An inbetweener once said..I Episode 108

[@GateraFiston]

I am a 23-year-old gay kingbitweener from Rwanda. My sexual orientation has always made me feel distinct. I've even engaged in risky sexual encounters with unfamiliar guys in an attempt to fit in with the norms of my social circle. I have watched every episode of TMI and whenever I'm faced with a questionable decision, I wonder, "What would Lydia and Murugi do?" Despite ongoing challenges, my connection with TMI has boosted my confidence, convincing me that I'm not flawed. I've made a commitment to engage in sexual activities only when I'm truly prepared. Through TMI, I've come to realize that my identity as a gay individual doesn't define my worth, and there's great strength in accepting myself. I hold immense gratitude for the wonderful women that you are and support you wholeheartedly. Dreaming to attend your live show in the future🥰🥰!!! Happy belated birthday to Mukeni and Aggy!!🥰

[@PaulineMwangi-dc9xm]

❤❤❤

[@martinmusomba7220]

My do tell!! And yes my gay friends have had sex at that bypass going to ruiru !! At the forest, karura and even at the citu council toilets

[@maryannemwangi4356]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@qkaphie00]

I am in a come we stay @23 and i wana scream extremely loudly that if you can do things the right way !!!!We need to stop normalizing ati he's young haezi lipa mahari tuishi tu adi ajipange..mbona uishi na yeye na haja jipanga ? Make sure as a woman you grounded before you wana even think of marriage..let no whatever situation lead you to living with a man before stabilizing!!!let's stop normalizing being selfless if he loves you he will WAIT!!He will want to see you successful before he gives you a kid!!Lets stop normalizing stupidity !!Lets be woke!!Men are selfish lets normalize BEING selfish to !!!Let no man keep you in his house if he has not done what he needs to do!!One day when you argue he will ask you who has married you!!Dont let that be you!

[@daphinenamuli7566]

It's the who married you for me😅😅😅

[@shammahnzaana214]

The best gift you can give your kids is to be selective about who you choose to have them with. I don't understand why y'all have kids with every person you date‼️

[@feinussayid2938]

As far as my knowledge goes, If you’re not married and you’re living under the same roof. Technically doing husband and wife duties regardless of whether there’s a child or not then it’s come we stay🤷🏽‍♀️

[@shalommirembe500]

As a 20 year old, I'm so thankful for TMI podcast. It has been a start adulthood gift 🎁 thanks again

[@ivynjoro1442]

Same here🎉

[@naomychepkogei2098]

Same 😊

[@diaryofmukii8649]

Saaammeeee I'm so glad

[@B.Wanjiru]

Saaaamee😊😊😊

[@ivychirchir3802]

Same

[@NewsFeeds-d7f]

Also I understand why people in traditional careers would be disgruntled. Traditional careers require years of education, hard work, and dedication to climb the career ladder and earn a respectable income. Witnessing socialites/ influencers gaining significant earnings and attention without seemingly (seemingly being the operative word) putting in the same level of effort, feels unfair or demotivating. Which is ok; because for the average person it’s fallacious to think that just wanting ease and that soft life means you’ll get it; it needs work. Plus there’s the aspect of comparing your own career trajectory with influencers who appear to be more successful can breed resentment esp if someone feels that they are working harder and achieving less in comparison. And in all honesty not everyone has the privilege to become influencers/socialites. It requires cultural and social capital, financial resources and a safety net, time, mental and emotional capacity etc.

[@wanjirukamanda2454]

The Supreme Court this year settled the issue of division of property upon dissolution of marriage. Matrimonial property is divided according to each parties contribution to its aquisition. A marriage certificate is NOT an automatic ticket to getting 50% of property. Actually if you can’t prove your contribution monetary or non- monetary you get nothing even with a marriage certificate. So keep a record of your contribution if you make it better yet have property jointly registered.

[@theculturedclan]

Inbetweeners, come we stay is come we stay, whether you have kids or not...as long as your cohabitation is not recognized under the law, that's by all means a come we stay arrangement. Anything legal with a document to show for it is marriage.

