Being "present" as an INTJ or INFJ

Don't miss the "a concept is a nugget" compilation at the end.
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Typing disclaimer: Hi my name is Lindsay, I'm an INTJ typed in a double blind study using the scientific method on a 512 scale. Official type is: FM Ni/Te BPSC objectivepersonality.com I have also tested as an INTJ in other jungian based systems.
#INTJ #INFJ

[@s.u.5285]

This makes sense. Most aliens need training on how to breath on earth.

[@InternetLiJo]

They never tell you how hard it’s going to when you’re still on the spaceship 👽🖤

[@sikkojo]

When i breath i feel emotions

[@lulu7304]

😂

[@jaiventurer3253]

@@GentMorina Do you even know INTJ's function stack?

[@spacebanana5000]

@@InternetLiJo The breathing's just the tip of the iceberg. There's communication, clothing, social norms... There should be a special course in all these things for aliens.

[@robertmorse3201]

It is hard to be present when the conversation is boring 😆

[@InternetLiJo]

😂

[@sirphil13]

INFJ here, if a conversation gets boring, I change the subjects, and next thing I know, I'm being the counselor to someone opening up their problems and secrets to me. Then feeling their deep relief afterwards, that they found someone different that listened. However there's another side to this because if a narcissist starts telling me their problems and secrets, they get highly suspicious of me, and I've become their newest target. I know I can force myself to go gray rock and doorslam them (call it quantitative experiences), so I can go into an "observe and don't absorb" counselor mode, and they just end up eventually draining themselves. [ that my friends, is one example that being a rare INFJ, is both a blessing and a curse]

[@hajarbabi2391]

so so difficult

[@alexhendry2120]

What people think INTJs are like: cold, strategic, robots INTJs actually: "Yeah so I don't breathe correctly" Bless, my Fi adores you Lindsay 😂

[@InternetLiJo]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@courtneybeavers2235]

😂😂

[@greatwavefan397]

"Help! I can't breathe!" "You don't breathe, Jenny."

[@blackdogracing]

I accidentally discovered ‘false presence’ years ago when I bought a ‘good’ camera. I liked taking pictures of street scenes, people, the real time hustle and bustle. However, one day at work someone asked me to get my camera (before cell phones) to take pictures of an office party and it immediately dawned on me that they had asked me to be merely an observer. I was tasking myself with recording the present but not really participating in it. I had tricked myself into thinking that taking pictures of the present is the same as being in the present, it isn’t.

[@acceleratedlearning9327]

Creating pictures, creating a visual experience for later viewing is an Se thing tho. But I totally get what you mean, but I still would lean toward defining presence as any departure from the abstract

[@spring7643]

Interesting comment!! I too was/am a photographer.

[@PermaPen]

My INTJ reaction: "Why would anyone want to be more present in Reality? That just takes time away from the concepts-mining." Is Reality a concept? [Wanders off to think about the concept of Reality]

[@Agynessdin]

INFJ, same

[@camozot]

We mature when we don't ignore our inferior functions, think of ExxPs not organizing and how they'd be better off if the focused a bit more on that. Same for us IxxJs we are just more blind to our own inferior functions.

[@berkaytugrel9084]

Yeah I used to see reality as a concept. Than I realized I need to distract myself

[@aubreys1675]

😂😂😂 fair point

[@ENZERYN]

Reality is really boring! But yeah, Te says- escape reality to face/play it in your ways. So this reality escape is kinda from reality to abstract reality. Sounds interesting..

[@vaportrails7943]

The idea, "Work Smart, Not Hard" probably came from an INTJ. From my experience, one of the biggest pieces of advice I would give to an INTJ is to take care of yourself physically. Work out, maybe even play sports, eat right, take vitamins, and work on your appearance, stay well groomed, have decent clothes, and so on. Doing that improves everything else. It's not easy. It's hard to stick to it. But you can use your mental strengths on it, to figure out what to do and how to do it, and how to simplify it so you can put it on autopilot. And when you do that, it improves your other weaknesses. You are forced out of your head when you work out and take of yourself physically, and the result is that you're more attractive and confident, which helps you socially. You'll also live longer. It's win/win/win. The only problem is that you will hate doing it. That's the hard part. The discipline of doing repetitive, uninteresting things. But it's worth it.

[@acceleratedlearning9327]

Routines get effortless with practice. Hitting the Se positively will also make Ni perform better cuz they are on a cognitive axis.

[@tems4real]

I don't feel working out gets repetitive if you make it a competition with yourself. Setting goals to lift heavier weights, or to beat your time per mile can help reduce the monotony of exercise as it gives you something to look forward to.

[@smokey5lbc1]

This! This needs to be said repeatedly.

[@natebot321]

LiJo: Talking about being more present Me: "Is she using a green screen? I wonder why she's using that versus filming in her living room. Huh, I can see the lights in the reflection of her glasses, that's cool, I wonder what subset of viewers noticed that as well. I still want to know if those are prescription lenses or just blue light blocking lenses. These have to be Observer thoughts, right? I should make a comment about this, that would be so ironic." This video has excellent advice BTW

[@peterdentice5725]

As well as Iconic.

