Bill Burr&Nia - Advice: Should I Kick My Neighbor's Ass

[@oliverparker9940]

"I bet the guy steals from work"

[@jessecapra2350]

I laughed way too fucking hard at that part

[@stonwall9065]

I BET HE DOES

[@WhoisthePavmaN]

Buckled me

[@osscar6910]

@@WhoisthePavmaN 1

[@PhantomFilmAustralia]

It's funny because everybody knows at least one person who leaves work with a swag of pens, highlighters, toner cartridges, Post-It notes, and forks.

[@ChristAliveForevermore]

Nia had the best advice. Nothing hurts a man more than an enemy earning his wife's approval.

[@0zone247]

idk seems like a weird approach. Women can do this because it's normal for them

[@Vito_Caligiuri]

I mean true but they could potentially put her and the child in danger of him. More than likely he is a wanna be tough guy who’s actually a beta and couldn’t handle the fact that his wife fucked another man. So to him, the world is ending so he murder suicides his family

[@ooLevityoo]

I suppose it depends on how the wife is, but he's probably better for her and her kid

[@davidparker.2227]

@@Vito_Caligiuri Jesus Christ fucking shit dude! Betas don't just go about randomly killing people.

[@Vito_Caligiuri]

David Parker. I didn’t say that

[@Wingzero5555]

god damn I wish there was an update to this story

[@humanoid9787]

Still wishing there was one 😭

[@chrissait7464]

There was ???

[@Wingzero5555]

@@chrissait7464 really where

[@ReheatedDonut]

@@chrissait7464 link it please

[@Folfah]

@@chrissait7464 fake. Never gave source.

[@mynameishump]

I'm glad he added the part about him doing cross fit because I was totally wondering that

[@mrlikerdh]

Jack Humphrey fg

[@infinitypoker6383]

Funniest comment I've read in awhile!

[@christianc.christian5025]

@@mrlikerdh Rtd.

[@Alison_Faith]

Ayy it was relevant though. It paints a picture

[@deadmilkman121]

I was waiting for him to add that he's also vegan.

[@teerex5626]

If Bill Burr wasn’t a comedian, he’d be a Supreme Court judge.

[@tommynoble9075]

Tee Rex lol he has talked about that

[@Matty217]

Judge Bill

[@antoniohoward8529]

I’m with Nia on this one, that man knowing you had a pleasant conversation with his wife while he wasn’t there will literally eat him up inside. Build a friendship with his wife to where she talks about how awesome you are, it’ll drive him insane

[@WittyOriginalUsername]

That might end with a murder suicide if he’s that crazy

[@bluescripts100]

Yea then he starts beating his wife for being friendly with you... you gayta hit um with the 3 peeice and a soda

[@whenraindropsfall]

-3yrs late- i appreciate the faith you have in the wife but i don’t think a woman with a backbone would be married to an asshole. His wife would have a black eye, shaking in a corner like a punching bag

[@cbm3]

Who else took a swing at this guy in their head during the story?

[@jamieholmes5443]

My co-worker is laying dead over his keyboard next to me ;)

[@MultiMrskat]

Caleb I stuffed him in the trunk after kicking his knee caps out! 😭😭

[@Bigfitz2]

I hit him with a short stiff jab and a over hand right

[@mathiasmoller1989]

We all did brother...

[@thealgerian3285]

I just lean and gently tap my chin like "go ahead, you go first". Soon as he takes a swing I move my head back and counter with an uppercut of my own.

[@michaeldukes4108]

9:28 “Nawww, he needs vengeance, Nia.” The fact Ol’ Freckles said that so nonchalantly is hilarious 😂

[@jim6292]

What you do is passive aggressively drive by his house at 100 miles an hour.

[@milamnwalker4801]

Ew! What?! 😂😂😂

[@killstacy8088]

Buy an old split bumper camaro and flyby going like 120 multiple times a day and buy a usp 45 so when you get out of the car he can see it on your hip and doesn't try any stupid shit around you lmao

[@Rhekon]

It's only passing aggressively not passive aggressive lmao

[@chiefr9627]

I'll do you one better. If he pulls up behind your car going home. Go slower than granny on a rascal. Smile and wave. If he starts shit just say "You're right I was going too fast. I really was missing out on how lovely your lawn is. So no worries about the speeding champ."

