Awful Dating Advice From Wikihow

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[@etoileshojo]

they have a page on "How to accept your big nose" and one of their tips was gardening because of the developed sense of smell 😭💀

[@TheSoftestGirlYouKnow]

Me, someone with a larger nose, looking out at my illustrious garden, remembering how many times I sniffed my trees yesterday: ( ° ͜ʖ °)

[@casper6661]

Big nose? Then s n i f f

[@kai_fatallysapphic]

But what if I hate the smell of flowers wikiHow? What now?? eh I already like my big nose anyway

[@shiningdiamond28]

LMFAOOO

[@samprada9298]

I- 💀💀💀

[@wynn1437]

"date other guys to make him jealous" this is the kind of thing that works in fanfics and romcoms and no other reality

[@PragmaticProsecutor]

The most effective way of making someone fall in love with you is to be actively dating someone else

[@annaSHRRR]

And you’ll still end up falling in love with the guy you’re dating, while the target dude stays unaware

[@fwuffy_cloud]

@@annaSHRRR That sounds like one of those kdramas my friend would unironically watch. I can see it right now, girl asks guy to pretend to date her to make guy 2 jealous but they fall in love with eachother instead! *gasp* what a surprise! how original! :0

[@lacytaylor1501]

@@fwuffy_cloud I had to reread this cause my mind immediately read it as the two guys falling in love and ditching the girl and not the girl and pretend boyfriend actually falling in love

[@angelvu]

@@lacytaylor1501 long long man lore

[@caterinaaaaaa]

I was a wikihow editor when I was 11 and I'm absolutely sure I wasn't the only child contributing to that site (if you're ever reading an old wikihow article with an absurd amount of commas, you're welcome)

[@MkatSims]

You don’t know how many of your articles I read back in the day.

[@alicine-sims8988]

I think the majority of the WikiHow community was children, at least when I was 11. I remember reading all the "how to become a mermaid" articles and making elaborate sand bowls in the bathroom, and taking baths at midnight on the full moon. Aww good times.

[@calowenby1654]

@Alicine-Sims That’s actually kinda cool, honestly.

[@literallyafishhook]

completely unrelated but i find it telling about jarvis' fanbase that there's two separate sims youtubers in one single reply section, like that's half of this conversation at this point lol

[@shirollylolly1594]

@@literallyafishhook 9:32 look it's you

[@mozzfio]

when they said "the most casual of sexual encounters" all I could think about was competitive sex

[@1WEareBUFO1]

Sex any% speedrun .008 seconds

[@plantyt3246]

I’ve been unranked every season, though this is the first one I’ve been qualified for

[@wellokthen3834]

I know this was a joke but I swear I heard about something similar to "competitive sex" on some weird radio station

[@mrnobodyatallnoneed]

​@@wellokthen3834now I wanna know the details

[@aspennntree]

national sex league

[@amikastarr2909]

Jarvis isnt like other toxic boys, hes a lil bit of a book worm

[@-waqsa]

as jarvis and completely jarvis once said, “im weird. i’m a weirdo. i don’t fit in. and i don’t want to fit in. have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? thats weird.”

[@andystellar]

@@-waqsa he even wears a beanie this is perfect

[@krabiat]

and i do still subscribe

[@sarahkmiller]

This is giving me everything I want it to

[@xxeman445xx]

As a toxic boy, being a book worm is very easy I don't actually know if I'm toxic but I view myself that way

[@libertoad22]

Here I was thinking no guys wanted to date me, turns out they're just entering happy committed relationships with other women to make me jealous ;)

[@EF-kk3vh]

Now all I have to do is wait for them to retire in their old age with their long-term partners!!

[@LilacMonarch]

you just need to make them more jealous by having a one night stand with your hr person or something

[@SXLSkyya]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@subjectdelta44]

The cognitive dissonance of hearing "jarvis is fraternizing with elizabeth from hr" when you're sleep deprived, hot gluing something at 1 am, and your name is elizabeth

[@yaboicolleen]

but do you work in HR?

[@lightninjohn5651]

What were you hot gluing?