[@ruthkirabo6254]

I agree that we must stop encouraging single parenting/normalizing it. The scars that children who grow up in these households follow them into adulthood when it is time to actually be in relationships and intimacy. Nonetheless, it is more important for children to know love. Creating a loving environment for a child alone is better than staying in relationships where you are unhappy and loveless

[@basickenyanfoods2461]

I agree on single moms getting the short end of the stick. I'm not a single mom myself but i have family and friends that are single moms and i get triggered when i hear men say I don't date single moms. I understand that they are free to choose who not to date but alot of them say it from a point of kiburi. What do you mean you don't date single moms when you don't want to use protection? What do you mean you don't date single moms na uliruka ball? What do you mean you don't date single moms na hujatuma pesa ya pampers? Plus different circumstances lead to women being single moms

[@zitaamani5341]

“What were you doing at 18? Legs up in the air” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 that sent me 😂

[@WellnessFairy_NA]

ever since I became an inbetweener, Wednesdays became extra special!!!💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚

[@tmipodcastke]

Looooove to hear iiiitttt 🥺😍🥰

[@TheNaisenya]

💯

[@vexillajepkemboi3967]

Yesss

[@elizabethnjonjo9836]

I agree with both of you about a single mom where we stop normalizing it especially if you are young. Don't get pregnant for anyone because as a single mom it has been so difficult not only financially but emotionally and anxiety about this human being I brought to this world and am responsible for it. I would encourage any young lady out there enjoy being young and do life. There will be plenty of time to be a mom. Love you guys

[@muringombui1532]

I'm praying that when Lyd said "My man, my man, my man", somewhere in the world a man's heart rose for a moment because God knows she and he are for each other for life.❤️thank you both for the work you do!❤️❤️

[@lydiahtheuri4196]

What i think is men are not held accountable enough of there action. Especially legally.

[@graceguya1682]

On the point of come we stay, I think communication is key so that both parties can be on the same page. Sad as it is, children are not a sign of marriage. Giving him 5 kids is not a sign of marriage. People should lay facts on the ground and not assume that the other party views the arrangement as a marriage or a commited relationship. Also given the fact that in case of divorce, one has to prove contribution towards marital property, for division to occur, how does it happen in such cases?. Also people should be more selective with who they have kids with, as opposed to the current practice of children by chance ( oops) rather than by choice. It will save people a lot of heartache and drama. On the points of career _ In 2023, its more about working smart rather than working hard. Online work, content creation, influencing, e.t.c, is still work. The nature of work has evolved, and too bad, some people are still stuck in the pre_ technological era.

[@_gichohi]

I totally agree with @murugimunyi on normalizing single parent house holds. We are at a point where people are not even trying to have a nuclear set up because the acceptance and normalcy around single parents... It's a bit problematic. I get we are open minded and nonjudgmental but having a father and a mother as active participants in a child's life is really good for the child

[@Patricia_Odila]

I totally agree.

[@wambuigladyscathy2471]

Having grown up in single parent house hold, I agree with Lyd there's something some sort of void and it makes me sad when I hear single mom say that they're all their kids need, because you're not.For me that void shrank my confidence and almost made feel undeserving of certain spaces and things,what made it worse my mom chose to be single(she never wanted a marital concept & still doesn't) and to not have me get a relationship with my dad still hurts because when I asked it was already too late he had passed on .I really wish people give it a try😊

[@lilianmunyiri7391]

I've watched Tmi since I was 18 and I recently turned 20 and after all the more than 100 episodes have shaped my new chapter 🤍 in my 20 my thinking intelligence is just different.A proud inbetweener ♥️♥️

[@Dante_Seth]

The consistency from you guys is super impressive. Also I may be the only teen guy in your audience but I'm here for it

[@tmipodcastke]

Thaaankyou!! and welcome aboard 🥳

[@kiswiirose1726]

Today is my 20th birthday🎉🎉, so I am grateful to gift myself. TMI🎉 because it has helped me make some decisions in life that I see the results now...am so grateful to have you as my big sisters ❤❤❤more love to you❤❤

[@feinussayid2938]

The parents raising children as single parents should tell those children that it’s not the norm. Many of our mothers are strong and independent and had to raise us on their own but they forgot to tell us it’s bcoz of circumstances ABC so growing up we saw an absent parent household and now we think a two parent household is not that important or necessary.

[@magalienia6958]

THAT! 👏

[@malkiawaalego2552]

Great discussion as always. Evaporated fathers 😂😂😂 so true. I don’t get the resentment of careers that are not the 9-5 rat race or suffering for years and years, its an archaic mindset. Normalize accepting that some people will have an easier journey than others, and that your journey will not be identical to even your siblings. Comparison is the thief of happiness. Haki who are these people who come here to listen but don’t subscribe yawa. Si mubonyeze tu kidude yawa hawa warembo wapate paid sponsorship.