[@P90XGetRipped]

Bill made a great point. The best way to get someone someone extremely anger is to invalidate their anger. Call them “cute” when they get mad and call them “tough guy” like Bill said. It’ll make anyone explode with anger 😂

[@BountyFlamor]

"I do Crossfit" Don't do it. Your neighbor will win that fight.

[@mikeschneider1624]

funny but it depends .. you know the streets :-)

[@christianc.christian5025]

@@davidlazo3740 Well, I'm sure everyone knows that now... So, how did you like the podcast?

[@Hanakowasright]

@@davidlazo3740 If I tell him to fuck off do you think he will mail me a bomb? 🤔

[@kevinodom2918]

Isn’t CrossFit one of the toughest sports out there? He wrestles and CrossFit? All he would have to do is hold the guy down, wear him out and when so tired he can’t breath you can truly humility him. Literally make him apologize when you have him on the ground slapping him.

[@OscarHernandez-bv3pr]

Has the cardio while being big plus does wrestling equals bad news.

[@ianwillis5292]

"Listen brother, come this Saturday!"

[@jonly448]

As i was reading the comments i came across yours.. almost one second after he said it in the video.. crazy synchronicity.. im on the right path

[@chaoss610]

The laughing and the "tough guy" advice is the best advice in my oppinion. It will either emasculate him or bait him into starting something. Then destroy him.

[@thelolmaster1997]

Literally just laughing at the guy and provoking him is the way forward

[@polskipanda8599]

Calling someone "sport" or "champ" in a calm condescending way is also very effective.

[@vanmorgan1867]

I HATE condescendingly being called “Bud”

[@LivingBGLegend]

Van Morgan ok bud

[@jc.1191]

Or son

[@Sir_Robin_of_Camelot]

Alright sweetheart

[@GrimmReaperRL]

@@vanmorgan1867 I bet you do pal

[@69silkyslim]

Nia and Bill ! ...I LOVE YOU GUYS together ! Need more of you and your .... LAADY!! Together !

[@SaintMaxxi]

The Bill Burr freak out and leaving the mic kills me so much, especially with Nia calmly going, yeah... you shouldve kicked his ass...

[@harrambou9468]

_AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!_

[@Beakie40k]

9:28 lol “nah he needs vengeance Nia”

[@Jason_Kang]

fuck yea nia has the right idea

[@jamieholmes5443]

The smirk. THE FUCKING SMIRK! You did not win you shit. When I herd this both my hands turned into fists.

[@willaufranc5514]

"I bet this guy steals from work" hahahahaha!!!

[@josephroberts7167]

I really appreciate Nia's advice. Few things are more infuriating than when someone you love and someone you hate are best friends.

[@caucasianafrican1435]

Actually Bill's advice is better. He's using your anger against you. Definitely act like he just amuses you!

[@Zesrii]

then make him eat your shit in front of his wife

[@MrHue860]

Caucasian African best one

[@erikbjornson6496]

nia is savage , really love her bill your a lucky guy

[@levinb1]

“Big tough guy, big tough guy!” - It’s Always Sunny

[@DaHonestAbe]

The way Bill walked away and screamed in frustration is hilarious!

[@steelerayne3860]

Nia is Savage as all hell!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣 She is so perfect for you!

[@theundergradanalysis]

Lots of internet tough guys appearing in the comments here

[@xpropriation8505]

@@devonschwartz5353 you ok bud?

[@meerak7973]

What you don t understand , and I think you don t understand a lot of things, is that people are raging because the situation was unfair. Now there is saying over in my home that s says a man who shouts a lot is a scared man so he has to put a tough front and acts manly. But it is the quiet one who is the most dangerous because while you are getting upset and start to boil up and starts to shout and the guy in front of you is cool as ice you better watch your arse.

[@FUCKINGENIOUS]

Found the guy from the story.