[@InternetLiJo]

Hah yes I’m on a green screen. I was using it for my video before and didn’t feel like changing location 😆

[@DanceMotherSuperior]

In the first five seconds my thought was, "She is using a green screen. That's a change. I wonder why?? I am sure she has her Fi reason"

[@naaberfindmoi2791]

What is your mbti type lol

[@DanceMotherSuperior]

@@naaberfindmoi2791 INTJ. I would not have changed it either. Lol

[@John3_17-21]

I asked my ENFJ mother last month what she experiences when she sees a sunset, and she named a wide array of emotions. Then I told her that I've tried to be enjoy a sunset many times, but all I can think about is the thicker cross-section of atmosphere that causes the color shift and how individual water particles contribute to the overall color palette. I wonder how much of the warmth on my skin is due more UV turing into visible light turning into infrared. I think about the earth's dent in space-time that pulls the last little bit of light off the horizon. By the time I finish thinking all of that, the sunset is gone.

[@jimmyoregano1]

Yes!

[@davidperfette1425]

Slow processor...

[@camozot]

@@davidperfette1425 lol jerk

[@spring7643]

Don't leave us hanging, what was her response? 😂

[@mariek.474]

Little things that really "ground" me in the moment : - having my hands around a warm cup of tea - cooking a recipe - Looking outside the window and watching the trees for a minute - meditation when I have the time/willpower 😭 - asking myself "how do I feel ? what does my body say I need right now ?"

[@mariek.474]

@gabriel vazquez I think this pratice of focussing on the present instead of speculating on the future or ruminating on the past isn't a XXTX vs XXFX thing, but more for types who have intuition first in their function stack and sensing last. Intuition is not always right, but the more data you allow it to receive from the outside world the more likely its' impressions will be accurate and not always the same imo (and can then be refined into conclusions and ideas by Te or Ti depending what type one is). ✨Definitely agree with the so relative "speed" of time passing !

[@alteaaquino1310]

When I feel like I'm floating again, I try to feel the floor with my foot, like actually feel it to the point I can describe how it feels. Sometimes, I use my palms.

[@sirphil13]

Anything involving focusing on one or more of your five senses with get you into the present moment. A couple activities, like sharing a meal or enjoying sex is using all five senses at once, i.e. intimacy is being in the present. The last answer, answering your own questions in real time is the Art of Observing Ego, which I trained myself to do (INFJ), and became my Holy Grail for staying in the present, I can turn it on anytime I want now. And lastly, when you take manual control of an autopilot function like breathing, that qualifies as being in the present, because you got behind the wheels, switched off the autopilot button.

[@greatwavefan397]

I would do that, but my heart isn't always in it. Brain: This is bliss. You feeling it down there? Heart: ❄️

[@mooney228]

I find my mind is constantly backing away from the 'now' to keep a 'gods-eye view'- such as to normalize every situation, avoid and pre-empt a curve ball and maintain composure in any possible eventuality. THIS is why it is exhausting to be around any social intensity for too long

[@InternetLiJo]

Ah I understand that completely!

[@jncc1701]

Yes!!

[@Adri9570]

That's why I love Strategy Games with "Pause" but hate the Real Time Strategy Games. The paused "whole landscape point of view" allows an easy control over the situation altough sometimes you have to "zoom in" and take in real time direct control over some specific events that create a domino effect or affect too much the rest of the situation.

[@greatwavefan397]

"god's eye view" Bro the accuracy XDD

[@mara3842]

You know, I used to obsess with being present. I had done a great deal of research and was really trying to be in the moment as much as possible. Then I came to the conclusion that all I have to do is be myself and get away from all of those Sensors in my life to whom I look 'autistic' (yes, an ESFP actually asked me once if I was autistic. I was just daydreaming.) Yes I have a rich inner world and I am going to take every advantage of that gift of mine, and leave the people who are gifted with the ability of being in the moment be in the moment. My Ni helped me get through my difficult childhood (abusive parents) and through many tough moments in my life. Instead of turning to drugs and alcohol and what not, like many Sensors end up doing, I can turn to my imaginary world. That said, I do my best to be in the moment when I am with people that matter to me or if I am doing something that really matters to me, I try to do that with all of my heart and be there as if this was the last time I see those people. Other than that, I like to stick to my daydreaming lol!

[@KatanaKamisama]

Yea... sensors will spitefully wave their hands in front of my face when they see me blissfully in my own world. The worst part is they don't even want anything... they're just doing it to be obnoxious.

[@mara3842]

@@KatanaKamisama 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

[@spring7643]

Now I'm wondering what mbti types bullies are 🤔

[@greatwavefan397]

I'm an INTJ and have been diagnosed with autism/ADHD. It's not too fun. I'll hear someone tell me to do something and interpret a very different command. I usually stim unless I'm listening to music, wearing something extreme comfortable, or otherwise feel peaceful inside.

[@andiespov3535]

the incorrect breathing method you just mentioned, I just realized I do that too... also, about being present, I literally cannot watch a video without being distracted by other thoughts or things, I find it sooo hard to be at the present moment.

[@finalgate]

I came to this realization at a funeral when I was asked to share some stories. This had been a person I knew my whole life but I was having the hardest time pulling out memories. It was like I had none. You are physically there but never mentally there so you just don’t store what’s going on in your mind. I had to hear the stories others told to remember. It’s like “oh yeah we all took a trip to that place and saw that one thing! I totally forgot!”

