Autism vs ADHD (The Difference between ADHD and Autism Spectrum Disorder)

[@treearoha]

Another symptom of ADHD for me is needing to absorb information quickly. I struggle with people who talk slowly or take ages to get to the point even if I'm genuinely interested in what they have to say. I'll often watch videos on KZbin sped up because I lose focus quickly if information isn't given to me at lightning speed. The irony of all this is that usually when I'm the one presenting information it takes me a decade and a half to get to the point no matter how fast I speak lol.

[@johannaljungqvist9359]

Hahaha this is so relatable

[@clairekholin6935]

I watch all videos at 2* speed, it is just normal for me now

[@bayarearealestate7920]

100%

[@mariadelpilarcambrabrown4176]

Absolutely me too.

[@tommzytree2787]

i don’t have adhd but i highly relate to that.

[@justshawna]

People with ADHD struggle with initiation of tasks we don't enjoy.

[@Claire-Sewings]

Exactly, its dreadful, and hard for people to understand when I forget to take my meds.

[@marisalucian9490]

And tasks we do enjoy.

[@lianncurran6801]

But also * for me personally* I usually have a lot of inertia in a new hobby but easily lose all the momentum later on. It's kind of the opposite of the example that he gave.

[@pyrrhicvictoly]

That's why I clicked on this video. I'm avoiding chores.

[@sunshinecasey]

Ooph... Very much so

[@alexandriadoing5925]

ADHD also masks. We can spend the day pretending we know what's going on when we're actually not able to process written or verbal instructions or focus on a required task. By the time we get home we're completely exhausted physically and mentally. This creates anxiety, depression, emotional disregulation, low confidence, sensitivity disorder, etc.

[@toriless]

It appears to be from being distracted. With autism you can be both distracted and focused at same time. One person just hears the loud truck going by and can not type out a youtube comment while it is doing so but another is focused typing youtube comments while being pissed that the loud truck is going by and another only see the typing and does not even sense and truck going by, ADHD, autism and neurotypical.

[@Jzombi301]

so many times ive come back from school and my mom asked what we did and i just cant answer because i literally dont remember

[@WillenaFlewelling]

I didn't know I had ADHD till I was over 50. Suddenly I understood I have spent my entire life masking, i.e. trying to be like everyone else, or at least look like I am. I seldom hear the first part of a joke or story, but laugh at the appropriate times, knowing it would be funnier if I knew the beginning. :\ I know now how much energy I spend trying to be "normal", but even now, at 67, I'm still fighting who I am, without realizing I'm doing it.

[@obsidian_oki]

Yes

[@dont_harsh_my_mellow]

You read me soooo well. 😭

[@haseebafzal4409]

The worst thing about ADHD is that if you try to look up ideas on how to deal with it, you will get 0 ADHD resources, and only get resources for Parents on how to handle chidden with ADHD. I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 26, and A lot of my past tendencies make a lot more sense now, but not being able to find resources for how to handle this is very frustrating.

[@feth7747]

ADHD is A FRAUD to hidden the INDIGO CHILDS. ADHD is the unique mind against BS the world has told everyone to listen, follow, and obey.

[@sadtosuccess]

If you haven't found it yet, How to ADHD channel is very helpful.

[@Chamindiu]

i'm 28 year old trainee electrician and i'm stressed! i don't know this is ADHD or not when i'm focused on one task time will fly and nothing is getting finished.mostly i'm zoning out and sometimes i don't understand what is people telling me.Maybe i'm Stupid.

[@JanineStoryteller]

@@sadtosuccess she is so good at explaining it and letting you know, you're ok.

[@seraphthegatekeeper]

@@Chamindiu I work in IT. I have found that, if I plan out as much as I can on paper and in my head, the reward is a lot less stress and anxiety.

[@Elmerstickers]

ADHDer “start watching comments, no longer following video”

[@sraniewbanie366]

dont attack me like that

[@Sleepy_on_the_moon]

Dude why do you gotta call me out like that

[@daisies667]

😂😂 omg

[@grace-ke8xk]

LMAO LITERALLY ME RN

[@ariellemunro4646]

Ahahaha here I am

[@SeafoamKitten]

That adhd feel when you said "you're probably not even watching anymore" and it made me come back to the vid because I got distracted and went to another tab lmaoo

[@daniyalmalikmehboob7476]

Hhh and going to the comments like me. I feelt that

[@YeshuaIsTheTruth]

I was staring off into space when he said that and it made me snap back to reality! lol

[@Gamper1]

lmao same but im not diagnosed with anything i think i might have autism though. i started thinking about how little friends i have had

[@colleen_marie]

I didn’t even process that he said that, I was doing my makeup

[@mayazimmerman6130]

Happened to me too. I was looking at my phone and was like Whuh? Definitely have ADHD and I've long thought I might also be autistic.

[@keturahspencer]

"I've canceled everything today because I have energy for this video." Words I could relate to more, may have never been spoken.

[@nicolerainier8498]

I thought that was a unique way to put things

[@seanjones3500]

Hi I am undiagnosed but have a genetic disorder I just can't not ask what you meant incase I understood it or didnt, did u say that or did the video, I took it as you and instantly agreed so much so i had to comment haha

[@Baz87100]

@@seanjones3500 He mentions it near the beginning of the video.

[@garrettwhite3922]

My favorite part of ADHD is when someone is talking to me and after a few minutes I suddenly realize I've been thinking about paying attention rather than actually doing it.

[@kenichimendoza8571]

Yeah happened to me

[@skynetrules340]

That’s me most of the time.

[@christiandk09]

Literally me in school everyday

[@nahiro12345]

I am not ashamed that my mind wonders, I politely let them know I did not pay attention and ask for a repeat. Or I try to recall whatever noise I remember them making and repeat it as if I did not hear.

[@tuaneneel1842]

Or focusing on eye contact instead of the conversation

[@umibrahimibrahim4966]

“If I speak slowly, I will forget what I want to say” this is me.

[@Mavric97]

Me too

[@smithtasticness]

Definitely me too. Like, if I don't do this thing right now it definitely will not get done. Ever!

[@Ozzyisunavailable]

immediately after he was like "Back on track, what was i saying?"

[@Spayyce]

The worst is me in the middle of a sentence and getting distracted by the smallest things. Literally in the comments typing because I have lost focus on the video 😅

[@yonta123]

Umibrahim Ibrahim meeeeee toooooo

[@weewoo8850]

"you're probably not even watching anymore" Me: *looks up from the comment section* 👁️👄👁️

[@jeremyhannah58]

Hahah1

[@Jaessae]

Watching? No. Listening? You bet! My teacher in primary school told my parents that I was usually distracted, looking out the window - one time apparently I got up and just went to play. But she also observed that if I looked up just for a second at the end of class, and looked at the blackboard, I understood it all. She was a good teacher.

[@kaylirowe1153]

Me right now...

[@MOLPESIMS]

Well, now I have to go back tosee what I missed :D

[@lanacrystal8147]

😂😂

[@barborahalova3514]

"ADHD is probably the worst named thing in the entire medical profession." - video liked

[@Aikano9]

Anti Social Personality Disorder (Psychopathy/Sociopathy), I think is worse named. They’re usually better at social than virtually everyone else, there’s a reason they tend to have high positions and such.

[@inpursuitofhappiness4873]

got a good cackle out of me thx (the " - video liked" part)

[@laurabeane8862]

This is why the Syndrome is no longer called Post-Traumatic Stress "Disorder".

[@lunar686]

@@Aikano9totally agree 😊 I think all the “personality disorders” are not only incorrectly classified, but really badly named, I think if you were diagnosed with something that essentially said there’s something wrong with your personality it wouldn’t feel that nice, sounds more like a personal attack than a diagnosis... Then again I got classified with ADHD and my first reaction was “ but I don’t feel like I’ve got deficits in attention”

[@Aikano9]

@@lunar686 I have very big deficit of attention

[@BravosReviews]

Loved the part where you said: “you’re probably not even watching anymore” because I wasn’t but I was LISTENING to it and you caught me at the exact moment my attention wandered. God it’s like you’re inside my head. You roped me right back in.

[@TheOneTrueNoName]

Yea that was crazy lol

[@Stringbean1138]

The ball bouncing was also really helpful for pulling my focus back to the video itself when my mind started to wander

[@rebekahream2276]

SAME

[@annienewman8312]

same. i picked up my knitting

[@coreyloveless606]

i think its worse that i just realized i mustve missed this part lmfao

[@eddjoestar2424]

As a person who has both ADHD and autism, let me tell you, the experience is truly difficult to put it in words One part of it is like this You're organized yet messy at the same time You want to do one of your favorite things and you're stuck deciding which one to do- Edit: Ayo, where did y'all come from-? I'm very glad that we can share our experiences here. I wanted to add another thing to this complicated experience. Chores is absolutely hell because not only can it be hard physical work at times, the whole house can become a distraction-

[@vendettamedianl]

I have ADD and suspected for years now to maybe have a form of autism light as well. I know what you mean, and when you finally chose something you're completely bored with it after five seconds so you go do something else entirely haha.

[@crackers3978]

it's like "my fridge is orderly, but everything else in my house is not lol" because the fridge is where you store the food, which has my comfort food in it, which means i need it orderly so that i can find food my lmao this, or i just have an obsession over making my fridge orderly lol

[@bladeofSteele]

I really need to see a professional because I have never related to something as much as this

[@Lifesmelons]

I-

[@SRPeeps]

@@Lifesmelons 😄🤣😂

[@990nish]

I almost cried during the motivation part. I've always been the kid who says "why why why?" I need to understand what I'm doing, why, what the benefits are, everything. That along with everything else really makes me think it's time to go to the doctor

[@valerieferro4886]

I was always a “why” kid too and got in so much trouble cuz adults thought I was being defiant ... and even at a young age I’d take each adult aside and explain “I need to know why, so I can understand the importance in order to do it” All the adults: 😳

[@SheliakDragon]

Most hated answer: "Because that's how it is!" or worse: "Because I said so!" Ugh....

[@annieb7919]

@@valerieferro4886 Me: "Why?" Other person: "Because I said so!"

[@annieb7919]

@@SheliakDragon Sorry, Sheliak. I replied before I read your comment. It seems as though we took the words right out of each other's mouth!

[@msaubrieify]

I'm that way as an adult and I infuriate some people. It's so hard. I got diagnosed as a 35 yo

[@KitmaNara]

I have both ADHD and severe depression. Depression causes that inertia he talked about; it takes a ton of energy to be able to start even simple things. Yet at the same time, my brain keeps having these great ideas of things to do, such as what plants to start, which ones need to be repotted, oooooo we should make a flower box with this wood, no I need to build a trellis, of but we also have to walk the dogs, and clean the kitchen. Then I get paralyzed because there is some much my mind wants to do, so many great things to do and learn, but I just get find the energy to start.

[@G8tr1522]

Kitma Nara damn, I can relate so hard

[@MLSMiss]

I relate 1000%! You are NOT alone. 👍

[@stephg9651]

YES! I've had such a similar flow of thoughts starting from plant ideas, too lol! It's so crazy how the mind can get so overly excited with all these awesome ideas that genuinely captivate us, yet, at the same time, those same amazing ideas become completely overwhelming all at once.

[@geminisduerme5266]

I know exactly how you feel....But my severe depression no longer exists after I started taking adderall 10mg per day which allows me to complete tasks. If you dont have goals and aren't completing them then depression will exist. The adderall removed much of my depression and allows me to complete everything I want on a daily basis but it still requires effort it just makes it easier for you to not get in ur head so much. This doesnt mean sadness or depression is completely removed as this is a normal human behavior. The adderall can just regulate u a little more so the depression isnt as severe. Its changed my life for the good but my journey isnt over because i still need to work on my diet exercise and sleeping habits which play a important part in improving ur mind and body...also i have been meditating and speaking with a psychiatrist and therapist for cognitive behavior. I hope this helps you guys. adderall was a good start for me and im still on it today after 6 months and im still working on myself but life is getting better and easier. Stay well and healthy we are not alone.

[@fjola8679]

YES! YES YES!

[@sharonamberbennett4725]

ADHD hyperfocus is exactly as you describe it is for autism. I block out all external stimuli. I could be hungry, in physical pain, etc but I block that out and just focus on whatever I'm doing. But I can't always control my hyperfocus- it usually happens only with things I'm interested in. It's also one reason why people with adhd can be late a lot. Once locked into hyperfocus it's hard to shut it off or stop what I'm doing. Also I have time blindness while in it. ( I always have time blindness but it's worse during hyperfocus)

[@slectivehearing]

when i hyper focus it’s usually when i find something new or get back into something new and it can be the only thing i think about for weeks to months until i forget about it completely and forget that it existed.