[@ammitthedevourer7316]

@@yaboicolleen maybe that’s what the H in her username stands for

[@kazoosniffer]

@@ammitthedevourer7316 Elizabeth hr

[@chewnip86]

stop i read “hot gluing someONE”

[@jijitters]

To be fair, there absolutely are some guys out there who see a woman living her life, flirting with other guys, talking about other guys, and getting married to other guys, and genuinely do think (for some reason) that they are doing all that to make them jealous. Seeing an article outright telling women to that just sounds like one of those guys coping lmao

[@Andy-jh2fs]

That's exactly what I was thinking 🤣 that article was clearly written by a guy who's like "she's only doing all that to make me jealous"

[@unknownunknown5822]

Oh yeah that was totally written by a guy. We be sippin juice in the shade and they think we're out for vengeance

[@alicia-uj4yy]

“the subconscious creates dreams to deal with problems you’re facing” got it. all you have to do is become a major problem in the person’s life. thanks wikihow!

[@mmon4252]

Right?? That’s how I interpreted it too LOL

[@disnecessaurorex4908]

Next article: "How to get rid of a restraining order"

[@kateemma22]

If you're in my house at 1am whispering things in my ear then, yes, you are indeed a major problem.

[@europa1024]

@@kateemma22 no it’s true love like Edward Cullens

[@AleksandarBell]

I had a dream about making salsa last night so I guess salsa is a problem for me.

[@jaida4547]

I once had a dream where I met Jarvis, hugged him, and then we had a conversation about personal space and parasocial relationships. Never woke up more embarrassed.

[@Holytitmouse]

I had a dream once where I met Jarvis and he told me to stop dreaming about him because it was weird. Like, okay Dream Jarvis. I remember that sometimes and cringe.

[@blumoo9938]

@@Holytitmouse that is so fucking funny

[@calicomps]

my jarvis dream was that he was at my school for some reason and when i tried to talk to him i was SO bad at talking that i immediately woke up out of embarrassment

[@sambibambi5409]

jarvis also came to me in a dream, he told me "wake up. i need to tell you something." and when i did... there he was. jarvis himself. he said to me, "youre still sleeping. the bus is about to crash". startled, i came to, immediately grabbed the wheel and steered left just in time before the bus i was driving fell off a cliff, killing me and the school kids. i cried and vomited out of embarrassment. one of the kids walked up to me at the front and spoke to me. "that'll do". it was jarvis.

[@rayb63]

@@sambibambi5409 that was an emotional rollercoaster

[@bigwhy6845]

If someone at a club came up to me and said "HEY...you down to fraternize?" I would 100% go home with them.

[@desirient]

HEY… you down to fraternize?

[@marianadias6769]

Maybe the guy who was trying to sleep with his married co-worker just thought that she was trying to make him jealous by being married to someone else, it's a perfectly understandable conclusion after studying these articles

[@mrnobodyatallnoneed]

That makes so much sense

[@wintervandy]

"How to make someone dream about you." Alright so we got some lore, Jarvis wants to be a good dream spirit and Danny wants to be a sleep paralysis demon.

[@TheClairesable]

They will face each other in combat in the dream world

[@HartleiStansbury7]

Yesss I immediately thought ab danny too LOL

[@rivermanuel1169]

@@HartleiStansbury7 same here

[@jackthenotsnack7681]

Meanwhile drew is in sleep hell on his moon pod

[@phosphenevision]

Inside of you there are two youtubers...

[@kitchensink569]

Okay I attended a boarding school wherethe computers blocked a lot of entertainment sites like KZbin and Netflix so our main source of enjoyment was ironically reading wikihow! So those reviews are all ours, I swear

[@melissalonla]

I had a similar situation as a kid but with the family computer, and yes I spent hours and hours on wikihow

[@ceri3677]

read that as bowling school, and same for my middle school

[@emilydavis9548]

@@ceri3677 high school never ends

[@ceri3677]

@@emilydavis9548 yeah if you have to repeat a grade forever

[@cyberfiretiger5825]

@@melissalonla yo put nnoniinminmmimmmommimmmimimooom poop Kenton n g b mmm no nnf king png n inn m mom mom mmmiij

[@adamco42]

I used to be a very active WikiHow moderator. Every single person on that website is insane.

[@my23bear]

"insane" because non-mentally ill people _never_ do anything unreasonable or shitty, these people *must* be mentally ill because i'm fucking amazing at psychology! Isn't that such a good way of putting it while innocent people with mental illnesses are being harrassed and murdered for being mentally ill?

[@dmitrishostakovich1447]

My boyfriend and I met online and recently met up for the first time. Neither of us had ever kissed someone before, so as a joke we said we would use the Wikihow article on it. He was talking about how it was going to be a long flight down to see me, and I sent him the article with instructions to “brush up on your reading”

[@dopeynhappy]

This is very cute

[@dionysusfilms165]

Omg my boyfriend and I met online and we met up for the first time a couple months ago. Our relationship is going amazing!