[@annewanjiru7985]

As a child who grew up around so many single parenthood, i never saw any problem with it, but listening to Lyd explain this,i think i will do better and i won't intentionally choose single parenthood

[@ceci9570]

Same I had never thought about it until recently.

[@claremungure879]

27:03 Lyd you didn’t just say the father evaporated 😂😂😂

[@ruthlynn452]

For Murugi about divorce the supreme Court in Kenya ruled that it's no longer 50 -50 but what you came in the relationship with is what you're leaving with there's no one benefiting from another unless you had joint accounts that's when it can be 50-50

[@Kavisu_Nzilani]

So am in shagz and kwa harakati za kusave data,I download the episode,sema imekuja podcast version 😂😂heh! Nilikua nafeel lost juu where are the facial expressions and all the hand holding I see,and the emotions felt,bye ntawatch kwa KZbin!!😂

[@anzalbabe]

On the normalizing men cheating part, it has to be said that some people women especially (emphasis on some) are okay with being in polygamous relationships/marriages. You say all men cheat like it’s a bad thing yet you have stuck with him through 50 other women. Let’s stop normalising absorbing “conventional” or “loud” standards when clearly you don’t agree. If you’re okay being one among several or many then sit tight. Men are sometimes given negative PR by women who enable their “negative” behaviours. Also, You find a man in a relationship/marriage, cheat with him and somehow think you are the miracle that will switch on his loyalty mode. 3 months later you’re shouting at the top of your lungs how men are dogs and they all cheat. Make it make sense please.

[@aldinahnjeri1278]

This is powerful

[@joycegathoni494]

Fantastic episode as usual. To clarify, the law on husband and wife being entitled to half of each other's properties no longer applies in Kenya. If parties divorce each spouse has to prove contribution, if one dies the spouse gets priority and life interest but not necessarily entitled to everything

[@frankiesamena1347]

I was looking for this comment. Thank you 😊 the law is changing with the times. I hope more people become aware

[@kmichaels114]

New Subbie🎉🎉🎉

[@BHS_Africa_Pod]

Lydia that lemon green is really glowing on you eish lovely 😍😍😍😍😍😍

[@JejeNdungu]

To my understanding, a come we stay is when you are living under the same roof as a couple and you are not legally married. Also, I love it whe y'al read the comments and am like Ooooh I read that one too.

[@valeriekoskei7913]

Regarding wills and marriage, a marriage will revoke an existing will unless the will was made in contemplation of marriage with a specified person.

[@estherchibutia3283]

Eishhh Lydia looks so gorgeous 😍 in that dress

[@Avijokaspa6]

Yay!!!!!!! 🥰Thank you for reading my comment! I feel seen!!!!🥰 On the conversation on promoting alcohol! Murugi and Lydia you guys are right..It is the responsibility of an individual to make decisions on how they consume alcohol, however, the media showcases alcohol like this fun drink that you must have... I got influenced when watching Love is Blind I even got the cute steel wine glasses- But as a sensible adult am able to have self-control, however, if I could have been going through a traumatic event like death, the end of a relationship, etc, I can't guarantee that wouldn't turn me into an alcoholic. Am glad you are having this conversation

[@beloncekamz2821]

I really had a horrible morning😢, watching this definitely made my day, my mood is lifted😊. Asante Murugi❤and Lyd❤, appreciate you two💐💐. It's Definitely TMIIIIIIII 🎶🎶💃🏿

[@rosemarymbonika8945]

These germs on a t-shirt. IMAGINE!! HERE AGAIN ASKING FOR MERCH.

[@tmipodcastke]

Unashout 😁

[@Ngendo58]

The best gift that life has given to me in my early twenties. I love and thank God daily for these two babes ❤

[@DiamondQuality1]

Yes, TMI is a safe space for sharing views, questioning, and evolving.

[@estherandaye5550]

If you can make money the easier way why not?? I agree with that 💯

[@StellaNyambura-qi2hb]

Me downloading and liking the video without even looking at the title.❤tmi is always🔥

[@TheNaisenya]

I agree with Lydia - you need to know the content of your spouse's will. Because being the next of Kin doesn't automatically mean you're a beneficiary. And especially a beneficiary of 50% of the property if the marriage ends up in a divorce. The Kenya Supreme Court recently ruled that a spouse has to prove contribution that justifies a claim of say 50%. So, for the wives that have their own money but choose to hoard it while the man pays all the mortage, and repays all the loans taken towards property etc - if your marriage sadly ends, know that, by law, you're not automatically entitled to 50% of his property. If he contests the equal division of property in court, then you have to prove your contribution - financial or otherwise- to justify you getting that 50% or whatever % you're claiming

[@naomikemunto6696]

The reason I get excited for Wednesday at work waiting for tmi podcast hahahaha

[@_Chrissy_K]

My favorite day of the week as a student because of these two ladies😂😂!

