Avoidant Personality Disorder update - getting older and uglier lol

Hey guys! I graduated college and got my first freelance job since we last spoke. Otherwise, everything is the same or worse lol. Let's talk about it.
Watch the original AvPD video here: • We need to talk about ...
Join the discord ---- / discord
Support me by purchasing a cyanotype --- anxiousavoidantart.com

[@sysye]

You might be getting older but never ugly never!

[@Oliver_Bryan]

You are not alone, I have APD. Life is hard, I avoid nearly everything. I am 49, never been on a date, not worked for years, just had to stop doing voluntary work too because of other mental health issues around my APD. Keep taking each day one at a time. (Edit: If I lived closer and did not have AVP I would come round and give you a hug, but I live in England, and I have AVP, so I won't)

[@Dseated]

You are beautiful, I like your hairstyle, your eyes light up. Your personality is enjoyable, calming and supportive. You got lots to offer. Thanks for the video

[@somyanagalia469]

Hi, I could relate so much with this video. I have recently discovered that i have avoidant personality disorder and the last 26 years of my life immediately made so much sense to me. I used to keep asking myself why I was different from rest of the world or why i was not able to participate like others but now I know what exactly was happening with me. The thing that has been working well for me is challenging my belief system, where i look for evidence if i feel that a person is judging me or if I feel that i am incapable of a job/ achievement and to my surprise I dont find anything against me. the hobby that calms me down is knitting, colouring and mantra meditation. Thank you so much for sharing this video. I wish there were more people like you!

[@phil8742]

Good to see you post an update. You're actually a pretty good communicator in front of the camera.

[@Adikova97]

I found this video completely randomly I gotta say, I've never related to someone as much as I do to you. Especially the part with avoiding doctors hit me like a tom of bricks, holy shit. Thank you so much for sharing ❤

[@earlgrayman982]

Try making small changes. They have big effects over time. eg. cutting out sugar if you're trying to manage your weight, if you feel disordered, clean one thing a day etc. It works and if you track your progress you'll see the changes and feel better about yourself, Meditation really works too. Just clearing your mind of clutter, being non-judgemental to yourself for just a few minutes a day. it adds to the bank of your well being. It's not so obvious when you are young but its like chipping away at the marble to get to the beautiful statue inside. Also, 30s hard on everyone. It's not just you. It's a transitional period and if you want to get the most out of it, you can look at it like you're in a cocoon right now, the influences of youth are less important than the direction you pull yourself in. You are master of your own ship so to speak but it does take time to learn how to steer so no need to be hard on yourself. Life is a long learning curve and as you get older you'll see people that started off better sometimes end up at the same place you are and you can end up some place totally different than you expect. Little changes. thats the key. cheers!

[@philipe5654]

Hey there, I just watched your video and felt compelled to reach out. I've been living with AvPD for over 15 years, so I understand the daily struggle it brings. I know words can only do so much, but I want to tell you that you are beautiful, inside and out. Don't let AvPD or societal pressures make you think otherwise. Wishing you all the best in your new job and in breaking the negative feedback loop you talked about. You're not alone on this journey.

[@NyteRazor]

omg! It's been so long but I still remember you. Unfortunately, all but two other people I've subscribed with AvPD have disappeared. Lee hasn't posted in a year and marnie in 7 months except a short recently where she loves singing while playing her guitar which helps her alot mentally. Even though you are still struggling, I'm just so happy to see you again since I feel so comfortable with someone who knows exactly how it feels to have AvPD. Even though I would love to be around people, I feel so safe alone. Hope you have someone to bring you joy during the upcoming holidays. Sending you lots of love and most of all peace of mind. 🤗🤗🤗

[@ayeshatirie7503]

Your way of speaking is so relaxing and kind, I really hope you may get through this mess o a life we are in, I wish you the best

[@ryanslings6234]

I'm impressed with your ability to be open and conscientious towards something so complicated. There's a lot of overlap between some personality disorders, particularly avpd, and autism, adhd, and C-PTSD. Comorbidity among many diagnoses is also really common. At a point, I feel like it becomes redundant to focus on diagnostics, and instead focus on strategies for living our best lives. We're able if we're willing. Doing what works without causing harm to ourselves and others is the way forward. Don't stop being the beautiful person I see in the video. You're awesome.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

This is also something I’ve been struggling with for years… going back and forth between trying to nail down the perfect combination of diagnoses, and realizing that to treat mental illness is to treat the symptoms anyway, so the actual cause of the symptoms isn’t particularly relevant beyond understanding. Perhaps the research is a way to stall the next step, which is proactively getting myself out of my comfort zone to actually see some improvement. 😅 Thanks so much for commenting.