[@Sina-dv1eg]

I was my girlfriend's first partner, and after our first kiss, she had to look something up on her phone. She opened up her browser, and I got a quick glimpse of a WikiHow article on how to kiss before she quickly closed it again out of embarassment. I pretended I didn't see anything, but honestly, at that moment I knew she was a keeper

[@TheOtherBoobJustDropped]

Being the woman of someone’s dreams? Not all it’s cracked up to be. I started dating this guy and one night he woke up with like a jolt and I asked if he was okay. He said he gets sleep paralysis sometimes and it’s not a big deal. We talked about it a little more and I asked if he had like a sleep paralysis demon or if that was a made up thing and he was kinda quiet for a sec. Anyways that’s the day I learned I was my boyfriend’s sleep paralysis demon.

[@phosphenevision]

Lmao I had sleep paralysis a couple times and once I did get a demon in it but it was literally a skeletal demon w like pitch black skin and long sharp fingers standing over me 🙃 never saw like just a normal looking person

[@TheOtherBoobJustDropped]

@@phosphenevision that sounds TERRIFYING. The guy I was with told me that when he gets sleep paralysis and he’s in bed with someone he typically sees a distorted version of them in the dream and he begs them to get him out of it but they just stare at him indifferently. Shit kinda fucked me up and I wasn’t even the one having the dream 😅

[@ember9361]

i got sleep paralysis once but unbeknownst to the demon, my sleepy self gives zero shits i remember hearing loud grinding metal noises and someone screaming while someone else is preaching at me next to my night stand i just remember going "tf is this shit its too early for this sheesh" and just refusing to open my eyes lmao

[@alertsydcat6884]

@@ember9361 lmao so like a church while there’s construction outside and someone stubbed their toe on the way to sit down?

[@JokeHatesItHere]

@@ember9361 Based sleeper

[@GraceCleo]

"i just wanted to make sure you heard my voice before going to bed" is actually a very cute line but only if you are already very close or dating

[@animeartist888]

My boyfriend used to specifically request that we be in a Discord call while he fell asleep because he wanted to feel like I was there with him. It was adorable. (For the record, this is past tense because we now live together and I really am there with him lol)

[@butterflypaint4332]

@@animeartist888 thats adorable as fuck right there. I hope you have a long and healthy relationship together!!

[@Cheshieruu]

@@animeartist888 another success story for wikihow!

[@idiomatic444]

@@animeartist888 I used toget on duo calls with my bf for that exact reason! We don't do it now for various reasons but I miss it a lot

[@gwendalynnwatkins1296]

@@animeartist888 I must be really emotional today because that ending made me tear up 😅🥺

[@cecil6075]

TO BE FAIR: the wikihow never states if trying to get into someone's dreams is a collaborative effort between yourself and the dreamer. you're both trying to make you show up in the other person's dreams so they ask you to give them pictures of yourself and whisper at them

[@momothebug]

"sometimes texting your ex without an excuse may feel too scary" "this whole time I didn't realise we were trying to reengage with an ex" Jarvis, your ADHD is showing

[@jasperjazzie]

honestly same though

[@momothebug]

@@jasperjazzie Jarvis going full ADHD mode is so relatable

[@dartboardbaby]

wikihow is like if you took every person who thinks they’re good at something and then combine it with very strange behaviour and photos and then turn it into a guide

[@Whol3NothaL3v3l]

wikiHow be like: "How to catch a case 🤗"

[@mimisezlol]

Apparently a lot of wikihow art is traced stock images so they don't have to pay to license the images

[@vanadium8865]

@@mimisezlol You know, that explains a lot about the quality of said “illustrations”

[@meriammeiland7056]

How to become human

[@thottywizard]

I love how Wikihow likes to pretend people don't have any common sense and wouldn't find some of these things super weird lmao. If someone was whispering in my ear while I was sleeping I'd wake up swinging

[@buzzinbea]

Could you imagine someone giving you a framed photo of JUST themselves and hinting/outright telling you to put it on your nightstand? XD

[@Cheshieruu]

@@buzzinbea why did i immediately think of animal crossing oh no

[@emulytheemu8513]

I took a big bite of ice cream and then all I heard was “how did you even get next to them while they’re sleeping” and I laugh spit ice cream all over my hand

[@Chiwasshere]

The worst part about this is that you BIT the ice cream 😭

[@radiclelife]

I was drifting off to sleep around 5:25 and heard “…Jessica?” And my eyes immediately snapped open. What a way to be awakened with your own name😅

[@eyesofivy]

Danny Gonzalez needs to read the wiki-how on how to get people to dream about you.