[@jarvis911]

@@meerak7973 I highly doubt that's an actual saying lol

[@starcrafter13terran]

go hide in a bush millennial

[@thisguy652]

I still think about this question and wonder if he ever hit the neighbor

[@destroyermaker]

He didn't. He's a pussy

[@UHcougs22]

He's up for parole in 3 years for bending the guy into a pretzel and, you know...

[@zachboyer801]

I love he started whispering when he gave him the advice about the car 😭

[@TheGamerGoat98]

lemme tell you something brother XDDD

[@SkunkFLoes]

ahh man, wish we had an epilogue

[@jameslawsonmessin]

@9:43 best piece of advice Nia's ever given

[@gladecornelius]

Man I died at the Hulk Hogan impression oh and flip the guy off next time

[@eveg5535]

“Cause I didn’t want your son to know what a little fucking fffff.. I can’t say it” 😂😂 I fucking died

[@MultiMrskat]

I love Bill & Nia. I think they have the best relationship.

[@manfred4766]

especially when she said: " then you fuck his wife "

[@MasterofPuppetsx]

Bill *dismissing Nia's call for calm* : "...no he needs vengeance Nia" lmao

[@1123-e6n]

“I do CrossFit” Yeah the 40 year old might beat you in a fight

[@JAShwartz]

"This guy has to be in his 40's, about 5'10"-Is this me?-about 250 pounds-nah it's not me." lol

[@ooberblah62]

as soon as he wanted to take the apology and tell me "you better", i would of done a U turn back to the end of the street turned back around and go down the street again but this time doing 60 mph just to slam on my breaks to turn into my driveway, got out of my car and stand at the end of my property line waiting, WISHING he would come out of his comfort zone to my property to try and make good on the promise of "you better".

[@melanphilia]

God bless that woman! 😂🥰 Right before Lovely Nia said yes at the beginning, I did the same..

[@justingreenj2]

Bill's reaction at 2:30 is priceless. XD

[@ChrisPierreBacon]

Nia and Bill are some fuckin relationship goals.

[@Clayton8424]

It’s 2021 and I need to know how this whole thing turned out 😂😂😂

[@robertglass3944]

I knew a fifty year old Mexican American dude, about 5' 6", with an obvious beer belly. He was the father of a friend of mine. On my buddy's 18th birthday, he hooked him up with a keg party, (the drinking age was 18 at the time). It was a great party, everyone was having a blast. The Scorpions were screaming out "Animal Magnetism" over the stereo system, when these twenty year old, known badass, twin brothers showed up to crash the party and be obnoxious, with a couple of their friends. We tried to stand up to them, but it took then no time all to dominate and humiliate us, I'm still ashamed to say... My buddy's dad was in the basement/den, staying out of the way, and having his own little "party", until one of the girls ran down to tell the only real "adult" in the immediate area what was going on. These dudes were big and bad, and everyone in the area knew it. They loved to fight and they were good at it. Nobody messed with them, if they could avoid it. We couldn't. Both me and my buddy were getting up off the ground when his dad showed up. To make an awesome story short, neither of their "friends" raised a finger to help them, but just stood in amazement, mouths hanging open, like the rest of us and watch the most amazing display of a man who, for twenty five years, trained the Green Beret Special Forces on the best ways to disarm, disable and kill, in combat, with their bare hands, teach some local "tough boys" a lesson in social edicate. It truly was a glorious sight to see, and he drive them to the hospital "to get stitched up" afterward, and the party resumed, with gusto. I guess what I'm trying to say is, don't judge a book by it's cover. You have no idea who you're dealing with, sometimes even when you think you do.

[@adgato75]

The thing is , sometimes you can judge by their actions. Cause I doubt that guy would have acted as the dipshit in this story did. Like a douchebag.