[@teocantsleep4611]

In many cases AVPD is just a schizoid narcissist. I'm not saying anyone is, I have no way of knowing that. But if we talk about comorbidity and AVPD maybe that information will help someone eventually

[@brackinator1]

Truly feels like I'm watching a video about myself re. AVPD, ADHD, body checking, autism... I can relate to nearly everything your mentioned . I'm glad you elaborated on the dentist avoidance. I feel like everyone I tell about this disorder takes it at name value and assumes I just avoid things for no reason? when actually all of this behaviour is from this pathological fear of being embarrassed/negatively evaluated etc. Lately I've started to realise how horrendously I objectify myself... I did it when I was very conventionally attractive but convinced myself it was confidence. Now that I am back to being average looking, the worthlessness I'm feeling makes it so clear that the only value I felt I had then was from other people finding me attractive. I just wanted you to know that even though you didn't have any "advice", you're one of the only people who's made me feel truly seen, and a little less alone

[@susanivy3619]

You are not alone. Actually, much of your comment seems to describe my own situation..ADHD (inattentive kind), AVPD, body checking but also body dysmorphia. The only difference was that I was aware at the time of how my "beauty" (in quotes because I never TRULY felt) was a coping mechanism used to stave off feelings of intense unworthiness (and even embarrassment in a way, tho that I realized later and is complicated to get into here). Now in my 40's and after years of medicating myself, the distress of being average has passed and is now replaced by the horror and agony of knowing what it's like to feel truly ugIy, it is unbearable and embarrassing for people to see me age, esp. ones who knew me years ago. It sounds so pathetically vain, I would never utter these feelings if I knew you weren't going through something similar, at least I think you understand it's coming from a place not of the need to be beautiful, but to not feel worthless. Please get help now, I didn't and wasted my entire life. All the best.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

This is exactly my experience as well. I was conventionally attractive from high school through most of my 20s, and although I always felt “fat” even when I wasn’t, and always felt insecure, I still would use the attention I got from men for basically 100% of the confidence I did have. In my late 20s I gained a lot of weight and really spiraled but at least thought “I could lose the weight again” and be fine. Now that im getting older, it’s become a huge inner battle between wanting to give myself the grace to age and not care what anyone thinks about my meat suit, and feeling overwhelming dread for inevitably losing what little value I ever held to this society. 😞☹️

[@brackinator1]

I'm getting help, but it's still hard. I'm trying my hardest to be weight neutral because I can see myself veering into ED territory. I know if I lost weight I would feel less ugly but obviously wouldn't solve the problem of why. I've told my therapist and psychiatrist so at least I have other people monitoring it though. Thank you for your wisdom and vulnerability.

[@Dseated]

Its important to have compassion for your self and recognize the actions you have taken, protected your inner child until you were ready to set boundaries and protect yourself.

[@belzeboss.]

I had a lot of self hatred accumulated over the years; every small insult or critique I internalised and made it part of myself instead of working on it I guess. Which is what most people expect me to do if they beat me down. I'm not sure why this is like a normal thing but for me it's like the worst that can happen especially in a group setting, talking about humiliation and ridicule. Anyways, getting older, I think breaching 30 for me I challenged myself to find value in myself, after avoiding every friend, family member and person I knew, by just moving away. And oh well I discovered self compassion is a thing and no I'm just picking up the pieces that's left of me and try to make something from it. I feel like the ugliest mf alive, feel like a creep, feel like a nuisance to everyone. Feel like my existence is just not appreciated. Its so so so difficult to find value where no one else does xd I mean I'm not going around asking people what they think of me, obviously having trained my avoidance to perfection. Love your video, I'm picking them up as I go, but so far it's a emotional/struggle match for me.

