Andrew Tate goes to therapy #4 - (Therapist Reacts)

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Dr. Kirk Honda reacts to a therapy session with Andrew Tate.
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Trigger Warning: This episode may include topics such as assault, trauma, and discrimination. If necessary, listeners are encouraged to refrain from listening and care for their safety and well-being.
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[@powderandpaint14]

Andrew Tate always strikes me as a scared little boy who has done everything he can to avoid emotional intimacy and expressing emotions in his adult life. The fact that he still seems to worship his father points to a lot of denial also.

[@nunpho]

Exactly, I keep saying the same thing. Including that bit about his dad who was abusive to his mum and never came home and stayed in the US for poker when they were kids. Andrew always speaks so highly of him but it's all so fake. The Tate's are scared little boys with no confidence so they use and abuse vulnerable people (this includes their adoring fans) to feel powerful.

[@test1122lol]

Because he said the primary element of masculinity, is to do what you don't want to do.. men without emotional control are dangerous..

[@LadyGreyAgeingDisGracefully]

If his father is still alive I wonder if he’s still afraid of what he’d do to him if he criticised him? He seems to be making choices/comments that would please his father.

[@nunpho]

@@LadyGreyAgeingDisGracefully nah, his dad passed away and he still acts like this.

[@test1122lol]

@@LadyGreyAgeingDisGracefully His name was Emory Tate, died Oct 17, 2015. It really shows how much he respects him. In the interview you can even see his face light up with a smile every time his father was mentioned..

[@ExtraordinaryMachine333]

I'm trying to imagine a woman laughing at him and questioning him like this and Andrew Tate not trying to hurt her. He definitely likes David

[@Chromebiscuit]

He already knows David shares a similar ideology about women and gender so that makes Andrew more receptive to him. I don't think Andrew would be open to seeing an actual licensed therapist, as most of them think his worldview is extremely harmful

[@gigiarmany]

Andrew likes men.. period

[@noprogressionisregression6854]

So I just realized something that I think needs to be pointed out. Has anyone actually considered the fact that Andrew and his brother are going on publicity campaigns to save their images because he is facing jail time??? I do not believe for 2 seconds that Andrew is serious about changing

[@CraigTheLawyer]

I think that’s fairly obvious (or maybe it’s not). But that was evident to me immediately. And actually, to your point, public interest in them has waned significantly. This video that Kirk is reacting to is actually several months old. So I do think you are right and I think this campaign, as you put it, has essentially failed.

[@test1122lol]

Saving your image does nothing to your case... It's completely irrelevant

[@CraigTheLawyer]

@@test1122lol way to miss the point. OP-and I-did not say his image has any impact on his case. I’d encourage you to re-read OP’s comment.

[@test1122lol]

@@CraigTheLawyerAnswer the question, what's the point of them going on public campaigns to save their image because they're potentially facing jail time?

[@yara-um6tx]

I made the same comment, obviously publicity stunt!

[@sunnie1809]

Dr. Honda, could you please keep modeling healthy behaviors and healthy conflict resolution so it is easier to compare and contrast? It is SO helpful when you do it and I can compare and contrast with myself, too. Thank you SO MUCH!!

[@PsychologyInSeattle]

Will do!

[@margaretm8640]

Totally unrelated but I can’t stop thinking about this… the therapist Andrew is talking to is Christopher, Lorelai’s ex, on Gilmore Girls. I was listening to his voice and thought I was going crazy.

[@MsHwisprian]

me remembering all the times my therapist said I was smart and getting super triggered.

[@mariel.2755]

I know it's a good evening when I check KZbin and Dr. Honda just uploaded

[@em8066]

Consider changing the name of the videos to replace AT’s name with a descriptor (like misogynist, or defendant in r*pe and human trafficking cases). AT makes money from social media / trending algorithms. So every mention (even when critical), and every audience engagement (including likes and this comment), boost his income. There is strong evidence that he spends that money on human trafficking and abusing others. At minimum, his coaching business encourages s*xual assault, and it’s not hard to find that in his own words. I didn’t want to watch or engage with this series because I didn’t want my engagement to fund abuse by even a penny. I appreciate and can learn from Dr. Honda’s insights, however. I’m sure Dr. Honda can continue his channel without contributing to or benefitting from AT’s dubious & harmful “business.”