[@InternetLiJo]

Damn I resonate with this story more than you know. I also really relate to someone else’s story sparking the memory that was inaccessible. So interesting.

[@alteaaquino1310]

Same goes for me. It always fascinates me when people talk about memories and how they felt during that particular day. It's like, I can't pull out a special memory or I can remember it happening but I don't know how I reacted to/felt it.

[@jeffreysherman8224]

An INTJ trying her best to human is really cute. 😋 Those were some good insights too. I have a similar thing with breathing so I'm taking notes. [INFJ] Looking forward to what else you discover about this. Thanks, Lindsey. ✌&❤

[@InternetLiJo]

Interesting how so many of us in the comments are like “yeah breathing is weird” 😂💯

[@JohnDoe-tt4fm]

This sounds like a cliche but I really think 'The Power of Now' by Eckhart Tolle should be mandatory reading for all INxJs. The whole concept of being present is so foreign that it might as well be an entirely new world. It's very eye opening when you realize that you have been living in the future (or the past) your entire life.

[@InternetLiJo]

One of my dads favorite books (also an INTJ) 😉

[@KSM-mu3xx]

And the movie The Perks of Being A Wallflower is exhilarating!

[@inhop2443]

I recommend reading the Eckhart Tolle Nonsense generator. It'll open your eyes to the true vacuity of his emtpy phrases.

[@middleearthpuzzles]

Most of high school, and early twenties for me. I could tell you what I was reading, day dreaming, or planning but not what I was doing or who I was with: weird.

[@peterdentice5725]

Well, we are our attention.😎

[@roy.shrestha]

SAME

[@SannaJankarin]

SAME

[@duckydew726]

I'm an INFJ and I really relate to the breathing part. I was just watching a video about that a few days ago, and when you brought it up I was like " Hey, I'm breathing incorrectly again!" 😆

[@javierap6974]

Okay... that explains a lot!! I'm a female INTJ and my sister is an INFJ, and we are never in the present. We are like aliens in the school😂👽

[@ArianaReflects]

Meditation awakened me from the dream of thought. When we observe thought - we don’t get lost in it😌❤️🌏

[@joshy2joshy]

While there may be a solution to everything, not everything is worth solving. - INFJ

[@greatwavefan397]

I don't care if my drawers are messy provided I find what I need easily.

[@dabbinghitlersmemes1762]

entj... i felt so smart when i realised at 15 that I could run faster if I used the muscles in my calves as well. I felt this way for 8 seconds until I realised everybody else learned this at age 5.

[@greatwavefan397]

Have you ever tried barefoot running? There's plenty more to a powerful, efficient run than just your calves. :D

[@alexanderdettlaf406]

As an INTJ , being in the moment is a strange experience I would say , most of the time I don't like to go out , yet sometimes I enjoy looking at the aesthetics of the old buildings, they remind me of medieval architecture in video games , it feeds my imagination and it gives a bunch of introverted feelings, I don't know how to explain it but I kinda have visions, like a projection of my self .... I can't explain further x) . I also like being in the biggest boulevard of my town especially Friday's evenings , I enjoy watching the crowd and everything seems vivid, people well dressed , lights , instrumental music, just a fancy atmosphere. As I said I enjoy wondering but even when I'm wondering I'm in my mind , it's like I can see all of those details with no problem yet I'm not a part of that atmosphere, it's like I'm a creature from a different dimension wondering another dimension .

[@feliscatus17]

Oh my god. As an ENFP, watching a well developed INTJ talk so fluently about concepts is ridiculously satisfying. Like, it’s just soothing to my soul 🤣 my Ne is eating this s*%t up something fierce. I wish more people would go around speaking like this 🤣

[@esnardojaredralph94]

enfp always pop up out of nowhere whenever im reading about intj 😂😂

[@christalphelps6186]

I started voice lessons when I was 13 and that REALLY helped me with body awareness. I learned A TON about posture, tension, mouth shape, tongue placement and really just focusing on your body.... Especially Breathing 😉😂 also if you get hiccups a lot it is because you are not using your diaphram properly and so air gets trapped underneath causing it to spasm...

[@InternetLiJo]

🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯

[@christalphelps6186]

@gabriel vazquez from my experience most vocal coaches and choral directors teach the same way. Most people think singing is pure talent and while some of it is, there is a copious amount of training that goes into singing well. Your posture is a huge one, if you hold tension in your jaw, shoulders, lower abdomen or even feet it well throw off your center of gravity or affect the amount you can release your rib cage to get enough breath support. You need to lift you soft palate at ALL times, you need to know where to place each vowel and you need to learn to recognize where in your range you should place certain notes (head, mixed, chest, etc.) -- these are just some of the basics you would learn in most highschool and college choirs. I believe that singing is one of the most physically demanding musical activities you can do. As for the huccups I learned my trick from a doctor as well, you breathe as deeply and as low as you can and then hold your breath, then you exhale slowly, it is supposed to force the diaphragm to stop spasming... Stops my hiccups immediately as well but I'll have to try your method next time too!

[@DRAVIASTUDIO]

This video cover can't be so close to my actual experience. I always live like my body is an exosequeleton i am driving from a remote mothership. It is so hard to be in the moment. But yet so pleasant to be in the Ni ocean.