[@elliottrae9355]

I remember your videos! Don't think I ever commented on any though. I only discovered AvPD in the last year or so after searching KZbin and reddit for personal stories, and resonating with the criteria. My fingers are crossed to hopefully get assessed by a psychologist if covered by insurance, but that's always tough to figure out. I have overlapping symptoms with other things and eventually would like to have a thorough evaluation, even though it's not always accessible for people. Also don't know if I'm neurodivergent, but I think it's a possibility, so I hear you on that. But I'm sitting here getting goosebumps because of how much I relate, especially when you were talking about the dentists and doctors because YES. The dentist has been the hardest thing for me. I can't remember the last time I went, so that's awesome you did (though I'm sorry to hear about the toothache and everything you're dealing with). I share similar fears and sometimes, it really takes time for me to process things. I always worry with instructions or new places or procedures that I will somehow fail or embarrass myself. I try to look up how things usually go so I can go into it somewhat knowing what to expect. And doing things in small steps. Thank you so much for sharing updates! Felt like I had to comment as I'm in my late 20s and resonated with you. I totally get about not necessarily wanting advice, just wanting to be heard and commiserate. That's valid as hell, and there are no easy solutions or fixes with any of this. It's very difficult when that burden is on us to make the changes. It's a lot of pressure it feels like. Wishing you the best moving forward! (And apologies for the paragraphs... didn't mean to comment this much lol.)

[@lulumoon6942]

So much lost human potential with our misunderstanding of these differences. Keep looking for the light, you're a warrior! 👍🙏

[@oponomo]

Well, since you don't want tips i'll just share my brief case: Hi, i'm in a similar situation, 34, not going to doctors, diagnosed with autism. Funny you mention you are very hopeful, so am i, even though i have no plans, only vague directions in life. Different from you i dislike to discuss my unfortunate present with others and hear their complains about life. I'm very positive and enjoy to talk and listen about the positives in life! My wish is to marry someone that looks as good as you and feel a bit insecure about their looks everyday but feel encouraged to look constantly better to please me, for love. I enjoy complimenting people, especialy on their more inherent traits such as looks, voice, mannerisms. People are the most precious thing in this world to me, because they are fascinating and all they want is love and acceptance. I might be wrong, but i believe when i'm with someone everything gets better, including the drive to be a better person and then i start naturaly taking better care of myself. I know, it's a lot to put on 1 basket (relationship), but it is how i feel. Ps: i'm not new to this, been in many romantic relationships before, but i still suck at life i guess.

[@alexs.3383]

maybe vagueness is a direction within itself, just socially it is invalidated by many

[@sweet2sourr]

I laugh about my pain too. Also, people come to my channel giving advice and I think, I didn’t ask you! I’m in the cluster b of personality disorders. I look forward to your content. Great outro end cards.

[@manhathaway]

Aaaa, soo much of this is relateable. The tooth stuff and all. And love the kitty. Thanks for posting

[@superanxietychick7035]

Thx for making a new video. Was hoping to see you around again. You inspired me to start my own channel talking about Avpd and the things I struggle with. The adhd is relatable but I always stayed clear of meds. Thanks for popping up again

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Your channel is incredible, thank you for making those videos. You (and the rest of the commenters) have really inspired me in return, to keep making videos, and more importantly, to keep actively trying to get better. ❤

[@superanxietychick7035]

@@anxious_and_avoidant thank you. I do hope you pick up making video's again. Not enough people talking about AVPD and what we struggle with. If it weren't for you speaking out I would have never found the courage

[@Drteomas]

Avoiding the comments seems like a good thing. It's like a minefield where all the haters hang out to just do their thing. I think haters are often nice people that don't mean the things they say as harsh as they do say it.

[@Drteomas]

Eating habits.. are choices you make and taking drugs to try to change that is just bad. Drugs are bad hmkay. They stop you from working on yourself. It's an end station and you do not want to settle in a place like that.

[@Amber24426]

Thank you for sharing this piece of yourself and your journey… I hope you are able to have compassion for what you are going through, because you absolutely deserve it. I relate to you in a lot of ways, having struggled myself with becoming somewhat of a “recluse” within these past few years… it can be so painful, I think, to reconcile with all of the time lost, and how we might be able to move forward in spite of that… I hope you can give yourself grace though, because your struggles, my struggles… they’re so *real*, no matter how much we might try to dismiss or deny them in our own minds. Anyways, I seriously wish you well. I think no matter what you might face as you continue to navigate this, that your self-honesty is so important and genuinely precious in and of itself- I hope you can stay connected to that throughout the ups and downs of living with AVPD.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Thank you so much ❤️ I plan to make a video soon speaking about the grief of lost time as well, it’s definitely been a struggle for me.