[@julie91295]

It's not a direct income like every mentions make him 10 cents. It's more about his name being popular attract more people to his rhetoric who are already susceptible and buy into what he's selling. Although I completely get where you're coming from. I was literally cringe when I saw the title. But the reality is there is little we can do about his impact at this point. However, if there's a chance any of his followers/potential followers get this recommended to them, I think it will be helpful. The way dr honda approach this is less about chastising/criticizing him (altho he still made his opposition very clear) but more about seeing the pain in the human behind the persona of someone like AT. For some young men who are attracted to AT's content, they need to see smt like this. Where they're not getting ridiculed for their ideology but they are getting their feelings acknowledge and realizing there are more under the surface they might not know themselves. Dr Honda does have a very compassionate approach in this content and they want a father figure to see them and hear them. THat's why I don't think it's a bad thing to use AT's name. The algo can be a good thing here to get this to the exact demographics who need it the most. Otherwise we would be simply talking within our own echo chamber. Someone who clicked on a video with misogynist in the title is already likely to agree with dr Honda's point of view and way of thinking. Otherwise, they would just be ppl who literally just click on misogynist videos to hate on it and fight in the comments. THey're really not here to listen. Even if .5% of AT followers/prospective followers see this and start to think differently a little bit, it does a lot more good than lecturing to a room of ppl who already agree with you. That's my point of view on this. I totally understand where you're coming from as well. I just think it can go either way.

[@test1122lol]

Don't worry about your penny, he makes over $4M a week, and Not a Single Allegation was Ever Proven Once

[@test1122lol]

They Endlessly hear him Speak Against believing and doing whatever the government/media tells them, Literally Every Single Day for Over a Year...

[@test1122lol]

While Trashing the aduIt industry and its' consumers, scammers, rap-sts, etc, Every Single Day...

[@test1122lol]

He tells the young impressionable men to not be La,zy Selfi,sh Immor,al Losers like them, by spending the next 365 days doing their absolute all, Every Single Day, to be a Brand New man in the mirror in the next three hundred days.

[@RetentionLedGrowth]

I think there's no frustration in David when he's saying that Andrew has it all figured out. He validated Andrew so much with those compliments that it really soften him up. He was so happy that he opened up and admitted he's delusional.

[@kimberlyevers7031]

yep. that was hilarious.

[@janewoods6937]

Read up on this 'therapist'. It's quite scary

[@kellyhorvatin]

My husband has little to no memories before he was 10 as well. Would a singular traumatic event cause memory loss? His dad was shot (not killed) in a hunting accident and he remembers that but not much before that.

[@sarahohara4022]

The mental gymnastics are honestly impressive. His ego must be so so fragile.

[@SuperAbc12315]

Love me some Dr. Honda

[@SuperARCANGEL0]

I dream about him sometimes

[@kated3165]

The tragedy is that he did not seek serious therapy BEFORE ''coping'' by going full-blown narc.issistic and starting a sex-trafficking ring while conning other vulnerable young men and teaching them to cope in destructive ways themselves... You can see the vulnerable boy in him that needed help and healthy guidance, and its sad to see that despite his narci.ssism there seems to be a part of him that still might not be entirely beyond reach for a therapist... but it didn't happen in time to stop the destructive train wreck he became, and its unlikely he will stick to therapy long enough at this point.

[@AznGotChen]

These are all allegations. I'm not the biggest fan of tate, but we should wait for the facts to come out.

[@daisyo.6666]

@@AznGotChen Even without the "allegations", he is still spreading and influencing others to be misogynistic and homophobic, so the point still stands.

[@noprogressionisregression6854]

​@@AznGotChenthere are actually many things Andrew has stated on video that he released and the past basically proving the allegations. Have you ever listened to him?