[@ELBrooks25]

That's so weird- as a kid I did the exact same thing with breathing. Having Se so low in your function stack can be so frustrating!

[@AndyLifeInVideo]

Thanks for the reminder to human today! It's something we INTJs tend to skim over if we're not careful.

[@ernobuzas9381]

Oooh, so that's why I keep forgetting things as if I never even were there. Also, I started running (for health reasons, obviously) and I too found that being in the present is very rewarding. It takes me out of some loops and helps me be more balanced and efficient. And efficiency is king, so that is my reason to train myself to be present.

[@courtneybeavers2235]

I think ENFPs & ENTPs have trouble being "present" too

[@InternetLiJo]

I agree Courtney :) I think they deserve their own kind of video with this subject.

[@ArianaReflects]

ENFP here. Meditation awakened me from the dream of thought. When we observe thought - we don’t get lost in it

[@greatwavefan397]

My brother's likely an ENTP. *He is the present.* Maybe not the most present, but you can definitely feel the room change when he's around.

[@LoyBukid]

This is the reason I keep notes, journals, and blogs 😀

[@spring7643]

Interesting!

[@FatherPhi]

Wow I can relate so hard...I personally have to use active meditation to bring myself back to the now

[@acceleratedlearning9327]

As an INTJ with a highly developped Se I can say it's really really pleasing to be able to come to the moment with ease, to tidy up or listen to music, cook, work with the hands, be with people, any Se stuff. I really enjoyed Se as a kid, handcrafts especially and rock collecting 🤩 and the out doors. I've also played an instrument since 7 (24yo now) and been on/off practicing meditation for 5 years and my full-time business is 99% Se work, and I cook and clean every day as a part of my routine. I use Ni and Te to form the image of the best possible thing I can create with Se and that vision fuels my Se and the finisher instinct fuels it too. That's just how I developed it. It's really fun yall. Go develop it. Inferior functions can actually out perform the same hero function when the inferior is aspiring but only for a limited period though, hero functions can go on forever. So yah like we can use our Ni and Te to study and then aspire with our Se and become the best at cooking or in bed or whatever, we're the best Se users when trained!! Same goes for all inferior functions. Constant practice, not even practice, just lifestyle I guess? Make it a part of life. No need to be worried about how we perform in Se guys if we get better than anybody else 😂 jk I still worry about the experience I'm giving lol but I know it's good tho. Any other developped Se inferiors here?

[@peterdentice5725]

I would say that I am. I set tile for a living. Whenever the client starts asking anything regarding what can or can't be done, I simply say "My limitation is your imagination". I like it because it engages all my functions. At times it's labor intensive, but it's slow paced. I drone about with the physical stuff and use that time to think about if what's next procedurally, really what I want to do next. It doubles as enough exercise too so I never need to workout. When they "try" to describe what they want I almost always understand what they're getting at and will roughly sketch it on the wall or a paper elaborating while I draw it. It never crossed my mind growing up the extent to where people can't picture shit in their head. They need to see it physically. Sometimes to the degree of actually putting tile up just to see if they want it like that. For me it's like toward the end of the first Lego movie when dudes dropped back into the world and is a "master builder". When looking about, I can get a good idea roughly if an idea is feasible without needing to do anything.

[@acceleratedlearning9327]

@@peterdentice5725 Yes! Seeing the Se thing fully done with Ni is so on point! Can pretty much visualize any physical project finished in any number of variations. I haven't actually given much thought to how well others can picture things in their heads. I assumed to some extent that picturing things fully done is just an obvious thing to do for everybody. When other's ask me how was I able to create something I say that I just saw it in my head and then made it. They're still amazed by it and I'm thinking like what's so amazing about that? It's the obvious thing to do. Lmao Ni hero 😂

[@airsoftBlaine]

Holy shit I think I do the breathing thing too!

[@DenisStarikov]

It is interesting that for INTJ is recommended walking and for INFJs circuit training

[@davidperfette1425]

Hey, this was very cool! Very helpful to me. It filled in some missing pieces of the puzzle. I'm an INFJ, and a clinical social worker. What you said about the Ni always trying to find that nugget of understanding that can be applied to a myriad of situations, while wanting to ignore the sensory information as much as possible, pretty much nailed something I have been wrestling with for a long time. When I'm with clients I'm not tracking every detail of what's being said. Instead, I always, unfailingly, end up grabbing onto that nugget which reveals some truth that underpins how that client thinks. It reveals where their head is at so you can meet them there and make that important connection. As you said, it's that nugget of understanding that can be applied to a myriad of situations. I had been fighting with ambivalence about this, as part of me strongly suspected there was a failing on my part by not tracking the details more closely, but this makes sense, and it's very helpful to know that it is a normal thing for people with a strong Ni. Also, regarding being present. This makes more sense of why I enjoy teaching so much. For me, teaching material that I have a great interest in allows me to bring my students to that place where I'm at in my head, to where I'm at in the abstract. It enables me to be present and feel connected with them when it goes well, and as an introverted feeler who struggles for that, it is a very big thing.

[@InternetLiJo]

Cool applicational perspective David :) glad it was useful.