[@robertglass3944]

@@adgato75, In truth.., that all depends on how much he had to drink... I forgot to mention, (or, more than likely, I just got tired of one finger phone typing), it was the actions of the douchebag that made me think of the guy in the first place. I mean, he was great to be around, when he was sober or just a little buzzed, like he was that day. And I mean, just the nicest guy. The kind of guy to come home from working in the sun all day, to a room full of teenagers, and make food for everyone, or just order a couple of pizzas. But, when that man had a drunk on, yeah.., I could see him acting just like that guy. He'd never throw the first punch, (and I wouldn't want to mess with the guy who could actually land a punch on him), but I could easily see him baiting someone he thinks needs to be taught a lesson, (like driving down a street, his daughter might be playing in, at a speed he's not comfortable with, regardless of the posted speed limit). In short, I have no trouble seeing him behave exactly as the antagonist did in Bill's e-mail. That's why I mentioned it. I could have given some better examples, but I'd only known the guy for about a week at the time, and that experience really stuck with me.

[@adgato75]

@@robertglass3944 Well, some people are bad drunks, sure. I had a buddy that was the same way. He was day and night if he had been drinking.

[@robertglass3944]

@@adgato75, Exactly...

[@robertglass3944]

You just never know.

[@naughtymonkey1563]

2:56 "I bet that cunt steals from work" - I had just taken a mouthful of water when this was said and it came out my nose, still fucking hurts lmao, thanks Bill haha

[@mrbas5150]

This neighbour story made me so mad I went outside and beat the crap out of my punching bag cursing the whole time like sailor with tourettes

[@PorkPioneer]

I lost it at “LEMME TELL YA SOMETHING BROTHER”

[@TemuzLM]

"I do crossfit", you're doomed buddy.

[@tracystephens5014]

TemuzLM lmao! That crossfit line cracked me up.. the wrestling line shoulda been it. Crossfit jackasses thinking that means they'll win a fight. You'll win a shitty injury inducing pull-up contest maybe.. but if I were to throw a left hook? You better lean on those wrestling skills & leave that shitty hangclean form & "I'm wearing a flack jacket to train" shit at home.

[@theguywhoisaustralian1465]

@@tracystephens5014 yeah, but stamina mixed with wrestling is pretty good.

[@jwdathefax377]

TheGuyWhoIsAustralian - Don’t bring logical thinking into an internet conversation.

[@cbabygags2553]

@@tracystephens5014 "if I throw a left hook?". So you watch UFC too?

[@zoltancsikos5604]

Tracy Stephens Yes, I’m sure you know how to fight better than they can.

[@zanzibar6508]

Laughing at him is the best advise i promise you

[@agenttexx]

When he tries to be alpha male, look him up and down, spit on the ground and laugh at him. Then ignore him, because he's not a threat.

[@iBluairJgR]

Dude... this even made ME mad... Lmao damn that's some rough shit man.

[@XxPrototype61xX]

i want to hear an update on the guy being harassed if he ever writes back.

[@anthonyacetta1551]

I honestly still come back to this question once in a while .... YEARS LATER.

[@thelolmaster1997]

I don't if I've ever laughed harder than when Bill does the Hulk Hogan impression

[@Trapinnewyork44]

Nia twist at the end 😭😭😭😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@3DReactor]

Just throw some liam neeson lines at him

[@thehammurabichode7994]

3DReactor Remember, he wants to stay out of prison

[@porkdorkable]

3DReactor “Midi-chlorians are a microcopic lifeform that reside within all living cells and communicates with the Force.”

[@jaysplace01]

@@porkdorkable maybe not ALL of his lines hahahaha

[@davidcarlsson71]

"Yer gonna get taaaaaaaaken"

[@DannyOmu]

@@porkdorkable 😂

[@user-ge3gq2rx9p]

Nias laugh is so cute

[@mattmonk5862]

Jesus bill nia's afucking keeper bro hang the fuck on and dont let go

[@beastemeauxde7029]

9:45 *THE PERFECT SYNERGY OF YOUR TWO IDEAS.*

[@cousin_ryan]

"6'3 200" dude's a starting point guard

[@DashingSteel]

Bill was so pissed he had to stand up and walk around yelling for a couple of seconds That's golden

[@eddiehuff7366]

Dude should never ever let him get that close to him. Enter my space threatening and you are toast.

[@saintbrosef6149]

I saw this whole story in my head like I was actually there. I saw this guy's smirk, his wife and kid in the background, saw the guy in his yard screaming "SLOW DOWN!" And I even see the future where you punch him straight in the face with all your strength.