[@kragary]

I think the most important point of his explanation was that ADHD hyperfocus can only happen with activities that give that continuous stream of rewarding dopamine, it's a state that feels good, while autism hyperfocus is more mind-based, the autistic person can decide to focus on something even if it's not that rewarding or doesn't feel good. And "feeling good" in this case is not referring only to physical sensations, it's a more holistic sense of well-being, happiness, etc. I'm almost sure I'm ADHD (undiagnosed), and for me hyperfocus feels amazing, it's like my whole body and mind are thrumming with joy and excitement, to the point that minor physical discomforts become inconsequential. That's why it's so difficult to tear myself away from the activity that gives that feeling and go do something that feels like an unimportant and pointless distraction instead. It doesn't make sense for the ADHD brain.

[@garrettwhite3922]

Don't forget the irrational anger at anything that pulls the attention away from the hyperfocus

[@mntrmntr]

@@kragary In my case, when I (hyper-)focus on something, it gives me rewarding pleasure. And I believe, I can focus on anything, the difference is the amount of effort needed. A computer game grabs focus all by itself, while some other tasks require weeks of pushing myself to finally get to them. But when I finally do, it's invariably a pleasure, and I think what a fool I was, delaying it for all those weeks. So what is it more like? ADHD hyperfocus or autistic focus? (My bet ADHD)

[@slectivehearing]

@@kragary hyper focus does feel good i’ve been pretty bored because i haven’t got a new hyper focus since i injured my knee during my skateboarding hyper focus

[@skunkyraccoon7572]

As I'm watching this I keep thinking about how I often feel a mixture of both.

[@kaylavelez1424]

I am so glad i am not the only one that feels that way

[@anitafarren4590]

I'm very much both as well. And believe, there's more people who have 1 or both of these conditions that are aware of it themselves. The more I understand my own goofy issues, the more I recognize them in other people.

[@anitafarren4590]

Meeee toooo!!!

[@sabihachughtai6957]

Anita Farren p

[@StarriSprinkles]

Samee

[@armorsmith43]

ADHDer here. I sometimes seem like I am on the autism spectrum because: 1) I’ve failed to pick up on social cues/norms because I just...didn’t know what to pay attention to. 2) I sometimes hyperfocus on learning something I find rewarding. Then I’m all excited and want to tell strangers fun facts about the history of the London sewer system. 3) To avoid being a late, I am meticulous about immediately entering events things into my calendar and then creating events for the travel time. I’m naturally freewheeling and go with the flow of what catches my fancy...but I don’t want people to be disappointed in me, so I systematize.

[@SlenderGamer56]

BROOOOOO! Me fucking too!! I seriously don't know what to label myself. I feel that labeling what I feel and how I act will just make me feel sane. Sometimes I feel like a crazy person because I act and do things that are super weird to some people.

[@godsdaysp2]

Omg same!!!!!

[@Monrealese]

Saaaame!

[@bjsteg79]

Same. Also considering seeing an autism specialist to see if I may, infact, fall into an aspie diagnosis.

[@HaseoXth]

It's quite common to have both. I believe I read somewhere that 50% of children who were diagnosed with ASD also have ADHD. At 33 I have been diagnosed with both Aspergers and Combined ADHD.

[@eev14]

I'm a woman with about as obvious of a case of ADHD as possible, yet no professional or teacher etc. ever even thought of it, instead here they seem inclined to believe that women just have borderline or bipolar disorder, neither of which can be applied to me but they've tried to, never got an official diagnosis. Then recently the puzzle pieces started coming together for me and i realized i'd been struggling with ADHD all my life and nobody knew. Went to a psychiatrist and he told me i was a very obvious case, i got prescribed medication and i haven't felt this clear and motivated in pretty much ever. It's a shame we tend to think of ADHD and Autism as men's psychological problems and Personality disorders (like Borderline) as women's issues.

[@lottenbavik6649]

Eva Verheij me two but I actually got the diagnosis bypolar type 2. I didn’t mind and those meds helped some but I noticed when me and my therapist evaluated every year that I had to look hard to find somethings that could fit some criteria. I thought I was very neurotypical, just had some issues that I believed was from other things. Then me and my bonus sister met some online friends with ADHD and to my sister later they where OMG don’t you two see it. Took years to even get to do the tests since my doctor put everything in bipolar. My next realized immediately and said you can have both, let’s get you tested, the one I have know is a specialist and he has ruled out bypolar completely. For me it wouldn’t have been a big thing if I had it but it’s good to now the facts so I can get to know myself without blaming myself, well trying to atleast. Many women get misdiagnosed or have bipolar and ADHD but some doctors don’t look for more then bipolar and then they’re done.

[@FriedaTheFowl]

It's much more socially acceptable to be ADHD than it is to be labeled as borderline, though they have so much in common. I think women are generally seen as "weaker" so it's easier to think we're just neurotic, whereas men tend to have pressure to "do the right thing" so it is considered more of a behavioral issue than a psychological one, though those things are not innately separate. Look into DBT, it helps for both :)

[@pinksalt1057]

Can I ask what medication did you find effective with adhd?

[@elizabethbennet4791]

because no one in society gives a fuck about anyone any longer. that's why

[@Correctrix]

Eva, for a moment I thought this was a comment by me that I'd forgotten about, because every word of it seems to be talking about me.

[@JuanPablodelaTorre]

As an AuDHDer, it's interesting to notice that the answer to questions like "Do you talk too much or nothing at all?", "Do you enjoy overstimulating spaces or would you rather stay inside in silence with dim lights?", and "Can you switch context easily or do you need some time to adjust?" is always "Yes".

[@voriaeveningflame]

Huh... This makes me wonder even more if I have ASD as well as ADHD. I would love to get screened but so far what I've looked at takes such a long time and is more expensive than I'd thought

[@Katzenmama2024]

Agree 100%

[@HeliNoir]

THIS.

[@BreezyBriest]

100% it's such a dichotomy. I do both things. Talk too much or too little. Want to socialize but also don't want to.

[@wendybrandal7221]

Yes.

[@jaassil]

Autism: I can focus, but I need to understand why ADHD: I understand why, but I’m only going to focus if it’s really exciting

[@rahbeeuh]

Having both is chaotic yet manageable for some

[@Beetletreuse]

does that apply to having to have "all the information" about a task required of you in order to focus? Because when I feel as if I don't have all the information, it's hard for me to find the level of importance in a task someone else has asked of me to the level of urgency they expect when they don't fully explain it to the level I feel is necessary for me to understand... and then I tend to get anxiety about asking them for more information because they get annoyed and impatient with me and think I'm stupid.

[@eboethrasher]

Umm for my ADHD I can easily rabbit hole... on something trivial and far less important than the overall thing that needs done, and that is why I'm now on disability, amongst other problems it has caused for me. And that is if I am lucky and can focus at all. Sometimes what I can focus on is weeding a patio. Not exciting in the least. Yet my brain can somehow say "OOOOH LETS DO THIS FOR 3 HOURS!!!" despite there being about 17 other things I could do that would be far more useful.

[@tikimillie]

Sobs in both

[@lorjejed2]

@@Beetletreuse get out of my head! I know EXACTLY what you mean!

[@velvety_antlers]

I was diagnosed with ADHD at 12 years old. As an artist, my ability to hyper focus allows me to sit at an easel and paint for up to 10 hours at a time, often ignoring if I’m hungry or tired, because I’m determined to finish a painting. I get into a flow where time disappears and I have tunnel vision on my work.

[@valerieferro4886]

Same!!! Honestly, he mentioned so many behaviors and things an autistic and ADHD person says that should have given my parents and doctor SOO many warning signs!! It’s frustrating

[@code-dredd]

I did this with a model Harley Davidson motorcycle... started at 8:30am and finished it around 9:00-9:30pm the same day... straight w/o eating, etc.

[@Fllangees]

This is truly the beauty of it

[@Lu-kw8vw]

Me too.

[@Thisisnttravis]

Same but put me in front of the computer at work and I can't get any focus

[@Isabel-kl6gd]

The only way I can stay focused on videos is by reading the comments. I can’t just watch a video. My therapist recently diagnosed me with autistic as well as have ADHD, and tbh this video made me sure of it

[@benjaminrowberry2252]

i do that too c=

[@LewisHamiltonMSPR]

This is me for literally every video even if it's only a few minutes in length and something I really want to know about, with very, very few exceptions for ones that are at the extreme pique of my interest, but even then it's a struggle. I haven't been able to watch a TV programme, movie or lengthy online video in years, meanwhile I effortlessly spend hour after hour reading people talking about them.

[@ripley2009]

The only way I can watch videos or TV is to also be doing else at the same time. Mostly I knit. I knit until my hands hurt, but I have to be doing some kind of repetitive task or I can't focus. It has to be a repetitive task... I discovered another one I can use. Rolling beads, cutting strips of paper and rolling them into beads... that's actually a thing. There's tons of "bead rollers" on the web. But yes, like you, on youtube I also read the comments.

[@Baer1990]

I'm new to the channel and I self diagnosed myself with autism a while ago. I might have ADHD too and I'm still not sure about that. Or I'm just ignoring the evidence :P

[@celavetex]

I have ADHD,And I just wanna share my Life so far with it I had it since birth,and until 2nd Grade I didn't take any Medication,I was that one Crazy Kid Who would Be hyperactive during day and Anxious and Wide awake during night. In 1st Grade I started feeling sad,But I didn't worry about it,In 2nd I started getting Tired which was a side affect of my Medicine and me Not wanting to sleep. In third grade Nothing really Happened Except the Medication Kept me More focused,And I did math Better!By 4th I don't think I had Depression but I Got really sad,And only sadder as the days passed,I started to cheer up when I met new friends,and I would play with my brothers Alot,But on the Inside I was still sad.I'm now in 5th Grade And I am living a Great life,Today I get hyperactive And Anxious all The time,And I can never Get peaceful sleep because of my two Little brothers,Also my older brother Is autistic.

[@mcboingboingsister6258]

so, i recently found out that i was apparently diagnosed with both autism and adhd but my mom decided not to tell anyone, because she was afraid that her reputation would be affected. and she still decided to ask me why i lose focus quickly and why i struggle with communication and empathy so much. she said that if she had known i would be "less than" she wouldve gotten an abortion. im literally 12 mom.

[@lori10155]

😱 I'm so sorry your mom said that to you. That absolutely horrifies me. You are not less than, just different and that is okay. I hope that there are other people around you that at least make an effort to try to understand. If you don't know about Yo Samdy Sam, I recommend her KZbin channel. She also has both autism and adhd

[@TexasGirl-Z71]

You poor thing sweetheart I am so sorry you had to hear that from your own mother.

[@silpakaza7841]

Perhaps, it's time to diagnose the diagn-iser!!!

[@Foxisreallymyname]

Hey, I know this means nothing right now because you’re 12 and can’t live on your own, but understand that your mom could have a sickness that doesn’t involve you and IS NOT caused by you or have anything to do with you whatsoever. She sounds like she could be Bipolar, Depressed, Narcissistic, any number of things. I only say this because, I want you to know, EVERYONE has something. Every single person on this planet. So if she was worried about someone being less than, then she shouldn’t have had children. Because everyone has something. NO human is a normal, ideal human. We made that up for some reason. And I want you to know that you are perfect, just as you are. Give your mother some empathy and understand that she probably has something going on that she doesn’t know about. Don’t try to change her and try to think of it as nothing personal. Send her love and just hope in your heart that she gets help one day. You can’t fix people, but you can still love them quietly in your own heart and hope they can stop being miserable and find out what’s wrong with themselves one day. And I hope you can have the confidence to know that Autism and ADHD are your super power. Watch this channel, this guy is amazing. And focus on who you are and on LOVING yourself because YOU DESERVE LOVE. ❤️

[@Djinnthewishmaster]

Why does SHE struggle with empathy more like?! As you get older, you Definitely find your tribe. Keep strong hun, you are worthy and loved

[@_peachjam_]

So basically what I got from this was: ADHD: I understand, but I cannot focus Autism: I can focus, but I do not understand

[@kvetchnik]

i have both i cannot understand and i certainly cannot focus

[@zoeykeilbarth9930]

shinji lili me too :(

[@camila_costa12]

@@kvetchnik you made my day

[@HayLeesHomeMade]

@@kvetchnik this is me I've been seen thank you

[@valdavermillion4545]

I can't focus, and I don't understand. Damn.