[@AmelieKaren7_13]

Well he technically doesn't want to be subject of dreams, he wants to be subject of sleep paralysis 🤌🏿

[@can0cringe]

@@AmelieKaren7_13 But it is one step closer 😉 gotta prove your threat levels before upgrading to sleep paralysis demon

[@jeebsa4m3]

Deep cut

[@belindahenry2372]

how to get someone to dream about you: slightly know them in elementary school and say something mean about their outfit

[@crazyowlgirlcncowner]

I wonder how many people i have scarred in my life. I was a very mean elementary and middle school kid for no reason. I wasn't even jealous or troubled. 😭

[@Kittycouture_xox]

@@crazyowlgirlcncownerjust a menace for no reason as it should be

[@phosspatharios9680]

"If you're shy, you don't deserve love" Finally someone said it out loud

[@anothergeekychannel8384]

At 10:00 i misread it at "i tried to leave the tomatoes behind" and couldn't figure out what it meant and tbh that's probably more memorable than the actual joke

[@TheClairesable]

"How to fake drunk text your ex" Getting drunk is one of the easiest things to do lmao. Why do you need to fake it??

[@someoneidk308]

Manipulation :)

[@Miraclelittlepie]

@@someoneidk308 you adding the happy face reads this out as a threat

[@someoneidk308]

@@Miraclelittlepie that was the intent :)

[@jonathangoodwin5609]

=)

[@Somebodyelse141]

I guess for people who don't drink. 😂

[@entirelybonkers8832]

Just imagining someone buying 20 cats just “why are you buying all these cats” “ I NEED HER TO DREAM OF ME “

[@Scarawara]

audibly wheezing rn

[@Manigeitora]

Shortcut to the end goal of drowning in p*ssy

[@katalina256]

Some of my favorite wikihow dating advice I found was "be comfortable being alone" which I get what it is trying to say, but seeing how you are trying to learn how to get dates using wikihow you should get comfortable being alone.

[@bluefox8011]

My mother has an old friend that did not marry anyone because she held out for almost her whole life waiting for a man she was so enamored with since college. These people do exist and now I am sad for my mom's friend.

[@mentalhelpbotvods6701]

I’m so glad I’m a premium viewer and I can teach my friends how to be toxic partners now! (: thank you Jarvis

[@AgentRuggy]

Username checks out

[@miles2419]

@@AgentRuggy so true so true

[@makwiththebighair]

unhinged emoticon

[@elifminasvgn3959]

“On my quest to become a toxic boyfriend, womanizer, alpha male you know like all of the above, master manipulator, GIRLBOSS…” lmao tbh this had me CACKLING🤣 10:44

[@mammoneymelon]

how'd jarvis manage to list all of my goals at once

[@Elfieee13]

I love that Jarvis accidently tried some of these on us💀

[@jesterlavorre6417]

I have a coworker who i worked closely with on the same project for the past few months and has basically become my brains new Default Dream Person. so step 1: spend 20hrs a week with the person for three months and be so busy between that and school that you don't have time to talk to any of your other friends to the point where you are basically forced to become friends (all jokes we became good friends and I wouldn't trade the experience although I could do without him showing up involuntarily when I am unconscious)

[@TheAbigailDee]

I've been wanting to be a toxic boyfriend for so long thank god for this article!! And thank god for YOU Jarvis

[@oxey_]

Jarvis would be the perfect toxic bookworm 😍😍

[@mewesquirrel6720]

But you're a girl

[@silverfox5002]

I love how you're clearly a girl

[@idiot.with.the.painted.face.]

@@silverfox5002 i love how you’re assuming someone’s gender

[@mewesquirrel6720]

@@idiot.with.the.painted.face. look at the photo!!

[@clovelikethespice]

My middle school orchestra teacher had 11 cats. One of them was named fluffy. Fluffy was evil and peed on his laptop once. I have never once dreamt about this man.