[@franknelson3019]

Great video Lindsey! I’ve come to accept the fact, despite popular opinion, that as an INTJ I’m usually more comfortable living and thinking about the past and future rather than the present. I’ve also always found the abstract more interesting and compelling than the concrete. Thanks for your great work!

[@ryanquick1824]

YOGA. DO IT. after having done a bit of yoga myself in recent years, i have found that yoga is ALLLLLLLL ABOUT breathing well, BALANCE and, being present in the moment. SERIOUSLY. YOGA. DO IT.

[@InternetLiJo]

I agree!!! I used to do more stretching/yoga time and I’ve fallen off that wagon a bit 😩 but yes yoga pushes you to tune in With your breath in such an active way.

[@gadingdawala4982]

Yeah, I don't look people in the eye when talking cuz I'm busy with my Ni lol.

[@redblue5868]

INFJ, I'm finding that setting an intention to put myself first (before others) seems to set my Se into "drive". Usually Ni and Fe are in charge trying to put me in the absolute ideal condition to save the world, but as I've matured and realized I need to be balanced in order to help others, my motivation to put myself first has grown, and I'm able to sustain that me-first intention for longer stretches in the day. Has really helped with productivity around my basic needs...

[@sabrefoxx8115]

Thank you LiJo. This is what I face every second of everyday. I'm trying to improve. I plan on reading "The book of now" which I discovered by synchronicity

[@InternetLiJo]

I'm on the journey with you!

[@aoiojmnz]

I am thankful my dad is an ESTJ. I have learned a lot from his Si parent taking care of my little insecure Se inferior lol. As Ni doms especially, I think it is definitely a good idea to have a high Si user in our lives. It really goes a long way in helping keeping us grounded!

[@spring7643]

This is so true! If it weren't for an ISTJ in my life I would have floated away to outer space.

[@bruciehibma6498]

This is a great answer for a number of issues some are accused of. Not paying attention. Are you listening. You didnt hear a word I said.

[@saadhananagaraj2548]

This is so relatable cos when I'm eating with my family at the table I don't talk to anyone. It looks like I'm just staring at my bowl when really I'm like planning my day, thinking about some anime or book or school. I'm actually happier in my own head than listening and participating in conversations at the table. But my family doesn't get that. They think I'm sad LOL

[@ruthlessfairy]

Omg when you talked about breathing it took me back to childhood, I was breathing the same way as you did! Breathing right should be a subject in school, no joking. I'm saying it as a yoga teacher, I've met some people who don't breathe the right way. -infj

[@InternetLiJo]

I feel like I have more credibility now since you’re a yoga teacher - thank you! Haha and yes it should be a subject in school!

[@greatwavefan397]

That's why my (possibly) ENTP brother loves Demon Slayer: It taught him to notice his breathing.

[@marvellpower]

Hey Lindsay! What is INTJs take on adulthood responsibility? Ideas on new videos!

[@df.froz03]

when I was a child I inhaled through my nose and exhaled through my mouth and this brought me numerous illnesses. i really didn't know how to breathe lol

[@stoicx]

OMGGGGG i DO THE SAMEEE THINGGG (breathing). thankful that i'm not alone in this "presence" journey

[@boldtakes]

I’m glad you’re working on your breathing. I thought i needed to hear this knowledge. My breathing isn’t the greatest either i’d say. I get so antsy sometimes

[@intjill]

Thoughts from another black unicorn... Meditation is a type of practice. And most people start out doing breathing exercises as a focus during meditation because it’s pretty much impossible to completely clear your mind until you have been practicing meditation for years. So as a way to calm and be present in the moment which is meditation, as well, again you do a breathing exercise.

[@MichaelWinters83]

INFJ here, same problem with breathing :) I just saw some of your videos and subscribed. I like your vibe, and your face, your eyes. Maybe a little crush. Harmless I would say.

[@erikvarga4367]

INFJ here. What was a real game changer for me is when I started trying to see the "space" that objects are in, the "space" that my body moves in. That lead me to being in the present moment and kind of "supercharge" my Se which lead to me bypassing the hazy veil of Ni that was literary blocking my seeing perception.. or whatever idk.

[@UnequivocalNature]

Glad to know that I’ve been breathing incorrectly my entire life (INFJ)

[@H0wlrunn3r]

Thanks for sharing. I didn’t realize how badly I breathed...

[@spring7643]

Learning how to sing properly taught me how to breathe correctly

[@glueball214]

me: looking for Lijo wisdom, sees video title of 10/10 painful thing video beyond my grasp, yet Lijo's cred is high, so will be trying ps : thanks again for the recent INTJ growth series, that was awesome for you to do 💙

[@InternetLiJo]

THanks so much for being here Kimberly, I always appreciate seeing you in the comments

[@chibi-bombyx]

I love this!! So true for me lol. INFJ- im always looking forwards especially and often backwards to “go forwards better for the future” and i feel like i have two sort if on and off switches for each. In my late 20s now. Had a little hack where I just sorta tried to “ have both on at once” to build a semi present. Lead me to meditation practices, which has led me to breathing meditation. Still working on that part. Why is breathing not intuitive is it no Si? Lol hmm...