[@tanyacarbajal3597]

When you talked about being a kid masking at school and crashing at home being too exhausted to mask anymore, it made so much sense to me why my son is perfect at school but has a meltdown when he gets home. I thought for so long that I was doing something wrong.

[@itsyaboichilde5397]

Glad you realized it :D sometimes parents don’t even want to understand

[@allyinthewonderlandz6675]

Is it mean all these kids are autism?I though all kids are like that,lots teacher told me their kids act like that too.

[@brendaleelydon]

Yup. I've had to explain this to my kid's other caregivers (& even remind myself sometimes!). In the same vein, it kinda explains why kids will lash out at their primary caregiver - they had to work *SO HARD* at keeping it together & "being good" all day at school/a sleepover/parental visitation day, & now they're in a safe space, with a person they trust loves them unconditionally, & not only can they finally take off the dang mask, there's a lot of pent up emotions (good & bad!) that sorta just spill out. My kid & I are working on finding ways to help her decompress in a more acceptable way, that doesn't hurt me or her and actually gets her needs met, vs just exploding her emotions. :-D

[@blaqgurl]

I felt the same way. Have me some 😮‍💨 relief.

[@kaylaschroeder1]

Just get home and plop on the couch... for hours... lol

[@Maria-ug3pw]

I was diagnosed with Asperger's and ADD 10 years ago when I was a 12-years-old girl and I remember the relief I felt when my mom gave me a pamphlet about autism to read and it pretty much described my daily life. I cried because I realized that there was nothing wrong with me and that I was simply a little different and that that is okay :)

[@popinmo]

How do you know you have both?

[@thegreatcanadianlumberjack5307]

I never knew i had it until i was told when i was 6 that i have Autism (And aspergers as well since at the time they were both under the same thing), Epilepsy and OCD i was 3 when i was diagnosed, i remember going to the Hospital and the Doctor was making me follow her finger using my eyes and i was put in an MRI that day. It feels good because i have been told by Medical professionals that i would never see the day i would be able to do things on my own or have a job. I am 25 years old rent my own place, Have a wife, Work as an electrician and do things like anyone else. But the thing is i stay very quite about it Because of the stigma attached to it although not as bad compared to 20 years ago. But it has cost me Jobs and made people view me diffrently.

[@popinmo]

@@thegreatcanadianlumberjack5307 idk I suck at everything I don't know if I can work

[@thegreatcanadianlumberjack5307]

​@@popinmo of course you can. My reccomendation is and this really helped me is to find a Work placement program. They are super helpful and some actually pay you throughout the program as well. No one sucks at everything. Trust me i used to feel that way and it was not a good feeling getting let go every 3 months. until i was told about that and i was able to find not only my Career but a job that i could hold down and learned what i was doing wrong. One of them was disclosing my Disabilty

[@nicoleowens2318]

You're very lucky. My mom told me to shut up and deal with it, just act like everyone else, that I was bad, I was always in trouble in school and at home because I couldn't focus, calm down, sit still, or deal with overstimulation, then developed behavioral issues and struggled in every possible way with life until now, my 30's, when I was finally able to be diagnosed with both conditions and everything made sense. It was only when I got my daughter help and learned about the symptoms of her conditions that I started to understand myself, and I also cried like a baby. I don't mean to overstep but I hope you have told/tell your parents that their support made all the difference, because it definitely does, and maybe thank them if you feel so inclined, because it is nice to hear as a parent where we went right, we tend to focus a lot on our shortcomings. Imagine going another 20 years like that before you figured it out! It's not an easy life. I'm glad you were able to get clarity on it young, and I wish you all the best in managing your superpowers lol, when you understand your strengths and weaknesses the sky is the limit.

[@SpiritArtLife]

People with adhd can and often do hyperfocus on things they're interested in. So, adhd people can also have trouble quitting and moving on from tasks. It may not be what they need to do at the time, but it is what is holding their interest.

[@YoSamdySam]

This video (especially the part about small talk) give me further confirmation that I have parts of me that cannot be explained by autism alone. I watch most KZbin videos on 1.5x speed, which apparently is common to adhders. The constant feeling of boredom sometimes can be agonising. Thanks for making this.

[@spiralcat6376]

You can do that? :o Sweet

[@DjPrespley]

1.5x speed makes anyone sound like Ben Shapiro

[@Call-me-Al]

I watch most on 2x unless it is someone who already speaks fast, or it needs to be in 1x speed for max effect, like acting or music.

[@daynataylor8609]

I didn't know this was possible!! THANK YOU

[@pepsyboo]

woah, I literally watched one of YOUR VIDEOS on 2x speed yesterday!! I watch all non-music videos on high-speed.

[@askingaliicja]

Girls/women (I noticed with myself and from conversations with other women with AD(H)D) with ADHD also have the same problem when it comes to masking: behave and do everything as 'normal as possible' and then have a bigbigbig CRASH at the end of the day, or during the day when no one is watching. You get a lot and I mean A LOT of stimulation from surroundings (and just everything that is going on in your head) which you can't really filter. BUT you use all of your energy to try and filter it and not let people know you're actually distracted and not listening to them anymore. And then you get moments where you think, because of that, omg I am so bad at communicating and it takes so much energy, that I just don't want to communicate at all because what if people notice I get distracted, then think I am not interested in them and then they won't like me. Or worse, if you're a professional and have professional conversations and get distracted. WOW. And then you spend days overthinking that, consuming a lot of energy there. And even years later you might think back of that moment because you experience something similair. Being afraid they might think you're not professional. Problem with girls/women is that, as with autism, girls can really do the 'mimicking' part well. It's not a natural way to behave like others. You already notice that from a really young age. But we mimic, therefore not being diagnosed (or really late) and learning all the kinds of strategies to mask what's going on. But later in life ending up more f*cked than men, because they got diagnosed earlier therefore learning good strategies from professionals that women learn when they're adults after being diagnosed.

[@gnedsu]

Yes INDEED Girl!👏🏾

[@chrisrohr7066]

This is deeply relatable. 💜

[@minnomaters]

This was EXACTLY my experience pre-diagnoses. I would literally fall on the couch and pass out when getting home in high school, but that whole day I acted the model student. It was to the point where teachers genuinely didn't understand why I was doing badly grade wise in their classes when I was constantly engaged in class (because it was the only way I could funnel my lack of impulse control) and they told me "if only you tried a little harder", which was very hurtful at the time.

[@johanna9612]

@@minnomaters i feel so understood right now... it's the same for me evey day in school. Apparently I'm pretty intelligent so i should be able to get good grades but it's the complete opposite. Most of my teachers think i'm just lazy and don't care about school while I'm trying so hard to do my best! I'm exhausteed after school, I hate going outside it just takes too much energy and sometimes even a normal day is too much to handle. The worst thing is, nobody understands or even tries to understand. "Do better, try harder" is the dumbest thing i heard in my life and i know the pain of being told that so well... I hope you find something you genuinly enjoy doing so it gets better at work. Know that at least your adhd peers understand what you're going through and are proud of everything you've done so far! And if you don't know Jess from How to ADHD, check her out she's more helpful than therapie and medication for me and is just an angel! (Sorry for any mistakes, english is my 2nd language :)

[@BananaP1zza]

Does anyone else just disappear to recharge? Or even have periods of heavy socialisation followed by periods of minimal social contact? Or get SO damn bored and/uncomfortable that you will use ANYTHING as a distraction (ie. impulsivity), even if it goes against your logic/instincts?

[@ambergardener9114]

I feel like ADHD should be AIERD (attention, impulsiveness, emotional regulation disorder) then it would cover hyperactivity, stimming, being distracted AND being hyperfocused, meltdowns, problems with decision making, rsd, emotional outburst (positive or negative), and more

[@covellin_]

We need to make it to WEIRD because thats how I feel in life

[@robertraymond762]

Noo! ADHD should be relabeled as NTSHEF,INO?D.BA,FT.U (Nothing To See Here Folks, I'm Normal, Ok? Disorder. But Also, Fuck This. Ugh). They should call it NTSHEF,INO?D, instead of ADHD.

[@covellin_]

@@robertraymond762 shorten it to "Ugh" and I'm in

[@MonerLaine]

I call it Attention Filter Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder. Because that's what i lack, a filter for my enormous attention

[@laurab6165]

If that were the case I feel like many people with ADHD & BPD would have the borderline diagnosis thrown out all together.

[@canwejustnot]

I have ADHD, to me homework (for the subjects that I liked) was way more fun than running around. I loved learning new things in the structured way of homework, but once I understood it, I grew bored super quickly from having to repeat it to remember it long term.

[@mrj3217]

I am like this with careers and people at times. Once I get good at everything at a job I avoid management because I don't get to work with my hands much and I do t like doing that.

[@nuynobi]

I have ADHD and I am an avid learner and did very well in school as a result. I just love learning new stuff. But I'm not always learning something useful. Now, as an adult with a smartphone, a lot of my hyper focus moments involve going down rabbit holes on wikis--usually but not always Wikipedia--to the point where I can't even remember what it was I originally looked up. Maybe I looked up an actor in the movie I just watched to see what else they've been in, and then 3 hours later I'm reading about gangrene or the history of cowboy hats, or Sufism or the cosmology of Middle Earth. I probably forget about 90% of what I read, but I read so much that I still end up with a basic understanding of a huge variety of topics. The fiddly details tend to get forgotten while the broad principles stick.

[@nonenone-gg7sm]

​@@nuynobi same for me buddy, I'm an avid learner and I have ADHD. It sucks, especially when you have to prepare that power point for your job meeting but you are too focused in learning analytic geometry only too get bored of it after a week and start researching how do clams reproduce. But hey, at least I have a little bit of knowledge of everything

[@anastunya]

Some of the new home schools or “micro schools” are designed for ADHD. The Covid pandemic was a curse that brought blessings for many. Parents finally started paying attention to what a disaster our schools are.

[@anastunya]

@@nuynobi Me too! As a child, I probably read the entire World Book Encyclopedia, going from one article to a related article. I know a little bit about a wide variety of subjects, but could never sit down for months to write a thesis on one subject.

[@SageH-xl8iu]

One of my therapists recommended me the book "Smart but Stuck". It's about teens and adults with ADHD and it's really helpful because it actually mentions the emotional consequences of ADHD. Like for me, having my shame for not being able to do things I don't want to validated almost made me cry.

[@derickzon3347]

Terapy and psycologi and all does tings feel very exploititive at times but maybe you should ask yourself is it working or is it traing to Hurt you in some way or on purpuse be carful with watever dei tell you dads all

[@braylenlandkey]

You no longer need other people's validation, we are now able to self-validate with DBT skills, Cheers & God bless kzbin.info/www/bejne/ravYh2alo7N3rMU&ab_channel=InnerRenovations psychcentral.com/blog/imperfect/2019/11/why-its-so-important-to-validate-yourself-and-how-to-start

[@feth7747]

Its NOT smart and stuck, its smart but LIED, but some INGIGOS, are enought smart to not fall in the trap. ADHD is A FRAUD to hidden the INDIGO CHILDS. ADHD is the unique mind against BS the world has told everyone to listen, follow, and obey.

[@Idk20061]

almost? I cry all the time thinking a bit more deeply about all the things that I want to do but find hard to find the drive and motivation to do it

[@anthommflu4946]

@@Idk20061 hello, don’t know if you’ve already watched them but I highly recommend contents on the channel How to ADHD, for me those knowledge and techniques are really really helpful. Sometimes just listen to her speaking can help me recognize where exactly lies the problem and get rid of the constant feeling of shame and chaos.

[@elizabeth9841]

I always thought the experience of getting tunnel vision on a single task was just me. I often can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about how I'd approach a project and I just have to get up and do it, I have heaps of abandoned projects because they stopped being interesting to me in the moment. I guess the plus side is when I do end up fixated on something I need to do, like tidying, I can do it for hours and will end up going completely overboard and reorganizing everything

[@joeminella5315]

lol "Heaps of abandoned projects". Yup Yup!

[@retroman7331]

Can I ask a question? My twin brother has been diagnosed as a kid as having ADD. So I'm wondering does he has autism. I live in another country than him. He will ignore all my messages to him (as well as others). Then, every year or every six months...for about a week or two weeks he will contact me daily and spend hours on the phone with me. We don't talk about our lives much. We have to keep the conversation on topics he's interested in, baseball, politics, combat sports, tv shows/movies. Then, after about a week, he will no longer talk to me. Just completely stop answer my calls, no longer replying to my messages. I can try again in a month, and no replies. I just have to wait till he is in the mood to talk to me, which is about every 6 months or a year. Is this a symptom of autism? Where you care about someone for a few weeks out of the year then completely stop talking to them?