[@AznGotChen]

@noprogressionisregression6854 and he's saying other things now. So which Andrew tate do we take his word at if his word is considered evidence? We need all the evidence to surface in a systematic and proper procedure before jumping to any rash conclusions, especially one as heavy as sex trafficking. For example, if you wanna say he's an asshole and not the best person fair enough, I'm sure there's plenty of evidence for that, but the greater the claims, the greater the evidence.

[@AznGotChen]

@daisyo.6666 what you said has nothing to do with what the person im responding said. You are just projecting your feelings of Andrew tate onto a conversation. I get that you have a lot of strong negative feelings about his persona and understandably so. However, if this video or my comments is this triggering for you, I highly suggest you find some grounding activity before or after the video instead of entering the comments section.

[@daypeanut4406]

17:35 this was nice though, to humanise someone. Or at least to believe there would be potential for a human to emerge if given safe attachment in therapy. I guess that might be a way for us to cope; believing there *must* be some good and relatability in there.

[@mi9t142]

Tate aside: Doesn't psychology and coping depend on what we're doing in life? I mean as a psychologist or in general in the first world we can talk and act as if psychology is the most important thing and to unleash every emotion and being mindful is the highest goal. But what if we have to struggle in every day life? What if we're in a war? Or living in very dangerous social environments? The joy of being someone, of reaching something, providing for family or even just surviving outweighs the pain of suppressing emotions right?

[@mi9t142]

In tough conditions you can't afford the energy to pay attention and nurture all emotions. That's why "toxic" environments arise: you can't get things done when you don't suppress some emotions. If you talk about emotions, tomorrows bread might be in danger, so you ridicule everyone in your "tribe" who wants to talk about emotions. Contrarily, for us living in a save place, we get things done BY talking about emotions (coaches, psychologists, etc.)

[@mandastarlight699]

It's interesting to think about. If you are in a dangerous environment, it is important that you understand what that looks like, so you seek help to get out of that environment. Then therapy to work through your emotions/trauma. Suppressing emotions can create other health problems later on. War veterans get ptsd, which causes a lot of different struggles. It's not like you're immune to your emotions, but you hopefully force yourself to keep going while there is still danger present (fight response), and once in safety that's when you'll feel the most of the negative emotions, is what I am assuming. But there are also other responses, flight and freeze respons. It's so complex

[@mi9t142]

@@mandastarlight699 That's actually a very interesting point. I think that many people from rough surroundings/upbringing literally need the danger because they haven't learn how to be a person in peaceful times and it's really hard to integrate into a "peaceful"/egalitarian society if you have been living with very challenging circumstances. Kirk Honda of course can't understand the Andrew Tate world (let's assume Andrew Tate represents the unprivileged people living tough lives. I know Tate might not fit into that since there is a lot of acting, pretending, money earning), so he is criticising him being a misogynist, etc. Kirk said "I don't want my wife to be submissive". It's true. For him, for his "caste", no doubt. But if it's about surviving, women need physical strong and dominant men, otherwise both won't survive. It doesn't mean that Kirk can't survive in a war, but his socialisation was shaped by another paradigm than Tates. So neither of them is just "wrong". But that's why Tate is so successful, because media, mainstream culture, well-off people ("the Matrix") diss him whereas other peoples everyday life revolves around what he is talking about.

[@mandastarlight699]

@@mi9t142 imma be real with you. I'm not a fan of Tate, not at all. Women don't need dominant men, women need men who are competent enough to have a decent job, take care of their health (extra important when small children are involved) - being a reliant source. A dominant man, who needs to control a woman is just a weak man. Those men are generally insecure and have a tendency to beecome abusive partners sadly. It's fine to have more traditional roles, but you do so in a healthy manner with mutual respect, a partnership. That's for both men and women. Both have great knowledge and insight, that is of value. When there is genuine care from both parties, there is no need for control☺️

[@mandastarlight699]

@@mi9t142 but yeah I agree that those who have been through awful things seem to find comfort in it if that's all they've known or been conditioned to live in/accept for a long time. Which is awful

[@generaljo78]

Dr Honda, I genuinely admire your ability to admit that you can often get things wrong in a therapeutic space. In my experience, that’s actually quite rare but it’s also golden. May I ask if you believe there are therapists that perhaps themselves are rather narcissistic and will often hide their inappropriate and/or negligent behaviour by misusing a patient’s mental health?