[@ArianaReflects]

How can you not be in the present moment? You are always in the present moment. You are always in the infinite present moment but thinking about past and future distract us from the Now. The blue sky is the present moment that is always here... Cognitive cloud just get in the way. Observe the clouds as they come and go. 😌❤️🌏

[@Tundil]

Thanks for sharing and open up your progress 🙂 Notes: Concepts are abstract and one singular concept can apply to all these different sensory variations. -> "Ni wants to interact with as little new physical sensory situations as possible if it can have that one thing that'll solve the situation that one thing that it knows will work in a certain way so it has to do less in the real world it is literally trying to escape reality." (1:59) Not realizing the own struggeling of bein present until 20 (same) Fi -> Situations you weren't present are important to you and you wish you would've been able to participate in those situations (I wish I would be as fluent in the moment as I'm in my concepts) Breathing exercises can bring her into the present. (on me concentration meditation "Third Eye Meditation" works wonders)

[@InternetLiJo]

Thanks for understanding it's a process :)

[@tutlolwow1749]

Worth content for INTJs ever

[@diegoalonsop.santos7161]

So relatable, time pass to fast to us I really need an earthquake to comeback to reality and not taking abstract information from everywhere.

[@InternetLiJo]

Sooo fast 😩

[@ben.ny_si.ms2000]

shout out to this video for letting me and my ENFJ friend know we’ve been breathing incorrectly for 22 years 😔 - INFJ

[@souledoutjas]

the thumbnail is super cool !

[@pb2382]

When I want to be present in the moment with people (catch myself spacing out into Ni), I look deeper into their eyes (from a normal distance / not creepy) and focus on their words. When I find my Ni in hyperdrive and I just know it will wear me down, I try to focus on sounds (wind, water, even just quiet. The sound of Water coming from the shower works when showering) or if I am driving, I play a meditation track (no words, just sounds. The deeper the tones, the better.)

[@diewahrheitistmitdir675]

What helps very well to breathe properly in the present moment is to take a sip of water in your mouth without swallowing. It really helps a lot to focus. The body and brain automatically know that you can only breathe through your nose, which slows things down and reduces the stress level. I got that from the movie Astral City.

[@naaberfindmoi2791]

Your endings get funnier and prettier by time 😂😂 It's hard to be present. I keep zoning out and thank you for the video maybe I'd start meditation as well

[@brooklinnratto8315]

Feels with the breathing incorrectly, my singing lessons teacher made me do the same kind of exercise to help me sing and breathe better for holding out notes XD

[@spring7643]

Exact same thing happened with me, before that I was breathing incorrectly.

[@ninadiener9806]

You're not alone, apparently i didn't stand right, which screwed up one of my knees lol my "pull back to earth" thing is currently noticing where i put my weight

[@InternetLiJo]

😂 damnit gravity what the hell!

[@alynightstar595]

Woahhhh... Go INxx with the sensory!! With Se inferior or the Se blind, this is definitely needed. Ps. I checked how to breathe and I'm surprised that I breathed in correctly too. Do your best LiJo I too love you to the moon and back!! -Aly

[@InternetLiJo]

Thanks friend 🖤

[@fazzaustralia8932]

My god LiJo you're so right!

[@sanfernvalley619]

Love that hair color on you! Good taste 👅

[@clarasousa1836]

Neither should Sensors turn to drugs and hedonism, neither should Intuitives turn to a reality scapism. Reality is a gift, with all of its joy and suffering, and we must try to pay attention to it and respond it with all of our heart. When we have grandkids, they won't ask us about the planning or dreaming we used to do, but what we ACTUALLY DID and how we responded to that calling that life gave us, in a concrete way. Humans are full of potential, but without an act, we turn simply into wasted potential.

[@moonbulletreaper8377]

For alternative breathing technique, You can also keep your hands on your lower rib area,just above the abdomen on the lateral sides. Instead of focussing on the abdomen, focus on pushing your hands to the sides. ( lateral costal breathing).

[@reneroseellema5116]

Thank you Lindsay

[@mariarinehart8667]

Nice! I have recently realized that I need to practice being present, using that weak Se. You cracked me up about not knowing how to breath correctly. When I was a young girl, I had an issue about not getting enough oxygen because of something like “forgetting to breath” correctly. It was an issue discovered while camping in the mountains. Crazy issue until you realize you are not alone.

[@ErykThompson]

Being out of touch with reality is exactly how I feel! Cool vid my friend, look forward to seeing if there's something to this breathing thing

[@InternetLiJo]

Eryk!! It’s been awhile how are you!

[@ErykThompson]

@@InternetLiJo Doing fine, all things considered. Been working on this very thing about being present in the moment. Not quite there yet, but if anyone can figure it out, it’s us 😎

[@ObeseusVsPhallacy]

(INTJ) I have discovered that people are far more receptive to my thoughts when i become more animated and speak my unfiltered mind. Its more socially draining by 1000 fold where as i would usually be silent and speak only when i deemed the input funny or necessary.

[@ryanrc]

ENTP's have this problem as well. I constantly struggle with being in the here and now.

[@consciousobserver629]

Woah that breathing thing sounds veryyyy familiar. I should look into that. I have hated wearing swimsuits my whole life (even now that I have the body I want) because of my chest/sternum. :-/ Try as I may, I have only one memory before the age of like five. FIVE!! That seems like a lot of missing memories.