[@Beetletreuse]

I get random ideas sometimes that I just have to get up and write down or do because if I don't I will forget them in a matter of minutes... or sometimes I forget them before I've even got up and found a pen to write it down

[@Beetletreuse]

@@retroman7331 There's this thing called out of sight/out of mind.... where people with ADHD can sometimes forget people exist.... also I have a friend with Autism and we went over a year without speaking and I called her once a few months ago... talked for a couple hours... she said I could call her more often... yet she has not once called me since or before that even though she likes my posts on social media and such. I think it has to do with getting caught up in stuff and just forgetting to get back to people that you've been in contact with. Even with my own sister I will go days and days and days without talking to her, even forgetting to check my messages, or I'll look at something she sent me and forget to reply until days later. I haven't been diagnosed with either ADHD or autism.... but definitely have gone long periods of time avoiding talking to people.... while at the same time forgetting certain people exist unless randomly triggered by a memory

[@themelonsoup]

Absolutely relate to this

[@brandonmcalpin9228]

“You’re probably not even watching anymore” I felt that. Idk why but I did

[@daniyalmalikmehboob7476]

Yes me too and I'm going to the comments

[@courtneyyoung9758]

Same

[@Alucardtube636]

Haha same here,

[@APieceofT-BoneSteak]

I went into the comments before I even got to that part.

[@mudskipper2842]

i didnt even here him say that o_o

[@ohkaygoplay]

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and underlying autism at 41. It's both nice to finally have an answer as to why life has been so hard just to be normal, how I'm terrible in social situations, and anger-inducing to think about how my life could have been had I - a girl with inattentive ADHD with hyperactivity and autism - went under the radar. I was the normal kid. A life of frustration at people not understanding how hard it is to try, to work to be normal, and to do things I don't find interesting makes me cry. I've had meltdowns over the stupidest stuff that wasn't even about that thing, but was built up frustrations and emotions, and trying so hard to be normal that I crack.

[@feth7747]

ADHD is A FRAUD to hidden the INDIGO CHILDS. ADHD is the unique mind against BS the world has told everyone to listen, follow, and obey.

[@JesusChrist-Gives-Eternal-Life]

Oh my gosh, I am 41 and this sounds exactly like me. Our generation really didn't have autism or it went under the radar. I just figured I was extremely introverted, and we are known to be awkward in social situations, and I am literally one of the worst I have ever seen. I am DREADING my husband's family's Christmas event next week because I am ALWAYS the weirdo and they are all so loud and extroverted and they mock me in really subtle ways. But I always felt that there is more going on than just introversion since I am pretty severe and always have been. Your comment may be my answer as well. God bless you.

[@jasperdraca]

I'm 35 and realized I am autistic about a year ago. Your comment about how your life has been hit hard. My folks raised me to be polite - good manners cost nothing after all. It was SO hard to learn what was polite and what was not and I felt stupid for not getting it when so many other got it so easily. So when people are rude, I either refuse to engage with some one so lazy and uncaring or flip my shit at the nasty piece of work. Not really anything in between.... Finding out about being autistic made it both worse and better - some behaviors I'm much more lenient to (like not making eye contact or speaking clearly), and less tolerant of others (like certain tones of voice or snatching things out of my hand).

[@objectivityisourfriend9631]

With you at 45. Well, I got the ADHD Dx at 26 and ASD at 44. Better late than never, but I agree it can be infuriating.

[@bridgetherrington8074]

Where did you go for a diagnosis? The center, here where I am, has declined an interview 3 times and has referred me to Psychiatry 3 times. It's so disheartening. I'm 44 and have intuitively known that I am on the spectrum for about 5 years, now. So, 5 years ago, I discovered that I wasn't defective but that I just needed different tools.

[@LG123ABC]

I was diagnosed with ADD (ADHD without the hyperactivity) as an adult. I'm glad you mentioned the ability to hyper-focus. A lot of people seem to think that someone with ADHD is unable to focus on anything but, with me, it tended to be an "all or nothing" kind of thing. I remember an incident many years ago when I started working on a project in my garage one Saturday morning that completely captured my attention. I remember my wife would occasionally check on me but I really didn't give her that much notice. When I finally decided that I was tired and needed a break -- after what I thought had a been a few hours -- I gradually realized that it was now Sunday morning. I had worked all day Saturday and all through Saturday night without noticing the passage of time.

[@anonymousaccount8941]

I can absolutely relate to that

[@LiaMenaker]

omg my life story - thanks for sharing

[@AggroPhene]

interesting that you noticed hyper-focus, as a symptom of your diagnoses, that is missing the hyperactive monicker.

[@deeperthings]

So, being completely disconnected from the real world experience of time passing while working on something that has captured your interest, is that a symptom of ADD, being on the spectrum, or both?

[@eds6569]

As a fellow ADHD member I completely understand. For one example me and my little brother once stayed up all night until the sun came up the next morning manually turning the dial on an old mechanical tally counter just to see what happened after the dial passed 9999 (he's probably somewhere on the ADD spectrum as well). Hyper-focus has caused a load of problems for me in my life (especially in my marriage) without realizing it because once I find things that stimulate my mind nothing else matters (especially time.) If only I could hyper-focus on things that are important but suck doing... I know the end result is awesome if I push through all the uncomfortable and/or boring crap but that's only one big brain meal vs lots of little bites of dopamine goodness to keep me going until I get the end result when I'm doing something I truly enjoy (even though most ppl around me think it's dumb/pointless/a waste of time/ect...)

[@leftlane5085]

i didn’t take my second dose of adhd medicine today (first time i’ve missed a dose on a while) and i’m back to pushing off getting in the shower by laying down on the end of my bed (over the comforter) watching youtube videos rewinding every 20 seconds and then leaving the video halfway through to do the same thing with another video. now i rly have to go shower

[@leafface5890]

Oh god that’s a mood

[@LitsaPizza]

You perfectly described how my day went today

[@SheepWaveMeByeBye]

Internet addiction?

[@leftlane5085]

@@LitsaPizza it's nice to be reminded that others share my struggles

[@leftlane5085]

@@SheepWaveMeByeBye i mean that's a pretty vague term. i am definitely on the internet a lot because it is easy to find stimulation there compared to "the real world" where i rarely have people around me that have the same interests as me edit: and i also get rly anxious irl and im a bit awkward

[@marcoaziel]

The way you look around at your thoughts as you explain them, like they exist in physical space around you, is incredibly relatable

[@ErikaEmody]

Same

[@itmustbecomeasun]

"like they exist in physical space around you", are you implying my thoughts aren't there? 😱

[@doctordark3527]

Get off KZbin

[@rvc731]

Is this autism or adhd?

[@TheLegitSounds]

@@itmustbecomeasun They're projected onto a visual overlay on top of what we see. Especially if you have ADHD w/ Autism and Dyslexia.

[@lezbeehonest0294]

As someone who suspects to be on both spectrums, I love the "hyperdistraction" vs "hyperfocus" distinction. I have hyperfocuses--things which I will latch on to and get hooked on for years (like playing specific video games to completion, listening to specific music and memorizing all the lyrics, rewatching specific movies), but which do not necessarily _take_ my time, I just _decide_ to keep doing them and not focus on other things like bodily needs. But I also have hyperdistractions--small interests that actively take over my attention system for a full day or for hours straight and I _forget_ to eat, sleep, or drink water--like going down rabbit holes, learning new skills, projects around the house, etc. I suspect you are right that the prior comes from the ASD, and the latter from the ADHD, as one brings a steady stream of comfort/self-soothing and the other brings sudden troves of stimulation and dopamine.

[@feth7747]

ADHD is A FRAUD to hidden the INDIGO CHILDS. ADHD is the unique mind against BS the world has told everyone to listen, follow, and obey.

[@lezbeehonest0294]

@@chrysalis4126 yeah I was more so trying to differentiate WHY I get hyper focused and how that probably signifies which disorder is driving it. ADHD is stimulation and ASD is comfort/routine.

[@SeldomBucket]

Oh holy shit. That makes so much sense.

[@jumperontheline]

​@@lezbeehonest0294I'm not diagnosed with anything, except OCD years ago, but I know that I definitely have dyspraxia. I was very confused listening to this video. You have explained it in a simple, clear way that my brain can understand. Comfort vs stimulation. Thank you! 💞

[@bevrolee8887]

“You’re probably not watching anymore.” After watching another video of yours and realizing that I’ve never heard anyone else voice what I’ve felt my whole life... I recognize your anxiety, and appreciate that you’re still making this video. Thank you.

[@tyhayes2098]

I'm currently undiagnosed but researched this topic due to recent realizations that I clearly have something. I absolutely agree with your comment though. When I heard him say "you're probably not watching anymore", I absolutely felt that. Also, is it just me, or does anyone who has one, the other or both seem to absolutely obsess about how others feel about interaction with them. I avoid interactions because I overtalk, over-explain, and overtime EVERYTHING. My wife clued me in on this.

[@maryellenholtzman6943]

Me to

[@elainefernandez9324]

I laughed so hard when he said "You're probably not watching anymore" because I had, indeed, drifted off to other things and was scrolling through other tabs at the time. Great video.

[@kurbverobel2112]

ADHD: I found how to do boring things, when I do 2 things at the same time, I can do everything. Watching tv while drawing, singing/dancing while cleaning.

[@RachelAmmons]

yeah doing two things at once can help. Doodling in class always helped me absorb information... Sometimes I get to the point I can’t even focus on a show I like... so I end up watching something on iPhone at the same time as iPad 😂 two different shows at once

[@kurbverobel2112]

@@RachelAmmons Haha! Totally, also when real live show was still a thing I use to lost myself in the music gear the musicians were using. But hey! It's okay. Cuz we are made to be warrior in forest aware of every little movements!

[@maddyc8695]

surprisingly this is true for me too, I can write essays while singing a song and listening to music 😂

[@EmilyKnight413]

Yessss!!!!

[@EmilyKnight413]

I also found in college that handwriting my notes, not typing, and then re-writing those notes over and over while reading them put loud really helped. I also used to need loud music to fall asleep. Have had a solid stimulant medication for about 20 years now and still struggle with the guilt of being told I was unmotivated or had no ambition as a school child.

[@OrthodoxChristian809]

I have both. I feel that my adhd causes me problems, whereas the autism doesn't cause me many functional difficulties, but only social ones. My adhd traits irritate me a lot and totally hold me back. I can't study or even read a newspaper article through. I can't sit still and am easily distracted. My mind is a jumble of thoughts and ideas which fly around, but never settle. If I don't feel interested in doing something I just cannot do it and I procrastinate all the time. My brain is so annoying 😖

[@ed-up]

You describe my issues well. I am 42 and have just been referred for ADHD and autism. My autism i can live with, even enjoy at times. My ADHD has held me back from my full potential and caused big problems in my career, relationships, my mental health, and my physical health.

[@typhaneic]

Yep. I’m ADHD, a female, with severe hyperactivity all my life too. My mom taught me to love school, writing/reading etc. Or I would have fallen so far behind....it’s very difficult to start but I can change all over the place-in fact I guess I’ve made peace with it bc now I feel expert at social norms-I can always “pass” as normal bc I’m assessing ppl & their lies (to me/about themselves in gen) the whole time...I guess this is how socialization has become so stimulating; it’s never been an issue for me,, I’m always one of the loudest most popular in class even though “weird” or a little “off”. I also have BiPolar so that extremism is terrible-I’m always like ALL or Not

[@HaseoXth]

I'm guessing y'all also have really bad problems with sleep?

[@SS24ist]

@@ed-up same thing here. I was literally paralyzed with ADD inaction/procrastination and depression today. I was absolutely exhausted when my son went to bed because it took all of my energy to appear close to normal for him. But now I'm spending time on KZbin when I should be sleeping (of course! 🤦‍♀️)

[@elizabethbennet4791]

YES

[@CyberHak]

I love the way you were a little overwhelmed at the start, and then completely smashed it by producing an amazing insight into the idiosyncrasies of two similar conditions, that also have many differences; you explained far better than any other "so called" expert who never lived with the challenges they're trying to describe. 43k likes is certainly a fair reward for your great work. Very useful indeed. Thanks.