[@andrewortiz5797]

Your actually very pretty and love those eyes!! Also you are not your diagnosis!! I've been diagnosed everything from Major depression to schizo effective disorder to bipolar to Asperger's to Social anxiety disorder etc etc etc .but what I realized is I am not any diagnosis or label. Why limit ourselves? Limitations are A Lesson, not a curse!! Limitations are good because the human psych wants to evolve and wants to grow. Our main problem is that we think too much!! Our minds make so much noice and come up with all kinds stories and thoughts and imaginations and dreams and we believe them!! We can change our minds and reprogram our minds to perceive Life differently.

[@janegoodfellow1529]

Welcome back 🤗 Lovely to hear from you 🙏

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

🥰

[@Subs1338]

It definitely can get better. The two things that have helped me out a lot recently is supplementing with ashwagandha (for stress and anxiety) and microdosing mushrooms (elevates my mood, makes me more sociable and I ruminate less).

[@ryanmulvey6838]

I also have developmental disorder and personality disorder and cant get diagnosed for the same reason as you. Not 30 yet but i have been wasting time and ruining my life for a while

[@CraigDroneAdventures]

Wow come here from NewTube, and can really relate to the video. Ive liked and subscribed. Keep up the great videos.

[@samanthaspencer7404]

Hi there, what has really helped fir me is installing healthy routines. The three pilars Food, Excersice and Rest. I have found that keeping these in a dailey practice gives me structure and allow in connection to nature, meditation and self care. These help me to actually reduce any destructive behaviour such as addictions and self criticism. Concentrating on the needs and pleasures of the body keeps me out of my head for the time there❣️ Thanks for your video, makes me feel less alone with this struggle.🙏✨

[@TheMigman]

Helps me, thanks for your input ❤

[@BetaBuxDelux]

Did anyone else’s mother smoke during pregnancy? I’m wondering to what extent it alters dopamine function in a fetus.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Honestly, good question. 🤷🏻‍♀️ My mom smoked from ages 15 to probably 45 or 50. By all accounts, she quit as soon as she found out she was pregnant for the extent of the pregnancies, but would always start again immediately after. So… it’s hard to say in my case.

[@BetaBuxDelux]

@@anxious_and_avoidantMy mom smoked during pregnancy and dopamine management is something I struggle with. But it could be microbiome related so who knows…

[@tunderzx]

I have been carrying constant depression and disappointment in life for years, I have recently discovered that I share many of the symptoms of Avpd, 4 weeks ago I was on the verge of collapse, but since I understood what is happening with me I have felt somewhat better, I have I found your KZbin channel and I must say that it gives me a somewhat strange feeling to see how a person from such a distant country describes my symptoms. I have no words to describe how I feel currently, it is simply difficult for me to believe that I suffer from a personality disorder, about which there is almost no information, as if it were something contemporary, if one says okay, I suffer from "schizophrenia" it is understood, because it is a disease that has been treated for years but, avpd? Still, every time I read a comment from someone who suffers from this or your videos, I think again if this is really a coincidence, or if we are really chained to a thought pattern that condemns us.

[@alexs.3383]

wish you the best, man. That is scary to think of it in the light of completely lacking information but it's true there isn't much research or resources on how to cope / lessen suffering in this "personality disorder"

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

The chronic depression is the hardest part for me. I think I want to make another video about my experience with nihilism and feeling like nothing is worth doing when you’re isolated. 😞 Thanks for commenting, we’re in this together. ❤️

[@jenniferdragonfly88]

❤️ Lots of Hugs and Love!!! ❤️

[@riffdem1332]

Hi, i'm struggling with the same issue. I have avpd and i use many tools that are used for autistic traits because they just work so well for me. In my recent study in developmental psychopathology i came upon the comorbidity between autism and personality disorders, its actually a thing. Thank you for sharing! I admire that vulnarability🙏

[@VS04]