[@khatunyishidambasi5220]

I'm finding this issue about come we stay very controversial. Firstly, come we stay is giving marriage packages on a relationship budget! Secondly, it's giving me pickmesir😢 coz why else would you be living with him, if marriage isn't the goal🙄🤔? Lastly, it takes away from you as a woman. It makes you settle for less.

[@surpeleisurpelei7501]

For the women who don't want kids (as kids do bring a need for "permanence"), are financially okay and not an inch into weddings, marriage is neither here nor there. You cover each other legally in joint purchases, check in every couple of years to confirm both parties are still fulfilled in (actually want) the relationship. If yes, you proceed. None of the "I'm 25 and committing to be yours still at 65." Who knows who you'd be like/be into at 50 going 65? Funny enough, such do last too. There are a few around but to use well-known examples, think Oprah and Stedman. Weddings and all that brouhaha are for the majority, but certainly not for everyone.

[@preemuthoni5373]

It's Wednesday yay!🎉🎉 Lets gather and listen to the best podcast of all time ❤

[@michellemwelesa]

TMI should host a "come we stay" episode with a legal practitioner coz there's a lot to unpack from a legal perspective. Many women are in this arrangement and are not aware of the consequences or their rights.

[@Cikanyoro]

I get that part about calling our friends out or understanding we all live our lives differently

[@lilianwawira4273]

I feel like career is another full episode because people are working hard to get rich that they even forget their own dignity and also forgetting who they are 😊

[@Shiro_shididdy]

Please do more of these😅😅it was fun

[@DrRuthMwangi]

TMI is everything 😭🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@FirMoje]

Lets first appreciate the beauty. We appreciate the consistency I look forward to your episodes every week

[@mercynguma]

Nobody: Murugi: are Jackie aina and denis.... 😂😂

[@joyceyugi9266]

IT'S NOT WEDNESDAY , DEFINITELY TMI🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉. Can't wait for the sexual health episode. I'll literally save all tmi episodes for my children. Ps Jackie Aina & Denis Amoah are engaged. Been engaged for a while

[@gladysgakure780]

New subscriber here😌 💃💃💃I really can't believe I've been missing out on such unique and exciting content!! I LOVE IT HERE ALREADY!!!💓

[@wairimukariuki948]

You ladies really impact me. Alot has changed in how I see things in life since I discovered TMI Podcast. I could be having a really bad day and the sound of TMI just changes everything!! Keep on!

[@slymwende_17]

Everytime murugi speaks swahili I just laugh 😂 its so cute yet funny.

[@lilianmunyiri7391]

Kesi Njoro ..is my morning breakthrough always ♥️ Then TMI podcast ❤

[@saraphina4911]

There is no day I look forward to like Wednesdays coz the content that oozes from these Queens!

[@lucywachira4085]

I can't keep my eyes away from their faces OMG so well done

[@eunicekamau-br4ey]

I started watching TMI when i was 18 ,,,i've just turned 20 last month and am so glad TMI exist because now i see life differently ,,i know what to expect ,,the prons and cons of life choices ...THANK YOU SO MUCH @LYDIAH KM AND@MURUGI MUNYI🙏🙏

[@ivonna7916]

The first one🎉 My love for this podcast 😍❤

[@tmipodcastke]

Thanks girl 😁🥰

[@lorna3729]

Only thing I’d say that Jackie & Denis aren’t a CWS is they’re engaged. They’ve been engaged for a little while but I think the intention to get married is there 😂

[@mwathawinfred1441]

When these babes said 'we walked & we run' I felt it❤

[@marceline7264]

I wasn't too sure about this intro in the beginning but I'm now here dancing to it 😂😂🎉🔥

[@unapologeticallymega9936]

I missed this y'all 🎉thanks for the consistency coz wueh 😂 guess who is late today😢I as a top in betweener i apologize but Niko hapa Sasa watching then coming back with an actual comment ✌️hello guys ❤

[@ceci9570]

I think that a lot of us who come from single parent households; See how much our parent struggled and therefore don't want to excpect more. Also we see that in our situation being in a two parent household would be worse due to one of our parents being unfit. I also think it os different from people who grew up with divorce or seperation vs us who grew up where it was an active choice of our parents. For example my mother chose to raise my twin brother and I alone. So the idea of a two parent household seems odd because I have never experienced it so I don't even know what I am missing out on.