[@kkimsey5866]

Not enough cats . . . 🤣

[@squiglemcsquigle8414]

It's because he didn't whisper in your ears

[@icecoldpolaroid]

10:20 Greek god of wind: Aeolus - in The Odyssey, Aeolus gifted Odyssus a bag of wind to help him make it home. He's a special case, though, since he's also the king of a mortal kingdom in The Odyssey- if I remember that correctly- more similarly to Heracles [Roman name is Hercules, as he's commonly known]. God of storms, if that's what you're looking for, is Zeus. He's often associated with wind, though. -Your local Greek Mythology nerd

[@obrgrs2547]

Jarvis knows the hearthstone god of wind but not that Zeus is the god of storms

[@concernedcitizen9223]

This advice really explains a lot about my ex. He insisted on me putting a photo of him near my bed and had one of the two of us together on his nightstand. I tried to have a discussion about how weird it is that he would insist on that, but he was too embarrassed to explain why.

[@goinggoinggone535]

Glad they're teaching how to be a toxic boyfriend. Now I'll ace that test with flying colors!

[@tristanheaton2127]

Bro you where failing before,what a baeta mail

[@Lena-xy8id]

🚩 specifically this one

[@Cheshieruu]

@@tristanheaton2127 baeta mail? i only take snail mail thank you.

[@tristanheaton2127]

@@Cheshieruu I was in a rush sigma grind set

[@Cheshieruu]

@@tristanheaton2127 respecc

[@rainbeau6760]

why be the man of her dreams when you can be her sleep paralysis demon

[@Thi-Sen]

Same difference

[@atari6400]

thank you jarvis, now I know how to be not just creepy, but also ruin my relationships

[@Schylove12]

Danny Gonzales is furiously taking notes to become everyone’s sleep paralysis demon.

[@laylakindafruity]

Lmao yes

[@Rampala]

Jarvis is like, "I tried being a toxic bully, but I just have too much decency."

[@LovelyHylian]

Wow, funny and adorable. Dangerous combo! Also, the fact that it said not helpful when the reply was to not pursue the married person made me die a bit inside lol.

[@Fionacle]

When I don’t dream about Jarvis tonight, we’ll know it’s because he took off the second pair of glasses

[@emily933]

The fact that Danny wants random ppl to dream about him and you're looking thru the wiki to learn how, love that

[@Andy-jh2fs]

"asking for a friend" 🤣

[@KweenofRats]

He needs to share his research with Danny

[@cloverfieldsandbuttercups]

It seems as though the dream advice is a fact. You, Danny, Drew, Kurtis, and Nick have been in some of my dreams so mission accomplished. Maybe not 100% accomplished for Danny, he was crying instead of being a sleep paralysis demon but I'm thankful for that

[@can0cringe]

Maybe Danny was trying to unnerve you with the crying but he failed

[@cloverfieldsandbuttercups]

@@can0cringe HAHAHA

[@can0cringe]

​@@cloverfieldsandbuttercups you're laughing he's trying his best to be the best sleep paralysis demon and you're laughing 😭

[@cloverfieldsandbuttercups]

@@can0cringe i am indeed laughing sorry danny but that was kinda funny

[@benjisaac]

I dreamed about Danny last night and he was pretty much normal lol

[@anthropomorphicrabbit866]

3:10 All 371,558 times were by Danny Gonzalez

[@garrettb2233]

I like the part where you wore two pairs of glasses. It reminded me of a time in eighth grade when the group of friends with which I ate lunch decided to take turns wearing everybody’s glasses. There were ten people in the group, and about half of us wore glasses. I can confirm, wearing multiple pairs of glasses at the same time is disorienting.

[@mammoneymelon]

it kinda makes you feel like you're in a fishbowl

[@katiek.6333]

The amount of times I have had to tell people reading your partners phone without them knowing is not ok only to have them tell me that I "don't understand". If you are in a relationship and you trust the person so little that you feel the need to do that you need to have a talk with them, if you think the talk wont work because "they will just lie to me" end the relationship. Absolutely insane someone was paid money to write a how to on it

[@mammoneymelon]

seriously, if you trust your partner that little why are you still dating them? it makes no sense

[@iamsongforsomeone994]

That's insane. I think k the only person whose phone I'm comfortable going through without their permission is my sister because she does the same thing to me and neither of us care. Also half the time we’re just messing around on each other’s cameras to fill up their storage. I post her photos to FB when she does that to me.

[@Katie-hj5eb]

The dream stuff is nonsense at least for me. My dreams tend to have random people even ones I knew years ago, seeing someone that day has no influence over whether I dream about them.

[@1993Southparkfan]

Same. Sometimes I dream of people who I never even met. Or at least, don’t remember meeting.