Maybe it doesn’t help, but I think you’re beautiful and don’t detect any asymmetry. I feel you on that though. Was super insecure about my nose as a teen, and then at 17 got head butted and broke it, so it’s now crooked (along with trauma associated with that). On top of that, having pretty significant scoliosis, dealing with hyperhidrosis and feeling gross..and now whenever I laugh hard, get really stressed, etc I have a big ol’ vein that pops out in the middle of my forehead. 😅 I almost feel like because I’ve had this feeling that I’m weird/freak since I was a kid, shit just keeps getting weirder.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Scoliosis gaaaang hahaha me too!! My posture is atrocious. 😅 But yeah getting older is so rough when you’ve been insecure forever but ironically it’s often the “imperfections” of others that I find most charming and I’ve found that filming myself has actually *helped* me with this. I hate 99% of pictures of myself because I just focus on the things I hate, but when I see myself in motion as others would, it humanizes my appearance somehow and I realize those imperfections are really just quirks that make me a person and aren’t really that disgusting or off-putting. ☺️ I like my voice better in a recording than I do hearing it come out of my own face too! Most people report the opposite tho so maybe I’m just odd. lol.

[@nastycheese1443]

I feel you 💔 few days ago i spent my 19s birthday alone in my room feeling like i've wasted my entire teenage in deppression and never enjoyed it like my peers did ,and never learn a meaningful skill due to my Adhd .and also stressing on the future and how am i supposed to spend my 20s with this disorder .the pressure has no age believe me 😢

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

🎂🥳🎁❤️‍🩹

[@sunscrave]

I don't wish anxiety on anyone. It's been so bad for me I've ended up in the ER several times thinking I was going to die. As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to die every single freaking day. But somehow, my whole life, I've gravitated towards things that put me in situations your average anxious person would run from. My job, my hobbies, my band...you name it. It's such a freaking contraction. Anyway, sorry for the long comment. I wish you the best and it was so refreshing to hear you talk.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Thanks for commenting 😊 despite crippling chronic anxiety about day to day stuff, I’m very passionate about rollercoasters lol. Couldn’t pay me to get on stage tho. 🥲

[@sunscrave]

@anxious_and_avoidant I appreciate the kind words. Edit: I used to LOVE Rollercoasters but even that now can be a challenge...actually, it's more the waiting in line than the Rollercoaster experience now that I think about it.

[@Luke-Emmanuel]

You are not ugly. You are beautiful yo :(

[@TurtlePunchEu]

I am right where you are at 29, years wasted... alone in a small room and its getting increasingly more difficult to keep going everyday :'

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

It’s not all our faults ❤️‍🩹 the world is designed for people like us to fail. At least we aren’t alone.

[@sweet2sourr]

Good evening darling ♥️ Subscribed.

[@mapsdot9223]

Attachment wounds are a form of neurodivergence, just not autism. Austism is genetic, personality disorders can be predisposed genetically but turned on epigenetically (through trauma). 'What fires together, wires together'

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Right, it just seems likely to me that those with a genetic condition like autism may be more likely to develop personality disorders.

[@CajunCraft24]

I relate to this so much

[@demaskatorr]

[@neurodivergent7744]

Hi. My comment will be the next: It really difficult have mental disorders or conditions which prevents you from living a happier life... I, as mentioned maybe earlier 48 year-old male, from post USSR country living with both ADHD and AvPD plus have some OCD... Almost during life have no sex life.... (only a few random sexual encounters and paid prostitutes) and my obsession nature lead to everyday thinking about my weakness as man and most important as human being to afraid real deep and quality romantic relationships because thinking of myself as totally failure... So to speak, I have high level of so called 'Fear of Intimacy' in wikipedia article also mention such anxiety disorder as 'Intimacy Anxiety Disorder' On surface, communication with people is not so difficult, but nothing to close relationships... I seems for everyone even outgoing and that, at first sight, is true... I seem cheerful and even agitated at times, overly emotional and very talkative... Just my some therapist and sister with cousin knows that during 20 years from 27 to 47 I had have not sex with anyone at all... Life so difficult... By the way, I have subclinical depression by Aron Beck's Inventory, Very High almost all scales by MMPI-2 and around 114-117 score by 'Fear of Intimacy Scale' of authors Carol J. Descutner University of Missouri Mark H. Thelen University of Missouri. I feel, sometimes, like life passes me by, and I am an outside observer and not a participant... See You.

[@camillasmith656]

Girl let’s avoid the IRS and The nay sayers. This is your life babe, you need some sunlight and get out of that comfort zone around some people in a new town that won’t ever see u ahain

[@Nyingmaba]

brutal choice for a title lol

[@friarpesel5646]

I like you. We like you. ❤️

[@m0thdm]

You cant avoid getting older but you are certainly still beautiful!