[@micolo123]

He's asking for it. You should have fucking belted the shit out him. You have unbelievable heart for walking away from him.

[@davidusa47]

If this had been me, I’d have realized why he was waiving me down before I stopped and just kept driving. True strength is not letting someone else control your life in this manner.

[@ragreenburg]

Not only that but also the guy clearly has some real problems so just tell him to fuck off and avoid him.

[@rickrenner8528]

train horn!!!-----LOL

[@VARVIS_]

Call child protection services on the guy lol

[@eXiteVideoMagazine]

My God. I’ve beat this guy up 10 different ways in my head listening to this.

[@eshuapoorv7188]

Dude I love his reaction when he read the smurk thing

[@radiopinkzeppelin2]

aw nia's laugh sounds like bill's now

[@DracoDDD]

Burr's Hulk Hogan impression had me fucking rolling.

[@supastar25]

I agree with Nia on this...go through the wife...that will truly mess him up

[@Puppy_Puppington]

Yup. Once you show respect & even apologize courteously, it should be acknowledged & respect should be given back.

[@justinstevenson2061]

To the “ say ok ‘tough guy’ or ‘ chuck Norris’ etc. Just say “oh that’s cute”. Man best one ever will get any guy pissed lmao. Tested true.

[@haian7276]

min 2:30 Bill screaming at the guy and me rewinding it over and over

[@poonaani1]

If someone threatening me said they did crossfit and wrestled "a bit" I would laugh and pole axe them.

[@evanator45yk8]

I lol’d at Nia, she’s a funny LAYDEE

[@MrWriteNuffCed]

the confidence you had, i just wanna know what is your background??? LMAO

[@jbettencourt978]

“ Alright there Chuck Norris “hahaha

[@traceydeanrainey]

Ya never infront of the child

[@caseymeyer5418]

good lesson

[@ishaangupta4125]

Nia is one evil mastermind. Amazing

[@markzambelli1010]

i think this is the best advice bill has ever given

[@michaelmaisonville5105]

“Nah fuck that he needs vengeance” 😂

[@matthewheywood8532]

If the dude doesn’t have a locking gas cap buy one put on his car and break the key in it

[@Tr33fiddy]

Nia's advice here is spot on.

[@AnthB]

Rest of the story aside, this basically proved how there’s no way to say you do cross-fit and not sound like a douche

[@cashdavenport6822]

Nia is the coolest wife

[@gosh402]

While giving the finger have a huge grin on your face

[@rynechristesen2392]

He should’ve at least just burst out laughing back as he walked back to his car lol

[@Francesco-cj3oi]

do people really think doing crossfit makes you ready for a fight? 😂😂

[@blackraven8841]

Do you watch UFC? Cardio and being gassed out early truly are in the top reasons why people lose 😂😂 Not only reason, but the are huge contributions.

[@philiplewis1989]

Lmao! I love Bill & Nia. . .

[@AlexMartinezWallace]

Present a formal challenge and suggest a boxing ring. Hope that he accepts, and if he does, beat him. If he waffles, you can berate him, call him xyz, etc. Until he accepts.

[@Joker-yw9hl]

Should have just laughed with genuine amusement when he said "You know what'll happen if you do" in the first confrontation

[@dCa991]

Just listening to this story made me mad

[@yake222]

Bill's inner Boston was coming out

[@alexjoe6714]

Yo megusto boning the wife. Love not war.

[@henmack30017]

Nia’s reaction rules

[@LetsBringPeace]

this guy sounds unstable. I wouldn't do a single one of these things. If he is unstable and owns. Gun, that's dangerous.

[@bobberry1463]

honestly what it sounds like to me was the guy kid was playing in the street or close to the street and the other guy was driving fast. his family was outside so they was clearly doing something plus he mention he dont want his kid to play in the street with asshole like u speeding down the street. so i just think he was worried about his kid and over reacted

[@ibrewer2204]

Shut the feccccckkkkkk uuppppp

[@FUCKINGENIOUS]

Fuck em I still wouldn't stand down.

[@zoltancsikos5604]

The Death Twitch 😂

[@JashariRilind]

The Hulk Hogan impression 🤣🤣