Bessel van der Kolk Explores PTSD and Loneliness

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World-renowned trauma expert and best-selling author of 'The Body Keeps the Score', Bessel van der Kolk, offers PTSD Relief Therapy. In this series, he discusses the lonely and isolating experience of trauma. Humans are social creatures, our brains are wired to be social and thus it is vital for us to connect with others, especially when we are suffering from trauma.
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[@laurespi7129]

This is true. When when people don't understand you, they make you feel like you are not normal. So What do you do, if you don't want them to know your story.

[@hermitcrabinavan7244]

And sometimes you don’t know who to trust anymore.

[@DanielaRosenrot]

If you are already very distrusting of people you will probably avoid such activities. I know i do. It takes a long time for me to trust someone. I rather humm to music when im alone.

[@robynhope219]

I can relate...I dislike ppl for no reason other than they're ppl. I'm a lone wolf and like it that way.

[@TJ-bs4wv]

I dont know if I'm having PTSD. I have experienced traumas in my life, since the day i came to this world. But experienced lots of close familimembers die. The lates was my mom, that i witnessed died a horrible dead, late 2022🙁 Today, im a single father. taking care of my teenage son. On the surface i act strong, but the loneliness, the restlessness, anxiety, anger and sometimes loneliness is there, and it feels like its eating me inside. I have no family left, my mom, father, one of my older sister has died. I have no one to rely on, only my self. I have some few good friends. Somehow it seems like no ones can relate to what I'm going through I'm a master, to over compensate, and people pleaser, to be liked. In the end of the day, it seems like no ones care. I'm keeping on fighting because my son needs me

[@EstherBrownley]

Wow! Singing has been the most healing thing for me. This is profound

[@valuespectrum]

Really, Mental health is very important for anyone.

[@danielapearls1491]

Wow the shortest video on trauma that has made the most sense to me!!!! Amazing🥰🙏🏻✝️ Thankyou so much.

[@IcedCoffeeandChaplaincy]

Healthy Fellowships are helpful.

[@robynhope219]

I've been lonely all my life bc i was an only child of abusive parents😢

[@smokymtnhigh]

Me also. Living in hell .

[@robynhope219]

@@smokymtnhigh 😢

[@Here.there.everywhere_unique]

same with me 😢

[@robynhope219]

@@Here.there.everywhere_unique ppl like us will never completely recover😢...the damage is too great.

[@lunarose9042]

For how long? I sing in worship twice a week and pray in groups three times a week but still feel so isolated and lonely. I try to hangout in groups but find myself quickly becoming distressed and avoidance. Its hard.

[@Here4TheHeckOfIt]

PTSD makes interactions stressful because you don't trust people. So the best thing is to just take your time and do what feels OK to you, and if that means keeping interactions short, or not interacting after church, so be it. Just continue your activities if you enjoy them. If people seem kind and trustworthy, maybe you can open up more eventually. You've been profoundly hurt so it's understandable.

[@k.h.6991]

Yes, it's hard. You have to strike some sort of balance between learning to trust and love yourself, and practicing overcoming unhealthy emotional responses. The examples Bessel gives here is of people with similar trauma coming together. You worshipping at church is likely only a vague approximation of that. Better than staying at home, but it may not be as healing as you need it to be. Take it one step at a time.

[@tessamichael9766]

Try IOPT therapy… it really opens up your subconscious trauma and begins a deep healing process.

[@asjeble]

People have betray me many times. I am scared of people, i prefer animals.

[@kenitcimm3467]

Wwwwooowwww.....so much insight in such a small amount of time! Fantastic Dr Vassal Brok

[@MindGymMeditations]

A deregulated nervous system will change your perception of the world around you because your stuck in freeze or fight mode.

[@pamelabaines3604]

Have you studied Autism, Trauma, Ptsd. Our Trauma comes from it being selfinflicted much of the time. No deliberately but because we're constantly out of our depth. The memories comeback constantly, thousands and thousands of them.

[@Ilovethebush]

The issue I find is that too many group activities cost money to play

[@amandawiese3871]

I don’t disagree, however, I have social phobia, some fear of men, and deep deep shame as part of my PTSD that has kept me isolated. I can’t imagine joyfully or comfortably engaging in anything like this. I also am very disconnected from my body and even when I try yoga or movement other than walking (that has been my go-to), I feel like it isn’t even really me.

[@ElisPalmer]

🌟🙏🏼🌟

[@olivermatias2349]

💋

[@minooluna23]

I know you have good intentions. But playing an hour sport or singing an hour or so song with people is not what people need making them feel safe.

[@punyashloka4946]

Well you certainly do not know anything about neurobiology of brain it is actually helpful but you have to do it continuously and consistently then you will see the impact.

[@minooluna23]

@@punyashloka4946 I like your second sentence not because it is true but because it is your opinion and you want to be helpful , but your first sentence ruins it all, not knowing who I am! stupid comment.

[@alvaroj8655]

@Laureea You are very right in this comment. For many people those activities don't make a difference. If this were the case, specialists wouldn't study remedies such as psychedelics.

[@robynhope219]

There are as many traumas as there are ppl...his suggestions may work for some, not others.

[@robynhope219]

​@@punyashloka4946yes, but it's miserable.. doing something consistently that feels against one's nature

[@katedawson6654]

Sadly hard drugs can 'help'

[@Brody.W]

Trauma, Stress, cortisol and diabetes is what I'm saved from through the death of God in Christ Jesus of Nazareth 😅🤣😂

[@claudiamanta1943]

Note Jan 2024. This is impossible when all the world has gone mad. Why exactly have I had to suffer at the hands of the evil people and the idiotic mobs? Where to go? To whom to turn when it’s glaringly obvious what kind of animals humans really are? Humankind is dead to me.

[@paulabrett4681]

Just because someone doesn’t want to be with others doesn’t necessarily mean it’s all trauma related. Some people, including those who have experienced trauma, may just prefer to not be sociable. There are other ways to go through life without having to be pressured to be sociable.

[@Here4TheHeckOfIt]

True. For some people it is natural to be introverted. But the isolation from people because of PTSD is due to a lack of trust and sense of safety. That's different from simply being introverted.

[@ElisPalmer]

🌟🙏🏼🌟