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Thank you ☺️ I try to remind myself often that getting older is always gonna be better than the alternative, no matter how bad it feels lol.

[@m0thdm]

100%!!@@anxious_and_avoidant

[@Ali-20244]

Related 👍

[@wah704]

Uglier? Well let's just say you can afford getting uglier cause u are gorgeous!

[@BetaBuxDelux]

Oh man, I see 0 asymmetry in your face. BTW, I’m obsessing over my hair loss.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

I’m wearing my hair here to disguise it as best I can 🥸 But I also know to some extent I’m imagining it worse than it is… and the wide angle selfie cameras make everything more exaggerated. The 30-year old adult part of me wants to say “who the fuck cares anyway” but the AvPD part says “everyone’s first impression of you is that you look like Sloth from the goonies” 😂😭 Our minds can be so cruel

[@BetaBuxDelux]

@@anxious_and_avoidant Yeah, if that is what your mind is telling you then it’s wrong. (Sorry, don’t mean to be disrespectful). Have you tried hypnosis? I hope you can turn down that negative voice because it’s lying to you. You should feel great about the way you look.

[@bibisanchez3313]

30 isn't old. Very Western type of thinking. You're young and beautiful. Cut it out.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

Yes ma’am 🥹 (thank you)

[@markaoslo5653]

I'm sure it's been mentioned elsewhere, here, in the comments - I don't see anything _"ugly"_ on this side of the screen - I know, we're not supposed to compare (because it's the context of each individual, in perspective), yet I'm 25 more than you (neener?), and that many years of deferred maintenance, drinking/smoking, the dental, and other eating, and health issues... 😉 I hear and feel, what you're saying - I do, commiserate with you. And _"don't get me started "_ with dental un-care, and the insurance foibles, in the USofA - I'm still getting replies to a comment dissertation, I did, on a related video documentary/expose, from about 2-years ago - It's 99% actual medical health, not _"cosmetic"!!!!_ 💢 Right?! [dismount, soap-box] Anyway, I wish that I would take the time to make notations, as you go along in your videos - a 'million' things light up in my head, and not only do I have to resist the urge to respond, to each point; I also have to try to sort out all the puzzle-pieces, in my head, that seemed a perfect picture, while listening, in the first place lol I hope that my sense of humor, and exuberance in comments, are well enough received, in the good 'spirit' for which I intend... I make no excuses for myself - cause and effect, are one thing, and a reasonable? amount of disclosure, for context, thank you-

[@-whackd]

Hey dear I just stumbled on this. I had a lot of anxiety constantly in the past, and I did a few major life overhauls: I switched to a carnivore diet (I must have some type of food or preservative sensitivities that cause chronic inflammation), daily meditation and calming music, daily outdoor sun exposure (I go in my back yard to use my phone/laptop most of the time). I wouldn't use a stimulant like Adderall if you get anxiety. I would look into kava kava for occasional anxiety relief. I'm doing online school right now and doing well these days. I find half of it is about the carnivore/elimination diet. Somehow a sense of clarity hits me at around the 10th-15th day of eating it properly. A lot of us have gut issues and there's emerging research on the gut brain axis. They both interact with each other and your gut microbiota actually produces 90 percent of your serotonin and 50 percent of your dopamine. You have neuronal cells all around the enteric coating of your intestine and this area is very sensitive to compounds contained in fruit and vegetable skins, grains and seed proteins, certain proteins in nuts and beans, and your gut microbiota is sensitive to preservatives and some foods like garlic, onion and some spices. That's why a strict elimination diet is essential. Some people even prefer just to eat beef only because it's simpler and they feel the best on it. There was this girl on KZbin Mikhaila Peterson who was on meds for general anxiety disorder as well as depression at the same time and the beef only diet cured her. I used to ruminate about my past a lot and I just don't do it now. I was listening to you do it and I felt bad for you, because I see your thoughts are harming you and I feel empathy. If you are tired of this pain I recommend you take a leap and try anything, even an elimination diet like GAPS diet (gut and psychology syndrome diet) or carnivore. Get tired and fed up of the anxiety and rumination, and take a leap.

[@DrPhilGoode]

Hey is your face asymmetrical?? If you laughed, you are on the right track. If not, that’s all I got…sorry.

[@anxious_and_avoidant]

As usual I will laugh publicly and cry privately 😂😭 hahahahahah