[@wes1254]

The importance of properly breathing is such a perfect example, I thought I was the only one that had that weird issue with forgetting how to properly breath.

[@BekaEllen]

This is why I was meant to have a video of my wedding day.

[@Ss-hn5rf]

haha... I'll keep this in mind for my wedding.

[@kellyboyed7877]

Lol! My grandfather taught me how to breathe when I was younger 🤪 you weren't the only one!

[@karlarowan3305]

Amazing! I have been looking for this for years! Thank you

[@InternetLiJo]

Glad I could help!

[@janxeh]

The other day i was walking down the street and something strange hit me and rattled me. I had the sudden realization i could smell the sweet spring air, grass, pollen, peoples perfumes, car exhausts ect ect. Everything at once. It then dawned on me that this must be there all the time but i had not smelled all this at this intensity for decades. Must have been a glitch in the old noodle that dropped me in to supercharged SE. It is amazing to me that what i experienced was some peoples normal state.

[@Dibby47]

Me and my brother had the same breathing problem that you mentioned. It wasn't until I came across a video on YT that I realised the mistake.

[@escritoradesorientada8731]

Concepts are Tez Nuts...

[@sirphil13]

Speaking from experience, I'm an INFJ, easiest solution is to date an ENTP. They thrive in the present, and that feels great for an INFJ because it gets us out of our own heads, and we are drawing in new experiences that feels fresh, like a running spring. That relationship dynamics expands our comfort zone from inside your own room to encompassing a whole city. In addition, adds newer locations to our lucid and vivid INFJ's dreaming state, more places we visited and explored, also gets reflected, and expands our inner world too, so ENTP win/win/win. [Is it painful obvious when the INFJ walks into the room? ~smirks~ ]

[@kaster03]

Playing a wind instrument can help you train to breathe correctly.. I started playing trombone and tuba in school and it corrected my breathing technique without thinking about it...

[@InternetLiJo]

This is true! I had a short stint with bass clarinet lol

[@moatemsulongchar8418]

Yeah, I breathe in through my mouth.

[@hanspeter2534]

I agree that every problem is solvable because problem and solution are basically cause end effect. But in consequence to that fact every solution will cause another problem and by that everyone has endless problems. Isn't it astonishing that human beings have solved tons of problems since they exist and although that did not effect their contentment or reduced the number of problems left to solve at all, everyone including myself has that unfounded "unteachable" inner motivation and need to solve his or her problems as if after that there weren't any problems anymore.

[@spring7643]

I believe that many problems can be fully solved depending on a variety of factors, it's just that we are so misguided by baby civilizations who don't seek the wisdom of older civilizations. I guess it depends on what the problems are as well.

[@anudariotgonbayar9746]

Only 2 months ago I realized that my walking posture was incorrect, my right foot was placed incorrectly. I am retraining myself to place my right leg correctly. I try to be in control and shift my attention on how I am walking. Over time I have seen a patter that this exercise is actually helping me to be more in the present. Sometimes, it’s hard. And then I tell myself that by being mindful of how I walk, I am engaging my Se in a healthy way.

[@safiaaladdin3680]

❤❤Loved it .. this year I'm working on that too

[@JokerCrowe]

I don't know if INTJs agree with this, but on the subject of "Being Human", I've come to the idea that INFJ's might actually be less "Human" than INTJ's. My thinking is that we both have Ni, but INFJ's have Fe as the auxiliary function. This means that we become really good at reading and understanding the patterns in people and their emotional state. We're good at finding the things people have in common and bringing those commonalities out, working towards harmony. But - at least in my case - even though we *Seem* warm, the Fe is basically only regarding other people, we (INFJ's) are good at understanding the things and feelings in the extroverted sense, but we have a hard time with our own emotions (and understanding which emotions are *ours* and which feelings we have absorbed from others). Our only introverted functions are Ni and Ti, neither of which deals with emotions particularly well, so while the Outside of an INFJ is very warm and friendly most of the time, we (or maybe just I) can be cold/numb/completely logical on the inside. Meanwhile INTJ's have Te as their Aux, which means that they might seem Outwardly like very cold and calculating people, but they also have a fire of Fi burning in them (or should I say Fi-re?). They have a better connection to their own feelings, and (maybe I'm wrong here), are more passionate about things, and less "numb and cold". Feel free to correct me in either direction, but I think it's an interesting difference, and being a sort of numb INFJ has made me think it's unfair that INTJ's have a reptuation for being cold. Maybe a topic for another video? Thanks anyway, your videos are always super interesting!

[@InternetLiJo]

interesting perspective... I'm going to marinate on this but I understand what you're saying regarding the Ti and Fi.

[@JokerCrowe]

​@@InternetLiJo Cool! I'd like to hear your take on this. I'm not saying I'm right in my theory here, so feel free to shoot it down if you want to. x)

[@JokerCrowe]

@@InternetLiJo I think my thought was something along the lines of "The INFJ doorslam/cruelty is an indication of how cold we can actually be." I think it might be a phenomenon that's pretty unique to the INFJ. since we can appear to be very friendly and warm, it can be perceived as shocking when we're suddenly cold towards people. The sudden shift is reminiscent of a "doorslam". I'm not particularly familiar with Fi, but I'm relatively certain that Fi doesn't allow for that sort of "that person is dead/ a stranger to me"- kind of behaviour.