[@sarajesshorton]

Does this interview/therapy session remind anyone else of Tom Cruise's scenes in the movie Magnolia? I'm interested to see where this goes...

[@SmellyDogPaws]

Every time I see a video of AT I’m mind blown at how exhausting having a conversation with him seems to be. What an incredibly tiring person. He could win the Olympic gold medal for being uptight. Also Dr. Honda is #1 ❤

[@kaybmagic12]

For everyone watching you will be better served at watching for your self the original video, then after watching the DR Honda commentary.

[@hereforthememes]

That moment when you don't have to imagine growing up in a home with that type of alcohol abuse, anger, and other abuse. 😅 (Don't worry, I've had years of therapy and continue to go...and watching my brother raise his kids, it's clear he has been able to at least start to move on, too!)

[@hereforthememes]

Also, the memory recall thing is *fascinating*. My brother has much fewer memories of specific incidents and of our general childhood than I do. I wonder if that's because of the different ways we handled those memories (I replayed them often in my mind, wrote about them in my diary, talked to friends about them, and I know that he at least didn't do the latter).

[@mygrinningcat]

His speech pattern reminds me of Ben Shapiro. Interesting...

[@wakeupstylellc]

My dad was a drunk abusive father, who traumatized my family to an unbelievable extent. The death threats were impactful and so scary. All my siblings and I have been very psychologically devastated. My brother in particular has found a way to come to peace with the pass and take all his anger and sadness into music.

[@loisfolk5492]

I had to delete my comment because I was acting like a Republican and I’m not. Vote blue.🖖✌️💙

[@kaybmagic12]

Ohhh no not a republican! They are evil. Lol 😅

[@mananana1911]

It’s ok to have some right or left views. I don’t know what you wrote but just because it sounded right wing doesn’t mean it was a bad point.

[@Sough]

Pr

[@SparklySara16]

Dr. Honda: “I’ve only watched 1% of Andrews content” Also Dr. Honda “People hate him, rightfully so” How can you judge a person based on 1% of internet videos?

[@loveinsearchofwords]

The 1% of content has literally sparked a movement with incel and red pill culture AND talks down on women. If dr Honda did something like say the n word - even if it was just once I would know all I need to know.

[@aqeebshahbaz3306]

At least give a minute of the video without pausing by the time you reply the video I already forgot half of it because of your hypothesises and jumping to conclusions with your opinion about Tate to try and sound like you a person who follows made up laws about morality when we inherited this earth from our ancestors and exist just because of the actions that they did with nothing resembling the form of morality

[@noprogressionisregression6854]

Your comment makes no sense, because it is an insanely long run on sentence and it just isn't logical.

[@test1122lol]

@@noprogressionisregression6854You're the one who doesn't make any sense, the therapist literally didn't listen for a single minute without interrupting the video...

[@loveinsearchofwords]

@@test1122lol he is literally talking about therapy concepts not morals ????? Also KZbin has a fast forward and slow down button if you need help with comprehension.

[@test1122lol]

@@loveinsearchofwords My point was about hearing the (context) of what Andrew says, before cutting it off... For example, with context, what Andrew meant about emotions, is the fact that violent outbursts and brutal murder are actions influenced by emotions. Emotional control means controlling the ((influence emotions have over our actions)), we obviously can't control emotions themselves, which is why Andrew also says "Heartbreak? Good, now you have an unlimited source of energy you can channel in the right direction". But this therapist would never understand things like that, by continuing to cut him off again and again in less than a minute...

[@em8066]

@@noprogressionisregression6854 By the time I finished reading their comment, I already forgot half of it because it lacked punctuation and ended in about three different directions. lol Poor guy. I think he hurt himself.