[@gnedsu]

I know what I want to do. I know what I need to do. I just CAN'T MAKE MYSELF DO IT!!!🙌🏾🤦🏾‍♀️😫

[@mintybirdy3850]

I RELATE SO HAAAAAAARD! 😤😖😥🥺

[@larswillems9886]

I was busy with homework until KZbin bacame more interesting.

[@kille-4B]

Me too 🤗

[@enoch4499]

24 years of being undiagnosed, the ONLY person in my life to accept the REAL me is my husband. Bless his heart. I don't think I would have diagnosed Asperger's if I didn't have him. Starting to think I have both but for now I'm educating myself on Asperger's first. Thanks for your work.

[@yetanotherretroreview4476]

Don't think they call it aspergers anymore...you fronting?

[@nesy5041]

Don't use the word Asperger's please. It's ASD / Autism.

[@rantersparadise]

@@nesy5041 No people do.

[@rantersparadise]

@@yetanotherretroreview4476 I do. Stop policing ppl.

[@thelastmotel]

@@yetanotherretroreview4476 Asperger's hasn't been a diagnosis in the US since 2013, and the rest of the world dropped it as a diagnosis between 2020 and January of this year (varying by region). It is important for people to understand and accept that Asperger's is no longer a diagnosis anywhere in the world anymore.

[@CoolBeans962]

Sensory processing issues, masking, crashing at the end of the day, hyperfocus, and difficulty with transitions are all things people with ADHD can experience too. The experience you described of waking up the next day still thinking about something from the night before can happen with ADHD too. I like the example where a person with autism would not understand the purpose of small talk, whereas a person with ADHD would have trouble focusing on it.

[@TheMarcusQuin]

Thank-you for stating this! ADHD is potentially more misunderstood because the symptoms are so commonly bandied-around by those that only take a casual interest or possess a ‘weekend workshop’ skill set and understanding. It is because of the easily digestible ‘key take-away’ points about ADHD that people mostly associate ADHD with observable behaviours, such a deviations from neuro-typical peoples’ abilities to easily transition between tasks and popular assumptions of why someone with ADHD act the way they do. Understanding the underlying motivators of these observable behaviours for all types of ADHD (attentive type, inattentive type, combination attentive/inattentive type) not to mention common male vs common female attributes of ADHD is very difficult, even with those with ADHD trying to ‘get’ why they act in certain ways or can’t complete seemingly ‘simple tasks’. An interest-based nervous system drives those with ADHD to seek out what they want to do or need (this is why some kids exhibit the commonly associated behaviour of ‘bouncing off the walls’ while others appear to day-dream and don’t readily respond when called upon). As you stated, people with ADHD do hyper-fixate on their need or interest (physical, sensorial or intellectual), but struggle greatly with the expectations to switch tasks quickly and on a regular basis (such as school schedules). Hence the masking, end of day crash and emotional and inter-personal dysregulqtion that are commonly experienced by people with ADHD, but is not commonly understood or even referenced in medical materials such as the DSM. Throw common executive function deficits into the mix, and things go quickly south almost on a daily basis for people with ADHD that are unmedicated or not diagnosed. Accepting the common overlaps both condition share will do more towards a better understanding of both ASD and ADHD than drawing lines in the sand determining which condition has explicit ownership of which characteristics.

[@Hellraiser988]

Yeah I always find small talk boring I love getting to the root of thing so anything I say just isn't explained great and some may say in a dick way but also straight to the point because I just feel small talk is going in circles

[@robosing225]

@@TheMarcusQuin Astute analysis. I have to say, if everyone here is identifying with ADHD/ADD and ASD neruotypes, how does a person act who is neurotypical? Basically, how "normal" is normal? It seems ADHD and ASD's spectrum is so broad, that common things like anxiety, stress, anti-social behavior, inattentiveness, hyper-attentiveness, etc., all bleed into each other while also being apart of a neurotypical person's mindset. For example, neurotypical people experience stress and anxiety too. Perhaps their work space isn't completely organized, or perhaps they exhibit introverted personally types too, yet they don't have adhd or asd. What's your thoughts on this?

[@hossap3067]

I just need to say this video is amazing, it has a very neurodivergent friendly atmosphere in contrast to other videos on these topics, and you have a very likable and amazing amount of honesty. I just wanted to say thank you.

[@peachshoes3793]

bouncing the ball amused me.

[@XeLYoutube]

+1 friendly , positive nihilsim! 'how to min max our autism even if everyone die inside 120 years of experiencing being alive"

[@gmamapetey44]

I love the authenticity of this human as well. I feel comfortable and safe watching.

[@siemlybi]

All the comments about ADHD peeps are like "I stopped paying attention to the video because I was reading the comments" and I'm like wow maybe I'm not actually ADHD and then I was like wait I'm literally doing the dishes while baking muffins while also watching

[@paulmadreddog282]

Or is that abandoning part-washed dishes whilst burning the muffins and partly watching whilst realising you must've left the keys in the lock again and deciding to redecorate and skipping back on the same part four times bc attention...?

[@Margatatials]

"No one can see how hard you are trying" that hit like a tonne of bricks, I can remember crying as a little kid because other children received merit awards for trying hard in xyz subject and I never did even though I always tried hard in everything.

[@ChrisDragon531]

Same! I also have three younger siblings (Neurotypical) and when they were always getting those good grades and awards I would also cry (and feel a bit jealous, because I didn't understand why my hard work wasn't paying off like my siblings' were)

[@MasiukA]

Both for me. Autism seems to govern me at the macro level, and ADHD at the micro level. So let's say, I can sit at the piano (special interest) and mess around for 3 hours and not get bored (macro), yet, as I do that, I can't seem to stay playing the same thing for very long (ADHD). Sometimes mid-song I will just switch to something else, or get lost messing around with the sound patches, or fixate on random details and forget the purpose of why I sat down at the piano in the first place. Stand-alone autism would be more start-to-finish task completion in a more anticipated set of steps, whereas I tend to have no particular order. With that said, I also thrive on order, at the macro level, and indeed plan my life rather meticulously. So again, it is macro and micro levels. Few people have talked about this as I have but I find more and more people agreeing this is their experience as well when they are diagnosed autistic and ADHD. My psychologist agreed as well.

[@Devil4D]

Interesting viewpoint on micro vs macro, ADHD vs Autism. I can feel similar when I use my computer, hyper focus on the general task (using the computer), and the ADHD part that result in many many tabs and diffrent projects active at the same time. Just a thought... When you play a song on the piano and you feel the urge to "move on"... Maby just "go with the flow" and play the next song that comes to mind, like a medley! Could result in some cool music and maby help to keep your focus. As I said, just a thought that popped in to my head, maby you have already tried it or you find the idea silly. Anyway, peace out! :]

[@chairninja]

How did you get assessed and diagnosed with both? I just got diagnosed with ADHD but suspect I also have ASD as well. My Therapist and the Psych I see for my ADHD don't seem interested in looking at it. Therapist just says "oh that's also ADHD" whenever I bring up something that might be ASD (but almost all of ASD and ADHD symptoms overlap???). And I discussed it with my Psych but they haven't explored it at all. I feel like I am now firmly in the ADHD box and getting anyone to look at the possibility of ASD as well is going to be equivalent to a sprint up Everest :( :(. I have tried looking for specialists who assess both ASD and ADHD but I can't find any. Any suggestions would be incredibly appreciated, I'm out of ideas.

[@MasiukA]

@@chairninja There are many similarities, yes, but also very substantial differences. I would look for characteristics of autism (out of the book, DSM-5), that are not part of the ADHD spectrum, for example difficulty in understanding neurotypical forms of non-verbal communication, relationships, etc, or some of the Criterion B components, such as adherence to routine, special interests, sensory sensitivity, stimming behaviours, etc, but more importantly, how/why those characteristics apply. For ADHD and autism, when the traits are similar, they are often similar but occur for different reasons. For example, stimming behaviours for ADHD might be just excess energy or restlessness, whereas for autism it is a soothing or sensory coping mechanism that aids in thought processing. As for myself, I got the Autism diagnosis first, and my psychologist suggested going for an ADHD assessment as well since there were clearly signs of both. A went to an ADHD specialist for that, who was a different psychologist than the one for my autism diagnosis.

[@MasiukA]

@@Devil4D Yeah the computer example applies to me ALL the time. It's hard to stick to one task on the computer but I can sit at my computer all day if I wanted to. With the piano, I do tend to switch songs frequently, or go off on tangents as I'm playing. Sometimes I arrive back where I was before, or sometimes new stuff comes out, and that's how I end up composing new material. But it can also be a hinderance when I need to complete a task in practicing or composing.

[@Duncanmn]

I was diagnosed with Aspergers (ASD) as a young teen and struggle a lot with executive function issues. I struggle with impulsiveness and attention issues to the point where I think I probably also have ADHD. As a musician (clarinetist), I 100% relate to the way you describe your practice sessions. Mine are the same. Hoping to stat therapy soon!

[@aacotyaa]

I have ADHD, and what you described with how hyperfocusing works with you is actually exactly how it works with me. I have a very hard time with multitasking, but I can't get really focus in on a particular project almost to the point that it becomes obsessive, and then all my other responsibilities get put aside and neglected until I eventually completely burn out on the thing that had my attention.

[@whattup2704]

Diagnosed with ADHD at 29 and think I might also have autism. Pretty sure both run in the family. Everyone always thought I was "normal" because I have done well in school and at work. They don't know how much energy it costs me to be like them and how misunderstood I feel. It makes me sad :(

[@enearu599]

Same. I was good in school too and now I am struggling a bit but my family thinks I am just making up these things because of internet

[@JD-zh5nv]

But it's a dry sadness

[@katarinatill4713]

❤

[@teclinsoro4523]

i’m so glad this video has subtitles. i’m not hearing impaired (that i know of) but i find subtitles help me focus on videos and better process everything

[@Gonglette]

Same! I've always got them on at home as well!

[@pollystyrene99]

me too. I put them on the TV too

[@nicoleowens2318]

Wow I thought it was just me! It drives my daughter nuts but it's often the only way I can process what's happening and/or being said. I have to rewind things a lot too, sometimes many times, or even lower the speed on videos to understand them

[@kristinludlowUX]

This is actually a pretty common reaction to subtitles. Many design considerations originally made for people with disabilities become commonplace for "abled" people once they realize it makes their lives better. Many people with full hearing capabilities enjoy subtitles. Other examples of design for the "disabled" that become daily occurrences are sidewalk cuts for wheelchairs that end up being used by anyone with buggies, bikes or feet - while something as obscure as keyboard tabbing index for the low-vision people become boons for power users (like coders). Inclusive design and engineering practices become adopted by everyone at some point.

[@rahbeeuh]

Same. I tend to block it out if I don't have subtitles.

[@Luhnomic]

The part where he said w aspergers u lack the motivation to start task but when u do it’s hard to stop is the most relatable thing I’ve ever heard in my love

[@Luhnomic]

Life

[@wastelanderone]

it's also super ADHD, can I start no not really but also I have started to unpack the boxes I moved in with 10 months ago AND YOU CANNOT STOP ME

[@SaltyBeach333]

I am SO grateful for this!!! I am 48 years young, a caregiver to my mother, a 3x college student, and full time employee. I have been diagnosed with ADHD but, the therapy in my area is awful. I have worked with autistic humans and have many many autistic friends and have always known that I am on the spectrum (I think my mother is as well.) I cried when you talked about masking and the crash because this has been my WHOLE life and people label me as anti social because I just can't regulate after masking all day, everyday, always. I'm tired. I'm tired of "failing" at things because the communication is rigid. Thank you for understanding. I wish you so much abundance.

[@samiryan214]

Are we young in 48 years of age?

[@heyitsfranklynn168]

As an ADHD, i feel so disrespectful when im so mind bendingly board by small talk.

[@ritasjourney]

I've always been kind of proud of myself for not liking small talk. Buuuut I suppose it's better if I can try to do it sometimes. When it suits me.

[@Drakeblood97]

If you're board, why don't you try planking?

[@dannialcardillo623]

@@Drakeblood97 lmao don't poke fun 🤣

[@jay.2512]

your grammar is ticking me off

[@AImighty_Loaf]

Same. But i have depression right now so badly that i can't even talk to people period

[@LadyKris3345]

I was diagnosed with Social Anxiey and ADD as an adult. I thought this explained everything. The doctor kept asking me what are you afraid of? People's opinions? No I told the doctor. I fell unsafe in a hostile world. And this video just made me cry because my doctor didn't get it and I didn't get it. And now I think I'm starting to and I'm scared.