[@vakarebaranauskaite6691]

I had a dream about a roleplay character i created😭😭😭

[@MrIKEACat]

4:24 they want you to be an animal crossing villager fr 💀💀💀

[@Starsongzz]

This reminds me of a confession I saw once where someone said they secretly rubbed their own gums with coke, so when they kissed their crush they would get a literal high and think it was from catching feelings😭

[@marianemarangao2840]

I was about to ask "how can a book worm be a toxic bf?", then I remembered that that guy from the movie After is a thing.

[@marianemarangao2840]

Not saying that people who like books can't be toxic, I am talking about the stereotype and stuff.

[@Emu19]

BAHAHAHA Why did you have to remind me LMAOOO 😭😭

[@clovercurator7997]

Godddd that movie sucks shit lmao

[@davidceres4516]

In greek mythology there’s many wind gods, but the main one is Aeolus, the keeper of the winds. It was his job to release the winds; which are sometimes gods, horses, or just wind.

[@Holytitmouse]

Can i sign up for more Greek wind facts? This is actually fun to know

[@davidceres4516]

@@Holytitmouse Unfortunately they’re mostly background characters in other myths. But there’s a whole episode dedicated to them on a podcast I listen to. It’s called Mythunderstood. The host Paul does his research, but does make some mistakes here and there, usually owning up to it when he learns he’s done so.

[@vakarebaranauskaite6691]

I need more random greek mythology facts please

[@linneascameraroll]

i really though you were gonna segue into a fart joke there ngl

[@caananlemke]

​@@davidceres4516 I like the phrasing of "*usually* does so", as if there are a couple of mistakes that he just will not budge on and insists he has it more right than the greeks-like a modern Dante's Inferno.

[@Sycady]

The commentary community is really trying to break into the night time market. Danny's trying to become my night terror and Jarvis is trying to become the man of my literal dreams. This is truly innovative marketing

[@patheticlev]

6:35 i watched a different video right before i went to bed and when i woke up i clicked on this one should’ve watched this one last night and not now

[@marvelouslee4427]

I love how Jarvis takes time to describe Jordan as if we don’t know he’s being held captive in his bathroom. Such a silly guy

[@iconicweirdguy8678]

You know a wikiHow article is good when one of the first things it says is that it might not work

[@Yourdailydoseofsarcasm]

" the subconscious creates dreams to deal with problems you're facing " so every dream i've had up to now .... even the ones with my family and friends whom i love so much or even my crush were all cuz they were problems. thank you for opening my eyes wikihow, i finally realise now

[@mammoneymelon]

last night i dreamt about ninja the fortnite streamer... guess he's a problem in my life

[@literallyafishhook]

​@@mammoneymelon he's a problem in everyone's lives

[@katherinelampke3945]

literally watching this at 12 before bed and i’m sitting here trying to figure out if i’m gonna dream about jarvis tonight or not. like do i just leave the video??? keep watching and hope for the best??? 😭

[@patrickmcmahon8677]

A worm commentary channel would dope though. Imagine it watching a Dhar Mann video and wiggling because it's hungry. That's premium right there

[@roguestowl2280]

Yes. 100% would watch that.

[@ronanmcdonald6386]

My 70 year old grandparents have 20 cats. They used to have more. You have to have plug in pheromones that calm down the cats. You also have to separate certain cats that may not like each-other. They also have 1 outdoor cat. They also feed a colony of stray cats out in some woods near some abandoned buildings. This is in Georgia.

[@RandomJayne]

Now that I think about it, I put on ASMR videos every night and they play the entire time I'm asleep and I've been doing this for like, nine years and I don't think I've ever had a dream involving any of the ASMR artists I listen to a single time. Maybe because they don't represent problems my brain needs to work out, unlike the creepy guy who's always giving me photos of himself and sneaking into my room to whisper at me to dream of him.

[@Reepicheepchan]

Oh, hey, a Blueland sponsorship. I'm not sure I've seen one of those, but I sure wish I had found Blueland before I found Grove Collaborative. I bought all this neat stuff from Grove only to find out Blueland had the same stuff only about 5 times cuter. Like, I already got the white wool dryer balls but look how pretty these ~blue~ ones are!! Their detergent and toilet cleaner tins are adorbs. I bought the toilet cleaner (and the balls) but I already love Tru Earth detergent sheets so getting the Blueland tablets stuff because I thought the tin was pretty is probably crossing some kinda line hahahaha Yeah commenting on the sponsorship is basically the lamest possible thing, but I'm a million years old and nothing gives me joy like a beautiful under-sink-cabinet arrangement, I guess.

