (1000 worlds universe)

[@AnarchoCatBoyEthan]

do you think shwiftys little thing talking about the negatively charged cell gibberish was because of the bit in the expanse where the (SPOILERS) gate builders kill a bunch of people by basically flipping a switch in a bunch of peoples heads all at once using a similar ish process he’s trying to explain. I am almost positive that’s why he’s thinking of that. PLS SHWIFT IF YOU SEE TELL ME IM RIGHT

[@davidrousseau100]

Roman numerals are easy to learn for someone who is illiterate though

[@miketrujillo3677]

1985

[@darthsnarf]

Happy belated birthday Karpo!

[@starwarsnerd100]

Grrm is pretty inconsistent on how gritty and realistic combat isn’t he? A chapter ago Drogo getting a nipple cut off lead to an infection and eventually death. Here Shaga can pull multiple arrows out of his flesh like it’s a minor inconvenience.

[@theanarchistcook]

The bundles of sticks were called "fasces".

[@Nosliw837]

Root for the word "fascist" for the way they would pummel the unruly voices.

[@85justintime]

where do I go for the Monday stream? isn't ti right now?

[@AStarkofWinterfell24]

Can I have more animorphs?

[@frodobaggins6684]

How does his secondary channel only have very little subs???

[@KlaraL-_-]

Thanks, this chapter was cool - Shae was introduced, Ser Flement Brax was there!! Tywin was a huge dick... And I think it´s 4 people = 4 ears.

[@TNTEQUALSFUN]

And in pig #6, its...david cameron?

[@FaeryQuiene]

thanks for the late stream Scwhift!

[@AlejandroRamirez-lg5bu]

Tripodrick

[@markpatterson6348]

This channel started way awesome but it kind of came to a grinding halt, a halt, a haltette, a haltering when it became more about tangents, you know, going off topic, going off the track, and feeling like it's super slow motion, slowest of motions, you know, motion being slow, like a stampede of snails, and not focusing at all on the text, the text, the texty text that it was actually intended to focus on with pinpoint precision of a laser beam, a laser beam, you know, a beam that pinpoints precisely where the target is.... Bloody hell. I loved the channel when it first started, it was the best idea I'd seen on youtube in a long while, but now I just turned off after the first 3 minutes when there's not even been a mention of anything relevant to the actual book. Not hating on things, I know there's a follower base for this, but holy hell is it slow and tedious to listen to if you actually tuned in to follow the original purpose of the channel, doing an offbeat audio book of what's actually written on the pages and not a repetative tangent, a tangent that repeats, a repetative tangent, a thing of repetition, that tends to be come out very slowly, you know, a repetative slow tangent that has ABSOLUTELY F**K ALL TO DO WITH THE ACTUAL TEXT!

[@noahmay7708]

He's lucky his voice is very relaxing

[@faisalkamal4319]

Stretched hummer

[@anibagchi9206]

Slytherin for life 💚

[@ExileOnDaytonStreet]

Hold on... REDUCE human suffering? What?

[@michaelalan6459]

There was/is way more rape in actual war than there is in ASoIAF. This is harsh but true, in times without rule of law and when life means little, attractive women are a trade commodity.

[@francescogulli7270]

53:43 we stay hungry we devoure

[@faisalkamal4319]

tywin- tywin

[@adriansuarez9523]

This is hilarious

[@jazwhoaskedforthis]

ALT LIFT X WORKOUT CHANNEL

[@TheComedian44]

I enjoy these #getschwifty

[@FinestSeven]

Alt lift x ^^

[@ernesttokes527]

#schwiftysquwad

[@Firmus777]

Am I the only one who gets frustrated when people complain about Roman numerals and how hard they are to read? They are not that complicated and they are not that horrible. They are bad for doing mathematics, but come on, you should know how to read them if you live in the western world, it is just basic culture.

[@TGFPdan]

But we use the hindu-arabic system in the western world?

[@ZubjectX]

Yeah, just don't make a typo when translating them...

[@Firmus777]

@TGFPdan We do use Arabic numerals, but the Romans one are still a part of our heritage and we use them from time to time.

[@markdaniel5784]

Ew a jizzum reference !

[@Dan-fu9eo]

I love the segment mate but could you maybe repeat yourself less? I mean you said how alienated and lonely Tyrion is about fifteen times in the last few Tyrion episodes, which makes it a bit less interesting... Other than that keep them coming!