BEFORE YOUR EYES and my Existential Crisis

I cried both while playing the game and editing this video
Btw that angsty piano song I used for my cringe intro was "Null" by Lucas King.
I'll make the next one come out faster I promise :'(

[@RobotOnCoffee]

When I was younger, I just wanted to make my parents happy, but life was always this weird contest between what made me happy and what made them happy. At least, what I thought would make them happy. Always thought that going into tech, living that life of grinding away at a corporation, pushing harder when things got tough, that if just enough effort was put in, happiness in even a dead end job had to follow. Then, during the panini, it became apparent how much that place was killing all of us, I was the manager there and the things the executives tried to make me do just burrowed away at the soul. That place would kill you, if you let it. Quit the job with literally no backup plan, no safety net, even after ten years of a career. Rebooted an entire life, switching completely into stagecraft and production with almost no experience. It's been almost two years since quitting that place and literally rebooting my entire life from nothing, but life has never been better. If someone else in the artistic community tells you to stop chasing the thing that just makes you happier, that says more about them than it does you. It's not too late, you're not too late, we're all not too late.

[@sonder1028]

Im so happy for you!

[@NathanaNobody]

this hits me close to home. I've been producing and doing art for almost 20 years, keep going its never to late.

[@blackchibisan8116]

Neat! What do you do? I ask because I’ve been making for passion after 20 years of refining my author’s voice for the last year and I love to swap stories.

[@judas_christ01]

I have been writing poetry and stories for 23-24 years. Letting other's views of you, especially your own sometimes, can be a burden that one really doesn't need. You make good videos, good enough that I stick around, and I'm proud of you. Ya done good, kid.

[@sonder1028]

Aww thank you! :)

[@magnenoalex2]

From the binge I'm starting I absolutely agree

[@samanthaq.3691]

It's remarkable that we feel this burden almost everyday that we must live up to being something 'exceptional'. It means creating something that everyone sees and likes, it's a rat race to leave a piece of ourselves that wont be forgotten in time... but the thing is, just for us existing and navigating through this strange world we live in, we are inherently leaving a mark upon the world. Just for us being here, we change the eb and flow and the world sees a piece of ourselves. Keep on creating, you already give wonderful things for the world

[@sonder1028]

Thank you :)

[@guammy9973]

This kinda reminds me of another game called That Dragon, Cancer. another great game if you wanna feel depressed af T.T

[@sonder1028]

Totally! They’re very similar in style and story. That dragon, cancer absolutely broke me

[@magnenoalex2]

Acting is something that always interested me. Though I was always to shy so I never did it. In senior year which was 4 years ago my God. But I took an intro drama class with a bunch of 9th and 10th graders cause I needed an elective. So I did that. And not to toot my own horn but I got my teacher to cry which I guess means I must be at least decent. Since school I've had a job that I like but have yet to pursue anything with it. I never went to college and classes for acting can be expensive. In currently a waiter but don't want to do that forever so it's like oof. I just one thing that always sticks with me about that class is I took two weeks meticulously studying my script that my teacher chose for me and my partner. And I was so proud of myself when I had memorized it by heart. But then she took two chairs out me and my partner knee to knee very close together and she said go say the lines again..... Now I couldn't remember anything cause now I was actually saying it to someone and I choked up. And it's just a moment ingrained in my brain. But I definitely feel you on not doing this since like elementary cause if so maybe I'd have more options

[@sonder1028]

It’s hard, I always kick myself for not starting young when I knew I wanted to. Acting is particularly hard (I was a theater kid in high school lol) because you need collaborators to act. On the bright side, as an art undergrad, I feel that going to school for the arts isn’t necessarily worth it unless it’s paid for, because there’s few aspects of art that can actually be taught. I think most of the progress comes from honing your craft on your own. But again, with acting, that’s much harder to do. I hope you can find a way to fulfill that part of you

[@ervingabrielcolon8437]

Hey Sarah! I'm new to your channel and I just wanna say that I totally understand the struggle of your own and it's very hard to overcome the mental torture of the expectations we hold for so long. I'm pretty much struggling with a similar situation and I tend to think that I'm running out of time even when some people tell me the opposite. But your video made me feel a little less alone in these type of situations. So, thank you for sharing that part of your journey with us :)

[@sonder1028]

I'm so glad it was a source of comfort for you :) I hope the struggle gets a little less intense for you

[@ervingabrielcolon8437]

@@sonder1028 Thank you! Your videos make me feel relieved from the constant stress/anxiety. I hope for your recovery of your struggles as well! 😊

[@blackchibisan8116]

Yo homie. I tweeted about you. I’m gonna keep tweeting about your channel. Because fuck it, you funny.

[@sonder1028]

Heehee thank you :)