[@judymainalifestyle3005]

I always look forward for wednesday, aki TMi is the only podcast am really consistent on watch❤❤❤❤❤ Av learnt alot

[@susankibui3394]

Am still stuck on the intro it's so beautiful ❤

[@SunshineVickie]

Finalllyyyyy🎉🎉 I've already liked before even watching.That's how you know ❤🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@uwerajuliet]

😂😂😂😂😂the way Murugi is putting Lyd on the spot about chlamydia😂😂😂😂

[@_gichohi]

😅

[@silviamacharia9030]

I love you guys. I love you Lyd.

[@pwanja]

Thanks for reading my comment & actually getting what i was trying to communicate 100% & for provoking a whole episode Yay! Can't wait to watch it 👏

[@annienyambura2547]

Finally...this Wednesday has taken weeeeks to arrive. That's just how much I've missed today's episode. Can't wait to watch the live experience ❤❤

[@riyahshamar2222]

11:42 Joh: Ghai ,Ghai ,Ghai 😂😂😂😂

[@sophiekabiru8361]

Am so glad am an inbetweener ...I really love you guys ❤❤❤❤🎉🎉

[@WanjikuDaniels]

Looking gorgeous ladies 😍 Lyd your hair is 🔥

[@lizshee8587]

Love you ladies ❤

[@eunicejosphat5346]

You look beautiful babes 😘😘,I just love Wednesday

[@DeDollyshow]

The fact that tmi podcast is posted on wednesday i mean the day i was born , makes me feel so special , you ladies look stunning as always❤ #its definitely Tmiiiiiiiiiiii🎉

[@jessenanette7958]

Love from Rwanda

[@rosemarybonareri5318]

I'm a proud product of TMI❤it's definitely TMI 🎉🎉🎉

[@faithnamara2891]

Lydia is glowing!!!

[@ednahwakigotho]

Never missing any episode... In love with you Girls❤️

[@valentinengare3022]

It's definitely tmiii...Wednesdays are perfect because of these two beautiful ladies. I've always loved Wednesdays. ❤❤❤

[@JMandy]

I have never thought this about any other YTber, but I would actually pay to watch you guys for the rest of my life🤣 😌 Don’t be afraid to set up a patron page 💰

[@princessly_precious]

Im a 20 year old and TMI has come in so handy

[@basemathchepkirui9997]

That's why am always here 💯👌TMI for life 💪

[@childofgod3135]

commenting even before i start watching. i already know ill love it

[@tmipodcastke]

That's the energy 🔥

[@jw8856]

Btw it's not automatic that the spouse gets half. They've been many instances of men who totally leave their wives out in the will and all proceeds go to the children .

[@immaculatemoraa9539]

True

[@SafariByHal]

Mimi nawapenda tu 💗 and yaaass!! To production !! Hey Beryl ! Proud of you

[@carolinemutio8206]

I'm so happy to have come across this podcast.. Listening to these ladies is therapeutic for me.

[@_patience_]

Lyd Train wya. Where she goes we go. And that's on periodt.

[@angeliquenyagothie7076]

I am in actual come we stay, 11years babe, growing daily and kids, When i was young i just elopped and now am thinking we formalize this, hahaahaa am not ashamed but my hubby always says i will go pay mahari na time haijafika, hahaa

[@uwerajuliet]

Lovely episode❤thank you so much for sharing the different perspectives 😊

[@musinare]

Its so weird watching this and knowing it’s so pre recorded because Murugi got her locs out a while back and Lyd has the cutest goldy braids right now😂😂 How you know you are a die hard in betweener ❤

[@nasasirapatience6283]

First ugandan here today &my first comment...love you ladies

[@tmipodcastke]

How do we say welcome in Ugandan🤗😄

[@nasasirapatience6283]

Tukwaniriza 😅

[@iam_wanja6123]

No. 3... Let's go💙

[@tmipodcastke]

Leetttsss ❤‍🔥

[@JejeNdungu]

That Clamydia conversation just got me on the floor😂😂😂, well my day is made.

[@puritymwangi6530]

It's Murugi finishing her glass of wine while talking about alcohol. 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@tmipodcastke]

🤣😂😂

[@kasyambu98]

Always eager for Wednesdays because of tmi convo love you guys