[@D44RK_Iced_Yogs]

How is no one talking about 17:50 that editing?! That’s just really fun and adds so much to commentary! I hope we see more like it!

[@Papersak]

That's my favorite part 😆

[@birdword111]

Jokes aside, I'm actually glad that that one article told you to check the coworker fraternization policy beforehand because some articles wouldn't and then people would just go in....but that's the least they could do, and of course it just got worse.

[@gwendalynnwatkins1296]

Something I always liked about WikiHow when I looked up stuff like "how to kiss" when I was growing up is that there were always side sentences of "make sure you have consent," "always check to make sure they like what you're doing," "keep asking to make sure their consent hasn't been revoked" and I think it's good they're really keeping to that

[@radishsayshi]

You gave us reverse asmr. Suddenly I was sitting upright, shouting with laughter. 2 stars

[@marjorinestotch9723]

Sandra's trying to make her ex jealous while the ex tries to get her to dream about him so she'll get back together with him

[@ShannonSpeaks]

I started laughing just reading the title. Jarvis really has me in a chokehold.

[@HartleiStansbury7]

I literally love Jarvis videos I yell

[@corvinjkevlihan8012]

Weird thing is Jarvis actually popped up in one of my dreams a few months ago. I had to save him from waterbenders despite having no bending abilities myself, it was very stressful.

[@s0nnasauras630]

Did u end up saving him tho?

[@Lancelyz]

"I'm pretty sure some people are listening to this while falling asleep" that's me .

[@yourfavoritetransmasc]

Jarvis, when I’m sad about living in a red state as a trans kid, you make me feel better. thank you for that.

[@hadrianryan4179]

I'm a trans adult in CA and I'm scared about the future-- I can't imagine how stressful things must be for you and other trans kids right now! Take care of yourself and stay safe. I hope things change soon. We're trying our best 💜🏳️‍⚧️

[@cannibalisticbiscuit9722]

It’s funny, because I’ve actually had a dream with Jarvis in it before. He, Danny, Drew, and Kurtis were all at the park and I went up to them. Without even introducing myself, they all enthusiastically invited me to come tour their content house mansion. Long story short, there was an ice rink in the foyer, Jarvis stayed in his room the whole time, and at the end of the dream, one of those super big long-necked dinosaurs broke its head through the roof into the house. Just to say hi. It was cool I guess

[@summerhelmer7235]

Omg 😂😂

[@coleminee]

Ok this is gonna be weird but for basically no reason at all, you were in my dream like two days ago? So perhaps the “how to get someone to dream about you” wikihow article actually worked, great job Jarvis 👍🏼

[@coleminee]

To be fair I did fall asleep watching a dhar Mann bingo video but that feels totally unrelated so

[@jpdfive]

ah yes, the good old fraternisation station 14:00

[@halatiny6537]

Dreams are complete enigmas and even if someone has been in your life forever you might not have a single instance where you’ll dream about them. Someone you met yesterday might be more likely to randomly show up in your dream a week later. It’s crazy how we have no control whatsoever of our subconscious.

[@annasutton4029]

As someone old enough to have played the original Worms I feel comfortable admitting that I would totally follow Jarvis worm and would never ever trap him in a farm or make him kamikaze

[@SuzER08]

Personally I have a worm farm and I love and respect my worms so I can confidently say I would still subscribe to jarvis if he were a worm

[@kalemjade5258]

the "how to make someone dream about you" just reminded me that ive had like 4 or 5 dreams where jarvis was just kinda there, like he didn't do much he was just one of my friends in the canon of my dream cinematic universe and i would wake up and be like "wow am I really so lonely I have to unconsciously imagine I actually have friends"

[@maryanne1830]

9:17 looks like he's a supervisor giving her a verbal warning.

[@ravenwashere1776]

I remember going on wikihow binges back in my middle school days when all the good game websites were blocked and there's genuinely comedy gold on there. For example, how to fight an ostrich.

[@made.by.ruthie]

I had wanted to buy handwash for Blueland because the limited edition botanical ones are so pretty and now I can save money and support Jarvis? incredible

[@sugasbaby5135]

not Jarvis hitting us with "would you still love me if I was a worm?" XD

[@KittyGamingtheBestYoutuber]

22:58 It depends on what type of worm you are.