[@rawrxd7870]

hru today?

[@thesalazar7328]

ADD and social anxiety gang 🙂. I am anxious around people, bc I got no idea of what the fuck I should do

[@M13C7]

I really do relate to this. I was in for social anxiety and general anxiety ( behavioural therapy ) and my therapist would keep asking me the same question, like what thoughts are you having, what worries are you having. And i kept explaining that i just feel anxious and unsafe, and exhausted. I dont actively think about anything, it is just a feeling of "better get out of here, better hide under a table, or in a dark corner" like my brain is wired like a rat that seeks corners.

[@MetaDecker]

I was Dx'd with ADHD when I was a kid and struggled too with social situations and basic functioning that others found easy. I'm 35 now, and as I've gotten a little older, life has gotten a bit easier. Also, my doctor prescribed me beta blockers and about 90% of my problems went away, lol... As far as doctors go, I'm VERY picky. I have some trust issues with doctors, but I found a good one who understands and has helped me tremendously. You owe it to yourself to find a good doctor who can really help you. I hope all is well and wish you the best

[@constanceweinberger3078]

PTSD can be a cause of these symptoms also; worth taking a look at .

[@skyllarrk]

With my ADHD, I struggle with both the “forcing myself to do the thing I know I need to do” AND putting on that “mask” , not just one. I both suppress my impulsive behavior while also struggling to get my tasks done due to my inattentive symptoms.

[@AlexSmith-np3sm]

Very well put from someone with adhd. that’s literally it I’m the same way.

[@seltra1328]

Hi! I'm a psychology student and I have to congratulate you on your explanation and examples. It was very clear and interesting. Thanks for sharing!

[@hannajung7512]

I just got my ADHD diagnosis, at the age of 38. From my experience there can be a crash or meltdown for ADHD people, too. Paying attention, trying to make sure you do not forget to notoce the needs of others when you are “in the flow“ or just focusing at a necessary task, while there is a lot going on around you can be very, very straining. And often I come home after doing groceries and break down crying from exhaustion. Or I totally flip because I tried to build a routine to get something done that I actually hate without forgetting half of the stuff I need to do (like preparing a meal for my disabled partner) and something broke me out of it. And its not that I need the routine, its that if I do not have one I mess this task up (having the meal burn), forget completely what I was going to do, and often have to restart again, finding new motivation, often needing to do previous tasks a second time etc.

[@robosing225]

What confuses me with this self-discovery adventure regarding if you may have a disorder or not, is that so many people relate to these disorders. So much so, that I don't even know what "normal" or neurotypical people should act like. I don't see in the comments anyone saying, "Oh this isn't me at all, everything I do is always organized and I never have deviating thoughts or attention." to me, that comes off as pompous even if they're just being honest. I feel the comment section breeds a sort of echo chamber for others to find out what they may have. I feel everyone around me may have some type of spectrum disorder. When I'm certain this is untrue. Technically even highly successful people can have psychotic sociopathic personality types. It seems everyone has something and there is no true "regular" person.

[@alexiswilliamsinc]

Hanna, you describe what I call the come-down. It is so emotional and for so many years I didn’t understand what was “wrong with me.“ It wasn’t until I found creative leaders who shared their come-down experiences that I started to give myself some credit. At that point, though, I still didn’t have a diagnosis. Anyway, I have also felt irritated because a friend stopped by to say hi while I was finally getting some work done on a difficult project. A 5 to 10 minute conversation stopped me for hours afterward from making any progress. I used to hate myself. For the other commenter, your echo chamber sentiment might result from (only) people who find the discussion relevant actually commenting. People who don’t experience or have questions about autism and ADHD probably didn’t watch this video or feel the need to express themselves in the comments. I definitely know of people who don’t have to work hard to motivate themselves and accomplish their goals. You might be tapping into the problem of labeling people as normal when you are right that there isn’t one normal way of being. The term typical is better because it doesn’t imply a desirable or morally superior way of functioning. Not as much, anyway. It’s just what tends to happen, which is also where the term “norm” started. It’s just a statistical likelihood. The video also covers that idea you expressed that the challenges and strengths that might characterize someone with autism or ADHD can also be found in the general population. Even though we don’t use these videos to self-diagnose, we still gain understanding and empathy as a result of exploring these ways of being - even empathy for just ourselves. 💌

[@sloaneglover1026]

@@robosing225 don't confuse a DSM diagnosis with an actual state of being. "Disorders" are just clusters of "symptoms", they tell us nothing about micro or macro social dynamics (universal "normativity" is extremely rare)

[@feth7747]

ADHD is A FRAUD to hidden the INDIGO CHILDS. ADHD is the unique mind against BS the world has told everyone to listen, follow, and obey.

[@bellaluce7088]

@Hanna Jung No matter how many meals you may burn, to me you are a Champion for cooking at all, and I aspire to be like you someday. ❤🏆❤ Cooking is so hard for me I just gave up on it years ago and subsist mostly on frozen food and take-out. In case it's helpful, these two videos by KZbinrs with ADHD have some good cooking tips, including at least one how not to burn things: 1) ADHD Home Hacks - Real-Life Solutions for a Functional Home, by ClutterBug; & 2) How to Feed Yourself When You Have ADHD! - Executive Function Friendly Recipes, by How to ADHD. Friends of mine who cook love the Instant Pot, which is ADHD-friendly because of the relatively fast cooking times, one-pot recipes, and ability to cook things from frozen without having to remember to defrost first. (I bought one years ago, and will hopefully find the will to actually unbox and use it in 2023! #goals < ; - D ) For now my "cooking" is limited to things like microwaved frozen broccoli with Italian dressing (delicious, and there's no spoilage worries with frozen), and pouring pre-washed greens onto a plate and literally biting baby carrots into pieces so I don't have to wash a knife and cutting board. (Not sure you're partner would be pleased with that hack. ; - ) I'd like to try things like the batch cooking approach in Cook Once, Eat All Week, or better yet, batch cooking and freezing individual meals, since even microwaving seems hard sometimes. Only time will tell. lol In the meantime, huge props again to you for actually trying the thing that feels so impossible to me. Wishing you well! ❤

[@JadeStone00]

I enjoyed this video v much, but have a couple of things about ADHD that I want to comment on. First, it's very possible for ADHDers to fixate on a preferred activity for a superhuman amount of time and have trouble transitioning away from that activity. Second, it's also very possible for that preferred activity to be something like reading or studying a preferred subject. In fact, the way women and girls with ADHD are socialized (and the way we internalize that socialization) encourages us to turn inward more than our male peers, which is one reason why we are often un- or mis-diagnosed. I was the kid who sat in a corner of the playground reading every single day, and would regularly get so engrossed in my book that I'd miss the recess bell and my teacher would have to send a classmate to retrieve me. I spent my summers reading encyclopedias (no internet back then, lol), and I usually preferred studying over watching tv. (Unless it was math.) The point is, ADHD is characterized by an inability to regulate attention, but that regulation can take the form of *either* under- or -over regulation (in other words, hypervigilance vs hyperfocus, or, more commonly, both at various times). That's why there are multiple subtypes of ADHD: inattentive, hyperactive, and combined. I agree with you that "attention deficit" and "inattentive" are the worst names possible for the condition, though. It is not a question of having sufficient attention, it's the inability to consciously choose where that attention is directed. Also, re: motivation, I definitely have seen with my son (who has ASD) that 95% of the time, if he's not doing what he's supposed to do, it's because he doesn't understand it. He is extraordinarily compliant when it comes to doing familiar chores, like loading the dishwasher or folding laundry, but if I ask him to, for instance, clean the bathroom (not something he usually does), I have to both give him a checklist of subtasks *and* show him how to complete each one (by which time the bathroom is clean anyway, lol). However, I myself have a hard time, not with motivation, but with overwhelm. I am very motivated to, for instance, clean the living room before my mother-in-law comes over, but if it's particularly messy (as it usually is), I can't decide where to start and get overwhelmed immediately. Fortunately, my husband, being the only person in our house with unimpaired executive function, is really good about coming in and helping me break it down into smaller tasks and prioritize them. My son, in contrast, if asked to "gather up everything that belongs to you in the living room and take it to your bedroom," can do so with surgical precision. Giving my daughter the same instruction (she has *both* ADHD and ASD) will result in a meltdown roughly 285% of the time. (They are really big meltdowns.) If I work alongside her and we tackle one corner of the room, she can sort items into bins that can then be distributed to each family member, but asking her to pull her individual possessions out of a random pile is both confusing (why do I have to do this?) and overwhelming (where do I begin?). Credentials: I'm a 41 YO cis woman, Dx with ADHD at 36, after both of my children (one boy, 15, and one girl, 12) had been Dx with ASD. My daughter was Dx a year ago with a secondary Dx of ADHD. I was also tested for ASD while being evaluated for ADHD, and my psychologist was absolutely certain that I do not have ASD. Also, you can tell that I have ADHD because I started writing this comment ten minutes into the video and had to edit it 3 times o.O Edit: 4 times

[@irascendedkitten7450]

Thank you so much for explaining this. I’m a woman who is very much ADHD but had it assumed that I didn't understand and had ASD later in life. Both times I had the diagnosis forced on me to ’fix me’ and with the ASD no one would listen when I tried to explain that I knew I shouldn't talk too much about things I was into and that I often knew while I was doing it but couldn't resist the compulsion/ temptation to do that. Or didn't clean my room because I lacked the energy to do it but knew how to.

[@sumiray3388]

You are so speaking my language- I spent my entire childhood reading in a corner and still get sucked down the reading wormhole and hyperfocus with books and things like them! (I have combo adhd)

[@raqui9772]

Thanks for clarifying this! I stopped the video in the part where he's describing Aspies ability to fixate vs ADHDers. I was like, wait what he's describing sounds like hyperfocus. ADHDers TOTALLY hyperfocus! So, I agree, it's more about difficulty controlling where our attention is placed. I struggle with reading in both senses. If it's a textbook on a subject I'm not particularly interested in, I'll take forever to get through just a couple pages cause my mind will just wander off or I'll get fidgety and have to get up and do something else then come back and read some more. But, if it's a book I'm interested in (for example anything fiction) I can wear a grove on my couch going through several chapters and not get up until my bladder is about to burst! I often get overwhelmed by everyday chores and it's very frustrating trying to explain to others how I can have difficulty with, what they perceive as, a simple task.

[@anastasia3811]

These examples are pretty much the most helpful thing I've ever read in differentiating ADHD and ASD. Thank you!

[@skycastrum5803]

All of this is part of the reason I checked out the video. I’m autistic, and largely view autism through the tendency to hyperfocus. It’s a common thread in every autistic I’ve met (which isn’t actually a decent number) and seems to explain numerous autistic tendencies. This is very much not an expert explanation, but autistic brains undergo less synaptic pruning. This causes autistics to latch onto trains of thought and can make shifting thought more difficult. Great for working on tasks you find interesting, not so great for all those tiny skills we need in life that are typically seen as a bother even by neurotypicals. It would be easy to differentiate ASD and ADHD if only looking at hyperactive-impulsive. Heck, autism is almost a polar opposite, with one about concentrated focus and the other about “hey look, squirrel!” But, as you stated, there is more to ADHD. Heck, before my diagnosis, I thought I might be inattentive type ADHD. But I suppose the issue with this is similar to a common problem with understanding autism. The symptoms are not the thing itself. What matters is the underlying cause. For autism, many “autistic traits” are actually the result of how autism interacts with other characteristics. It’s why the spectrum is so wide, as wide as the variation between people as a whole. Thanks for helping a bit with coming closer to realizing that cause. I’m still not sure of the difference, but I know autistic focus seems different than ADHD focus.

[@xXxDinEnesteEnexXx]

I was misdiagnosed with aspergers at the age of 12. When I was 21, i got my proper diagnosis: ADHD. It has really messed me up for reasons I was going to explain, but I got distracted by the comments and now I forgot what I was going to write.

[@austinfernando8406]

OMG knew i couldn't be the only one! (except i got *wrongly* diagonsed with aspergers at 13) it's really messed me up too, and after i figured it out that aspergers doesn't fit me i got people saying "you can have both" yes i know but i don't. (also I had like pretty severe depression)

[@julieomalley9442]

Thank you so much for sharing! My daughter's 13 and I don't want to put labels on her unless they are going to be helpful!

[@xXxDinEnesteEnexXx]

@@julieomalley9442 The wrong labels can do way more harm than good!