[@spring7643]

@@JokerCrowe I think doorslam is a protection mechanism so it's not cold at all, but maybe it is cold and I'm unaware of that. It's interesting that you said INTJ knows their feelings/identity more and is more human. I always felt really alienated from people and this is probably why, I don't have my own organic compass. I think I have been trying to build my Fi for a long time, but what I'm actually doing is probably just Se, finding what I like and dislike, and Ti, finding what is true and false and building a compass from that. I am easily persuaded to change my morals if I am presented with good proof, where the INFPs I know won't budge on their morals ever. I personally would prefer having set morals if I could choose, as long as they are empathetic.

[@delynnsimpson3640]

*sees title* ---> "ooouu, this is interesting and relatable. I think I can safely join this think tank party and learn a lot" *gets to **1:32* ---> *nodding along in agreement, impressed with break down, enjoying studying the thing.* *gets hit with **2:03* ---> ... *gulps, looks around the party, wonders if has been spotted as an imposter all along* *arrives at **2:19** conclusion* ---> 😅😬 *when you get spotlighted by what feels like one of those cartoon police helicopter search lights*

[@InternetLiJo]

LMAO Delynn this narrative gave me such a visual 😂🖤 PS when are you going to start a youtube channel? 😉

[@delynnsimpson3640]

Wooh, now that’s a COMPLIMENT! Alas, I’m quite content to be a proud supporter and fan. 🥰 *twirls nonexistent moustache*

[@nedwhitney4123]

Today is the day I learned that I too, I breathe wrong. Brb gonna go conquer the world with my corrected sternum.

[@quintuplebanned4267]

Okay, I’m not sure if you’ll be interested in my take, as an INFJ who has known many INTJs and is all partnered up with one, but what I have found, is that INTJs are quick to discard certain possibilities, in favor of the ones they are more familiar with. It almost feels like an issue of convenience, not necessarily intentionally dismissive; and they are rightly fairly confident about their judgement, because they are, in fact, very often “right”. Not a big issue, because they are so bright, they can afford a glitch every now and then, and it is a minor glitch, but I always feel that they possess such gifts; that they, themselves would hate to know that they didn’t maximize their potential, in all areas. So, I have noticed that they say they forget things, often, but they barely give themselves more than a few seconds to determine this; and in reality, there is no way a person can remember that quickly. The other thing I’ve noticed, is that over time, the INTJ will have their own reason for bringing up the subject of whatever it was they thought they forgot about, but in this context, they speak at length about what they remember, and in such depth of detail it is absolutely mind blowing, because the person they are telling will have no awareness of the fact that this person had been paying attention enough to remember much of anything, because the intj had looked so engaged by whatever it was they were doing in the particular moment they are recalling. So I think you actually take all of it in, but your unique information filing system must deem the information worthy enough to be released, in order to “remember” it. This has been my experience, and trust me, I paid attention because I couldn’t believe it myself. It is fascinating. Think about it...see if you can relate...hugs, INFJ

[@N0B0DY_SP3C14L]

*fist bump* Here are a couple of tricks I learned from Chris Voss: 1, when a person reached a pause, say the last three words they said to you, maybe phrased as a question. It shows the person you are paying attention. Or, if it's funny, say the last three words as if it's the punchline. 2, listen for data or facts and when there's a pause, recite the fact or figure back just slightly off so that the person corrects you. This will get them talking again. Never underestimate the power of being corrected. It gives you the appearance of being fallible and will give the other person at least the illusion of holding an upper hand in the conversation. It has the effect of giving the other person confidence, and lets them easily underestimate you, which, whether it feels good initially, is VERY MUCH to your benefit. It can also help you etch the information into your long term memory for access later. 3, listen for information that is relative to the conversation, but that the other person didn't realize would be so, or thought they were hiding. Voss calls this information a 'black swan', and no matter how boring you may think the other person is, the black swan will help you later, somewhere, somehow, often in a way you didn't expect. I hope these tips help you build your presence. Great vid, and great topic. Keep kicking ass, bud!

[@InternetLiJo]

These are great and useful in multiple ways :)

[@peterdentice5725]

Once upon a time I came across the word Interoception. I found the word that auto-correct tries to change it to (Interception) ironic because that's exactly what Se does with the electrical neural transmissions.

[@NancyGaming64]

INxx here lol yea i relaized after u said i cant breath properly and im not sure if its commen to feel like that all the time when engaging in the present moment and if its something serious lol

[@mackenjoshua]

I like your new camera setup.

[@Stevenn611]

The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle is the bible for presence imo. I also find the Headspace app to be quite useful.

[@KatanaKamisama]

I like menial work, because I can be in my own head, and basically auto-pilot work. So the other day I was washing dishes at work, and was thinking....."If necessity is the mother of invention, she got knocked up by sloth. Because laziness is the cause of all optimization." And then I was got to thinking what the actual difference is between laziness and efficiency. And my working definition is 'Efficiency, is aggressively pre-meditated laziness.' So yea that was my Wednesday night. It was pretty fun. Polishing plates and "nuggets" at the same time. On the breathing point, I took choir so we learned how to breath. You could always tell the kids that didn't know how to breath. They were the ones passed out on the floor.