[@dadmitri4259]

6:51 I can't help but notice the ridiculously inconsistent use of pronouns

[@beefcupcakes5959]

8:36 as someone who owns 20 cats, I will say it's possible and not always an animal shelter lmao Just a farm with multiple barns 🤷‍♀️

[@alexx7741]

Do they use litter boxes or do it the natural way?

[@beefcupcakes5959]

@@alexx7741 we have litter boxes for them but mostly they go outside. They're all outdoor cats (other than my two house/outside cats)

[@alexx7741]

@@beefcupcakes5959 that's cool I was just curious as to how much litter is required for 20 cats I have two and we use 40 pounds a month 🤯

[@Miraclelittlepie]

I have 5 cats i cant imagine 20 even tho that also sounds like a dream

[@beefcupcakes5959]

@@Miraclelittlepie I love them but wish I could find people to take the kittens in. I want them to be able to be lazy house cats 🥲

[@purrgundy]

"Be the last face they see before they fall asleep and whisper in their ears to make sure they dream of you" The ASMR community: are we a joke to you

[@sydneyomara5704]

7:39. ik that blurred ad jarvis. i've seen it many times on the school chrombooks. does ARE YOU GAY QUIZ??? ring a bell

[@blackqweenmars]

The first wikiHow article forgot to leave an important piece of information in there. How the fuck am I supposed to get into someone’s room at night while they’re sleeping if I’ve never even been to their house before?

[@rhysaudenart]

Someone needs to send the “how to get people to dream about you” to Danny (because of his newly found goal of being peoples sleep demons)

[@SB-lc5qg]

I love how the first part of the dreams wikihow is just *being in a relationship* (plus some creepy vibes): video messages, having pictures of each other (esp on a nightstand), talking before bed, sleeping in the same space, wearing a scent they like, etc. (the talking while they’re asleep on purpose is def the most weird). If you’re in a relationship where you’re close enough to do these things… yeah they might dream about you.

[@genevaratcliff7442]

I am experiencing grief for the 1st time and I'm pretty sure I'm in denial. Your videos have always helped and even though I feel guilty for trying to not be sad I'm so glad you posted today. It really helps.

[@someoneidk308]

People grieve in different ways- you don't have to be sad all the time to be grieving and missing them. Try to remind yourself of this- it may help with the guilt.❤

[@genevaratcliff7442]

@@someoneidk308 Thank you for the advice. I really do appreciate it. I can't even think straight and would've never considered this.

[@sohvidarity]

I know what you're going through, grief sucks so bad. Just know that any way you feel is okay right now. Wishing you the best ❤️ I know this doesn't feel helpful right now but I promise you time will make it more bearable and you can get through this

[@BouncyKnight331]

Also, it's okay to find reprieve from your grief. I don't know who you lost, but if you loved them and they loved you, they wouldn't want you to suffer all the time. Taking time to forget the bad in your life for a bit is okay, whether you have lost someone or there's a war happening or things are just not going good, everyone deserves time to just be.

[@Uvuv6969]

yeah mate, don’t feel bad. just got out of a very rough relationship where she’s still into me even though she didn’t show it one bit (which is why we broke up). I felt like shit for months because I wanted to break up with her since she could just not show me she cared, from ignoring my texts to not going on dates to never wanting to touch. But then I was like “why do I have to be unhappy”. Then I ended it, and I’m happier now because I know I don’t need to be unhappy to be a good person. whatever happened they probably wouldn’t want you to be depressed thinking about them 24/7. As long as your grieving healthy, you’re good, just don’t go into a huge deep depression, cuz yeah that’s not the best way to go about coping.

[@Tralala4Cookies]

I've been using Blueland for a while and I love the smell and feel after cleaning. Its eco friendly and I love it! I/m so happy to see you promote this!

[@myfavstuff3147]

I have to say tho wikihow was such a huge part of my dating life when I was a teen haha, the articles r cringe n funny but I find them kinda nostalgic.

[@marystone1526]

To be fair, the first article didn't specify that it's about getting a stranger to dream about you. The advice is still weird, don't get me wrong, but it's way less creepy if you're trying to get your partner to dream about you (for whatever purpose) by giving him/her a picture of you than doing that to a stranger.

[@kittee6409]

Jarvis in your dreams, Danny in your nightmares.

[@theflowerhead]

I love your channels so much. You're a great help during these rough times, thank you.

[@kaylenligon]

This video worked! I fell asleep watching it and then dreamed you interviewed me. Congrats on your success.