[@j.kaimori3848]

@@julieomalley9442 the thing is, as most adults who find out feel, there's always labels. If it isn't "autistic", then it's "weird." The best thing about a diagnosis is knowing what to try to work on. Being told people didn't like me made me think of the autistic kid and it destroyed my self esteem because I was trying so hard and he was the only autistic person I knew at the time and he didn't care about assimilating. I crashed really badly until I realised autism was probably the thing and we don't have to use it as an excuse to not try to get along with others.

[@HexIsme]

This is really interesting. I don't have autism or ADHD (Clinical depression and social anxiety in spades though), but I love learning about the different ways people operate and what to expect/how to handle differences. So many people take communication for granted, but it's anything but simple when you really look at it for more than a couple minutes at a time.

[@quirix6980]

im going to hell (i laughed when you said c. depression)

[@katejones2172]

That's me too its very complicated but fascinating at the same time jaded & empty that's me 😭

[@feth7747]

ADHD is A FRAUD to hidden the INDIGO CHILDS. ADHD is the unique mind against BS the world has told everyone to listen, follow, and obey.

[@JxSTICK]

We need more people like you. I really appreciate it if people are interested in a disorder or illness and want to learn about it, but don't even suffer from it

[@ashraftarabishi2319]

If you have social anxiety, you are very likely to be on the neurodevelopmental spectrum. It needs careful look.

[@srich3399]

I have ADHD nd I literally got annoyed when he wasn't starting to tell the differences and similarities and giving intro till 2:46 😂😂😂lol

[@scrogfpv7443]

When I’m “zoned in” I have no interest in anything else. No interest in breaks for meals. Tired but can’t sleep because I’m going over the next steps of my project repeatedly. Looking for every possible failure point 😅

[@wetsox278]

That drives me nuts when I have those night, most nights I fall to sleep with no problems, others I can still be awake when the sun comes up.

[@scrogfpv7443]

@@wetsox278 ya exactly. A lot of times as soon as I realize that it’s gonna be that kind of night, I just get up and go back to work. It’s almost torture laying in bed all night.

[@scrogfpv7443]

And “projects” that keep me up could be something bigger and technical, or it could be that my store doesn’t have my exact brand of noodles. Now I have to play with a new brand. There are millions of ways they could be cooked. I don’t know how to prepare these mystery noodles. So I go over what I did last time that could be changed on my next attempt. So many variations. Too many sometimes.

[@mathilda6763]

I forgot to go use the toilet a few times, as well as drinking/eating or sleep and at this point as soon as I sit down for painting I set an alarm to take a break. I also set alarms for bed times in general and other tasks because I know if I don't and am focusing on painting, I just don't do it. I don't sleep, I don't take good care of myself and in the long run I will feel overwhelmed. Itmight seem rigid and robotic from the outside, but I know that as soon as the routine is gone, I am a mess.😥

[@scrogfpv7443]

@@mathilda6763 yes exactly. Everything is about the routine. My foods are even unchanging. I have worn the same deodorant since childhood.

[@0lexis788]

"OOOO colourful pencils!" basically sums up my ability to be motivated to journal, keep a schedule, or do any physical writing task. I always have many coloured pens and highlighters to make it more fun. I love your channel! I just got diagnosed with ADD a year ago (female, 30 years old). It's been a rough ride but channels like these not only help me understand more, but also help me explain to my friends and family what the heck is going on in my brain.

[@susannairisastarte5192]

When I was an office manager in my early 30s, I color coded everything. Was diagnosed with adult ADD about 10 years later.

[@HappyCheeryChap]

I get frustrated with how underused colours are in software interfaces of every type. They make things so much easier to distinguish at a glance, and help you use muscle memory so much more.

[@sunnysealz3546]

❤️

[@Cleric314]

I think this is one of the best caring and thoughtful comment sections. My younger brother was officially diagnosed with both autism and ADHD. Him and i are extremely similar, like we have the same habits, likes and dislikes and overall think and act the same, but I don't have his adhd tendencies, so it was basically an autism diagnosis by proxy for me if that makes sense. The more i looked into autism and researched it the more i felt like i was reading about myself. I went my whole life not knowing why i felt so different and alien to everyone around me. Thanks to everyone sharing their experiences ❤

[@mogvgb]

When I was diagnosed at 37 with Autism one of the things that made my treating clinical psychologist ask me if I had ever considered Autism was when I complained about people at work asking me about my weekend, which I found HIGHLY invasive and inappropriate that they wanted to monitor my personal time activities. I was in my mid 20's before I worked out that the correct answer to "Where are you from?/Where abouts do you live?" is not answered with full mailing address including postcode. LOL Life makes a LOT more sense to me now.

[@macruz8503]

Mog VGB: How can I get diagnosed? I think i have autism as well but never been diagnosed.

[@mogvgb]

@@macruz8503 Depends a bit on what country you live in. Mine was picked up by the clinical psychologist I was seeing for anxiety.

[@alyssarosexoxo5496]

As someone with adhd, I had had a million different thoughts related to everything you were talking about, and then kept having to bring myself back to listen to this video. Loved it though. We really do have a lot of similarities. My little brother is diagnosed with autism and adhd. And when I spend time with him I can really see the similarities between us, and a few differences, even with the age gap.

[@lordcailx]

It seems there are many cases of ADHD / ASD siblings, including within my personal sphere. My personal theory is that we're all like big globs of multicoloured Neurodiverse playdough and the "experts" are taking their ADHD and ASD cookie cutters and just smashing them into personalities then seeing which one "fits" best and applying that as your "official" label.. what if all our traits on the Human Spectrum were multivariate and some people simply needed extra support with some -- or many -- aspects of their identities at certain times of their life or in certain situations? Just a thought..

[@NenaBhinez]

I'm starting to realize all the "personality quirks" I have are actually signs of Autism. It's been a huge relief that there's an explanation for how I feel in different circumstances-- because I also have always had problems explaining how I'm feeling 😂

[@Homesicktraveler]

Same

[@JD-zh5nv]

So will you get diagnosed or do you feel you already are?

[@Starphixx]

I'm starting to realize the same, but signs of ADHD instead and I share your relief

[@feth7747]

ADHD is A FRAUD to hidden the INDIGO CHILDS. ADHD is the unique mind against BS the world has told everyone to listen, follow, and obey.

[@trina1962]

YES!!!

[@j4km4r]

I'm a diagnosed ADHD and at the end of this video (and others from you) I've gotten pretty sure that I am in the autism spectrum as well. Put on top of that that I am a pattern thinker, and my mode of information flow is text. People telling me stuff on the fly? I'm socially confused, look for the context, get understimulated, am wrongfooted and thinking "leave it in chat!" and likely to forget what they just told me the moment I realize how important it was, all at the same time. Thank you a ton for these videos, they help me adress the half of my issues I so far was on my own with.

[@foreverkenzie2397]

ADHD and hyper focus. Think its been 20minutes but its been 4 hrs

[@coreycox2345]

One way to get a lot done, Forever Kenzie. Or to not do what you intended.

[@Ozzianman]

Bad combination when locked in you room with study project for two months, very difficult to keep leisure and work seperate. Ended up being more and more and more work, less taking care of myself. Worked like... 9 - 10 hours a day, was burned out for 3 months afterwards. One thing is for sure, for the next study project, I am going to keep it those two seperate and designate work time and leisure time.

[@miratarnish6316]

Music does that for me, particularly dance or in procrastination, or the dangerous combo in dance video games. Just 1 more song ends up being like 20.

[@coreycox2345]

@@miratarnish6316 Dancing is good for you, at least.

[@miratarnish6316]

@@coreycox2345 one of the only things that will have me working out for like 2 hour sessions, and learning to dance is a socially useful fixation to have, so it's been pretty handy.

[@jaywincer7029]

Thanks so much for putting this together. Parents like me rely on adults and youths like you because our kids cannot put it into words.

[@Billi_crow]

So great of you to go out of your way to learn about it :) I know I would have appreciated it

[@JinaEzell]

Same.

[@Starmel.Caramel]

*Casually changing sitting positions every 30 seconds in chair*

[@BlueBeluga]

relatable as hell

[@EmilyKnight413]

Covid and zoom really allowed me to see how externally visible my ADHD is. Had no idea how much I move. I don’t fidget so much as this... perpetual motion. Zoom was really tough.

[@fejnikwpuiwdiwauid]

read this just as I kept changing my position for the 7th time in a minute

[@Starmel.Caramel]

@@fejnikwpuiwdiwauid nnnnice

[@dont_harsh_my_mellow]

@@EmilyKnight413 literally for my class I noticed how much I got distracted or how much I would focus on looking at myself and making sure I looked like I was focusing when I wasn’t. 😭

[@iancarter1566]

woah i think ive been misdiagnosed. i was diagnosed for ADHD pretty early on so i figured it was obvious so i never really looked into it. i barely relate at all to the ADHD side, but almost everything about autism sounds a lot more inline with how i understand myself.

[@NoiseDay]

I'm autistic and my sister has adhd. It's definitely muddy, but it's obvious to us that we have different conditions. We both struggle with executive function, but the reasons behind it are different. I'll definitely share this with her and see what she thinks as a non-hyperactive person.

[@dilumabeysundara2955]

My son is 5 years old also have autism could you study with autisam did u go normal school.

[@toriless]

@@dilumabeysundara2955 Some can, some struggle, some can not. What is important is you know the condition exists so you can be aware of the cause and not blame the behavior on other reasons. I would worry less these days. I am sure decades ago they would have been bullied and it could still happen. It really depends more on the school.

[@Rivergirl2878]

20:09 i tried to explain this to my professor who owes me accommodation and she sent me an article "debunking learning styles" to invalidate me. she is supposedly neuro-atypical too.

[@matthewmcree1992]

@@FightingForFacts7074 I think it is. I had an IEP in college for ADHD and I didn't always wanna use it, because I didn't want to "use my learning disability as an excuse", but eventually it came to a point later in college where I was forced to just tell my professors that I have ADHD, am medicated with stimulants, and may need additional time for exams and papers sometimes. My professors were generally really accommodating, but I got lucky. But there are so many horror stories and it's sad. I think it is illegal to ignore an IEP if it's on file with your school. If you have to use that, do it. If you need accomodations, you need them and no one can make you feel bad for needing a little help to get through school.

[@AirashiiTiayou]

I don't disagree with the fact that learning styles (aural/visual/kinesthetic) are, in a way, not accurate. As I'm sure was listed in the article your terrible teacher set you, every human being learns and retains information better the more different types of ways that they learn it. That said, there are still very different approaches to how that can be done and obviously environment can make a big difference in information retention as well. Just because learning styles aren't really valid doesn't mean that you don't need accommodations for neuro-divergent people. Basically what I'm trying to say is that your teacher sending you that article in response to you asking for accommodations is just stupid, because learning styles really have nothing to do with what you are asking from her.

[@whatcanidooo]

I had a teacher who talked multiple times about having ADHD herself, but wouldn't let me listen to music while working on projects

[@rahbeeuh]

@@whatcanidooo that's pretty hypocritical of them

[@WikiAndi172]

The "spinning" in particular is super validating to hear. I was very recently diagnosed (I am 28 now), and I'd always felt like I was crazy or a freak for spinning around. This is actually something I still do (though not very often, and mostly I will pace.) Its nice to finally know I'm not alone in this.

[@redking36]

I don’t know about spinning, but I would pace around in circles outside the chemistry classroom in the morning waiting for the teacher to unlock the door. It’s nice because you never have to turn around so there’s no downtime or break in consistency. It sometimes requires more space than usual pacing though.

[@GiantPetRat]

When I was a kid, we had a large basement with a tireswing and I wore that sucker out. I would spin and spin until I fell down and the ceiling moved. The swings were pretty much the only playground equipment worth investigating. I rocked back and forth in my crib so hard they had to tether it to the wall. Nowadays, my vertigo's increased to the point where I can barely use the swings without getting an immediate headache. But I still rock to music most every day.

[@shadowfox933]

*casually rocks back and forth in the chair for a few minutes before realizing it*

[@anonymousaccount8941]

My recently ADHD diagnosed brother would pace, particularly if he was stressed or thinking about something. I remember he had a cavity in his tooth and he wore a trench in our living room carpet 😂

[@aboomination897]

like a record, baby

[@bethpace6936]

My daughter is autistic with ADHD, and I have ADHD. I always noticed the overlap of symptoms between the two disorders. You did an amazing job describing the difference between the two. Thank you so much.

[@Acceleronics]

Your videos trigger significant emotional releases that I can usually suppress. I was diagnosed last year (at age 65!) with both Autism and ADHD. I spent decades wondering what was wrong with me. You describe quite accurately what my life has been like. My belated advise to those of you who are wondering about yourself or your child: get a diagnosis and get treatment!

[@samueltortellini]

I think that I'm probably autistic and my best friend as a kid had adhd. Heres how our day would play out pretty much all summer [important note, my dad lived in a sort of duplex house with her family] She would find something that she wanted to go do and I would follow along. Just as I would start getting into the activity she would begin getting bored of it and pull me to a new activity. We would go through about 4 activities before she would run out of ideas and go to whichever of our parents were home for a new one. If they were all busy we would go to the neighbor's house and go through the cycle anew with their kids. On occasion she would ask me what I wanted to do but generally she didnt like my ideas because they were things like sort envelopes or make embroidery floss bracelets. I liked things that were highly repetitive and pattern based. She liked things that were fast paced. I got bullied a lot by the kids back at my moms place so having a friend who dragged me along everywhere was awesome to me so even if it was confusing and frustrating to switch tasks so often I generally went along with it.

[@leafface5890]

That’s a cute story

[@courtneyyoung9758]

This reminds me of the movie Up for some reason❤❤❤

[@elizabethbennet4791]

i bet the adhd girl was so friendless and being so often rejected that having a friend who she could pull around into her own world and have him actually respond and submit to her whims meant a great deal to her and was very pleasurable and unique.. i would have KILLED for that as a kid. esp back in the past where i came from where females uusally didnt have any power or respect by males unless they joined forces with groups of girls

[@jenniferrenton2945]

As a teacher, this is such a useful video! I hear so much about the autism/adhd spectrum, and this really illustrates the different experiences of both perspectives.

[@tello-visiongames4464]

transition between things is one of my most difficult struggles as an ADHD combine-type person. Transitioning between activities, emotions, priorities, plans, etc... all give me a lot of grief.

[@DaveTexas]

This is fascinating. I’m on the spectrum but I definitely do not have ADHD. I can do one task for days at a time, but it’s nearly impossible for me to change tasks. Even just listening to music and watching TV; if I’m listening to music and my favorite show comes on, it’s nearly impossible for me to pull myself away from listening to music even though I REALLY want to watch my favorite show. Your example of the 18-month-old asking why the other children don’t talk is also something that hits close to home for me. I taught myself to read when I was three. When it was time for me to start kindergarten, the school recommended that I be put in the second grade instead. My parents felt that I didn’t have the "maturity" to be in second grade - in reality, I had no social skills because I was an undiagnosed autistic - so I started kindergarten with all the other children my age. I didn’t understand why the other children couldn’t read. I didn’t understand why they needed to be TAUGHT how to read. I associated letters with sounds by myself before I even learned the alphabet, so I thought everyone else did, too. It made school excruciatingly boring for me until I got to the third grade and my teacher really started to challenge me with much more difficult work. Then I loved school. I still didn’t understand why the other children couldn’t do complex math or read "grown-up" books.

[@marshwiggleme]

You know, your difference in perspective could potentially be really useful for kids that don't pick up information in the traditional way but might need guidance in learning.

[@Merip1214]

I taught myself to read too! I loved how I'd literally be transported to another world and forget everything else. Couldn't even hear my name being called (let alone remember to eat or drink, but being young I was never left alone too long.) Whenever I did have a long 'session' I'd often feel physically exhausted, as if I'd been so immersed that I had actually been there. (I don't like to watch movies; I often do the same kind of deep-immersion, and either they end too soon, or I just don't like the slightly sticky, slightly exhausted feeling that I get.) My parents often complained how they couldn't stop me from reading at night too. (I had a lamppost shining into my window, and I would climb up and sit on the windowsill) What would they do, empty my bookshelves? 😄 I was reading everything from the teen and adult fantasy and sci-fi library section that I could get my hands on by 11. I ran out of books in the local library at 13/14 and besides getting them to order some in from the main library in London, actually had to start waiting for new ones to be released, it was also at this point I realised that many were just different iterations of the same story.. but I didn't care. They were all wonderful new worlds for me to get lost in.

[@shrub8644]

Is the autistic and ADHD hyperfocus really different at all? I often weel the same that I just block out the real world and immerse myself into a video game and have no grasp of passing of time, and I sometimes even don't want to eat even when I'm hungry

[@ryanburke1656]

I have very similar experiences with my ADHD

[@j3nki541]

I know the feeling of having negative appetite, but being hungry to the point where it hurts. Can help to eat a small snack in that situation.

[@virglibrsaglove]

Once I start something the only way I remember to stop and eat is when my cats insist that they need to eat.

[@toriless]

Over distraction and not the same as the focus he is talking about which is completely different. One needs to by active the other can be very passive as well. Video games vs watching a Ken Burns documentary all at once. They are quite different.

[@brutusthebear9050]

It's hard to tell. Remember, ADHD and ASD are both categorizations of SYMPTOMS. They are not *real* things. Not saying that the symptoms aren't real, but ADHD for instance is not a real thing. It is just our current grouping for a bunch of different symptoms, which overlap with other things as well.

[@Ionic457]

Mannnnnnn!!! I'm 34 and I thought I had ADHD for the past like... 8 ish years cause i connected with so many symptoms! BUT THIS IS REALLY ME and my mind is imploding! thank you for this video! PS: I would see a doctor but I could never afford one in my lifetime... And this is actually more depressing than anything I can think of. Which makes me ridiculously sad. I have no way out of this.... I'm going the doing my best to learn about what I can. I want to navigate the seas of mental health knowing I'm on my own.. I'm excited :) . Can't ever thank you enough for taking the time to produce this

[@MandyMuller-n5l]

You could try looking into important supportive things like nutrition, omega oils, foods rich in dopamine, avoiding stimulant foods and caffeine etc. Give your body what it needs to down-regulate some of the symptoms. You will be surprised how much it helps. Mechanisms might be understood but causes not as much. Regardless of causes, treatments options are not all being presented as viable options, there is a wealth of non-chemical solutions available too

[@gadomoya]

I want to thank you because this video was the beginning that catapulted me into doing a TON of research on ADHD and helped me get diagnosed last month. I cannot appreciate this video enough.

[@msmunhoz]

"you're probably not even watching anymore" - oh dear lord I was paying fullest attention to every word you were saying and I did realized that this is what I think about other people while I'm talking. They start walking away but I follow them just to keep talking. :D

[@tyhayes2098]

This particular comment resonated with me. I think the exact same thing when I talk to someone. This is a new thing for me (currently suspected but undiagnosed) but it's abrelief to find out I'm not just a freak.

[@Matt-dt1td]

I was diagnosed today at 27, everything makes sense now I cannot to wait to watch all your videos!!!

[@FindingYourSerenity]

Matthew I was diagnosed at 27, 2 years ago.

[@user-pc8vn6ym7r]

Congrats for finally having answers. Just remember; it's tendencies, not a sentence. We are slower to learn some things. But it's not impossible.

[@drearydancer]

Which one? Autism or ADHD? I was diagnosed with ADHD at 13. I'm 31 now.

[@Matt-dt1td]

Autism specifically Aspergers....... since posting this 3 weeks ago I’ve realized I’m relearning how to do simple things since I was always “acting or mimicking” it’s been hard having to really pause constantly and ask who am I ? what makes an authentic personality and if I’m myself or something I’ve constructed

[@geminisduerme5266]

Diagnosed with adhd at 30. Life makes more sense now and i don't feel as detached just more included in a different category of people who have unique abilities to operate in this world.

[@EllieGirl93]

Great video! 😊 I’m a 30 year old woman and was only just diagnosed with ADHD this week. I always knew I was a little bit different and quirky growing up 😂 and now that I know I have this neurological condition, it all makes sense. Thank you for spreading awareness about both ASD and ADHD to the wider community 💕

[@noctoi]

"...I'm speaking a bit quickly, it's because if I stop speaking I'll probably forget what I'm saying..." Damn I feel that to my marrow. Public speaking is the bane of my professional life. The amount of times I've almost passed out because I'm too scared to stop talking and breathe while in front of a room full of people for a presentation. The second I stop talking I mentally flatline and the whitenoise in my head ramps up to deafening levels. Ugh.

[@greyeye5345]

Thank you for sharing this and for being so open in explaining how this feels. I know someone who use to do this, but had no idea how much they were suffering. I hope you can find peace through natural healing modalities such as meditation, etc.

[@guilhermealveslopes]

The whitenoise expression, hits it right in the spot. there are some days in which my mind is completely silent and easy to move around, no noise. Then there are others in which even if I dont notice, there's this "constant background sea of unformed thoughts coming in and out of existence silently"

[@novaalbiston6919]

I started crying reading these comments and watching this video. I feel understood and hopeful

[@sanepete]

I'm over fifty. I've always known I was a bit different. I've struggled ALL my life without realising. Being told I'm very clever but I need to apply myself. I've been clever enough to mask my symptoms. This guy has just described my whole fucking life in less than half an hour.

[@lyndahollins2881]

Exactly Pete, I am the same way, he could be talking about me .I am 56 and I always knew there was something wrong with my brain. Mum never understood, just told me it was growing pains, and I would grow out of it.

[@emmaswanswan9315]

I'm adhd combined exact phrase they would say to me or I know your smart you just need to get organised blah blah blah oh as if its that simple

[@wetsox278]

Same mid 50's always knew there was something wrong with me, but I just thought it was a glitch in the Matrix... I have learned to mask so well that I don't even know where I am at any more. I am either cured or in total denial, I don't know which.

[@tyhayes2098]

I'm 27 and I absolutely feel the exact same way. I've always known I was odd I was told before age ten i had a very high in and that was likely why I was the way I was. But I've recently realized I clearly have something. My wife clued me in to things I do that bother not only here but other people as well... this video specifically will prompt me to call my doctor tomorrow and actually get tested for one, the other, or both. Nervous about that. But at the same time I'm relieved to finally have an answer after years of questioning this. Just wanted to say you and I are in the same boat.

[@crist9573]

You are just nailed on with the ADHD part about the inablility to do what is needed to be done. There are all the plans and steps in the head but they are not just carried out.

[@salem6052]

when you said “you’re probably not even watching anymore”

[@JessicaLessnau]

Thank you so much for this. I've had a diagnosis of ADHD my whole life, but was recently diagnosed with autism, losing the ADHD diagnosis. I've felt so confused recently since a lot of the symptoms/traits are so similar. This REALLY helped me. I related very strongly to the autism distinctions.

[@chaoschaoschaoss]

For me, AD/HD is like your mind is flicking between so many things so fast. Usually. When you’re in a normal mood. However, when you are properly focussed on something, you can do that one thing so well. Its like attention is hard earned but when it comes it stays. Of course, thats just me, with the AD side of the slash. Also, sometimes you have days where things like homework or difficult work can be simply impossible. Often focussing is hard but I have days where I just absolutely cant. Its hard to describe. I know what the work is. How to do the work. How urgent the work is. And i just look at the work and my mind strays. I get headaches from trying. Then I go do something easy and relaxing that I enjoy and I feel better and work often doesnt feel as impossible after some down time. Just felt like sharing :) I guess now is one of those times when I focus on one thing really well. This comment. Hope this helps someone!

[@Neko-Duck]

Love that even this was posted 3 years ago, people are still having conversations here! Gives me hope.

[@Drakeblood97]

I never even attempted to be normal as a kid, I was always the one weirdo who never fit in anywhere and I was totally oblivious to that. At the same time it also means I did a lot of strange things openly without realizing it was strange, like rubbing my lips on my desk and getting called out for "making out" with it (I was like six years old, ok?), or using my hands as puppets to entertain myself in a class.

[@bladeofSteele]

Hand puppets in class! That's how I got through 5th and 6th grade

[@Avilla87113]

💞

[@angelaramirez4144]

That's just kid stuff

[@emboar7247]

May I ask, did your parents ever get you diagnosed as a kid? If not, have you ever wondered why your parents 'never noticed'? Do you feel remorse over 'embarrassing yourself' throughout the years without understanding why, or receiving a formal explanation?

[@drts6955]

Hahahahah I was similar but as I was able to hold my own and sort of immune to some quite cruel bullying I got, it didn't really affect me. I have family members who were massively self conscious, masked and suffers very heavy tolls because of it. I think we're the lucky ones. I still love, for example, talking to myself and do so regularly in public. I need to be able to think clearly. And it's too relaxing and enjoyable to be worth suppressing